To Become One Seventh
by potionwine
Summary: It takes courage to push yourself to places you have never been before – to test your limits, to break through barriers. And the day came when the risk it took to stay tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. Kaoru-centric. OT7 ship.
1. Prologue

**Title:** To Become One Seventh: the quest of a wholehearted one half

**Pairing(s):** Ouran OT7

**Rating:** G for now, will rise in later chapters.

**Disclaimer:** Ouran High School Host Club belongs to Hatori Bisco and related companies.

**Spoilers:** The entire manga and anime; fully canon compliant excepting the last chapter of the manga (and some small deviances that will be flagged in the Author's Notes)

**Complete summary:** Following Haruhi's formal acceptance of the American exchange scholarship, the remaining members of the host club face a daunting year without her now-familiar presence. Hitachiin Kaoru is seventeen and head over heels in love with his pumpkin story. In trying to hold fast against the relentless vicissitudes of life, he discovers that the act of resisting change becomes change itself. Bringing all of his natural talents to bear, he must redesign the complex structure of their interwoven symbiotic relationships to withstand the challenges of their brave new worlds. As if that were not enough, he must prove himself worthy of the family legacy. Kaoru POV; Haruhi POV in prologue only.

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* * *

><p><strong>PROLOGUE<strong>

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Perhaps Tamaki and her father were having a competition to see who could shed more tears.

Everyone was staring at the public spectacle they were making at the Narita International Airport. It was difficult to believe that mere hours earlier she had thought of how much she would miss them all when she woke up to her last morning in Japan before her flight to New England for the special exchange program.

Her father was distraught. Thank goodness the other one had stopped calling himself her father. Tamaki was desperately trying to clutch at her, but all his attempts were foiled by her wrathful father as he subdued Tamaki through a crushing stomp on his head.

The abridged version of their laments was as follows –

Ryoji: "My cute daughter is going to a school that is filled with hormonal foreigners!"

Tamaki: "No, Haruhi, you must resist all their immoral advances! Oh my precious Haruhi, you must always keep in mind that you have a boyfriend here pining –"

Ryoji: "Boyfriend? My darling Haruhi is too good for a repulsive bug like you, and anyway she will be thinking about me every single moment of every day, won't you Haruhi? Otousan won't be there to protect you, so you must call me every night so that I will know that you are fine, ne?"

Tamaki: "I will call you too, Haruhi! I will fly over to visit you every weekend!"

– and so on and so forth, with variations on the vocabulary used but no difference in the general sentiment.

"Otousan, I am going there to study, not to play. Tamaki-senpai, are you really such an idle person that you prefer wasting time and money on long-distance flights instead of doing useful things?" she deadpanned.

"Gaaaaahn!" they shrieked, recoiling in exaggerated rejection.

Ah, she could breathe again. When sufficient oxygen had returned to her brain, she turned her attention to the rest of her sending off party.

"Kyouya-senpai, thanks for helping me to make my passport."

"Oh, it was no bother. How can I refuse any request from Ranka-san?" he replied with a pleasant smile that sent chills down her spine and made her father swoon._ Thank goodness the Academy took care of the flight and living arrangements_, she thought, _or who knows how much more indebted I will be to him?_

She had expected the twins to join Tamaki in his melodrama, but they had surprisingly not made a sound since the ride to the airport. Hikaru was hunched over in a dejected pose, his hands stuffed in his pockets, while Kaoru wore a dispirited expression on his face as his eyes fixed unwaveringly on her. The twins' silence could have been construed as a sign of growing maturity and admirable composure were it not for the fact that to do so would be to display a complete ignorance of their personalities. Uncharacteristic behaviour from them was _always_ worrying.

"Hikaru, Kaoru," she began haltingly, sincerely – maybe she should also summon the courage to confess to them how much she appreciated their friendship, just like she confessed her love to Tamaki – "I will really miss you."

The next moment, she was sandwiched between two warm bodies in a hug no less fierce than the one her father had given her.

"Our lazy heroine is really going to step out into the exciting world!" Hikaru gave a small, hollow laugh. "Are you nervous about going to another country for the first time?"

"No," she answered truthfully, "I am determined to do this. I will learn as much as I can so that I can become better and better."

She saw Kaoru's eyes widen in surprise for a brief moment, as though he had abruptly understood something about her – she blinked, and the expression was gone, leaving nothing but traces of a shrewd awareness camouflaged by the mischievous sparkles perpetually present in his gold eyes. "Part of being so active, Haruhi, is making sure that you check your email regularly on the laptop we gave you, okay? We've even set up your email account for you. That way you can stay updated about everybody in Ouran."

"Yes, thanks!" She wouldn't like to be left out of the loop, after all. Her final year of high school would still be spent in Ouran with the classmates she had come to know so well, and many of her regular designators in the host club had been unceasingly kind and helpful to her.

"Don't bully the class president too much when I am away," she added just as her attention was diverted by a diminutive body that tackled her in a flying hug and fastened onto her.

"Haru-chan, Haru-chan, I'll miss you so much!" choked Honey as he dissolved in a barrage of tears and sad, cute sounds. Mori held several handkerchiefs in his hand, wiping Honey's face periodically. The corners of Mori's lips curved down slightly, an expression she remembered seeing on his face when that whole fiasco had happened with Tamaki's family. She almost smiled at that small visible indicator of Mori's moodiness – somehow it lifted her heart to know that she could in fact recognise when Mori was feeling certain emotions, even if it might sound mean to be glad when he was sad.

It seemed that the emotional dynamics of any situation they happened to be in would always be magnified beyond all proportion by the host club. All of them had already made plans to visit her in America where possible. Nearly all of them would call her every single day, she could already tell. Clearly, they did not take this to mean that they should stop acting as though this would be the last time they would see her. The mood was so sombre it was comical, and Mei-chan seemed to be the only one who retained any objectivity. The irony was not lost on Haruhi, since Mei-chan was the only one out of this group without the ability to fly first-class to the United States as and when she likes.

Mei-chan and the Hitachiin brothers had spent the last few weeks endlessly ransacking through her meticulously arranged wardrobe to ensure that the clothes going into the luggage were the sort that could actually be permitted to see the light of day. Although free dressing did not apply, the school adhered only to a dress code and not to a full set of uniform. These three members of the fashion police had vetoed all of her clothing, using a range of progressively more insulting words to describe the items they had plucked out of her wardrobe. With Ranka-san's ardent support, they had laboured to revamp her image entirely, which had essentially meant packing Haruhi's luggage for her.

It was time for her to board her flight. A rush of exhilaration swept through her. She had earned this. She would _experience_ this.

She waved; they waved back.

She smiled; they smiled back and there was an unbearable tugging at her heartstrings...

One year from now, without fail.

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><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) Originally written to commemorate the release of the last chapter (Chapter 83) of the manga series.

(b) The short summary for this fic is a direct quote from the work of Anaïs Nin, called 'Risk'.

(c) As mentioned, since the last chapter of Ouran has not happened for the purposes of this fic, so Haruhi's sending off party consists of the host club, her father, and Mei-chan. It does not include the customers of the host club (as in the manga). Further, the 'big reveal' of Haruhi's sex/gender to the rest of the school has also not happened, as that party took place in the last chapter. Therefore, the customers remain unaware of Haruhi's real sex/gender.

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_Next Chapter:_

_1. Starting Today, You Are an Intern!_


	2. Chapter 1A

**CHAPTER ONE(A)**

**Starting Today, You are an Intern!**

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From: Fujioka Haruhi [haruhi_tanuki (a) ouranhostclub . com]  
>To: Hitachiin Twins [doubletrouble (a) ouranhostclub . com]<br>Subject: Stop spamming me!  
>Date: Sat, 4 Sep 2010<p>

Why is everyone sending me emails about every little thing in their lives? Didn't school start last week? Why are all of you so free?

I am trying to settle in. The past two weeks have been very busy. School is officially starting this Friday, but new students are expected to arrive at the school this Wednesday.

Ouran has arranged for me to stay with a guardian family before I head off to board. This family has 3 children also enrolled in my school. I think the parents might be quite important people, but I'm not sure.

I have toured around the massive school grounds! I thought that Ouran would have prepared me for big schools, but because this school is away from the city, so maybe that's why they have so much more land. I've never been in a boarding house before. I'm getting a lot of practice with my English. It's really different and much more difficult being in an environment where you have to use English all the time, but I'm improving so much.

Kaoru, Hikaru, thank you very much for helping me to prepare my luggage. The dress code leaves so much room for guessing. Actually, I thought it was really annoying that Mei-chan and you both wouldn't stop messing with my clothes, but I'm really grateful to all three of you for putting in a lot of suitable clothing, even though at least half of them are really questionable.

When I move into the school, I'll see if I have some time to take the photographs you requested. Kaoru, please remind Tamaki-senpai that I'm not taking photographs of myself for him, but to let my father know that I am doing well. If Kyouya-senpai asks you to put them on the website, do you mind refusing?

Haruhi

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><p>.<p>

They lack the elasticity to revert to the way they once were. The protective shield enveloping their little host club world had been irrevocably distended by the addition of Haruhi, and no one seems to remember how a six-person club is supposed to operate. Now there is sagging around the space she formerly occupied, like excess cloth rippling over a wasted body, secrets and new silences hidden in the collapsed drapes of an unforseen and all too sudden atrophy.

It seems to Kaoru that Hikaru is withering under emotions beyond his ability to name or express. A curious lethargy now grips Hikaru as he occupies his days with naps, computer games and the mechanical routine of daily homework. Haruhi has been gone for two weeks – during that time the host club has not met up at all. Arguably, it is because it was the term holidays, but that ignores the fact that the host club generally spends the entire holidays together.

The second trimester has begun, but with the senpais either in university or in a different level and class, the club members have barely seen each other. Nothing has been said about their club; all the other clubs have recommenced activities. Kaoru is starting to feel a paralysing fear that Hikaru and he would be forced to face the stark prospect of abandonment to their prior insular lives. What was once so comforting feels sharply threatening now.

To Hikaru's unnatural stillness, Kaoru generates an equal and opposite restlessness, quivering with an inexplicable need to unleash his agitation. This reversal of emotional states, he thinks, is a direct consequence of the departure of the person who first drew the dividing line between the twins. They have become the other person in terms of their emotions – after only a few months of individuality, Kaoru is Hikaru once more.

Perhaps it is his unrelenting worry for the state his brother has fallen into. They are stricken by inertia – Kaoru had moved on from Haruhi, and now cannot stop moving. Hikaru had halted at Haruhi, and now cannot start up again.

At this moment, his beloved Hikaru is probably napping in their bedroom or fiddling listlessly with their new game. It is heartbreaking for Kaoru to watch his brother be this way, and in his oppressive sorrow he had fled to the family study room to calm down.

He spends a good hour bouncing around the room tetchily before deciding to check his email. Originally he had not wanted to, because he has been checking every day for a reply from his best friend only to be disappointed.

As such, he stares blankly at the screen in stupefaction. _She replied!_

The excitement that shines through in her words reminds Kaoru of their interaction at the airport. He remembers his surprise and relief when she said she would miss them – irrefutable proof that they had managed to move Haruhi's heart. The old Haruhi would have jumped at the exchange program, but they have become so integral to her life that she, Fujioka Haruhi, all-round hardworking scholarship student, had hesitated to accept the opportunity offered to her. It was almost as though not going had actually been some sort of acceptable option, but ultimately her decision to go was motivated mostly by a new desire to improve herself as a person and not just as a student. All these radical changes, he understands now, are inspired by a Tamaki-flavoured perspective. Her thoughts bear the hallmarks of someone who keeps Tamaki at the forefront of her mind, who remains profoundly affected by the idiot, who has decided to do something (in part) for him.

Hopefully Hikaru has not made that particular connection. There really is no need to rub salt on wounds, even if Hikaru claims to have accepted his honourable defeat.

Something needs to happen now. Somebody needs to make something happen.

Kaoru admits to thinking that Kyouya would be that person – the person to reassemble the club, the person to teach them how to adapt, the person who would recall them to their host club home. This realisation startles Kaoru slightly – does he really think of Kyouya as their unofficial mother? Why else would he saddle Kyouya with all these responsibilities? Or is it that he has also come to believe in Kyouya's invincibility?

Aside from Kyouya, the only other person with such strength is Tamaki, but Tamaki is surely useless now. If Hikaru's unfinished romantic entanglement with Haruhi is causing him that much suffering, Kaoru can barely imagine how their precious Tono must be coping. He wonders whether Tamaki is bothering Kyouya with lamentations on his interrupted relationship and how long Kyouya will tolerate it before expelling Tamaki from the Ootori premises.

The question that Kaoru must answer now is: just how much temerity does a Hitachiin have?

The room blushes in the soft hues of twilight before plunging into darkness; its sole occupant has not moved from the computer in five hours.

The printer whirrs and heats up, spitting out scores of beautifully designed posters heralding the new immersive host club experience.

**HOST CLUB RELAUNCH THIS FRIDAY!  
>Theme: American preparatory school<br>Our dear customers are invited to join us in wearing an American prep school-style uniform with creative embellishments to honour our Natural Type Host. The princess who showcases the most beautiful personal touches to her uniform will be rewarded with the first look at photographs of our Haruhi in his new school.  
>The Ouran Host Club will be waiting for you!<strong>

Kaoru will have to wake up extra early tomorrow to sneak to school to put up the posters.

Hikaru has been waking up as late as he can these days, and he takes longer than usual to come downstairs for breakfast. In the past few days it has caused Kaoru no end of grief trying to get them to school on time, but it is exactly what he needs for tomorrow.

He stuffs the posters in his schoolbag hastily and trudges off to bed without dinner.

The night crawls by in a chain of fitful dreams and interrupted sleep.

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><p>.<p>

Kaoru knows that the reason Kyouya always arrives at school at the exact same time every day is because Team Kyouya operates like supernatural clockwork. They speed up and slow down time by quickening and slowing their actions to coordinate with his pace. Kyouya himself is completely heedless of his alarm clocks and wakes up at whatever time he deems fit (or whatever time Tachibana deems fit, really, since Tachibana is the one who has to steel his nerves to wake his uncooperative young master on days that all three alarm clocks are unsuccessful).

From Kaoru's calculations, this day will proceed as in one of 3 most likely scenarios:

1) Shadow King makes his customary one-minute walk from the designated student drop-off zone to the main courtyard where he gives the notice board his customary once-over. Unauthorised poster spotted.  
>Expected time of call: 8:06 am.<br>Prospects of survival: fair.

2) Today is a three-clock day. Aforementioned Shadow King will be grouchier than usual and walk at a dawdling pace, which prolongs the customary walk to two minutes. Notice board is squinted at. Unauthorised poster spotted.  
>Expected time of call: 8:07 am.<br>Prospects of survival: exponentially decreased.

3) Yesterday was a no-sleep night. Said Shadow King will take so long to cross the courtyard that he will be ambushed by the excited queries of fangirls. His sluggish morning mind will struggle to process their questions. It will also hate itself for being confused. Murderous intent will swell palpably.  
>Expected time of call: 8:12 – 8:15 am, depending on how long it takes to fend off the fangirls in order to make the call in private.<br>Prospects of survival: non-existent.

Kaoru is sitting in classroom 2-A counting down the seconds.

"Kaoru! Kaoru!" Hikaru shouts frantically as he charges in. "There you are! You came to school without me? The driver said you left at seven! You – why are you sweating so much? You look so pale! Are you sick?"

His brother must have been really worried about him not to have caught sight of any of the rather conspicuous posters along the way. Seeing him so animated makes Kaoru's world right again.

"Kaoru?" Hikaru jolts him rather harshly. "You're shaking and your skin feels cold! Did something happen? Answer me!" He is scaring his twin badly. Yes, Kaoru should say something. What he wants to say is: if I open my mouth I will throw up on you.

So he brandishes a copy of the poster at his twin as explanation, and watches while the colour drains out of his face.

"You didn't," Hikaru gasps painfully. "You already did?"

Mute nod.

"We need to remove them now! Kill all the people who've already seen them! How many did you put up? How much time do we have? We can do this, we – "

They turn their heads simultaneously to glance at the clock – 8:04:03 am.

Kaoru knows his fate is sealed. Oh, the courage of fools. His only saving grace is the way he has made the design unmistakeably his and his alone, in order not to implicate his brother in this act of treason. Such little value he has attached to his own life! What will happen to his family after his execution by order of the Shadow King? He rues his thoughtlessness about their welfare.

"Hikaru! I love you so much," he wails hysterically at last. "Promise me that we'll still be twins in our next life!"

8:04:15 am. A phone lies innocently on a table. The brothers clutch desperately at each other and stare fearfully at it.

Kaoru feels an incredible affinity with Kyouya's enemies at this moment in time. If he lives to see poor Kuze-senpai another day, he will treat him with the utmost compassion.

But – and here Kaoru nearly faints – even the stupidest of Kyouya's enemies would_ never _dare to call the shots on matters and funds under Kyouya's control! This is something that King Tamaki himself wouldn't be able to get away with. It is unchartered territory Kaoru finds himself in.

8:05 am.

8:06:00 am. Kaoru is just _begging_ his phone to ring.

8:06:01 am. _Please. _

8:06:02 am. It rings! Kaoru's senses are so numb with tension and dead with relief that he does not realise it is the wrong ringtone.

"Hello?" he croaks, hoarse with dread.

Tamaki is hyperventilating at the other end of the line.

Kaoru hangs up immediately. When the Shadow King wants to contact you, you damn well make sure you're contactable.

8:07:29 am. A blond-haired idiot appears in their classroom, rushing at Kaoru as though bidding his final farewell.

This is what he had expected to hear: "Kaoru! Don't be afraid! I will protect you from Okaasan!"

This is what he had expected to feel: imbecility so overpowering that it smothers him.

This is what he actually hears: "Kaoru, don't be afraid. I think Kyouya will feel quite gratified that you made the effort. Truthfully, I think we've all wanted to resume going to club."

This is what he actually feels: warm arms wrapped around him bracingly and a soft voice murmuring in his ear.

Kaoru is flabbergasted. Who is this impostor?

How odd that this person has such a comforting presence when he was yelling incoherently into the phone earlier. What had he been prattling on about anyway? Something something Kyouya, going to something, something Hikaru involved, coming to save you.

_Why would Tono need to come here? Wouldn't a better rescue plan be to intercept Kyouya-senpai before he makes the fateful call? Doesn't the Shadow King usually contact his subjects and minions by phone?_

8:08:00 am. BANG.

The seething dark presence in front of him is wearing a truly terrifying smile.

Swift and unforgiving questions are fired at him instantly. Kaoru has anticipated this. The club must not be perceived as being poorly organised. It is Kyouya's reputation at stake, after all.

"Did you obtain administrative approval for the students to dress in non-school-issue uniform?" Kyouya asks pleasantly.

"Y – Yes, only for the customers that will be coming to club on Friday. The Headmaster says they can change for the activity after the last lesson."

"Will Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai be able to attend?"

"Yes, I checked their timetables. They are free on Friday afternoons." Kyouya's eyes narrow dangerously – of course he would pick up on the implication that Kaoru has not actually asked the senpais for permission for their time. _Well, it's not like I didn't want to_, he protests in his mind, _there wasn't enough time!_

"Did you think about the decorations? What about what the host club is going to wear?" Kyouya's voice is becoming more saccharine with each question that he puts out. A prickly sensation washes over Kaoru's skin, warning him of a trap about to be sprung.

"I have pictures of the interior and exterior of some of these American high schools – we can draw inspiration from them and I'll modify it for the music room. It's quite easy to get suitable uniforms. I know all of your preferred styles so I'll take responsibility for altering them."

Kaoru does not at all like the way Kyouya had perked up at the word "responsibility". Of course he knows how stupid it is to give Kyouya weapons, but he is so intent on emphasising Hikaru's innocence in the hopes that his twin will be spared from retribution.

"How are you going to obtain the photographs from Haruhi?"

"Er, well, I sent her an email asking for photographs." This is an enormous 'if'. Kaoru is prepared to abase himself at Haruhi's feet. Failing which, he will bribe one of his mother's assistants to hunt her down.

"Hmm?" A taunt cloaked in politeness. "Did you think about whether Haruhi is attending her new school as a boy or a girl? Didn't you and Ranka-san mostly pack girl's clothing for her?"

Oh, shit. "Um…"

This is the denouement of Kyouya's plot. He is no longer waiting for answers as he advances on Kaoru. "Did you calculate the costs of such an event? Do you have sufficient knowledge of the club accounts such as to allow you to make such judgements? Did it occur to you that perhaps I may have been using the past two weeks to reconfigure the infrastructure of our club to compensate for Haruhi's absence? Did it occur to you that your interference would be extremely unwelcome?" A pause, and for an instant Kyouya's eyes flash with a ferocious coldness. "Does it occur to you now that you may have completely ruined the plans I had in place?"

Yes, it has indeed occurred to him just now. Kaoru stumbles back, aghast at the enormity of his error.

His mind collapses upon itself in grovelling remorse. He wants to say something – _anything _– to Kyouya to convey how much he had wanted to help and how dear the host club is to him and his twin.

Knowing that Kyouya would be incensed and seeing it in the flesh are two vastly different things. Kyouya has never seemed more inhuman than at this present moment; he is a flawless replica of his father.

There is nothing left to say. In trying to save that which is precious to him, Kaoru has unwittingly destroyed it.

He flees the classroom amidst concerned shouts of his name.

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><p>.<p>

His feet have carried him out of the Academy entirely. He does not remember the route he has taken, nor does he know where he is going.

It transpires that even his feet are smarter than his brain, because they already know where his heart wants to be. He steps through the automatic door and drops into a seat heavily as a buzzing sound signals that the train is leaving the station. He feels absurdly thankful for Tamaki's past insistence that Mei-chan teach them how to use the commoner train system. Using the family car is out of the question because Kaoru's parents would be alerted that he is cutting class, but the distance to his destination is too far.

His phone records 24 missed calls in the 7 minutes it had taken for him to run to the nearest Tokyo Metro station. Guilt and shame are just piling on mercilessly today. Kaoru is very rarely so inconsiderate of his brother's feelings, and he is sure that Hikaru must be going out of his mind with worry. He sends a reply message asking Hikaru not to be upset and to stay in school.

He swiftly becomes aware of the disapproving stares of the commuters sitting across him. The esteemed Ouran uniform is drawing too much attention and he has no resources at his disposal to disguise himself. Thankfully, in no time at all, the train begins to slow as it approaches his intended stop. Kaoru thinks that the commoners really should be given some credit for their efficiency with time. He hurries off the train and disappears into the crowd before someone decides to call up the Academy to report him.

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><p>.<p>

Kaoru rips through the Ouran University campus located on the opposite side of the city, his lungs burning with the hope that sheer dumb luck will guide him in his search for a certain blond technology student.

He has been looking for what seems like forever. The buildings in the Faculty of Science and Technology offer no guarantee as the students have their own individual timetables and can move wherever they like, meeting with old friends in common areas and working in laboratories and studying in libraries and chatting in spare classrooms and eating on the lawns under the sun and –

Kaoru is going mad.

He is struggling to hold back his tears so as not to make a scene. It is bad enough that a high school student is wandering around in university grounds.

People are turning to gawk as he flies past them. He does not know what it is they see in his face – some of them are yelling at him to stop, some of them are trying to grab him in his frenzied run, a lot of them are asking if he is all right...

In the end, instead of finding the person, the person finds him.

"Kao-chan?" a sweet, unmistakeable voice calls out.

Kaoru whips his head around with dizzying speed. He is unable to breathe. He gasps again and again at the air; light-headedness sets in and he sways on the spot.

Honey is coming towards him with outstretched arms, a horrified expression on his face. Kaoru throws himself at his senpai and clutches at him in anguish as his knees crumple and his head falls uselessly against Honey's chest.

The students congregated in the grassy plaza are held in a state of stunned silence as Mori shields Kaoru from view and carries him away from the curious onlookers.

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><p>.<p>

Kaoru keeps his eyes clenched shut and face pressed against Mori's cardigan. Mori's embrace feels exceptionally gentle and safe; this is the sanctuary offered by the Morinozukas and Kaoru is experiencing the peace that the Haninozukas usually derive from it. While the senpais' form of attachment varies distinctly from the bond that he shares with Hikaru, there exist undeniable similarities that he recognises instinctively – that depth of feeling, that transcendent love.

He is set down on a surface, but Mori surprisingly does not pull away. In normal circumstances Kaoru would feel abashed, but after the torturous night he spent on tenterhooks, he is so fatigued that if he is no longer supported he will surely keel over.

It takes him a moment before he realises that Honey has been holding his hands tenderly for an indeterminate period of time.

Kaoru's heart _glows_ in the presence of their friendship. His senpais are so unequivocal in their generosity, so truly beyond compare. He is intensely touched and afraid all at once and choking on his sobs before he knows it.

This is what he cannot lose. This is what he was trying to save. Having had his world expanded to include such amazing people, how can he ever bear to let them leave? For the first time he senses deeply that he will not survive a disintegration of the host club.

He is seventeen and head over heels in love with his pumpkin story.

Maybe the rest of them will all have the strength to move on. Kaoru doesn't think that he can be that hard-hearted. He sees a higher probability of him becoming a half-being that lives through Hikaru. Eventually, he would be nothing more than a parasitic burden that must either sap the life out of his brother or choose to end his dependency, which would kill him in the process.

Kaoru is _just not good _at being alone.

It is a long time before the feelings subside enough for him to speak.

"H-Honey-senpai," he hiccups, "I did something really, really stupid."

Honey nods encouragingly at him to continue.

"Since Haruhi left, the club hasn't opened at all. I – I thought Kyouya-senpai was – I wanted – I made a really rash decision and announced the relaunch of the host club without Kyouya-senpai's permission."

He feels rather than sees Mori and Honey share a look.

"Oh, Kao-chan," Honey sighs. "Was Kyou-chan livid?"

Kaoru laughs brokenly in reply. "I only wanted to help. I wanted the club to start up again!"

"Hnn," says Mori seriously, "You didn't just want to help. If all you wanted to do was help, you should have asked Kyouya. What's the real reason you bypassed Kyouya's authority?"

Kaoru nearly falls off the – table, that's what he's sitting on – in his incredulity. "You think I set out to _antagonise _Kyouya-senpai?"

"Kaoru." This is the voice that Satoshi uses to discipline Yasuchika. "Answer the question."

Kaoru is beginning to think that this is the second big mistake of the day. Something of his intention to escape must have shown in his eyes, because Mori grasps his hips in such a way as to fasten him by his side.

Staying silent is a ludicrous strategy against Mori, but all things considered, a waiting game does not seem a bad idea as he gathers his thoughts.

The metronome beats of the clock on the wall are obscenely loud.

After a while, Honey quips, "Takashi has infinitely more patience than you do, Kao-chan."

To think that less than a second ago Kaoru had been so appreciative of how brilliant his senpais can be. "Hikaru has been so lifeless these past few weeks. I thought if I publicised the return of the host club then Kyouya-senpai would have no choice but to reopen and Hikaru would have something to do again."

Honey and Mori both give him a rather stern look. "I believe that you wanted to give Kyou-chan no choice, but you're still lying about everything else. You didn't do it for Hika-chan."

Kaoru is ashamed to tell them of his speculation, but they are clearly refusing to accept anything less than the truth. "I thought we haven't had club for so long because – I thought it meant that Kyouya-senpai was really affected by Haruhi's going away," he confesses.

"Aa." Mori's tone sounds a little too knowing.

Saying it aloud makes the illogicality of his thought process so very obvious. _Kyouya_, overcome to the point of inaction? Kaoru sees now the insult implied in his actions. It is not so much that he had disrespected Kyouya's jurisdiction over club matters than because he had insinuated that Kyouya had become incapable of dealing with the facts of life. Was _that_ why Kyouya had been that furious?

"Why would you think that about Kyou-chan?" Honey asks.

He cannot meet their eyes. "Remember when Tono first moved into the main house? That day I was with Kyouya-senpai, and he said some things that made me realise that he had been expecting the host club to end once Tono discovers his feelings for Haruhi. But nothing happened the way he imagined, and Kyouya-senpai said he decided to stop thinking that we would end soon! He was starting to have faith in us, and then Haruhi leaves a big hole in the club! I don't want Kyouya-senpai to always be waiting for us to end!"

What Kaoru also means is: _I don't ever want us to end. _

But that unspoken prayer is so inextricably tangled up with his vulnerability that it cuts him to the quick, and he doesn't want them to know anything of it. So he promptly says, "I didn't even ask Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai if you have time for club this Friday! I'm so sorry!"

Kaoru really is contrite about not showing them this basic courtesy. More than anyone else in the club, the two senpais provide wisdom and a sense of perspective. Likely they would have foreseen the repercussions of this course of action and advised Kaoru against taking it. A fresh wave of tears cascades down Kaoru's cheeks as he bows in apology and regret.

Small hands cradle his head gently as they dab a tissue across the tear streaks. "Kao-chan, is Kyou-chan the only reason?"

_Ugh._ They are persistently defeating his attempts to change the topic. The way Honey is watching him tells him that Honey already knows the answer. Kaoru fidgets and averts his gaze, discomfited at his senpai's insistence on discussing Kaoru's agenda.

"There's – there's no other reason! I missed the fun we always have in the club. I was thinking only of myself," Kaoru says meekly. "Hikaru and I have been really bored lately without Haruhi, and I wanted a distraction." This is not wholly false – classes have become intolerably dull – but the half-truth assaults his conscience.

His senpais exchange another loaded glance.

It crosses his mind that he should leave since he is holding back from confiding in them honestly. He has already exhibited completely preposterous behaviour, having run all the way here to impose on them and in the process causing a lot of people to worry. He should not harass them any longer.

Springing to his feet, he mumbles vague excuses as he brushes his clothes down carelessly. At least the club will have to open this Friday because Kyouya will not permit a retraction. Kaoru has accomplished a tiny part of what he had set out to do. From now on, he will just have to find a way to salvage his relationship with Kyouya. His mind made up, he scrambles towards the door with his gaze glued to the ground.

"It's okay to admit you're scared of losing us," Mori says before Kaoru can so much as make it halfway to the exit. "Don't hide behind the cover of selfishness. That's not what motivated you."

Honey and Mori's eyes strip Kaoru of all pretence; his fear and loneliness are laid bare before them.

"You thought that we were drifting apart, and you wanted to force all of us to stay together until Haru-chan comes back, ne, Kao-chan?"

Kaoru almost laughs – in all likelihood, they had figured everything out before this conversation even began._ I was afraid that we were coming to an end, _he thinks, pleads. _Please don't leave me behind._

He keeps his back against them and lets his bangs fall over his eyes as he takes several deep breaths. "I... I assumed that Kyouya-senpai didn't restart the club because Haruhi's leaving disturbed him too. All of us haven't talked to each other in nearly 2 weeks! I was afraid no one cared about the host club anymore. But Kyouya-senpai certainly has no compunctions about moving on with his life with his brilliant plans," he finishes bitterly.

He had been so frightened by the idea of a Kyouya who could become stymied by common human emotions that he had failed to imagine how indescribably worse it would feel to discover a Kyouya who is totally unaffected and indifferent.

"Kao-chan, come back here," Honey sighs, patting the vacant space beside Mori. Stalking out of the room in defiance seems childish, but when Kaoru walks back and plops himself on the table, his entire attitude resembles that of a sullen child anyway.

"You misunderstand Kyouya," Mori says in a slightly reproachful tone. "If the club really is that important to him, then he will make sure it never falls apart."

"Yes, I should have known that. I should have known that Kyouya-senpai would protect the club, and now I've gone and messed with his plans," Kaoru mumbles.

At this, Mori turns to look at Honey. Mori's expression is as stoic as usual, but Kaoru cannot shake the feeling that there had been a question posed and answered, and that Mori is feeling distinctly amused.

"Senpais, what do I do now? How can I make it up to Kyouya-senpai?" Kaoru cries.

"First, do you understand why Kyouya was upset?" Mori asks him solemnly.

"Because... by doing what I did, I was implying that I think that Kyouya-senpai is not as infallible as he imagines? It annoyed Kyouya-senpai because he actually is that infallible. He was making arrangements for a new host club when I was a total wreck! Wow, he must really have a huge ego to be so offended by my misinterpretation."

Mori makes an odd 'hnn' sound that would resemble stifled laughter to Kaoru's mind if there had been anything remotely funny about what Kaoru had said.

"Kao-chan," Honey says, his voice also curiously infused with mirth, "Kyou-chan wasn't offended by your misinterpretation."

"Then – why was he upset?" Kaoru shudders to think of what other transgressions he could have obliviously committed against Kyouya.

"He was very offended by your interpretation," Mori replies, and Honey starts giggling.

Kaoru is utterly confused now, and his senpais appear to be enjoying themselves far more than the situation warrants.

"That doesn't explain anything at all!" Kaoru exclaims.

"It does, Kao-chan." Honey smiles, his eyes glittering. "Like I said to Hika-chan, I still think that Kyou-chan is the one who treasures the host club most of all. So Kyou-chan thinks that he should be the one to keep it safe. Kyou-chan needs to protect the people and things that he loves."

_What is that supposed to mean?_ _Is he angry that I tried to protect the club instead of letting him do it?_

"Ohhh, I see! Kyouya-senpai is angry because I usurped his position as chief protector of our group?"

"Not entirely because of that," Honey comments, "but close enough. Eheheh."

Kaoru has done something unnecessary, then. There never was any ill-will in his actions; he never intended to replace or challenge Kyouya. He sees now that he really should have kept to himself and let Kyouya do his job. It was not his place to interfere and he knew it.

Any way he looks at it, he owes Kyouya a big fat apology.

"I understand, senpais!" he announces. "I will go and beg Kyouya-senpai for forgiveness!"

"Yes!" Honey agrees. "Kao-chan, do you want to have a late lunch with me? Then you can go over to Kyou-chan's house."

Kaoru starts in surprise. He glances at his watch; it is almost 2:30 pm! Well, even if the school day is not already nearing its end, it would not make sense for him to return because Hikaru most probably told the teachers that he is unwell. His stomach rumbles; an awful hunger smacks into him in retaliation for the missed dinner yesterday and the missed breakfast today. Honey's first idea sounds marvellous, but Kaoru is not so sure about the second idea.

"Mm." Mori stands up and gathers his books. "Mitsukuni, remember to listen to the audio lecture this evening or you'll fall behind."

Wait – that means that... "Honey-senpai, you skipped class for me? I'm so sorry! Mori-senpai, did you skip class too?"

"It's all right, Kao-chan. My lecturer tapes her lectures and they are all available on the university website. Takashi has no classes until, well, two thirty."

The realisation hits him like a ton of bricks. They had unreservedly spent the entire morning with him because he needed them, even though it means that Mori will have to forego lunch.

Kaoru's breath catches in his throat again – he feels so much _adoration _for them that he cannot stop the tears from spilling over.

"Kao-chan!" Honey squeaks with dismay as he envelops Kaoru in a hug. "Didn't I say it's all right?"

Mori ruffles his hair with his large, warm hand and gives him a rare smile.

At this rate, Kaoru is never going to be able to stop crying.

He does not know how they manage it, but eventually his tears are wiped and his clothes straightened. Mori had given him his bright yellow cardigan to wear over his Ouran summer shirt before leaving for the lecture.

Honey is holding his hand and leading him to the campus cafeteria.

"You know," Honey begins, "Takashi thinks that Kyou-chan himself doesn't exactly know why he is so irked by your actions."

More and more Kaoru is getting the feeling that his senpais' minds are telepathically connected, and that they are omniscient.

"So when you go to apologise to Kyou-chan, you must be very careful with what you say, ne? Try to choose your words exactly so that they convey what you actually mean. Takashi doesn't want the both of you to become hurt over pointless misunderstandings."

Mori is always so responsible. While Kaoru knows that some girls like the silent types, he had not previously understood why people would designate a host who essentially sits there without engaging them. Since Kaoru and Hikaru were born to entertain, they are naturally biased in favour of showy, theatrical antics.

Kaoru knows better now. Never before has he been so acutely aware of Mori's charm. It has nothing to do with a 'lovely item' and everything to do with his aura – Mori emanates otherworldly devotion and chivalry. His character is altogether unimpeachable, and his honourable actions rather than his expressions attest to the person he truly is.

"Thereafter, just let Kyou-chan come up with his plans without any meddling, okay?"

Ouch. "Yes, Honey-senpai," he says resignedly. _Eh? Wait, huh?_ "Come up with plans?"

"Oh, did I say 'come up'? I meant to say 'carry out'," Honey corrects himself airily.

"Honey-kun!" several girls call out. "Why weren't you at the lecture today? Is everything all right?"

Kaoru's senpais are still as popular as ever in university. Everyone crowds around Honey attentively, helpfully offering to lend their notes to Honey and proposing group study sessions. Kaoru finds himself smiling fondly at this typical sight played out by a mix of old schoolmates and strange new people.

It takes a while to extricate themselves, as usual. They continue to be accosted by various people on what had been alleged to be a short walk. Kaoru doesn't mind though – his head clears as he is confronted by the unceasing kindness and exuberance of Honey's associates.

When they finally sit down for lunch, at least 20 people have promised to keep an eye out for him if he comes to this university, and at least 40 people have offered to bring some food to Mori.

"See, Kao-chan? Takashi will get to eat something after all. Stop feeling bad about it."

Kaoru can only laugh helplessly. He thinks that Mori will end up with way too much food. His spirits are so much lighter now; Honey's joy is so irresistibly infectious.

"Takashi does this sometimes. He knows that he must take care of himself in order to care for other people, but occasionally he forgets about himself." There is an undercurrent of an unidentifiable emotion behind this statement, so he sends a puzzled glance towards Honey.

"People like Takashi need to protect other people," Honey declares.

Kaoru nods, intrigued. "I know that, Honey-senpai."

"And the way we protect these protectors is to give them something or someone to protect, Kao-chan." If it was any other person sporting the expression currently on Honey's face, Kaoru would have called it guile.

Before Kaoru can ask for further elaboration, a swarm of Honey's friends decides to join them at their table, effectively preventing them from addressing these personal topics. Try as he might, he cannot banish the insidious suspicion that even without their intrusion, Honey would not have offered any clarification anyway. There is something that Mori and Honey are not telling him, either because he should not know about it, or – more likely than not – because they want him to find out for himself.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

_Continued in Part B_


	3. Chapter 1B

**CHAPTER ONE(B)**

**Starting Today, You are an Intern!**

.

Kaoru had stayed longer than he had intended, and it is well after school time when he calls for his car, the upside being that his unusual location does not immediately lead to an inference of truancy.

He knows that Honey is expecting him to go to Kyouya's house. The thought makes his stomach twist with dread. He supposes that a lifetime of strict discipline in the martial arts has led to a form of straightforwardness in both Honey and Mori – he has never known them to put off what needs to be done, and they invariably prefer to tackle problems without delay.

Kaoru has had a lifetime of discipline in the creative arts, thriving on the capricious nature of inspiration and the soaring flights of imagination. He and Kyouya are 'wait-and-watchers', accustomed to a great deal of work behind the scenes in preparation for one shining moment of triumph.

As things go, the driver is directed to make for the Ootori mansion because Kaoru's instincts are to blame for his current regrettable predicament. He thinks it only fair that he embrace Honey and Mori's way of life at this critical juncture.

It is remarkable how much the journey feels like one to the gallows.

He hugs his knees and pillows his head in his arms, wrapping himself in a smell that is clean and fresh – it is familiar to him though he is not usually in such intimate proximity with it. Mori's simple sunshine yellow cardigan is exemplary of understated luxury. Kaoru runs his hand over the smooth, light Egyptian cotton; the fibres are so close together as to be indistinguishable to the eye. It is everything Mori is: soft and comforting, durable and strong. Only the surprising choice of colour seems incongruent, but it reflects a great deal of summer spirit and besides, Mori carried it off splendidly.

Kaoru loves the feel of fabric against his bare skin. The use of textures to evoke the senses was their first lesson from their mother. Even touching Hikaru is like caressing a superior cloth, one whose silky feel makes his hands crave contact, makes his hands refuse to pull away. When they were younger, there were many times when Hikaru found it difficult to sleep. They would face each other in bed, and Kaoru would glide his fingers over Hikaru's arm – over and over and over again – until his twin's breathing slowed with sleep.

Their second lesson was colour, third was cut, fourth was shape... In an industry such as this, the lessons will never end but the basics will always remain true.

This feel, this smell, this quintessential Mori-ness – it is devastatingly easy to get used to. It has a calming effect that anchors him despite his building anxiety.

Kaoru must think! What will he say to Kyouya in mitigation? How will he know if he is using the right words?

As he mulls upon what his senpais have said, he becomes fairly convinced that they had endeavoured to equip him with the necessary insights to engage Kyouya. He wonders if Honey was implying that Kyouya has the heart of a protector like Mori.

The car plunges into severe shadows cast by the late afternoon sun as it pulls up in front of the extremely minimalistic house. 'House' is the appropriate word for a residence so bereft of warmth. It reflects the personalities of its members within, just like the rest of the host club members have houses that stand testament to their heritage – Kaoru's own home is flamboyant and opulent, Tamaki's home is aristocratic and ornate, Honey's home is noble and welcoming, Mori's home is traditional and dignified, and Haruhi's home is just… uh, neat and plebeian.

When he knocks, it is Team Kyouya that opens the door instead of the regular household staff. This perplexes him, especially since he gets the impression that there are fewer servants about than usual despite the fact that Ootori servants always keep themselves out of sight, unnoticeable until such time as they are needed. It's all very shady in this household.

He inquires about this to procrastinate his meeting with Kyouya, and is privately informed that all the servants have conspired to adjust their shifts to allow everyone half a day off. These canny servants are exploiting the fact that Ootori-sama is on an overseas trip, knowing that their Kyouya-sama will turn a blind eye and their Akito-sama will probably be too occupied with work.

Sneakiness seems to run in his household; there must be something in the water. Kaoru is trying valiantly to contain his laughter, and he needs to get out of Hotta's presence before it explodes out of him.

"Hotta," Kaoru says in a strained voice, "I can handle it from here."

Without waiting for Hotta to react, he darts down the corridor and turns the corner, his shoulders beginning to shake involuntarily with repressed laughter.

It is good that he managed to ditch his assigned escort, because his courage fails him when he arrives at Kyouya's door. A trench is being steadily gouged into the floor by his pacing. Numerous speeches are composed and discarded in his head.

He hears muffled speech growing louder and clearer. Could it be that Kyouya is not in his room? Kaoru turns over to ascertain the source of the voice – there is a figure stalking down the hallway towards him while talking on a phone.

It is Akito! Kaoru grasps the handle to the nearest door and scampers in to hide as stealthily as possible, pressing his ear against said door to listen for Akito's movements.

Footsteps fade off into the distance. Kaoru slides to the floor and scrunches up in relief. He would not like to be interrogated by Akito when his mind already resembles scrambled eggs. There would be a very real danger of him doing something that would infuriate Kyouya further, like... _barging into his room without permission._

Kaoru would have screamed but for his throat locking up in unadulterated horror. Thank heavens for small mercies. Small mercies like having had the fortune to enter the room silently, having Kyouya be on the upper floor, having substantial background noise.

"Kyouyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" whines a supremely annoying voice. "You've been at your laptop since you've been home! Didn't you agree to let me help?"

"How else do you imagine the preparations for this Friday's host club are going to be made? You were causing more problems than you were solving," a cool voice retorts rather huffily. "I'll have to organise the whole event with less than half the amount of time I usually have."

The concealed little ball that is Kaoru twitches in response.

A vexed expulsion of breath. "I should have gone to sleep last night."

Tamaki laughs. "That'll teach you, Okaasan. If sleep is so important to you, why don't you go to bed earlier instead? Your skin rejuvenates itself during sleep!"

Kaoru listens in stunned disbelief. The Low Blood Pressure Evil Lord that had moved at an unearthly speed this morning had not slept at all? The awesome power of his fury! The more Kaoru discovers about Kyouya's habits, the more he feels blessed to be alive.

"Because my priorities are: work first, sleep second, then everything else including _vanity_," comes the dry reply.

"How can beauty be ranked so lowly when you are a host?" screeches Tamaki, appalled.

Kyouya does not dignify the question with an acknowledgement. _Tap tap tap._

Kaoru predicts that Tamaki will raise his voice after a period of being ignored. He tenses up in readiness to hotfoot it out of the Shadow King's lair as soon as Tamaki smashes the tranquillity in the room.

_Tap tap tap._

_Tap tap tap._

Kaoru squirms at the protracted silence._ Say something, Tono!_

"Nekozawa-senpai called me this morning to say that a high school student was running madly through their university," Tamaki states abruptly.

Kaoru topples over in shock. Luckily, he is nimble enough not to make noise.

"I'm glad to hear that you've overcome your irrational fear of him. Absence has indeed made your heart fonder." Kyouya does not even miss a beat.

"Kyouya."

The rapid tapping ceases.

There is a peculiar atmosphere in the room, one that Kaoru has never encountered before. Kaoru wishes he can see what is going on.

"I'm really relieved that somebody cared enough about the host club to bother doing something about it, Okaasan. I was thinking about Haruhi so much over the past few days, I think I neglected everyone else. Aren't you relieved too?"

Kyouya makes a non-committal humming sound and resumes typing. That mysterious moment had come and gone in a flash.

Kaoru must subconsciously have a death wish because he begins to crawl surreptitiously towards the staircase, fuelled by insatiable curiosity and a conviction that whatever is going on is worth investigating. His escape plans lie entirely abandoned.

"I thought you would be the one to do it."

Dead silence.

Kaoru freezes in an awkward position and holds his breath.

"Well," – papers are rustled – "all members have a vested interest in being part of an extracurricular club, which entitles them to take action to have it restored. I don't see why it has to be me."

_This guy..._ Kaoru can hardly believe his cheek. _Why was he so angry then?_

"Why were you so angry at Kaoru then?"

Kaoru cheers mentally. _Go Tono!_

"It was irresponsible of him to make those decisions without proper accounting," Kyouya replies smoothly. That voice can gloss over all manner of sins.

"Really, Kyouya? Wasn't it because Kaoru was right about you?"

Tamaki sounds utterly unrecognisable. Kaoru falters, remembering the embrace he received earlier in the day. _Right about Kyouya-senpai?_ _Right about what? Wasn't my guess thoroughly offensive?_

Kaoru reaches the foot of the stairs. Now to ascend them – the great advantage of an extended childhood is the gaining of heightened agility, mobility and flexibility through frequent play. Hikaru and Kaoru's childhoods are still well underway, actually.

"Right about me visiting vengeance upon him? How correct he is."

Kaoru nearly loses his grip. _Oh, what a malicious jerk._

He is approaching the top of the flight of stairs. Here he faces the most perilous part of his adventure: he must inch his head upwards so that it will be sufficiently raised to catch a glimpse of the two boys, but not so much that he catches their attention instead. He must do this while perched precariously on the steps, his body plastered to the handrails on one side.

"Kyouya, I know you haven't made preparations for the club at all."

The air suddenly becomes close and thick.

Kaoru's lungs are dying from having to hide his exertions but now more than ever he knows it is imperative that he grasp the nuances of what is happening. He was too late and too ignorant about the Tamaki debacle, and he will not allow another dissolution of the club to happen again.

"Just because Hikaru and I are in love with Haruhi and the senpais are off at university doesn't mean that we're not going to come back to the club. Did you think that Haruhi's going away means that none of us will be interested anymore?"

It takes all of Kaoru's willpower not to suck in his next breath sharply. He concentrates purposefully on regulating his breathing and heaves himself upwards – Tamaki and Kyouya come into view.

"That is your speculation. I have other commitments in my life apart from your club, many of which are more pressing."

"Then why aren't you happy that Kaoru offered to take responsibility?"

Kyouya is sitting on his bed with his gaze lowered to his laptop, surrounded by stacks of papers and facing away from Kaoru. His back is stiff and proudly straight, but it gives him a look of brittleness rather than of strength. And Tamaki...

Tamaki looks like he is made of light.

"Because responsibility is not what he wanted. He was merely trying to force my hand, having deduced that the detrimental effects of appearing indecisive and therefore incompetent would prevent me from rescinding his announcement. Do you think he really considered what this 'responsibility' would entail? Do you imagine he contemplated the work that goes into a single cosplay session? He has saddled me with a colossal project based on his own selfish desires. Initiative without ability is useless." Kyouya's words are scathing but his tone is completely emotionless. His analysis indicts Kaoru with its truth. Kaoru has, in point of fact, not given much thought to the aftermath of trying to play Kyouya into resurrecting the club.

Kaoru sees Tamaki edge towards Kyouya, his knees uncaring of the paper on the sheets. He tilts Kyouya's head upwards to rest his forehead tenderly against Kyouya's, and Kyouya lets him.

"I'll help, Okaasan," whispers the most velvety voice Kaoru has ever heard.

They stay like that, eyes closed, suspended in timelessness.

"It's all right to be affected by her leaving. All of us are. She's part of the club we love, right? But we're not going to fall apart just because one piece is taken away for a short time."

Kaoru is trespassing on something precious, but he cannot look away. Tamaki is incandescent and Kyouya is not immune. Their King drags all of their insecurities out from the deep, dark recesses of their minds; he has always insisted on doing this, as though the presence of light is the cure, as though _he_ is the cure.

Such conceit! Such unmitigated conceit! What gives him the right to be so pushy, to be so fearless, to be so _selfless_, to weather their storms for them, to appoint himself as their shield? What gives him the right to love them?

Kaoru feels so hostile towards Tamaki all at once, so galled and so, so hopelessly… hypnotised.

He sees in Tamaki's radiant face a revelation: that Tamaki loves all of them far more than any of them ever loved him. So purely, so intensely, so unconditionally, so stupidly.

Tamaki wants them as they are, glorious and inglorious.

And Kyouya knows this. Kaoru can see that Kyouya knows this. This is why perfect Kyouya is held spellbound by someone universally acknowledged to be idiotic. This is why Kyouya consents to be made imperfect.

Kaoru has somehow managed to overlook Tamaki as a pivotal factor; he has not included Tamaki's importance in his calculations. Tamaki should have been his ally from the beginning, not someone to clean up the mess. The maturity is astonishing to behold.

This is the first time that Kaoru has ever been able to imagine someone like Tamaki running the Suoh Empire.

He knows now, with the sort of explosive clarity gained from the illuminating presence of this force majeure, that Tamaki _will be_ running the empire.

Kaoru can also see that this is a conclusion Kyouya has long since arrived at. Softness has seeped into Kyouya's posture, reacting to Tamaki's heart of gold, Tamaki's piercing insight, Tamaki's complex simplicity, Tamaki, Tamaki, _Tamaki_.

The two senpais in front of him know the truth of each other, and they are dazzled by that truth.

Kaoru is so engrossed in his awe that he does not catch what Kyouya says to Tamaki. Tamaki's eyes sparkle and he bites his bottom lip, but a smile has already crept up inexorably.

The pressure in Kaoru's chest makes him drop his head down onto the cool surface of the step. He does not lift it again at the mention of his name.

"What happened to Kaoru in the end?"

"After Nekozawa-senpai called, I called Mori-senpai to tell him that Kaoru was searching for them."

"I see."

"He's in safe hands," assures Tamaki.

Kaoru is taken aback at how much he has not noticed, even though he considers himself the observant twin. So that's why his senpais happened to be together despite being in different faculties and having different timetables, and that's how they found him. It had not occurred to Kaoru to question their togetherness, since it is inconceivable that they can be apart.

"What are we going to do now?"

"Make the best of the situation, of course." Kyouya is back to his old self. Or – perhaps more accurately – back to his façade.

"Kyouya, I think we should call Kaoru to help for real, especially since he came up with the idea."

A dark chuckle resonates across the room. "Such an audacious idea it is. He wants the _customers_ to cosplay with us. Are you aware that our kouhai is gambling on the chance that we will feel duty-bound to help him rather than leave him to his devices for making this decision unilaterally? We should hang him out to dry."

"Don't misdirect your anger at him, Kyouya," Tamaki chides quietly. "Although I did think you would be the one to reconvene the club, I don't think any less of you for not doing it."

"It's not sustainable for the customers to cosplay with us. We have storage rooms and procedures to manage our costumes. The customers will be left on their own to find a room in which they can change. Unhealthy competition may be encouraged amongst the girls; there is a high probability that repeated dressing up will result in excessive expenditure and neglected studies. The focus will be taken away from the hosts and transferred to a contest of fashion," Kyouya rejoins testily.

"Kaoru _is _fashion-minded," Tamaki snorts. "I like his idea. It allows our customers to play out the fantasy American school life. A lot of them will have heard stories from their parents and their overseas acquaintances, and they can show off their clothes and rare accessories by customising a basic school uniform. It's meaningful, too – our Haruhi will be living in this type of school environment – that's why he chose this theme, isn't it?"

Tamaki is currently his favourite person in the whole wide world, apart from Hikaru, Honey-senpai, and Mori-senpai. Kaoru is pleased that Tamaki has deconstructed his theme in exactly the way he intended.

Kyouya and Tamaki's conversation degenerates into the mind-numbing process of hashing out the finer details to allow Kaoru's idea to work. Kaoru had thought that Tamaki would be unsuited to this mundane task, being usually the original troublemaker who needs Kyouya to dissect his semi-coherent ideas to rebuild them into a comprehensible whole.

He is appallingly wrong about Tamaki. He had thought that Tamaki's enthusiasm for the nitty-gritty of club operations was to impress his grandmother when she had enforced that strict study regime on him. When Tamaki had been permitted to return to the host club, his need to impress his grandmother should have faded, and the full burden could very well have fallen on Kyouya's shoulders again.

Hearing him now, overflowing with genuine passion and motivated from within, Kaoru knows that Tamaki himself has realised that the Suoh Empire is within his grasp, and has become determined to fight for his legacy.

He had not realised that they were all growing up and stepping into their brave new worlds. Haruhi had seen this Tamaki before him, had understood what Tamaki's choice had meant, and had herself decided to pursue her own interests fearlessly.

It dawns on Kaoru that in this one day alone, he has learnt more about all the host club members and their relationships with each other than he has in his two years of hosting with them.

Somebody is talking about him again.

" – design aspects of the room. It doesn't matter if you think that he's not ready for the responsibility. He did ask to help, didn't he? We should let him try! We shouldn't let him get away with making promises like that. That'll only make him less responsible, Kaasan."

"Remember when you first asked to help as well?" Kyouya deadpans. "You were thoroughly counterproductive even though you genuinely wanted to become involved. Kaoru doesn't even have the heart."

"But Kaoru definitely has more acumen than me. I know it."

Kyouya's voice contains a disgruntled frown. "I highly doubt it. He and his twin like being children. You shouldn't discount yourself, Tousan. What you lacked in skill you more than made up for in vigour."

"I still think –"

"And you were not particularly lacking in skill, either."

Tamaki's happiness swells to fill the room. There is the sound of papers flying, and the dull thud of a body being tackled to the bed. "Oof."

"Really?! You were so harsh sometimes, Kaasan! I thought I was performing really poorly! So you do think I am quite good at it!"

"That's not what I said. You have one second to get off me."

"Kaasan, all the credit is yours! Good teachers produce good stud – "

Kaoru raises his head, alarmed at several thudding noises and an ear-splitting shout.

"Ahahahahahaha! Stop – stop it!" Tamaki howls. "Kaa – kaa – stop – please! Ahahahaha! Help!"

An opportunity to escape has presented itself, and Kaoru seizes it.

They do not divert their attention from each other even when he pulls himself to his feet and pads to the door.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

One thing has been made unambiguous: this is not the time to talk to Kyouya.

A massive migraine is raging in Kaoru's head as he straggles down the hallway in the Ootori house. All he wants is to go home to Hikaru before he doubles over and dies here. Suspicion will be cast on Kyouya for murdering him, and the inconvenience to Kyouya would be considerable.

People in the prime of health would have difficulty facing Kyouya without him being ill-disposed towards them, and Kyouya is very ill-disposed towards Kaoru indeed.

It does not, however, mean that coming here was a mistake. Quite the contrary – Mori's and Honey's advice have proved to be utterly first-rate. Kaoru has always thought highly of his senpais; that opinion has skyrocketed out of control.

What he needs now is time to process and analyse his discovery.

To attain a triumphant getaway, Kaoru must first overcome the obstacle of Team Kyouya. They know that he is here, and long experience has taught them that Kyouya generally walks his friends out and bids them goodbye at the door. The absence of their young master will be conspicuous, and although Kaoru does not have a mirror handy, he surmises that his complexion is probably ashy grey at the moment.

Ootori staff are nothing if not sagacious. This deviation from the norm will put them on high alert – Kyouya will be notified and Kaoru will be finished.

An idea strikes him – another one of his brilliant ideas – that has all the potential in the world to land him in trouble.

He takes a moment to compose himself – the tears that have been threatening persistently are allowed to fall, tension is allowed to fill his body, the trauma of this wretched day is allowed to come through in his eyes.

"Hotta, Hotta," he bemoans in the most tormented voice he can muster as he dashes into the household staff's living space.

Hotta and Aijima jerk in surprise. Kaoru has stepped into their territory; he is skating on thin ice. Some household staffs, Kaoru knows, are extremely averse to their employers crossing the social boundaries into their domain. By all appearances the Ootori staff is composed of businesslike and strait-laced people who observe the rules of propriety fastidiously, which more likely than not means that Kaoru's current intrusion is loathsome to them. Hopefully Kaoru's age will gain him some concessions should his charade go wrong.

Poor Hotta looks really anxious, while Aijima has a poker face to rival Kyouya's.

"K – Kaoru-sama!" Hotta stutters.

He turns Honey's patented googly eyes on them. "I can't do it!"

Aijima is vertical in a split second. "I'm sorry, Kaoru-sama. Did you call without receiving an answer? I will check that the bell is functioning properly. What is it that you cannot do? We'll do it for you at once."

_Wow._ Kaoru blinks dazedly.

"No, I'm sure the bell is working just fine!" he hurries to say. "It's just... I..."

The rest of his sentence trails off into an incomprehensible jumble.

"Excuse us, Kaoru-sama. Could you repeat that last part?"

Kaoru estimates that a reluctant silence should be inserted here. One second, two seconds...

"Kaoru-sama?" Hotta prompts.

"I offended Kyouya-senpai today so I wanted to apologise, but I'm too scared to go into his room!" Kaoru bursts out.

The act is dangerously close to reality. The tremors coursing through Kaoru's body certainly feel real.

"Calm down," Aijima says gravely. "Hotta, prepare some tea for Kaoru-sama," he commands as he guides Kaoru to a seat and fetches some hot towels and sweets.

"Yes!" Hotta springs into action.

Kaoru has to remind himself to concentrate on looking despondent. It is amazing, the speed and efficiency of this team. The Hitachiin staff is ingenious and lively, but they simply do not have this kind of military precision.

It appears that the commotion has attracted Tachibana to the scene. Kaoru wonders whether Tachibana will have him thrown out. Not physically, of course – Tachibana's sense of decorum is well-instilled – but if Tachibana makes known his opposition to Kaoru's presence, the others will follow his lead.

Tachibana knows better than to scrutinise him openly, but Kaoru can just about hear the cogs in Tachibana's mind whirring and wheeling all the same.

The sweets are wonderfully sugary. They must not have been meant for Kyouya. Kaoru helps himself generously, nibbling on them to take the edge off his nervousness. He suspects that some of these may be the products of Fuyumi's and Tamaki's commoner food tour. The sugar rush makes him even more lightheaded, but he no longer feels like throwing up.

"Kaoru-sama," Tachibana acknowledges him respectfully. "It is common to be affected by a range of negative emotions when Kyouya-sama is displeased at your behaviour."

_What?_ Kaoru pauses mid-bite into an ichigo daifuku.

"Meditation techniques will help your peace of mind when you find yourself dithering outside Kyouya-sama's room."

"If you feel unprepared, it is acceptable to go away for as long as you need to regain your composure," Aijima chips in compassionately.

_Why do these people sound so experienced?!_

Horror and humour battle fiercely for dominance inside Kaoru's mind. His intention was to play up his discomfort in order to gain their sympathy, but what he has in fact gained is their _empathy_.

"The best time to apologise to Kyouya-sama is during the evening, when he has a full stomach and before he starts on his work."

_Should I be writing this down? _

"Yes," Aijima concurs, "Kyouya-sama prefers apologies to be short and direct, and he expects you to know what you are apologising for. The young master has no patience for people who waffle on."

"Kyouya-sama's levels of stress differ from day to day. It is better to gauge his mood and choose the best day rather than rushing the apology on a bad day because you want to get it over with."

Aijima and Hotta nod intently at Tachibana's warning.

"If he tells you to go away without actually accepting your apology, don't make the mistake of thinking that all is fine. Paying attention to what Kyouya-sama says is vital," Hotta emphasises helpfully. "If you feed him food that he likes, he will be more receptive, but you mustn't be too obvious about ingratiating yourself with him. If, after you apologise, he –"

"If he says he forgives you, accept it and don't say anything more," Aijima interjects. "If he doesn't, it means there is something else he wants you to do or to understand, so go and find out before apologising again."

"Doing all of this will get you the highest rates of success," Tachibana concludes. "If you fail despite all of your preparations, try and try again."

_These people have it down to an art! _Kaoru presses his lips together and nods attentively. Three intimidating men are standing before him, all but admitting to the number of times that they themselves have gone through the process of chickening out of apologising to Kyouya. His scheme on a whim has worked too well.

"Yes. I – I don't really feel so well," he says pitifully, "I think I should go home and compose a better apology."

"Of course, Kaoru-sama," Tachibana says. "In that case, we will not say anything to Kyouya-sama about your visit."

The whole plan has been right on the mark.

"Really? That's really kind," Kaoru babbles in sincere relief. "That would be really, really helpful. Thank you."

Aijima dips his head in assent. "We'll call your car right away."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Kaoru!"

The instant Kaoru steps out of the car, he is attacked by Hikaru's fierce embrace. Hikaru seizes him and drags him into their home, face full of worry and asking an endless stream of questions.

Hikaru is going to shout at him, he knows it. The questioning will begin with his mental health, his reasons for those ill-fated posters, where he went after he left the school, where he has been since, how he is feeling now, what is he going to do.

Kaoru holds himself answerable to his twin, so he lets Hikaru rant at him and then provides a detailed explanation to the best of his ability. It is terribly late by the time all is said and done, and it is only when Hikaru is tucking himself into their bed that he makes mention of the fact that their mother will be flying back to France in the Cessna before daybreak the next day.

She had come back to spend the weekend with them, having heard that Haruhi had left and guessing that they would be depressed. It occurs to Kaoru only belatedly that cooping himself up in the study for all of Sunday to work on those posters could not have eased her mind about their welfare.

Sensing that Hikaru is already half-asleep, Kaoru exits the room silently in search of his mother. He finds her alone in the atelier, and feels a pang in his heart at how little they have reciprocated her concern for them. It is the first week of September, which means that the first major fashion week is about to kick off the spring/summer season. Their mother is always insanely busy at this time of year, and her presence in France should have been essential. They had not even bothered to acknowledge the gruelling fourteen-hour flight she had made just to see them.

She looks up when she hears him and flashes a grin. "Hello, sweetie. Still awake?"

Kaoru cannot help lowering his head slightly in disgrace.

"Mum, I –" he sighs, "Hikaru and I, we're fine, you know. It's not like we'll never see Haruhi again. And we're really happy she decided to go and broaden her world. I think it's very brave."

"I see." She gives him a motherly smile. "Well, I'm glad you think so. I was becoming very worried –"

"And so I must be brave too!" He places his hands flat on the table, and leans forward eagerly. "Mum, I want to be brave too!"

She looks bewildered at his outburst. "But you are very brave, my Kaoru."

"No," he says sadly, "I haven't even apologised for neglecting you because I was too self-absorbed."

"It's all right, sweetie. There were some last minute things to do here anyway."

Everything about her tone and carriage tells Kaoru that she had known when she had flown home that she would be largely ignored during the weekend, that they would be ill-prepared to confide in her, that they would like her to be present nonetheless – all these hidden needs and wants that Kaoru had not even known he had needed or wanted.

His mother can be so irreverent sometimes that it is easy to forget that she is at the helm of a fashion empire. The woman in front of him now is not just his mother but a master of the family – in times when she chooses to make her authority known, she is no less fearsome than even Ootori Yoshio, no less observant, no less astute about people's complexities, no less precognitive about other people's desires. Kaoru stands there, guilt and admiration clashing disagreeably in his belly.

This has been an _unbelievably_ trying day.

Faced with this image of the ideal that Hikaru and he must become, Kaoru instantly feels sharply insecure about the request he intends to put to his mother – a request that had crystallised in his mind during the ride home. Pure talent and extravagant artistic taste would not insure the survival of their family's business; he needs to look no further than Lacroix as evidence. Their mother has always insisted on owning her own company – nobody owns Hitachiin Yuzuha. If they want to respect their mother's wish, they still have so much to learn and so much unfamiliar responsibility to take on.

Hikaru and Kaoru had not lied when they said that they just do whatever they feel like when Haruhi had commented on how incredibly adult people had to be if they were part of an important family. Haruhi had called them children then.

Children can neither run companies nor survive in the cutthroat fashion industry and the savage corporate world. Friends who behave like children would lose their value to Kyouya, would become burdensome for an overachiever like Haruhi, would be left behind by the New Tamaki, would not be principled like Mori demands his friends to be, and would eventually have nothing left in common with Honey as he prepares himself to ascend as heir.

His commoner best friend has grasped this before him. Despite – or perhaps because of – his privileged birth, Kaoru has never quite appreciated what it truly takes to inherit this legacy. He has taken it for granted, a birthright that the rest of the world is expected to yield to without opposition or objection. Maybe that's why Active Haruhi sometimes causes Kaoru to feel a strange anxiety. The will to achieve is something that all their senpais have; now that Haruhi has joined their ranks, Hikaru and Kaoru have unexpectedly become left out.

Kaoru takes a deep breath. "Mum, I want to become more involved in the company. Please allow me to start learning about the business – I don't mind being in prêt-à-porter or accessories or perfumes or anywhere you want to assign me to."

He does not know how to convey everything he is thinking to his mother. He does not know how to explain why this is suddenly important to him.

He need not have worried.

Her eyes say: _at last._

_._

* * *

><p>.<p>

From: Hitachiin Twins [doubletrouble (a) ouranhostclub . com]  
>To: Fujioka Haruhi [haruhi_tanuki (a) ouranhostclub . com]<br>Subject: Announcing the New Me!  
>Date: Tues, 7 Sep 2010<p>

Our dear Haruhi! ^.^

Please send the photographs quickly to save my life! Wear the clothes that Hikaru and I gave you and pose around your school grounds. We want to see how cute you look in them. Can you try to make yourself look like a boy for some of the photos so that we can show the host club customers? We can tell you how to make your outfits school-appropriate. Or better still, how to flout the rules and get away with it because even the teachers will think you look too gorgeous. ;)

It's boring in class without you. The teachers are already piling on the work and Hikaru doesn't really want to study with me because it reminds him of our Best Friends Study Sessions, I think.

There's something that I want to tell you. I've decided that I also want to become better. Resolute Kaoru is not going to lose to Active Haruhi, you know. I asked my mum for permission to take a more active role in her company. She agreed to let me start out with the Ready-To-Wear division of our Hitachiin label as a design room assistant!

There's one thing that I don't really understand though. When I tried to tell her that Hikaru would enjoy doing the storyboarding (because Hikaru's always been good at that – next time you come to our house I'll show you some of his "mood boards"), she told me that if Hikaru wants to do it, he will have to ask her himself. I told her that I'm asking for him but she said no, and when I told her that I'll ask him to ask her, she said not to do that also!

Never mind all that now. If I work hard, I think my mother might allow me to tag along for the autumn/winter fashion week in New York in February! Then we can meet up and celebrate your birthday with you so that you won't be lonely.

Reply quickly! You take so long. Boo.

Kaoru

.

_"I think once you decide to change, you've already begun your transformation." – Fujioka Haruhi_

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) Team Kyouya is composed of 3 members: Tachibana Seizaburo, Aijima and Hotta. They appear in the volume 8 omake and also make scattered appearances through the manga, such as Chapters 54 and 56.

(b) This is what Tamaki actually says when he calls Kaoru:  
>"Kaoru! Kyouya's not going to call. He's going to go after you. If he gets there before me, make sure Hikaru doesn't get involved! Stay in your classroom, I'm coming to save you now!"<p>

(c) Kaoru's talk with Kyouya regarding the end of the host club is in Chapter 73.

(d) Honey expresses his belief that Kyouya most treasures the host club in Chapter 73.

(e) Akito is Kyouya's second eldest brother. Kaoru does not like Akito much, as seen in Chapter 73 when he expresses annoyance at Akito. Akito also appears to be anxious about Kyouya and his talents, which results in him taking a defensive attitude towards Kyouya.

(f) The quote about the two senpais 'knowing the truth of each other, and being dazzled by that truth' is from Bones, season 5 episode 1 'Harbinger in the Fountain'.

(g) Fuyumi and Tamaki's commoner food tour is referenced in Chapter 23 of the manga.

(h) Haruhi observes how grown-up children from important families must be and makes related comments in Chapter 71.

.

_Next Chapter:_

_2. The Job of a Fashion Intern!_


	4. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER TWO**

**The Job of a Fashion Intern!**

.

_What is not me is Hikaru._

_What is not Hikaru is me._

_I am a half of a whole, a whole in a half._

"Oh, Hitachiin-sama! Your Hikaru-chan and Kaoru-chan are so cute!" someone flatters.

"Hitachiin-sama, your babies look so much like you! Look at their little noses!" someone exclaims.

"I'm sure they will grow up to be as marvellous as you, Hitachiin-sama," someone coos.

"I hear they already show prodigious artistic talent. Such fine additions to the Hitachiin legacy," someone schemes.

"Ahahahaha, are they very mischievous? They must be so active! Boys will be boys, ne?" someone parrots.

There are too many someones here for Kaoru-chan's liking.

Kaoru-chan and his twin have been bundled up in fancy clothing for the occasion. The drawing room is packed to the brim with the most unimaginative of Japan's upper echelon. Most of the people attending the party today are involved in businesses and industries that rake in big money but destroy all concepts of personality and individuality.

Unfortunately, their social duty includes entertaining people such as these once in a while. Their mother schedules the odious set in the same party on the same night to prevent the spread of infection to the artistically-minded set. The family gets no reprieve during this concentrated torture, but all the Hitachiins have agreed that it is better to endure one or two nights in a year rather than disperse these people into separate parties.

In short, these people are cut from the same mold and they render Kaoru-chan catatonic with boredom. To entertain themselves, the twins are weaving through the legs of tables and adults, darting wildly around the room in flagrant disregard for social etiquette. Although it may not seem as though the Hitachiin twins understand the distinction, they know that there are people that they may insult mightily and people that they may not, not unless they want to harm their parents' positions. Regrettably, the odious set tends to fall into the latter. Being unable to insult them to their faces doesn't mean that there aren't ways to circumvent the problem.

Hikaru-chan has a prank in mind, and his pranks never fail.

Kaoru-chan has a plan to get away with it, and his plans never fail.

"I bet I can get them to not say a word to Mum and Dad," Kaoru-chan tells his accomplice confidently.

Hikaru-chan just smiles wickedly at him in total and complete reliance.

So it is _hilarious_ when the guests courteously insist that 'it doesn't matter', and 'I don't mind', and 'it's all right' like a chorus of mindless copycats even though their eyes are blank with annoyance and their smiles look pasted on.

Hikaru-chan and Kaoru-chan were made to be seen _and_ heard, and the world had better know it.

Here is the thing about Hikaru-chan: he cannot control his impulse to cause mischief and he invariably enlists his brother, the most willing accessory to his crimes and his most faithful ally. What only Kaoru-chan knows is that Hikaru-chan inevitably feels guilty and maybe a little bit afraid after his pranks succeed. It is not that Hikaru-chan cares that he has inconvenienced others – on the contrary, he gleefully relishes every time he causes the collapse of social pretence and never apologises for it – but because he loves his parents deeply.

Hikaru-chan only knows how to form deep attachments, and he always has trouble letting go. Since he always has trouble letting go, the only attachments he allows himself to form are the deep ones. These two elements feed each other in a vicious cycle that shrinks their world and makes Hikaru-chan protective and possessive.

Here is the thing about Kaoru-chan: he loves performances, both to watch and to stage, and he customarily recruits his brother, the most compatible thespian for their two-person theatre and his most infallible collaborator. What only Hikaru-chan knows is that Kaoru-chan is an actor protean beyond anyone's wildest guess, his natural talent honed through endless study and practice, through collecting samples of different personalities and different samples of same personalities to imitate. It is not that Kaoru-chan cannot make up his mind – on the contrary, he holds true to whatever dreams he has – but because he finds it hard to trust.

Kaoru-chan likes putting on a show, so he always participates in his brother's pranks. Since he always participates in his brother's pranks, he always gets them off scot-free. These two twins feed each other in a symbiotic cycle that defines them.

One of the boys turns to the guests and addresses them; they do not know which twin it is.

This boy is reasonable and understands their concerns completely. He shows his fine upbringing by making penance for their lack of decorum. Later, he circulates amongst the affected guests, complimenting their business strategies and praising their business acumen. The child even brings over trays of hors d'oeuvres and serves them! Yes, all right, the boy is rather brash with an obvious stubborn streak, and still a little bit insolent in the way he does not respect their seniority and dares to commands their attention in the arena of adults. With the passage of time, however, he will no doubt grow into a strong young man who will do great things. The guests are all thinking that this boy will be a fine prospective spouse or prospective business partner for their own children. They can award no higher accolade than their approval of him.

When Hitachiin-sama and her husband approach their little group, they inquire about the child – ah, it is Hikaru-chan, say the parents. Apparently, in rare moments it is possible to tell them apart for the elder of the two is more robust and dynamic than the younger.

"Brilliant as always, Ka-o-ru," Hikaru-chan says with obvious admiration, hugging him affectionately.

"Told you," says Kaoru-chan.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Within an hour of his mother landing in France, she has already appointed one of her deputies to guide Kaoru in his quest for betterment of the self.

Kaoru has met Roman in the past, though not very often because Roman is predominantly situated in his mother's France office. His teacher is an exercise in stereotypes: European, flamboyant in dress and in personality, absurdly talented, and flamingly homosexual. The six-year-old Kaoru had resented Roman for having the nerve to pinch his cheeks during their first encounter, and had commenced a devious plot of revenge against him only to come narrowly close to having the tables turned on him.

His and Hikaru's plan did succeed partially, having managed to cause Roman to be very late to the fashion show even though he was meant to have been absent entirely. Roman had, in turn, almost caused them to be absent themselves. He remembers being extremely put off at Roman for having discerned their plot, but then Roman had begun chuckling merrily and applauding them for their ingenuity.

Till today, the twins will never admit that it had warmed their hearts to have someone appreciate their trick as much as them.

The work is challenging and serious unlike what Kaoru has previously undertaken, since it relates directly to the upcoming major fashion weeks. Despite his usual exuberance and good cheer, Roman has proved to be a seasoned slave driver in the professional realm. Kaoru has spent the past two days alternating between the tasks that Roman has assigned him and being half-buried in swathes of fabric that are to be used as costumes and drapery for this Friday's host club.

Rather than feeling hopelessly resigned to the long hours, Kaoru has found that simply going through the endless design boards and photographs is fuelling a curious energy within himself. In fact, his mother's creativity and boldness is so breathtaking that it makes him long to be like her, makes him want to do more, makes him want to try harder. He wonders if this is how Honey and Mori feel when they immerse themselves in their martial arts practice, or how Kyouya feels when he is in the thick of business planning and organisation. This increased momentum is not entirely unfamiliar to him since he has of course worked for his mother previously, but he has never felt it on such an intense level.

It has developed into a mini routine of sorts – when he is at home he toils in the atelier, and when he is at school he tucks himself away in the third music room during his free time. Their phenomenal host club room is furnished with absolutely everything for any and all emergencies, including a full set of tailoring equipment that comes courtesy of Kyouya's foresight. And if having lunch in the music room means that he can avoid Kyouya in the lunch room, then that is a perk that Kaoru cannot disagree with.

Kaoru is sure that Hikaru has already noticed a new pattern forming, and would no doubt begin to question him about it soon. He suspects that his twin would have been much slower to catch these changes if Haruhi had been around to distract him. As things stand, Hikaru has taken to following Kaoru around rather aimlessly while they are in school, which is the reason he is currently napping on the plush sofa while Kaoru is assembling the American prep school outfits during lunch break.

Pausing in his work, Kaoru lifts his head and glances over at his Hikaru. A soft sigh escapes him before he can suppress it. He knows that Hikaru is exhausted because neither of them have been sleeping much. Their classmates have begun looking askance at Hikaru's behaviour, half-worried that his lethargy will turn out to be a trick. While Kaoru knows the truth – that his twin is heartbroken from his 'first love', he also secretly thinks that this down time will not last long. Knowing Hikaru as well as he does, he's aware that Hikaru's outgoing and explosive nature is merely lying temporarily dormant.

Another truth: Kaoru really likes the black-haired Hikaru. He thinks that his twin looks positively dashing, but he recognises that the differentiating factor is one that is visible to the eye. It has not escaped his notice that other people's newfound ability to tell them apart requires neither careful investigation nor in-depth analysis on their part. It's _easy_.

Hikaru is turning back into a redhead again, and that's okay. It doesn't bother him anymore if he will not be identified as 'Kaoru' immediately, or at all. Simply being known as 'a Hitachiin' has never been – can never be – an insult to him, even if he does think it indicates that the other person is a shallow simpleton.

For a long time now, Kaoru has felt that there's just no more point in resenting the masses for being unable to tell them apart. His wish has narrowed in scope – all he really wants is for the host club to know them and stay with them. Tamaki has kept his promise; all of the club members are able to beat the Which One is Hikaru-kun Game. The only thing that's left is to figure out a way to keep these friends.

Kaoru wishes dearly to join Hikaru on the sofa, but he is still working on a chic new scarf for Kyouya. The theme this time is much simpler than many of the ones they've had before, especially since the clothing required is modern, smart casual and easily obtained. Most of the articles of clothing have been borrowed from the Hitachiin label with small modifications made to them, and Kaoru has thrown in a few accessories here and there from various sources to complete the outfits. As always, the more effortlessly stylish they look, the more effort Kaoru has put into them.

He is going the extra mile for Kyouya by making a scarf personally for him as atonement. It is inspired by a collection of his mother's from a couple of years back – the angular cuts and structural folds are a nightmare to make, but he imagines the scarf will make Kyouya look even more cool than usual.

His fingers ache terribly, his neck is stiff, his back is crying for mercy, and yet –

He is still going strong.

It is just as well that Hikaru hadn't wanted to help with the scarf. His twin had given him a rather incredulous look when he had insisted on personally hand-stitching something for Kyouya. Seeing Kaoru make the scarf had caused them quite a bit of strife, which they'd ultimately resolved with a compromise – if Hikaru would stop his griping, then Kaoru would work on it out of his sight. No doubt Hikaru considers the club-related work that they are doing to be adequate compensation ("Even if you've offended him, it's not like this club belongs to him or something! Why are you apologising to him specially?"), and he had made some very pointed remarks about Kaoru behaving like Kyouya's domestic help rather than like an heir to the fashion world.

From Kaoru's perspective, however, just as musicians pour their emotions into their music, just as dancers dance their hearts out on the stage, so will he weave his feelings into every stitch of this scarf. Since he still cannot figure out what Honey and Mori want him to say to Kyouya, he needs to speak in another language, one that is so intrinsically him that no matter what he says he cannot get it wrong.

He hears footsteps approaching the music room and ducks his head immediately in trepidation. The past two lunches in the music room have passed by without event, but he now realises that he has been stupid in assuming that today will be the same. Today is the day before their host club relaunch, which means that the decorations will be going up. And the person most likely to oversee the installation is...

Kyouya looks surprised to see him. He must not have realised that Honey had relinquished the other key to the club room to Kaoru. The general custom in the Academy is that the president and vice-president of the clubs will hold one key each to their respective club rooms, but Tamaki has been understandably banned from doing so.

Kaoru keeps his head bowed deeply over his work even as he surreptitiously tries to grab other pieces of clothing to overlay the scarf. It is incredibly difficult to rally when he can sense Kyouya's piercing, unwavering gaze on him.

He recognises that Kyouya has always used all of his actions and reactions as a weapon. Kaoru has catalogued the many times that Kyouya refuses to even spare a glance when he finds something disdainful, such as Tamaki clamouring over something inconsequential. He has seen with his eyes the power that Kyouya displays over something as simple as shutting a book, taking a breath, getting to his feet. Frankly, Kaoru knows of no one apart from his senpai with that level of self-mastery and self-awareness – well, except maybe Mori and Honey.

Once upon a time when Kaoru and Hikaru had just joined the host club, Kaoru had attempted to mimic Kyouya in an attempt to brush up on his acting and impersonation skills. Never before had he been able to find such a convincing portraiture of a villain on which to model himself after, so he had been thrilled. He watched Kyouya for days on end, going home everyday to practise speaking with Kyouya's tone of finality, moving with Kyouya's predatory air, smiling Kyouya's threatening smile. It had freaked Hikaru out so much that he had been ordered to stop.

The experience has taught Kaoru first-hand just how much attention and exertion goes into constantly being on guard this way, and how undeniably _exhausting _it is. It has also taught Kaoru how much purpose must necessarily be injected into each and every action if such a state is to be maintained.

_So why is Kyouya-senpai staring at me for such an extended period of time?_

He lifts his head for a quick peek, unable to resist himself, and finds that Kyouya's gaze is completely obscured by his glasses. Level and unreadable.

"Hi, Kyouya-senpai," he greets in a wobbly voice.

Kyouya blinks once at him languidly, thoroughly unimpressed, before turning his head slightly over his shoulder to indicate to someone that they should enter the room.

Several workmen file inside neatly, each of them hefting pieces of props that look like parts of the interior of a school hall. Kaoru is about to dash over to wake Hikaru up to get him out of the way when the workmen gather to push the entire sofa to a corner of the room. He almost rolls his eyes in exasperation – both because Hikaru does not even stir, and also because as expected, all of Kyouya's hired help are uniformly excellent.

He goes back to his makeshift workstation and sits quietly so that Kyouya can get on with his business, but he cannot help himself from watching. The made-up music room brings an unanticipated wave of soothing relief to him – until this moment he had not realised how much he likes the music room like this, the room itself taking on new personas as a palpable sense of excitement begins to swirl around it.

Large quantities of roses are brought in to refill the copious amounts that Tamaki always uses, and the smell of the flowers seals the delight that is blossoming in Kaoru's chest. A gleeful sound escapes his lips unknowingly and he turns because he thinks he feels Kyouya's attention on him again; he wants to smile at Kyouya – a big, cheesy, 'welcome home' kind of grin, but Kyouya is both too far away and facing away.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Hikaru! Kaoru!" a sunny voice hollers at them as soon as their limousine pulls into the porch. Despite leaving for home immediately after school, their chauffeur is plainly deficient in some way, or why else would their King have arrived here before them? That chauffeur had better keep his shoulder to the wheel or be prepared to find a new job.

Beside him, Hikaru releases a hissing breath and grumbles, "He really is the type of person to be where people want him the least."

This Tamaki looks nothing like the Tamaki in Kyouya's house. The appropriate description for him now is that of an idiot in full swing. Kaoru feels inexplicably jittery at his presence – although he remembers starkly what he had eavesdropped on, like his twin he doesn't feel up to dealing with Tamaki today.

"Get out of the car, come on! Come on!" Tamaki prattles on ecstatically, his blond hair electric in the late afternoon sun. "I haven't seen the both of you in so long! Where have you been having lunch? Oh, I know! Did the both of you find a new secret spot? Is it sunny and windy and romantic? Can I join you tomorrow? We can have a family reunion lunch before the host club!"

His twin says some rather impolite things to Tamaki about his intelligence as he strolls past him into the house, a blasé expression painted onto his face. Tamaki bellows his name once in indignation, making to march after Hikaru, but stops suddenly and turns to Kaoru quizzically.

Kaoru returns with a wary look. "What do you want, Tono?"

A ridiculous grin unfurls itself on Tamaki's face. "Does a father need reasons to check up on his children?"

Kaoru nearly acts on the urge to punch that smile into oblivion. He is beginning to think that what he had seen had been nothing more than the prototype of a new line of lifelike robots programmed to do Kyouya's bidding, made to replace the original humans so that Kyouya may fulfil his plans for world domination. "Who are your children? Besides, you've only ever called Haruhi your daughter, and it's seriously gross now because you two are dating. So leave us out of it. And maybe just stop the father talk entirely."

Without another word, he stalks into the house with every intention of escaping.

"Kaoru! Wait! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait!"

To his annoyance, none of their servants have the guts to slam the door on the Suou heir even when commanded to. _Bloody servants._

Even though Kaoru is almost sprinting to the atelier now, that infernal voice is still hounding him doggedly. _Bloody Suou heirs!_

Kaoru is all out of breath when he finally locks himself into the atelier, collapsing against the door in relief. Unfortunately, he seems to be out of luck as well; he snaps his head up when someone says loudly, "Ne, Kaoru, why didn't you stop running? I'm so tired! Oh, you devilish twins are really fast runners!"

Big rooms mean multiple doors. In the Hitachiin mansion, the atelier is predictably one of the biggest rooms. _Bloody doors._

"What do you want?" he repeats peevishly when he regains his breath. "Stop bothering other people!"

A silence settles on them, the sounds of their panting harsh in the void.

"Are-are you okay?" Tamaki asks finally, shifting from foot to foot uncertainly. "Kyouya really isn't that angry, you know."

"What would _you_ know about Kyouya-senpai's real anger?" Kaoru spits somewhat bitterly at Tamaki. After what he's seen, he thinks it fair to surmise that Kyouya is incapable of being truly angry at this idiot.

Tamaki's eyes widen in astonishment.

The instant the words leave his mouth, Kaoru knows he'd made an error. Tamaki now looks startlingly lucid and irritatingly perceptive. At the back of his mind, Kaoru idly wonders why there seems to be no incarnation of Tamaki that he is genuinely comfortable with since Haruhi had come and gone.

To hide from the scrutiny, he drops to his knees and begins gathering assorted sketches, fabric swatches and drawing utensils to himself. Since the servants have limited access to the atelier, they have to clean up most of the mess that they make themselves. The commercial value of his mother's sketches is exceedingly high, which is why the new season's designs always have to be protected from possible spies. Sadly, often the frenzy of work means that they sweep through the room like a whirlwind, flinging materials and dropping stationery without picking them up.

Of course it is too much to hope that Tamaki will just leave. Even hoping for Tamaki to disregard what he'd just heard is too much, because Tamaki is singularly the most persistent, pushy do-gooder that Kaoru has ever encountered.

Sighing ostentatiously, he meets Tamaki's eyes with brazen impatience. "Are you done standing there uselessly? We have enough mannequins here."

Tamaki is watching him like Kyouya did earlier, and it makes Kaoru_ so_ sick of being studied like a peculiar specimen under magnifying lens.

"What are you doing?" Tamaki questions, his voice clear as a bell.

"Are your eyes purely ornamental like your brain?" Kaoru snaps as he moves to the large work desk and deposits his armful of stuff. He needs to start organising an album of the upcoming spring/summer collection. In the process of his mother's work, one of her employees is always assigned to take full-length and close-up photographs of models wearing the articles of clothing. Every ruffle and embellishment is painstakingly captured by the camera. This is important because little details on the clothes may be changed again and again even up to the last hours before the runway show. There are usually many photographs as a result, all of which need to be sorted coherently by dress and compiled together so that his mother and her team can enhance each dress with suitable accessories and look through all of them as a whole to decide which ones should appear in the show.

Sometimes, the photographs may reveal that the chosen model is not filling out the dress properly, something that is easily overlooked in the hustle and bustle of the fitting sessions. This would prompt a mad hunt for another model with the required height and bone structure and figure. Failing which, Kaoru has known clothes to be excluded simply because no one was able to carry them off, even if the clothing had taken more than 120 hours and a team of _mains_ to make.

What can he say? Hitachiins are perfectionists in their work.

Tamaki has not moved from his spot except to turn around to keep Kaoru in sight. Kaoru really, really doesn't know what Tamaki wants or what he hopes to gain from _standing there_. He will admit that it has crossed his mind to beg Tamaki to help him with The Kyouya Situation, or even to sound Tamaki out as to where Kaoru should be going from here. He will admit that he wants to ask Tamaki about what exactly he did in Haruhi's and Kyouya's lives, and why they are so devoted to him. Then he starts thinking about the conversation he overheard, over thinks it, and begins to feel...

Inadequate.

_Lost._

"Get out," he says roughly, "There are pictures of this season's collection in here, and a big mouth like you can't keep secrets."

"But I won't be able to see the pictures. Didn't you say that my eyes are for decoration only?"

There is a pair of scissors in his hands, and words cannot express how much he wants to throw them at Tamaki, shuriken-style. He detests it when unfunny people try to be funny. Inhaling deeply, he forces his fists to unclench because he doesn't want to spend the rest of his life incarcerated with no options apart from garish orange jumpsuits. Instead he pulls out the chair and sits down calmly, tucks himself into the worktable, arranges his materials methodically and lowers his head to begin on his tasks. He can't work on the scarf or the album with Tamaki here, so he has chosen to continue making his portfolio of _croquis_. Roman had asked for a selection of his current work so as to get a feel on his design aesthetic; from there, Roman promised that they would refine whatever technical skills that Kaoru lacks through practical sewing work.

"Kaoru?"

"Go and nag Hikaru if you like worrying so much. He's been down in the dumps for a few weeks now," Kaoru states, his pen moving fluidly like a professional skater on ice. "Or you could go home if he doesn't want to see you. I'm sure you have many other important things to see to, and your grandmother-sama will want you home soon."

"Kaoru," Tamaki entreats him again. "Kaoru, you can talk to me, you know."

"About what," Kaoru asks through gritted teeth.

"Kyouya isn't really – "

"I said, go pester Hikaru. I'm not him, or can't you tell the difference?"

"You know I can."

"Yeah, great job," Kaoru says back, so neutral that it's even more insulting than sarcasm.

Something flashes in Tamaki's eyes, equal parts concern and annoyance. "Why are you – "

"Go away, Tono."

"You – "

"Just go." Kaoru is so tired. "Please."

But Tamaki is inherently incapable of leaving people alone, so he lingers on until sunset while Kaoru sketches uninterrupted for almost an hour, stroke after stroke of the pen and sheet after sheet of paper, letting himself be dragged under by the rhythm to become blissfully insensate to his surroundings.

Come evening, a crestfallen Tamaki leaves for his meeting at Suou Corp, but not before promising to come back.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Irasshaimase!"

Everyone is smiling so widely that their faces hurt. The hosts, the customers... even the room feels awakened.

The regulars are enthusiastically introducing the newcomers to the hosts. There is so much _noise_. The twins are right at home in this type of atmosphere; their brotherly love act is crazier than usual. Kaoru has been swooning in Hikaru's arms again and again, blushing fervently and saying over-the-top romantic things, slipping in a few outrageous puns every now and then.

The girls are mind-blowingly high-octane today, screaming at every little thing and asking for encore after encore. A more supportive audience cannot be found anywhere else on earth. Renge-chan is still acting as ringleader – her popularity, Kaoru hears, is of such renown in Ouran that a group of first-years are rumoured to be trying to start a trend of wearing the same ribbon bow in their hair. That is still an ongoing saga in the Academy, so Kaoru doesn't know the outcome yet.

Kaoru is so glad that Hikaru is prancing around making a nuisance of himself again. Life itself feels brighter and more hopeful now that club has resumed.

In the middle of the room stands towers of cakes, absurdly high and numerous. These cakes are not pre-made commoner's stuff, but specially commissioned flavours and designs. The most incredible selection of cookies, cupcakes and muffins surrounds the stacks of cakes; Kaoru has tried them, and they are fragrant, baked to perfection and exactly crumbly or fluffy enough. There is every flavour of tea available – western and eastern ranges – English Breakfast, Earl Grey, Darjeeling, sencha, matcha, rice tea... the list is endless. The heady smell of roses permeates the room as the hosts (especially a certain idiot) dish them out unsparingly to the customers, making them flush in pleasure.

Beside the main table, there is a little standalone table that had made the five of them go silent when they first saw it. On it are all the brands of instant coffee available to humankind. Kaoru hadn't even known that there was such a fascinatingly large range. Like his twin, he couldn't have said or done anything to save his life at that moment. Tamaki had tried to blink back his tears and had turned to Kyouya with such a look of love that it hurt to watch – Kaoru has seen that look once before, last year, when Kyouya had brought back news of Tamaki's mother.

Honey had been more direct, flinging himself at the club's vice-president with a cry of "Kyou-chaaaan!". If Kaoru had been bolder, he would have done that too.

Because Kyouya has outdone himself. In the years that Kaoru has been in the host club, they have never had an opening so fiercely anticipated and so spectacular. The delay in re-opening has been transformed to their advantage by Kyouya, who has somehow managed to stir up an unprecedented level of interest in the club. Every time the music room door swings open, Kaoru spies an enormous crowd of boys hovering outside trying to catch a glimpse of the activities inside.

His Honey-senpai is as enchanted as him, gurgling with joy at the cakes before serving generous portions to the customers and himself. He is in the midst of instructing a whole new batch of girls in the art of pairing cakes with specific teas. Mori-senpai, the consummate tea-drinker, is assisting his cousin in this very important task.

Kaoru is just soaking up all of it – the meaning of this host club and the place it occupies in their hearts, including the hearts of their customers. The old customers, too, had been aware of the significance of instant coffee. Many of them had cried over it along with their Tamaki-sama.

Also, though it's rather philosophical, he is contemplating the meaning of Kyouya and the place he occupies in this club, in their group. 'Vice-president' doesn't even begin to cover it. Although Kaoru personally thinks that Tamaki doesn't – shouldn't – have a monopoly on Kyouya, a lot of times it seems that the both of them primarily pay attention to each other first. For example, it obviously means a lot to Hikaru too, to have some substantial reminder of Haruhi present during club, but somehow it doesn't feel like Kyouya brought in that little table for Hikaru or the rest of them at all. If he thinks this way, he feels really angry and left out.

Which is _weird_, because he doesn't begrudge Honey or Mori for prioritising each other, and he himself places Hikaru first.

His attention has wandered along the lines of his thoughts to focus on Kyouya. The girls around the 'cool type' host appear hopelessly captivated by him. If Kaoru may say so himself, Kyouya looks obscenely good in the outfit chosen for him. Kaoru had cut it really close with his labour-time estimate, finishing the scarf only at 3 pm today. Had Tamaki not imposed on him, he would have gotten it done sooner. A scarf that does not meet his exacting standards cannot be given to Kyouya – after all, it is an original Hitachiin and its model is an Ootori.

Said item is currently twined around Kyouya's long, slender neck, eye-catching and seductive. It pulls together the outfit so well that nearly everyone had stopped and stared when they first saw Kyouya. If the sight makes Kaoru's mouth go dry, he can only imagine what it's doing to the girls.

Could it be?

Maybe it's because Tamaki has two people that care about him more than they care about anybody else, and that makes Kaoru feel like Tamaki has more than his fair share.

Or maybe he... wants the truth that they have. To be so difficult, but so known. So flawed, but so loved. Kaoru wants _more_. He wants to assuage the dark fear that terrorises him, the voice in the recesses of his mind that believes the day will come when the host club will split into three groups, each group drifting away from the other as time marches mercilessly onwards.

This is far from an irrational fear, as proven by the most recent debilitating event to hit them.

Kyouya looks his way, a faint question lifting his brow into an arch. _Is there a problem?_

No, there isn't. Anyway, it's probably all for the best. Kaoru would be much too terrified to allow people to know his truth.

"Ne, ne, Hikaru-kun, Kaoru-kun, can we play the Which One is Hikaru-kun Game? We haven't played it for so long but we should now that you both have red hair again and we have new customers!"

"All right!" Hikaru trumpets. Kaoru switches his attention back to his own customers as he stands up and takes his place beside Hikaru. They had seen this coming, so Kaoru had stashed their green berets in a small box at the area where they are hosting. Their president insists that they must be constantly ready as hosts, never to keep the princesses waiting.

They lower their heads and ruffle their hair before sliding the beret on. "Watch carefully!"

Moving at the speed of light, they blaze an untraceable trail across the room before returning to their side-by-side positions and asking in tandem, "Guess which one is Hikaru-kun?"

"Waaa! Kyaaa!" the girls squeal, many clapping in delight. Many of them have never seen this before even if they may have heard of it. Kaoru has previously been informed by Renge that the effect of seeing it for the first time is quite staggering.

The customers guess and they are wrong, so the twins say that they're right.

"Again! Again!"

Once more they dash around and once more they ask, "Guess which one is Hikaru-kun?"

The customers guess and they are wrong, so the twins say that they're wrong.

Knowing that the customers always hate to end on the wrong note, Kaoru is aware that they will have to play a few more times and eventually conclude the game by allowing the customers to be correct.

"Oh, let's play again!"

"Yes, let's! Are both of you ready? One – two – "

"I'm sorry, princesses, but the host club will no longer offer the Which One is Hikaru-kun Game as part of our entertainment," Tamaki waltzes in and decrees. "I know that Hikaru and Kaoru have many more talents and skills that they'll love to show you."

_Say what?_

"T-Tono!" Hikaru splutters.

Tamaki's first rule has always been to give the customers whatever they wish for.

Kyouya is too refined to jerk in surprise but Kaoru can tell that it was a close thing. They should not be discussing these internal administrative matters in front of the customers, and Kaoru has learnt his lesson well about barging in on Kyouya's turf.

"It is as our King says," Kaoru obeys, moving swiftly to smooth over the customers' shattered hopes, "We are very sorry for getting carried away and forgetting ourselves. The princesses' excitement was too encouraging. We have let you down by being irresponsible."

He sees tentative, tiny smiles creeping onto their faces; some of them are softening with acceptance of the situation. Lifting up the teapot, he refills everyone's cup as he says, "In fact, my brother and I really wanted to show all of you some of the photographs that we've been taking. Amane-san and Joshuya-san, the both of you are in the photography club, aren't you? Will you tell us what you think of the photos?"

Hikaru looks a bit pole-axed but catches on quickly enough to help Kaoru lay out the photographs. The seniors are barely concealing the shock on their faces. Like him, Kyouya is doing damage control at his area, which means that the issue will become a non-issue right about... now.

The chatter resumes and the majority of the customers turn back to their designated hosts. After Tamaki rejoins his group, Kaoru casually and unobtrusively studies him even while he appears to the entire world to be in the midst of serving his own princesses.

He is thoroughly unsettled and itching for answers that will come only when the host club is out of session. Thankfully, Kyouya will pursue this matter so all he needs to do is wait around and snoop on their conversation. He can almost guarantee that his senior is doing the same thing as him, inspecting and dissecting Tamaki's actions to get a better understanding about this unforeseen situation.

To gauge Kyouya's thoughts, Kaoru swivels around to sneak a peek – unexpectedly, their eyes meet; Kyouya is looking exclusively at him, his fingers running through the scarf absently.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Tono, what was all of that? What's wrong with playing the game?"

"Yeah, Tama-chan, why not?" Honey concurs. "It might negatively impact the twins' profits if they stop...?"

Kyouya is happily ensconced in his usual spot, unflappably wrapping up the accounts for the day and going through the bookkeeping ledgers. Funny how once again the club had expected him to do something only to get the opposite result. Funny how Honey, of all people, ended up having to voice the monetary concerns that should have belonged to their penny-pinching vice-president.

Everyone is hanging on in suspense for Kyouya to speak.

Struck again by how much they constantly ask of Kyouya, Kaoru cannot refrain from suggesting alternatives to entertain their customers and trying to appease and convince everyone that it won't be of consequence if they no longer use the game as their principal act.

"Why are you defending Tono? Do you agree with this decision? Is it that the game has become boring to you?" Hikaru demands.

_It's not Tono I'm defending, you silly idiot._

Mori smiles at him like he'd heard that through some psychic brainwave messaging system. "Kyouya isn't objecting," he points out reasonably and concisely.

And that's that. To argue against either Kyouya or Mori is madness – to take on both is fatal.

Hikaru harrumphs in disbelief and starts packing up to go home, his movements fitful and frustrated. "That's really great that nobody seems to have a good reason and nobody is explaining why yet everybody is just going along with it."

Lifting both his and his brother's bags onto his shoulders, he raises his head to face Kaoru, indicates the door with a forceful tilt of his head and promptly strides away. Kaoru is already following when Kyouya requests that he stay behind, stopping them both in their tracks.

"What for?" Hikaru snarls.

"I wish to talk to him regarding some club matters," Kyouya replies placidly.

"So talk."

"I don't imagine it will be a short conversation."

Apprehension is building up in Kaoru every second – he's kicking himself for telling his twin that he had cried after leaving the Academy; he was going to lie, but the possibility of Hikaru finding out the truth from the seniors was too high. Hikaru is naturally predisposed to accept Kaoru's explanations; since he understands Kaoru's fear and loneliness so well, he is unable to do otherwise than completely absolve Kaoru of any wrongdoing where the posters are concerned. That has the troubling side effect of making him think of Kyouya as the villain in the circumstances, which doesn't bode well for the current state of affairs.

His twin's eyes are narrowed in a surefire sign that he is about to say something awful.

"Do you really have something to say or are you looking for a way to punish him where none of us can see you? What, do you want him to do slave labour? Go down on his knees and offer tea to you?"

"Hikaru, enough!" Kaoru panics, trying to drag Hikaru away. Kyouya's glasses blaze furiously under the glare of the lights.

"You don't own this club you know. He stayed up for the past_ three_ nights to _hand-stitch_ that stupid scarf for you because he feels sorry for god-knows-what, but you don't give a damn about how the rest of us feel, do you? Can you really not understand why Kaoru would – why _we all_ would want to come back to club? Aren't you supposed to be smart? Isn't it obvious that Kaoru's sorry for what he did? That's why he looks so tired, but do you _care_, you twisted, bullying arse – "

Mori lands his hands heavily on Hikaru's shoulders – his severe presence and the weight he is exerting on Hikaru silences him momentarily.

"Enough," Mori warns, picking Hikaru up and hauling him out bodily. Hikaru struggles desperately against the firm grip, shouting some things that make Tamaki's face crumple sadly.

"That's not it!" Tamaki denies vehemently, rushing after the two as they disappear from view. "That's not it at all! Don't say things about Kyouya that aren't true!"

"You only think it's untrue 'cos the only person he cares for is you! Days! _Days_ I had to – Mori-senpai, it hurts! – watch Kaoru grovel in apology for doing something that, guess what, _EVERYONE_ WANTED TO – Mori-senpai!"

As the voices trail off into the distance and a hush descends on them, Kaoru is shaking his head numbly, unconscious of everything except the ice cold horror in him. Of course Hikaru – of all people – would be able to read his feelings in his designs, his creations. The aftermaths of their fights have never felt as terrible as this.

"Oh, Kao-chan," sighs the most disappointed voice in the history of the world, "Did you not say you're sorry?"

It is _killing _him.

He keeps shaking his head, dazed and foolish. He can't remember the question; he didn't hear it in the first place.

"He did, Honey-senpai," says another voice surprisingly close to his ear. A pair of chilly hands encircles his head lightly, limiting it from further movement. "Hikaru misunderstood. I was merely going to discuss with Kaoru the possibility of him succeeding as president of the club."

"Ohhh," Honey replies, unmistakeably relieved. "_Oh!_ Okay! Wow, Kao-chan!"

Kyouya's hands really are freezing, but somehow the touch seems to thaw him out. Kaoru is led to the sofa and gently pushed down to sit – after a minute or so, a glass of warm water appears in his hands.

"In that case, I think I will go and help Takashi and Tama-chan," Honey giggles sweetly, rounding up their bags and hoisting all of them onto his small frame. He comes over to where Kaoru is sitting and drops a kiss on his head before he leaves.

Kaoru stays in that semi-trance state for an indeterminate period of time, during which he watches Kyouya move around the room briskly, rearranging the furniture and doing some basic cleaning up. This is an essential part of closing club after every session. The caretakers and cleaners employed by the school do tidy the club rooms regularly, but Kyouya has always stressed that it is their responsibility to ensure that all property of the host club has been properly put away, or the negligent person will be charged for the loss along with an additional fine.

A _very_ substantial fine.

"I'm sorry," Kaoru blurts abruptly.

Kyouya pauses, straightens up and raises one end of the scarf. "Apology accepted."

Aijima's instructions are echoing in his head: accept it and don't say anything more. Kaoru clamps his lips together and nods, but a dilemma soon presents itself – one that Team Kyouya has not provided coaching for. Kyouya seems to be waiting for something... for him to say something?

_Oh no, help!_

A smirk crosses Kyouya's face. "You didn't hear anything I said just now, did you?"

"H-huh?"

_Did I hallucinate his forgiveness because I wanted it too badly?_

"My proposition," Kyouya explains, deliberately explaining nothing at all.

Kaoru cannot for the life of him remember what Kyouya had asked, or whether he had even asked anything! "Uhhh..."

"Oh dear, it looks like your candidacy may have to be revoked. We wouldn't want a blockhead as a president now would we?" Kyouya says the last part so dryly that it's a miracle his voice didn't snap.

"Y – you – you want me to – ?"

"Don't tell me, this club is destined to have dimwits for presidents. I've long suspected it but it's reassuring to receive confirmation."

Kaoru is floored. "_Why?_"

"Why, what?"

_Why does Kyouya-senpai need to appoint a – _

Comprehension slams into Kaoru with the force of a bullet train.

"Ah, I see you've realised. Yes. At the end of this school year, Tamaki and I will be leaving the host club."

Kaoru's gut twists at the words. _No._

"Our club is considerably different from most of the other school clubs – because we constantly organise large-scale events that must accommodate a vast number of customers, the financial and human components are significantly more complex than what the other clubs have to deal with. Further, our events share no commonality apart from the presence of the hosts and the customers. Often we cannot look to the same supplier or builder when planning our cosplays because the theme keeps changing; unlike the tennis club, for example, we are unable to source our materials and tools from the same company each time we host something. Resource allocation is _critical_ because the budget that we receive is the same as all other Tier 1 clubs, yet our expenditure is usually at least thrice of theirs, sometimes even five times as much."

"That high?" Kaoru exclaims.

Kyouya gives him a look, as if to say – _please keep in mind the personality of the incumbent president._

"Indeed. That is why I have often found a need to look elsewhere for the funds if the club is to survive."

Kaoru cannot stop his mouth from curving into a smile. He ducks his head when Kyouya glares at him.

"The financial records are of paramount importance. If the accounts are not constantly accurate and up-to-date, the winding up of the club would be the least of your problems. As we routinely incur sizeable debts, the club could easily tip over into insolvency, at which point we will face legal action from external companies_ and_ the school itself – "

Kaoru lets out an involuntary gasp.

" – because," Kyouya continues, "the school has its policy set out very clearly in the Ouran Club Guidelines, which specifically disclaims all costs that students incur in the course of their club activities, as well as provides notice to the students of the school's ability to sue for negligence and breach of contractual duties, the contract document being of course the mandatory Club Constitution that each club must present to the school for validation before formal establishment. This is the clubs' quid pro quo for having the financial freedom to make our own decisions without approval by the school for every single matter that requires a movement of club funds."

"There's actually something like that in the Academy's Constitution?"

"Yes. Schedule 2. It is the responsibility of the secretary of every club – and for clubs with no secretary, the vice-president – to read it. They must sign a form to acknowledge that they've read and understood it as a precondition to setting up the club. All subsequent secretaries must sign the form before formally assuming the role."

"Kyouya-senpai..." Kaoru breathes in amazement.

"Yes?"

"You've been acting as our vice-president, secretary _and_ treasurer?"

"I revel in the challenge," Kyouya chuckles amusedly. "Besides, it was due to the practical circumstances of our club – we have so few members today; at the time of formation, our numbers were even smaller. Moreover, Mori-senpai had an ongoing involvement with the kendo club and Honey-senpai had other commitments."

Kaoru almost laughs. _Since when is eating cake a commitment?_

"The learning curve will be very steep, Kaoru."

_Yeah. Oh, yeah._ Kaoru can see that.

"There is one thing that we must first consider, however." Kyouya sits down across Kaoru and examines him seriously, openly. "Do the three of you have intentions to continue on with the club?"

Kaoru draws back, stunned. He hadn't even thought about that. "B-But wouldn't all of you come back when we are in session? Can't you and Tono come back like Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai?"

"You know that my intention is to attend an Ivy League university, Kaoru."

He had known, but he'd never had the knowledge brought home in this manner before. The strongest impulse to cling onto Kyouya comes over him. He can't bear to let go.

His reluctance must have shown on his face, because Kyouya uncharacteristically clasps one of his hands in both of his and gives him a little pat. "I very much doubt that Tamaki's grandmother and parents will permit him to linger at this stage of life when there are greater things waiting for him after school. Kaoru, not even Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai can keep this up indefinitely. Even now, they make time for us because they miss us. That time must be diverted to some other purpose one day. It will be only you, Hikaru and Haruhi – either the three of you support the club, or it must close down.

"The crux is this – if none of the three of you want to shoulder the responsibility of the host club, I will prepare to terminate it at the end of this year."

"You can't!" Kaoru wails.

Kyouya leans back in his seat, his posture so entirely relaxed that Kaoru knows it must have been calculated.

"The only other alternative is for someone to start taking over the reins."

All of Kyouya's cards are on the table. Kaoru knows what Kyouya wants from him, but he doesn't think he can do it.

"Why me? Out of the three of us, why pick me, Kyouya-senpai?"

The black depths of Kyouya's eyes are lit from within by a smile – he only does this when he is particularly pleased or content, and this type of smile is rarer than any other expression to grace that handsome face. Sadly, despite its beauty, it does come with an inbuilt defect – it usually manifests itself when some opponent of Kyouya's comes to a violent and tragic end.

Pale, deft fingers caress the corrugated edge of the scarf. "This is extraordinarily beautiful, Kaoru."

He can feel himself going pink with satisfaction. "Thank you."

"Tamaki reports that you've been occupied by fashion-related work lately."

"Uh, yes."

"Why?" The question is asked in an almost-drawl.

He is every bit as sharp as Kaoru expects. Only Kyouya would think to ask 'why' to news that Kaoru is attempting to enter the industry that his family is famed for. Kyouya doesn't take it for granted that people will one day follow in their family's footsteps – he watches out for the people who ride on their family's past achievements to get to esteemed positions, for he knows that those are the ones with the least skill and the largest egos. The easiest prey in the corporate jungle.

How shall Kaoru answer someone so smart without revealing too much of himself to possible attack?

"If you tell me why you do the work you do, Kyouya-senpai, I'll tell you why I do the work I do."

_That is, either you assume our answers are the same, or you'll have to tell me yours first in order to find out mine._

Again the smile in the eyes. Two in a day, what a record.

Kyouya uncrosses his legs and stands up, moving over to arrange his books and laptop neatly into his bag. "I will give you time to think it over. If there are any more issues that you need to factor into your decision-making process, I will be happy to go through them with you."

"Yes," Kaoru quips, deciding to tease, "I wonder about this mentor that I am to learn from – do you think that this mentor will be overbearing and draconian?"

"I have no doubt whatsoever," Kyouya answers with a pulsating aura of evil. "You object to learning under this mentor?"

"No." His body convulses with the fierceness of his laughter. "Your work ethic is the easiest thing to respect about you, Kyouya-senpai," he chokes out, failing to see a gratified smile flicker across Kyouya's lips.

"Even if you assume the care and charge of the host club, there still exists a likelihood of it closing down when the three of you finish your final year," Kyouya says soberly. "Or worse, falling into the hands of undesirables."

Kaoru senses that Kyouya has thought a lot about this – too much, perhaps. Suddenly he wants to say something comforting; he knows he isn't the only one who cherishes the host club. "It won't be so bad if we keep making the effort to meet up. We'll make time for each other, like what the senpais are doing."

"Mm," Kyouya murmurs fondly as he waves Kaoru over. They head to the door together, Kyouya's bunch of keys clinking softly with each step that they take. "Ranka-san let slip that he is prepared to join Haruhi in America if she grows accustomed to the country."

"Eh?!"

"Especially if she is admitted into one of the Ivies. He doesn't want to spend too many years apart from her – understandable, since she is his only kin."

"Do you think that they might settle there for good?" Kaoru takes the keys from Kyouya and locks the club room.

"There's a chance, yes."

"And Tono...?"

"He doesn't know, and I'd prefer for him to remain unaware for now. You know how he gets about anything to do with Haruhi. Suou Corp is based here and that's a fate he can't escape – no need to distract him with as-yet-unfounded worries of the future."

Kaoru snorts. "I wonder if Ranka-san will ever like me as much as he likes you. I'm sure he'll have something to say about it if I replace you as the Parent Liaison Officer."

"Not to worry," Kyouya smirks. "He takes my recommendations very seriously."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

It is only after arriving home that Kaoru realises two things: a) Kyouya never gave an answer about why he picked him, and b) Kyouya had worn the scarf home instead of shelving it with the rest of the host club costumes.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) '_Mains_' is a French term that literally means 'hands', referring to the workers in an atelier who use their talent and skills to create the kind of clothing that people dream of wearing, mostly by hand. '_Premières Mains'_, meaning 'first hands', are the most experienced experts of the group. They aren't factory workers (goodness forbid) but specialised artists mostly employed by high fashion houses. Their work is highly precise, delicate and labour-intensive; every designer relies on them to bring their visions to life.

(b) '_Croquis_' are design sketches. They need not be detailed or particular; the main purpose is to help the designer to visualise the article of clothing as a finished piece or as part of an entire collection.

(c) Certainly amongst all of you distinguished readers, there will be many who are fashion savvy and knowledgeable beyond what humble facts I have managed to gather. For the less well-versed, however, here is some basic information:

New York, London, Milan and Paris each host a fashion week twice a year with New York kicking off each season and the other cities following in the aforementioned order.

The two major seasons are: Spring/Summer in September, and Autumn/Winter in February.

Hitachiin Yuzuha operates in France and Japan. Therefore, she shows in Paris, which is the last major fashion week of the season. If you think that they seem to be doing so many important things even though there are only a few weeks left to the show – you're right. Fashion houses usually rush to the very last minute; it's virtually impossible to be completely prepared for a show ahead of time.

(d) As a matter of interest, here is the name of the game that the twins like to play:

どうちがひかるくんでしょうかゲーム。  
>Docchi ga Hikaru-kun deshou ka game.<p>

'Which one is Hikaru' game.

.

_Next Chapter:_

_3. Beware the Shadow Boss!_


	5. Chapter 3A

**CHAPTER THREE(A)**

**Beware the Shadow Boss!**

.

The flower is alive and extending its magic through Kaoru-chan.

He is using only baby-sized white flowers and woodsy colours for this arrangement to reflect the purity of the fresh snow in this wintry season. The window is wide open to allow in refreshing gusts of frosty air that swirl around him and his flowers, creating a connection between his spirit and theirs.

The supple branches arc gracefully under the pressure of his petite hands, forming loops of empty space like the frames of glasses – a sanctuary for the child's secrets. At his soft nudge, the final component slots into place – a stalk, stiff and proudly straight, head and shoulders above its peers but so very lonesome, its height giving it a look of brittleness rather than of strength.

The plant is poisoned with Kaoru-chan's fear and desire. His perennial fear of being left alone and his eternal desire to be known. All of this is nothing new, but the plant is a new friend who had asked for a piece of his heart, and Kaoru-chan gives of himself because he does not understand how much it will cost him.

He waits for the plant to give him its soul – measure for measure, like for like.

The plant is grieved by Kaoru-chan's devotion, and it whispers: _I need the sun and air and water more than I want you._

That glacial night, he cruelly (_lovingly_) leaves his creation out on the balcony where it will be showered in what it needs. He wants the plant to stay with him, but the plant needs those other things. _It is the way of the world_, the plant says, _that need triumphs over want_.

The next morning, he hurries to his friend anxiously. Tiny ice crystals have formed on his flower arrangement overnight, sparkling radiantly where the sunlight grazes them. He feels proud on its behalf but still he yearns for its company – the rest of the day is spent debating whether to bring it into the warmth to protect it, or leave it where it would be cold but remain untouchably perfect.

In the end, he accedes to his friend's wishes because he knows he cannot change what his friend is without destroying what it was, and what his friend was is precious to him.

Thus, the decision made, Kaoru-chan had gone holidaying with his family; but what was weeks to Kaoru-chan had been a lifetime for his friend.

His friend is wilted and on the threshold of death when he returns to it. He cradles the plant to his body, crying and wanting and hating. Flowers are stretched out to him, weak and quivering – reciprocation at last, in the form of ardent longing – _I think, _mourns the plant_, it is the way of the heart, that want triumphs over need. _

Kaoru-chan gives up ikebana after this, refusing to open himself to a connection by making another arrangement. To dissuade his family from prying, he persuades Hikaru-chan to let him claim all of his work as theirs.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The key to victory in every battle is preparation.

Kaoru clutches tightly his sword (a cup of the finest quality coffee brewed to maximum potency) and his shield (a breakfast so scrumptious that even demons would salivate at it) as he makes his way to confront the enemy in its lair.

He expects that the room will be eerily silent, with its thick and heavy curtains still drawn despite it being high noon on this bright and clear Sunday.

He expects that the sole occupant of the room will have eyes dark and murderous. Kaoru intends to throw down the gauntlet (set the tray down on the table) and back away to let the creature test his offering at its pleasure.

The respect on Hotta's face makes him feel like a hero.

Said hero has a devious grin on his face as he nods his thanks when Hotta holds the door open for him. He slips into the room...

And freezes in shock.

"Another half a minute and you would have been late," Kyouya tuts. "Such a poor way it would be for us to start, don't you think?"

No matter how Kaoru feels at the moment, it can't be as bad as poor Hotta, who looks as though he's midway through an episode of cardiac arrest. He takes note of the fact that Kyouya's hair is mildly damp – he must have been awake for a while, long enough to have a shower and to air it dry – a massive anomaly because, as far as Kaoru is aware, Kyouya generally showers in the evening for obvious reasons.

Tachibana is standing at attention beside his master, stoically receiving a string of rapid fire instructions. His master does not appear to need to pause for breath – similar to how Kaoru's mother behaves when she gets to her office every morning. Like his mother's personal assistants, Tachibana mops up every word with his sponge of a brain, occasionally confirming to Kyouya that something has already been readied or done in anticipation of Kyouya's order.

_Oh, no._ Does Kyouya intend to speak to him this way? Kaoru is used to taking his mother's orders but he's fairly sure that she slows down quite a bit for them. Ah, parents. With their best of intentions they sometimes end up paving the road to hell.

Hotta is censured for standing there like an idiot and is given his own set of instructions to carry out. The servants leave the room; Tachibana with purpose and drive, Hotta with sweat drops raining from his bald head.

Kaoru is kind of frightened, like a rabbit in front of an oncoming train. He has heard legends of who this is. This is Business Kyouya.

"Sit."

Kaoru sits.

"Did you bring everything I asked you to?"

"Yes." He is going to give short, safe answers like a stunted soldier.

"Have you eaten?"

"No." Kaoru had thought that he would have his midday meal with Kyouya.

"Eat."

Kaoru eats.

"Are you done?"

"Yes."

Kyouya finally turns away from his papers, looks at him and smiles. "Then, we shall begin."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**1. The Superlatively Professional Conversation**  
><strong>Sunday, 12 September 2010.<strong>

Kaoru places a thick file on the table and proceeds to unpack its contents: a copy of the Ouran Club Guidelines (Schedule 2 of Ouran Academy's Constitution), a copy of the Host Club Constitution, the acknowledgement form for Schedule 2, the form for formal appointment of a club secretary, and a plain sketchbook.

That last item he'd been asked to bring had actually been a notebook/diary – the sort of thing that's more Kyouya's cup of tea. Kaoru works better without lines. He likes to draw and doodle and shape even his words into pictures. It should make no practical difference to Kyouya, he hopes.

He has read the Club Guidelines and the Host Club Constitution as requested. Even though yesterday was not a school day, it had been a lot to absorb in a single day – the precision and detail of their club's Constitution reveals too much of Kyouya's hand in its drafting. Who in the world would want to read legal documents such as these for a living?! Mori and Haruhi must be mad.

"Any preliminary questions about the Guidelines or our club's Constitution?" Kyouya asks as he pulls the acknowledgement form and appointment form to him.

Kaoru shakes his head; he'd understood them well enough – the real difficulty had been to stay awake while reading them. The terms and conditions they stipulate are acceptable to him; the responsibilities they confer are accepted by him. Yesterday afternoon, he had called Honey and chatted with him for an hour or so. The confidence that his senpai had shown in him had been just the thing he'd needed. He'd also been graciously informed that he would have custody of Usa-chan every Wednesday henceforth, to accompany him when he has to make plans in the lead-up to club, and to be returned to Honey when club goes in session on Fridays.

An amused glint enters Kyouya's eyes when he notices that Kaoru has already signed the form for his formal appointment. Kaoru had been unable to sign the acknowledgement form for Schedule 2 because that form requires attestation, so he has to sign in front of Kyouya for the signature to be valid. In turn, for his formal appointment to be valid, Kyouya has to sign as vice-president to certify that Kaoru is indeed the secretary that the club wants.

Such complexity and formality must be unheard of in commoners' schools, but he supposes that in a school like Ouran, where large sums of money regularly change hands, some things must be taken very seriously. Even though Kaoru himself finds no joy in these documents, he can see that such transactions will feature prominently in their adult lives, so it makes sense for them to get some practice in early. Honey had told him that this is de rigueur in Ouran for more than their club lives – in their individual classes, the class chairperson and secretary must sign certain forms under Schedule 1 of the Academy's Constitution as well.

That means that Kyouya must be bound by a thousand of these forms and regulations.

"It's done," Kyouya announces as he tucks the forms away. "It will be official as soon as I lodge it with the school."

Kaoru closes his eyes and listens to his breathing, letting the enormity of the moment wash over him. A year from now, will he look back upon this as his first step towards club presidency? What if –

As though prescient, Kyouya derails his line of thought before his insecurities can assail him.

WHUMP. Tachibana has been directed to dump a large stack of files on the table.

"From now onwards, you will take charge of the host club's administrative affairs and process all documents relating to the club. You will also undertake secretarial and organisational tasks; the secretarial tasks fall into two broad categories: the customers and the hosts, and the organisational tasks relate to the sessions or events. I will retain control of the treasury for now as that is the most challenging part of club operations," Kyouya launches in without preamble.

He twirls his laptop around so that Kaoru can see its screen. "We currently have 154 customers on file. Only high school students may patronise the host club, but we have no restrictions on gender, as I'm sure you'll remember from the Kasanoda incident. Each new customer must have a profile entered in our database, like so, with all relevant information updated as necessary. I recommend that you begin bringing a laptop to school every day for convenience; alternatively, you may make a record of it in your notebook but you must update the electronic database without fail. Customers are sorted alphabetically by surname by default, but they may also be sorted by year level and class or by host preference.

"Birthdays are noted and will be celebrated as necessary. I have consolidated the customers' and hosts' birthdays into this chart. You will have noticed that I traditionally arrange for a gift plus two host bookings free-of-charge. You are now free to vary this as you see fit, but it is wholly your responsibility to keep track of all upcoming birthdays. I will not be providing reminders to you in the event that you forget, and you shall have to bear whatever consequences that may flow from your forgetfulness. A word of warning – be cautious about doing anything too extravagant for a customer's birthday, because it will set a new bottom line for the customers' expectations that you will henceforth have to satisfy.

"Here are the contact numbers of all the customers." Kyouya flicks through several customers' profiles and scrolls down to where the contact numbers are located. "By tomorrow, all of these customers must have their numbers on your phone's contacts list. You may wish to acquire an additional phone solely for host club matters, such as I have. You must also be able to contact their next-of-kin or their household, so those numbers should be recorded in your phone alongside the customers' information.

"Pay attention to the customers' preferred doctor and their pre-existing medical conditions. As we have many outdoors and external events, you must be able to take action swiftly if a medical emergency occurs. Perhaps, this includes learning a bit of first aid yourself?" Kyouya hints somewhat wryly.

Kaoru can remember the few times that accidents have happened in the host club – Kyouya was always the one to take care of it, always the one to react so quickly, and all of them had presumed that it should naturally be so because of Kyouya's family background. Kaoru wonders why he thought that these things were compulsory in Kyouya's life when in reality they are mere options that Kyouya had elected of his own free will – what does it say about them, the way that they've dehumanised Kyouya; and what does it say about Kyouya, that he lets them do this to him?

He is hit by a feeling so strong that it's almost a premonition – all this time, it was Kyouya's hands and Tamaki's heart that had held the host club together. What Kaoru is doing now, learning how to succeed Kyouya – that's not just taking responsibility of a school club but taking responsibility for the seven of them. If he does not get this right, they will meet their ruin at his doing.

With that horrible understanding comes a painful pressure in his chest and a clawing sensation at his throat. _Kyouya-senpai_, _do you realise what you're gambling on me?_

Being in this position, being the piece at the base of their precarious tower of blocks, being the person who must give without guarantee of receiving in return... Where will he find the strength? He has no Tamaki of his own. And even without that particular emotional crutch, Kyouya is still far stronger than he is.

He is on the verge of telling Kyouya that he doesn't have what it takes to do this when Kyouya interrupts crisply. "It was a casual suggestion," he says, slight vexation apparent in his voice, "and not a definite order. If you have no wish to learn it, you simply need to ensure that you have the best medical services at your fingertips. Were you thinking about some other immaterial things? Do not let your self-doubt get the better of you."

Such superhuman focus and strength.

Kaoru shouldn't have let his concentration wander; it is not for his teacher to put up with his distractions and anxieties. He nods and apologises, acknowledging the solemnity of this meeting. This is not some friendly lunch at Kyouya's house during the weekend.

Kyouya nods once in return, placated.

"On occasions when we hold events outside of school hours and outside of school grounds, we may need to issue consent forms to indemnify ourselves against any possible losses. The standard consent form is in this folder – the blanks must be filled in with details of the event, and only customers with completed consent forms will be permitted to join us.

"Unfortunately," Kyouya makes a sound like a swallowed sigh, "there are customers who do not take this procedure seriously. As a result of that, after ascertaining whether they wish to attend a particular event, I personally contact the household of the customers who are repeat offenders – these customers are marked with an asterisk beside their name. It has also often been the case that some customers who are usually diligent may find that the consent form slips their minds during a busy period. In situations such as these, I send my team to contact their household for official authorisation by their parents before I allow them entry into the event. It is thus advisable for you to encourage customers with unsigned consent forms to report the problem to you at the soonest available opportunity so that steps may be taken to resolve it. Under no circumstances whatsoever are you to take in a customer who has not produced the required paperwork. You may make it up to them by offering some complimentary host bookings or other tokens and giveaways but this rule is absolute. Do you understand?"

"Yes, sensei." Kaoru doesn't have a 'Team' that he can dispatch at will; he's going to have to make a few modifications to their current system of doing things.

Kyouya taps the screen, calling his attention to a series of blank boxes with an image of a padlock. "As you can see, there is a locked section on each of the customers' pages. I have withheld from you my assessments of our customers' private and public lives. It is worthwhile being au courant with their lifestyles and individual circumstances. Do some exploration into their family backgrounds – you should be entirely clear about which customer has a family business in what industry or area of expertise. After each customer that you research, you will have to present your findings to me to retrieve a password to unlock the corresponding page, in order that you may also enter your results into the system."

How Kaoru wishes that Kyouya is merely joking with him, but Business Kyouya does not kid. He opens his mouth to protest at the insanity of it all; such an investigation is going to take him forever.

"Of all the tasks that I am setting for you, I already know that this is the one that you will excel in," Kyouya cuts in before Kaoru can emit a single sound. "If my memory serves, you found out about Tamaki's past with little to no difficulty, and you have personally helped me source for information previously. I know well your level of skill."

_Well, damn._ With such high compliments levelled at him, there's no way he can plead for leniency. While it is fun doing amateur spy work, Kaoru doesn't really want to become the next Shadow King. He chews on his bottom lip, unwilling to voice his ambivalence.

As expected, Kyouya easily picks up on it. "The purpose behind this is to facilitate the matchmaking between customer and host. While the majority have their minds made up about which one of us they prefer, bet upon it that you will have to nominate choices for a portion of our clients. You must be prepared to suggest options if they ask for your recommendations. Bear in mind that every choice and action that you make will reflect on the club as a whole," he explains, steel in his voice. "Your failures will be the club's failures. Therefore, you must carefully observe which hosts a particular client gravitates to. The instant that the client makes known her partiality, you will log all of her selections into her profile. So far, so good?"

So far, so tough. Kaoru inclines his head in affirmation anyway – he understands the theory behind all of that; it is the practical aspect that will be onerous.

Kyouya switches to another document on his laptop. "Next order of business: at the moment, we have 7 hosts on file. Hosts are sorted by year level and class by default, but they may also be sorted by customer or alphabetically by surname."

Belatedly, it strikes Kaoru that he is boldly delving into where no one has been before: Kyouya's personal dossiers. A rush of excitement floods through his body; he squirms in utter fascination. _What will he find?_

Kyouya gives him a peculiar look but abstains from commenting. "You may peruse all of this at your leisure later on."

_YES!_ Free rein to turn Kyouya's mind inside out!

"It doesn't disturb me at all that you look so delighted," Kyouya deadpans.

Kaoru grins unrepentantly at him. The Shadow King's running commentary on everyone and everything - he's so looking forward to it! Who knows what sort of judgements Kyouya has been passing on them?

"Moving on," – was that a hint of irritation? – "organising the club sessions and events."

Here, he pauses for dramatic effect, allowing the most frightful atmosphere of evil to permeate the room.

Kaoru's bones are rattling in his body by the time Kyouya condescends to speak again. "I want you to build up your own network of contacts."

_... It can't be._

Build an entire network from scratch? He is _doomed_. "Kyouya-senpai, surely..."

"There most certainly is such a need. You will be finding and employing – on your own initiative and under your own steam – the required suppliers, builders, businesses and hired help that the club will need in order to run smoothly. You will establish a suitably close professional relationship with them. Their numbers should be on your speed dial. Their work must be outstanding and reliable. They must be at your beck and call in all exigencies. Your wish must be their command," Kyouya smiles a smile that would have been sweet on anyone else. "Are we clear?"

"Kyouya-senpai!" He is only just keeping the whine at bay. "That's too... Can't you – you have to give me something to start with!"

"Absolutely not."

"Kyouya-senpai..." Kaoru seems to be unable to do much else but call Kyouya's name futilely even as he knows that Kyouya will not budge.

"You have 4 weeks in which to do this. This means that, of the next 4 sessions, the first 2 will still be planned and organised by me and using my resources – the following 2 after that will be joint projects. I will then take on a purely supervisory role. If your network is not sufficiently formed by then, you will accept all repercussions resulting from your lack of success."

Kaoru can feel himself rapidly descending into hysteria. "You can't just leave me like that! It's not going to be possible! That's too demanding even from someone like you, senpai!"

A hand settles on his head and ruffles his hair affectionately. "I said you had to create your own network; I didn't say that I will hold back from helping you once you've done that. I will teach you how to direct your forces and stretch them to their fullest potential. What I am essentially trying to do is withdraw my troops and replace them with yours. I will support you whenever and wherever you need me, Kaoru."

"You sure? Because I don't think I – "

"Do _not_ let your self-doubt get the better of you," Kyouya repeats emphatically, gazing at him with the most wonderful blend of courage and compassion. "I chose you. Unless you wish to insult me, you may not think poorly of yourself. If you have no faith in yourself, have faith in me."

His senpai summons and he will answer, gulping the rotten feeling down and dragging out a shaky smile from the depths of his anxiety. He feels scared to death but he will do it anyway.

Yes, he will do it, or he will die trying.

"On top of all the tasks I have already assigned to you, you must memorise the basic information of all the customers as well as the entire profiles of all the hosts. The deadline for this is 2 weeks. I will test you."

Kaoru lowers his head miserably, "Yes, Kyouya-senpai."

"Good. Now, have a look at these books – they are the financial records of the club since its inception to the current day. You need only have cursory knowledge of their contents. After which, you're dismissed to do whatever you need to do."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**2. The Comparatively Professional Conversation**  
><strong>Tuesday, 14 September 2010.<strong>

Kaoru had run home in an insane panic on Sunday, begging Hikaru for help with the album for their mother. Roman had ordered him to get it done by the 14th to allow the France office two weeks' time to resolve any outstanding issues before the Paris Fashion Week.

Hikaru had been taken aback when he'd found out about Kaoru's assignment. Their mother had instructed Kaoru not to lie to Hikaru about any of it, but he was not to tell Hikaru that he had asked to do this work. After much thought, Kaoru believes he understands his mother's intentions – she wants Hikaru to find the motivation himself. If Hikaru were to become aware of Kaoru's choice to become further involved with the company, he would feel compelled to follow Kaoru without having first unearthed his own desire and ambition towards the company.

Their mother had guessed, correctly, that Hikaru would presume that Kaoru had been asked to arrange the album rather than being the one who had done the asking. So it was that the both of them had burned the midnight oil on Sunday and used all their free time on Monday to complete the album. Hikaru's love for him is so wide and so unquestioning that throughout the entire thing, he had given up his time without uttering a single complaint.

Also it had been plain as day that Hikaru loves the work and the work loves him. Although they were merely compiling an album and not working with actual fabric, Hikaru had been able to visualise the completed product as his mother would have wanted it to look, and had scribbled comments on post-it notes to attach to the margins of the album. That boldness has always been a part of Hikaru's attitude towards fashion and life – since he honestly loves his designs, it doesn't matter to him if other people don't like them; if he thinks something, he's going to say it and let the other person decide whether to accept it. While Kaoru wants to do things for no other reason than because he is passionate about them, he struggles with the negative impacts of receiving lacklustre reviews.

The both of them, the most similar of individuals, can be quite distinct from each other from time to time. For years they shut out everyone else, and as they've expanded their world they still haven't revealed their one big secret outside of their family – the most striking difference between them: the way that each of them moves through the design process. Even though they like the same things and favour the same aesthetic, they take different routes to arrive at the same destination.

Their father had reflected upon this when they were ten; he'd said that once a person has seen the twins in the actual design process, that person will henceforth be able to tell them apart. That doesn't mean watching them sew or sketch, but watching them bring something to life: developing the_ toile_. Then, he'd joked about how there's something about the way they work that reveals the core of a Hitachiin – their grandmother and ikebana, their mother and fashion, the twins and fashion-and-ikebana.

The twins had been horrified at those statements because they hadn't wanted to be found yet. In their fright, they had sworn off working in front of anyone but their family. For the past few years in the host club, the longing to be known has made them increasingly heedless – though they have not yet shown that part of themselves, Kaoru thinks that they will. One day. Maybe.

They're good at different things too. Possibly due to his proficiency with mathematics, Hikaru has always been excellent at geometric shapes and angular cuts. That's why Kaoru had tried asking for help in making Kyouya's scarf; his skill in this area is not poor but Hikaru surpasses him.

Admissions like these would have scorched Kaoru in the past, inflamed him with a sense of shame that they were not completely alike.

Kaoru feels quite disloyal at being unable to confess everything to Hikaru and drag him along by hook or by crook. He's afraid that a distance will develop between them and move him out of range of his brother, but he doesn't want to give up and stay where he is because then he'll move out of range of the other club members.

However, if he steals from Hikaru the chance to freely choose his own destiny, then what sort of loving brother will he be? Choices such as these must be consciously made by each individual, and some of these can be made only once in a lifetime. This must be how his mother is thinking, and that is why he has no right to take it away from Hikaru.

The album should be on its way to France now. School had let out not long ago; they are in their car, on their way to Kyouya's house.

Kyouya had sent out emails to everyone informing them of Kaoru's appointment as secretary; the appointment as successor was left unstated but all of them had read between the lines. Hikaru had stared at Kaoru for the longest time – eye-to-eye, mind-to-mind, heart-to-heart, twin-to-twin.

_Is this what you want?_

_Yes. I want to protect the things that are precious to me._

This is what Kaoru has decided: even though it is difficult, he will believe in their future.

He has made a promise to himself to exert the greatest effort to hold the seven of them together while waiting for their paths to lead them to the same place once again. If he wishes for something long enough, it will definitely come true eventually.

The Ootori compound is largely designed in the International Style of Modernism; the living areas and the areas dominated by Ootori-sama all reflect the 'form follows function' tenet of Modern architecture – extremely formal with all unnecessary aspects eliminated. Kaoru has always been privately amused at Kyouya's choice of postmodern architecture for his personal quarters as a reaction to the rest of the house – the understated wittiness behind the movement really suits him, especially the sly implication from the fact that postmodernism was developed to address the limitations of its predecessor.

When they enter Kyouya's room, they see that its owner and Tamaki are having a conversation inside. Tamaki looks agitated, colour high in his cheeks and muscles tense all over while Kyouya's lips are pressed tightly into a line. They stop talking abruptly; Kaoru doesn't need a clearer sign than this to indicate that he and/or Hikaru were the subjects of their conversation. He lets himself speculate about Tamaki's presence – did Kyouya invite him to join them for their planning session today?

At his side, Hikaru pulls himself together and apologises to Kyouya without delay. Kaoru cannot help but ruefully recall his own attempt to do the same. He squeezes Hikaru's hand, feeling very proud of him.

'Accepted," Kyouya says coolly. His demeanour does not soften as much as when he had acknowledged Kaoru's apology. "You are welcome to stay if you wish. Kaoru, we will start right away."

"Yes, Kyouya-senpai." Kaoru moves to the shelves to take out the required files before settling down in the same spot he was in on Sunday. Hikaru seemed undecided for a moment as to what he should do; he follows Kaoru and sits behind him on the sofa. Kyouya retrieves his laptop from his bag and joins Kaoru on the floor, in the same spot _he_ was in on Sunday.

"Call Ueda Megumi-san to inform her that I've found her lost earring in the club room," Kyouya directs, keeping his eyes fixed expectantly on Kaoru.

Understanding the purpose behind this examination, Kaoru whips out his new phone from his pocket, locates the name of the customer and turns his phone around to let Kyouya check that everything has been done accordingly. He is rewarded with a tiny smile for his diligence and asked to input his new number into Kyouya's club phone. Now they both have a personal phone and a club phone – and Kyouya has a business phone on top of that.

As Kaoru talks to Ueda Megumi, Tamaki and Kyouya begin going through the concept for their next few cosplays. They hold cosplays during two out of four host club sessions in a month – the other two Fridays are conducted while wearing school uniforms and allocated to the simpler pleasures of life. Kyouya is organising the September 24th cosplay session; Kaoru has to pay close attention and possibly pilfer some of Kyouya's contacts; he was never prohibited from doing so, as long as he can find out about them himself.

They are doing an Indian theme on 8th October, 4 weeks from now. It's been rejected numerous times in the past because of its extreme complexity. The traditional clothing of the Indians is bright, layered and heavily patterned; many accessories adorn the body, and the body itself is covered with intricate body art. The set must be suitably elaborate to accurately bring out the cultural vibe; furniture, drapery and (likely) animals will have to be specially sourced. The reason for such a choice at this particular time is transparent to Kaoru – he expects to be charged with full responsibility for the costuming. As that session will be their joint venture, Kyouya would then be free to supervise the construction of the set.

"Customers either send us an email or a text message, or they drop a form into the host club box to make bookings. We generally require that bookings be made by Wednesdays so that we have sufficient time to change any plans according to the number of customers. That number will always be greater when a cosplay is scheduled. At the close of school tomorrow, make sure that you empty the box and check the club's email inbox, and record all bookings for this Friday into the database. I will deal with the text messages for this week and officially replace my phone number with yours so that you may take over this duty from next week onwards."

Kaoru nods obligingly, not saying a word. It's oddly uncomfortable having Tamaki in the room. He doesn't really know how Tamaki fits into this dynamic of 'Kyouya-boss' and 'Kaoru-apprentice'. Tamaki dealing with serious club matters – in this room that Kaoru had seen them in – feels like a different person; he is currently sitting on the sofa beside Hikaru and behind Kyouya, flipping through the file containing details of all their previous cosplays.

"Kyouya, I was thinking we could do Mexican on the 24th. Have we done that before?" Tamaki asks slowly, deep in thought.

Kaoru isn't the only one feeling the awkwardness. He can hear the mental messages from Hikaru worrying away at how tense it feels. Tamaki had been terribly upset at what Hikaru had said to Kyouya – more upset than Kyouya, who looks as though he's moved past it; after all, Kyouya is the type of person to let some things slide; he wouldn't expend too much energy on the things that are trivial and unintentional.

Tamaki, in contrast, seems to let insults slide easily only when they are directed towards himself. He remembers any hurtful comments directed to the people he loves instead, and has difficulty letting go of the pain he feels.

The discussion between their seniors is really business-like and polished. The twins are staying out of it but they aren't staying silent, not when they have their special twin channel open for communication – Hikaru has been making comments about their seniors that are very funny and consoling, too. Kaoru can feel himself relaxing as he tangles his soul with his brother's, holding on tight.

He tells Hikaru his deduction about why he is feeling rather fidgety. It is because Tamaki is like the ex in this situation, since Tamaki has once occupied this trainee position. Hikaru roars with laughter, so much so that Kaoru's brain clatters around with the force of it. He tells Kaoru that he will check him into a mental asylum if he dates the Shadow King, and that sometimes he feels like doing just that to Haruhi, because even though Tamaki has many qualities, it is really unimaginable having to put up with his antics, alone, for the rest of a lifetime.

Kaoru tells him that he won't need to do that, since after a few years Haruhi will be checking herself in anyway. The both of them are sniggering heartily – in their minds only, of course – when out of the blue Kyouya issues a warning.

"Hikaru, I would appreciate it if you will stop distracting Kaoru."

They shut up at once.

"Kaoru, of the initial plans that Tamaki and I have brought up, how many of them will you be able to carry out?" No references to what those plans are – very conspicuous displeasure at Kaoru's carefree attitude.

4 weeks! Kaoru was meant to have 4 weeks to establish his network! Kyouya had said that he would take care of it until then! If it were just Kyouya and him, he would have said something; somehow, he doesn't want to whinge about it in front of Tamaki.

While their events do indeed have few commonalities, several things are essential and remain constant. He has started his search with those first to form a strong foundation. "I can provide the hairdresser, make-up artist, caterer, baker, music, flowers, and the doctors on call."

"I'm not looking for generic suppliers – can they manage Mexican-specific projects?"

"Yes," Kaoru says with absolute certainty. The hair and make-up stylists were the easiest contacts; their fashion house hires those that are versatile and at the pinnacle of their art. For a runway show, music is a common fixture, so Kaoru had asked his mother's HR department for their recommendations. Contacting a good florist had been laughably easy as well – he just called up his grandmother's ikebana students. As for the food, he had visited their family chefs for a lengthy and productive chat.

"Who are your doctors?" Tamaki asks as he turns towards Kyouya hesitantly. "I thought you said you didn't give Kaoru any of your contacts."

Kyouya hadn't.

Kaoru smiles cryptically at Tamaki, knowing full well Tamaki's feelings about their devilish expressions. "My doctors on call... well, only the best for the host club."

That was exactly what Kyouya had said, years ago, when asked the same question by the same person. Last night, Kaoru had been on the phone with Honey for about ten minutes, and Honey had told him that when he'd talked about finding suitable doctors. In fact, the doctors on call have not changed – Kaoru's contacts are Kyouya's contacts, except that now they will answer to more than one person.

Hotta is a _gem_.

Which reminds Kaoru, he has to ask their chef to bake a magnificent cake for Hotta. Hotta's wife loves western cakes. Hmm, he should send one to Honey as well for his tips on where to find good bakers.

By now, Kyouya must have figured out how Kaoru managed to obtain the contacts for the doctors. It is confirmed when he says with a smile hidden in his voice, "That's fine. I will organise it."

The Shadow King gives Tamaki a pointed look then, and suspicion blooms in Kaoru's mind as to the topic of that heated exchange earlier. Though a few pieces of the puzzle are still missing – if Kaoru had been asked to make a prediction, he would have bet on Tamaki being his supporter and Kyouya being the dissenter. Wouldn't Tamaki know that it is the Hitachiins' turn to be pushed forward, to move and to grow, otherwise they will be left behind?

Tamaki pats his head and smiles at him too, but in his eyes there are shadows lurking around the fondness.

From behind, Hikaru gives him a hug. _Brilliant as always, Ka-o-ru._

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**3. The Professional Conversation**  
><strong>Wednesday, 15 September 2010.<strong>

"I take it, from prior conversations, that you mean to undertake the task of liaising with the parents of the hosts?"

"You would have assigned it to me anyway," Kaoru snorts.

"Not true," Kyouya refutes. "Communicating with the hosts' parents, while very advantageous, does not constitute an indispensable part of running the club. Strictly speaking, as the club's employees are the hosts, there is no obligation on us to broaden the employee benefits to include their families. I do it because the merits are manifold. You are not constrained to follow all of my precedents – do you not wish to make your own mark during your reign?"

"_Employees?!_ Is that how you view us – your lackeys?! And – _what_ benefits?!"

"Of course not. Indeed, I myself am a humble servant of our club. None of us is the boss of others," Kyouya says with a preposterous lack of irony. "All of you have received _plenty_ of benefits. The cost of food, clothing and transport is always on the house. You are at liberty to take for yourself whatever articles of clothing catch your fancy; leftover fabric for the costumes are claimed by you and Hikaru; Haruhi has been bringing leftover food home for a year; Honey-senpai has had a bed specially purchased for him; our club has constantly accommodated Mori-senpai's kendo commitments even though kendo is second tier; basically, has the club not indulged every asinine whim that has crossed your minds?"

Oooh, scathing. "So… what sort of benefits have our parents been getting?"

"Regular status reports, certainly," Kyouya leers, "together with photographs of us at our events as mementos, and peace of mind that their riotous and unruly children are being well looked after."

_Photographs…?_

Kaoru gasps in mortification. "You! It was _you_! I'd wondered how my mum got her hands on those! She keeps a few of them in her purse in case she needs a good laugh, she says! Do you know that my dad went and had it framed in his office?!"

"Oh? I'm sorry if it's caused you any distress," Kyouya apologises insincerely. "I've found that parents draw a great deal of comfort from news of their children. Whatever information I send to your parents, I send only to alleviate their worry."

Kaoru is beginning to realise that there is a part of Kyouya that really rather earnestly enjoys tormenting other people. He's always known that Kyouya's enemies, such as Kuze, are natural targets for this predilection; but he hadn't always known how much Kyouya likes pushing that boundary with people he considers friends.

Kaoru has been speculating as to why that is the case – someone as observant as Kyouya, with an intelligence and memory to match a supercomputer, must have a lot of witty and caustic remarks perpetually sprinting through his head, but they are all of them bound by social constraints. It's almost as though Kyouya wants to see them acknowledge their familiarity with each other, as though he takes a perverse joy in seeing that they are willing to tolerate this from him – that they let it pass because they accept him.

"How kind of you, Kyouya-senpai. You never know, I might be able to repay you now that I arrange the photos and contact the parents."

There is a glimmer of contempt in Kyouya's eyes that sends out a very clear message: _I'd like to see you try_.

Frankly, even if Kaoru has the daring to be so informal with Ootori-sama, the likelihood of him capturing Kyouya in an embarrassing situation is little to none. Kaoru puts on an act sometimes; because he loves and savours the experience of it, he has mastered control over it, but Kyouya is something else entirely – the control _is_ him. When most people are angry or raising their voice, they would look out of control; Kyouya had done so with Tamaki's father, yet that uncontrolled behaviour had had a controlled feel to it. Everything Kyouya wanted to convey was exactly what was conveyed, nothing more and nothing less.

Kaoru wonders if anyone can break that control. Maybe Tamaki has...?

"Your thoughts have strayed," Kyouya states intuitively. "I like people who think for themselves, but not at the expense of accomplishing the matter at hand."

It's becoming a recurring occurrence, the way Kyouya easily detects even the minutest of changes in his attention. He is sure that he had plastered on his studious face and the expression had held, but it offers no defence.

There's something about being around Kyouya – the peerless thinker – that makes Kaoru want to think. He automatically attempts to emulate Kyouya's depth of thought; it soothes him to know that the mental ground he treads is not an empty wilderness but carefully charted terrain by the most meticulous cartographer possible. The problem here is the disparity in the speed in which they grasp and process the information available. His senior is too far ahead in terms of skill.

"We will call all the parents one-by-one, starting from both Haninozuka-samas. I will introduce you as their new first point of contact for the host club then I will hand the phone over to you. None of them have been told anything about what the club has done since the re-opening. You may furnish them with whatever details you wish. I'm sure you know you have to select your information judiciously because all of them are busy people, and you must take into account that however funny you may find something, you_ cannot_ jeopardise the parent-child relationship. We are not acting as informers or tattle tales."

"Of course," Kaoru agrees. "Anyway, some of those memories are important to me and so I want to keep them for ourselves only."

Kyouya gives no visible sign that he shares Kaoru's sentiments. Still, Kaoru is somehow sure that he also feels this way. "Are we calling my parents?"

"Yes. If you prefer it, I can continue as their contact," Kyouya allows.

"I think... I want to do it," Kaoru says without providing reasons. He finds himself on the receiving end of an appraising stare.

"Very well."

There is one parent in particular that Kaoru has questions about. He doesn't know what he'll do if he has to contact that parent. He steadies himself to ask, "Will I have to contact Ootori-sama?"

"No."

He notices that Kyouya also does not explain himself.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**4. The Ambivalently Professional Conversation**  
><strong>Thursday, 16 September 2010.<strong>

"Done!" Kaoru lets out a victorious whoop. His portfolio is finally completed – 205 _croquis_ in all, 63 done over a week and a half along with 142 of his past work, specially selected. He has been working on it so much that calluses have formed on his fingers from gripping the drawing instruments – liners, pens and markers of assorted colours and varying thickness. His hand has almost forgotten how to unclench itself; it hurts from the cramps. He is so sleep-deprived that he feels concussed.

Despite everything, the pride he feels cannot be bought by all the wealth of the host club combined.

Kyouya doesn't bother glancing at Kaoru. "May I ask why it was necessary for you to do your personal work in my room?"

At the bottom level of said room, Kaoru has claimed a spot measuring about 2 metres square and invaded the premises with his stash of art materials and documents. He ignores Kyouya's tart question, knowing that sometimes his senior feels the need to raise objections on principle. They've so often besieged Kyouya's room that it's a moot point to ask why any of them might be present at any given point of time.

Plus, Kaoru has the most legitimate reason to be here: these colossal and tiring tasks that have yet to be carried out. It just so happens that Kaoru needs to complete Roman's tasks on top of Kyouya's; if he didn't find a way to do them more-or-less simultaneously, he wouldn't meet any of the deadlines. That is why he has been memorising the customers' details while sketching. Each line of the profiles is given the once-over; he mumbles the information back to himself as he draws. Lather, rinse and repeat.

"Kyouya-senpai, do you have any way that I can fasten these together?" At home, in the room beside the main atelier, they have a large industrial-strength binder to facilitate the compilation of various albums, portfolios, indices and archival documents that are ancillary to their work. Kaoru doubts that the Ootoris would have such a machine lying around. Every one of the two hundred and five sketches is irreplaceable; he doesn't want to risk bringing the separate sheets of paper home and scattering or misplacing them.

His senior lets out a put-upon sigh and jabs a button with his pen. "Tell whichever one to appear to do it."

Aijima takes the loose-leaf _croquis_ from a grateful Kaoru and swears his life to their protection. With that poker face, Aijima could have said anything to Kaoru and he would have believed it with the gullibility of a two-year-old.

Maybe he should inquire into the possibility of conscripting a Team of his own.

Unfortunately Kaoru can see no end in sight for the chore of memorising everything in the database.

"Chiba Yuki, Class 1-A, chess club member, won the school science award... Hino Shiki, Class 1-A, champion swimmer and archer, from the old and esteemed Hino family, youngest of nine siblings... Sato Sayuri, Class 1-A, ranked fourth academically, musician, plays the piano, cello and drums, very strict parents... Tsukahara Reiko, Class 1-A, ranked tenth academically, drama club member... has a crush on Hitachiin Hikaru?! It says here: 'likely to nominate the twins but may display jealousy towards Kaoru'? Who is this girl and how do you know?!"

"Her attraction towards Hikaru was immediately apparent to me. Indeed, would have been apparent to the blind."

"Is it a fangirl type of – "

"No. She did not display the same laxness as the majority regarding the mixing up of the "traditional pairings" of our club dynamics. Nor did she appear to be devoted to any one pairing. In a rather sneaky manner, she interspersed her questions about Hikaru among the general chatter of others even though she was burning with curiosity."

"Might not be Hikaru she's after. Sometimes they – "

"Her knowledge of the traits that differentiate the both of you is quite extensive. She knows everything in the public domain and a little more."

"How do you know? When did you find out all this?" Kaoru presses, feeling unnerved.

"All her actions point to a keen interest in Hikaru. It was the only reasonable conclusion from a rather lengthy impromptu Q&A session we were forced to hold. She was part of a group of the new first year girls that ambushed Tamaki and me during lunch on one of the days that you were trying to avoid me."

Kaoru cringes somewhat self-consciously. "Ah, yeah. Right."

"I do not think it is cause for concern. After all, this is not the first time a girl has fancied either you or your brother. She will be present during this Friday's club – if you become aware of any hostility towards you that makes you uncomfortable, come to me."

The club has not really had to turn away troublesome customers; with the exception of the girl who tried to bully Haruhi, they have all been well-mannered and kind. Kaoru doesn't know whether he has acquired the jurisdiction to evict a customer for misbehaviour, but it's reassuring to know that Kyouya will handle it.

"This is another area that you will have to cope with. Throughout your tenure as secretary and/or president, you will discover that many intrusive questions will be asked about the hosts, some of which will shock you at how candid the girls can be. The ones with a crush tend to treat me – and now you too – as an information outlet; they will dress up their inquiries and refer obliquely to the targets of their infatuation."

Kaoru looks up in alarm. "What sort of questions?"

"Exceedingly private ones," Kyouya says woodenly. "Mostly about any past relationships we may have had, our criteria of what makes a good partner, and our romantic or sexual experiences and preferences."

Kaoru's eyes have gone as wide as saucers. "You can't be serious."

"We are _teenagers_, Kaoru. Their curiosity is universal to all humans. There's no requirement that I give them an accurate answer, or that I even give an answer in the first place. The key is learning how to fend them off without incurring their wrath."

"...What sort of answers have you been giving them?" Kaoru demands uneasily.

"How do you think I should answer a customer who asks whether Hikaru wears boxers or briefs, Kaoru?" Kyouya taunts lazily.

Kaoru _stares_. "No way. None of them would come up to ask like this. No one in our school would. That's social suicide. They have their reputation to think about."

"Oh, most definitely. Therefore, they have their questions written down for them and put into our feedback box with step-by-step instructions on how I should write back. Very few of them would ask outright like Hoshakuji Renge. Actually I find that any answers I give are immediately reflected in the latest doujinshi, so perhaps it's really just about artistic accuracy," says Kyouya, too amused for Kaoru's peace of mind, especially because Kaoru knows that Kyouya owns a copy of every single doujin that has ever been produced involving anyone in the host club. Kyouya's rationale for it clearly runs along the lines of how imperative it is to keep an eye on such publications, but that kind of... _material_... can make even Kaoru blush. These fangirls really have the most staggering creativity. At any rate, this is not Kaoru's biggest concern. His biggest concern is this: "Kyouya-senpai, do you actually know the answers to these types of questions?"

_And if he does, how did he come upon the knowledge...?_

He has the most horrible feeling that Kyouya is laughing in his face even though there's no proof. Then he realises why: it's the smile in the eyes._ That_ smile.

"I hope you are not carried away by unfounded worries that I have spies posted all around you monitoring every moment of your life. I do, in fact, know the answers. If you will stop to think about it, you will realise that I have simply inferred them from a combination of what I see, what I hear, and what I know. Here is an example: I see that your heart is never apart from your twin. I hear that you and he were entirely unapproachable before Tamaki. I know that I have been around you constantly since then. Put them together and the result yielded is: obviously, you've never been in a reciprocal romantic relationship."

It really is quite a feat that Kyouya manages to make so many things '_obviously_' so. Kaoru knows that one of the most formidable things to accomplish is to make the difficult look easy – he tries to do it every day in fashion, an industry which deeply understands that people want to see only the finished product and not the laborious process.

He sighs in resignation. "And the rest? You know all this stuff about them too? I don't suppose you'll tell me any of it?"

"Haven't I told you the method? I'll give you another hint: there's no need for any prolonged investigation. What you know of us from the past 3 years should be sufficient. I won't be surprised if you figure it out right now, because the answer is very instinctive. Whatever the customers think, the seven of us are very uncomplicated people."

_Really?_

Kaoru's instinctual answer is that the seven of them have only ever had each other. None of them are strangers to loneliness, but – how _can_ it be? They're all extremely attractive!

"There's doubt in your eyes. Learn to abandon your hesitance when you've arrived at the only possible conclusion. In the words of the immortal Sherlock Holmes: 'When you've eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth'."

He can't believe it. Kyouya spoon-fed the answer to him?

Voice devoid of inflection, Kaoru says, "In class 2-D, there is a boy called Nakamura Kaito; senpai surely knows of him? He has a face like a decomposed lizard and the personality of one, but he's now dating his fifth girlfriend."

Kyouya actually laughs, but neither of them wants to say anything more on this topic. Instead, Kyouya expresses his approval that Kaoru keeps on top of school gossip. They need to know who is dating whom, so that the hosts will not create unwanted enmities with other people in the school. One effective way is to build relationships with teachers and staff in the school, especially the nurses and cleaners, to enable information-sharing.

A few repulsive students – Kyouya mentions some examples – treat the staff as inferiors under their parents' instructions. Kaoru has of course observed such a thing; in Ouran, it is not uncommon for staff members to have to give way to the students. Against such a backdrop, Kyouya tells him, their courtesy towards the staff will be out of the ordinary and long engraved in their minds. There are a lot of merits to be gained in treating the staff well; he wants the host club to have that distinction, and that is why the club hires its own cleaning staff for jobs beyond the normal scope of the school cleaners, including any fallout from pranks pulled by club members.

This revelation stuns Kaoru a little, and makes him feel abashed – he wonders how long Kyouya has been left alone to sort out the aftermath of their messes.

Messes... like the one he'd made when he'd announced the club relaunch without permission. He finds then that he does urgently want something answered – "Senpai, I thought you'd stay angry for a longer time than you actually did."

Kyouya raises an eyebrow at him. "Shall I return to being angry at you?"

"No... No. There's no need. No."

"Besides, you are serving your punishment now, are you not?"

So that is how Kyouya sees it – unsurprising from a person who constantly seeks to transform every setback into an advantage. Kaoru did think that the ruthlessness with which so many tasks were set had been a bit extreme, but having had no prior exposure to Business Kyouya led him to be cautious in making assumptions. Actually, the more he analyses it, the more it makes sense. Staying angry expends a great deal of energy and time that can be better utilised elsewhere.

And possibly – a real possibility – because Kyouya needs all the allies he can get in his climb to the top. Their benefit to each other has always been more than the emotional; the cold, hard, corporate side lingers permanently around them, entangling its wispy tendrils into all aspects of their interaction.

Kaoru returns to studying the profiles as he marvels at the way commoners conduct their friendships. Haruhi and Arai had no other purpose for being friends apart from... well, _being friends_. Such an odd notion! He wonders what Kyouya makes of all of this but he does not ask; his senior seems to want to maintain a rigid environment while they are working together.

The severity of their meetings has wavered every now and then in the past few days alone only to be quickly re-established. Kaoru's not fond of it. To him, professionalism does not equate to being dreary and strict. Everyone in his mother's offices is forever having a rollicking good time, uproarious and loud, and that doesn't stop them from producing exquisite work on time. He believes it is the marriage of emotional and artistic freedom with discipline and hard work that gives a great deal of fulfilment to his mother's employees. This is not his place, though; he would be out of line if he tried to introduce his philosophy here.

For convenience's sake as well as his growing affection for Kyouya's Team and his genuine liking for his senpai, Kaoru works here. He beams at them whenever he can, especially in greeting; he does not wish to change them and their work attitude but he wants them to be happy. His mother once told him that the way to elicit happiness from other people is to be cheerful himself. People are mirrors – they reflect what they see and give back what they've received.

Hotta in particular has really taken to him, and he in turn has become very attached to Hotta. It had moved him when plates of ferociously sweet treats had begun materialising in his corner, ready and waiting for him as soon as he arrives with Kyouya after school. Thought has been put into their preparation – many of the sweets are or closely resemble those that he had selected when he'd first gone crying to them for help.

Kyouya is frequently none too happy about the way Kaoru gazes at the sweets with warm, fuzzy feelings of love. In Kaoru's opinion, that's hardly his problem. One of the sweets tastes like concentrated maple syrup and this is the only place he knows to find them, so he'll eat his fill.

As a matter of fact, his senior is currently broadcasting vibes of exasperation. "Where are you up to in your task?"

"Mmm," Kaoru licks the sugar off his index finger. "I'm done with all the year twos and threes. That wasn't too hard because we've already known most of them personally for at least two years. I've just started on the year ones, starting from class A. I prefer memorising them by class. There's more structure that way."

"I see. Class 2-B, Yaji Tomoko. What do you know about her?"

"Ehhhh! You said two weeks!" Kaoru complains.

"If you have time to worship those sweets, you have time to work faster," Kyouya tells him mercilessly. "Yaji Tomoko."

"Ranked first academically in her class. Her family owns the broadcasting conglomerate Dai'an Network, which includes the commercial Channel 2 and pay-tv news channels. She is an amateur artist and is passionate about graphic and web design," Kaoru recites dutifully.

There isn't the barest indication of approval from the other boy. "Have you uncovered anything about her or her family background?"

"You really are a tyrant, aren't you, Kyouya-sensei. It's only been _three_ days since you gave me these assignments!" Now Kaoru is starting to see exactly why Tamaki whines and wails so much when he is around Kyouya. The urge to follow his example is incredibly strong.

"Quite," Kyouya smirks. "Therefore, what have you found?"

_Damn it._ He groans in annoyance, sounding frightfully like Tamaki for a moment. "She is secretly dating Amane Atsushi from Class 2-C. To throw her parents off her scent, she books host club sessions and then pretends to feel unwell at the last minute so that she can spend that time with Amane-san instead. She knows that her family will never support this relationship because Amane-san's elder brother is a notorious money-grabber who sold out his family to obtain a contract worth US$3 billion with Spinsteel International. The Amane family is still trying to crawl back from the actions of their traitorous son."

"I don't know why you make a fuss when I quiz you even though you already know the answers." Kyouya caps his pen, places it on the table and walks over to Kaoru. "Good job. The password to unlock Yaji-san's page is 'AA2CSpinsteel'."

"_Ohhh..."_ Kaoru intones. "I think I know the form that the other passwords will take. Very ingenious, senpai."

Kyouya hums pleasedly as he scrutinises the plate of treats. A frown creases his forehead. "This Hotta... I will tell the rest not to give him dinner tonight. See how he likes it when other people are given food and he is left out."

A laugh escapes Kaoru, so sudden that he could not prevent it. Was _that_ the cause behind Kyouya's disgruntlement? He had thought it was because Kyouya disdained sweet food!

"You can have some if you want," Kaoru offers generously, snickering all the while.

Kyouya gives a slight sniff. "I disdain sweet food."

Kaoru laughs hard enough that he eventually flops to the floor ungracefully. What a snub Hotta has inadvertently dealt his master! The food provided is flagrantly not for Kyouya's tastes – Kaoru hadn't realised how much it revealed of Hotta's bias until now.

"But – " he wheezes when he finally catches his breath, "Tachibana-san and Aijima-san knew! Tachibana-san helped to prepare this plate yet they're still all sweets!"

A flash of genuine astonishment crosses Kyouya's face, very quickly veiled as he gives Kaoru a shrewd once-over. "To send me a message, yes. That way, they save themselves the effort of proving the veracity of their assertions. If I had been alerted through words, they would have had to go to the additional bother of adducing evidence," Kyouya breaks it down for him.

"... A message?" Kaoru is confused.

Kyouya takes on a rather predatory smile. "They want me to know that Hotta has taken a shine to you. They neither stopped him from these subtle expressions of his favour, nor did they compensate for his inconsideration of my welfare by fixing me a plate. In a nutshell, they were advising me that should you harbour any ill-will towards me, the weak link in our defences will be Hotta because of his affection for you."

Ummm... _"What?!"_

Quiet laughter and half-lidded eyes create a sinister feel to Kyouya's next words. "What I'm interested in knowing," he prompts, "is how you knew Tachibana had a hand in preparing your treat."

"Aah? That's easy – because the plate had a balanced mix of sweets. The powdery sweets make the mouth very dry and the moist sweets are too sticky and difficult to swallow," Kaoru says as he points to the sweets in question. "I take forever to finish the hard sweets but I can finish the gummies in a minute. And if I keep eating too much of the supersweet ones that I like, I go on a sugar high and can't really do my work, but I hate eating the bland ones by themselves. All the sweets were arranged in an alternating pattern – dry sticky dry, hard soft hard, sweet bland sweet. Tachibana-san did that. He thinks of everything."

"You believe Tachibana was the one? It could easily have been Aijima," Kyouya contradicts him nonchalantly.

_Why is he asking this?_ He must know even better than Kaoru which of his servants would do what.

Kaoru shakes his head firmly in response. "If they really were trying to inform you about that, then I know for sure it was Tachibana-san. Only he could have. Tachibana-san is a 'big picture' person. His predictions of how things will happen are a large-scale type of guess, with a focus on the main elements and how the sequences of events unfold. So he probably saw that if I am eating the sweets when I am doing my work, I wouldn't really look at which sweet I was taking; I would just take the sweet nearest to me. Aijima-san would have just provided tea instead of arranging the sweets because he's a very straightforward person and he always sees the most direct route to achieve his aims; but, Tachibana-san would have considered what it means to provide tea _and_ food to me while leaving nothing for you, and so he wouldn't have allowed it because it's too disrespectful."

Instead of addressing Kaoru's answer, Kyouya seizes one of the most flavourless treats, pops it in his mouth and immediately winces at how sweet it is. "_This_ is bland? I suppose Hotta chose them," he laments. "Ah, when put beside each other in comparison, Hotta really is useless, isn't he? He just doesn't think about all these important things at all."

If Kaoru was not sure then, he is sure now: it's a test.

"Kyouya-senpai, that's completely untrue and I know you know it. I think... Even though he doesn't look anything like it, Hotta is a 'details' person. All of these sweets are the flavours that I like, but I've never said anything about it to him," he says, gesturing to the plate. "I mean, that guy knows absolutely everything there is to know about his wife and he buys only the specific groceries that she wants in the exact quantity that she asks for."

That kind of dedication to detail had left Kaoru not knowing whether to be impressed or horrified.

"Also, sometimes he gets so nervous about the smallest things and he starts splitting hairs about it until Tachibana-san asks him to shut up. The problem is when he is too particular about something and forgets about other things – that's why he didn't make food for you, and not because he's careless.

"In fact, I bet – Hotta has probably picked up some things about you that the other two haven't, but it doesn't occur to him to tell them because he himself thinks that they are more capable than him. He views himself as lesser to them; he doesn't know that they complement each other. That's why – oh! – That's why you prefer for them to act as a unit, don't you! That time, when we were going to fly to Karuizawa to find Haruhi; Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai hadn't yet arrived and Tono wanted to dash off first with Aijima-san as his bodyguard, but Aijima-san said that you don't like them going their separate ways so everyone had to wait!" Kaoru exclaims excitedly. "Do I pass, senpai?"

A frighteningly authentic smile stretches across Kyouya's face. Without replying, he snags another bland sweet and begins to walk back to his worktable.

_Well, what does that mean? A bit of praise will really boost my performance, you know_.

Deciding that there's nothing for it, Kaoru lowers his voice to a smooth, cultured tone and imitates, "With flying colours, Kaoru. The password to unlock the profile is 'TAH3TeamKO'."

Kyouya stops walking and turns around to face him, his eyes gleaming enigmatically. "Smart aleck. _Do your work_."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**5. The Marginally Professional Conversation**  
><strong>Friday, 17 September 2010.<strong>

Club is over at last, and it is finally the weekend. _Finally_.

Or it will be as soon as this meeting with Kyouya is concluded. Hikaru had gone home first, promising to send an email to Haruhi on his behalf as well.

Today, Kyouya wants Kaoru to observe what he does when he closes the accounts for the session. Such a task doesn't really require Kaoru to be practically engaged in doing anything except to sit and watch... Which is a huge problem because he can't remember the last time he felt so exhausted.

Kaoru has aged a century in this one week. On average, he has slept for only an hour and a half each night.

On and on Kyouya tells him about club related things, and Kaoru tries and tries to keep his eyes open. His senior's voice is really rather beautiful – tones calm and sleek, pronunciation impeccable and elegant. It occurs to him that he's never heard Kyouya sing; he wants to, now.

_Yawn. _

Too beautiful, maybe? The voice is soporific and lullabyish. All the words are a jumbled fog in Kaoru's mind; that can only be his fault because Kyouya never slurs.

"Kyouya-senpai," he speaks in an attempt to keep himself awake. "You mean the club's funds have always been so precarious? Look, your writing here says that the funds only ever break even. I thought we'd make profits. Why didn't you ever tell us about it? Or, or... stop... stop us from spending so much."

That's not very good that his breath had come out so laboriously for the simple act of talking. He hadn't known before today that this is how tiredness really feels; at the moment he has shut down all of his physical processes except the basic ones like breathing, blinking, etc.

Kyouya gives him a long, measured stare. "No, what we make is just sufficient to cover our expenses. Should I have said anything? As long as I manage it, it will never fail."

Kaoru giggles somewhat raggedly; then, thinking that his senior wouldn't like it that he's being so unprofessional, he averts his gaze and starts looking for Usa-chan to cuddle.

Oh, right. It's Friday. Honey has repossessed Usa-chan.

Well that doesn't matter because he should be doing something else apart from looking for Usa-chan now. Which he'll do as soon as he remembers what he has to do.

_Big yawn._

Wait, what does he have to do...?

"Sorry. Carry on," he grins goofily.

Kyouya looks utterly nonplussed. After a moment, he snaps his file shut and begins to clean up. "Kaoru, pack your things. I'll give you a lift home."

For the second time in two weeks, he sits and watches Kyouya tidy the club room. A minute passes before the words sink in. "Haaah? Don't we have to – "

"Pack. Home. Now."

It's costs too much energy to argue, so Kaoru does as he is told and is led out of the school by Kyouya.

In the car, he decides to ask Kyouya whether or not he sings. A choking sound comes from the front passenger seat that sounds like Hotta when _he_ sings.

Instead of answering, Kyouya rests his hand on Kaoru's forehead and demands to know how much he's been sleeping.

"I don't know," Kaoru whimpers softly at the thought of having to think.

"Tachibana, change course to our house. Call a doctor to wait for us there," Kyouya orders.

"Who's sick?" Kaoru wants to know.

"Hush," Kyouya murmurs gently. "Close your eyes and sleep. I'll wake you when we arrive."

At that, Kaoru tries to heave himself up to sit straight. "Can't. I've been wanting to ask you some questions! What are you going to do after high school? Can I still call you if I need help? You see, I – "

Kyouya claps his hand over Kaoru's mouth, effectively preventing him from babbling on. They gaze at each other seriously, and his senior drops his hand when Kaoru doesn't struggle against him. The instant he does so, however, Kaoru starts talking again. "If you come back to Japan during your university holidays, can you join us for club? I can commence a honorary members scheme so that all of you can – "

Again he is interrupted; this time Kyouya clasps the back of Kaoru's neck with one hand and brings him forward, tucking his junior's head into the crook of his shoulder. "Quiet. I can't get a word in edgewise if you keep rambling on."

The quick jerk had made Kaoru slightly dizzy. He stays silent obediently, enjoying the cool, comforting hand at the base of his neck; its fingers slowly stroking the ends of his spiky hair.

"The aim for us in doing all this is to ensure that you can manage by yourself by the end of this year, Kaoru."

Alarmed, he tries to sit up again, to protest that he does understand their aims, but just in case anything crops us that no one else knows how to solve – what should he do then?

His senior must have felt his body tense up, and in response exerts more pressure to keep him down. "Yes, all right. Yes. You may call if you wish," he capitulates.

Reassured and worn out, Kaoru slumps against Kyouya. They travel in silence for a while as he looks out of the windows hazily. He doesn't know how much time has passed before he realises that the scenery is not the familiar one on the way home. It takes him another five minutes after that to recognise the road to Kyouya's house.

"Are we going to your house to continue the meeting?" he mutters weakly.

He feels surprise course through the body he is leaning on. "Silly creature. Of course not. You need to take some medicine and sleep. I've instructed Aijima to prepare the guest room for you."

_He... did? When did that happen?_

"Hikaru – "

" – will be informed. Aijima will call him. I thought it best for you to stay since you will be coming to my house tomorrow morning at any rate. Unless, you wish to go home? Do you have any work to complete for your mother?"

He shakes his head drowsily. The most pressing jobs he has are those given by Kyouya. The tasks that Roman had given him are done; Roman will need time to review Kaoru's work, and such time will only be available after the all-important fashion show. A copy of Kaoru's portfolio has been sent to the Japan office – this Sunday, he is to meet another of his mother's deputies, Saejima Ren, who is based in the country. The both of them will be his principal teachers in fashion at the current time. One must earn the position of being Hitachiin Yuzuha's pupil.

Also, there's no need to call Honey tonight as they've already met in club. They've been phoning each other daily; sometimes they chat for a few hours, other times they're just checking in and hang up after five minutes. He can talk freely with Honey, safe in the knowledge that his friend will respect all his confidences and confide in him in turn.

"No. I'm done for now," he hums happily. "I hope that Roman thinks I've done well. If I work really hard, I might be able to ask my mum for permission to attend the fashion week in New York in February. Then we can visit Haruhi and celebrate her birthday with her."

"'We'? February is during the school term. Should you be permitted to go, Hikaru would still have no reason to go on this trip. I was under the impression that Hikaru is not involved in these projects that you're doing for your mother," Kyouya says lucidly.

Clearly Kaoru hadn't thought that through properly. "You're too smart for your own good, senpai," he groans in consternation. "Doesn't matter. I'll ask to go during December then. I'll say that we're going to check out some of the fashion schools. It wouldn't hurt to fully explore our options – Parsons and Pratt are quality schools on the east coast. That's quite close to Haruhi."

Kyouya sighs and whispers softly, "Tamaki is really worried about this part of you."

"What?" Kaoru mumbles, not catching what his senior had said.

He feels Kyouya exhale amusedly. "I intend to go to the US soon, too."

Kaoru jerks lightly, his curiosity sparked.

"I will be going to several places though most of the time will be spent in the New England area. If possible, I may be able to do the interviews that the universities require as part of the admission process. It's still in the planning stage so don't alert the others or they'll insist on tagging along," Kyouya finishes wearily.

"It'll be great if we can go together! Host Club in America!" Kaoru hurrahs.

"That is precisely the sort of thing I am trying to avoid."

"You're so humourless, Kyouya-senpai," Kaoru teases. Try as he might, he still feels an anxious ache when he thinks about them splitting up – Kyouya left all alone, continents away; or will he have company with him? "When you go there to study, will your team go with you?"

"They have families here, Kaoru."

"No way! You really intend to stay there all by yourself?" Kaoru cries. "You can't leave them! Tachibana-san lives and breathes for you, you know."

Another choking sound emerges from the front part of the car.

Kaoru can feel tremors rumbling through the person beside him. Kyouya is... laughing?

Before he can lift his head to check it out, the doors on both sides are swung open.

"Kyouya-sama, Kaoru-sama, we have arrived," Tachibana says austerely.

As they step out of the car, Kyouya makes the effort to go around to his side to catch him and support him into the house even though Hotta is flitting about fretfully.

All four of Kyouya and his Team watch over him like a hawk as the doctor prescribes rest and some medicine, as he has his dinner, as he takes the medicine. They think of everything that he will need, from pyjamas to a toothbrush, and escort him to his room, bidding him goodnight.

The stuffy professionalism of the Ootori house seems to recede with each visit, eroded by the inexorable sands of time.

Kaoru smiles to himself as he falls asleep.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

_Continued in Part B_


	6. Chapter 3B

**CHAPTER THREE(B)**

**Beware the Shadow Boss!**

.

**Intermission.**

"Hello? Kao-chan? How was your day?"

"It was great, Honey-senpai. I have good news! Our mother said that the album Hikaru and I made was really exceptional work! I'm so happy! How was yours?"

"As usual! Classes are really fun. Do you enjoy having Usa-chan with you?"

"Yes! I will try my best to take care of it!"

"Okay! Takashi and I miss all of you so much."

"We miss you too, senpai! We'll call each other at this time tomorrow again?"

"Of course, Kao-chan! Bye for now!"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**6. The Marginally Personal Conversation**  
><strong>Tuesday, 21 September 2010.<strong>

He can't take it anymore.

This crick in his neck. It's making him feel particularly homicidal.

Extricating himself from the mountain of books and files he's buried under, he stands and stretches in relief, popping and cracking all his joints back into place.

He tries not to do it too often because the sound seems to bother Kyouya. Kyouya himself never produces any of these sounds while stretching; Kaoru thinks it's because Kyouya doesn't know how to stretch properly despite working so much and so hard, and therefore the reason behind the tautness in his back and shoulders.

Over the past few days, he has discovered yet another major benefit of working in Kyouya's room – whenever there is anything he does not understand in his school work, he needs only ask his surprisingly obliging teacher.

"Ne, Kyouya-senpai, I don't know how you manage to cope with doing so much all the time," he remarks.

"Ah, Kaoru, I don't know how you manage to bring all of your unrelated work into my room each time," Kyouya retaliates.

Half of Kaoru's personal library has made its way into his ever expanding spot. It can't be helped since he needs his reference manuals for fashion and art, his textbooks for school work and his fiction books for inspiration. Added to that is the fact that he's found it helpful to have hard copies of some of the host club documents, printed notes of his research into the customers' backgrounds, and printout tables of the contacts that he is either considering or has already approached.

Also in the mix is a laptop specifically for work, as recommended by Kyouya; and a graphics tablet must be attached to the laptop if Kaoru is to be at all productive. The other sundries are necessities of the disciplines of art and design, which require a ghastly amount of materials and tools.

He doesn't think Kyouya minds – not really. He's probably been broken in by everything that Tamaki has done before.

"Fuyumi-san thinks I'm good for you, senpai," Kaoru sasses. "She was worried that you might become lonely because Tono is always tied up with business matters lately."

Fuyumi and Yuuichi had joined them for dinner last night. Kaoru had felt it inappropriate to stay as he is an outsider, but they'd convinced him that it would be fine so long as Ootori-sama is away on his business trip. It had generated a wholly unanticipated sense of pity within him that the two eldest siblings have to sneak about behind their father's back. He'd known that Fuyumi risks rebuke every time she attempts to visit her younger brothers; what he doesn't understand is why Yuuichi would be at pains to conceal certain things from Ootori-sama. As far as Kaoru is aware, Yuuichi's weekly breakfasts are valued by all members of the household.

Something in Fuyumi's expression yesterday had caused him to think that she feels quite a lot of sorrow over this situation as well. He had not been able to decide if it would be kinder to probe or to let her hide these emotions. In the end, much though he'd wanted to, he had not. She isn't his sister and he's not part of their family.

Yuuichi had turned out to be amiable and welcoming; a far cry from the way Akito usually behaves towards him. Kaoru has read enough of people to recognise that Yuuichi had smiled frequently at him even though his face had remained completely expressionless. It was unnatural, similar to the way Kyouya looks like in posed photographs; habitual, that Yuuichi's face no longer remembers how to curve its lips upwards. All the same Kaoru sensed some form of goodwill towards him.

It's obvious why Kaoru feels bothered by them. He can't imagine a world in which Hikaru would rate their parents so highly above him that he would stand by while his twin is feeling upset. It scares him that he may ever be as solitary as these Ootoris are. This family is on a collision course of epic proportions; the worst thing about it is that they all _know _this is where they are headed for.

Somebody... Everybody is going to get hurt.

He knows that he must never make any mention of his observations to Kyouya – that'll just get him thrown out of the house. Kyouya likes to solve his own problems and Ootoris are famously good at handling everything anyway.

"Nee-san is too nosy. There's nothing good about you taking root and growing organically like a tree in this house," Kyouya says flatly.

It sounds like a barefaced claim to Kaoru. In reality, he believes that Kyouya does miss Tamaki. Just because Kaoru is unable to put his finger on what it is that leads him to this opinion doesn't invalidate the truth of it. Alongside that supposition is the suspicion that Fuyumi and Yuuichi know it too.

No, that's not entirely accurate. Kaoru knows that Fuyumi definitely knows it; he suspects Yuuichi of knowing it. Truth be told, Yuuichi is so _impossibly boring_ on the surface that he seems like a very interesting person to get to know. Of course there are people who are genuinely utterly obedient towards their parents, doing nothing more and nothing less than is expected of them, living and dying by society's expectations as they inherit their wealth from the generation before them and pass it on to the generation that comes after like a mere cog in a machine. By all appearances Yuuichi looks like one of them. Eldest of the Ootori four and the very picture of what it means to have been raised by Ootori Yoshio. Perfect credentials, perfect wife, perfect kids, everything unnaturally perfect.

Yet Kaoru cannot find it within himself to believe that that is all there is to Yuuichi. Call it gut instinct or whatever, but if Fuyumi and Kyouya respect their eldest brother, there must be something in him to deserve it.

"Practical instruction is always best, Kyouya-senpai. All fashion designers will tell you that. It's harder for me to learn if you teach me over the phone. Even when I am working on my own things, it motivates me to be directly around you because you're so focused and hardworking."

"I'm not sure I approve of you encroaching onto my space. It's frankly bizarre that you can work while surrounded by so much clutter or that you require so many things in the first place. Is that a mini atelier I see?"

"No. That's the apparatus I need to use to complete O-Ren-san's assignment," Kaoru argues. Ren had told him to make an article of clothing of his choice. He'd decided on the trenchcoat – an enduring classic – with a twist. The 'twist' requires extensive embroidery of small beads and sequins; the equipment he is using suspends and spreads out the fabric in mid-air at a comfortable height to enable a faster speed.

"Would such an apparatus typically be found in an atelier?"

Kaoru is not going to answer that. "Fuyumi-san says that she will get Hotta to put in a little bookshelf for me to store my things neatly."

He watches as Kyouya's eyes take on a flinty edge. It is an unforgivably low tactic to use to divert Kyouya. Kaoru'll be ringing Fuyumi tonight to warn her and to say sorry.

"Senpai," he sighs, trying to diffuse the tension, "I didn't bring all these things to annoy you. It's true that I like working here. The only reason I've been able to keep myself from feeling too overwhelmed is because of you."

It works; Kyouya deflates slightly. "It is possible to do them all if you manage your time well and juggle the projects according to their deadlines."

"I know," Kaoru smiles sincerely. "I know that because I see you doing it. You show me that it's possible."

They regard each other in silence for a long time, both equally lost in their racing thoughts.

At last, Kyouya takes a deep breath. "There's more pressure involved in becoming number one, but you also have to see pressure for what it is, Kaoru."

"What, senpai?" he asks, curiosity piqued. All of Kyouya's philosophy is worth listening to.

"A reflection of your own ambition."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**7. The Ambivalently Personal Conversation**  
><strong>Wednesday, 22 September 2010.<strong>

Akito grows ever more eager to catch him alone.

For the umpteenth time, Kaoru emerges from a hiding place to continue his journey to Kyouya's room.

There has been no drastic alteration in his stance towards Akito despite becoming a regular to the house. His initial impression of his friend's second eldest brother has not changed; since the dinner, however, there is a new dimension to that impression.

Kaoru has begun to wonder if Akito is all right with his life as he is currently leading it. Unlike Yuuichi and Kyouya, he doesn't seem to be at peace with constantly being in a state of competition. He's too nervous – an outward manifestation of insecurity. It must be wretched to be trapped between one with the birthright to inherit and another with the talent to inherit.

Akito had not been with them for the dinner on Monday. He'd been rostered for the late shifts in the hospital. His reaction towards Fuyumi and Yuuichi – whether he would have tattled on them to their father – would have told Kaoru a lot of what he wants to know. But really, to have had the privilege to witness three out of four Ootori siblings at the same dinner table (particularly without the presence of their father) is already more than the average outsider will ever get.

Upon reaching his usual spot, Kaoru settles down and starts on his school work. Kyouya is not home yet, as he has been detained after school by class 3-A's planning session for their upcoming class outing. As class president, Kyouya had been reviewing the various possible locations and preparing information factsheets to be presented to his classmates today.

So, of course there just has to be a lot of physics homework. Woe is Kaoru. Both Kyouya and Hikaru are excellent at the subject, and neither is present to help him at the moment.

Which reminds Kaoru: Hikaru will be bringing Usa-chan back with him today.

He and his twin still spend all of the school day and all night together, but Hikaru has taken to going to Mori's house after school to meet with Mori and Honey. Honey is studying high level mathematics as part of his degree and Hikaru is completely fascinated by it, so he joins them and pesters Honey with a great deal of questions. Then, he comes home and raves about how terrific their seniors are, prattling on and on about mechatronics and automotive engineering and the failings of the law to adequately protect copyrights that should exist in a fashion design.

Kaoru _loves _it.

He looks forward to that time everyday when they sit closely in their room, enveloped in a light and blessed feeling, and listen to reports from each other on everything and anything.

His faith in Hikaru has always been repaid. Hikaru has completely understood what it will take to keep the host club going, and subsequently has completely supported Kaoru's endeavours towards presidency. Without planning for it, they have begun doing their own things; but because the people that they are individually spending time with are people that they both love, there is no need for worry or reluctance or fear that they will be torn apart.

"What are you so pleased about?" Kyouya asks as he walks in, removing his blazer and setting down his bag.

"Hikaru," Kaoru answers as he returns to the present. "Senpai, I need help with this."

"Ah, waves. I would have enjoyed that topic had Tamaki not chosen to give practical demonstrations of transverse waves and longitudinal waves in class."

Kaoru laughs. He remembers the incident well. There isn't a single person in the school who would forget. Kyouya had ignored Tamaki for a whole week as a result of it.

In less than a minute, Kyouya has simplified the theory sufficiently for him to grasp the underlying concepts. He had not needed to refer to anything to refresh his knowledge and his explanation was quick, effective and concise.

Day by day, Kaoru is slowly coming to appreciate how inconceivably amazing Kyouya is. Approximately a year and a half ago, when the host club was in its infancy, a poll had been held amongst the girls of Ouran regarding the eligibility of the hosts. As expected, for the purposes of club, most girls reported primarily choosing the host who has the personality or appearance that they have a weakness for. The question of which host they would most want to marry, though – Kyouya had won that by a landslide. At that time, Kaoru had credited that result to any number of reasons – he and his twin were too barbed and self-centred, Honey looked too pre-pubescent, Tamaki was too idiotic and flirtatious, Mori was too silent and subservient – but none of which had to do with whatever positive quality that Kyouya may have possessed.

In hindsight, those girls had clearly seen something in Kyouya that he had not until now. Objectively speaking, Kyouya's image has always been the most flawless out of all of them, so even without knowing anything of the real Kyouya and how genuinely brilliant he is, he would still have been the sensible choice.

"Thanks, senpai," Kaoru says gratefully. "You know, it's a good thing Haruhi isn't in your class otherwise she wouldn't stand a chance at holding onto that scholarship."

"Flattering as that may be, it is not unavoidably true. Should she have been in my year, she may find herself better able to concentrate on her work without being sidetracked by two relentless miscreants," Kyouya jibes.

"Uwaah, Kyouya-senpai! Pretending to be humble just to say something mean!"

"It's not false humility," he says, face inscrutable.

Kaoru blanks out with surprise, and his next words are a little careless. "You can't possibly believe that. I've been with Haruhi for a year; I know her studying style. She's conscientious and very level-headed, but she'll never push herself as hard as you do because she doesn't crave success to that kind of degree." Instantly he wishes he can take it back, because he's skimming dangerously close to subjects that should not be alluded to. He'd gotten lazy, no longer mindful about the things that come out of his mouth; he doesn't want Kyouya to think he is getting too close for comfort since he doesn't want to be pushed away.

Even though every one of them knows it, they don't talk about that scalding fire that Kyouya feels in his belly, that insatiable thirst, that all-consuming goal. They don't talk about the ambition and its likely consequences. It's better to follow Kyouya's lead – if he deems it suitable to reveal a fraction of it to them, they accept whatever they hear and encourage him as best they can. All other concerns are deliberately left unvoiced.

_That's it!_ Kaoru suppresses a gasp – so this is what Honey and Mori had wanted him to figure out! Kyouya had been angry at Kaoru's actions! He had been so very _angry_ and of course he doesn't know why!

That time... the first question that Honey had asked – it'd seemed so superfluous, but now Kaoru can see that Honey needed that answer to verify suspicions already held by him.

Anger _never_ happens in isolation; it is reactionary, a 'secondhand' emotion.

It is necessarily preceded by _pain_.

Unless Kyouya knows why he felt pain, he cannot know why he felt anger.

Kaoru is absolutely sure that Honey, Mori and Tamaki know the reasons Kyouya had felt emotionally hurt. Since Kyouya views himself as the protector of their host club group, he doesn't think that any of the six of them – individually – are protecting him. He thinks that the protection he gains from them is an unwitting one, born out of the club atmosphere and loyalty to the team rather than any specific sentiment directed towards him.

In other words, Kyouya thinks that it is the _club_ that is his refuge. And considering that he runs the club, he thinks he is basically protecting himself as well.

It's so glaringly obvious now that by trying to protect Kyouya personally, overtly, Kaoru had ignorantly induced feelings of vulnerability in his friend, which were the feelings that underlay Kyouya's anger so that he could at least feel strong and in control, however momentarily.

Kaoru had been so brainless and rash.

How could he ever have thought that he was the only one waiting to be called back to club? Tamaki, Honey and Mori had been waiting too. They'd just been smarter, knowing that they had to be patient and let Kyouya dictate the pace.

That's what Honey had meant about giving protectors something or someone to protect. This is the way that they've always protected Kyouya, all six of them, whether consciously or subconsciously. Kaoru remembers an occasion when Kyouya brought a remote rather than his phone to school; what they did – instinctively turning away to preserve Kyouya's pride, automatically shielding their horrified reactions, trying desperately not to laugh – was not out of fear of reprisal from the Shadow King. It was their method of returning the favour, of keeping Kyouya's emotional wellbeing in mind, by excusing and exempting Kyouya from all human ineptitudes and defects that they know he will hate to be associated with.

"What are you thinking about?" Kyouya asks sharply.

Kaoru's never been able to fully conceal himself from that sixth sense.

"Nuh... Er, I can't believe that Kyouya-senpai thinks that there are people in the school who can viably beat the odds to surpass you."

The biggest similarity between lying to a dumb person and a clever person is this: there is a substantial likelihood of getting away with the lie. The biggest difference is why: the dumb person usually does not detect the untruth, while the clever person is inclined to bank on intelligence to uncover the truth sooner or later.

Kyouya doesn't believe him for an instant, but Kyouya is, fortunately for Kaoru, a clever person. "I am aware of my level of ability," he says levelly. "It is caution that I am exercising. Complacency has sounded many a death knell; pride comes before the fall."

Kaoru smiles sheepishly and nods with easy acceptance.

Kyouya frowns at him, but lets it pass.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**8. The Personal Conversation**  
><strong>Saturday, 2 October 2010.<strong>

"Yuuichi-san, Kiyomi-san, are you here for dinner again?" Kaoru chirps.

Kyouya's eldest brother and sister-in-law had also joined them last Saturday, the day after their Mexican session, when Kaoru had felt half dead just from _watching_ Kyouya organise the cosplay. Over the course of that dinner, Kiyomi had posed several enquiries about their club activities with unfeigned interest and had asked after Kyouya with heartfelt concern.

Yuuichi, too, had looked very kindly upon stories of Kyouya's extracurricular involvements. He has been nothing like Akito, from whom Kaoru constantly senses disapproval of the host club.

And then, as though Kaoru isn't already well-disposed towards them, he discovered that they have twins, a girl and a boy, who are already two years old.

They are astoundingly _lovely_; a fact that disorientates and troubles Kaoru more than anything. He is not the only one baffled. Judging from the way Kyouya is more on guard these days, the frequency of their visits is highly irregular. Something is boiling beneath the surface.

Kaoru is fearful but he wants to stay and see how it plays out. He hopes that curiosity will not be his undoing.

"Yes, Kaoru-kun. How have you been?" Yuuichi smiles at him. That is to say, Yuuichi's features remain largely impassive but Kaoru senses a smile.

They exchange pleasantries and move to one of the smaller sitting rooms. After confirming that everyone is doing well, Kaoru tells them that Kyouya is at the dentist's. Or more accurately, the dentist is at Kyouya's – they are somewhere in the informal medical wing of the house.

"Have you taken over the responsibility of preparing for club sessions, Kaoru-kun?" Kiyomi asks.

"Yesterday was the first session that we planned jointly, Kiyomi-san. It went without a hitch – Kyouya-senpai is a really great teacher," Kaoru replies.

Last Sunday had been the deadline for him to memorise all of the information on the database. Kyouya had actually created a test online which lasted for a duration of two and a half hours. It had included multiple choice and short answer questions and had been devastatingly difficult.

Kaoru has thankfully met Kyouya's sky high expectations, achieving a score of 96%. Now, he is channelling all his energy into building his network. Arranging transportation is turning out to be an uphill battle – he needs to be able to travel through road, air and sea, so he needs a contact for each. The annoying thing is that many of the companies are not just in competition with each other but also harbour serious rivalries. He'd had his eye on a company that specialises in helicopter transport, but they refuse to work for the same employer as the chartered plane company Kaoru had been thinking of hiring. Completely petty and ridiculous.

He has until October tenth to sort it out. In the meantime there is an Indian cosplay session on the eighth. Luckily for him, Ren knows people – specifically, wealthy Indian customers of Hitachiin Yuzuha who were more than happy to introduce him to their personal tailors. These tailors had consented to assist him for a reduced fee.

"We're so glad for you," Kiyomi congratulates him.

"Yes, Kaoru-kun. Thank you for accompanying our little brother while he's missing Tamaki-kun," Yuuichi chips in straight off his wife's statement; she hasn't even caught her next breath.

It must be the most benign opening salvo Kaoru has ever encountered; so tame that it cannot be pre-empted.

He cannot regulate his reactions in time; he knows that his body language proves their conjecture right.

He fights down the urge to stand furiously and march out. That would cede the entire battle to them. Bringing the core of his mind to a deathly standstill, he returns their smile cordially.

"You're very welcome. As friends, we all do our best to help each other, ne? Kyouya-senpai has been generously tutoring me in my homework as well."

Neither of them respond by laughing one of those condescending and fake laughs. Kaoru is infinitely relieved; he would have hated them if they had done so, which would be such a shame because he had liked them.

"Your composure is remarkable, Kaoru-kun. Do not misunderstand us. We've found you extremely likeable too," Kiyomi says lightly.

Now they're just messing with him. He doesn't want to do anything that may endanger everything Kyouya has accomplished thus far. Why do Kyouya's siblings always target him?! Does he look like such easy prey?

"Of course, we will not bother to deny that we had every intention of asking that question in precisely the way we asked it in order to get precisely the answer you have given us," Yuuichi admits. "Don't beat yourself up over it, Kaoru-kun. You're a good boy. Kyouya was the one who had let it slip that his attachment to Tamaki-kun has far exceeded the bare minimum necessary to meet our father's demands. Shall I tell you the most fascinating thing my little brother did in the whole of last year?"

"... What?" Kaoru asks obligingly.

He senses a smile from Yuuichi – the problem with always sensing rather than seeing Yuuichi's reactions is that he can usually only guess at the gist of the emotion. He can't tell, for example, if a smile is vindictive or triumphant. Too many nuances are lost.

"He became very concerned about the Slez Syndrome."

Of course. _Of course._ That's a dead giveaway if a person knows how to read between the lines.

_These Ootoris._

Unbelievable.

Kiyomi smiles at him like a mother. "Are you and your friends supporting Kyouya in his quest to be nominated as heir to the company?"

Kaoru feels ill. He thinks of Honey-senpai, of Usa-chan, and clings on to that feeling of peace. "I'm afraid, Kiyomi-san, that as an outsider I am not privy to your family's issues."

The both of them exchange an amused look.

"Since Kaoru-kun is Kyouya's friend, he should rightly be supporting Kyouya in his ventures, isn't that right, dear?" Yuuichi nods at his wife.

"Quite so, darling. Friendship is good for Kyouya. Will you please let him know that using his heart is not a weakness?" Kiyomi agrees with her husband.

If they had set out to leave Kaoru rattled, dumbstruck and petrified, they have utterly succeeded.

"Oh, Kaoru-kun," Kiyomi sighs. "Please stop looking so shocked. Whatever will happen, will happen. All right?"

"Yes. Now, pull yourself together. We're going down for dinner. It won't do to have Kyouya see you in such a state; he might become unduly worried, or worse, become infuriated at you." As Yuuichi finishes his sentence, he supports Kaoru to his feet.

These two... they appear to be strong adversaries; worthy contenders for the position Kyouya wants. They've insidiously roped Kaoru into this crime; how is he going to be able to say anything to Kyouya? How can he tell Kyouya that he's revealed to them that Tamaki is a huge weakness of his?

He wants to go home. He doesn't think he can make it through dinner.

They are standing at the door, waiting for him to follow. It's clear that they will not permit him to escape. Numbly, he gulps down some of the tea that has long gone cold in his cup, smooths down his clothes and trots out after them.

_Oh god, what in the world just happened?_

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**9. The Comparatively Personal Conversation**  
><strong>Tuesday, 5 October 2010.<strong>

He is sprawled out beside Kyouya, flipping through the reports for the 2011 S/S season as he waits for him to wake up.

The Low Blood Pressure Evil Lord is sleeping on the left side of the bed, as is his habit. He looks adorable when he's asleep – dead to the world and insensate to everything. Early mornings are definitely the time to assassinate Kyouya should one wish to do so.

It shouldn't be long now. Kaoru has been lounging on the bed (lush even by his standards) for about half an hour; it's almost seven.

On Kyouya's sidetable, there are only ever five things: his glasses, his watch, and three alarm clocks. The alarm clocks have a very high turnover rate.

Kaoru has noticed that Kyouya always wears this same black watch – plain, tasteful, and functional. He never wears any other, not even fancier ones for balls and formal dinners. It looks well-worn and well-loved though Kaoru estimates it must have cost only 90,000 yen or so.

DEET. DEET. DEET.

DEET. DEET. DEET.

"Morning, senpai!" he hoots.

Kyouya grumbles unintelligibly at him.

"The Indian costumes are done! I've brought them with me today. If you give the green light, I'll leave them in the club room later."

Stumbling groggily out of bed, Kyouya flings his wardrobe open in search of his uniform.

"I've put out a set for you already, senpai. Just go to the bathroom," Kaoru sniggers. Kyouya gives him a dull look before trudging off.

Kaoru sweeps his things into his bag, making ready for school. The general consensus from the reports is that his mother's collection is a hit – cohesively designed with dazzling vision and spectacular showmanship. It's immensely gratifying. To him, the real privilege of being a Hitachiin lies in being her son, not in any material luxury or influential name.

Kyouya changes and comes out looking as hellish as before.

"Coffee on the table," Kaoru directs.

When his senior regains half of his humanity, he moves to the sidetable to retrieve his watch.

"Ne, senpai, why do you only wear that watch?"

Kyouya is silent for so long that Kaoru had almost begun to think that he had fallen asleep while standing.

"I like it."

Kaoru raises his eyebrows sceptically.

Okay, he won't pursue the matter.

For now.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**10. The Superlatively Personal Conversation**  
><strong>Thursday, 7 October 2010.<strong>

He inhales deeply using his diaphragm, and holds his breath – one. two. three. four. five.

Exhales.

Inhales again; holds – one. two.

_Mastery over the breath is fundamental to more than just martial arts, Kao-chan. It is the beginning of mastery over the self._

– five.

Exhales.

_Through your nose, not your mouth. When a person becomes nervous, breaths tend to come short and quick; but it can also happen in reverse: if a person takes short and quick breaths, the person is likely to become nervous. Resist the urge to take deep breaths. Proper breathing is about even breaths, not deep breaths. Deep breathing actually causes an imbalance to the oxygen-carbon dioxide levels, which makes you feel worse._

Inhales; holds – one.

_Kao-chan, if you can even out your breath, your mind will also stabilise._

– four. five.

Exhales.

Inhales; holds.

_Keep your eyes closed. Let your thoughts flow without engaging them. Let yourself be present, here, now. _

Exhales.

_Do you feel better now, Kao-chan?_

There are three things Kaoru wants to say to Kyouya:

(a) "Senpai, when I think about club tomorrow I feel nauseated. Do you think we can continue with joint organisation for a while more?"

(b) "Senpai, I'm worried that your eldest brother and sister-in-law may be setting some trap for me, or you, or me and you."

(c) "Senpai, if you keep pursuing your dream, your heart and your family's hearts may get trampled on so badly that they go beyond repair. This type of blood price – can you afford to pay it?"

Giving voice to any of those things might turn out to be horribly reckless. Learning that lesson once is more than enough for Kaoru. Isn't this a similar situation to the 'host club posters' incident?

He should trust that if anything is not right, one of his three wise seniors will take action. Perhaps he should confide in any one of them that he feels a little targeted by Kyouya's elder siblings. Tamaki seems to think that Kyouya should move full steam ahead with his dreams, and Kaoru knows that he ranks far beneath Tamaki in Kyouya's estimation.

A spectator! Kaoru's wish is to be a spectator, not a participant! Why is that so hard?!

His hands tighten around Usa-chan's ears as he clutches the soft pink plushie to him. It smells like Honey and cake and its presence feels like an embrace.

"Stop," Kyouya commands. "Tell me what's wrong."

He jumps, startled. "Senpai?"

"Were you attempting to break your brain? Your knuckles have gone white," Kyouya explains. "If you have concerns, address them to me."

Kaoru's not going to get an invitation more blatant than that.

But – people don't always mean what they say! Should he say anything? Is he being paranoid?

Maybe there's already something on foot that he doesn't know about! Maybe that's why Tamaki seems to have reservations about him taking over! Is it because Tamaki knows that he'll never be as good as Kyouya, and would only end up crippling the club?

Hands as cool as marble wrap around the sides of his neck, forcing his head up to meet penetrating eyes. "What are you so frantic about?"

Kaoru clasps one of his hands over Kyouya's, the other hand still trying to strangle Usa-chan, and anchors himself by letting his senior's touch drain the feverish fear away.

He is over-thinking it. He must be. How often has Hikaru had to tell him to quit letting his thoughts go down delirious paths?

"Kaoru," Kyouya calls insistently. "Talk. Now."

"Why does Tono not want me to do this job?" Kaoru says without opening his eyes.

This close, he picks up on all of Kyouya's body language; he feels it in his fingers, in the places that they are in contact with each other. He chooses to lower his defences, reciprocating the openness that Kyouya is showing.

It seems Kyouya has anticipated this question. "Tamaki thinks very highly of you. He knows that you are our best candidate, but his desire to protect you is stronger than his desire to sustain the club."

_Protect me...?_

"He was upset that I chose you despite knowing that you have a high tendency of placing other people before yourself and getting very hurt in the process. When he found out that I'd approached you, we spent the entire day arguing about it; back and forth to no avail. He wanted me to either nominate Haruhi as your deputy – unworkable, since she is not in the country, or have Hikaru deputise. I'm sure you can see the problem already – the breakdown of club roles and responsibilities make that unfeasible. In our school, club presidents don't all perform the same duties; those who have a deputy carry out different tasks from those who don't. Clubs that have vice-presidents, predominantly the Tier 1 and 2 clubs, are often run by the deputies rather than the presidents. Hikaru doesn't have the finesse needed for day-to-day operations and management.

"So, Tamaki then suggested that we nominate Hikaru as president and have you take on the role of vice-president. I agree with his positive assessment of Hikaru's capabilities in leadership, but in that structure you would still have borne most of the responsibility of running the club, which defeats Tamaki's intent of giving you the support that you would need. It makes more sense to do away with the vice-presidency where the three of you are concerned; instead, Haruhi could be the secretary and Hikaru can serve as the treasurer. You will still have to know everything, but I can teach it all to you and leave you to it, then turn my full attention to training Hikaru and Haruhi. This is better, I think, than teaching two or three of you at once and trying to divide myself or my tasks with the risk that nobody learns an essential skill because you think someone else is learning it."

_Wow_.

It is quite sublime to know that both presidents put so much care into it; heartwarming, to know that they weighed up Kaoru's personality and strengths and weaknesses and thought of him individually.

"So that's why? Tono is still opposed to it?"

Kyouya sighs. "Yes. I prevailed over Tamaki in the end though I acknowledge and even endorse his observations of you. Towards the people that you love, your self-preservation instinct is abominably low. Out of sheer determination, you would put yourself in harm's way to save the club; ironically, the reason that Tamaki opposes your candidacy is the reason I thought it merited a gamble."

Kaoru continues to hold onto Kyouya's left hand; he leans into the touch and smiles. "Senpai, I haven't properly thanked you for the belief you've shown in me."

"You do realise that as a result of this gamble, you stand to lose the most in the event of failure?"

He rolls his eyes good-naturedly. "Nothing comes from nothing. In the event of success, I also stand to gain the most, don't I?"

"That is indeed true. Curious how Tamaki's brand of positivity is as grating as yours is fortifying to the nerves," Kyouya mutters.

A twinge of irritation seems to pass from Kyouya to Kaoru; a tiny spasm through their entwined fingers. It dawns on Kaoru that his senior really is annoyed by Tamaki for something else other than the argument they had.

Dare he ask?

He wonders if he should voluntarily remain oblivious about the goings-on of Kyouya's life. The closer they are to Saturday, the more anxious he feels. For the foreseeable future, it is best to assume that Yuuichi and Kiyomi will be present at the house at the end of the week. Again. In which case, obliviousness as a course of action will benefit both Kyouya and him, especially if he wants to continue visiting regularly.

At this juncture, it is a waiting game. He doesn't know nearly enough about Kyouya's family to be of any use. It's not a given that he will recognise when he is being played as a pawn; being deployed on Kyouya's side is fine by him but he can't go up against his friend. Whatever Kaoru thinks of the associated dangers of Kyouya pursuing his dreams, he wants all of them to experience the fulfilment that comes with success.

"Hmm," Kyouya remarks as he draws back to scrutinise him. "Left on your own without Hikaru, you have a tendency to drift off into contemplative states of mind. I did think that you were the more introspective twin."

A perfect opening for Kaoru to ask a question that has been plaguing him for at least a year. "Were you ever able to tell us apart?"

"Naturally. You would not have expected less from me."

"How long...?"

"Are you asking how long I have been able to tell you apart, or how long before I was able to tell you apart? The answer to the first depends on the answer to the second, and the answer to the second is two months and a half after our first introduction by Tamaki."

So his guess turned out to be right. Kyouya had figured it out before Haruhi and had simply chosen not to disclose that fact.

He gives a weak laugh. "Two and a half months, Kyouya-senpai? You seem like the type of person who could have managed it immediately."

"Are you fishing for compliments?" Kyouya questions in a teasing lilt.

Kaoru blinks at him, stunned. _Oh, he knows._

His senior chuckles darkly. "Yes, I know. You imitate Hikaru flawlessly."

_He really, really knows._

"Whenever the both of you appear indistinguishable to the world, it is because you become Hikaru for however long the act needs to last. You are far more accomplished at this than Hikaru has ever been, are you not? I must commend you; I was consistently thwarted during that first month by your stellar performance."

"Why didn't you say anything to Tono?" Kaoru remembers distinctly how irksome Tamaki's random guesses had been.

"Am I obliged to tell him everything? He was keen on getting it right himself. In fact, he was the one who accidentally clued me in to the fact that perhaps only one of you was acting, rather than both. As soon as he himself made that connection, he finally realised that the one acting is you. Before that, he used to think you were both naturally alike, and then he assumed that the both of you were acting. Since then he hasn't been able to condone your guessing game, because he doesn't want you to be lost in your brother's identity. "

That throws light on Tamaki's odd behaviour that day. Kaoru straightens up like a starched collar, his breaths coming short and quick.

So this is how it feels like to have other people apart from his twin know so many private things about him. It is as distinctly uncomfortable as he'd imagined; the familiarity is too unfamiliar a feeling.

Kyouya grimaces. "It likely contributed to his reluctance to put you in positions where sacrifices will be demanded from you. He's constantly anxious that none of us become so subsumed by our masks that we no longer know who we are. Depending on how you see it, it may be rather arrogant since he wears his own mask, or he may just be trying to be a good friend when he advocates being true to the self. I'm not sure what he thinks your mask does to you; I doubt he recognises that you enjoy it, that it flatters you when you play the game, since it is testament to your hard work."

Those words make Kaoru feel hedged in; he pushes the other boy away to escape suffocation. He's less ready than he'd thought he was mentally – he's still putting up a fight even though his heart is trilling weirdly. If he himself doesn't think he's sane when he gets this way, he can't imagine how others can be expected to understand him. He is enthralled in every sense of the word – charmed and imprisoned by his wishes.

Shakily, he gets to his feet and prepares to go home. The hour is late.

"Senpai, I – "

In a sudden movement, Kyouya has him backed up against the wall, trapped. Kaoru sucks in a sharp breath, fingers scrabbling for purchase on the wall behind him. Kyouya is too close now; Kaoru hates it, he puts his other hand on Kyouya's chest to stop him from closing the distance any more.

"Running away? Don't you know I dislike people who run away? But I indulge you, do you know why? It is because where other people run to break away, you run to see if I will follow. How contradictory you are. I know that you don't know why."

"Look at me," he orders, hooking a curled finger under Kaoru's chin to lift it up. "I will give you your answer: you do know what you want. You want to be known, but you want us to have earned it."

Kaoru is _shivering_.

A deep shudder wracks through him. He wants to hit Kyouya, but his disobedient hand clenches in Kyouya's shirt instead.

"Why else do you think you keep coming here?" Kyouya persists uncompromisingly. "At the same time that you decided to put your hand out to seize the Hitachiin empire, you dug up your longing to spend time with someone who is not your twin. Do you think, over the past weeks, that you were the only one being tested? You've been testing _me_, to see if I will be receptive to your company. Showing off your large range of interests in front of me, bringing all the things you like to my room so that I can see the real you. You've been trying to find out whether it is possible for you to be understood; that is why you've picked me, the person who you think has the highest chance of seeing through you."

Kaoru slides down to the ground, legs giving way. Kyouya's dark eyes follow him, his tall frame towering over him.

Those words have gouged out a part of him, leaving a messy wound.

He doesn't know how to stop Kyouya; has never learnt how to. He cannot hide from Kyouya; has never got the hang of it.

Kaoru feels the first stirrings of anger.

"It really is outstanding, the amount of control you gain over yourself when you go into acting mode. When you are as you are now, you behave like the rest of them – you laugh, you do silly things, you cry, you shout. But when you abandon yourself to take on another persona, you are able to heighten your awareness to a degree that even I admire. Such extraordinary skill; you really should be a con artist. Did it take much practice to refine? My guess is – a lifetime's worth? What do you think it means that for so long you have trained to consciously bury yourself? What do you think it says about you that you so enjoy being not you?"

Kyouya does not say that snidely, but for some reason it incenses Kaoru more than if he had.

He shoots to his feet for the second time that night, gritting his teeth to prevent himself from lashing out. At this point he doesn't want to see Kyouya ever again; if he has to stay any longer then he doesn't know how volatile the situation will become.

"And that is why you need Hikaru, and why you gave up Haruhi for him: because he is the only person you permit to truly know you."

Kaoru feels his insides go thoroughly frigid.

"Are you jealous, senpai?" he asks icily.

They perch on the edge of a looming avalanche. He can feel Kyouya go cold, too. He doesn't care, now – he wants to push Kyouya off, he _doesn't care_ if he himself topples over.

Before Kyouya manages to get his bearings, Kaoru steamrolls on to say, "If senpai happened to also be in love with Haruhi, wouldn't senpai similarly give her up? Oh, but I don't think that is why you are resigned about that relationship. Tell me, if you were to feel jealous – would it be because you want Haruhi, or because you want Tono?"

The room plunges into a vacuum, made airless by his audacious statements. That had been a prime example of how _not_ to talk to Kyouya. In all the time they've known each other, he's never seen Kyouya look so stricken.

"I mean, why does senpai allow me to keep coming here?" he wonders out loud, pitching his voice to sound faintly puzzled. "Although you and I are both used to working in silence, you never seem to mind that when I am here I ask an endless stream of questions. Is it that you've gotten used to being bothered while you're working?"

"I can withdraw your license to the house this instant," Kyouya almost-whispers in a deadly tone.

Kaoru whirls around to face him with a hollow smile. The more he empties his rage onto Kyouya, the more soulless he feels.

"Why is Kyouya-senpai kinder to me than he is to himself? According the prestige of club presidency to me, letting me claim due credit for my work – all of the things he didn't give himself? Why would senpai willingly deputise for a president who does nothing? Like you said, presidents who have vice-presidents do different tasks; they become the convenors of the club, managing the people who actually manage the club. In large clubs like the American Football Club, they have big executive councils that need presiding over; but in a tiny club like ours, what does the president have to do?"

He can see that Kyouya has a vast number of reasons – excuses – at the ready to counter what he has just been accused of.

Kaoru could have listed those reasons on his behalf; he already knows them, has heard them all before. The important thing is the fact that Kyouya has thought of quite so many reasons, and that he constantly carries them around like an indispensable shield.

Kyouya is very good at distracting people by drowning them in words.

Kaoru delivers the final blow: "I think it has nothing to do with letting Tono be in the spotlight so that Ootori-sama will be happy. Is there a parent on earth content with seeing their children play second fiddle all their lives? It is because senpai knows that this setup accurately reflects the balance of power, isn't it? You own the club but Tono owns your heart. And that is why _you_ need him, because he is the only person to know your truth!"

Their eyes are deadlocked over the brutality that they've just inflicted on each other.

Kyouya is so pale that he looks corpselike, and Kaoru knows he has gone too far.

"Get out."

He does. He tries to leave the scene of the massacre, but the only thing of himself that he manages to save is his shell of a body.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The day after that mutually violent conversation, Kaoru wakes up to find that _all_ of the contacts he has managed to build up thus far have been wiped out.

_Everything_, dismantled in the span of one night.

Had this act of annihilation come from anyone else, Kaoru would have called it spite. From Kyouya, Kaoru recognises the veiled message: he had denigrated Kyouya's power in the club, so Kyouya is flexing a bit of that power for Kaoru's viewing pleasure.

He comes dangerously close to a full-blown panic attack at the discovery. Breakfast is an impossibility. The realisation that he can't _not _go to school damn near kills him – it's a Friday, and Friday means club, and this particular Friday is the Indian cosplay. Duty calls.

It's so painful, having to hide everything from Hikaru. Kaoru doesn't want to imagine the consequences of telling his twin about what had happened with Kyouya. The two of them spend the day avoiding each other during school hours and miraculously they manage to be on their best behaviour during club, keeping all of their interactions to the bare minimum needed for any professional matters.

They pull it off by virtue of Kyouya's standoffishness and Kaoru's acting, and _fuck_, the irony.

Then, Kaoru flees home to quickly reorganise his contacts, spending the evening glued to the phone for hours.

Luckily, he hasn't discarded any of his research on these companies, or he would have no chance of meeting the deadline on Sunday. He doesn't need to ask Kyouya to know that his assignment is still ongoing and no extension will be given. It's good, too, that the second time round is proving much easier than the first; the bulk of the work – the research – is already done, and since he knows how to go about it, he can move at a faster pace.

Quickly, he regains half of what he'd lost.

Every so often, he finds he has to stop and do the breathing exercises Honey had taught him. He lies and says that he lost everything because his laptop crashed, and Hikaru takes to bringing food in and feeding him because he hasn't had time to go down to the dining room.

Friday passes in a blur.

Saturday passes in an even blurrier blur.

The only good thing about this is being able to avoid Yuuichi and Kiyomi.

And just like that, Sunday is upon him.

Kaoru cannot remember what it feels like to be rested. He is so tired that he cannot fall asleep. In the wee hours of this morning, he had attempted to nap for an hour or so, but all he could do was lie there while his body screamed at him about how much it wanted to sleep.

In the end, he'd abandoned that as futile and had risen to resume work.

The study looks like a warzone. Paper is everywhere, along with stacks of directories and almost-illegible scribble on whiteboards.

He is not thrilled about having to go to Kyouya's house to formally submit his list of contacts. However, he must do so before the day is out.

There are three more contacts he needs before he can consider the job as done: a serviced laundry, professional cleaners and the doctors on call.

_The doctors on call._

The most perfidious thought had entered his head last night – he could approach Yuuichi for the doctors. Yuuichi is guaranteed to say yes, but that favour will come at a price.

Kaoru is despicable for even having thought of it.

An agreement is reached with the laundry and the cleaners. He promptly starts compiling his final report; the doctors will just have to be left off the list. It's something that Kyouya probably expects, and disappointing though it is to be unable to exceed his expectations, Kaoru's not going to stab his friend in the back.

The cross-checking is frustrating because he's missing several files. He has the soft copy but the hard copies are at Kyouya's house; at the moment he has three screens displaying information that he needs but he's still switching between windows. The constant minimising is driving him up the wall.

"These will make your task less cumbersome," suggests a debonair voice.

Kaoru's hand flies to his heart, trying to stop it from jumping out of his chest. He hadn't heard anyone approach him at all.

Kyouya is holding out –

_Kyouya is wearing the scarf he made._

He stares at his senior, not moving to take the documents.

Behind them, two servants enter the room, each holding a tray of mouth-watering food.

"Leave them there," Kyouya instructs. "Thank you."

They bow and exit.

Kaoru is kind of frightened, like a rabbit in front of an oncoming train. He has never heard of Kyouya doing anything like this. This is Unknown Kyouya.

"Take the files."

Kaoru takes them.

"Will you be able to complete the task on time?"

"Yes." Short, safe answers.

There's something uncanny about this. Déjà vu.

"Have you eaten?"

"No." Kaoru had thought that he would throw up if he tried.

"Let's go."

He hadn't realised until now just how famished he is. But he eats cautiously, unable to throw his cares aside. While they eat, the silence gradually takes on a more companionable feel, like everything has gone back to normal. Neither of them talk.

When they're done, Kyouya takes out his books and stationery. Apparently he has shown up at Kaoru's house with his work in tow.

Kaoru moves quietly back to the computer and finishes the report in an hour. He doesn't print it out, however – not before he makes his final contact.

"Kyouya-senpai," Kaoru says haltingly, "I wonder if you can provide the doctors on call, please."

He knows that Kyouya has fully expected the question from the way he doesn't miss a beat. "Why does kouhai need my help? From the daring that kouhai has demonstrated, I had presumed that kouhai can do anything."

_Oh, so this is how it's going to be. _

_Great._

Kaoru's reaction to that could have been caused by anything, for all one knows: over-exhaustion, overstrung or possibly the final descent into complete madness, but –

He starts giggling at the ludicrousness of it all.

Kyouya snaps his head up at the sound.

Kaoru desperately tries to snuffle out his sniggering, but he can't stop! It morphs to full-fledged laughter, and soon tears are rolling down his cheeks as he howls and shrieks. Actually, it is really funny that Kyouya has a childish side too. He dabs at his eyes with a tissue, trying to clear his vision enough to see. Kyouya isn't laughing, although his lips are pressed together and his eyes are bright.

Kaoru gives himself time to calm down; only then does he say, "Senpai, I'm sorry."

That conversation had been so stupid, the both of them telling each other that someone else knows their truths – hadn't they also inadvertently revealed what they know of each other?

Logically, wouldn't they have to first know each other to hit where it hurts?

Crucially, doesn't it also mean that they know the other person's truths?

Kyouya responds with a non-committal hum. "Add the Ootori doctors to the list and print it out."

Kaoru does as he is told and offers up the report for Kyouya's inspection.

"Pass," Kyouya adjudges after a while. "These people are on probation over the next few sessions. We will see how they fare. Do not hesitate to swap any of them off the list if they do not perform to your standards."

"Yes, Kyouya-senpai," Kaoru accepts, deferring to his expertise.

Kyouya has already returned to his work.

From what he remembers of 'Apologising to Kyouya 101 – Invaluable Tips and Inexcusable Mistakes' by the members of Team KO, if Kyouya does not accept the apology, then the matter is not closed.

This means Kaoru needs to do something more.

He sets store by their advice; they know the details of Kyouya's life better than anyone else. Through their trial and error, they spare him from playing a guessing game.

"Senpai," he reaches for Kyouya's hand, grabbing it to stop him from writing. "I was at your house all the time because I like being around you."

Now he has all the attention he wants.

He holds Kyouya's gaze for as long as it takes for Kyouya to ascertain that he is being honest. A different kind of hush settles between them.

Kyouya gives the room a once-over and follows it up by giving him a pointed look: _obviously, the feeling is mutual_.

"Can I still go to your house?" Kaoru grins, delighted.

"You were the one forbidding yourself."

He had indeed chosen not to go, but he doesn't for a second believe that Kyouya would have wanted him there over the past two days.

"Are – are you still very angry...? What must I do to make it up to you?"

Kyouya sighs heavily. "It takes two people to have a fight, Kaoru. I have my apologies to make. I will accept yours if you accept mine."

"Eh?! Senpai, the things I said to you were far worse than anything you said to me. The stuff you said about me was all true anyway. In fact I probably asked for it – I had gone looking for it, didn't I?" Kaoru says ruefully.

"And I knew what you were looking for, yet I did not hold back or ease you into it gently. I had not wanted to; had believed that you needed the strong impact in order for comprehension to dawn."

"Then you're probably right about everything, senpai," Kaoru concludes dryly. "But I was rude. The attack was unwarranted."

There is a lull in their conversation.

"I sense we're going around in circles."

Kaoru laughs helplessly. "I'm sorry. I'm not thinking straight anymore."

Diplomatically, he refrains from bringing up the reason his mind feels frazzled.

Kyouya frowns at him critically. "You urgently need rest."

Very diplomatically, Kaoru refrains from bringing up the reason he hasn't been able to sleep.

A ghost of a smile crosses Kyouya's face, like he'd heard all of Kaoru's rants regardless. "Then, shall we stop for now?"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) Tachibana is the only one allowed into the ground floor of Kyouya's rooms. (I'm not sure that there's a living soul who is actually permitted on the second floor, the one with Kyouya's bed) Therefore, Hotta only holds the door open for Kaoru; he does not step into the room but instead stands just outside when Kyouya gives him his instructions. The same goes for Aijima – when Kaoru handed over the _croquis_, Aijima was toeing the line, just outside the doorframe. Kaoru would have had to stand up and go over to give him the _croquis_. As for how the sweets appear in the room, Hotta and the rest only prepared them – they then asked the servants with the 'official permit' to put it in the spot where they know Kaoru sits.

I'm very sorry for not making it clearer in the fic itself. Thank you for visualising it this way in your head :D

(b) A _toile_, also known as a muslin, is a version of a garment made by a fashion designer to test a pattern. It usually shows the designer's notations for cutting and executing the design. The designer and _premières mains_ will drape and shape the toile over a dress form to provide the basic pattern from which the garment will be sewn. The higher the fashion, the greater the skill needed.

(c) Shido-Ootori Fuyumi is Kyouya's older sister, as everyone knows. The manga does not specify the order of Kyouya's siblings, so I've decided on my own. Since both Yuuichi and Fuyumi are married, here is my order: Yuuichi – Fuyumi – Akito – Kyouya.

(d) Ootori Yuuichi is Kyouya's eldest brother. His name is canon, as mentioned in Chapter 77 of the manga. He has a wife and children, though it is not specified how many children he has. I have taken the liberty of naming his wife Ootori Kiyomi. 'Kiyomi' means 'pure beauty'. I've also given them two children – twins. In Asian cultures, it is considered very blessed to have twins who are of both sexes.

(e) The comment from Kyouya about pressure being a reflection of your own ambition is a quote from Ana Ivanovic, a tennis player.

(f) The things that Hikaru raves about are the things that Mori and Honey are studying in university. This is canon from Chapter 71. Mori is studying jurisprudence, and Honey's dream is to create cars and toys for Haninozuka's group, so he is in the Faculty of Science and Technology. I knew about the 'toys-and-cars' bit, but for some reason I forgot that he was in the Faculty of Science and Technology. I've mistakenly put him in the Faculty of Engineering in Chapter 1, since mechatronics (the science of engineering machines, predominantly robots) and automotive engineering both fall into that faculty. I have corrected it now, many apologies.

Jurisprudence can feasibly fall into the Faculty of Law or the Faculty of Arts, technically speaking. The manga does not specify the Faculty, but Kyouya mentions that it is good for Mori to do law so that the Morinozukas can support the Haninozukas in business. Hence, I have placed Mori in the Faculty of Law. Please note that Haruhi also wants to do law... Nudge nudge wink wink.

Also, just to add – fashion is in real life an industry that really suffers from the gaps in the regulation of copyrights and intellectual property. There are very few protections even though it is a multi-billion industry; in part, this is due to the fact that it is extremely difficult to isolate and pinpoint the exact part of a design that has been copied. It is very difficult and quite unreasonable to demand that, for example, a particular colour 'belongs' to you and you only. Mass-market clothing lines tend to steal (or "draw from") the ideas of these major fashion houses as soon as they see what's on the runway for the new season. In my experience, many people involved in fashion have a huge grievance about this – understandable, since they've put a lot of hard work into their designs.

As a side note, I LOVE what Honey wants to do.

(g) I didn't make up that information about the psychology of anger. Anger is, indeed, a secondhand emotion that occurs in response to some feeling of emotional hurt. The relevant information can be found on any good psychology website. Doesn't that put a whole new spin on why people feel anger? Note that Kaoru and Kyouya get very angry in the tenth conversation ;)

(h) The occasion in which Kyouya brought a remote rather than a phone to school is also 'canon', as in Hatori-sensei drew it. It is located in an omake, however, and it was drawn as a joke. Hatori-sensei and her colleagues were stressed and exhausted from the ever-nearer deadline, and began drawing a series of scenes in which Kyouya acted in embarrassing ways. In one of the scenes, Kyouya whips out a remote instead of a phone. The description of the way the other host club members reacted is also 'canon', in that they were drawn by Hatori-sensei as turning away and trying to withhold their laughter. For the purposes of my story, I have crystallised that scene into something that _did_ happen in their shared histories.

I adore the omake, please go and find it and read it if you have not! If you require the link to any of these things I constantly prattle about in my notes, please feel very free to message me.

(i) 90,000 yen is equivalent to a price slightly above US or Aus $1000. The point to take away from this is that the watch costs about $1000-$1200, yet it is the only one that Kyouya wears whether rain or shine.

(j) The American Football club is also a canon Ouran club. Kuze Takeshi is its captain. Yes, that Kuze that dislikes Kyouya.

(k) If you actually read all of my comments to get to here, I am really grateful and am completely smitten with you. Therefore, have a tidbit:

This story will have 26 chapters, as many as the anime.

Bonus points to anyone who noticed that the chapter titles closely resemble the anime ones. The future chapters will also reflect the same style... If you guess the titles, you can guess how the story will go.

I am dying to just give away all the chapter titles now, but that would ruin a lot of things. D:

Lastly, if anyone has anything they'd desperately like to see in a story, you may as well tell me and I'll see if I can squeeze it into this fic. After all, this fic covers every pairing and so I'm sure there's room for everyone. I only hope I can do it justice.

.

_Next Chapter:_

_4. Attack of the Lady Proposals!_


	7. Chapter 4A

**CHAPTER FOUR(A)**

**Attack of the Lady Proposals!**

.

Kaoru-chan has been lying in bed for hours, unable to sleep from the buzz left over from listening to onee-chan's swashbuckling stories. Despite having no need to steal, he's thinking of possibly becoming a jewel thief or art thief himself, just for the thrill of it.

He's going to be like her someday, a master of deception.

From tomorrow, he will begin training himself to exude a goodness he doesn't have, and smile a happiness he doesn't feel. He will use the method that she used to improve herself: observing other people, collecting snapshots of their personalities, and practise practise practise.

Like what onee-chan had said: why bother creating all-new personas when you can imitate what is already in front of you? Nothing that you can imagine will be as authentic as what already exists. If you act like other people, other people will assume that you are one of them.

That's exactly what she's doing right now. She's acting as a nanny, so the other servants feel comfortable with her because they assume that she is of similar social status as they are. That's how she'd found out the location of the safe – by listening to the staff's friendly gossip.

She's right, of course – how could he not have seen it before? It's actually embarrassing to have the finger immediately pointed at them whether or not they've actually caused any mischief.

_Real _masters cover their tracks.

He decides that he will learn how to hide his true intentions and catch the enemy unawares, relying only on himself and trusting no one.

Except Hikaru-chan.

This is the one aspect in which Kaoru-chan will always be unlike her – he relies on someone else and he trusts that person implicitly. He hopes fervently that this will not disqualify him from being as wonderfully cold-blooded as she is. It bothers him that he may fall short of her benchmark, but nothing will ever displace Hikaru-chan from his number one position.

His attention is diverted by a light squeeze to his hand; Hikaru-chan sniffles drowsily. "Kaoru, you can't sleep?"

Kaoru-chan shifts closer, whispering cozy reassurances to his treasured twin. They fall asleep together, oblivious to the inaudible footfalls in their room or the quiet clink of their coin bank being carried away by light fingers.

Many, many years later, when Kaoru-chan is fifteen and a half and has put enough distance between himself and this painful memory, he will experience a sudden epiphany about how much he respects onee-chan for leaving. Truth is, if onee-chan had been the type of person who would accept a higher pay and remain a servant for her whole life, he wouldn't have liked her that much anyway.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**30 October 2010.**  
><strong>Saturday.<strong>

"Waaaaaaaaaaiii!" Honey squeals as he makes an amazing splash for someone so small.

Hikaru howls gleefully and follows suit, curling himself into a cannonball and launching into the pool.

Kaoru, his twin and Mori are at Honey's house having a mini poolside party. Those three had planned everything and Hikaru had just dragged Kaoru along as soon as he'd woken up this morning, insisting that he'd informed Kaoru about this weeks and weeks ago.

Kaoru doesn't remember being told at all. Hikaru claims that he must have forgotten it in the ridiculous whirlwind of things he's had to do lately, but that's not possible since he hasn't been doing much for the past week.

_No, don't think about that._

Kaoru polishes off his slice of cake and licks the fork absently, reluctant to get up from the comfortable beach chair. He wants to enjoy himself now that he's here to spend the entire weekend with three of his favourite people. Thinking about unnecessary thoughts would just ruin the sleepover.

"Kao-chan, come and join us! Don't eat all the cake!" Honey beckons, arms waving about animatedly.

"Ka-o-ru!" Hikaru bellows before the rest of his sentence descends into indecipherable burbling, his head having been pushed underwater by Mori.

Hikaru had (stupidly) challenged their seniors to a two-on-two match: on a turn-by-turn basis, each team is allowed to make five moves or take five steps. The five moves are shared between both members of a team, and both must freeze in place when their five steps are up. To win, a team must get both members of the other team into the pool.

Needless to say, the twins had lost miserably for six games in a row.

In order to gain a moment of reprieve, Kaoru had quickly served himself some cake in full knowledge that Honey will never interrupt – or permit others to interrupt – a person in the sacred act of eating cake.

The seniors had turned to Hikaru instead, bullying him with cheerful abandon. Hikaru had looked rather thrilled to be their prey, so Kaoru had left them to it.

It occurs to him that what he's doing – sitting on the sidelines and watching the entertainment – is precisely what Kyouya always does.

His smile slips off his face.

The pool in Honey's house is fun but nothing beats the Ootori Entertainment Complex. For the past year, it has completely overshadowed their neglected personal pools. They usually go as guests of young master Kyouya and get lots of special treatment because of it.

Kaoru doesn't want to think of Kyouya now.

Five times over the past two weeks, he has been turned away from the Ootori house by the servant at the door. For the first week, Kyouya was still leaving memos for him about work that needs to be done, but by the second week not a single directive was issued. They haven't been meeting each other in school either, save for club – and both times Kyouya had left hurriedly with curt instructions to close club.

Kaoru doesn't understand why – it can't be because of that fight. They'd resolved it and had worked fine after that; in fact, he'd thought that they'd grown a lot closer. And it's not like Ootori-sama will be back until the end of the fortnight, yet Kyouya is already shutting him out.

To make everything worse, he doesn't even have the benefit of fashion work to keep his mind off things, since Ren has been tied up with the Japan Fashion Week.

A gnawing feeling bites away at his heart every day. He doesn't know how to say anything about it; he doesn't _want_ to say anything about it. Kyouya's personal phone has been switched off and Kaoru knows better than to call him on his professional or club phone for personal matters.

So, he keeps going to Kyouya's house. Every morning, without fail.

That's why he has a hunch that this sleepover is entirely spontaneous on their part, meant to keep him from moping after his fruitless visits.

A warm hand lands on his shoulder. "If you know that's why we're doing this, then don't let yourself dwell in your unhappiness."

Kaoru startles; he whips his head around and sees their most taciturn, wise, and _mind-reading_ senior standing behind him wearing a slightly reproachful expression.

"We worry."

Anxiously, he seeks out the location of the other two – they are still in the pool, shooting each other with the JetStream 5000 and the MachBunny IV – only then does the embarrassment set in and cause him to hang his head. He closes his eyes when he feels Mori's long fingers thread through his hair, easing the sting of his prior chastisement.

"Mori-senpai," he says, and Mori hears everything left unsaid.

His senior exhales heavily and settles beside him; no more words are exchanged. They look on as their loved ones continue to attack each other rowdily, and after a while, Kaoru finds that he has to smile at their silliness.

Mori cuts him a glance:_ much better._

Kaoru takes a fortifying breath, and confesses, "I feel awful, senpai."

"Hnn."

"I worry, too. I _hate_ not knowing what's going on." He's certain that he's not feuding with Kyouya. Apart from the lack of communication, Kyouya really hasn't displayed any unfriendliness or displeasure. He just seemed really rushed and busy, and though he looked impeccable as always in club, Kaoru could sense that he felt extremely hassled.

"Do you think he's deliberately ignoring you?" Mori asks.

Yes... and no. It's not so straightforward! Both answers are backed up by plausible explanations. Kyouya's never been socially careless, which suggests that he chose this course of action. On the other hand, it's not his style to thoroughly brush off those closest to him.

It is _very _bold, but Kaoru fancies that he knows Kyouya a little by now. "I think," he hazards a guess, "that he's trying to hold me at arm's length but I'm not sure that he intends to be quite so cold. It's because – did Mori-senpai notice how tense he was yesterday? I think he's swamped by work or something, and it amplifies the effect of his aloofness."

Ah, good. Mori's face says that he has come to the same conclusion. That lends credibility like few other things can.

Kyouya, being Kyouya, would have foreseen a certain degree of amplification. What does it mean, that he doesn't care, or that he cares less that Kaoru may feel alienated than some other concern? Also, this _conspicuous_ estrangement between them is inevitably short term. One or more of them is bound to confront Kyouya about it sooner or later, which would make it a useless long-term tactic.

This is what it all adds up to: _something big is going on now_. It is something that Kyouya wants to keep Kaoru away from, yet it is something that he knows will not be hidden forever. Kyouya likes subtlety, but he prizes efficiency over everything else – meaning that, at the moment, it is more important that nobody know of whatever it is, than it is to not arouse suspicions.

He's probably factored in Kaoru's curiosity and investigative ability. His estimation would be spot on, too – he knows too much of what Kaoru can and cannot do from the tasks that he's been setting, which unfortunately means...

About the time when Kaoru will have found out enough to make an educated guess, the news will be ready to be made known to the world.

It is consistent with Kyouya's modus operandi, and it makes Kaoru mad as hell.

He'd thought they were_ better_ than this.

In the end, Kyouya just likes playing his cards close to his chest. Kaoru doesn't want that part of Kyouya to change; he has merely gotten used to his privileged position at Kyouya's side, entitled to peek at those cards at will.

"Kyouya-senpai's eldest brother and sister-in-law talked to me," Kaoru states abruptly.

Mori's eyes widen a fraction. He looks troubled as he contemplates this new information.

"Nnn," he acknowledges finally, nodding his head.

This is a safe place for Kaoru to leave his burden. The similarity between Mori and Kyouya is their silence where the rest of the club is loud; when the mouth is shut, the eyes and ears function better. For a protector, this is invaluable – unless they know what they must defend against, they cannot do their job properly.

Mori is a pillar of strength for the people he loves, and Kaoru will accept the protection so freely offered.

They remain sitting as they watch Honey chase Hikaru around, resuming their game one-on-one. Formidable opponent though Honey remains, without Mori in the game they can no longer do any of that outrageous tossing each other around business. That's probably the reason Hikaru has narrowly scraped through several turns, but Honey is beginning to do his horrifying bunny hops and kicks.

There is a low, rumbly sound that Kaoru takes a while to recognise as Mori's laughter.

_Laughter?_

That's the kiss of death for his ill-fated Hikaru.

Hikaru and his idiotic banzai-banzai mindset is still trying to give as good as he's getting, leading him to make suicidal cracks at Honey.

Kaoru really admires his brother's never-say-die attitude.

Randomly, Mori says, "Do you know where Ootori Yoshio-sama has been?"

"Aah?" Kaoru replies, distracted. "Kyouya-senpai said – Hikaru! Dodge! No! Go left! _Left_! – Kyouya-senpai mentioned he was in Europe."

"... France?"

"Eeeh? I don't know. Kyouya-senpai didn't really – "

Sadly, he won't be able to keep living if his twin is dead, so he makes to rescue Hikaru from their impressive foe.

"Kaoru."

Kaoru freezes mid-run, realising how rude he's being to his senior. He turns around apologetically. "Senpai, I'm sorry."

Mori's face looks carved out of stone.

_Oh._ When Mori speaks on serious topics, he should listen equally seriously.

Chagrined, he walks back to the beach chair, stopping in front of Mori to face up to his mistake.

"Sen – " is all he manages to say before his world is upended.

"Hah HAH," Honey crows triumphantly. "Hika-chan, we've got your Kao-chan now!"

"Nooooo! Kaoru!" Hikaru wails in anguish. "Kaoruuu!"

Kaoru is flying through the air, flung by a pair of battle-toned arms. Before he is dunked into the water, he catches a glimpse of Mori smiling at him:

_Much, much better_.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Earlier today, Kaoru'd attempted to catch Kyouya with an entire arsenal of pretexts at his fingertips to explain his presence in the 3-A classroom. As it'd turned out, he hadn't needed to use them because Kyouya hadn't been there at recess or at lunch. There'd been books on his table so he must have come to school, though his bag had been missing. Leaving the vicinity of 3-A stealthily so as to avoid detection, Kaoru had gone over all the possible places Kyouya could have been at – the infirmary, the cafe, the staff room, the libraries – before he had been forced to admit defeat.

Then, as usual, he'd gone to the Ootori house; and, as usual, had been politely rebuffed.

He's plodding along to the Hitachiin offices in the wrong frame of mind. Although Ren is working at Hitachiin, she has (with Kaoru's mother's blessings) begun to establish her own independent label which shows in the JFW. As she has concluded everything that she'd needed to do, they are officially commencing a regime of after-school fashion lessons.

Kaoru feels disgusted with himself. How dare he not want to be here, when his teacher is the stupendous Saejima Ren? He has heard anecdotes of the lengths to which fashion students have been willing to go in order to become her disciples. It won't do for him to forget that the only reason she is teaching him is due to his mother, and not because of whatever talents that he may have. He's smart enough to capitalise on chances that come to him through sheer birth privilege.

"O-Ren-san," Kaoru greets deferentially, dipping into a bow. "How are you?"

"Ah, Kaoru-kun! I'm very well," she replies with a smile, inclining her head slightly. "And you?"

She's honestly friendly, too; as patient as any person who's pressed for time can reasonably be expected to be, and firm and decisive in her actions. Her husband is so hopelessly smitten with her that his praises border on the fine line of social acceptability, often just tipping into the disconcerting end of the behavioural spectrum. Kaoru knows this because her husband is his mother's cousin, and his mother had been the one to bring the happy couple together.

"What I want you to do this week," she says briskly as soon as the niceties are out of the way, "is to work with the archival unit. This is Yoshimura Chikako-san, our head archivist. She will show you the ropes."

With that, Ren turns on her heel and vanishes, leaving a very dazed Kaoru.

_The archive? And doesn't Chikako-san work in the France office?_

"This way, Kaoru-kun." Chikako heads down a corridor without checking to see if he's following.

_Ooookay._

As a matter of course, Kaoru has met all of these people before. When he and Hikaru were younger, they'd occasionally terrorised their chauffeur into driving them here, or they would prank call the offices out of boredom. Their notoriety has spread to every corner of every Hitachiin office around the globe, but they've still always been treated with a level of courtesy beyond the norm because of their status.

Kaoru understands what this is. It isn't payback. His mother doesn't hire that kind of low quality people. It's a compliment – since he's signed up for this, they aren't going to do the baby steps phase with him; instead, they are treating him as a _colleague_ now.

And he knows that he is able to correctly identify their changed attitudes towards him solely because of Kyouya. He feels a terrible pang at the stray thought.

"These are the tags that accompany every article of clothing. The garments are sorted by season and collection. We preserve them carefully in these vacuum bags; the tags go on the outside of the bags."

Kaoru is surprised to see that the room is packed to the brim with all of their past collections; even the latest season's collection is here! They have always been warehoused in France for easy access and reference. It doesn't make sense for the newest collection to be in Japan when Kaoru's mother is going to need these prototypes.

Chikako rifles through a stack of cards on the table and extracts one of them for Kaoru. "Your first job is to fill in the tags for the latest collection. I've given you an example of a completed tag. There are detailed descriptions of any and every material or fabric used to make the dress. Include the measurements of the dress and date all of them accordingly. I will have to confirm that the information on the tags is correct, and then you may attach them to the bags. The exact information should then be entered into our database. All of this must be done by dawn tomorrow, when we will ship this season's collection back to France."

He gasps, just barely preventing himself from squawking. Itemising _forty_ of these highly complex clothes in one night?!

"Here is your workstation, Kaoru-kun. I'm sure I don't need to elaborate on the proper procedures for handling these garments," she says, returning to her work.

He knows he can't keep feeling overwhelmed every time he's asked to do challenging work. Still, it's a struggle to curb the urge to run home to Hikaru and force him on this same life path. In Kaoru's mind, he has only ever imagined himself in a professional atelier with his twin right by his side. This decision that he's made alone is causing him to have the worst bouts of separation anxiety that he's ever experienced. He knows this stuff, but his self-esteem is not used to standing on its own without Hikaru. Everything is twice as difficult when he's half the person he used to be.

Kaoru's hands are shaking slightly when he reaches for a dress and lays it out to examine it. This outer layer – it is chiffon and not georgette, right? He touches it; if it's smoother it's chiffon, but his extremities feel rather cold despite the regulated temperature of the office. He wrings his hands to reintroduce heat, and a memory comes to him: cool fingers, a self-assured gaze, and a voice saying '_it is possible to do them all if you manage your time well'_.

The twinge of frustration he feels does not stop a smile from tugging at his lips. After the things he has had to do for Kyouya, he should not be afraid of tasks that seem insurmountable. Little by little, he will chip away at it – that is all he needs to do for the problems to resolve themselves.

Encouraged, he gets to work.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The next day, Chikako drops a bombshell on him:

"These are our past collections – if you look at their tags, you'll realise that they are different from the ones that you used yesterday. We are updating all the tags to these newer ones to increase the amount of detail recorded. Copy the old information onto the new tags, then find out the additional information that the new tags require. The documents over there should contain everything you need. Please also colour-code the collections."

So it is that Kaoru is sifting through the rich history of Hitachiin on his knees, a mimicry of the reverence he feels towards his mother's empire. He's seen all of these garments in glossy lookbooks. Every single one of them is imprinted indelibly in his mind, a consequence of him having spent much of his years poring over the books repeatedly. They have long been part of the landscape of his fantasies, though he hasn't seen or touched many of them for real.

This is his _dream_, yet –

Once more he finds himself not wanting to be here.

Hikaru had been strongly opposed when he'd found that Kaoru was going to the office again. Yesterday, Kaoru had stumbled home at 4 am and had collapsed into bed without further ceremony. He'd woken Hikaru but he hadn't been in any condition to provide coherent explanations; Hikaru had gone into protective big brother mode so rapidly that Kaoru had almost gotten whiplash.

They'd come dangerously close to having an actual fight. Worry had gotten the better of Hikaru and he'd spent an hour lecturing Kaoru for being irresponsible when all Kaoru had wanted was to fall asleep. He'd nearly snapped at his twin – exhaustion alone had held him back.

Hikaru is at Mori's house now; they've come to an impasse, neither willing to say anymore to the other to avoid escalation.

What is it about difference that causes people to fall out? Is this something that they are going to have to get used to?

When they were one entity, they never disagreed.

Kaoru feels so _lost_.

At school, he'd been utterly crestfallen at Kyouya's absence in 3-A. Tamaki hadn't been in the classroom either. Rather than hunt around for his seniors, he'd promptly taken out his laptop to resume his investigation. Kaoru's no slouch as a sleuth and he knows it. They cannot afford to waste any more time in cracking this mystery.

These are the facts he has amassed thus far:

Ootori zaibatsu shares have risen sharply in value from the Slez Syndrome medicine. The rights to the medicine are tightly controlled; its releases in Japan and the wider Asia region have been personally overseen by Yuuichi.

There's something wrong there. Yuuichi and Kiyomi must have been in over their heads with the project, yet they've been showing up every Saturday for dinner and a chat?

And – why is Akito prowling the corridors at home when he's heading the recent Australian-New Zealand release? He should be continents away for several months at least. Why would he fly back and forth tirelessly?

To cap it all off, Kaoru had discovered something that had made him want to kill himself for being indefensibly slow: Ootori-sama is indeed in Europe – in_ France, _and_ staying with Grantaine-sama_.

Henceforth, Kaoru solemnly vows to hang onto every word spoken by Honey or Mori.

Why,_ why_... how could he have been so dense?

Suou-sama is also in France. The presence of those three companies – it's obvious that they are preparing for the European release.

'_They'_.

Under the agreements made by those scheming adults, in return for the Grantaine family receiving the lion's share of the profits, the Ootori zaibatsu is to own full and inviolable rights over distribution. Ootori-sama can release the medicine in wherever and whenever he sees fit, so why is Grantaine-sama and Suou-sama still involved?

Does that tie in with the seniors' absence during free periods? Hadn't he noticed that Kyouya appeared to be upset with Tamaki? How does everything fit into the big picture?

Though murky and indistinct, the clues point to a Suou-Ootori alliance simmering in the background.

Just the thought makes Kaoru break out in a cold sweat. Such a situation has all the makings of an earth-shattering crisis.

Already he is too far off the pace.

His mind is miles away from the clothes and cards in his hands. He's thinking about how to pick up the loose strands so that they may be woven into a whole. Ootori-sama is returning on the 13th; in all probability, that's the deadline.

When Chikako tells him to wrap it up, he sprints out of the office without a backward glance.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The brief magic that he'd felt upon seeing the vast collections is gradually being corroded by the mind-numbing process of archival.

He is appalled to realise that he remembers nothing of whatever he's worked through.

Constant oscillation between guilt and anxiousness is wearing him down – he wants to keep researching and the hours spent in the office are a real hindrance, but then he feels shame at not appreciating this opportunity.

His mental state has taken a bit of a battering.

This is the fourth time today that he has been given a ten-minute break to 'rest his sore back and knees'; it's more probable that Chikako is showing some mercy to him.

"Hello?"

In a quiet corner of the office pantry, he is making a private phone call using the office phone, in order that his caller ID will not show up.

"Hello, Fuyumi-san? It's Kaoru."

She is silent for half a beat.

"Oh, Kaoru-kun! How are you?"

Skipping all the pleasantries, Kaoru asks, "Fuyumi-san, have you seen Kyouya-senpai lately?"

"I haven't, Kaoru-kun. Did you get into a fight with him? That's too sad – the both of you are wonderful together. Well, don't worry. My little brother won't ignore you forever."

Elementary Ootori ruse: if he's calling it means he cares about Kyouya, so she's playing on his feelings to divert him from asking, "Why haven't you been seeing him?"

"I have business that must be attended to. Even though it is bothersome, I can't damage the Shido or Ootori name, ne?"

If she had said anything along the lines of how Ootori-sama doesn't like her to show up so frequently, or if she had so much as attempted to deny that she likes annoying Kyouya, Kaoru would have jumped on it. But she knows that he's not going to be able to pry into her business without being dreadfully vulgar. "Do you know where Kyouya-senpai is? We haven't seen him around Ouran."

"He can't have missed school. That boy is so studious that if I don't tell him to rest, he wouldn't know when to stop. Ah, Kaoru-kun, I must go," she says, not once giving herself away by speeding up. "I've bought many sweets that you like. The next time we meet I'll give them to you! See you!"

She hangs up oh-so-casually.

Kaoru flops back into the plush beanbag, absorbing the new data he's gleaned from the call: all the Ootoris are in on it.

Perhaps it has something to do with Kyouya's college education? Kaoru has found out – through a school cleaner – that his senior has submitted an early action application to Yale. The cleaner is a friend, a convivial elderly man named Takumi, who had overheard teachers in the staff room discussing Kyouya's reference letters. Apparently, they had been caught in a quandary about how to best present such a novel idea as a host club as an extracurricular activity.

He really owes it all to Kyouya for compelling him to establish his own network. It really is the best thing in the universe, though it makes him feel like a double-crossing lowlife for using it against his senior.

"Hello? Is this the NTT? I'm worried about a call that I made five minutes ago on this number. I called the other person but I think she may not be in Japan; will I be charged the overseas rates? Heh heh, I'm using the office phone, you see, and I'm afraid that my boss will find out."

He's learnt that employees tend to protect other employees based on a camaraderie of unknown origin.

"_Oooh_," comes the comradely reply, "Please wait a moment while I check our database... I see. Your friend's line is registered with our company but it is enabled to roam internationally. You will be charged the normal local rates, and she will bear the extra cost."

So Fuyumi is indeed out of the country.

Kaoru makes some perfunctory exclamations of relief, and complains, "These forgetful friends; they never tell you anything important! She hung up so quickly too. I don't even know when she's coming back from wherever she is!"

The voice on the other end sighs in commiseration.

"_I know_. My friend is like that too. I use the company's system to track her down," she laughs. "Your friend must be enjoying herself too much to remember to tell you where she is. She's in the Kingdom of Monale – I'm so envious!"

Kaoru would have leapt up were it not for the beanbag swallowing him into its depths.

He mustn't go berserk over this news. Fuyumi could very well be in Monale for her personal pleasure – a wealthy, influential young lady with time on her hands in a European shopping mecca – it's a perfectly rational explanation.

Except for the fact that Kaoru was brought up to trust his gut feelings. His mother and grandmother practically built their lives on refined instinct – a fusion of knowledge and educated guesswork.

He doesn't have the resources to keep an eye on Fuyumi, much less the rest of Kyouya's family. Even if he does, few people are able to tail an Ootori and remain undetected.

Kaoru has never been so _desperate_ for a powerful personal team.

When they finally call it a day, he exits the building to see that Honey is waiting for him by the car. He understands immediately that he will be going to Honey's house for the night – his luggage is packed for him, his senior's face looks extremely concerned, and frankly he's only too glad to go.

When Honey rushes at him to give him a hug, he lets himself be held; the way he feels is beyond description. They have imposed on their seniors time and time again – each time, their seniors seem to find it in themselves to give more and more.

Honey's hands are small and his whispers tender with affection: Hika-chan is at Takashi's, same as yesterday, and Honey is here for Kao-chan, and Kao-chan should come home with Honey because Honey will always, always want Kao-chan.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

His fourth day, and Chikako is ready to fire him.

"Kaoru-kun, I don't think you should come in tomorrow," she says without warning.

Kaoru fumbles the bundle of tags he's holding, and they cascade to the ground like a shower of colourful fireworks. She's well within her right to do so, and she's well justified in her actions. The blood drains out of his face; he feels faint and sick to his stomach.

"Chikako-san!" he cries out in despair. "I'm really sorry! I – I'm – Please don't ask me to leave! I'll try harder!"

_Oh god, what will Mother say?_

"Don't – no – calm down, Kaoru-kun!" Chikako exclaims, taken aback by his ferocity. "I wasn't dismissing you."

He bends to pick up all of the tags hastily. It isn't like him to be so clumsy, but how will she know how he's supposed to be like? Apprentices are judged primarily by their performance and not their potential.

"Kaoru-kun, stop that. Go and sit down," she orders.

He hears her, but still he continues to gather the last of the tags to himself. She doesn't voice any further objections, choosing instead to settle back on her chair to wait while he rearranges them. At no point does she take her eyes off him though her scrutiny is not hostile.

When Kaoru is done, he stays on the floor with his head bowed, accepting his fault and his frailty.

Kyouya would've been so disappointed in him for not focusing on the tasks at hand.

"Chikako-san," he begins, "I am committed to this profession, this industry and this company. I have loved my mother's work all my life. I have no excuse for my behaviour."

She smiles at him. It is difficult for Kaoru to puzzle out Chikako's thoughts; true to her vocation, her mind is one big filing unit sorted to a classification only she knows.

The both of them keep very still by unspoken agreement. In a couple of meagre sentences, he has thrown so much of himself out there that he feels wrung dry.

"Do you know why O-Ren-san gave you this assignment?"

Kaoru has eliminated the impossible, and though the remainder sounds too good to be true, it must be the truth. "O-Ren-san wants me to use the history of Hitachiin as my foundation. That's why she sent for all the past and present collections to be brought to Japan, and why Head Archivist-san is here – because nobody is more qualified to answer questions about this company than Head Archivist-san. It wasn't my mother that caused all this to happen; Mother isn't in the habit of spoiling us professionally."

The archive in France would not have acceded to such a request unless a person of sufficient authority called the shots; the person who would go to such lengths for him could only be family – only Ren fits the criteria.

He lifts his head at Chikako's light laughter. He's right on every count.

"Fashion houses love a creative director who respects their heritage," Chikako reflects. "The clients expect it; the editors commend it. You know this, Kaoru-kun."

He nods.

"I first met you when you were six. Do you remember it?"

He does. Chikako had not felt the need to guess between a pair of twins out of some misguided notion of 'fun'. She may just have been of an apathetic disposition towards such things, like Haruhi, but she was their first encounter of this sub-species of humankind, and it had been an eye-opener to meet a person whose very nature does not instantaneously provoke mockery from the twins.

"I thought then – what precocious children these are! One of you openly reviewed the '99 collection in front of the _mains_. The critique harsh and the admiration transparent, as though it was the only topic worth any amount of discourse. You were so uninhibited, so forthright, so dauntless – it was mesmerising to watch," she recalls.

That's... really grand to hear.

Chikako makes a sound that's a cross between a hum and a laugh. "Was that your twin?"

Kaoru shrugs, unconcerned. He accepts kudos whether they are directed at Hikaru or at him – whatever belongs to one, belongs to both.

"The other child," she carries on, "chipped in every now and then to deliver a chorus of cheeky comments with his brother. I felt that the child would ordinarily have said a lot more, but he was so engrossed, so _intense_ – the child was swept away, he could no longer exist as us common mortals do; so profound was his desire for the fairy tale we were creating."

Surreptitiously, Kaoru flattens his palms against his thighs to stop them from trembling.

"Whichever one you were, Kaoru-kun, it is because I have those memories that I can see how detrimental it will be to you if you insist on coming here when your heart isn't in it. I believe what you said, but the effect the past few days have had on you has caused you to flick through your mother's work like lowly property rather than the exquisite works of art they are. It is no credit to either of the boys I knew," she says sadly.

Her words are as torture to him; to the fragment of him that is slipping away to listen from a distance.

He gets up off the floor. "You're right, of course, Chikako-san. I haven't been approaching this task with the correct outlook. Please advise me on what I should do, and I will do my best to carry it out."

Her mouth falls slightly open. "Kaoru-kun, I'm not sure that staying in this office is good for you. I've mentioned that you should not come in tomorrow. Go home and take your mind off things for a while. I'll see you on Saturday."

"Nothing will have changed by Saturday, Chikako-san," he says levelly. "I can only rectify my mistakes if you teach me how to."

Chikako gives him a speculative look; he endures it with ease.

"It is as simple as treating every garment separately, keeping in mind that each of them is intrinsically special. Some people require training to cultivate such a stance; others are gifted with it," she counsels. "This is the attitude that every artist should have. It should not be unfamiliar to you, Kaoru-kun."

She pauses, like she's about to say something that he may not like.

These are the changes heralded by his expanding world, the changes wrought in Kaoru: he _wants_ to hear it, even though he also thinks that he probably wouldn't like it.

And, where once he would have condemned her as a wishy-washy person due to her hesitation, now it seems like there are a great many dimensions to such a choice.

He has never been quite so sensitive to why people do the things they do; he has never _deigned_ to understand their logic.

When he and his twin were children, everyone – especially adults – had seemed impossibly imbecilic. Maybe, it is part and parcel of growing up to realise how puerile he was too, to see that his understanding was necessarily limited by age and inexperience, and to accept that one flaw does not invalidate a person's entire character.

Chikako does say it, as he'd expected her to. "But, this attitude takes a lot of energy to maintain, so people only apply it to what they value. For example, because your sketches are important to you, you view each of them as being unique and irreplaceable. It would offend you to come across a person who believes that all fashion is interchangeable; all designs mere duplicates of what has come before. This is the trap that you must avoid falling into."

Kaoru is slightly baffled. There had been nothing particularly unpalatable to him in her statements.

"How do I do that, Chikako-san?"

"Respect," she smiles. "Respect is the only antidote."

He stares at her, willing himself to not get riled up. There's the taste of blood in his mouth from where he'd bitten his tongue to hold back a razor-sharp retort.

"I respect my mother's work, and more to the point, I _respect my mother_," he grinds out, unable to fully keep the coldness out of his voice.

"Of that I have no doubt," she concurs, picking up several files and moving towards the door. "Saturday, Kaoru-kun. Please rest in the meantime."

Feeling mightily cheesed off, Kaoru calls for the car and speeds off to his father's office.

He is hours early for their scheduled meet-up for dinner, but he figures he can always use his father's computers to do his research while waiting.

The office is in a state of _pandemonium_.

Navigating through the messy cacophony of the lower floors, he reaches the CEO's office at the apex of the building and yells, "Daddy! What's going on?!"

His unassuming, good-natured dad appears to be in the eye of the hurricane – his hair sticking up in sporadic tufts, his tie off-centre – catching a temporary breather.

"My Kaoru," he says, surprised and doting, and still finding it within himself to give a cute smile that's strongly reminiscent of Hikaru.

"What happened?" Kaoru demands as he gingerly makes his way across the cluttered expanse of the gigantic room to his father.

One of the personal assistants hurries to explain, "We have a mole in the company! That beggar boy – I knew he couldn't be trusted, the scoundrel – he infiltrated all our systems and stole all of the blueprints for our software!"

Kaoru watches in fascination as the personal assistant's face goes purple, his nostrils flared in righteous indignation.

"Have you caught him?" he asks.

"All of his details in our employee database are false!" shouts the assistant, disproportionately agitated. "He's locked us out of our Intranet! He changed all the passwords! That boy was always so scruffy and sloppy, obviously a good-for-nothing! Call HR and find me the recruitment manager who hired him!"

Kaoru snorts in disdain. How is his father going to relax with someone yapping like a rabid animal?

"Er, Hojo-kun," interrupts Kaoru's father. "I was the one."

Hojo looks like he's about to burst.

He vomits out numerous apologies in a tongue-tied jumble to cover up his gaffe and backs out of the room in a flash.

Kaoru erupts with laughter as soon as he does. "Dad, did you really hire that person or were you just trying to get rid of Hojo-san?"

His father gets a shifty look on his face.

"Both," he admits.

A fresh wave of laughter crashes over Kaoru.

"You have the worst judgment in people, Daddy," he ribs, leaning over to view the information on the multiple computer monitors. "What was the mole after? What steps are you taking to solve the problem?"

"The specs of all past, present and upcoming software have been taken. Many internal documents have also been copied into an external, untraceable source. We've gotten a start on removing the viruses and security walls that the mole introduced into our system. It's doesn't look good – we may have to replace it with a brand new program. A group of people has been sent out to catch the culprit. We're trying to keep it under wraps so that the public doesn't find out that we've lost classified information; it will be troublesome if our competitors discover that this information might be on the market."

Kaoru analyses the data on the screens and lets out a low whistle. "He's a pro."

His father laughs ruefully. "That's what I thought."

"We may be able to track him down by putting in a high bid for the information that he has," Kaoru muses.

They could pose as a rival company who's somehow gotten wind of the leak – it's clichéd but entirely believable.

"... Dad?" he asks when he doesn't receive a reply.

His father's gaze is as clear as glass. "Hmm. Hojo-kun insisted that it should be a covert operation. Actually, I don't believe that we need to worry."

"Because there isn't a need to worry!" Hojo crashes back into the room, exultant. "We've caught him, Hitachiin-sama!"

A flesh-coloured bag of bones is dragged in and deposited in front of Kaoru's father.

This person has the most unkempt mop of hair Kaoru has ever had the misfortune to see, trumping even Haruhi's peasant look. The face is obscured by shadows and dark, uncombed strands; its figure is so lanky and its limbs so spindly – might this person be malnourished? There had, after all, been a notable lack of resistance for a person who's being coerced to face the music.

"Hitachiin-sama, we should press charges against him for his criminal behaviour! Stealing and embezzling funds!" Hojo exhorts.

"The funds are untouched," Kaoru points out.

"He was going to sell the information for money! Look at him! He obviously needs the money! Moneygrubber!"

This Hojo... If Hikaru were here, he'd take him apart, piece by piece.

Kaoru is feeling an unpleasant amount of second-hand embarrassment. Hojo's conjectures are wildly off the mark – apart from Haruhi, Kaoru has never met a person with _less_ desire for money. His abominable appearance is not a result of poverty but of choice, or of conscious lack of care. The damage that this person has wreaked on one of the country's pre-eminent software companies stand as a tribute to his skill. If money and profits were his objectives, he would have targeted the banks.

This was meant as a bravura performance.

The person clearly has a _complex_. He's young (Kaoru's guess is twenty-four), unquestionably a computer nerd, and Kaoru senses a kindred spirit who's bored out of his mind. It must have been terribly galling to be the underling of these tedious uncles and aunties in their cushy middle-class jobs, especially if he has that kind of nerve and élan.

Though, his looks are so stereotypical that it bowls Kaoru over. If he starts laughing, he might never stop.

"Hojo-kun, let's not jump to conclusions," Kaoru's father says soothingly.

In an instant, he understands that his dad knew all along– he wouldn't have risked actual harm coming to the company, but he would've wanted to source for talent, would've been prepared to promote them. However, because of this person's reckless actions, working in this company is no longer a possibility for him. He'd be lucky to get off without being sued.

What a terrible pity. Everyone would benefit from having persons like that around them; in fact, Kaoru himself –

_Kaoru currently has dire need of such people._

His breath catches in his throat; he hardly dares to let himself hope.

"I will decide on a suitable punishment. All of you, please leave the room."

"Hitachiin-sama – "

"At the next Board meeting, I will answer for whichever way I choose to deal with this situation," Kaoru's father reassures.

Both Hitachiins wait patiently for the subordinates to file out. Hojo is the last one to abandon his staunch objections, leaving rather sulkily.

"Daddy, I wonder if you will let me handle him," Kaoru requests.

His father turns to him, astonished, as a scoffing sound emanates from the person huddled on the floor.

_Please_, Kaoru begs with his eyes. He hasn't resorted to this trick for years; he's a tad rusty. _Please please._

He waits for his father's almost imperceptible nod before he swings himself off the desk and plants himself in the spot directly in that person's line of sight.

"Hello."

That person is deliberately unresponsive.

"So, here's the deal: use your abilities to find out something for me, and you walk free."

Things that sound simple very rarely are. The more intelligent a person, the more keenly they know this. Yet it is precisely why they are unable to resist reacting to it, because intelligence carries an arrogance all of its own.

As predicted, the person raises his head to convey the condescension that he no doubt feels for Kaoru.

_Oh._

_Ohhh, _definitely _a complex._

_Good grief. Is that Hojo wrong about everything?_

"You see," Kaoru says, trying not to cackle like Renge, "The penalty for defrauding our company will most likely be _imprisonment_. Jail time would squander your talents even faster than the banal life you've had here, don't you think?"

Kaoru's not ridiculous enough to circle his quarry. He's watching the face closely – that is where the battle will be won and lost.

"You have something that you want to prove. You've proven yourself here, but is that sufficient to feed your ego? You'll just get hungry again," he prophesises. "Let's not beat around the bush, then. I need you to track a person down – I want to know where she's been in the past two weeks, who is accompanying her, who she's been meeting with in those places, and anywhere that she may intend to go next. Think you're up to it?"

A disgusted huff.

"I see," rasps a voice croaky with disuse. "Since I'm already a criminal, might as well get me to do your dirty work before calling the cops on me anyway?"

"No. I said, you walk free," Kaoru promises with absolute candour. It would be meaningless – not to mention tiring – to keep a person who doesn't wish to stay. What he wants is for the person to choose to come back.

Sunken, dark-rimmed eyes stare at him unwaveringly, assessing him unreservedly.

"Fine. Get me a computer."

Kaoru nearly hops around in his joy.

They move to his father's workstation; the technology welcomes the computer whiz like a long-awaited homecoming.

"The person?"

"Shido-Ootori Fuyumi," Kaoru supplies.

Raised eyebrows all around.

There is a rush of adrenaline from the person beside him – yes, he'd thought that the Ootori name might present enough of a challenge to tempt a maestro.

For an indeterminate period of time, only the clacking of the keyboard is audible.

This is an excellent trial run for the both of them. First, their compatibility must be tested. If they work well together…

"Shido Fuyumi is in Monale."

_Not bad a start._

"She's been travelling a lot over the past two weeks; England, Spain, Denmark, Monale. She's alone except for personal attendants and guards. Ah! Yeah, these countries are all constitutional monarchies! She's been meeting with the royal families and various dignitaries. Doesn't look like she'll be continuing in the same vein, though. She's booked for a flight to France tonight."

The rest of the club would say that it is entirely normal that the twins idolise hackers.

To that, Kaoru can only reply: _with good reason_.

He claps excitedly to show his appreciation. "Amazing!"

"Tch. I could do this in kindergarten."

So the person claims, but Kaoru can see a little smile linger at the corner of the mouth.

He's dying to ask about Kyouya, to prolong the investigation, but that would be missing the forest for the trees.

"Thank you very much," he sing-songs. "We'll have to arrange for you to go overseas for a while to let the matter blow over. After the Board decides that it's useless to pursue you, you can do whatever you want. I'll buy the air ticket and contribute to a small travel fund for your miscellaneous expenses. We won't keep tabs on you."

He receives a disbelieving look for all his trouble. Undeterred, he carries out his promises at once.

"Right, that's done then," he says cheerfully, snapping his phone shut. "Here are the details of your flight and everything else that you'll need to get away. See you!"

Warily, the person reaches for the sheaf of papers he's proffering. When nothing untoward happens, the person slinks out of the doors and disappears into the gloom of nightfall.

"Ne, dad," Kaoru remarks, breaking the silence, "She's quite brilliant, eh?"

"Mhmm."

He looks askance at his father. "I have a cross-dressing friend. What's your excuse?"

"Child, your mother puts girls in boys' clothing and boys in girls' clothing so often, of course I can tell," he replies blithely.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Kaoru has free time after school.

Naturally, this means that he goes to Kyouya's house.

Today is Friday, but Kaoru isn't going to open club. If Kyouya needs the extra time to get things done, he is happy to provide it.

Contrary to what the others think, his visits are not without purpose. He never dawdles there, just stays long enough to ascertain the peripheral elements that most people miss. The household staff do not treat him as a trespasser – he can stroll around the grounds if he wants to. It is a huge privilege born out of the recurring meetings he'd had with his senior and the tacit approval of Team Kyouya.

Kaoru doesn't know to what extent Kyouya has been briefed about his presence. For some reason, he can't shake off the belief that Kyouya may actually be largely unaware of it. The windows in Kyouya's room do not face the main entrance, and Kaoru has been very cautious in keeping out of their purview. The staff are unreadable, though they are steering clear of anything that may be a nuisance.

Sometimes, when he beams at the staff, he thinks that they are rather fond of him.

Even the most circumspect of servants must exercise their powers of discernment when reporting to their employers. Could they be shielding him? If they are, they must believe this to be in their young master's best interests. If they aren't, who is hiding him from Kyouya?

In the Ootori compound, if one knows where to look, one can discover all sorts of little indicators that reveal things about its inhabitants. At the private car porch slightly off to the right is where the masters of the house alight upon arrival. There is a camouflaged panel built into the wall – the chauffeur flips the lid open and flicks a button to alert the rest of the staff about who has just returned. Likewise, at the garage there is another panel to indicate who is calling for his or her car.

This is how Kaoru always knows whether Kyouya is home.

"That...! _Unbelievable_! I can't even...!" he splutters at his twin as soon as he crosses the threshold into their room.

Hikaru twitches half-heartedly from where he's lazing on their bed. "Kaoru, you're noisy."

"Arrrgh!"

He strides over to his side drawer, takes out his hoard of sketchbooks and leaves for the atelier.

Plan! He will plan! He's going to draft a hell of a project that will work all of them to the bone!

"What's up with you?" Hikaru asks dubiously, apparently concerned enough to rouse himself to follow Kaoru.

"All of you! Bumming around when there's no club! Hanging out with your friends like you're so free!" Kaoru snaps.

"But... we are free?" Hikaru says.

Kaoru aims a deadly glare in his direction.

"Waaoow, Kaoru, you're scary."

He sets out the outline of the activities he has in mind – he has some authority to designate tasks these days, right? He's going to assign Kyouya the job of opening club, and Tamaki the job of closing club. That way, he wouldn't _ever _assume that they are _inundated with work _and _unable to attend_.

Hikaru wraps his arms around Kaoru's waist and peers over his shoulder. "Hah?! What's _this_?!"

"A plan!"

In one swift movement, Hikaru wrestles the pen out of his grip and compels him to turn around, trapping him against the table. "No, really, what?"

"If all of you are so carefree, then we should have gone to club! So I'm organising the next few sessions so that everyone will have plenty to do!"

Hikaru places his hand on Kaoru's forehead. "Are you sick?"

Kaoru bats at him irritably and tries to twist himself out of his confines.

"What the... Did Kyouya-senpai scold you or something? Hey! That hurts!"

Kaoru snorts. "No, he was having too much fun. That's why I say, I shouldn't have cancelled club!"

Hikaru's vise grip on him slackens with surprise, and Kaoru darts away.

"_Fun?_ Can you tell me the whole story so I can stop asking!" Hikaru presses, exasperated.

Kaoru snatches his book and pen back from his brother and sits down on the opposite edge of the table to resume his work. "There's nothing to tell. Kyouya-senpai was at home and Tono was with him. I heard them laughing and enjoying themselves from the open window, but I guess Kyouya-senpai was too _busy_ to entertain more guests since they still won't let me in."

Hikaru sighs deeply. "Ne, Kaoru, you... "

"What?" he says defensively.

"Just don't go there anymore!" Hikaru implores. "Those two – actually, I don't know how Tono's family situation is like now. It seems like it's okay, but who knows? Everyone cares about them but it's not a good idea to get involved in other people's family matters."

"Who's talking about Tono?! I was – "

"I know, I know. You're talking about Kyouya-senpai. But isn't that situation even worse? Tono's family caused a gigantic explosion but we managed to survive it. Who's to say we'll survive another time? At least with those Suous, Tono had that wish and he did a lot of crazy things to bring his family together. The Ootoris are _different_. Even though Tono is really dumb, he's not black-hearted like them! Kyouya-senpai's family is like a chain of landmines that's buried where nobody knows. What if you accidentally step on one of them? Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai don't want you to keep going there, and I think they're right, Kaoru."

He gapes at his twin, stunned.

"If you don't stop looking at me like that, I'm going to start feeling insulted," Hikaru says flatly.

"No, idiot!" Kaoru yelps, delivering a smack to said idiot's head. "I, of all people, know how clever you are! It's just – you mean the senpais – they disagree – as in – ugh! Don't the rest of you think that this is why we _must_ stay with Kyouya-senpai?! He is a strong person, but that's no reason to refuse additional support!"

Hikaru blinks at him owlishly. "Let Tono support him! It's _Kyouya-senpai_. You're out of your depth, Kaoru."

He draws in a rattling, unsteady breath. Everything that his twin is saying makes a lot of sense. He's never seen it from this angle before – why hadn't he?

"Am... Am I a busybody?"

In the next moment he finds himself crushed tightly against Hikaru.

"_God_, Kaoru," his twin murmurs into his ear. "You're so _stupid_."

It's only been approximately four hours since he was last hugged by these familiar arms, but he misses it all the time; craves it with every waking thought – his first and best protection, his indestructible fortress, his safest sanctuary.

"Hikaru..."

Hikaru pulls back and drops a soft kiss on his lips.

"Stop working, please? We'll spend the day together – just like old times."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

This is his last day with Chikako before Ren takes him back under her wing.

Rejuvenated by Hikaru's love, Kaoru tackles his tasks without delay. Concentration and respect come to him easily when he can _feel_ Hikaru. Adult life seems to introduce a lot of sewage into their special twin channel, clogging and polluting it unless it is constantly monitored and repaired. They've cleared the blockage – the warm presence surrounds him, giving him energy and strength.

"You've done well," Chikako approves.

Kaoru inclines his head.

"Work hard, Kaoru-kun," she advises. "You'll go far."

He bows to her in acknowledgement of her guidance over the course of the week, and departs for Haruhi's apartment.

Chikako is returning to France with the batches of clothing in a week's time. They're not on the best of terms with each other. Her understanding of him seems to surpass the understanding he has of her, and that leaves him floundering when they interact.

It's like with Haruhi, on a far more uncomfortable scale. He adores Haruhi still, presumably he always will, but for the most part, it's not easy for him to correctly peg her psyche – the exact route that she takes to reach her destinations confounds him more often than not. Haruhi has goals but she's not fanatical; she's been wronged but she does not resent.

As much as he can, he tries to excise her from his daily consciousness. They need to live out this year, and her absence is a bottomless chasm that can't be filled. It's not fair to her; nevertheless he does it because she is indisputably the most well-adjusted member of their gang. The irony does not escape him – she is also their newest and poorest.

Each of them, in their own way, needs her.

She is the personification of _contentment _and _equilibrium_. She controls what she has, and accepts what she can't control. And maybe that's why they all cannot help but gravitate towards her – because,

In the cruellest joke of the universe, she has what they cannot have, is what they cannot be.

"Ranka-papa!" he chirps winsomely when the door opens.

Kaoru is certain that Ranka's liking of him has tripled since his appointment as Parent Liaison Officer.

"Kaoru-kun!" Ranka trills, ushering him in with delight. "How are you? How is everyone? How is Kyouya-kun?"

On his own accord, he visits Haruhi's father periodically so that he wouldn't have to potter about in the empty flat in desolation. That first phone call, Ranka had sounded so downtrodden that Kaoru had been overcome with pity. It's no hardship for Kaoru; a car makes everything convenient – even as he attempts to forget his best friend he nonetheless watches over the things she most cares about.

"Great! Everyone is doing great! How are you, Ranka-papa? Have you been eating three meals a day? Been keeping too many late nights? You know Haruhi will get angry with you if you don't take care of yourself!"

Ranka flushes, all buttered up by his concern.

"Don't worry about me, don't worry! My Haruhi just sent me an email and some photos; come and see, Kaoru-kun!"

His arm is seized by this overenthusiastic father, and he's hauled to where the laptop is.

Haruhi smiles out of the screen at him.

Her hairstyle has changed! There are _highlights_ in her hair! It looks way more feminine now. Who in the world could have brought her to a salon and coaxed her into it?

Suddenly feeling weak-kneed, he slides down into a crouch with as much grace as he can muster. How can he fight an enemy he doesn't know? He'd kept his worries dormant, unwilling to let himself speculate about what they'd do if Haruhi finds new friends and decides to stay in America.

Their faith that she will be restored to them has been sustaining them.

Kaoru should have shelved his pain and kept an eye on things. Hikaru's been in charge of their joint email since he's been too busy or too depressed to do much else – and anyway, Haruhi is constantly reluctant to send photographs to them. They've had to go by the written word to estimate how she's doing; in English, no less. Haruhi insists on sending her emails in a language that has cultural and colloquial nuances she has yet to grasp, making her sound formal and stilted at times. He doesn't know what sort of ideas she's got in her head about how they're going to use her photos. Her opinions of them can be so offensive sometimes!

"My Haruhi!" Ranka gushes. "Isn't she _perfect_?"

_Yes, she is_.

It occurs to Kaoru that all defeat is dishonourable.

With his mind he summons memories of her sitting beside him in class, of her confusion and her elation, her practised cooking and her bargain clothes. With his eyes he traces her slender silhouette, her self-possessed stance, her unaffected expressions.

He feels ashamed for looking at her although his thoughts are by no means filthy.

Actually, even before everything, Kaoru had _known_ that it would never have worked out between them. It had nothing to do with other competitors vying for her attention, one of whom being the person dearest to him. Kyouya had only been partially right in his guess about Kaoru's motivations for giving her up.

The complete truth is that he'd had a self-revelation – a realisation that he _couldn't live like that_. Haruhi's obliviousness and bluntness make her invulnerable in a way that he is not. He'd tested her on their date to the amusement park; worn his feelings on his sleeve and tried to see if she would pick up on it. She caught most of the auxiliary signals but not the most vital one: the fact that he and Hikaru liked her romantically. What it tells him is: had they become a couple, their relationship would have been fundamentally imbalanced – she would always have the power to leave while he would never have been able to, and eventually the emotional turmoil would have driven him mad.

Her independence – so admirable a trait – clashes with his inclination to stick like superglue to the ones he loves.

If Hikaru is 10% meaner than him, then he supposes he's 10% more clingy than Hikaru. He'd noticed this unappealing facet of himself when he was three, and had subsequently learnt how to tuck it away where it could not interfere. It had come to the fore when he'd so genuinely fancied Haruhi – he thinks it must be fancy and not love, for if it had been love, wouldn't he have surrendered himself regardless?

"Ne, ne, Kaoru-kun!" Ranka chatters. "I know that all of you boys have very stressful lives! If you want, I can prepare some home-cooked food and we can have dinner together! Of course my cooking is not as good as my Haruhi's – oh! Or we can ask Misuzu-chi to make the food! That'll be nice! I'm sure Kyouya-kun could use a break. Except I don't want that pervert here, we'll have to leave him out."

This is not the first time that Ranka has made such a proposition. Ranka seems to have decided that Kaoru's new status gives him a range of powers to be exercised at his discretion, and has repeatedly extended invitations to him to conduct club meetings on the premises. Each time, Kaoru readily agrees to stop by with the others. He's not lying but he's _not_ in a position to call the shots – he says it mainly to mitigate Ranka's sorrow.

Once… fine, twice – the palpable loneliness of this person before him had bothered him so much that he'd bolted to wherever Hikaru had happened to be, clutching at his twin like a lifeline to save himself from the vicious fear that had threatened to devour him.

Ranka is unaware of the effect that he has on people when he rhapsodises about Haruhi, unaware that Kaoru had once taken a liking to his daughter; he tells Kaoru about Haruhi's history and preferences, and Kaoru listens to it all even though it makes him feel almost physically ill to think of how he could have incorporated this knowledge to pursue Haruhi differently.

Kaoru would have told her that he's spent his life chasing after his mother's shadow, too.

Things like: the way he feels when his mother effortlessly identifies the designer of any article of clothing, its fashion house, its year, its collection but comes home after 6 months and calls him Hikaru; the way his early design sketches were exclusively to please her; that he requested his current spiky haircut to increase his resemblance to her; that he prank-called the offices in the hopes that she'd get fed up and admonish them so he could hear her voice; that, unlike Tamaki, he's run to the airport thousands, millions of times for his mother; and, most of all – how it's like to have a mother that's as dead as Haruhi's, only his gets resurrected every half a year and it's so excruciating that in his lowest moments he'd wished she would just depart for good.

Would Haruhi have liked him then? Thought of him as capable of connecting with her, believed him to be as courageous as Tamaki? It'd been a breeze to play the martyr since he had known he hadn't a prayer of being with her. If reciprocation hadn't been so unattainable, could he have reverted to friendship so coolly?

Kyouya would've been so disappointed in him for second-guessing himself.

"Ranka-papa," Kaoru says, bracing himself for the inevitable, "I have to go now. We'll visit some other time."

Without exception, Ranka always tries to keep him longer. It results in a dragged-out slugfest between the two of them, feinting and kicking and including everything from uppercuts to hooks to straight rights or lefts as Kaoru crawls out of the house and Ranka goes for the knockout like a champion boxer – it's totally brutal.

Kaoru's getting good at dogfights.

He makes it into his car at last, sagging like a sack of potatoes.

As he is chauffeured away, he remembers Haruhi's unresisting hand in his, remembers that she has made her choice, remembers that they are friends before they are anything else, and feels... _okay_.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**7 November 2010.**  
><strong>Sunday.<strong>

Kaoru hasn't been to the Ootori house since his talk with Hikaru.

The twins are frittering their time away magnificently, testing one computer game after another and syncing their souls together through their special channel.

His phone rings. It is an unknown caller; how odd.

"Hitachiin Kaoru?"

This scratchy voice...

Kaoru breaks into the widest grin of his life. "Yes, speaking."

"So, here's the deal."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

_Continued in Part B._


	8. Chapter 4B

**CHAPTER FOUR(B)**

**Attack of the Lady Proposals!**

.

**SLEZ SYNDROME MEDICINE READY FOR EUROPEAN RELEASE  
>Launch to begin in France in two weeks time, reports Hishikawa Hotaru.<br>Monday, 8 November 2010.**

**In conjunction with Suou Corporations and Grantaine Company, Japanese conglomerate Ootori Group has announced that the Slez Syndrome medicine which rocked the medical world is in the last stages of regulatory approval by the European Medicines Agency. The ****Agence Française de Sécurité Sanitaire des Produits de Santé**** is scheduled to authorise public hospitals to use the medicine as soon as all procedural hurdles are cleared.**

**Ootori Pharmaceuticals, the subsidiary of Ootori Group that manages the medicine, has indicated that the project will be headed by Suou Tamaki and Ootori Kyouya in a joint collaborative venture. Industry insiders predict that the grant of approval will be finalised in a month's time.**

"Kao-chan!"

Honey slams into the room dramatically, eyes wide and worried.

Behind him, Hikaru and Mori wear similar expressions, squeezing themselves through the doorway and moving to Kaoru anxiously. All three of them are exceedingly concerned about how he's taking the news.

"Yes?" Kaoru asks serenely.

They blink at him, unable to believe his calm composure.

Well, Kaoru agrees that he would have freaked out over this sort of news, except he'd known it before it had appeared in the evening publication. He's known it since the call yesterday, has held that knowledge throughout school hours and for the whole of his first class with Ren today.

Further, he could have told them that Ootori Pharmaceuticals had requested a short, unremarkable article to be published only after the conclusion of the school day in order that their schoolmates will not mob Tamaki and Kyouya with questions.

Although such news is not outlandish in their social circles, the morning papers would not provide the necessary cooling-off period for their schoolmates' excitement to settle. Given a night to stew over it, they would come to their senses about how _normal_ it is for final-year students to become involved in the family business.

They will not know that everything about this is abnormal because they do not know Kyouya.

Everyone starts talking over everyone else.

"Hnn," says Mori.

"Kao-chan, are you in shock? Why are you smiling?" Honey cries, shoving an immeasurable number of stuffed toys into his arms.

"You – Kaoru! Is that why? Are you too dazed to react? Don't worry, we're here!" Hikaru exclaims, cuddling him fretfully.

"Ack! Senpai! Hikaru! Can't breathe!"

Kaoru is neither in shock nor in a daze.

He is _royally_ _pissed off_.

Kyouya had been the one to determine that no one should ever endanger all of this, yet...!

Tamaki and Kyouya have a nasty habit of deciding by themselves that they can't trust them. They withdraw into their private lives when something terrible looms in the horizon, one of them claiming not to want to make them suffer, the other one behaving like he's invincible.

It is a habit, definitely, because some part of those two must know that they are loved by all of the club members, but they can't seem to quit their ingrained tendencies to cope with their problems on their own. He'd thought that Tamaki would have learnt, but then he'd remembered – ultimately, his discovery of his feelings for Haruhi and his reunion with his mother at the airport – hadn't they held his hand every step of the way, egged him on until he did what he should have?

More importantly, this problem, the person who's really facing this problem...

"I'm all right, senpais, Hikaru," Kaoru assures them.

And he is. He's not going to do anything crazy or foolish.

He is going to _wait and see_.

"Kaoru..." Hikaru trails off uncertainly.

"Those two senpais know how to take care of themselves," Kaoru smiles confidently at them and returns to creating his storyboard.

He knows that his anger is merely the veneer over the devastation that he feels at being excluded. How can Kaoru judge them when he understands too well the desire to keep his pain to himself? He shouldn't have allowed himself to get used to so much, to form that sense of entitlement to be told of the things that go on in his seniors' families. At the root of it, this has to do with their families and their families' businesses.

Kaoru can accept that.

He can.

He _can_.

He _can_... _not_.

Mori frowns at him. "Kaoru."

"Yes, senpai?"

All three of them are looking at him weirdly.

"Are you hungry? Will Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai stay for dinner? I'll ask the kitchen to make something scrumptious for tonight," he says, getting up from his chair to move to the intercom on the wall.

Mori grabs his arm firmly. "Sit down. Talk."

Resistance is futile; Kaoru does as he's ordered.

"Mori-senpai, please don't be unduly upset for me. Honey-senpai, Hikaru, you too. Kyouya-senpai was made to solve problems and not cause them. He does everything for a reason. We can cheer them on from the sidelines. Isn't it awesome that we're starting to do business with each other? The more dimensions we have in our friendship, the longer we'll last, right?"

They don't look very convinced.

He sighs. "We should send an email to Haruhi to make sure that she knows about it. I don't know if she reads the Business section of the newspapers."

But they do look very annoyed.

Kaoru falls silent, prepared to let them reprimand him however they wish. It's his lot as the youngest.

"I don't like you like this," Honey tells him directly.

"Yeah! Acting as if you don't care!" Hikaru agrees heatedly.

He sighs again.

"Would you prefer it if I cry?" he asks somewhat irritably.

"Mm." Mori answers affirmatively.

"Oh, for – come on, why is everyone expecting me to take this news the hardest? We're all friends and they didn't tell any of you either!"

"That's why we shouldn't let them get away with it, Kao-chan," Honey asserts reasonably.

_Good, good._ They are thinking as he is. He needs them to see it his way.

"Who says I'm letting them, senpai?"

That's got their full attention.

Kaoru begins to articulate his suspicions. "We all know that Ootori-sama, like Kyouya-senpai, believes in doing things the right way. When Yuuichi-san and Akito-san were still schooling, their father restricted their involvement in the business world so that they could focus on their studies. Normally, Ootori-sama wouldn't have interrupted Kyouya-senpai's education with such a large project; but I think, for a while now, Ootori-sama has found himself so satisfied with Kyouya-senpai's performance that he wants to take it to the next level.

"This is in addition to the fact that Ootori-sama knows that Kyouya-senpai and Tono are good friends. If they both handle the project, it is less of a burden on each. Since Tono has begun making regular flights to France to meet Grantaine-sama, and since Kyouya-senpai has such an effective Team, they could feasibly pull it off. I think, also, that this is Tono's first commission from his Obaa-sama."

And the only way a proposition like that would have been accepted by both families is if at least one of Kyouya's siblings had backed the idea.

Kaoru has a very good inkling of whom.

On the face of it, being appointed to head this project looks like a huge compliment to Kyouya, but what it actually does is diverts and disperses Kyouya's energies. Akito would think that any spotlight on Kyouya is a bad thing – it would not have occurred to him that an early entry to the business world may be prejudicial to Kyouya instead.

What makes this arrangement extremely adverse to Kyouya is the presence of _Tamaki_.

Tamaki, Kyouya's greatest treasure, is also his Achilles' heel.

Kaoru – stupid, _stupid_ Kaoru – had given that away.

Kyouya routinely ensures that he does not outshine his best friend in matters of import – if, as the third son, he makes his ambition too plain, the conservative Japanese society will swing in favour of the eldest's right to inherit.

Lastly, whether or not Ootori-sama has discerned these undercurrents, he will rubber-stamp it regardless to throw Kyouya off his pace. The more Kyouya looks like the heir apparent, the more he's going to come under fire from his own family. After all, this is what it really means to test a person – to push them to their limits and out of their comfort zone.

"Okay, so what does that mean? What do we do?" Hikaru questions urgently.

Kaoru knows that his twin gets cross with him for being manipulative, but he's made his choice and he needs to get his message across.

"We go on as usual. Other people's family matters, remember?" Kaoru says wryly, purposely using the words that Hikaru had used.

He sees his twin teeter on the verge of shouting that Kyouya and Tamaki are not _'other people'_... Then, the thunderbolt understanding of why Kaoru had persisted in going to Kyouya's house, and the dawning of the horrible realisation that their host club family is not really a family, and the ringing ramifications of adopting such an attitude.

Kaoru smiles grimly.

They have no legitimacy and no meaning to each other apart from the fragile ties that bind.

_I will keep us bound, no matter the personal cost._

"Senpais, Hikaru. It's not that I don't care. I don't have enough information to take any action, so I can only wait and watch for now, and trust that they know what they're doing. Don't you think it's unfair that we're prepared to let Kyouya-senpai deal with everything himself when all of us tried so hard for Tono? I'm grateful to the three of you for looking out for me, and I promise I will be cautious, but I have decided. I am not underestimating Kyouya-senpai but I won't overestimate him either. I am going to stay by Kyouya-senpai's side so that we can tide this over. Maybe it is arrogant of me," he says, feeling thoroughly human and giving into the urge to laugh at himself.

_I won't leave him to wage this war alone, even if he wants to._

.

* * *

><p><em>.<em>

"Describe the inspiration for your storyboard, Kaoru-kun."

"It's a dream. What I want to design is a dream. I am thinking of the context of dreams, the complete idea of it. The things that pass through people's heads all throughout the day, their fantasies; the things that pass through their heads at night, their sub-conscious," Kaoru explains, pointing to various segments of his board as he goes.

"Nightmares are dreams – the frightening elements are represented by gashes and cuts, and also by things that look unnatural and uncomfortable, like this collar that's modelled after a hangman's noose. Then I think about the opposite of dreams, or something different to it, or behind it. These 2 dresses are all function and no form – they're so ugly that they push me into a dream state if only to escape them."

Ren toys with the fabric swatch that he'd attached to his board. "Damaged silk?"

"Yes, I did all sorts of things to it that should never be done to silk," Kaoru grins. "I shredded the cloth using ikebana pruning techniques, and trimmed and bunched the paper-crisp bits to look like raw flower buds."

"Kazuha-sama would be proud," Ren laughs.

"The flowers look as fried as her hair."

Ren shoots him an obligatory stern look for his wisecrack.

Hands-on work is _incredible_. It feels real to him when he touches the fabrics – having them spill through his fingers, scratch his skin, crumple in his fist.

How time flies when he's having fun.

Kaoru's reluctant to leave, but he has something to attend to today.

He bids Ren goodbye and makes his way, on foot, to a nondescript café several streets away.

As anticipated, he is made to wait for his guest despite being of higher status. Understandable, when his guest is concerned about whether or not he will arrive with the police.

He orders a caramel cheesecake and tucks in, the sugar rush fuelling his already-inordinate excitement.

A huddled creature slithers into the seat across from him, reminding Kaoru of the way Nekozawa used to lurk at the fringes of their music room.

"Hacker-san," Kaoru greets, not hiding how charmed he is to see her again. "Which cake do you want? My treat."

She pushes an envelope towards him. "That makes me sound like a psychotic axe-wielding murderer. Besides, you use the term without knowing what it means."

He smiles indulgently, accustomed to eccentric types.

"We didn't get off to such a good start, did we? Hello, I'm Hitachiin Kaoru. You are?"

"There's no need for you to know my name. Don't get used to this."

Kaoru opens the envelope and retrieves its contents: information on Fuyumi's movements and on the Slez medicine distribution in Europe.

"Ara? Then why did Hacker-san " – she twitches – "come back to Japan with this? Surely Hacker-san hasn't run out of money?"

"My expenditure is nowhere near yours, Hitachiin-obocchama," she retorts spitefully.

"Hacker-san – "

"In what sort of capacity are you addressing me as Hacker-san? I am a _programmer_. If you're thinking about crackers you can forget about it," she rasps out between gritted teeth.

A _computer otaku_. Kaoru barely stifles a laugh. If he manages to get her on his team, he will definitely introduce her to Hikaru.

"How shall I address you then, Hacker-san? You won't tell me your name, Hacker-san! You did breach our security systems, Hacker-san!"

"You little _twerp_. Read those papers and be done with it."

Just to be abrasive, Kaoru slots everything back into the envelope, places it back on the table and rests his elbows on it.

She narrows her eyes at him, miffed, and stands up to head for the exit.

"Hacker-san, why did you come back?" he says, stopping her in her tracks.

She whirls around, furious. "You bought me a ticket that sent me to _Monale_! Don't think I don't know what you want! You cheat!"

"I sent you to the first country that cropped up in my mind," Kaoru responds insouciantly. "Nobody asked you to continue the research or to bring it back to me."

He had bet on it though – had _created a favourable situation_ like Kyouya frequently does.

She glares at him, speechless.

"Please sit down."

Poor Hacker-san vacillates at the request; it's not difficult to gain the upper hand over these socially maladjusted people.

Kaoru knows that well. He had been one of them, and had suffered total defeat at Tamaki's hands.

She droops back down.

"Hacker-san," Kaoru says seriously, "I'd only wished for it, not expected you to do it. True to my word, I have not sent anyone to follow up on you. The US$10,000 you asked for has been transferred into the account you provided, but let's stop pretending that you care about money."

"You want me to work for you," she scoffs.

"Yes," he concedes. "I have a lot to offer. You're the type of person who is curious and egoistic. You like learning as much as you can once you've started on a topic, and you want everyone to know what an expert you are."

She doesn't bristle at his statements, unlike people who are falsely modest on top of all their other flaws.

"I will undertake to supply you with the resources you want, and my family's power will shield you when you're doing those borderline illegal things that you like. I'll be realistic and say that complete immunity is not possible, though if you ever have a run-in with the law, I will pull out all the stops to bail you out. Such conditions cannot form part of a legal employment contract, so if you choose to accept, you'll have to take them on faith. Your salary is yours to negotiate."

"You're asking for a lot in return."

"Am I, really?" Kaoru inquires in his best Kyouya voice. "You are not to be a servant or even a personal assistant. You will retain use and control over the resources in your free time. Although you can no longer work in my father's company, our family has connections to all the major software and technology companies worth mentioning. Whenever you choose not to renew your contract with me, I will refer you to them and provide glowing reviews to propel you to whatever position you want."

She's enticed by his offer; this is where he should leave it. Pressing the issue will lead to contrary results.

Patiently, he gives her time to think it over as he peruses the documents:

Grantaine Company and Ootori Group are equipping Tamaki and Kyouya with a crew of employees to facilitate the distribution. Neither of his seniors would have had much say in the appointment of these people because their standing in their families' companies would not extend to dictating the work force.

Kaoru can see Grantaine-sama and Suou-sama attempting to surround their son with a careful selection of capable people – most of the Grantaine personnel appear to be members of the old guard that had been loyal to the Grantaines throughout their financial troubles.

Kyouya's side is rather more ambiguous. All of the Ootori personnel have high qualifications, but a fair few have worked under Yuuichi or Akito. Unknown quantities make any endeavour needlessly precarious.

Kaoru's eyebrows climb steadily up his forehead as he reads. He is shocked that Ootori-sama would go so far – it is almost _lunacy_, a baptism of fire, to invest an entire continent in his youngest.

"The families that your friend's sister have been meeting with – notice anything?" Hacker-san asks smugly.

Ah, so she'd gone and checked him out as well. Not that Kaoru had not seen that coming – the fame of the host club has its drawbacks.

_These families... Is there a common thread...? They – _

_Oh my god._

"Perhaps Kaoru-san will be asked to design the wedding gown?"

Kaoru snaps his head up, prepared to cut her down to size – and stops short at her artless expression.

He's utterly perplexed; wasn't she being snide?

Belatedly, he deduces that she thinks of him as Kyouya's _friend_, and had assumed that he would be happy for Kyouya, that he would think it an honour to lend his support to whatever marriage lies in store for his friend.

She doesn't know that he would rather _die_ than let someone else take away their Kyouya.

All of these noble, influential families have daughters that are within their age range – Kaoru really wouldn't call it a 'marriageable age' – and have blemish-free public lives. They look like ideal candidates for the ideal Kyouya in an ideal union between two houses.

Ootori-sama's ideals.

Fuyumi must have been summoned by her father to represent the Ootoris in place of their late matriarch. The duty of ensuring that her younger siblings marry well has fallen to her. That must be the business that she had to carry out to uphold both her families' names! If that's true, Fuyumi will necessarily be permitted in the Ootori house to make the arrangements.

Kaoru'll have to pay close attention so that he'll know when to sabotage the matchmaking.

Wait – wait, he's overreacting! Kyouya has an elder brother who is unmarried!

"Who is Fuyumi-san making the match for?" Kaoru asks, trying to suppress his uneasiness. It might be for Akito; it's more likely that it's Akito! The Ootoris can be excessively traditionalistic – wouldn't Ootori-sama marry them off in their order of birth?

"Don't know."

Kaoru exhales dejectedly. "Can you find out?"

"Those Ootoris aren't exactly a walk in the park, you know. I mostly exploited the weaknesses in the other parties' defences," she divulges.

His head is reeling with loose bits of information; he needs time alone to mull it over.

"Hacker-san, do you have an answer? If you don't want to commit fully, you can freelance for me until you've dispelled your doubts. Otherwise, I don't expect to have any more to do with you after today," Kaoru gives his final word on the issue.

"I... I think I will accept," she says, bony hands curled around her porcelain teacup.

Although they are worlds apart in physical appearance and posture, Kaoru sees in her the person that he would have become had Tamaki not jumped in and derailed his life so spectacularly. That swirl of hope and despair, of pride and insecurity, of loneliness and self-sufficiency –

He is Tamaki and she is _him_ and Kaoru feels a stab of self-loathing so fierce that it robs him of his breath.

"Kaoru-san?"

He collects his wits and steadies himself. He's achieved his purpose – now is not the time to dissect his feelings.

"Welcome onboard, Hacker-san!" he whoops, overjoyed.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The new information he'd received had kept him up all night. He'd tossed and turned, alternating between distress and anger, and in the end Hikaru had rolled onto him – imprisoning him against the bed as he mumbled half-formed threats about moving in with Mori permanently – and proceeded to fall asleep on top of him.

His sleepy state hadn't done him any favours during his lesson with Ren. His fingers are still smarting from multiple pricks of the needle when at last he arrives home.

The servant at the door bows to him.

"Kaoru-sama, Ootori-sama is waiting for you in the lounge."

Kaoru gasps in pleased surprise, and he takes off like a bullet, all exhaustion forgotten.

"Kyou – !"

He comes to a screeching halt at the sight of Yuuichi.

"You haven't been coming around lately, Kaoru-kun."

In his head he's screaming in horror, but his cordial expression has already fallen into place.

"Yuuichi-san! Long time no see," Kaoru nods vacantly.

"I confess to being stupefied that you did not attempt to seek out Kyouya after finding out that he will be heading the European project with Tamaki-kun," Yuuichi says, and Kaoru senses a smile.

_Gah. Are we back to this again?!_

He is impossibly averse to playing this guessing game with Yuuichi.

"That's an assignment that Ootori-sama has set for Kyouya-senpai. Pestering him about it isn't going to change anything," Kaoru parries.

"My, a 180-degree turn," Yuuichi comments, and Kaoru figures out who has been hiding his daily visits from Kyouya.

Carefully concealing his reactions, he offers up his Hitachiin hospitality to Yuuichi, pouring tea and providing snacks. Kaoru is very much on edge – he feels that the atmosphere between them should be rife with distrust and wariness, but Yuuichi is actively dampening any antagonistic vibes that Kaoru is sending out.

"Why are you so ill at ease around me, Kaoru-kun?"

Yuuichi likes to use _un_-Ootori manoeuvres to catch him off guard. It is very unconventional that a member of that family will speak his or her motives so explicitly, or ask questions that are so socially blunt.

It makes Kaoru want to be heinously rude to him.

"I'm tired, that is all, Yuuichi-san."

"And feeling blue, I think? Considering my little brother and his friend have been keeping you out of the loop."

Kaoru is beginning to realise that the more he resists Yuuichi's game, the more he falls for it; but how can he play along? How can he condone using Kyouya as a stake in this dangerous roulette?

"Are there friends in the world who've never fought?" he replies rhetorically, lifting the pot to refill Yuuichi's cup.

They sip at their tea, neither looking at the other.

"Mm," Yuuichi sighs, "When Tamaki-kun first visited us in our house, we were drinking this flavour of tea as we listened to him play the piano."

Kaoru feels a part of himself ignite. He has a damnably inquisitive nature, a fact that must be apparent to all and sundry. He's only ever heard snippets of how Tamaki and Kyouya became friends, and of course he is not impervious to Yuuichi's words.

"Tamaki-kun performed a composition of his own, modelled after Chopin," Yuuichi volunteers. "Do you know, Kaoru-kun, that music is worthless, unless it can make a complete stranger break down and cry?"

He can imagine being part of the audience, transported by Tamaki's unparalleled music into a place of romanticism and elegance; he can imagine Kyouya being drawn in, like a moth to naked flame, cracked wings helpless against the winds of change.

Is this why people without a twin don't throw themselves off the nearest cliffs at the earliest opportunity? Because they spend their lives with bated breath, living on in the hopes of angels, rose-tinted hearts convincing themselves that someone divine is out there waiting for them, waiting to make their lives worth the living?

Kaoru doesn't like the idea that they've all been waiting for Tamaki to merge his path with theirs. It makes him nervous to think that they're caught in Tamaki's orbit, revolving around him until the day the star burns out.

That's way too many eggs to put in one basket.

"You are to be the next club president, aren't you? It's a shame that you'll be constantly compared to Tamaki-kun. You don't have the magic he has. In your industry, especially, where creativity is everything, isn't it disgraceful to be a second-rate charlatan?" Yuuichi states matter-of-factly.

Kaoru stares at him blankly.

"Yuuichi-san, that is inconsequential to the task that I've been given. The task is to run the club," he answers without the slightest hint of emotion.

"The equivalent of Kyouya's role? Let's not fool ourselves about your little club's chances of success without Tamaki-kun."

Kaoru is reluctantly impressed with how Yuuichi never allows himself to dip into condescending expressions or tones – his face scholarly and his demeanour civil, he prevents his opponent from throwing up the necessary walls to block the brunt of his words, making them doubly malicious to the recipient. It's difficult enough to tell whether Yuuichi actually means what he says, or whether he's using them as mere weapons.

Abruptly, he senses a laugh from Yuuichi, though on the surface there is _absolutely_ _no indicator_ of it.

"Kaoru-kun, you are a very cute boy."

He is really grating on Kaoru's last nerve.

"Life is imperfect. We all have to make sacrifices for the things we want," Yuuichi continues, thankfully sparing Kaoru from having to reply. "Beware that you don't end up sacrificing twice as much as Tamaki-kun to get less than half of what he has."

Half of Haruhi's and Kyouya's hearts doesn't sound like some shoddy deal to Kaoru, seriously.

"Are you making sacrifices, Yuuichi-san?" Kaoru asks archly, going on the offensive. "What does Yuuichi-san want? What are your sacrifices?"

He sees Yuuichi straighten up a little, back going taut.

"Can't you guess, Kaoru-kun? I'm surprised at you."

"Well," Kaoru says flippantly, "Normal people would feel sad about having their family relationships break down. If a person is happy to trade something away, though, can it still be called a sacrifice?"

"That is correct: a sacrifice must be something that a person is unwilling to part with. My sacrifice," Yuuichi reveals, unreadable eyes pinning Kaoru to the spot, "is that I will never be able to love my siblings."

Kaoru scoffs blatantly. "Do you even want to?"

"Haven't you met them? Haven't you realised how easy they are to love?"

Yes, and yes, but that doesn't mean that Kaoru is obliged to believe that declaration. He shakes his head superciliously, projecting his 'brat' vibe to goad Yuuichi.

Yuuichi stands, ostensibly to bring this meeting to an end.

"Come visit more often, Kaoru-kun. Fuyumi and I believe that you are a positive influence on Kyouya," he entreats kindly, as if Kaoru had had the choice one way or another. "Since Kyouya is not the only capable Ootori, I don't expect that it will be an easy fight for him. Your friendship will surely grant him some respite. Of course, if he loses, you'll go down with him, but that's a small price to pay for what we love, don't you agree?"

Kaoru does not walk his guest out despite his juniority; he remains seated, mind and body numb from the clanging reverberations of the gauntlet being thrown.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Kaoru-kun, I can't teach you if you aren't concentrating," Ren sighs, letting the muslin cloth slip off the mannequin as she approaches her inattentive student. "I'm going to give you two options: either you tell me what's upsetting you, or you go home to sleep it off and we'll resume this lesson tomorrow."

Kaoru jolts out of the listless stupor he hadn't even realised he'd fallen into. "Sorry, sensei."

Yesterday night had been the second in a row that he hadn't gotten any sleep. He'd given in to hysteria, calling up Hacker-san and flinging all his worries at her, insisting that she do more research immediately. Hacker-san, not having much social acumen, had panicked along with him, resulting in the two of them flipping out like loose cannons until they finally got their act together and began setting up a network around Yuuichi so that they can keep abreast of his plans.

As they'd laid out their skeleton plan, the one thing that Hacker-san had _not _said to him was "this is impossible'. Nor did she express any reservations about going against the dominance of the Ootori family.

Outlaws just always have this wonderful mentality.

Kaoru likes that.

Notwithstanding that the twins' motto is 'Question Authority!', Kyouya had repeatedly drilled into him the lesson that only by believing in the possibility of something can it ever be achieved.

"I don't much care for an apology, Kaoru-kun," Ren says mildly. "What I care about is that we make productive use of our time."

Of all people, Kaoru should know what a valuable commodity time is to all fashion designers. "Yes, sensei," he says sheepishly.

"Pick an option." Her tone brooks no refusal.

"I'll go home, O-Ren-san," Kaoru decides. Not to sleep, no – to place an order for the high-tech equipment that they would need in order to commence their detective work. The selection of the equipment must be tailored to Hacker-san's sensibilities, and it will not be a simple delivery as the equipment is unlikely to be commercially available or affordable.

Worse still, they'll have to obtain it without alerting anyone who may already be watching their movements.

"I see, Kaoru-kun. In that case, please tell me what is upsetting you."

"Huh?" Kaoru asks, puzzled. "It's all right, O-Ren-san, I'll – "

"No," Ren asserts firmly. "I know you picked to do the second, but I want you to do the first."

_Why'd she bother letting me choose, then? _

Kaoru really doesn't want to say much about his friend's private matters.

She smiles at him.

"If you go against what people want, you're far more likely to get a reaction from them," Ren explains. "An _honest_ reaction, too."

A light bulb goes off in Kaoru's head, dazzling him for a moment.

By doing exactly what he's expected to do – what Kyouya wants him to do – he's never going to get his answer in time.

The both of them are similar in the approach they prefer – they either observe in the wings or operate behind the screen; always passive tactics, moving only when they have certainty. Kyouya knows Kaoru is partial to the same way of doing things. If Kaoru keeps researching _around_ Kyouya rather than _through_ Kyouya, he'll be too slow to get through.

He needs to cut through all the miscellaneous waffle and go for something uncharacteristically aggressive.

"O-Ren-san! You're a genius!" Kaoru exclaims as he scrambles off his chair and stuffs everything into his bag.

"But of course. Yuzuha-sama never hires mediocre people."

He straightens up, feeling a bit bad about wanting to leave early. "I – I need to – "

"Figured out the solution to your problem, have you? Oh well. Go, then – "

Before she has finished giving her permission, Kaoru is already halfway out the door.

" – but no excuses for the next lesson, Kaoru-kun!"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Honey-senpai!"

Kaoru bursts in dramatically in a role-reversed parody.

Honey jerks his head up in alarm. "Kao-chan! What? What?"

"Honey-senpai, I need help getting into Kyouya-senpai's house," Kaoru says, unleashing a barrage of words. "I can get into his room without anyone noticing, but that time the servants let me in the main door. We can access the medical wing of the house through this window; it's too high for me to get in without your assistance, senpai. If we go late at night or early in the morning, Kyouya-senpai's Team won't be at the house, which will make it easier for us to evade capture because those three watch over Kyouya-senpai like hawks. Then, once we go through the window, we'll be in the third floor corridor. I know my way around the house from inside. I think we should go tonight, senpai, since Kyouya-senpai is a night owl. If we go tomorrow morning he might be asleep and wake up furious and that defeats the purpose."

Honey looks at him, flummoxed.

Somewhere in Honey's residence, Yasuchika is wailing about something – probably to Satoshi?

Idly, Kaoru wonders how loud Yasuchika has to be for them to hear him. What could possibly warrant such ardent proclamations? Are the walls in Honey's house in need of repair? Or –

"... Kao-chan, did you hit your head somewhere?"

_Ow._ Kaoru has always known that Honey has bite under his sweetness, though he usually directs these piquant comments to Mori and the candy-coated caustic ones to Tamaki.

_Never_ to Kaoru.

"Senpai!" Kaoru cries in protest, sniffling back crocodile tears.

He sees Honey soften, because it is him crying, and not because Honey doesn't know that he's staging it.

"Why do you want to do this?"

Kaoru rattles out his reasoning for Honey's analysis.

"... So, that's why, senpai. Can we go? I've called Hikaru, he says he's staying with Mori-senpai for the night. Please, senpai? Please?" he wheedles.

An ancillary benefit of bringing Honey along is his ability to take on the entire Ootori army single-handedly.

As a last resort.

Just in case.

Honey's eyes have a darkish tint in them as he ponders over Kaoru's request, almost as though he's calculating how many butts he'll have to kick if the plan goes awry.

"Tonight is Cake Night," Honey says musingly.

Kaoru shrivels up, crushed. Cakes are too strong an opponent for him.

"I'll go, if..."

He perks up excitedly.

"If Kao-chan accompanies me during the next Cake Night!" Honey finishes.

"Deal!" Kaoru agrees without hesitation.

"Let's go to the dojo to collect some supplies. We leave as soon as the clock strikes eleven."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Kaoru is blown away by the military precision with which Honey executes his plans. Small wonder that Honey's family is highly sought-after in the training of army regiments.

They'd left the Haninozuka residence at 2300 hours on the dot, decked out with an array of tools for invasion and combat: dark clothes, noiseless shoes, rope, belay devices, pulley devices, ascenders, descenders, flashlight, swiss army knife, bunny shuriken.

He is under strict instructions to follow Honey's lead.

The plan is to build a makeshift pulley system that will allow Honey to levitate Kaoru to the window. Honey himself has a variety of ways to accomplish the journey from ground to third floor, to be determined by whatever the situation calls for.

"Kao-chan," Honey whispers, "Attach yourself to this rope securely like I taught you."

Adrenaline is pumping in Kaoru's blood, making him hypersensitive to his surroundings. He does as commanded, preparing himself to be whooshed upwards. It is ingenious, the way Honey uses a combination of ledges and outcroppings – in less than five seconds, Kaoru is tumbling through the window into the corridor.

The pulley system lessens the burden of his weight on Honey, but _still_.

Another five seconds, and Honey materialises by his side.

"Now take the lead, Kao-chan."

They glide swiftly through the deserted areas and creep along when they enter the central portion of the house. Honey's senses and instincts keep them from discovery by alerting them to other human presences.

The Ootori reputation tends to have a deterrent effect all on its own; not many people would attempt to break into their house as there are families with comparable wealth but laxer security. The less something is tested, however, the less it is improved.

That would explain how Kaoru has, as of this moment, managed to breach their security twice.

"Kyouya-senpai."

This is the closest Kaoru has ever seen Kyouya to being completely and utterly floored.

It is really, really, _really _satisfying.

He gives his senior a quick once-over: Kyouya looks totally _wrecked_, only just skirting the brink of consciousness.

For an instant, it seems as though Kyouya doesn't know what to do with himself or with them. Then, he throws his head back and laughs.

An honest-to-goodness laugh that causes a warm feeling to spread through Kaoru's core.

"So bold, Hitachiin Kaoru," Kyouya addresses him at last, eyes sparkling. "Sit, you impertinent little devil. Honey-senpai, please sit."

"Kyou-chan, you should go to sleep," Honey advises sagely, as they both navigate their way to the sofa. The room is flooded with papers, information on the Slez Syndrome Medicine, on Ootori Pharmaceuticals and –

Mountains and mountains of data on noble families and, presumably, on prospective spouses.

Kaoru lets his gaze linger on a sheet with a picture of a princess from some far off land, and when he raises his head Kyouya is already studying him, they lock eyes:

_I know_, he says.

_I know you know_, Kyouya replies.

_I'm angry._

_Why do you think I kept it from you?_

_I'm angry that you kept it from us._

Instead of answering, Kyouya pushes an indistinct feeling towards him...

_I hadn't wanted you to know, hadn't wanted any marriage plans, hadn't wanted to say it._

_I had my hands full with the European project, had tried to dismantle the match, had wanted to say it._

Honey settles on the sofa, Usa-chan in his arms. "Game's up for you, Kyou-chan. Out with it."

Kaoru has to admit, point-blank directness is very refreshing on occasion.

Kyouya sighs. "I believe Kaoru has uncovered and deciphered most of what there is to know."

Both Honey and Kaoru are unmoved; they watch him neutrally, warning him that they will not readily let him off the hook.

"It appears," Kyouya discloses, removing his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose, "that my application to a foreign university was a cause for concern for some of my family. It has incited some unwanted suspicions on my brothers' parts, despite the pains I took to justify my decision with cogent and reasonable explanations. I have been laying the groundwork for this for a year; my minor deviation from the paths that my brothers took should not have led to this result... Unless, perchance, somebody's influential parents have been unnecessarily implying that they would endorse choosing me as heir. My father is not easily swayed, but he would jump on the opportunity to stretch my abilities."

Kaoru nods in understanding; indeed, though Ootori-sama will want to make up his own mind about who is to succeed him, he cannot fail to factor in the prospect of all the host club members' families throwing their support behind Kyouya, heavily tilting the balance in his favour. None of the top families would be transparent about it, since it has to do with 'other people's families' – however, beneath the artificialities lies the reality of their exclusive and cliquish society, wherein _everyone_ has an intangible interest in 'other people's families'. For all their power, their businesses cannot operate in isolation.

The worst case scenario is that of factional politics – Affiliation Kyouya versus Affiliation Yuuichi – which would expose the Ootori family to external attacks. An empire is always at its weakest during a change at the helm; the longer it takes to consolidate a new ruler, the longer its enemies have to exploit its state of flux. Kaoru would bet on it that there are plenty of people out there salivating at the thought of such a thing ever occurring.

Much like their son, Tamaki's parents must absolutely adore Kyouya. Unfortunately, they also have the knack of botching Kyouya's best laid plans while harbouring nothing but the most saintly of intentions.

Kaoru can connect the remainder of the dots without difficulty: (likely) prompted by Suou Tamaki, proposed by Suou Yuzuru and Anne-Sophie Grantaine, approved by Suou Shizue, backed by Ootori Yuuichi, and presented to Ootori Yoshio, the inception of the European project had been like a conspiracy plotted around Kyouya – comically, half of those people had clearly meant for this project to be for Kyouya's benefit.

That'd be why Kyouya had been upset at Tamaki – not as much as he'd been regarding the school sports festival as there is actual merit to be gained here. It stuns Kaoru that Tamaki would dare to involve himself in Kyouya's professional life. Does he mean to show the world that the both of them can conduct themselves on an equal footing? Is he so foolhardily oblivious to the effect he has on his best friend?

"Maybe now you'll tell me the full reason you appointed me as future president, senpai?" Kaoru asks evenly.

He hasn't forgotten that Tamaki had wanted him to help out with club activities when he'd eavesdropped on their conversation in this very room; he had noted the drastic u-turn when Kyouya had told him of Tamaki's opposition against his appointment.

Kyouya returns his gaze stiffly.

The pieces slot into place – Kyouya had played Kaoru into taking over his responsibilities with the club because he had become aware of the impending project, and had needed to free up some of his time to cope with everything at once.

Logically, this indicates that Tamaki's objections had been partially about the unscrupulous way they were going to shirk their duties. Tamaki's always believed in them more than they believe in themselves, and he recognises that others have feelings that he should not trample on.

Kaoru is... feeling a funny emotion he'd rather not analyse.

He accepts that Kyouya needs to win, and it's better for all concerned to leave it at that.

Like a pendulum, Honey's head turns from one to the other – he has a puzzled expression on his face that Kaoru knows is mere pretence. Honey is much sharper than many people give him credit for, and he would have come to the same conclusions from what he doubtlessly remembers from Kaoru's periodic reports.

"How is marriage related to this project?" Kaoru breaks the momentary silence, not wanting to put Kyouya in a spot.

"Because," Honey answers in lieu of their exhausted friend, "Ootori-sama wants to know who Kyou-chan's and Akito-san's spouses will be, so that when he names his heir, he has already eliminated any unpredictable elements. It's not _marriage_ that is important at this point, right, Kyou-chan? It's a binding engagement that Kyou-chan's father wants, to ensure that he doesn't gain a daughter-in-law that he views as unsuitable."

Honey flicks a glance at Kaoru, adding: _like her husband, Kyou-chan's sister-in-law is here to size up her competition_.

Kyouya nods once, confirming Honey's hypotheses.

"And you saw fit to tell only Tono but not us?" Kaoru asks, unaccountably upset.

"I said nothing to him in relation to the marriage plans," Kyouya contradicts. "His mother told him."

Kaoru smiles at Kyouya tentatively, to demonstrate that there're no hard feelings between them, that he acknowledges the awkward predicament Kyouya had been in.

Honey gives him a peculiar look that disappears in the bat of an eye.

The three of them sit amidst the shadows of the betrothal documents – one of these families will fulfil Ootori-sama's criteria, and the Ootori family will in turn fulfil their criteria.

"What'll happen when your father comes back, senpai?"

"Fuyumi-neesan will give him a summary of all the candidates she's been interviewing, and based on her recommendations, they'll narrow down the list to a handful," Kyouya answers apathetically. "Our families will meet formally, and they'll come to a verdict."

It hurts Kaoru that Kyouya has already resigned himself to it, come what may.

He has been thinking – as optimistically as possible – that although arranged marriages are the norm and not the exception at their level of society, in these modern times many of them have been increasingly able to find a partner that they are at least fond of. Anyone who can gain Kyouya's fondness or even love must be someone worth knowing.

"Kyouya-senpai," he says encouragingly, "We know Ootori-sama is strict and authoritarian, but we won't give up hope that you'll get a happy ending."

"Mmmm-hm!" Honey tweets like a bird in spring.

They know that Kyouya puts on that pleasant visage only to appease them.

"Sleep, Kyou-chan," Honey orders.

Kaoru is endlessly grateful to Honey for exercising the leverage that he has over Kyouya.

A slight strain edges into Kyouya's fake congeniality. "I will as soon as I have completed my work, Honey-senpai."

"I'll do it for you," Kaoru proposes, reaching for the photographs and scribbled writings. He recognises what Kyouya is doing – sorting and filing the papers neatly according to his exacting requirements.

"There's no need, little devil," Kyouya declines, attempting to politely tug them out of Kaoru's grip. "It's nearly one o'clock. Do you and Honey-senpai wish to go home, or should I prepare the guest rooms?"

"Oh, does Kyou-chan know that it's late?"

Kaoru and Kyouya pause in their movements.

Kyouya is the other person that Honey _never_ takes this sugar-acid tone with. Honey is accustomed to hitting the hay at nine; without the cakes to fuel him tonight, he's probably getting cranky.

"Go and sleep, senpais. You're both tired. You know I'll do this perfectly."

Kyouya is unusually recalcitrant – a split second later, Kaoru catches on.

"Kyouya-senpai," he says quietly, "I know that all of this information is intensely personal."

He's been through Kyouya's dossiers before, has firsthand knowledge of the type of comments that Kyouya makes in the margins. If Kyouya's observations on the average person are absurdly detailed, prospective partners must surely receive tenfold the attention.

Kaoru keeps his hands still and docile, willing to let Kyouya make this decision without applying undue pressure.

Kyouya caves.

"Fine. Honey-senpai, I'll call the servants to – "

They both turn to Honey, who is nestled snugly in the sofa, fast asleep.

Kyouya heaves a sigh. "There'll be no waking him now."

Grinning widely, Kaoru makes his way to Honey's side on his knees. "He lasted as long as he could. He'd had to eat a cake before coming here so that he would have sufficient energy, you know."

"It's unreliable to function solely from sugar rushes," Kyouya remarks sourly. "We can't leave him here."

"He might catch a chill," Kaoru agrees. "Could we have some blankets, senpai?"

Kyouya frowns.

"Don't be ridiculous. It's _November_," Kyouya emphasises, lifting Honey into his arms smoothly. "I'll take him upstairs."

The crinkling of papers draws Kaoru's attention downwards to his hands. He sees a blond-haired girl with a strong resemblance to Grantaine-sama, and hence a strong resemblance to Tamaki: Princess Michelle of Monale, for whom they'd organised that hilarious elephant parade. He pictures Kyouya in a sham of a marriage to a person who looks like someone else he loves, and feels queasy at how inherently wrong it is.

An ill-omened feeling washes over him like a tidal wave, causing him to shudder.

For hours, he toils away, doggedly keeping sleep at bay. This reminds him of the time he'd spent in the archive, mechanically grinding through the motions like an automaton. He should be putting more effort into studying the backgrounds of these ladies, in the event that it becomes critical to possess such knowledge in the future, but frankly he can't be bothered anymore. Chikako can just shove her opinion where the sun doesn't –

Kaoru drops a file in surprise.

It's all clear to him now.

It wasn't his mother that he had disrespected. It had been _Chikako_.

The designs are his mother's, but once they pass into the archive, they also pass into Chikako's domain – they become _hers_.

That's right; she'd been hinting that Kaoru hadn't given her work the respect it was due because he didn't value it, because he didn't value her, or for that matter anyone else in his mother's company save his mother.

Bringing up that childhood incident had been her way of telling him that they, the workers in the atelier, had found it offensive that Kaoru and his twin had viewed everyone as generic and substitutable... and, they'd thought that this was an attitude unbefitting of an artist.

It is an affront that Kaoru must make amends for in the future. The company owes its success to all of its employees, a fact that he will do well to remember as a contender for his mother's legacy.

The same distortion must be taking place in Kyouya too, decreasing his chances of a meaningful matrimony by the minute as his father makes him go through the dossiers as though these people have no worth except from the possible merits that they can bring to the family.

It's the cold reality of their lives, but Kaoru has never been particularly good at keeping grounded.

He is deeply devoted to fantasy and constructed worlds, to self-expression and creativity. Everything in him rebels at the utilitarian cage, everyday he fears that his friends may become enslaved by it.

His fingernails carve savage crescents into his palms as he succumbs to his wayward thoughts.

"Kaoru," calls a gentle voice, snapping him out of his reverie. "Leave it. Come to bed."

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* * *

><p>.<p>

Kaoru yawns dazedly, having woken up for no reason in the middle of the night.

When he regains his bearings, he finds himself chest down and half-draped on Kyouya, hips curved against hips, legs tangled with his senior's in a way that he's not sure is appropriate.

He makes to draw away, but –

There is a weight on his back.

Honey and Usa-chan, he realises.

Honey has one arm curled around Kaoru's torso and one leg that's almost pushed between both of his.

Kaoru is _sandwiched between_ the Low Blood Pressure Evil Lord _and_ the Low Blood Pressure Beast and it's causing him to have dangerously high blood pressure.

Furtively, he tries to wriggle himself free; a more hazardous enterprise he has never undertaken.

Honey lets out a sleepy snuffle and Kaoru nearly has a fit.

He had lifted himself to about an inch over Kyouya, hovering indecisively; no solution comes to him, and he timidly lowers himself back down.

What a dilemma.

Several more experiments are abandoned until suddenly his head lurches forward, courtesy of a cool and unyielding hand.

"Nngh," Kyouya commands without opening his eyes.

Kaoru hadn't counted on Kyouya being the one to awaken – he's always been a deep sleeper. It must be the unfamiliar sensation of having someone beside him.

In this position, whenever Kaoru blinks, his eyelashes brush Kyouya's neck in an indecently intimate manner. With each breath that his seniors take, he can feel the soft expand-and-contract of their ribcages.

He cannot help but be hyperaware of the length of his right thigh against Kyouya's and the length of his left against Honey's, and being in the cocoon of their embrace is... really...

Tamaki's puritanical morals blare in his head.

"Senpai," whispers his self-destructive streak.

No response.

He feels discomfited precisely because he... _enjoys _their proximity?

No, no, his brain is addled from sleep deprivation.

If he extricates himself in one quick move, slipping away to the far end of the room, neither senior will exert himself to lasso him back to the bed.

"Kaoru, if you so much as disturb the blankets, you will not survive the night."

His blood curdles at the sinister threat, delivered lowly and slickly in the consuming dark.

Compliantly, he relaxes into their bodies.

"You just want me to stay here so you can steal my warmth for that pair of icicles that passes as your legs," he teases.

Underneath Kaoru's palm, he can feel tiny stirrings of amusement so close to him that they intermingle into his lungs, his heart, crystallising into the purest of laughter, needing no corporeal expression and belonging to them alone.

"Kao-chan, I don't like talking pillows," Honey interjects in his scary blood type AB voice.

The three of them fall into a quiescent state, drifting blissfully in the pre-dawn tranquillity.

Kaoru's never set much store by propriety anyway.

This arrangement – to spend eternity this way – that'll be –

The seed of a hugely significant and frightening paradigm shift is planted within Kaoru in the moments before sleep takes him.

Come morning, it has germinated; its roots have taken hold irreversibly, and a little baby sprout emerges innocuously, knowing nothing of the storms it will have to weather.

.

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><p>.<p>

Notes

Bumper update!

(a) In Chapter 67 page 13, Tamaki mentions that he has been able to tell the twins apart for a while already. Please ignore that for the purposes of 1-7th. I am happy that Tamaki in canon is able to differentiate between them, but Tamaki remains at the '50-50 correct guesses' stage for now. In this respect, I feel like the canon glossed over it, sort of like we're supposed to accept that as time wore on, Tamaki naturally became able to tell them apart. Plausible though that is, 1-7th is at its heart a story about one of the twins, so it will be relevant that Tamaki relates to each of them individually, and how he comes to accomplish that will be examined through the process of telling them apart.

(b) I am pleased to confirm that Fuyumi is, indeed, older than Akito in canon. In Chapter 33 page 6, she addresses Yuuichi as 'Yuuichi-niisan' but simply calls Akito by name. Akito must therefore be the third child in the family, younger than Fuyumi.

(c) Onee-chan, the only nanny that the twins liked, is canon in the Volume 7 Omake and Episode 20 (The Door the Twins Opened), in which she stole their coin bank and made them cry. She often regaled them with stories of her criminal escapades and also prompted the twins to master the art of fake smiles.

(d) In real life, Japan Fashion Week did take place at a time coinciding with that of the fic: 19-25 October 2010.

(e) For non-American readers, or for readers unfamiliar with the American college application system, here is some basic information:

Early Decision (ED) and Early Action (EA) applications are early admissions policies used for admitting freshmen to undergraduate programs in the US. Candidates typically submit their applications earlier (end October/early November) than regular decision applications (by January 1st).

ED is binding on the student while EA is not. Not all Ivies offer ED and/or EA.

Kyouya has submitted an EA application to Yale. Yale's policy is the Single-Choice Early Action, which means that if a candidate applies to Yale under the EA, s/he cannot apply to any other university for early admission.

Later added note: In 2011, Harvard has announced that they will now have an early entrance program.

(f) The NTT is the Nippon Telegraph and Telephone Corporation (日本電信電話株式会社 Nippon Denshin Denwa Kabushiki-gaisha).

(g) The Kingdom of Monale is fictional, referenced in Chapters 38-40. Princess Michelle of Monale looks very much like Tamaki's mother.

(h) The twins' father is the CEO of a software development company (Chapter 25 page 23).

(i) Kaoru's explanation of his storyboard is an amalgamation of quotes that have been largely gacked from Rei Kawakubo, Japanese fashion designer of Comme des Garçons fame. Kawakubo's art is intelligent; she is a cerebral designer, the way I imagine Kaoru would be. Kaoru also subscribes to fantasy, kind of like John Galliano in his best years with Dior, and Hikaru subscribes to showmanship, like Galliano in all his years wherever he is. Hikaru, I think, is likely to provoke, challenge, and exhibit contrariness similar to Miuccia Prada.

(j) There are three broad categories of hackers – computer security, programmer subculture, and hobbyist. Hacker-san considers herself as a member of the programmer subculture. I'd explain in detail but my notes are always too long! PM me if you want to know more, otherwise Wikipedia is your friend!

(k) An example of Kyouya creating a favourable situation is in Chapter 25 page 15. This is the way Kyouya will be characterised – I confess I have never understood why some people think that Kyouya is not a gambler, or why some people think that Kyouya never acts unless there is absolutely no chance of failure. The truth about life is that very few things are 100% certain, and that is something that I believe Kyouya appreciates. All right, perhaps 'gambler' is too strong a term, but I am certain that Kyouya takes many calculated gambles, because astute risk-taking is an integral part of _success_.

(l) The composition that Tamaki plays in Episode 24 of the anime is not a Chopin, despite many people assuming that it is so. The music director of Ouran, Yoshihisa Hirano, wrote the composition himself in Chopin style. I found this out from a forum, where someone had written a letter to Yoshihisa-san to ask about the piece. If you want the link to the forum, please PM.

(m) Yuuichi's statement about 'music being worthless unless…' is from a song, The Dumbing Down of Love, by Frou Frou.

(n) One day, there won't be enough letters in the alphabet for my notes. Anyway, the last note is that Honey's bunny shuriken is in Chapter 72 page 13.

(o) To my dear grawrded who specifically requested for this, and for all of you readers too, here is the picture reference for Kaoru, Honey and Kyouya's end positions: yuufee . deviantart art/Happy-Birthday-Potionwine-356080000 or click on the link provided in my profile. This fanart was kindly created and gifted to me by **Yuufee** on deviantart.

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_Next Chapter:_

_5. White Team Fight!_


	9. Chapter 5A

**CHAPTER FIVE(A)**

**White Team Fight!**

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_The eponymous White Team of the title is found in the sports festival arc (chapters 46-49)._

_Its members are Kaoru, Honey and Kyouya._

_They were humorously dubbed the 'Black Team' by the other four hosts as a reference to their true natures._

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* * *

><p>.<p>

**A.**

This is Kaoru.

A Hitachiin, and everything that the family name entails.

A twin, with all its privileges and burdens.

A schemer, and the sneakier half.

Deputy of the White Team.

From: Hitachiin Twins [doubletrouble (a) ouranhostclub . com]  
>To: Fujioka Haruhi [haruhi_tanuki (a) ouranhostclub . com]<br>Subject: We miss you!  
>Date: Fri, 12 Nov 2010<p>

Haruhi-kuuun!

It's us, Kurakano and Sakurazuka! We are now having croissants and coffee in the host club with Hikaru-kun and Kaoru-kun, and everyone decided to send you an email to tell you that we're thinking of you! We're very sad about being unable to spend time with Haruhi-kun like we did last year.

For the destination of our sophomore school trip, Class 2-A, Bossa Nova-kun and all of your second year friends are going to vote for America so that you can join up with us! Nobody wants to leave Haruhi-kun out of such an important event. Hikaru-kun and Kaoru-kun say that they will keep you updated – we can't wait to see you again, Haruhi-kun!

Haruhi, this is Kaoru. They've _finally_ returned my laptop to me. Hikaru just took it without permission to show the customers some of the photographs you took! Next time, I am going to take a leaf out of Kyouya-senpai's book and give them the evil eye to protect my poor laptop.

Oh, so you got those cute highlights because you were dragged to the salon by your host family? You say that the mother in your host family behaves a lot like mine? Do I know that family or something? If they are a prominent family like you said, I might know them. Anyway, no one is as cool as my mum.

And hey, that's insulting okay – Hikaru and I don't spend our time doing lewd photomanips! That one time was because Tono asked us to do the website and Kyouya-senpai asked us to brainstorm for new ideas, and who are we to say no to them?

Mori-senpai told me that he's already called you about Ootori Pharmaceuticals, so I won't rehash the story. Anyway, that's just the tip of the iceberg. I think Tono will definitely be truthful with you if you ask him about his motives. We tried, and he's very happy-go-lucky and confident about it, though he just keeps rambling on about himself and Kyouya-senpai and how great a team they'll make. Everyone is getting really worried. We can't figure out what he's thinking. Haruhi, please do your best!

I don't know if I should really be telling you this, but the whole club knows about it so I think you should too – Ootori-sama is in the process of finding a fiancée for Kyouya-senpai. We should have expected something like this happening to one of us; still, we really don't like it.

Kyouya-senpai doesn't seem to care one way or the other. Tomorrow, when Ootori-sama and Fuyumi-san come home, the both of us and Tono are going to kidnap Kyouya-senpai and bring him along for lunch with Ranka-papa.

We'll make sure that Ranka-papa is eating and sleeping well, Haruhi! Focus on your studies and get the top ranking in your class there! Our Haruhi is unbeatable!

Love, Kaoru

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* * *

><p>.<p>

"Ranka-san!" they chorus when the door opens.

"Ohhh! All of you are here!" Ranka yips, pirouetting effeminately in extreme delight. "Kyouya-kun, long time no see! Have you been terribly busy? I miss the chats we used to have!"

"I've been very well, Ranka-san. We're more concerned for you," Kyouya replies gallantly. "I trust Kaoru has been contacting you diligently?"

"Yes, yes, Kaoru-kun has been absolutely wonderful," Ranka praises. "Your choices are perfect as always, Kyouya-kun."

"Here, Papa-san," Kaoru cuts in sweetly, handing an elegant box to Ranka. "We've brought some _baumkuchen_ for you."

Utterly bewitched, Ranka gushes at Kaoru and Kyouya as the six of them file into the teeny peasant apartment.

"Sheesh, Kaoru," Hikaru says, sotto voce. "Suck up."

Kaoru bats his eyelids at his twin angelically, and narrowly ducks as Hikaru takes a swipe at him.

"Oooooh!" Misuzu sweeps towards them in a shower of sparkles. "Lunch will be ready in a moment, you handsome boys."

"Misuzu-chi has prepared a special menu for special guests," Ranka informs them.

"Father-in-law!" Tamaki exclaims with extraordinary gravitas as he bows deeply. "Thank you for inviting us! You work so hard to support this family! Your generosity is without compare!"

Ranka sighs melodramatically. "Without my darling daughter, this house has gotten quite dusty and dirty. That's why there are so many pests. Can you hear them, Kyouya-kun? They're so loud and disgusting; they really get in the way."

Tamaki goes sheet white with anguish and he teleports to a corner to cultivate his mini collection of fungi as his best friend plasters on a closed-eye smile at his misfortune.

"Tono," Hikaru and Kaoru say simultaneously, encircling Tamaki with identical glints of mischief in their eye. "Did you know that when parents don't give their blessings, only 1 in 10,000,000 marriages succeed?"

Tamaki jumps up at once, horrified beyond all measure. "What?! You lying twins! Don't make up statistics!"

They cackle wickedly and dance away from his frenzied attempts to capture them.

"Okaasan! Do something!"

"Stop adding to his misery," Kyouya says impassively.

By unspoken consent, they bring their antics to an end.

"What was that?! Why do you only listen to Okaasan?!" Tamaki shrieks, re-kicking up a fuss.

Kaoru and Hikaru make a big show of ignoring him for half a minute, until finally Hikaru leans into Kyouya and drawls, "Kyouya-senpai, now we're miserable."

As one, Kyouya, Hikaru and Kaoru turn to Tamaki and shoot him their most unimpressed look.

Distraught, Tamaki dissolves into a puddle of organic ooze as Honey claps excitedly at the trays of food that Misuzu is carrying into the room.

"There you go, Mitsukuni-kun."

"Waaah! Amazing, Misuzu-chi!" Honey compliments, his eyes glassy and bright. His plate is stacked with sweet crêpes that are crammed full with strawberries, peaches, cream and ice cream, and liberally drizzled with chocolate and caramel sauces.

The rest of them are having savoury _galettes_ that look and smell magnificent. They gather around and tuck in as soon as everyone is seated.

Well, almost everyone.

"Tamaki, you're staining the tatami," Kyouya rebukes him blandly halfway through his gossip session with Ranka.

Tears dripping copiously from his eyes, Tamaki coalesces back into one piece and picks up his knife and fork, sniffling pathetically at being brushed aside.

Taking pity on him, Mori deposits the little dish of butter in front of Tamaki and ruffles his hair, a fond smile threatening to make an appearance.

"Mori-senpai!" Tamaki cries gratefully, flinging himself at Mori and succeeding in overturning the jug of freshly squeezed cranberry-and-grape juice.

"… Ah."

Misuzu leaps up and runs to the kitchen to fetch napkins and wipes; Tamaki explodes in horror and grovelling apologies; Ranka, Honey and Hikaru join in the fray because they are that sort of people; all five of them are gesticulating wildly and talking over each other at a decibel level typically associated with jet engines.

Kaoru is watching the train wreck with an ever-widening grin when, out of the corner of his eye, he sees Kyouya massaging his temples wearily. Buried underneath the image of exasperation that Kyouya is projecting, Kaoru can sense a bone-deep tiredness brought about by severe lack of sleep.

_Hikaru, tone it down!_ He snaps urgently. _Don't forget our objective for today!_

Although Kaoru is absolutely certain that he had used their Twins' Mental Link to dispatch his message, he could have sworn that Honey and Mori somehow heard it as well – Hikaru and Honey shush themselves as surreptitiously as they can manage, and Mori clasps Tamaki's arm soothingly.

At the application of pressure on his bicep, Tamaki instinctively looks to Kyouya and also goes suspiciously mute. Misuzu and Ranka stop their fussing to regard them strangely; Kaoru has returned his attention back to the food like Honey and Hikaru, all three of them eagerly shoving bits of fried flour batter into their mouths.

Nonchalant as can be.

"Ranka-san," Mori requests, indicating the front of his and Tamaki's juice-drenched shirts.

"Oh! Yes. Follow me!" Ranka chirps, leaving the room with those two. "If we can't find anything that fits you, Takashi-kun, I can wash and dry your shirt very quickly. I hope you don't mind, ne?"

Kaoru is almost as adept at reading Honey's cues as he is at reading Hikaru's by now – at Honey's prompt, Kaoru draws both his twin and his cake-loving senior into himself, using his connections to them as a bridge to weave an elaborate dance of a conversation that fills the air with gaiety and normalcy.

They haven't a chance of concealing their 'Grand Plan of Distraction' from Kyouya, though they can all pretend. Much as Kaoru hates to admit it, it's in their blood to put up social façades when things go wrong, because they know the cardinal rule to never air their dirty laundry in public.

Misuzu is easily pushed along by the tides. They're talking about Mei, about how she's faring at school, about her latest attempts at fashion…

Mid-way into the charade, Kaoru discovers that he wants badly to stop it.

At the back of his mind, he is aware that nothing is truly "wrong" at the moment – how can they already be degenerating into this type of _dishonesty_ with each other? If only Haruhi could be here to smack some sense into them.

He is considering the ways in which he can bring this to an end without compromising their Grand Plan when cool, slender fingers wrap around his right wrist discreetly, taking the decision out of his hands.

Kyouya speaks, volunteering his expert opinion to Misuzu about the finances required to upgrade the facilities of the pension, and –

Kaoru hears nothing of what is said aloud, only what is conveyed quietly: _you're overreacting, silly._

There it is: the open acknowledgement of what is currently happening in a house that Kaoru has come to associate with safety and affection, and the cavalier sweeping aside of these niggling matters in favour of their friendship.

_It will be all right._

This person – this one person who never lowers himself to offering or believing in empty platitudes about the uncertain future – is assuring him for no other reason than that he is worried, and Kaoru's breath staggers to a halt.

Honey picks up the thread of conversation, chattering away even as his smile takes on the shine of sincerity and relief. The change is minute and heartfelt; Hikaru catches it and understands that they can drop the act, since Kyouya isn't going to be offended that they've made today entirely about shielding and supporting him.

Clearing his throat and rising to his feet, Kyouya announces that he will check to see that Ranka hasn't seized the opportunity to remove Tamaki from the ranks of the living. Misuzu chuckles sadly, lamenting the cruel fates for producing one so physically flawless but so mentally flawed – he then gathers up the sopping cloths and flounces off to the kitchen.

Kaoru is bewildered to find that he is standing as well, though he can't remember doing so nor does he have a reason for it. Kyouya blinks at him, and Kaoru spins a tale of intending to assist Misuzu in making a new jug of juice. He (calmly) flees when it dawns on him that he had pulled himself along with the flow of movement, unconsciously trailing after his senior's withdrawn hand.

"Takashi-kun, could you please bring that box over here?" Misuzu is trilling melodiously just as Kaoru approaches them.

Mori is shirtless and leaning against the counter, wielding a hair dryer and targeting its nozzle at the wettest splotches in the crumpled heap of fabric in his fist. At Misuzu's asking, he goes to lift the box of grapefruits, oranges and assorted fruit – it doesn't escape Kaoru's notice that Misuzu's eyes light up slightly at Mori's muscled form – a purely visceral reaction that's completely understandable.

Kaoru knows that, as always, Misuzu and Ranka will turn away, collecting themselves with a dignity that most would think is beyond their capabilities, but in truth it is a dignity that defines the both of them and the life choices they've made.

Sure enough, Misuzu fixes his gaze on the apples that he is slicing, his straight back saying all that needs to be said about his principles. Unless the host club members are deliberately putting on a show like they did in Karuizawa, Misuzu – and Ranka too – will not ogle.

That realisation had marked the point where Ranka stopped being Kaoru's friend's father to become Kaoru's friend.

Making no mention of it so as to spare Mori the inevitable embarrassment and subsequent self-consciousness, Kaoru places himself in charge of the juicer, feeding pieces of fruit through the machine per Misuzu's directions. He keeps one eye trained on his senior, who clearly hasn't the faintest clue how to dry clothing properly.

There must be something _wrong_ with him, he thinks, that though he relies on Mori and Kyouya, he enjoys seeing them be something less than totally self-sufficient.

Finally, when he must either suffocate from holding in his laughter or do something about Mori's abysmal handling of his shirt, he washes his hands, sneaks into Haruhi's room to retrieve a clothes hanger, and tugs the clothing free from Mori's grip.

"You can juice the fruits, senpai," Kaoru suggests diplomatically.

That is… definitely a wry quirk of the lips.

With a few deft moves, Kaoru gets to work on the shirt, section by section and stretching it taut to minimise wrinkles.

The outburst of sound in the living room indicates that Tamaki and Ranka must have rejoined the rest – Misuzu takes hold of the newly-filled jug and heads out.

"Takashi-kun, if you could just grab some cups? This juice is a different flavour from the one earlier. There're some clean ones in the second shelf from your right. Don't bother with washing those that you and Tamaki-kun used."

Mori reaches up and opens the cabinet; there aren't any cups left. Kaoru is about to tell Mori to try the bottommost drawer when Mori does so on his own accord, fishing several of them out.

How odd.

"It's dry enough to be ironed now, senpai," Kaoru remarks breezily. "I'll ask Ranka-papa where the iron is."

He watches as Mori moves to where he knows the board and iron are usually kept.

"Been visiting Ranka-san also, senpai?" he asks while Mori sets up.

"Nn," Mori confesses.

Kaoru finishes up swiftly, handing the shirt back to Mori in a pristine condition and is rewarded with a smile.

"Haruhi did everything in the house," Mori says by way of explanation after he is fully dressed. Kaoru nods in appreciation of Ranka's difficulty in adjusting and of his senior's thoughtfulness; he is surprised by neither yet immensely moved by both.

"Mori-senpai!" Tamaki starts as soon as they come into view. "I – "

He is cut off when Hikaru lobs a strawberry at him, much to Honey's intense displeasure.

"Let it go _already_, Tono," Hikaru complains as he cowers behind Kyouya to deflect the demonic energy of AB wrath. "Seriously, we've known you long enough to expect this sort of thing from you. Did you know that Kyouya-senpai brings along an extra outfit to change into whenever you're around?"

At Kyouya's raised eyebrows, Kaoru's shoulders hunch over in an abashed wince. It wouldn't be difficult for his senior to pinpoint the culprit who had revealed this titbit to Hikaru. In good conscience, Kaoru could not have kept such a simple and radical solution to himself – it is a mere stroke of fortune that the twins had not formed part of the collateral damage from the splattered juice.

Tamaki makes an indignant and hurt sound. "Kyouya!"

"We expect it, Tama-chan, yet we continue to ask you to come along," Honey reminds him kindly.

"Mm," Mori concurs.

Overcome, Tamaki sprawls on the ground next to their seniors, laying his head in Honey's lap and sobbing out his happiness.

"Not really," Hikaru contradicts. "A lot of the time he invites himself."

Kaoru pokes at his twin through their bond, mildly taken aback at the comment.

"Poor Tama-chan," Honey coos, stroking the blond hair softly. "Hika-chan is such a bully."

Hikaru's jaw drops in disbelief.

_It was _one_ strawberry. One!_

Kaoru bows his head hastily so that his twin will not catch sight of his expression.

"Hika-chan likes things that come in twos," Honey murmurs to Tamaki, a reproachful undertone directed towards Hikaru. "That is why he doesn't think much of a single strawberry or a single Tama-chan."

In the wake of Honey's baffling logic, there descended a silence that – in Kaoru's experience – often heralds the storm.

"Itadakimasu!" he shouts, pre-empting the outbreak of war.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Owing to the numerous disruptions and the multiple courses, it is late afternoon when Kaoru reclines against the wall with a full and satisfied belly. Misuzu, ever the consummate housekeeper, is in the midst of clearing the table of the remains of their lunch; Kaoru is considering whether to lend a hand – it's what Haruhi would do – but at the moment he feels like a lazy, fat cat.

Confronted by the irresistible desire to curl up on the floor, he seeks out his usual pillow only to catch a glimpse of said pillow engaged in a hearty Ferrari versus Lamborghini debate with Honey at the other end of the room. Tamaki is with them, unable to prevent himself from chipping in about the essential criteria of elegance and style. Kaoru has to marvel at how unquestionably learned and scholarly Hikaru comes across whenever he embarks on any topic that involves technical specs and mechanical knowledge. When combined with the renowned Hitachiin passion and verve, it infuses Hikaru with a certain je ne sais quoi that is disturbingly and undeniably sexy, like a man who knows what he's about and isn't afraid to show it or use it.

All of that doesn't change the fact that it'll take too much effort to get to where Hikaru is.

A quick scan of the occupants has Kaoru zeroing in on Kyouya, who is responding to Mori's carefully nonintrusive probing as to his welfare.

Knowing that his senior is markedly more touch-sensitive in public, Kaoru edges towards him and sits just behind, letting his leg come into tentative contact with Kyouya rather than just collapsing all over him as he would have done to Hikaru. Kyouya pays him no heed, which equates to giving permission, so Kaoru turns himself around – back-to-back – and allows his body to submerge into Kyouya's spine.

He eavesdrops shamelessly on his seniors' tête-à-tête – Kyouya's words are precisely imprecise, calculated to equivocate and prevaricate. This sort of behaviour amongst friends traditionally brings a frown to Mori's brow, except that familiarity has bred understanding and tolerance. In Mori's silence, Kaoru senses that he is reading between the lines, making plenty of concessions to both Kyouya and Tamaki like the awesome, devoted senpai that he is.

Kaoru is almost asleep when a discordant sound cuts through the droning consistency of their chatter. Ranka snatches up the phone and greets the caller exuberantly, dashing into the kitchen to find Misuzu – the caller must be a mutual friend, he surmises, and he starts a little when a hand reaches over to cup his cheek lightly.

"Yes, Kyouya-senpai?" he smiles.

"We'll be reducing the number of meetings per week, Kaoru. I anticipate that there will be some weeks whereby it will not be practicable to have a meeting at all."

Kaoru freezes up awkwardly; he wants to squawk "what, why?!" at Kyouya, but really he knows what and he knows why and he isn't stupid.

"I expected that, senpai," he says, because he had.

In a matter of seconds, it becomes apparent that it's not going to be possible for him to return to his previous state of ease. Both reluctant and grateful to get away from Kyouya, he pulls himself to his feet, determined to help Misuzu with whatever tasks yet to be done.

"Kaoru. I'll still be running the club with you."

Kaoru turns, puzzled, wondering why Kyouya felt the need to say that. Of course the power rests in Kyouya's hands still, is that what he's reminding Kaoru of? He nods with as much composure as he can muster and leaves before Kyouya can call him back again.

"Misu – "

His hands soapy with dishwashing liquid, Misuzu stands by the sink in tears as Ranka frantically scribbles down information that sounds ominously like directions to a hospital ward. Alarmed, Kaoru marches forward and grasps Misuzu's arm.

"What happened? Is Haruhi all right? Is it Mei-chan?" he demands, mind jumping to the worst conclusions.

"No, no, nothing of the sort," Ranka answers as he hangs up, seeing that Misuzu is in too much of a tizzy to have registered the question at all. "A friend of ours has been hospitalised."

Misuzu's reaction – that glazed look in the eyes, the shell-shocked expression – gives Kaoru the distinct impression that the hospitalised person must be quite a 'friend' indeed; out of common decency, however, he keeps his mouth shut and schools his face.

"Kaoru-kun, we're going to the hospital now," Ranka tells him in an uncharacteristically quiet voice while rinsing Misuzu's hands for him. In an apologetic tone, he continues, "Could you…?"

"Sure, Papa-san," Kaoru replies instantly, knowing that Ranka doesn't want to chase them out of his house though he will need someone to lock up after everyone leaves. He wanders over to the scrap of paper on the benchtop and glances at it.

"Oh? Papa-san, do you want me to call Kyouya-senpai?" Kaoru asks. In an Ootori hospital, an Ootori's word is law. "Senpai could – "

"No," Ranka refuses quickly. "It's all right, Kaoru-kun. No need to disturb him."

Kaoru notes that Ranka is blocking Misuzu from view, and that all of his actions are abnormally subdued, as though he's trying to avoid catching the attention of those in the living room. His staunch loyalty to his friends carries unmistakeable echoes of Haruhi, but even without that poignant reminder, Kaoru would have made this offer anyway: "Take our car, Papa-san. You'll get there faster. Ask the driver to wait for you so that you can come home in the car, too."

For courtesy's sake, he knows that Ranka will argue the point, so he heads him off by assuring him that he and Hikaru can easily hitch a ride with one of the seniors, all of whom would be more than willing to send them home. To increase his persuasive power, he waves his hand meaningfully at Misuzu and watches as Ranka's resistance crumbles in the face of his friend's need.

The battle thus won, Kaoru nimbly pulls on the string of Misuzu's apron, tugs it away, and steers the both of them to the front door.

"Go! I'll take care of things here," he promises as they vanish into the dim light of dusk.

The shoji door separating the kitchen from the living room slides open, and Mori comes into sight just as Kaoru is donning the apron. His senior stares at him levelly, a question in his eyes even though Kaoru has already shut the front door. He goggles at Mori's prescience before realising the method through which Mori had become aware that Ranka and Misuzu had left the house – a shadow flickers across the translucent washi screen, getting larger and larger until it reveals Kyouya, similarly inquiring.

Of course. The two people who are always watching.

"Something personal cropped up. Urgent," Kaoru explains vaguely, moving to the sink to finish up the tasks. He has no doubt whatsoever that they'll find out soon enough anyway.

Kyouya's name rips through the house in a sonic boom, and he returns to the uproarious crowd without pressing for more details. Kaoru shoos Mori away too when he moves to help; all that is left of the clean-up are five cups and a jug to wash, and that's a task that certainly doesn't require two people.

So it is that Kaoru finds himself the lone audience of a shadow puppet theatre, entranced by the charcoal-coloured silhouettes and uninhibited sounds of the people most beloved to him – five years from now, will they still need each other? Will they still want each other? Will they still deign to meet up in an insignificant commoner apartment, perhaps with their spouses in tow?

Try as he might, Kaoru cannot envision any of them with a partner, though his mind goes into overdrive in its attempt to implant images of eligible bachelorettes and beautiful models he knows. Unable to accept his artist's imagination failing him, he props his lower back against the sink and closes his eyes – how would a life with_ this_ family look like?

Those five will be exactly as they are now, boisterous and energetic, and

Haruhi will be right beside him, wrapping up the leftover food that she will insist on keeping – food that she will have cooked for them earlier – then, she will come to stand on his left as he passes her the clean plates and cups, he will be washing them as though it's a daily routine, she will be wiping them dry –

It is utterly incomprehensible to him,

that he doesn't seem to mind doing domestic chores with Haruhi

that he feels free from fear

that he has forgotten how loneliness feels like

that he is _known_, fully and completely and unapologetically

And arms will encircle his waist from behind, a cold nose will press into his neck; he will melt into the body, will turn his head around to give Hikaru a kiss –

Kaoru's eyes fly open, he has shocked himself, because his cheek had bumped against the edge of spectacle frames, and a silky voice had said, "My company will be listed tomorrow, shall we celebrate? If we have dinner outside, we'll be less tired when we return home…"

The sliding door rattles and Kaoru springs into action, whirling around so quickly that he hadn't managed to catch a glimpse of the intruder. The tap is turned on quickly, the gushing water reflecting the speed of his thoughts, and Kaoru concentrates very hard on appearing busy though his fingers feel nerveless. In his mind there lingers a smouldering look and a cunning grin, neither of which can be categorised as _friendly_ whether by a loose application of the word or by any stretch of the imagination.

"Oh, Kaoru!" Tamaki yaps. "Have we cruelly abandoned you to shoulder the burdens of the commoner lifestyle alone?"

Kaoru's heart is thumping too fast for him to speak. He cannot even meet Tamaki's gaze, ashamed at the way he's been thinking of his girlfriend in a domestic setting with himself, disrespecting the choice those two have made to be with each other exclusively.

It is unsurprising, then, that his reactions are misinterpreted.

"We didn't mean to," Tamaki wails, remorseful and disconsolate. "Here, I'll help!"

Enthusiastically pulling up his sleeves and butting Kaoru aside, Tamaki grabs a sponge and squeezes a large dollop of dishwashing liquid into it.

"This is good practice for me, you know! Just ask me for help next time, Kaoru! Shima is teaching me how to do some of the household chores so that when Haruhi and I finally marry, we can do them together, building and maintaining our home with the power of our love!"

Kaoru is at a loss for a reply, his breath wedged uncomfortably in his throat.

Tamaki carries on, stars in his eyes, "Haruhi and I, making dinner… I'll steal food and she'll smack my hand or tell me off. We'll stand in the kitchen, side-by-side, like those couples from the drama serials… I'll wash the dishes and Haruhi will dry them, we'll nudge each other and share secret smiles…"

At Tamaki's ingenuous wishes, a wave of nausea threatens in the horizon; Kaoru is feeling the beginnings of disgust at _himself_, and it is a mark of how they've always treated Tamaki that he immediately assumes that the nausea is directed at him.

"Don't give me that face, Kaoru! Scepticism is an enemy of love!" he admonishes. "Love will creep up on you from behind and be careful that you don't mistake it for something else! That is why we are here to help you recognise it, like you and Hikaru helped me to recognise my true feelings for Haruhi! Then you won't be able to stop talking about your special person, but I promise I'll listen to it all when the day comes."

He glows earnestly at Kaoru.

"Really, Kaoru, I will."

Kaoru returns with a twisted smile, for that day had come and gone without Tamaki ever realising it.

"Yeah, okay, Tono," he says agreeably, unwilling to open that can of worms and wanting Tamaki to shut up about the topic of romance. "Don't forget those five cups."

The jug is handed to him; he acts as a stand-in for the role of Haruhi in Tamaki's dishwashing fantasy. Tamaki is humming the theme music of the taiga drama (that is nearing its epic conclusion, a fact that he incessantly reminds them of) in a lovesick daze, and Kaoru feels annoyed.

He knows what Tamaki had been up to.

Leading up to Haruhi's departure and the days after, seeing neither hide nor hair of him. He'd been working himself to the bone trying to chase after Haruhi, to arrange an exchange program for himself to attend the same school that she does, and attempting to convince the powers-that-be that he should be allowed to go with her.

Mighty is love indeed, that it is Tamaki's whole world. There isn't space for anything else. He did all this without informing a soul despite the inevitable failure of the host club if the king abdicates.

Odd, that Kaoru had fortified himself for Hikaru's change of priorities should Haruhi have selected him, yet had not accounted for the possibility that Tamaki would do exactly this – elevating Haruhi to the number one spot and disregarding everyone else.

It is especially galling now that Kaoru understands that all of them need Tamaki more than Tamaki needs them. With the exception of Haruhi, who needs Tamaki because she loves him, the rest of them love Tamaki because they need him.

Kaoru remembers Hacker-san's eyes, and wonders that he could have been so vulnerable at a time when he'd thought he was the very opposite. He wonders that Tamaki, having seen that in them, had been prepared to leave them at the drop of a hat, like a bored teenager giving up a hobby that he no longer cares for.

It's unfair to Tamaki to make him take on responsibility for them, he knows; after all, Tamaki has always been better at starting things than finishing them. Besides, it's not as though he's in a position to criticise Tamaki for not seeing things through to their bitter end – he feels keenly the thoughtlessness he had shown Kyouya previously.

To be _that_ devastated at Tamaki's plans, he'd made less progress than he thought he had. His decreased dependence on Hikaru had really been a case of transferral to the other club members. Should any of them leave, Kaoru thinks he wants to feel sad rather than abandoned, accepting rather than floundering. When life serves up its real challenges, games – inherently pointless by definition – should be set aside.

Kaoru wants to become his own finisher, like Kyouya, Haruhi, oneechan…

Once more the shoji door is open and shut, thankfully rescuing Kaoru from his depressing reverie.

"Ka-o-ru, what are you doing hiding in here? Has that idiot been harassing you?"

Tamaki bristles. "How rude! I was just chatting with Kaoru!"

"Yeah, I want him back," Hikaru says possessively. "You can stay here by yourself, Tono."

"Wha – Doing household chores alone is lonely!" Tamaki screeches. "That's why I came to accompany Kaoru!"

"Your company is worse than no company, Tono." The tone is joking but the underlying emotion is too real for the banter to be harmless.

The comment bends Tamaki out of shape. "That's mean! That's really unkind, Hikaru!"

Hikaru's mouth is already open – prepared to deliver some smart ass comeback, no doubt – when Kaoru grabs onto his other half, wary of that spike of something bitingly corrosive within Hikaru, the likes of which has not surfaced in a long while.

He pours himself into his brother and surrounds him with a presence that is both warning and soothing. _Hikaru, whatever it is, we'll solve it when we get home._

As a matter of course, Hikaru cedes to him with a glum look.

Tamaki frowns at the lack of forthcoming answers. "Are you two angry at me or something…? It seems like we haven't talked in forever," he tells them with a tremulous smile.

"No," Hikaru says with a concealed sullenness that is only noticeable if one had been looking for it.

"Tono, you're taking way too long for a simple chore like this," Kaoru interjects, hoping that he will snap to the task. "It's just fun to see you cluck and flap around like a chicken. Don't worry, we got what we wanted from that incident with Mori-senpai." He shoves two cups into Tamaki's hands. "Faster! Practice makes perfect!"

He pokes at Hikaru through their bond, pushing him to the safety of the living room.

His twin turns to obey.

"Stay and talk with us!" Tamaki asks disobediently, and Kaoru swallows a groan. "You go to Mori-senpai's house everyday; I don't see you anymore, Hikaru! Kyouya says that you even practise in the dojo during lunchtimes! So disciplined! Martial arts is such a – "

"Really, Tono, focus!" Kaoru says rather waspishly. "These are important things for you to learn!"

"I'm doing it properly, Kaoru! The cups are clean!"

"They are _not_ clean! Look at this, this spot here!"

"That spot was always there!"

"It will stop being there if you use the sponge to scrub it! That is the purpose of dishwashing!"

"I scrubbed it! That was so condescending!" Tamaki howls, driven to tears.

Instantly feeling a stab of guilt for pushing so far, Kaoru snags a tissue and wipes Tamaki's face for him. "Okay, okay, Tono, stop crying! Just try your best! At most I'll wash them again."

He pats Tamaki on the head, forgetting why he'd wanted him to remain distracted. Tamaki whimpers in that adorable puppy-dog manner of his and turns back to the sink, crestfallen.

"Kaoru," he says softly, audibly.

"Yeah?" Kaoru responds without thinking.

"Why don't you want Hikaru to talk to me?"

Kaoru experiences a truly terrific urge to strangle him.

"How do you live under the weight of that ego, Tono? Not everything is about you," Hikaru wraps an arm around Kaoru and guides him away, saving him from his speechlessness.

As soon as Tamaki had taken up that line of questioning it had been a lost cause, but they'd been two steps away from freedom. Two paltry steps.

"Is it because… Is this about Haruhi? Are – are you still jealous?"

Kaoru feels the explosion a split second before it actually happens.

"Jealous!? _Jealous?!_" Hikaru erupts, his body wound so tightly that he is shaking visibly. "I sincerely wish you well! _We _sincerely want the best for you and Haruhi! We follow you on your dates to make sure _you_ don't screw up, and we save your ass when you act like a nitwit! We," he inhales agitatedly, "have put as much effort into _your_ relationship as you have! You're the one who doesn't cherish what you've got! You think long-distance relationships are fun?!"

Kaoru has just figured out what is going on, and oh,_ shit_.

"That's not – !"

"Aren't you the diehard romantic?! You're the chairman's son! It doesn't matter if you enrol late for university!"

"It's not uni – !"

Hikaru and Tamaki are loud enough to wake the dead, why aren't those three seniors intervening?!

"Business?! Newsflash: it's easy to fly to Europe from America! And if you'd really wanted to go with her, just don't suggest this type of troublesome project in the first place and save Kyouya-senpai the hassle!"

_Hikaru, no. He did – _

"I did!" Tamaki chafes. "I wanted to – I did think about following Haruhi!"

"Well then," Hikaru roars, "_why didn't you?!_"

Absolute, ringing silence.

Tamaki's violet eyes are wide and distressed; they dart to the right in what appears to be a nervous tic – Kaoru gets it at once, and spares a prayer that Hikaru doesn't –

"Kyouya-senpai?" Hikaru breathes.

_Sigh._

"You stayed for _Kyouya-senpai_?! What the _hell_. Who is it you actually want to marry, Haruhi or Kyouya-senpai?!"

"Don't – That's not what it's about! I have plans to meet with Haruhi!" Tamaki splutters. "Haruhi can handle herself!"

"And Kyouya-senpai can't?" Hikaru sneers.

"He can! But we can't!" Tamaki yells, breathing heavily.

That it has come to this… it takes all of Kaoru's willpower not to smack his own head against the nearest wall.

Tamaki lowers his voice, pained. "Hikaru, we made Kyouya do everything. But he's busy now, there's something that he has to do. I can help him there, and Kaoru can help him here, and the club will survive. We can give Haruhi a club to come back to."

Kaoru has heard enough.

He strides past Tamaki to the front door, wrenches it open and leaves without looking back, furious at everyone. Tamaki, for not telling them so many things; those three seniors, for not stepping in; Hikaru, for the way he's been stewing away…

Mostly, though, Kaoru is angry at himself.

When he reaches the foot of the stairs of the apartment block, he stops short at the empty parking lot where their car should have been.

Kaoru has never felt despair on this scale.

He turns his face to the darkening sky, heedless of the commoners hurrying home at peak hour.

Footsteps clump down the stairs towards him, followed by an identical hand slipping into his and twining their fingers together.

_I offered our car to – _

Insistent tugging from his twin.

Kaoru trails along, pulled in the direction of Mori's car.

"Get in," Hikaru instructs, holding the door open.

_Um, Hikaru – _

Dumbfounded, he watches as Mori's chauffeur recovers from the shock and – incredibly – gets behind the wheel. Ditching his reservations, he slides in and scrambles to the far side to give Hikaru space.

"Drive," Hikaru barks.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

They are in their room, and neither has released the other twin's white-knuckled hand for hours.

Hikaru is still framed in the dangerous poise he'd upheld throughout the deathly car ride home.

"Hikaru, my thinking is the same as Tono's," Kaoru confides fearfully.

This is the way that Hikaru loses. He's always considered himself a worthy opponent; he doesn't always play fairly but he loses fairly, and if somebody actually manages to beat him, he would like that person to appreciate the victory.

Knowing this, Kaoru cannot excuse himself for his complacency. He'd been so arrogant in assuming that Hikaru's opinion will never be the polar opposite of his on any given matter, and of course Tamaki – Kyouya's _best friend in the entire universe_ – will have noticed that the Ootoris are drawing ever closer to the point of no return.

Hikaru flashes him a lopsided grin. "I figured. Sometime when you went from accusation to guilt then getting that crazy thought that you should hug Tono."

Kaoru grins back sheepishly. "And, I've been kind of annoyed at Tono because I thought he was thinking like you."

"Uh huh. Guilt. Got that the first time."

"But, Hikaru, you've misunderstood him too!" Kaoru says worriedly. "He really was all set to go with Haruhi."

"How do you know that?" Hikaru asks curiously.

"Parent Liaison Officer. The Chairman enjoys talking about Tono to anyone who'd listen. I waited for Tono to tell us personally and he never did. For a while I thought he was going to go over to Boston secretly, and I got ready to arrange for all of us to go too."

"Oh man, I'm getting Demon Lord vibes from you, Kaoru."

He gives his brother a good kick in the shin.

"I don't think the club would last long without Tono," he admits. "If there's no Haruhi and no Tono, we're dead, Hikaru."

Hikaru makes a grumpy noise at the back of his throat. "We have Kyouya-senpai still."

"I don't know that Kyouya-senpai really trusts himself with anyone but Tono," he divulges, feeling a acute sense of personal failure.

An insightful expression crawls across his twin's face, tainted by the hint of a taunting smile. "You _actually_ really want him to like you," Hikaru observes.

"Well, yeah." The confirmation is extracted with some reluctance. "He's brilliant. There's a lot more to him that people don't know. He pretends he doesn't particularly care about being known, mainly because he views it as an exploitable weakness, but he's so attached to Tono for instinctively understanding him. I think he thinks that if he manages to have even one true friend, just the one, then that'll be enough. So, he's convinced himself that anyone else would be superfluous, and he's closed himself off."

Hikaru stares at him with bulging frog eyes, then blows an impatient raspberry. "Ka-o-ruuu, quit letting your thoughts go down funny paths."

"It's not an invalid analysis, Hikaru!" he insists, flopping onto his bed and shutting his eyes. "We've been there, done that, remember? All this while we've been trying to grow beyond the limits we previously drew for ourselves, but Kyouya-senpai remains stagnant at Tono. Okay, yeah, I know our case was extreme, but… there are moments where I think that Kyouya-senpai's no better."

The bed dips under the weight of knees and elbows, and a shadow blocks out the light.

"So if we accept your premise," Hikaru theorises, sitting back to straddle Kaoru's hips, "losing Tono means losing Kyouya-senpai as well?"

He nods.

"That's not what Mori-senpai thinks."

"Really!' Kaoru asks hopefully, wanting to be wrong about this.

"See, I think you're – "

"Huh? You were talking about what Mori-senpai thinks!"

Hikaru huffs crabbily, making to roll off of his twin. "That's nice of you, Kaoru."

"Oh, don't." Kaoru clamps his twin's thighs to keep him in place and gazes up at him sorrowfully. "Sorry. I didn't mean for it to sound that way. Go on."

"What _I_ think," Hikaru emphasises exaggeratedly, and Kaoru rolls his eyes, "is this: I think you're putting way too much pressure on yourself because you care too much about how everything will turn out. I mean, it's good that you care. I know someone has to. Just don't allow yourself to want his approval so much that lukewarm responses are like the end of the world to you."

He raises a hand, forestalling the protests that have already risen to Kaoru's lips.

"I'm going to say something now as the person who knows you best and loves you most, okay? Don't get ticked off," he warns.

Apprehensively, Kaoru scrutinises him for a long moment before indicating his consent.

"I think you're letting insecurity get to you. I see you doing all the operational tasks that you have to do to keep the club running smoothly, and even though you do them really well, I don't think you believe that you can do the job. Kaoru," Hikaru sighs-whispers affectionately, "where the hell is your confidence?"

"It's not that," Kaoru denies, squirming uneasily.

"It _is_ that. Look, Kaoru, I'm not the most attentive brother. I know that, yeah? I don't analyse other people like you do or think about how they're like. I don't care," Hikaru says dismissively. "But," he continues, leaning close enough to kiss, "I will always know you. There won't ever be a day where you act weirdly and I don't notice. I might not know _why_ you're acting weirdly, and I might be slow at catching it sometimes, but I can feel when you're not all there. So, did something happen to make you think that you're not good enough?"

"Not really. Um. I've heard some comments, I guess. Anyway, it's true that Tono has a… a... _transformative_ power of sorts. Have you realised? People rally to him wherever he is. Like that hot spring incident! Everyone wants to be around him, be part of what he's doing. The both of us, Hikaru, feel that things are less fun when Tono isn't involved. I don't know a single person who has been able to resist Tono! Even Grandmother Suou surrendered! Fine, I can operate the club. It just means that I pay attention to its finances and organise the logistics. That's a learned skill. But I don't have the ability to move others deeply. That's a gift."

Unexpectedly, Hikaru tosses his head back and laughs. "I thought so," he says rather smugly. "Kaoru, you're becoming predictable."

Vexed and confused, Kaoru pinches his brother's leg.

"Ow! What the – ! Wait for me to finish explaining, dumbass!" Hikaru rubs at the spot roughly. "What I mean is, it's become a form of jealousy! Because Tono is occupying the position that you want, he's the standard that you use to measure yourself. When you think of yourself in that role of president, you judge yourself in relation to Tono, so you've begun competing with him for everything, even Kyouya-senpai's attention. By the way, no, I don't agree with you and I think you're being an idiot."

Kaoru flings his arm across his eyes, terribly embarrassed.

"_Ohhh_." A fiendishly gleeful snigger. "Bullseye."

Reaching blindly for a pillow with his other hand, Kaoru finds one and plonks his twin on the head.

"Ugghh! Since when have you become so irritatingly perceptive?!"

Gloom settles on Hikaru.

_Oh, right._

"Been there, done that," Hikaru declares, his crooked smile awful to behold. "Well, she chose him in the end. He should be giving his all to her! If she'd chosen me, I would have."

Kaoru fights down a smile, waiting for an apology that he doesn't need but knows will arrive in due time.

Sure enough, horrified eyes search for his. "That's not what I meant! You'll always be important to me! I just – I would've gone with – I mean – "

He doesn't know whether to laugh or to cry at his silly twin. He'd known it even before Hikaru had, it seems.

"I get it," he says magnanimously, sparing Hikaru from further flustered attempts.

"Kaoru, I…" Hikaru goes quiet. He ponders for a minute, then says, "You would have gone with me."

"Yeah, I would've," Kaoru agrees easily, feeling the truth of it in his bones.

Hikaru lies down on him, burying his face in Kaoru's shoulder.

"You're the best, Kaoru."

"I know."

"I'll reward you by telling you what Mori-senpai thinks."

"Please do," Kaoru laughs.

"Mori-senpai remembers that even Tono took a while to get through," his twin murmurs into his ear.

Kaoru smiles despite himself.

"Naaah, it's probably not a good idea for me to keep trying when I know he's busy. I _know_ he values us as friends. I just… At first I was studying Tono and Kyouya-senpai, I read through their club files, I made notes on the qualities they have that benefit the club, and I compared myself to them to find the areas where I'm inadequate so I can work on them, and – and it kind of spiralled out of control."

"Hmm… Mori-senpai probably has something wise to say to that," Hikaru replies ruefully. "Something like how it's impossible to control yourself when you compare – no, how comparison is – ah, it's intrinsically – the uncontrollable character of – feel free to stop me anytime, Kaoru."

There's no putting a lid on the hysterical laughter that had bubbled out halfway through that horrible impersonation. Hikaru, to his credit, laughs along.

"Haa, haha…" Kaoru forces down the remnants of his mirth. "Yeah, I get it. See, the thing is – I know Kyouya-senpai is impossible to match, but when he teaches me I can understand and I put in a lot of effort! When I follow his instructions, I can see myself improving. Tono's impact on other people is… Tono is, Tono _himself_ is something else. He has that – that X-factor that I don't know I can imitate. Of course I wonder about how I can fill the gaping hole that Tono will leave in the club. I mean, Kyouya-senpai knows best about the exact nature of Tono's contribution to the host club's success, right? So it makes sense to get his approval… right?"

No response.

"But!" Kaoru hurries to say, "But, I don't want to replace Tono. Ha! I don't know if he is replaceable in the first place! That guy just does whatever he wants and we have to chase after him! I thought he was neglecting everyone else after Haruhi left, then it looked like he was trying to go after her without even saying a word! If he goes… If he had gone, then Kyouya-senpai… That is, I want to learn how to be at their level. Hikaru, I want us all to stay relevant to each other. I wish that Tono isn't the only person tying Kyouya-senpai to the club."

Still no response.

"No," he clarifies, slightly frustrated with himself, "the club is just a shell. I wish that Tono isn't the only one out of the seven of us that Kyouya-senpai is attached to. Otherwise, we have no way of – I don't know how I can be club president if I don't even have that fundamental ability to keep everyone together."

Hikaru raises his head slowly, incredulity painted across his features.

"Wow, Kaoru. You're a bit stupid, you know?"

"That's nice of you, Hikaru," Kaoru parrots in the tone he had used.

Inexplicably, his twin cracks up like a deranged hyena.

"What?!" he grouses, immediately defensive.

"You can't be serious!" he says, wiping his eyes. "First things first, _no one_ has any complaints about the way you've been doing things. Second – you know as well as I do that we only need to ask to get help from our senpais. _Obviously_ you're going to find it less threatening to take on Kyouya-senpai's role, and that is because you both are quite similar in your methods. In fact, has it occurred to you that maybe Kyouya-senpai _doesn't know_ what makes Tono the person he is? Remember what Dad once said to us? On their seventh anniversary, we asked how someone low-profile like him fell in love with someone like Mum, and he said that sometimes people love other people for being what they can never be. _Finally_ – gaah, I almost can't believe that you can be such a moron, Kaoru – yeah, so Kyouya-senpai was a bit distant from the rest of us as compared to Tono. _Was_. He was looking at you basically the whole of today! You were so focused on not showing him your concerned and worried looks, and he was glancing at you every now and then, not like a 'why is he acting weird' kind of thing, more with a resigned frown, like 'the idiot's worrying himself sick again', then you fell asleep on him and he didn't move an inch even though it looked _so uncomfortable_!"

"Huh. Really."

Hikaru gives him a withering stare. "Don't tell me you haven't noticed that he's been _spending so much time with you_?"

"Yes, _working_! We're totally professional! I don't go to his house to hang out like Tono does."

Disturbingly, Hikaru waggles his eyebrows suggestively. "That's not what Honey-senpai says."

"Wha – ?!" Kaoru exclaims as Hikaru laughs evilly. "What has he been telling you!"

"Nothing you need to burden yourself with, my dear brother," he snickers. "Besides, it's not as if Kyouya-senpai would willingly spend time with you unless he enjoys your company. That is Mori-senpai's opinion. I asked him, I said, 'Kaoru's at Kyouya-senpai's house again', and he said 'aa', so I said, 'yeah. Oh boy', and he said 'mm'.

"… Uhhh. Right, nope, I don't get it."

"Huh? See, if you're at Kyouya-senpai's house, it must mean that he lets you, right? And Mori-senpai says 'aa', which means 'I suspect something' or 'I know something you don't', as distinct from 'ah', to say that he's not bothered because he's used to our behaviour, then I'm thinking, 'yeah, _again_ for like the bazillionth time this week, oh man don't tell me the Demon Lord actually likes Kaoru', and Mori-senpai goes 'mm', which he only uses when he strongly agrees," Hikaru says in one breath.

Kaoru gapes in awe.

He sits up so suddenly that he nearly crashes into his twin's nose. "Hikaru! You speak Mori!"

Hikaru blinks rapidly as realisation sets in, and he gasps too. "I – I do! I do, don't I! Kaoru, I'm amazing!"

They hug each other joyfully, swaying from side to side in their elation.

"You have to teach me!" Kaoru insists.

"I just did! Uhm, okay – there's also 'hmm', senpai's generic answer for most things, which means 'I'm thinking' or 'I've got this' or 'no comment', and 'nnn', meaning 'good, and…?' so he's prompting you to think further. Oh, the worst is 'hnn' because it indicates that senpai is upset, unless it is 'hnn', the cut short version of 'hn-hn-hn', you know, the way senpai laughs. One's gravelly and the other is like an exhale! Anyway you can communicate with Mori-senpai using our mental link. Senpai is like a tuner. When he's bored he flicks through different frequencies and I think he accidentally found ours."

Kaoru takes a moment to absorb the information.

He freaks out.

"Is that what Mori-senpai does whenever he sits there doing nothing?! Shit, Hikaru, he's been listening in?!"

"_I know_," Hikaru grieves. "Honey-senpai advised me not to think too much about it. He says that mostly Mori-senpai thinks about sanma fish and miso soup and natto and doesn't really invade other people's privacy."

"_Sanma fish?!_"

"Yeah!" Hikaru croaks, hoarse with amusement. "I've heard him before! When I was meditating, right, Mori-senpai was thinking about the smell of grilled sanma and wondering if he put enough food in Piyo-chan's pen!"

They scream with laughter.

"Oh – oh my god, Hikaru," he wheezes, "That's why senpai is so tall! Because he's an – "

"Antenna!" Hikaru finishes together with him.

Kaoru rolls over to his side, clutching his tummy.

"Now all we need is someone to master Honey-senpai's Usa-chan alien language!"

"Ehh, Hikaru, I think Usa-chan really is some sort of transmitter!" he discloses. "Sometimes I'm not sure what to do for club or I get stuck on some problem, and somehow I find Usa-chan on top of the document or sketchbook that contains the solution!"

Hikaru looks genuinely frightened before he scoffs and punches Kaoru playfully. "You're just making that up!"

"I'm not!"

A shudder passes through his twin. "Let's not talk about this. The less a person knows about Honey-senpai or Kyouya-senpai, the safer they are."

Kaoru smirks.

"Can we go to sleep now?" Hikaru gets up from the bed and makes his way to the wardrobe to fish out a pair of pyjama bottoms. "I have to wake up early tomorrow."

"On a _Sunday_? Is that normal?"

"It is for Mori-senpai," Hikaru answers cryptically.

"Hikaru," he calls, raising his voice in order that it will travel to the bathroom, "You and I are going to have to apologise to Tono. He's not at fault. It really has nothing to do with him. You were angry at him because you were judging him according to what you would have done, and I was angry at him because I was judging myself using him… Ugh, we are _jerks_."

"I know!" Hikaru hollers back. "That's why we gotta sleep now!"

"Why? Are we going to Tono's house first thing in the morning?"

"No, day after! We'll go before school on Monday!"

"That means we have to get up extra early! Hikaruuu," he whines, "I'm not a morning person, much less a pre-dawn person!"

"And I am?!" Hikaru retorts. "We've been horrible to him! That's our punishment!"

Sighing, Kaoru idly traces circles into their bedspread.

"I miss Haruhi," he mumbles when Hikaru re-enters the room.

"Yeah," Hikaru echoes, voice a little choked. He wriggles under the blankets and pulls them up to his chin, looking as unguarded as he did when they were four and Kaoru had promised to share his ice cream.

"Good night, Kaoru."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Kaoru is struggling not to fall asleep on his breakfast.

True to his word, Hikaru had woken up at the crack of dawn. Kaoru, being the lighter sleeper of the two, had found it impossible to return to sleep in a cold bed.

He gives up at last, wandering into the main living room to find Hikaru sitting cross-legged on the carpet, practising what Kaoru recognises as a series of breathing exercises.

"Wow," he drawls, exceedingly impressed.

Hikaru glares at him irritably. "Mori-senpai says that the room should be free from noise and distractions!"

"Find your inner peace," Kaoru intones. "Inhale and hold your breath for 5 seconds. One, two – ow!"

He rubs the sore spot on his head where Hikaru had chucked a tea light candle holder at him.

"Hikaru, you know I support you in everything. You could have woken up at a decent hour and still do these exercises!"

"True. I wouldn't finish them before Mori-senpai gets here, though."

"Mori-senpai's coming here?" Kaoru questions in surprise. "You invited him?"

"No," Hikaru replies rather edgily. "But he'll turn up."

Kaoru looks at his brother sidelong, and decides to curl up on the chaise with the warm, fluffy throw. He yawns widely. "Carry on."

"I'm done," Hikaru announces after half an hour of dozing. "Do you have to go to the office today?"

"Mm, no," Kaoru says drowsily. "I took leave to spend the weekend with Kyouya-senpai. In case of the fiancée thing."

Hikaru snorts. "Dedicated, aren't you."

It takes more energy than Kaoru is willing to expend to rebut his twin.

Hikaru comes to where he is and crouches before him, running his fingers softly, hesitantly over his closed eyes, his cheek, his lips.

_Ka-o-ru, by working hard to catch up with them, in a way you've already put yourself at their level._

Slowly, Kaoru opens his eyes.

_You know that I love you. Do you know that I respect you?_

Biting his bottom lip, he nods.

_I know what it is you've asked Mother for._

Kaoru tries to smile; he doesn't quite succeed. _When you realised, why didn't you come to talk to me?_

Hikaru pauses for so long that Kaoru begins to fear.

_I was scared._

He rests a reassuring hand on his brother's arm, waiting for more.

_I thought Kyouya-senpai had influenced you so much that you were going to fight me for our inheritance._

"Hikaru!" Kaoru censures, beyond appalled. "How could you think that of me!"

"I know, I know! I panicked, okay? I knew I was being ridiculous even back then. What I did was: I went to Mori-senpai's house and thought about it for one whole day in the meditation room. I've got it sorted out!"

"And?"

_And, you're so brave, Kaoru. I have less self-control than you. Talent can't help me overcome everything. I have something that I have to do first, and Mori-senpai is helping me. I know that the world doesn't wait for anyone, but you… Actually, you're my world and it'll be enough if you wait. You will, won't you?_

The burn of tears is scorching the back of Kaoru's eyes. His breath unsteady, he leans forward to press his forehead against Hikaru's as several droplets spill out.

_Of course. Always, Hikaru._

For how long Kaoru stayed in his brother's arms, he has no idea. They begin to wrestle their way apart only when interrupted by a whiff of an unorthodox perfume and a pair of overly energetic arms smooshing them together.

"Mum!" Kaoru growls semi-coherently, given that his mouth is muffled by his brother's shirt.

"My cute babies!"

"We're seventeen!" Hikaru snaps. "Dad, are you going to stand there while your wife suffocates your children?!"

Their father doesn't move an inch, preferring to grin at them like a space case while their mother decides to give them each a big, fussy kiss to fulfil her maternal duties.

"Guh!" Kaoru gasps as he peels himself away. Hikaru scrubs at his cheek. "We'd say 'welcome home, mother, we've missed you', but that's no longer true."

Unfazed, she begins her customary appraisal.

"Hikaru, dear, have you been working out?" She squeezes his muscles, delight painted on her beautiful features. "Oh, you're both so handsome. François wants you to model for Bridoux Homme – I've agreed, that's fine with you, yes? Here are some magazines – pay attention to the editorial, especially Grace's – the photography is Mark's – it's marvellous, isn't it – ooh! I have to introduce you to Iara, you'll meet her at François's photoshoot too, she's Brazilian, the face of his new perfume – I think François might want either of you to model with her – Kaoru, it might be better for Hikaru to do it since you're – right! Ren says you've been making some flat patterns, I've seen them, they're fabulous – I'll review them with you at the office tomor – are you sure you should be wearing those trousers with that shirt, sweetie?"

The stack of magazines cascades onto the ground as soon as their mother turns away to smooth out Kaoru's shirt for a better view, leaving Hikaru to scramble after them.

"I'm trying to match prints, Mum." He throws his hands up in surrender.

"So I see," she replies, nodding her head speculatively. "Your belt is wrong. It makes the outfit look too busy. I've brought some spectacular pieces back for you – I might have just the thing – Fuchida!"

"Yes, Madam?" One member of the army of bellhops pauses in his task and bows deeply. The others continue like worker ants, transporting a line of suitcases to the correct rooms.

"Have you brought the blue luggage upstairs? Bring it here, please."

"And take these magazines to the second atelier," Hikaru adds, dumping them unceremoniously in Fuchida's arms.

Their father grasps their mother's shoulder gently. "You put the belts in the purple one, dear."

"The purple one," she corrects her instructions. She gazes at her husband briefly with an adoring look that is frankly slightly disturbing. "Thank you, darling."

Where Hitachiins are involved, the level of noise and activity generated increases exponentially with each Hitachiin thrown into the mix. The servants have been whipped into a frenzy with the arrival of their masters. The layered smells of a truly delicious breakfast waft out into the living room and every curtain is drawn to let the dewy morning light in. The house sounds like it would before a special occasion, except Kaoru is positive that none of them have birthdays that fall in November.

He shoots a puzzled look at Hikaru and receives a shrug in answer.

"So." Hikaru lets himself be engulfed in their mother's embrace. "We weren't expecting you. What gives?"

"We weren't expecting you to be awake, either. Your mother and I were going to sneak into your beds to give you a surprise."

"Huh?" Kaoru says at the same time that Hikaru yelps, "Do you want us to get a heart attack when we wake up?"

"Nooo," their mother says slyly. "We thought it'd be nice for the four of us to sleep together, like when you were babies."

The twins share a moment of mutual alarm.

"The both of you are scaring us."

"Why? Wanting to be with our children isn't unnatural," their father denies, swiftly followed by their mother's command that, "Tonight, we will have dinner as a family."

"As a family," their father repeats.

_What the hell?_ Hikaru demands silently.

_They're thrilled about something. Dad hasn't stopped smiling once._

"Your grandparents will be joining us," their mother informs them. "We'll all be together as a family."

"As a family," their father repeats.

_It's freaky, Kaoru!_

"Madam, the purple luggage."

Kaoru jumps up to accept the item gratefully, ransacking its contents with more concentration than is needed.

"It's the teal belt with the engraved buckle, sweetie," his mother's voice sails leisurely in his direction as she resumes inspecting Hikaru's apparently new-and-improved physique.

His father kneels beside him to aid in the search.

"How is Horiuchi Yoshi-kun?"

Kaoru eyeballs his father blankly.

"Ah. That isn't her real name, is it? What do you call her?" He pulls out a strip of teal from the mountain of clothing with ease – their father regularly displays this sort of easygoing expertise in his unerring ability to unravel the mini typhoons left in their mother's wake. "I can only protect the ex-Horiuchi-kun for so long, Kaoru. The board members were quite unhappy that I didn't seek their opinion in deciding Horiuchi-kun's punishment; they think I've dispatched 'him' out of the country and blacklisted 'him' in our industry. The reason they're not hunting her down is because they know she's poor and not worth suing. It's impossible for Horiuchi-kun to ever be Horiuchi-kun again. You need to create a new female identity for her so that she stays permanently missing.'

Behind them, there is a litany of distinct shouts. "Don't _grope_, mum!"

"I have, daddy. We have an employment contract – I'll forward the document to you. Our lawyers have seen her in person as well." Kaoru fiddles with his navy blue belt. "I wanted her to put down her real identity, although I can't shake the feeling that the information she's provided is still largely false. Her profile says that she's Sadamoto Akemi, 23 years old – I think the age is right but the name and birthday aren't. Heh. Obviously getting her to work for me was the easy part, getting her to trust me is a whole different battle."

He'd called Hacker-san's bluff on it; ultimately, he'd conceded to not know her name for now. He's usually not this forgiving. This exception is the result of the sheer déjà vu that he is experiencing. He knows why she hasn't given him her name: because she is holding on to her backup plan, an alternative escape route – if it doesn't work out with him, she can split.

Exactly like Kaoru and his brother in the early days of the host club.

"And I don't know how accurate some of the rest of the information is. Apparently, dad, she knows _eleven_ languages! How dubious is that?!"

His father shakes with laughter, his lips quirked at a private joke. "That one might actually be true, though I _highly recommend_ that you ask her to define _precisely_ what she meant by 'languages'. Kaoru, child, being a boss is really not an easy business. Your mother and I are consenting to this so that you may learn how to manage other people. We will be here for you if you need help, but you alone are responsible for whoever you choose."

"Eh? Yeah, dad."

"Do you understand? In exchange for our non-interference, you cannot rely on us as a safety net."

"_Yes_, daddy, I get the idea."

Yuzuha whirls in with a flourish. "There, sweetie, you see, that's a well-coordinated ensemble! Much better to keep within the colour scheme!"

"Yes, Mother," he acquiesces dutifully.

A servant pops in to alert them that Morinozuka-sama and Haninozuka-sama have arrived and breakfast is ready for their parents.

"Good morning, senpais!" the twins chime in unison.

Their good breeding shining through, Mori and Honey turn first to their parents to bow respectfully and exchange greetings. They end up having to spend a couple of minutes extricating themselves from the parents' exhortations to join them for the meal; finally, their parents leave them to their devices with reminders about dinner.

"Shall we go? You can accompany me, Kao-chan!" Honey steps forward effusively, thrusts Usa-chan in Kaoru's arms and drags him away to the exit.

Kaoru follows, seemingly the only one without a clear idea of what's happening.

The four of them file into the limousine and speed off to Mori's estate.

Upon arrival, Hikaru trudges after Mori obediently, leaving Honey to lead Kaoru to settle down at a distance away from the dojo, the cakes and tea making it seem as though they're having a picnic.

"Kao-chan, the next Cake Night is this Wednesday," Honey informs him expectantly.

"I'll be there, senpai," he promises.

Honey smiles, pleased.

Kaoru lets his attention drift to the other two, now attired in their _keikogi_ and warming up for their session. "They're training _now_? I thought Mori-senpai would want to give Hikaru a stern lecture first."

"Takashi knows – like Kao-chan does – that Hika-chan listens better after he's vented to his heart's content. He'll talk to Hika-chan after Hika-chan's all tired out from beating him up," Honey tells him serenely.

"Hah?! Is that really a good idea?!"

Hikaru had embarked on this regime with Mori a day after Mori had hauled him out of the club room for spouting those thoughtless comments at Kyouya and Tamaki. Whenever Kaoru had asked after them, Hikaru would say that Mori is using martial arts to teach him self-discipline, but there'd been no mention whatsoever of Mori just taking Hikaru's blows as they come.

Even with protective gear and punching bags, it's…

"Don't worry. Takashi can take it. Hika-chan wouldn't be able to catch Takashi off-guard," Honey assures him with absolute confidence. "Previously, Hika-chan always had to suppress his feelings if he didn't want to make other people sad, but it was hard on Hika-chan because he's so intense. Takashi says that what Hika-chan needs is an outlet to express himself, otherwise Hika-chan will explode in the end, as usual."

"He _does_ have an outlet. He channels it in his art," Kaoru says, surprised. "Our mother says that when he's in one of his moods, his work is at its most incendiary."

"Hee," is apparently the sum of Honey's opinion.

A prickly, fiercely protective feeling washes across Kaoru. God help him but Kaoru hasn't felt this pissed in_ years_. "I didn't know that senpais objected to how I've been trying to help Hikaru restrain his temper."

Fingers seize his chin and urge him to face Honey. Honey's visage is solemn, softened by traces of compassion.

"Doesn't Kao-chan's jaw hurt, clenching it so tightly?"

Kaoru jerks out of his grip resentfully. "Hikaru is my twin, senpai. I know him best. If my approach is wrong, senpai could have told me and I can modify it."

"It isn't wrong, and it's not that Takashi and I object. It is simply that there are many methods and no matter how hard Kao-chan tries, Kao-chan cannot always be right."

Kaoru is on his feet and stomping away before Honey finishes his sentence. Especially after yesterday, he doesn't need anyone to rub it in that there are times where he might make errors where Hikaru is concerned. There's a familiar, childish rage spreading through his veins like poison, and there is shame associated with such behaviour, yet he is reminded of how much he hates it when someone overrides his judgement about anything to do with Hikaru – hates it with every fibre of his being.

Several quick footsteps, a flash of blond and half a minute later, Kaoru finds his bottom planted securely on the picnic mat and Usa-chan back in his lap as though he'd never left.

"We know that to have either Kao-chan or Hika-chan change because of an outsider's influence is huge to you." Honey busies himself with fixing two cups of tea. "It doesn't necessarily mean that Kao-chan or Hika-chan was wrong about what the other person needs. It just means that you're human, and the only way humans change is through contact with other people."

Something in that little speech sets off bells in Kaoru's head.

"I see," he remarks abruptly. "Mori-senpai is dealing with Hikaru, you're dealing with me… Is Kyouya-senpai with Tono?"

Honey casually blows on his tea in a manner more suited to Kyouya. "Does it matter? Today is about Kao-chan and me."

He glowers at his senior. "Why didn't any of you do anything?" he demands. "I know you heard them."

"Takashi believed that you both needed to get it out of your systems."

"_Both_? I was trying to stop them! I needed help and none of you backed me up," he protests crossly.

"Kao-chan had nothing that he wanted to say at all?" Honey asks lightly, a gleam in his eyes. "Even to those of us that Kao-chan hasn't really talked to in the past two months and a half?"

"You think that is a good enough justification for yesterday's argument, senpai?" he counters, attempting to restrain the amount of belligerence injected into his tone. He doesn't want to pick a fight with Honey, but suddenly he's so _angry_. "Worse, if you knew about the way Hikaru was feeling and allowed him to hurt Tono so that he could let off steam, how can any of you call yourselves our seniors?"

Pensively, Honey places a forkful of cake in his mouth.

"Eat, Kao-chan."

Kaoru does as ordered, selecting the crisp lemon tart. It singes his tongue with its tanginess and melds into the bitterness he's feeling, such that he can no longer differentiate between the flavour of the fruit and the piercing realisation of where he has once encountered this particular version of Honey.

The question answers itself: this Honey exists in the past. This… isn't even _Honey_.

He is Haninozuka-senpai, the one that Kaoru was introduced to all those years ago, the senior from the prestigious family in the A class 2 years above him, who was so polite and effervescent that none but the most paranoid would suspect him of possessing an alter ego, who topped his class and was never arrogant but to whom humility was a complete stranger, who appeared sweet and kind enough but always, _always_ gave off an aura that unnerved Kaoru for reasons he could never articulate, and Kaoru remembers that –

Of all the club members, both he and Kyouya had taken the longest to properly warm to Honey.

Looking at him, Kaoru knows.

Who else among them would have had ample opportunity to witness and dissect the source of Hikaru's frustration?

Who knows Kaoru to the degree that he can discern not only what Kaoru knows, but also what Kaoru wants?

Who else would have the power to control and convince both Mori and Kyouya?

Even assuming that Mori had really been the original advocate in making the three of them thrash out their issues, and assuming that Tamaki had confided in Kyouya about finding a way to talk to the twins – this merely means that Mori had the knowledge and Kyouya had the plan.

Only Honey had both.

The anger from before morphs into a faintly greasy sickness that must indicate certain truth, and a creeping sense of _fear_.

It's an old fear, not entirely irrational, born within the slice of society that is constantly trying to stick daggers into others' backs, of premeditated strategies and schemes and the calculating wait for them to come to fruition…

Kaoru loves Honey.

He honestly does, and for him, faith is a part of love.

"S-senpai," he exhales shakily, white-knuckled fists scrunched over Usa-chan, "Sorry. I'm sorry. Was your plan for me? It was, wasn't it?"

Hands close over his urgently, the strength of the grip belying their small size.

"Of course it was for you and Hika-chan and Tama-chan," Honey says, voice back to his normal childlike pitch. "Kao-chan doesn't need me to explain that it's not inherently bad to orchestrate a desired result. As Kao-chan's senpais, we do what you need, which isn't always the same as what you want. Kao-chan was annoyed with Tama-chan for not speaking up about America not because Tama-chan is unimportant, but because Tama-chan is important to you. That's why I'm annoyed with Kao-chan too, because Kao-chan doesn't speak up and because Kao-chan is important."

"I know that… I _know_, senpai, but saying it out loud wouldn't change anything. I'm not Hikaru. I don't blow up just because I feel terrible about something. If it's my insecurities causing these problems, then it's my battle to fight. And Tono shouldn't have to suffer for it. I can see that now. I won't do it again."

At this, Honey smiles. "You know, Tama-chan would willingly suffer for it if Kao-chan would only let him in."

"We've already let him in plenty," Kaoru says somewhat sulkily as he arranges his body into a foetal position at Honey's feet, cushioning his head on Usa-chan. "When I thought he was going to leave with Haruhi, my body was gathering information online and making calls to the school before my mind even had a chance to catch up. Then I thought of the things Tono does in club and short of cloning him, I couldn't come up with any solution to keep the customers coming in. I can't believe I actually think so highly of him, Honey-senpai."

Honey giggles teasingly. "It must have been confronting for Kao-chan."

"It was!" Kaoru asserts vehemently. "I like Tono and I know that he's done a lot of things that are worthy of respect! I just didn't think that – "

He checks himself at the last minute. He'd been about to say something considerably harsh and hurtful.

"Kao-chan didn't think that he personally respected Tama-chan," Honey concludes on his behalf, not bothering to phrase it as a question. "Kao-chan and Hika-chan acknowledge what Tama-chan has done for them, but because Tama-chan is silly, Kao-chan didn't think he was a person to look up to."

While Kaoru is floundering inside in a bid to summon a response, Honey crouches over him and presses their lips together, effectively robbing Kaoru of the last of his faculties.

Like a dragonfly grazing the surface of a pond, Honey pulls away, leaving no evidence except for the smallest of ripples to prove that anything extraordinary had occurred.

"Eheheh. That is what Hika-chan does when Kao-chan is stressed, ne?"

To understand Kaoru's reaction to the kiss is to understand an ignored, hidden truth about the six male hosts.

With Haruhi away, they've lapsed a little into the people they used to be. Their ways of communication are more than one, more than verbal, less than truth, less than logical; what else can it be, when assumptions and shared backgrounds – the most unreliable factors of all – can actually form the basis of a relationship? Having no need to tone down or translate the oft complex mechanics of their world for their valued friend, they don't hold back – their interactions are a touch more audacious, possibly even a little more _twisted_. Haruhi may not agree, but when the seven of them are together, the differences are sometimes erased to negligible. Sometimes, infrequently, Kaoru forgets that Haruhi is a commoner. He sees and understands a part of it, this concept of being human; when they love, when they are loyal, their hearts are the same.

What makes them different, then, is this: it takes a certain mentality to voluntarily start or join a _host club_.

Kaoru has no way of confirming whether Haruhi is aware that she changed the nature of the club itself. That is a fact. The fact is a Schrödinger's cat paradox – to know if Haruhi knows of it, Kaoru will first have to tell her:

Host Club without Haruhi was a plaything of princes and princesses, a seething mass of combined wishes to escape from reality. Fulfilling their customers' wishes meant running away with them instead of standing their ground against the challenge of living. Her membership changed it to a place where wishes were fulfilled permanently instead of temporarily – where they struck at the very root of the things that were driving them to the club in the first place.

By the time Haruhi decided that she too loved being in the club, the club she joined hadn't been the same one that the six of them had signed up for. Her club was – is – a force for good, a refuge that actually leads to a new way out. No turning around in circles in a maze of illusions.

In essence, the six of them play with emotion. They test its boundaries, use it as a means to an end, to express what they cannot say with words, to express something _contrary_ to their words, to ensnare, to control, to distance, to reject. Not all of them do it malevolently (Tamaki, Mori), not all of them do it intentionally (Tamaki); one of them even does it as altruistically as a human being can manage (Tamaki), _but they all do it._

That is why:

In a subversion of the inflated antics of shoujo manga, the kiss doesn't make Kaoru leap into action or flip out on his senior; rather, there is an inevitability surrounding it – a natural progression. As they become closer, their repertoire of expression must expand to account for more openness between them, more variation on emotion, more flexibility and change.

Kaoru lingers at the crossroads, pondering his choice. If he accepts the kiss, it'll symbolise his acceptance of Honey to the same degree that he accepts Hikaru. It'll mean permission to criticise him like Hikaru does, to support him, to demand from him, to give to him…

It's ludicrously intricate, but it is what it is.

Kaoru is afraid.

He makes up his mind to refuse and tilts his head up to tell his senior so, and as he does he brushes against the soft pink fur of Usa-chan – in an instant he is hit by a sharp epiphany about what it means that Honey has entrusted Usa-chan to him for three days a week.

"Honey-senpai…"

Gentle, calloused hands do not stop running through his hair.

"I only seem like I'd be easier to deal with than Hikaru, but actually I – "

Honey is already laughing. He stands up and pulls Kaoru along, away from the dojo and in the direction of the car porch by the front gate.

"Where're we going, senpai?" Kaoru lags behind in a daze.

A smile, warm as sunshine. "Someplace special."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) References:

Kurakano and Sakurazuka, the twins and Haruhi's classmates: Chapter 70, page 5.

The twins' lewd photomanips: Chapter 5, page 3.

The club following Haruhi and Tamaki on their date: Chapter 82.

Hot spring incident: Chapter 59.

(b) Taiga drama is the name NHK gives to the annual historical fiction television series broadcast throughout an entire year on Sunday nights. It is precisely the sort of sweeping epic that romantic types like Tamaki love to watch and follow obsessively. The elements of Japanese history are often combined with a love story (or two), a war/battle (or two) and elevated ideals of honour and integrity – Tamaki falls for it hook, line, sinker.

(c) Immature love says: 'I love you because I need you.' Mature love says 'I need you because I love you.' – Erich Fromm

(d) I am with the Usa-chan is freaky and evil brigade. *adores*

(e) I must confess to a pet peeve here: it always pissed me off a little that Tamaki just didn't feel the need to tell the others that he was going with Haruhi to Boston. It was apparently meant to be self-evident, he claims. Kyouya had to follow up on it himself and make Tamaki announce it – page 17. Apart from its comic purpose, it's rather annoying. Because as soon as the others realised Tamaki and Haruhi were leaving, they followed them without hesitation – I think it reveals something important and somewhat sad. Their occasional blissful ignorance means that Tamaki and Haruhi are sometimes selfish without realising it; as in, they don't realise how much the others' worlds revolve around them, so it's up to the others to play catch up.

.

Acknowledgements

Thank you very much to all the very kind people who favourited/put on alerts/reviewed during my horribly extended absence.

22/11/2011 (Happy birthday, Kyouya)

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><p>.<p>

_Continued in Part B._


	10. Chapter 5B

**CHAPTER FIVE(B)**

**White Team Fight!**

.

**B.**

This is Mitsukuni.

A Haninozuka, and everything that the family name entails.

The eldest, with all its privileges and burdens.

A perceptive anti-planner, and the darker half.

Supervisor of the White Team.

Kaoru glides his fingers reverently along the gleaming, flawless yellow finish of the Gallardo Spyder, grinning maniacally at Honey all the while. On Honey's face is an expression of muted glee, its features illuminated by the garage lights glinting off the sleek metallic lines of this beautiful car to reveal a cocked brow and a sly smile hovering just barely out of sight.

The door leading to the racetrack rolls open with a grinding sound – rays of midday sun spill in like a revelation, and Kaoru stands transfixed.

There is something knowing and coy about Honey as he strides over to the passenger side and holds the car door invitingly, every bit the aristocratic gentleman that his name suggests he would be. Awed, Kaoru takes a step closer and places his hand in his senior's, who curls his fingers to give him a warm, reassuring squeeze before helping him into the car and shutting the door decisively.

Its soft top is fully retracted to provide maximum enjoyment from the magnificently clear blue skies that await them. Honey makes his way around to the driver's side in the time it takes to blink, bracing one small hand against the car soundlessly to leap into his seat in an agile slide. He leans over Kaoru – pressed near enough to envelope Kaoru in his vanilla scented cologne – snags the seatbelt and buckles Kaoru in in one unbelievably smooth movement.

"Don't let Usa-chan fly away," he whispers tenderly, voice lush with anticipation.

Kaoru can't remember when he last thought of Honey as being so _cool_.

Honey turns the ignition and revs the engine, his eyes wickedly ablaze with passion.

"Ready?"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The image of windswept, sunlit blond hair will forever be burned into Kaoru's retinas. Set off by the striking Lamborghini Midas yellow, his senior _owns_ this car in a way that transcends property – it is something beyond physical possession, something very much like a part of Honey has been locked into the act of driving at insane speeds, at tackling difficult corners, at manoeuvring with deadly precision.

Honey loves feeling the _danger_, Kaoru realises, and his confidence in his skill is _absolute_.

They're both exhilarated from the uninhibited laps around the gloriously empty racetrack. Kaoru's cheeks are scorched from the blistering cold winds but he is glad to have witnessed this.

He is so glad to have shared in this experience.

Honey has slowed the Spyder to a slow cruise. For a person who'd obtained his Class 1 license a mere 4 months prior, his technique is far too pronounced for this hobby to have been a recent acquisition. He handles the wheel as a blade would skate across ice, his acceleration and braking is perfect, his gear changes are seamless; indeed, his demeanour evinces a familiarity and an almost-lazy ease that must have come from long years of dedicated labour and innate talent.

When Honey turns to smile at him – oh, such smouldering relish, such _unimaginable brilliance_ –

This particular Honey, Kaoru has never once encountered. He is the distilled, lucid version of a Honey who has been forcibly awoken from sleep; the very definition of raw power compacted into a crackling core of energy.

And it hits Kaoru, it hits him hard –

This facet of Honey is the realest and truest, and

_It is breathtaking._

Compelled to stare, each incapable of looking away, they bind the other in an electric exchange. The car has rolled to a stop, irrelevant where there is a lack of traffic except for the fact that there is now nothing to distract them from the irrevocable and entirely unexpected step they have taken in regards to their relationship, and Kaoru is thinking, _oh god_.

_Oh god._

For a crazy, crazy second, he feels like there is nothing of Honey that he doesn't know. He feels like Honey is _his_.

Kaoru has only ever felt this way towards Hikaru and he _doesn't know how to react_ – what is he to do, so this is how it feels, never knew never saw it coming, and it is wondrous, staggering, to have someone else willingly take themselves apart for you so that you become able to understand them. He'd been the outmatched fool who hadn't even known he was outmatched. Honey had been out of his realm of comprehension, too deep and too complex, and it is only the sacrifice of breaking himself down into his individual components that allows Kaoru to _see _what he'd missed before.

Quietly, "Kao-chan really is a quick study."

_No, not quick at all._

A floaty, tinkling laugh. "Kao-chan is training himself to feel worthless whenever he does that. Rather than directing your attention towards your failure, why don't you direct it towards processing the new information that you've been given? Although Kao-chan usually bounces back eventually, Kao-chan's reaction time is slow. That is why Kao-chan never cuts his losses fast enough."

Stunned, Kaoru sits there numbly as he tries to regain a semblance of control over his scrambled thoughts.

Honey reaches over and fondly tucks his fringe behind his ear before exiting the car and signalling to an attendant, who swiftly makes his way over to them to retrieve the car. Kaoru is led away by his senior to the main grandstand, where they sequester themselves in one of the 10 VIP Platinum Rooms overlooking the circuit. Kaoru clutches the drink that had been served to him by another attendant as he finds out that Honey has been karting informally from the age of 6, and has been taking part in licensed racing – mostly overseas – since 8 years old.

And, he finds out that this Lamborghini is not the only toy his senior owns.

"Senpai… How big is your collection…?" he bleats weakly.

Honey fairly sparkles at him. "Twenty-three cars! They will be fully, legally mine when I turn twenty. It's interesting that this has come up, Kao-chan, because I don't think Kao-chan has realised that Yuuichi-san is trying to strike before Kyou-chan reaches his age of majority."

Words are buzzing around Kaoru's head – he knows they should mean something, yet all he can think of is, "How many cars did you say you have again?", because if Hikaru will fight, no holds barred, for a ride in the Spyder, he will die for the chance to admire and fondle a selection of the finest supercars.

"Twenty-three," Honey replies. Seeing that it is not to Kaoru's satisfaction, he elaborates, "Including an Aston Martin DB9, DBS V12; Porsche 997 GT2 RS, GT3; Audi R8 V10, A8; Maserati GT; Ferrari F430 Scuderia, 599, 458 Italia; Mercedes S65 AMG; BMW M5; Nissan GTR; and I've ordered the Koenigsegg Agera and the Bugatti Veyron 16.4 Super Sport World Record Edition."

Kaoru shakes his head in disbelief. "How did I never know this about you, senpai?"

"Hee. Apart from Takashi and my parents, I haven't brought anyone here," Honey says somewhat distantly. "Although I did tell Kyou-chan about it when he asked me if I wanted to be on the club's executive council. Kyou-chan was obviously being polite; he and Tama-chan don't need my help to manage the club. I turned him down anyway, to pursue my interest in cars – I enjoy racing."

What an understatement. Even with cakes, Honey's obsession is tinged with an innocent, unrestrainable adoration; today, he'd exhibited a different form of excitement – utterly indescribable – himself the unstoppable force bursting like kindled flame, himself an agent of danger.

It doesn't take a genius to figure out that Honey is not someone that you'd want to cross. However, with clarity, Kaoru appreciates that his senior is content to be mostly harmless nearly all of the time. He simply isn't sure why. A ruse to mislead opponents? A deliberate suppression of himself to keep the peace? A ploy of obfuscating stupidity? A social tool to help him blend in?

Not that Honey's routine behaviour can be categorised as 'blending in' with human beings who function normally…

Does Honey even _have_ a motive?

"Good, Kao-chan. Exactly like that."

Kaoru refocuses on his senior, completely at sea.

"Always move onwards to the next order of business. Kao-chan wants to know how Kyou-chan is so quick-witted; here is your answer. Reduce the time that you spend blaming yourself and immediately latch on to any new facts that you've been presented with. When things go wrong, enough people are going to try to shift the blame onto Kao-chan without Kao-chan doing it himself."

"Ah! That's…"

"Common sense, Kao-chan. Even if Kao-chan ends up with endless questions, it is only by questioning that Kao-chan will arrive at the answers. The right questions will lead to the right answers, and more questions will lead to more answers. When Kao-chan condemns himself, he's asking: 'why didn't I know the answer?' rather than 'what _is_ the answer?'. Analysing your errors should come after solving the problem. Kao-chan, knowing why you've failed in and of itself generally doesn't solve anything – it's a precedent to stop you from making the same mistake the next time."

"I – I know that. Hikaru and Kyouya-senpai have mentioned it to me. I _try_, but it's hard for me – "

"It's hard for Kao-chan because Kao-chan views himself as a stabilising force, especially for Hika-chan. Kao-chan wants to be selfless."

Kaoru sets his glass down on the table carefully, or he suspects he may drop it in surprise later on.

"Why does – I just prefer to develop my self-awareness, senpai! I need to know where I've gone wrong! It has no connection to Hikaru!"

"Oh, Kao-chan," Honey says, and it could have been terribly patronising. Instead, coming from this master, it is caring and accepting, a calming presence that resonates within Kaoru. He sits down beside Kaoru and rests his palm against Kaoru's knee, as though he knows – of course he knows – that Kaoru responds well to physical contact.

"Kyou-chan likes to know where he's gone wrong too, but it isn't hard for Kyou-chan to stop blaming himself. Sometimes Kyou-chan doesn't blame himself at all."

"That's because Kyouya-senpai is practical and smart and he doesn't let himself waste time and effort on – "

"No. No, Kao-chan," Honey sighs. "What do the people who blame themselves have in common?"

"Perfectionism, senpai," Kaoru says promptly. "They reject anything less."

Honey quirks a wry smile. "Try again," he urges.

Kaoru racks his brains.

"Umm… But, senpai, doesn't perfectionism lead to self-blame? It's just – even knowing that they are putting a lot of pressure on themselves, perfectionists often have difficulty aiming lower."

"That's right, Kao-chan. Perfectionism _leads_ to self-blame. They are not the same thing. Rejecting anything less can manifest in blaming other people," Honey tells him. "Takashi isn't a perfectionist, though he often blames himself. Kyou-chan _is_ a perfectionist, yet he rarely does. People who blame themselves either take on excessive personal responsibility, like Takashi, or they are unable to let go of the past; in some cases, they do both, like you, Kao-chan. Everything about Kao-chan has everything to do with Hika-chan. In Kao-chan's mind, he is the one who is stable, constant – Kao-chan hangs on to give Hika-chan the freedom to change his mind, to be Hika-chan's home base when Hika-chan runs after what he wants. Doesn't this mean that Kao-chan naturally resists change? So when change occurs – when accidents take place – Kao-chan is looking back, turning back, scolding himself for not doing better, for not preventing it; in the end, by asking himself what he could have done to control the change, Kao-chan misses the opportunity to actually control it."

Knocked speechless, Kaoru tries to rapidly absorb what his senior is telling him. He finds he cannot dispute anything Honey has said, and he scratches the back of his head sheepishly, mouth slightly agape.

"Kao-chan is worried about becoming club president, isn't it? Let's work on it! No more worrying in silence," Honey declares. "No more running circles around us in order to find a solution. Kao-chan thinks that his emotions are his problem alone, so he doesn't express them to us. It's good, in that Kao-chan takes responsibility for the way he feels, but at the same time, Kao-chan never truly solves his problems. That's why Kao-chan invariably tries to change the external circumstances, in the belief that when the external circumstances change, his internal feelings will have to change along with it."

"Hehh… heh heh… senpai…"

"Shall we try something new, Kao-chan? Everything that Kao-chan doesn't understand, everything that Kao-chan wants to ask, will Kao-chan honestly list them out?"

Kaoru is acutely aware that though they may have left the car, Honey has never once vacated the driving seat. By this point, he is fully seized of the implications of what he'd agreed to in front of Mori's dojo – Honey and Mori's amenability to staying on the sidelines does not preclude their capacity to act when circumstances call for it, and if there's anyone who could reasonably be expected to help the twins to grow… if Honey and Mori team up to work on them…

Kaoru realises, with a sense of instinctive but ungrounded horror, that they might actually succeed.

The kingly yin-yang combination of Kyouya and Tamaki so easily outshine everything else that it has a tendency to dominate the attention of the school population. At times it seems that the poster boy and the manager single-handedly create miracles, and it is during those moments where it slips the mind that the host club possesses two other big guns in its artillery – 'cannons' is more apt a description, and Mori is a one-man tank – who _train the freaking military_ and are capable of serving other people's asses to them on a plate even when grossly outnumbered.

The résumé is already impressive, yet this evaluation of his seniors' might hasn't taken into account other critical factors. For example, Kaoru thinks that the average Haninozuka or Morinozuka could probably bypass most, if not all, of the security systems of the upper-class Japanese families and assassinate them; actually, considering that they socialise in the same ranks of society, they could simply let fly their shuriken during a ball. It's arguable whether they'd make it out alive, though getting to the target shouldn't pose an insurmountable difficulty. It's one of those things that, if studied too intently, makes people very uncomfortable.

Incidentally, this reminds him of a wacky story his grandmother once told him and Hikaru (… which sounds less and less wacky by the instant) – of the time where Honey's beloved grandmother, the great sensei who made Usa-chan, commissioned Kaoru's grandmother to disguise a number of sharp blades into the stalks and petals of real flowers to wear as a hair ornament to a formal dinner which had been held in honour of the visiting Queen Elizabeth II. Haninozuka females habitually opt for the distance disciplines, notably _Kyūdō_ (and _shurikenjutsu_, though the family doesn't acknowledge this secretive art), to distract their enemies and support their men in the front lines of battle. It's a good rule of thumb, their grandmother had said, to presume that no Haninozuka ever leaves himself or herself defenceless.

Besides, despite being practitioners of the traditional martial arts, Kaoru is convinced that they are also masters of modern weaponry. Owing to their primary reputation, and the fact that their prescribed training regimen for the military is concerned with physical endurance and close quarters combat, many appear to take it for granted (or perhaps they hope in vain) that the Haninozukas turn their noses up at contemporary advances in warfare.

What Kaoru sees is: his senior is explicitly in tune with the possibilities of machinery.

What Kaoru hears is: he's talked to Yorihisa-sama enough to deduce that he is an extremely intelligent, if eccentric, man who emphasises continual self-improvement and makes decisions based on the benefits to his family and the Morinozuka family.

What Kaoru knows is: 1) Honey and Mori are incomparably proficient at sports because they approach everything with a 'can do' attitude. 2) Mori is short-sighted but not Honey. 3) Not only is Honey _not_ short-sighted, his family is famously genetically blessed in the realm of visual acuity – Yorihisa-sama has 20/15 vision, and both Honey and Chika have inherited 20/10 vision from their late grandmother.

Kaoru is willing to bet that his senior has, in all likelihood, handled firearms in spite of his age. At the very least his senior would have been to a shooting range and tried his hand at airsoft guns, because no one who utilises the MachBunny IV so expertly can be devoid of some laudable level of marksmanship.

Amongst the elite, there are some more elite than others. In terms of ancestry, the Haninozuka family is on par with the Suous, which means – whisper it – they are a smidge nobler than the Ootoris. Wielding both pen and sword equally well, their legacy is a chain of courtiers and warrior generals whose influence peaked during the mid-feudal era (having associated with Honey and Mori in cozy proximity, Kaoru can see how their militant forebears would have ruled supreme), as opposed to the Ootori family, who only really came into their own during the Tokugawa period.

There's something dryly ironic about that, since the Ootoris have long thrived in the medical field; that is to say, recovery from injury and disease, much of which had been brought about by – you guessed it: war.

As Honey is a legitimate heir, his blood is technically the bluest of their assorted bunch, eclipsing their endearingly daft club president, and it is the ravages of war that led to the stripping of land, wealth and status from the Haninozuka clan, crippling them to an extent that allowed them to be overtaken in significance and clout. Having adapted triumphantly to their changing circumstances, they remain unsurpassed by new money but affluent pedigree families have risen to rival their esteemed position.

"This is senpai's plan!" Kaoru exclaims. "Senpai planned to bring me here today! To – to show me how much I – "

"Do I really look like a person with a plan, Kao-chan?" Enormous brown eyes gaze at him. "It was Takashi who wanted Hika-chan to train today. And yesterday it was Kyou-chan and Tama-chan who asked us not to interfere to give Tama-chan time to talk to you. All of Kao-chan's senpais are looking out for him!"

_Erk_. Really? But Kaoru had been sure that Honey was playing his hand.

"Then – then why is senpai…?"

"I agree with their plans, Kao-chan. I'm just reacting to what I thought Kao-chan needed. It's fun chatting with friends, isn't it? It lets Kao-chan know that he's not alone."

"Ah… I didn't think I was alone! I knew I was being silly."

Honey grins at him indulgently. "Kao-chan's not alone in being silly."

A self-deprecating laugh escapes Kaoru. He's a member of the _host club_, champions of the absurd and the nonsensical. It's amazing how he manages to feel stupid among them.

He ruminates over a number of issues while sipping at his non-alcoholic cocktail, forcing back the desire to blurt everything out indiscriminately. It's not that he doesn't trust Honey – on the contrary, he's hesitant because he doesn't know whether he'll like the answers he receives.

If he asks, Honey will reply. And Honey will be right.

Kaoru still believes that Honey had enacted a plan. It's a matter of gut instinct; just as he senses that the rest of the things Honey had claimed about what Mori, Kyouya and Tamaki were thinking is true – but he knows, he _knows_ Honey had something to do with it somewhere. Wouldn't it be _frightful_ if Honey had orchestrated those three into orchestrating the confrontation?

He slants a nervous glance at his senior, who's tossing Usa-chan in the air with carefree jubilance.

_Can anyone be that effortlessly superior?_

"Yes, Kao-chan? Ready to begin your list?"

Kaoru flinches at being caught.

"Uhh," he hedges, and to cover it up he blabs out the thing at the forefront of his mind but which he'd wished to discuss the least, "Kyouya-senpai could tell Hikaru and I apart before Haruhi."

Honey instantaneously breaks into what must be the biggest non-cake-related smile in his life.

Okay, that pretty much confirms that Mori also knows that Haruhi hadn't been the first.

Dejected, Kaoru slouches down in his seat. "I… I guess I thought Haruhi was special. I thought nobody else could do what she could. I mean, even our nanny who lived with us couldn't tell who was who."

"Haru-chan _is_ special."

Kaoru heaves a fatigued breath. "Apparently not. Honey-senpai, what should I do? I don't dare to say anything to Hikaru. It'll ruin him."

A flash of an emotion across Honey's face, too rapid to be identified. "Has Kao-chan considered the possibility that he might be mistaken about the actual nature of Haru-chan's power?"

"… What do you mean, senpai?" he ventures, straightening a little in curiosity.

"Does Kao-chan know why Kyou-chan kept quiet about it?"

Kaoru's chuckle sounds strained to his own ears. "There's no merit in it for Kyouya-senpai. The worst case is Hikaru and I would have rejected him, and Tono would have to search for more club members. I can't imagine us sticking to him like we did to Haruhi. No doubt Kyouya-senpai catalogued it for future use anyway."

"Eheheh. It's true that Kyou-chan weighed the pros and cons, but Kyou-chan is not callous. Kao-chan should know that by now."

"I do! I kind of hope that part of the reason was that Kyouya-senpai cared about us. It's quite far-fetched, though. We weren't even friends then."

"Is Kao-chan saying that he doesn't believe Kyou-chan cares about others unless Kyou-chan is friends with them?" Honey questions in an oddly disappointed tone.

"No! No, Honey-senpai. What I'm saying is, I think Kyouya-senpai is largely indifferent to most people, but he wouldn't antagonize or harm others without provocation. Ahaha! Yeah, in general, the things that Kyouya-senpai does frequently minimise the inconvenience and risk for everyone involved! It's like he doesn't really care but he cares enough anyway, and by that time we were already '_employees _of the club', so Kyouya-senpai wouldn't have… Oh. _Oh_." Kaoru pauses, comprehension dawning on him. "Honey-senpai is saying that Kyouya-senpai knew that to distinguish between Hikaru and I would be to hurt us."

Honey presses an achingly soft kiss on Kaoru's temple.

"Kao-chan and Hika-chan weren't ready. Kao-chan needed to have Hika-chan by his side while his world expanded. If Kao-chan had been separated from Hika-chan before their shared social circle had widened, neither of you would have survived it. Kyou-chan was aware that he could not have broken the news to Kao-chan and Hika-chan gently; given Kyou-chan's upbringing, Kyou-chan accordingly practises _primum non nocere_. That's why it doesn't matter that Kyou-chan can tell you apart, because Haru-chan was the right person at the right time with the right temperament. That makes Haru-chan important and irreplaceable."

It's on the tip of Kaoru's tongue to solicit a second affirmation of Kyouya's rationale, and suddenly… there's no need, because it's all true.

"Haruhi wasn't gentle!" he objects, flabbergasted. "She said Hikaru was mean!"

"She _was_. Haru-chan never thought it was a big deal that she could differentiate between Hika-chan and Kao-chan. Doesn't this indicate that Haru-chan has only ever seen you as individuals? Haru-chan didn't have an agenda; she wasn't seeking to impress anybody or make use of anyone – Haru-chan's kind heart made her blunt words gentle."

Kaoru has to wonder how long it has been since the three wise seniors of the club have reached this particular conclusion. This faultless logic, he submits entirely to it.

Yes.

This is the reason Haruhi has the _right _to say what she thinks of them _individually_.

"Ugghhh…" he groans as he crumples to his left pitifully and lays his head on Honey's lap. "To think I – I'm ashamed that I ever thought of myself as insightful."

"Hmm?" Honey ponders liltingly. "What did I say about focusing on your failures?"

"React fast. Cut my losses. Yeah."

Honey bobs his head in a jaunty nod. "That's how Kao-chan will learn to be a quitter like Kyou-chan."

"Eh?!" Kaoru raises himself up on his elbows. "Kyouya-senpai is anything but!"

Honey meets his eyes conspiratorially. "Eight months ago," he begins conversationally, "there was a scandal in the food importing industry. Does Kao-chan know it?"

"… Tomimeshi?"

For decades, Tomimeshi had been one of the top food importing companies in Japan. The person to whom the company owed its success, Noda Kujo, died at sixty-two years old after a short battle with cancer and his only child Noda Kuroda took over his business a year ago amidst much contention and a lack of support from the Tomimeshi's board. To increase the profit margin, Noda junior changed several overseas suppliers to people who were less ethical about handling and packaging the food; tens of thousands of people came down with food poisoning before they managed to recall their products.

"Yes. Because of his friendship with Kujo-chan, Kyou-chan had quite a lot of shares in Tomimeshi. When Noda Kuroda-san – "

_Kujo-chan?!_

"Wait, senpai! Wh – How do you know this!"

"Ara? Kyou-chan's family hospitals were supplied by Tomimeshi, ne? When their contract expired in 2006 and Ootori-sama decided not to renew it, Kyou-chan stayed in contact with Kujo-chan. As I was saying, when Noda Kuroda-san took over the company, the share price continued to be stable and high, and many shareholders chose not to sell their shares despite their misgivings about him. They thought that even if Noda Kuroda-san wasn't as good at running a business as Kujo-chan, he would at least keep the company going," Honey explains. "Kyou-chan sold _all_ his shares the day after Kujo-chan passed away. To escape dead ends quickly is a skill, Kao-chan. On an occasion where something no longer works for Kao-chan, Kao-chan must quit fast and quit without guilt."

Kaoru scoffs a little. "I know how Noda Kuroda is like! He's _dense_. Does senpai think I'll hang on in misguided hope if I'd owned shares?"

Honey smiles sadly at him. "In that situation, no."

"And I do in other situations?!" Kaoru demands, mildly outraged.

"What does Kao-chan think he was doing with Haru-chan? For that matter, after Kao-chan's fruitless confession to Haru-chan, what does Kao-chan think he was doing with Hika-chan and Tama-chan too?"

Honey's scrutiny is unnerving.

Kaoru shrinks in on himself, feeling about two inches tall. His fingers have gone as cold as Kyouya's and he's resisting the shudder that's threatening to crawl up his back. He has an unpleasant premonition that he's going to receive an ass-kicking from Honey, one that has been a long time coming.

"Kao-chan was the first to recognise his feelings for Haru-chan, yet Kao-chan dawdled, unable to decide between giving up on Haru-chan and giving up on maintaining the status quo. Hika-chan finally pushed Kao-chan into action; instead of making a razor-clean cut, Kao-chan then chose to mitigate his loss by helping Hika-chan when he should have pulled away."

"I helped Hikaru because _I'm his twin_, senpai," Kaoru hisses, the hard edge from before creeping back into his voice.

"I believe that Kao-chan felt duty-bound and was happy to help Hika-chan," Honey acknowledges freely. "But you don't fool me, Kao-chan. At a time where Kao-chan's emotions were so fresh, it must have been painful to struggle with them alone. No – the whole reason is: a part of Kao-chan still thinks that he can share everything with Hika-chan. Isn't it? If Haru-chan had accepted Hika-chan, if Haru-chan joins Kao-chan's family, then in a small way Kao-chan will have her as well."

Honey throws out these statements like… like…! Like _reporting the weather_, he's calm and sure and gallingly assured about their veracity.

There's compassion threading through it, which _kills _Kaoru.

"Even so, Honey-senpai," Kaoru whispers, "How could I just step back and leave Hikaru to suffer by himself? How could I, when Haruhi was already showing signs of affection towards Tono? On the snow mountain, Hikaru was torn between Tono and Haruhi, he was stupid and _helpless_ and – "

"The bond between Kao-chan and Hika-chan is strong. Hika-chan is worth the time and stress of holding on," Honey yields. "Is Kyou-chan?"

Clearly, "Yes."

"All right, Kao-chan. In that case, is Kao-chan going about it the right way?"

"…No," Kaoru admits, disheartened.

"Why is it incorrect?"

"Kyouya-senpai isn't impressed by hard work. Hard work is the norm and improvement is expected." Kaoru can't stop Kyouya's time to catch up to him – with every step forward that he takes, so does Kyouya; he mightn't be able to keep the two third-year seniors in his field of vision once they begin sprinting away.

"In other words, Kao-chan knows that he's fighting a losing battle?"

_When he puts it that way…_

"Senpai, please don't be so harsh!" Kaoru wails.

Honey directs a piercing glance at him and falls silent obligingly. The dialogue stalls completely since Kaoru can offer no defence or justification. Tension mounts steadily amidst the sounds of their rhythmic breathing, though Kaoru appears to be the only one affected by it.

"I'll pay more attention, Honey-senpai," he says finally. "Now that I know how many things I've missed noticing, I'll keep a closer watch."

Half expecting Honey to give a nod of approval at last, he finds to his great bemusement that Honey bubbles over with amused giggles.

"… What?" he asks warily.

"Kyou-chan is not hard to read at all. He thinks he is, but he isn't, Kao-chan."

Kaoru sighs resignedly. "Maybe not for you, senpai."

"Not for Kao-chan either!" Honey chirps.

His shoulders hunched in frustration, Kaoru barely manages to stop himself from rolling his eyes defiantly. His senior catches the aborted action easily.

"Kao-chan doesn't need to worry about his powers of observation. It is because Kao-chan _does_ see, that is why Kao-chan is feeling this way. That's the problem of being too perceptive, you know. You start to think you can do everything, because you can see everything," Honey comments as he gazes down at a group of workers emerging from the garages, resembling small insects from this distance.

Kaoru blinks at him.

After a pause, "It's interesting that Kao-chan used the term 'impress'."

"Huh?" He is thrown by the non sequitur.

"Earlier. Kao-chan mentioned that Kyou-chan isn't impressed by hard work. That implies that Kao-chan is aiming to impress Kyou-chan."

Vaguely embarrassed though unsure why, Kaoru mumbles some polite but trite excuses that Honey swiftly interrupts.

"Isn't Kao-chan being a little quick to discount his subconscious? Kao-chan has good instincts; follow them."

"So… I really do have to impress Kyouya-senpai?"

"Yes," Honey agrees, eyes twinkling. In a tone that borders on playful, he questions, "Why?"

"I wish I knew." Kaoru frowns. "I just feel it. Can't explain it."

"Hmm," Honey hums rather suggestively, neither affirming nor denying anything.

"Then again, practically everyone wants to impress Kyouya-senpai. It might be that Kyouya-senpai's opinion simply carries that much weight."

"Or," Honey proposes slowly, deliberately, "perhaps, Kao-chan, some people may have sensed that it is one of the keys to unlock Kyou-chan's defences."

"Yes!" Kaoru exclaims, scrambling upright. "Yes! Senpai also thinks so?"

"I'm surprised that Kao-chan is surprised," Honey professes. "Actually, when Tama-chan first saw through Kyou-chan, Kyou-chan reacted in almost the same way that Kao-chan did to Haru-chan."

A cursory search of his memory produces no noteworthy events coinciding with the timeframe during which the two seniors first became acquainted. Kyouya certainly never got into fights or caused any commotion in school.

"I'm not talking about the outward reaction, Kao-chan, but in terms of how you felt. When Haru-chan first saw through Kao-chan and Hika-chan, Kao-chan's first reaction was shock. What was your second?"

"… Moved," Kaoru says straightaway. "And… and, impressed. I was moved and impressed."

Honey is already nodding away cheerfully.

"Yes, Kao-chan. Both you and Kyou-chan found something unexpected. It had enough personal significance to make Kao-chan and Kyou-chan receptive. In Kyou-chan's case, Kyou-chan believes in his inherent self-worth, so the fact that Tama-chan managed to move him at all obliges Kyou-chan to be impressed with Tama-chan. To Kyou-chan, and to Kao-chan, Tama-chan and Haru-chan achieved the impossible. There's a question that's been pestering Kao-chan," he deduces astutely. As though extracting the words straight from his junior's mind, Honey gives them form and expression: "'Why is it that, even though I think I read Kyouya-senpai quite well, we aren't as close as I'd like?' The answer, obviously, is that being able to read Kyou-chan is not very important at all, Kao-chan."

In a flash, Kaoru gets it.

He attempts to convey his understanding in a series of words, mangled and unfinished "_ohh_s", "_right_s" and "_of course_s".

"And that is Haruhi and Tono's real power," Kaoru finishes on behalf of his senior. "The ability to bridge that last gap. The ability to tell Kyouya-senpai… to tell Hikaru and I that we've been seen through."

Honey beams at him. "Full marks, Kao-chan."

That's not the only paradigm-shifting revelation that Kaoru is experiencing – previously, he found it more than a little difficult to reconcile the knowledge that his three very wise seniors, Honey, Mori and Kyouya, could have possibly been bested in their observational and analytical skill, whether combined or separate.

Indubitably, in their daily interactions in or outside club, the three seniors have repeatedly demonstrated a thorough understanding of him, his needs, his wants, his motivations. In some areas, such as upbringing and society, they probably have a better grasp of the twins than even Haruhi does. Their acumen does not pale in comparison to Tamaki's or Haruhi's, and rather likely trumps theirs, to be honest – comically enough, it might be Tamaki's and Haruhi's characteristic bluntness in social situations that led to the breakthroughs, and not because those two had made some particularly ground-breaking discovery.

It is now that Kaoru appreciates the depth of their insight, the many layers of a debt of kindness that he had not known he'd owed. It is not merely about figuring out their true natures, but also discerning the way to protect them, and having the decency to do so; the acceptance that they are not the right person, and the patience to wait for said right people.

What does one do? How should a person respond? Kaoru doesn't think he's ever felt more humbled in his life.

"I've wanted to tell Kao-chan this since I realised that Kao-chan was struggling," Honey says, re-establishing the sort of open, welcoming and familiar physical contact that Kaoru likes best. "That Kao-chan really isn't alone. I've wanted Tama-chan's power too, to reach out, to cause change. To convince Chika."

Kaoru snaps his head up at that startling honesty, a simple sentence that is, in truth, a bundle of small confessions.

"Most of all, I wanted Kao-chan to know that, president or not, Kao-chan is loveable to all of us, and I don't believe Kao-chan is lacking anything."

The lump in Kaoru's throat is starting to hurt; he swallows once, twice – his shoes are the only things he can bear to look at, and he must have chewed through his bottom lip though the stinging feeling is coming from the vicinity of his chest…

Yet his gratitude is overwhelming, and he is fiercely seized by the desire to return some of the graciousness and comfort that have been gifted to him today. Voice trembling awfully, he injects all of his sincerity into the one assurance he knows he can give, "You are a worthy Haninozuka heir, senpai."

His senior is quiet, and Kaoru cannot decipher it.

Then, "No, I was thinking I could convince Chika that it's okay to like cute things."

Having lost his equilibrium, Kaoru takes several moments to absorb his senior's reply. He _stares_, and hesitantly stutters, "Uh, senpai, your priorities…" while remaining utterly unable to decide if Honey is joking or not, until a crack shows in Honey's composure – laughter escapes him in a huff, and the both of them become consumed by hysterics, their bellies aching with the effort.

They try to calm down several times, largely unsuccessfully as one of them would provoke the other back into laughter. As they gasp for breath, Kaoru studies his beloved Honey-senpai through blurry vision, and thinks his heart might burst at the seams from feeling so full.

He finds himself fervently wishing that Honey will consent to taking himself apart more often, to be _this_ Honey more often. Noticeably more dangerous, with tantalizing hints of a sharper, shrewder personality and devastatingly penetrating intuition – are these still only the tip of the iceberg?

Kaoru no longer wants to know a Honey who is harmless, or a Honey who inspires fear by the act of waking up. No, he wants to know the nuances in between, he wants to scrape at the fabled split personality and unearth the latent power buried beneath.

"We should be getting back, Kao-chan. Takashi and Hika-chan will worry if we're gone for too long," Honey reminds him as he stands up briskly and leads the way out.

Kaoru walks behind unhurriedly, and he stops suddenly when a thought strikes him. Honey turns back to face him, mildly puzzled.

Not bothering to beat around the bush, Kaoru jumps directly to his inquiry. "Honey-senpai, how long have you and Mori-senpai been able to tell us apart?"

Honey's eyelids fall half shut in contemplation, closely measuring and gauging Kaoru.

"It's fine, senpai. I can handle it now. I want to know," Kaoru asserts earnestly.

A small smile plays around Honey's lips. "Two months after we were first introduced."

Kaoru's mouth drops open involuntarily, forming a little 'o'. He is about to yelp something to the effect of "you took even less time than Kyouya-senpai!" when his brain thankfully kicks in and restrains his tongue.

Briefly he wonders if it is a case of two heads being better than one… a look at that pair of too-brilliant eyes is sufficient to dispel that theory. Kaoru's instincts are shouting that both Honey and Mori managed it on their own, and he's frankly positive that the two eldest seniors saw fit to let Kyouya come to his conclusions in his own time.

He says, "Okay."

Although the emotions that accompanied the feats performed by Haruhi and Tamaki cannot be replicated, Kaoru nonetheless registers a detached awe – Honey has done everything right, and how can that be any less potent?

"I think, senpai," Kaoru continues, "You have a lot more of Tono's power than you give yourself credit for."

"I could say the same to you, Kao-chan," Honey comes right back at him.

Kaoru laughs somewhat haltingly. "I'm not that ambitious, Honey-senpai. I just want the six of you."

And as uncomplicated as that, wholly unlooked-for, the truth is out.

"Then Kao-chan knows what to do, ne? In martial arts, when an attack fails to take down the opponent's defences, you switch tactics. The main issue facing Kao-chan is that Kyou-chan already knows that Kao-chan is clever and observant, so Kao-chan can't pretend to be endearingly clueless. Kao-chan will need to think of a strategy to catch Kyou-chan without making Kyou-chan feel trapped."

Kaoru snorts. "That's not possible, senpai!"

"It's not impossible, it just needs imagination. And Kao-chan has plenty of that, doesn't he?"

Rosy pink blossoms dancing spiritedly around his person, Honey's broad smile puts angels to shame with its radiance.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Change for dinner, boys." Their father waves them upstairs as soon as they arrive home to be met by too many Hitachiins under one roof than is strictly advisable.

Kazuha passes them in the hallway and pinches them on the cheeks in a decidedly un-grandmotherly fashion, displaying the devious smirk that seems constantly unnoticed by everyone else but the twins. Hikaru tries to make her trip by accidentally-on-purpose snagging her ugly kimono on his studded watch and the fabric actually rips, leaving the twins in a mixed state of alarm and satisfaction.

With a sinister eyebrow curved upwards, the demon lady returns to her room to replace her dress while escorted by her husband, a role model for ninjas.

They are in the midst of congratulating themselves when a flurry of energy bowls them over.

"Outfits on the bed!" their mother yells, propelling them into their room by bodily force and slamming the door behind her as she scurries away to the veritable explosion of noise that is emanating from the main dining hall.

They primp and preen to uphold their mother's illustrious reputation, and by the time they exit their room, the grand hall is packed with the rest of the extended family, with more entering through the great double doors.

"Oh man," Hikaru groans, stuffing one hand into the trouser pocket of his perfectly creased bottle-green velvet suit and using the other to prop himself against the parapet lazily. His pearl white silk shirt shimmers where it catches the light from the crystal chandelier, exquisitely accessorised with a cravat of fine champagne-gold brocade and an emerald ring the size of a postage stamp.

It might be rather narcissistic since they're identical, but _damn Hikaru is hot_.

"Now, I did say that we'd be having dinner with the family." Yuzuha materialises behind them, the tiniest strain of admonishment prickling their skin disagreeably. "My babies, you both look marvellous."

"I see we have vastly differing interpretations of 'family', Mother," Kaoru tells her, rather tetchy at this unannounced big event. Usually the twins adore parties, planned or otherwise, but their enjoyment of these parties is dependent on the attendees, and Kaoru has already spotted some people that he'd sooner call enemies than family.

"I thought you said '_grandparents_'," Hikaru grumbles.

"Other family members have turned up," their mother explains shortly. Upon examination, Kaoru observes that she appears a little tense around the jaw; before he can ask about it discreetly, they are joined by their grandmother, who is resplendent in the most elegant kimono Kaoru has ever seen.

So the family is dressed to kill. Nothing out of the ordinary there.

"Yuzuha," their grandmother says imperiously, her bearing incomparably regal as she makes her way down the staircase, supported by her husband like a dowager empress of old. Yuzuha rains several more kisses upon them before chasing after her mother.

His parents seemed happier in the morning, Kaoru reflects privately.

An arm braces against each of the twins' backs, gathering them up and gently pushing them forward. Their father's deep voice sounds softly in their ears, "Let's go."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Schmoozing comes easily and fluently when one entertains for a living.

Hikaru and Kaoru fall into their routine, sans incest elements for propriety's sake, and by the last course they have racked up the general good favour of approximately eighty percent of the extended family.

The accomplishment is less remarkable than it sounds. Of that eighty percent, most are not intimately acquainted with the core of the family, which means that they've retained their geniality and healthy appreciation for the… quirks and originality of Kaoru's immediate relations. The remainder of the twenty percent are people who will never be convinced of the twins' goodness, like the aunt who (tried to) raise them (extremely unsuccessfully, in Kaoru's opinion), or they are the distant relations who harbour personal vendettas because of the core family's comparative status and wealth.

_Ding-ding-ding-ding!_

The attention of the table is diverted by the clear tinkling of a bell held in the right hand of Kaoru's mother.

"Thank you all for joining us tonight," Yuzuha launches into her speech with artful poise. "Seems that us Hitachiins are truly incapable of hosting low-key affairs."

Her sentiment is greeted by a considerable roar of fiendish laughter and rowdy applause.

"The more the merrier!" Ren's husband claps enthusiastically.

"Hear, hear!"

Hikaru sends a mental poke his way to indicate a bunch of conspicuously more subdued people – even after all this time, their father's very proper Japanese side of the family has retained their faint apprehension at this lack of decorum, although Kaoru knows that they are incredibly fond of their daughter- or sister-in-law.

They are intimidated by Kazuha, however, and the twins' repeated allegations of their maternal grandmother's nefarious nature must not have lent them any sense of peace.

"More is definitely merrier!" Yuzuha echoes. "Hence, Yasuhiro and I are delighted to announce that we are expecting."

A hush falls upon the seated crowd.

_WHAA-AA-AAAT_, Hikaru yowls down their twin channel.

Someone around the massive table chokes on their dessert.

To describe them as gobsmacked is putting it lightly. Kaoru and his brother are _seventeen_! That is not an age at which normal people should expect to gain siblings!

A riot erupts; in the joyous chaos, there's a family who isn't particularly thrilled about the news, admirably though they hide it. Kaoru nudges Hikaru and turns to the most quick-witted person from whom to take his cues – sure as can be, Kazuha has her gaze fixed firmly on her younger sister and brother-in-law.

Yuzuha and Yasuhiro are heartily accepting well-wishes from the others. To an ordinary viewer it may seem that their attentions are altogether occupied, yet Kaoru realises that they are adeptly avoiding Yuzuha's cousins, and then accepting the most minimal of compliments from them.

_Later_, Kaoru says to Hikaru. They kiss and hug their parents, permit themselves to be annoyed at being kept in the dark, and resolve to spy on their elders after the guests depart.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Ow!"

"Shhh!"

Hikaru glares at his twin. _If you want me to be quiet, don't step on my fingers!_

_If you don't want me to step on your fingers, crawl slower!_

Kaoru makes to turn his head back to the front when he feels a smarting sensation on his bottom; evidently, Hikaru had decided to pinch the nearest accessible surface on his brother's body. Reflexively, Kaoru jabs his foot backwards and it makes contact with its unfortunate target.

They're navigating the house using the hidden passageways that they used to use as pesky young troublemakers. Where once they could get from one room to another with utmost dexterity, abandoning the adults to their befuddlement at the vanishing acts, they've now outgrown their secret maze.

'Get a move on," Hikaru growls, clasping his arm where Kaoru'd kicked him. "If we miss their conversation it'll be your fault."

Arranging his body to squeeze through a stooped doorway, Kaoru emerges into a crevice that offers a prime view of the interior of the library, the best room in the mansion to have conversations in confidence. The intimacy can be enhanced by dimming the lighting and selecting the seats in the corner, obscured by heavy shelves and protected by soundproofed walls.

The clock in the grand hall chimes two o'clock through the still night. Pregnant women shouldn't be keeping late hours, but there reclines their mother in the plushest chaise with one hand held between both of her husband's.

"Yuzuha," the twins' grandfather advises, "you should go to sleep. Your mother will take care of this."

"Quite right, dear," their smitten father says, reaching over to pull his wife's sleeping robe more snugly across her chest. His hair is damp from his bath before, as is their mother's.

Yuzuha sighs. "Am I being selfish?"

Kazuha lets out a rude sound that could have been made by Hikaru in one of his foulest moods. "My parents wanted me to have the ikebana school. I only have you, my daughter. You are entitled to want your children to inherit the school."

"But my boys love fashion, so Aunt Midori was hoping you'd name her grandchil – "

"If my sister or your cousins came to any premature assumptions about _my_ successors," Kazuha begins archly, pausing in the act of sipping her flower tea, "then they have only themselves to blame."

"They've had their eye on it for a long time, Mother. And I didn't stop them because I didn't think I'd have any more children."

Their grandmother flaps a hand dismissively. "The way they rushed here today was disgraceful. Flimsy excuse of a gift! Hikaru and Kaoru shouldn't have to choose a career as a favour to me; and you, my Yuzuha, shouldn't have to be pressured into giving up your right to take over the school."

She sets the teacup down on the low table and rises, finality etched into her posture. "This is my decision: I will hold on to the school until we've had the chance to decide whether your youngest has the interest and aptitude for ikebana."

"Even I think it's a bit much to make them wait for fifteen or twenty years, Mother," Yuzuha says wryly.

"Nonsense. I still have decades left in me," the matriarch says confidently. "They'll be waiting for fifteen or twenty years anyway."

At her comments, their grandfather presses his lips together to withhold a chuckle.

"Thank you, Mother." Yuzuha and Yasuhiro bow deeply towards her. "We're sorry that it'll make you look bad."

"Not as bad as their gift would have made me look," she mutters disgruntledly as she sweeps out.

Kaoru sees his mother turn inquisitively towards his grandfather.

"I'm afraid," comes the regretful reply, "that your children wrecked the kimono."

"Thank good – I mean, _oh no_. Is Mother upset?"

"Not at all." Their grandfather yawns widely. "Kazuha thought it was hideous. She was determined that they should be unable to force her to wear it."

The adults titter mischievously and retire to bed, leaving Hikaru to rail indignantly about being played by the evilest villain to walk the earth.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

For the second successive morning, the twins wake at an unholy hour.

"Ugghh…" Kaoru moans piteously and burrows into his blankets when Hikaru flicks the lights on. He is plagued with the misfortune of having the most pigheaded twin in the universe, and he proceeds to lodge his complaint with whichever deity might be listening in.

"Yeah, yeah, I guess that means you wouldn't bawl like a baby because you were separated from me for a second."

"I _was_ a baby!" Kaoru scowls irritably. "And you cried too!"

Hikaru rolls his eyes. "Good, you're up. If we don't make our way to Tono's house in half an hour or less, we'd basically have to go straight to school."

Unwilling to endure this again, Kaoru wills himself upright and readies himself for what he hopes will be an uneventful day.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Hikaru! Kaoru!" Tamaki shoots up from his chair in astonishment, breakfast utensils clattering on the table.

"Morning, Tono."

The three of them shuffle around awkwardly, hemming and hawing; predictably, Tamaki breaks the silence.

"Are the both of you okay? I – I wanted to visit you yesterday but Kyouya said…"

Hikaru blurts out, "I'm sorry," concomitantly with Kaoru's, "Are _you_ okay?"

"I'm sorry too!" Tamaki bursts into tears and rushes at them with arms a-flailing. "I was so worried!"

When Tamaki says that he's been worried, he really has been. In a way that normal people cannot begin to imagine. He has this saving people thing where he needs to be in the physical presence of those that he is concerned about, and he'd fly to the moon and beyond to make that happen because he's just… he's just so idiotically pure.

Kaoru drops his head onto one of Tamaki's shoulders, wondering why Tamaki has to be so excruciatingly sincere about _everything_, pointless or useless or not, and how is it that his heart hasn't been blasted apart by other people's callousness and ignorance.

It rends Kaoru's own heart to _think_ of feeling the emotions that Tamaki has actually felt, and Kaoru is smart enough to know that past a certain point, the miracle is not that people can love, but that people _still_ love.

Tamaki is the reason Kaoru gets murderous when he hears schoolmates calling the hosts fake; maybe the rest of them are from time to time but Tamaki alone should be exempt from this disparagement. Well, Haruhi and Tamaki. Kaoru is far from the only one who holds this sentiment – non-club-members do not know that this casual insult is one of the most affecting to the club, since everyone except Tamaki and Haruhi takes it personally as an affront to the two of them despite knowing better. When simmering with veiled fury, Kyouya has the tendency to swipe more items than usual to auction off, and weeks will pass without incident until some calamity befalls the originator of the remarks entirely by accident.

Hikaru's head is perched on Tamaki's other shoulder, his features drawn. Kaoru knows that his twin honestly feels terrible and guilty about it all – perhaps it is an aftereffect of the talk he had with Honey yesterday, but Kaoru is sensing his limitations, painful though the knowledge is to bear. This is Tamaki's and Hikaru's problem, and Kaoru isn't the one who can dictate when and how things will work out.

Again he feels that little pang of powerlessness and – yes, envy.

Tamaki's beautiful musician fingers curl around the tendrils of Kaoru's hair at the nape of his neck at this very moment and Kaoru _feels_ something that cannot be explained by words.

A profound warmth.

Kaoru knows that Tamaki is no Kyouya or Honey; it was a coincidence that Tamaki drew Kaoru closer to himself just when Kaoru was feeling poor. It's often difficult to pinpoint how much Tamaki actually knows and when he's just winging it. Kaoru has never known someone who simultaneously knows so much and so little at the same time, so wise and yet so much the fool; it keeps him perpetually off guard.

When he looks up, Tamaki has water pooling in his eyes and his characteristic grin plastered on – every inch of him genuinely, wholeheartedly overjoyed to have them there with him; his face is open and his manner magnanimous, and Kaoru suspects that this is exactly it, because Tamaki may not always have the capacity or inclination to investigate the roots of people's problems but he always makes people feel better.

At the end of the day, that's what people are really searching for.

They pull apart, all three of them, sniffling and laughing. Hikaru and Kaoru hadn't bothered to have their morning meal because they knew that Tamaki would coerce them into joining him; when Hikaru settles down across from Tamaki, he's brighter and more relaxed than before.

Kaoru, too, is changed from before.

The truth is, Tamaki marks a before and an after in the twins' lives.

"We're going to be big brothers!" Hikaru bursts out excitedly, immediately, and Kaoru recognises that his twin wanted to share this with Tamaki first.

"Aaaaugh!" Tamaki squeals ecstatically like he's the one getting a new sibling. He and Hikaru babble crazily over the future Hitachiin, deciding on any number of ridiculous things that they're going to do with and to a child, and Kaoru is doing his utmost to participate, only he's on the cusp of an epiphany…

As he watches Tamaki elicit an answering warmth from Hikaru, he _understands_ what it is that Kyouya wants – needs – from his best friend.

These past months at Kyouya's house have enabled Kaoru to construct an image of the person Kyouya was and would have become had his life not been invaded by Tamaki. Though Kyouya is cold by nature from his innate personality and his family environment, Kaoru deeply intuits that he doesn't want to be cold in person. Before he met Tamaki, he must have had no way to bridge the gulf of difference between his nature and his person. Tamaki, then, is the sort of person that Kyouya knows he will never be, and whatever Kyouya does, he wants to preserve the warmth Tamaki has.

That's why whenever Kyouya thinks that Tamaki is exhibiting his 'warm' traits, Kyouya defers to him to the point of driving the club penniless on countless occasions for excessive events, and also why he reacts unforgivingly and punishingly towards people and situations that threaten Tamaki's ability to stay spirited and full of life.

"Kaoru!" Tamaki says, likely because he's been zoning out for a while. "Finish your eggs, we have to go to school!"

Chatting animatedly, the twins head over to their car with Tamaki's arms slung over them affectionately. In the course of the journey to the academy, Tamaki carves out at least five more opportunities to dispense his legendary hugs, almost as if he doesn't want them to go without.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

**English Paper  
><strong>常陸院 馨 Hitachiin Kaoru - 98/100

It is the highest mark in their year level for the October Midterms.

Kaoru can't help but wish he was still second place. He says nothing of it, conscious of how stupid he'd seem.

At lunch, Hikaru advertises Kaoru's marks to Tamaki and Kyouya when the seniors seek them out. Tamaki heaps praise on him in between mouthfuls of rice, and Kyouya is Kyouya, reinforcing that they know him and he has nowhere to hide.

Indeed the marks are great. His seniors are telling him so in their own way, and Kaoru believes them.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Kaoru transfers his school bag to his other hand as he watches the car door shield his two third year seniors from sight. The seniors are headed to Kyouya's house to change into their business suits, then they're off to chair the meeting with their executive team.

Beside him, Hikaru is smirking at smatterings of curious onlookers who're trying none-too-subtly to glimpse their two friends, who are for all intents and purposes the most influential individuals of the student population. Snide amusement aside, Hikaru's soul feels aglow with something – pride. Kaoru's twin is thinking that their seniors are pretty awesome, and yeah, so is Kaoru.

"Oi, Tono," Hikaru says as he raps on the jet black window. It rolls down soundlessly. "Sure you wanna bring breakfast for me tomorrow? Don't trouble yourself if you get home too late today. It's not like Mori-senpai lets me starve."

"Yes!" Tamaki insists. "I found these commoner waffles! You said you'd teach me how to mix maple syrup and strawberry syrup and chocolate – "

"You were going to bring waffles?!" Hikaru grieves, throwing his head backwards forlornly. "I can't! Mori-senpai says I can't eat sweets after training! Only proper food like fish and beans!"

From the corner of his vision, Kaoru sees Kyouya's lips twitch.

"Then I'll bring commoner beans! Did you know that commoners buy frozen beans out of the pods?"

"Why don't you allow Mori-senpai to serve up a nutritious menu instead, Tamaki? Don't sabotage other people's efforts," Kyouya chides absently while perusing some charts and statistics on his iPad.

Crushed by the setback, Tamaki declares that he will join Hikaru for his training to earn his meal. Hikaru tells him that he'll be a nuisance if he can't keep up with Mori's regime and Tamaki takes exception to the insinuation that he is unfit, and they spiral into a tangent about their stamina and muscle size.

"I expect that we will be done by eight thirty at the latest, which allows plenty of time for Tamaki to obtain his required amount of sleep before your athletic showdown at dawn," Kyouya says coolly, flicking a look at Kaoru over the top of his spectacles.

Pleased, Kaoru dips his head to signal his assent to the invitation.

"That is, if we might kindly be permitted to leave now."

The terrifically courteous request, delivered with the trademark Kyouya smile, induces Tamaki and Hikaru to quake in their designer school shoes. Hikaru snatches his hands away from where they'd been examining Tamaki's biceps and springs back into position on Kaoru's left.

Being on this side of the fence is nothing short of hilarious.

"See you tomorrooooow!" Tamaki hollers.

Hikaru ducks his head and scratches it lightly, gratified and unable to suppress it. "Huh."

Yes, Kaoru has picked up on it too – that Tamaki is keener than usual to accompany Hikaru. Way, way overdue, it's a fantastic thing for them to reinstate the balance of their friendship in the wake of Haruhi. Love and friendship can definitely co-exist.

"Atelier?" Hikaru asks as they get into the back of their limo.

"Yeah."

"Hey, Kaoru," Hikaru says, sidling up close enough for his nose to graze Kaoru's jaw once they have privacy. "Mori-senpai gave the go-ahead for me to apply for permission."

It takes a couple of beats for Kaoru to figure out what his twin is talking about, and when he does he basically screams, "When?!"

Hikaru falls back onto the leather seats and laughs, dizzy with euphoria at his accomplishment. "Lunch! After I messaged him to tell him about our new sibling!"

"And you waited s – god, Hikaru! Why didn't you tell me?!" Exasperated, Kaoru half climbs onto his brother to make his demands. "Idiot. Why didn't you!"

"'Cos you were being even more of an idiot," Hikaru retorts. "Last year, the highest anyone ever got in any second-year English exam was 96 and that was Kyouya-senpai. Who – let me remind you, my increasingly dunderheaded twin – was happy for you."

"Ohh," Kaoru says coquettishly, "so you were being thoughtful and considerate to me?"

"We were _all _being thoughtful and considerate to you, my dear Kaoru," Hikaru replies with the straightest face he can summon. It does not last long before he cracks up.

He might be making a big joke out of it, but Kaoru knows the truth when he hears it. Touched, he leans in and kisses Hikaru.

"Thank you," he whispers.

"It makes me wanna punch you," Hikaru informs him with a lopsided grin, then presses another hard kiss to Kaoru's lips, "when you don't see how much the rest of us want you to be happy."

"Believe me, I know," Kaoru assures him, and rests his body against Hikaru's contentedly.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Kaoru is bent over his flat patterns in an unconvincing attempt to appear busy. In fact, he is eavesdropping on the conversation between the boss and her eldest son. Sitting across from him, Ren is similarly engaged in this covert activity – she might be getting another student soon.

Their academy expressly prohibits students from working in part time jobs in school rule #9. After receiving Mori's text message, Hikaru had gone to collect an exemption form, the only way to circumvent the rule. Parental consent is required and the exemption is mainly given to last-year students, although the twins have successfully applied for it for previous modelling stints. Kaoru, Kyouya and Tamaki are currently on the long term license, authorising them to work alongside study.

Through the glass, Hitachiin Yuzuha is assessing a potential successor. Her entire office is waiting with bated breath.

Kaoru has to applaud his brother's courage and zero hesitation; he himself would have chosen to wait till they were at home. The staff is anticipatory about Hikaru because Hikaru embodies the part of Yuzuha that they see, that they know. To them she is visionary, enterprising, extravagant and tough as nails.

Creative souls often have a stronger ability to discern the personalities of others; since Chikako, Kaoru has conjectured about the possibility that other employees may have drawn inferences about the twins based on hunches and gut feelings. Presumptively, this makes Hikaru the impulsive, wilder, _outrageous_ one in an industry where lunacy and audacity are sought after and celebrated.

It's not that Kaoru isn't brassy, but that he is _less_.

Those closer to Yuzuha, those who know her vulnerability, might postulate that Kaoru is the exemplification of that. Kaoru is her generosity, her rationality, her sobriety, her fear of failure. He is the part of her that thinks of others' welfare, that's paradoxically trapped by romance and innocently dependent on whimsical fairy tales to survive.

It doesn't keep him awake at night, for in these Kaoru is sure:

The success of the House of Hitachiin, S.A. originated from this precise combination of his mother's qualities. Neither half can be dispensed with.

Surer still he is of his brother. Hikaru isn't a conceited, unfeeling asshole. They aren't one-dimensional creatures nor are they the sum of their mother's parts.

Of most personal relevance is probably this: Kaoru thinks he has strength. He doesn't need to be the strongest in order to be strong, and he doesn't have to be the boldest in order to be brave. He thinks of Honey and Mori, their persistence and their forbearance – and he finds in himself the promise of mettle.

And when Hikaru says, "Kaoru, mum wants you to show her your drafts", when their fingers brush as they pass one another, when the news spreads like wildfire that both heirs-in-waiting have now been installed in the company, Kaoru takes a step closer to his dream.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The twins get to knock off at six because of an office party held for Yuzuha by her staff. On fashion websites and forums, her pregnancy is _the_ hot topic, and her staff wants to be first in line to find out the details.

Kaoru excuses himself despite being welcome to stay. He has a duty to fulfill and something to find out.

Hikaru'd tagged along after spending those two hours getting a start on creating and compiling his portfolio. He hasn't been assigned to any instructor yet, so he'd been working by himself, occasionally darting surreptitious glances at Kaoru.

They pull up beside the kerb in a peasant part of town and a phone call later they are joined by a flawlessly made-up Ranka, from whom Kaoru receives a doting, womanly kiss. Kaoru is going with Ranka to visit Misuzu and Misuzu's friend at the hospital; it'd been an uphill battle getting Ranka to agree because Ranka didn't think that Kaoru should have to witness "this sort of adults' thing", and it was only the underhanded reminders that Ranka wouldn't get to work on time if he wasn't chauffeured and that he needed to support Haruhi financially that ultimately persuaded him.

"Waaa!" Ranka gushes enviously. "I wish I could have given my Haruhi a sibling! Your mother must have had you two when she was very young!"

Hikaru has taken to the habit of keeping everyone up to date about the Hitachiins' headline story, luckily sparing Kaoru from having to buoy Ranka's mood.

"Eh, I guess," Hikaru says offhandedly. "I mean, she was twenty-one. Didn't Ranka-san have Haruhi at nineteen? Our mother married our father when she was nineteen."

"Ahhh, it couldn't be helped. My Kotoko was already pregnant when we got married, so actually I married when I was nineteen too! You know how it's like when people are in love." Giggling reminiscently, Ranka adds, "If my Kotoko was still alive, I bet our relationship would be as good as your parents!"

Kaoru coughs delicately and struggles not to laugh at Hikaru's shudder.

"Don't worry, Ranka-papa. You can become a youthful grandmother instead," Kaoru consoles him.

"Not too soon! I want to see Haruhi become a lawyer like her mother!"

Hikaru chortles. "Tono is the sort who believes in the sanctity of marriage. He might be French but he'd probably want to do things the traditional way."

It's Ranka's turn to go green.

"Noooooo!" he wails, shaking his head violently with hands over his cheeks.

Kaoru is in stitches; it's hard to get out of the car in this state. He uses Hikaru as a human crutch as they enter the hospital lobby.

The smell of sanitizers is pervasive yet oddly unoppressive – it reminds Kaoru of dinners at Kyouya's. When his senior's elder siblings are present, it clings to their clothes from a long day's work… and sometimes Kyouya himself has this smell of fresh clean linen. On the Ootoris, this smell does not translate to death or decay but professionalism of the highest standard.

Without stopping for directions, Ranka heads to the elevators and presses the button that takes them to the floor where the recreational facilities are located. He then proceeds to try to make them wait for him in the cafeteria.

"No," Kaoru repeats, causing Hikaru to look askance at his pushiness.

_Leave it, Kaoru._

"Papa-san wouldn't make Haruhi wait here."

"I would!" Ranka exhales, rather put out. "I really would, Kaoru-kun."

_Kaoru, seriously, just leave it._

Damned if Kaoru can admit openly why he so enormously wants to go. He wants to stare at Ranka, to will him to understand, and he can't because the person who reads Kaoru best in the world is standing right beside him.

"Fine," he deflates, tightly controlling his disappointment.

Ranka blinks in confusion and ambles back to the lifts.

_Ookay. What was that?_

"Nothing," Kaoru curtly shelves the subject away and walks towards the secluded inner garden.

"Hey," Hikaru barks, grabbing his arm. A ticked off Hikaru is a blunt Hikaru. "You know that Haruhi doesn't need you to become a surrogate son for her father, right?"

"Yes," Kaoru says, consciously gentling his voice. "Sorry."

He doesn't say, "It's not that", or "It's something else". It would be a mistake to discuss the real issue at this time, at this place.

Hikaru releases his hold and they plop down wearily on a wooden bench beside the koi pond, already feeling bored.

"D'you think mum'll assign us to different teachers?"

"Who knows. O-Ren-san seems to think you'll be her student too."

"Do you want that? Or would you prefer some other arrangement?"

Kaoru ponders his next words carefully. "I think we'll benefit from diversifying our skill base."

"God, you sound like Kyouya-senpai."

A surprised chuckle escapes Kaoru. "I'm saying, the same teacher will teach the same set of skills and, well… I don't think your learning style is compatible with O-Ren-san's teaching style."

"Yeah!" Hikaru harumphs. "The studio was worse than a graveyard at night! If not for the fact that I know your style so well, I would've thought O-Ren-san wasn't teaching you anything!"

"She lets me go out of the office to daydream and take photos as and when I like," Kaoru defends his mentor, "and she always asks for the story behind my aesthetic."

"Perfect teacher for you, then," Hikaru confirms. "Oh, Mother is _good_."

"Exactly. Probably means she'll find someone who doesn't mind being engulfed by hurricanes to tutor you," Kaoru suggests, maintaining a cordially meditative tone. "Oh, no, wait, she might have to include warnings about avalanches of fabric, volcanic eruptions of inspiration, droughts of books from the shared library… Best to search for a thrill-seeker equipped to deal with natural disasters of varying – "

It's Kaoru's favourite trick to use on his brother. With a 50% success rate, if one properly regulates one's intonation, one can score a great number of points against Hikaru before he realises and retaliates.

"Agh! Stop!" Kaoru wriggles futilely after being tackled.

"Are you receiving lessons on how to be a superior jerk from Kyouya-senpai?" Hikaru demands."Is that what's happening? 'Cos you're going to find yourself banned from associating one-on-one with senpai."

They're fortunate that it is dinner time and most patients are back in their wards, or their roughhousing would have garnered criticism.

Flat on his back and breathless with laughter, Kaoru closes his eyes. He doesn't have the slightest inclination to fight Hikaru off. "Stop blaming senpai. I've been doing this to you since we were five."

"And Haruhi thinks I'm the meaner twin," Hikaru mutters balefully, earning a smirk in return. "At least Mori-senpai makes me a better person, unlike your Kyouya-senpai."

"Mori-senpai makes _everyone_ better people. Anyway, you owe plenty of your personal development to Kyouya-senpai too, whether you know it or not."

"There's no club without Kyouya-senpai, I know."

Kaoru pushes himself up passionately, needing to impart to his twin the gravity of their debt. "No – no, it's more than that, Hikaru. We can't even begin to – there's no _us_ without those four seniors."

"I was joking, you know that right? Of course I like Kyouya-senpai, why else would I be organising a birthday party for him?"

"Oh! Have you and Honey-senpai gotten a start on that? Kyouya-senpai doesn't want anything fancy, what with finals and Ootori Pharmaceuticals and all."

Cackling in a way that makes the hairs on the back of Kaoru's neck stand up, Hikaru confides that "Mori-senpai said something that gave us the _craziest_ idea, it's absolutely_ genius_ – "

"Woah, woah! Kyouya-senpai doesn't like crazy!"

The response Kaoru gets isn't "don't worry, it's a good crazy!" or "nah, it's not that crazy!", hopefully conveyed with the requisite amount of lucidity and overall awareness to restore Kaoru's confidence in his twin's soundness of mind.

No. His suicidal twin says, "Tough. Senpai's getting this for his birthday."

Kaoru gawks, bearing an uncanny resemblance to the koi fish.

"Look, Kaoru!" Hikaru jibes, pointing to the pond, "You've gained several more identical brothers!"

Dignity out the window, Kaoru lands a thwack on his brother's head and jumps up. "Come on. I'm going to check you into the hospital while we're here, because if _I_ don't, _Kyouya-senpai_ will."

"It'll be fine!" Hikaru chirps blithely. "Honey-senpai's all for it! Okay, tell you what – Mori-senpai and I are gonna discuss it with Tono tomorrow. If the three of them agree, you _know_ it's a good idea. Besides, Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai will be there to deflect most of Kyouya-senpai's wrath. I mean, assuming Kyouya-senpai gets angry in the first place, which he really won't."

"Yeeaaaah," Kaoru quibbles. "See, the problem is what happens _after_ the party. By virtue of their senpainess, Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai are free from Kyouya-senpai's vengeance. We aren't."

"Scaredy-cat. And it's not a party, it's a sleepover."

"A sleep – oh my god, Hikaru. You want to piss him off for more than a day?"

The meaner twin's face is illuminated with delirious depravity. "_A whole weekend!_"

"I want no part of this," Kaoru disavows on the spot.

"You don't even know what 'this' is," Hikaru challenges.

"Thank god for small mercies. I'm completely irreproachable. When Mother gives birth, I'll make sure to tell our new sibling stories about his or her eldest brother's ignominious death as a cautionary tale."

Hikaru laughs it off, devil-may-care. "Have more faith in Mori-senpai. He's the one working out the chinks in the plan. It will work, Kaoru. Mori-senpai, he… "

Trailing off, Hikaru mutely gives a one-shouldered shrug.

"… What?" Kaoru prompts curiously, watching his brother's Adam's apple bob up and down.

"He… gets it. You know, understands. Us. Things. I think he… Uh, about Haruhi… Just. Our senpais always know a lot more than they let on. Wait, maybe it's just that I'm slow. D'you know things that you aren't telling me?"

"Erm," Kaoru says nervously. "Like what sorts of things?"

"I don't know, you tell me!"

"Isn't Mori-senpai telling you what you need to know?"

Hikaru slouches over. "Some things, yeah. Slowly."

"Then we should follow Mori-senpai's timing," Kaoru decides. "Or if we want to talk more about this, we should do it at home."

One or two patients have begun filtering into the inner garden for a relaxing stroll after their meal. A teenage girl with a cast on her leg limps past them and greets a middle-aged lady who has gone bald from chemotherapy. A grey-haired man, very thin, very sick and heavily wrinkled by hardship, brings his wheelchair to a stop about a metre away from the twins – there is a packet of pea-sized pellets on the blanket draped over his lap. He smiles benignly at Kaoru and Hikaru before tossing the reddish-brown food into the pond; Kaoru guesses that he must be a long-term patient for the koi seem to recognise him.

_Home_, Hikaru chooses.

Kaoru nods accommodatingly.

_Ne, Kaoru, you never said where you and Honey-senpai disappeared to on Sunday. Honey-senpai said something to me the other day, I don't know if it means what I think it means or if I'm reading too much into it, and if it means what I think it – _

The ring and rattle of a cell phone cuts Hikaru off.

"Hello? Ah, Mori-senpai? Yeah. Uh huh, I have. She said yes! Yeah…"

Kaoru tunes out of their conversation and focuses on the brightly-coloured fish and the fluid movements of their sinuous bodies. He is idly drifting through the possibility of a scaly, form-fitting iridescent dress when he spots the lanky young woman at the same time she notices him.

Like him, Hacker-san does a commendable imitation of a carp's gobbling mouth.

Recovering first, Kaoru winks at her but does not make any other outward indications of their acquaintance. Of all the places to meet, it's in 'enemy territory'.

The thought brings a sudden chill.

What is Hacker-san doing in an Ootori hospital? She can't be allied with Yuuichi or something, can she?

Hacker-san is unmistakeably stunned to see him, and there's no undercurrent of 'oh shit, I've been careless'. Either she should be making a living as a professional actor, or Kaoru is correct in believing that he's a passable judge of character.

Sure she'd furnished him with details of her background. However, as Kaoru told his dad, he senses that it's a combination of truth and lies, almost as though she'd tried to be honest wherever she could but couldn't exactly tell him specifics like her year of graduation if she really wanted to hide her identity. Hence, her alma mater (University of Tokyo) and degree (Bachelor of Science, Department of Information Science) are probably accurate, as is her marital status (single) and age (23 to 24-ish). Without a doubt the high school and town of birth are bogus, and she has no current place of residence to falsify since Kaoru is arranging a small flat for her as part of her wages.

It's hard playing this game of trust.

In the contractual document, her photograph is attached to bind her image to the obligations of their employment relationship. Even the family lawyers are unclear as to how it will stand up in a court of law, so they'd privately counselled Kaoru that in the event of a breach of contract by Hacker-san, they should turn her over to the official authorities to pursue a criminal prosecution for identity fraud and obtaining money by deception instead.

This lateral problem-solving is jolly good, except what Kaoru wants is talent _and_ loyalty. Through their regular emails, it's gradually apparent that they co-ordinate well together. It would be a pity to lose at this stage.

"Oh, you're here," rasps the man in the wheelchair. He's addressing Hacker-san, who's chewing on her bottom lip irately and directing a substantial amount of surly heat towards… Kaoru.

There are times where Kaoru wonders if he's letting his instinct drown his reason, and then there are times like these, when Hacker-san treads across the grass to crouch down in front of the gentleman and says tersely, "Yeah. How've you been, dad?"

It's not a lie; she must know that she's supplied Kaoru with the means to track her life history.

"Fine, fine," the old patient soothes her with the familiarity of a long-established routine. To Kaoru's eyes, he's going to kick it at any moment. To Kaoru's ears, he's a loving father who's worried about his daughter and desperately sorry to her for putting her through this ordeal.

"Let's go back to your room before you catch a cold."

"The fish haven't had their dinner," the man argues, "and old Abe-san is always trying to overhear our conversations. He still doesn't believe you're my daughter; he thinks I have a son with a girlish face, like that singer whats-his-name."

Kaoru forces himself to inhale and exhale calmly. Notwithstanding that he's behaving like Abe-san, at least out of respect he has angled his body away from them.

Hacker-san scrubs at her cheek restlessly. "I have better things to do than prove him wrong, dad."

"It wouldn't hurt to dress up a – "

"Dad!"

"I'm not saying it because I think there's anything wrong with you, Kanon. I'm saying it because it's good for you to find a companion, otherwise who will be with you when I die? Loneliness eats people alive, my stubborn daughter."

Hacker-san is visibly distressed, mostly – Kaoru reckons – as a result of his presence.

His attention is seized by a bump to his upper arm. Phone jammed against his ear, Hikaru is gesturing to him to go someplace. Kaoru acquiesces by rising to his feet and walks away without turning back, trusting Hacker-san to have enough awareness of their location and to presume that they will be conferring about it tomorrow at their designated headquarters.

"Where're we going?"

"I'm gonna head over to Mori-senpai's. Satoshi and I are helping senpai to build a pen for Piyo-chan. Come with?"

A glance at his watch leads Kaoru to refuse the offer, since he has just enough time left to drop off Ranka at work before heading over to Kyouya's. He walks his twin down to their limo, where Hikaru makes him promise that he won't go to Misuzu's friend's ward out of a misguided sense of duty.

It still really isn't about that, but whatever.

Gloomily, Kaoru re-enters the hospital complex and waits in the lift lobby, tapping one foot against the vinyl floor. Two men, one in a white doctor's robe and another in a run-of-the-mill suit, follow him into the enclosed space.

The doors slide close and, _shit_.

"Hitachiin Kaoru-sama, we mean you no harm. Please cooperate," Suit requests formally.

Robe whips out an ID card and scans it against a panel above the lift buttons to reset them. He selects the button that takes them to the eighth level of the patients' wing. In a non-threatening yet immensely constraining way, they manoeuvre him down the corridors towards the restricted access lift lobby of the tall office block, by which time the only question is which of Kyouya's family is behind this.

The elevator stops at the apex.

Kaoru's heart plummets. Bracing himself to the best of his ability, he steps out.

The front office is clinical and clean – ludicrously, harrowingly clean. Not a single item out of place and no sign of human inhabitation save the lone secretary wedged between a mirror at the far wall and a desk made of glass and shiny stainless steel. Papers and files have a bizarre way of behaving themselves in Ootori-dominated environments. They lie neatly in orderly stacks beside the shockingly monotone stationery, the world famous Ootori logo emblazoned across the letterhead.

The secretary has full view of the two straight-backed guest seats that are situated on either side of a cube made entirely out of glass. On top of the cube lies the sole item of beauty: a vase of blown glass, transparent with inky black swirls like diffused smoke, and topped with the crystal flowers from Waterford's Marc Jacobs Collection.

The flowers bear the hallmark of Kiyomi's taste. A gift from the daughter-in-law?

It seems that Suit and Robe have accomplished their mission by depositing Kaoru literally at Ootori Yoshio's door. The secretary takes over from them, tapping a switch to open the freakishly seamless outward-facing mirror and ushering Kaoru into the interior.

The room redefines Kaoru's perception of noise-insulation.

At this height, the hustle and bustle of the congested Tokyo streets is negligible. Through his association with Kyouya, Kaoru knows that Ootoris favour noiseless workspaces, but…

Surely not this extreme?!

Ootori Yoshio's pen ceases its movement.

Kaoru bows stiffly from the waist, appropriately deferential. "Ootori-sama, how do you do?"

"Sit down, Hitachiin-kun," Kyouya's father bids from behind the imposing executive desk as he resumes annotating a document.

Deftly, Kaoru lowers himself into the chair opposite and waits.

And waits.

And waits.

His carriage does not sag and he does not fidget.

This is hell.

Ootori Yoshio must want something from him, but for the life of Kaoru he cannot fathom what. Like son like father, their propensity for time economy compels them to do their own work while testing other people. To be fair, their examinees aren't always quick on the mark.

The spark of light reflected off Ootori-sama's Montblanc provides the Eureka moment.

"We're doing very well in the club," Kaoru reports. "Last week, the day before Ootori-sama came home to Japan, we had a calligraphy competition in several different languages. The winner was Izumiya Chiyo of the Izumiya family, who wrote in Japanese, Korean, English, French and Russian. Kyouya-senpai and I are discussing ideas for our future themed sessions; this Friday we are doing a steampunk cosplay and we hope to do a nautical theme on a cruise ship after final exams. Preparations are also underway for us to celebrate Kyouya-senpai's birthday with him."

"Hm, I see."

Kaoru inclines his head respectfully. "Yes."

"Is my son a good teacher?"

"The best," Kaoru vouches.

"Are you struggling with the demands of the role?" Ootori Yoshio switches the silver file for a notepad and begins to jot down his criticisms of the document in dot-point form.

"No," Kaoru answers carefully. "I am adequately supported by the people surrounding me, and Kyouya-senpai's guidance is precisely tailored to strike a balance between allowing me to reach my potential without pushing me past my limits."

"In that case, I presume you must not take your responsibilities seriously, Hitachiin-kun." Finally, the severe businessman meets Kaoru's eyes unwaveringly. "Considering that you have not taken the initiative to provide me with updates of your club activities."

"I – " Kaoru gulps, mind racing. "I'm sorry, Ootori-sama. I will strive to be more diligent."

"You accept that it was your error?" Yoshio probes.

"Yes. Kyouya-senpai entrusted it to me, but I let it slip from my memory when I was compiling my portfolio."

The man isn't buying it.

"Is that so? Kyouya has not selected an apposite candidate, nor did he follow up on your progress? I did not expect my son to lack the aptitude for personnel management."

"No!" Kaoru refutes, agitated. "No. That is…"

Oneechan taught him that the optimum way to lie is to use the truth.

"That is, I lied."

For the barest fraction of a second, something like triumph darkens Yoshio's otherwise impassive features.

" – to Kyouya-senpai. I assured senpai that I would contact Ootori-sama, though I have been putting it off because you scare me," Kaoru dissembles, wishing that he isn't actually feeling the terror he is projecting. The muscles in his back are all knotted up.

Yoshio's mouth does not curve even as he eases up on the burrowing pressure of his stare. If it wasn't for Kaoru's acquaintance with Yuuichi, he'd have missed that shadow of mirth. The guy works hard to cultivate a healthy fear in other people, why shouldn't Kaoru tell him he's succeeded?

"I see. You consider that a long-term solution to your predicament?"

_Clearly not if you're going to haul me here by brute force._

"No," Kaoru says again. "Kyouya-senpai is always on top of things; I would have had to answer to senpai eventually. I just… wanted to talk to the other parents first… get some practice… before having to be appraised by Ootori-sama."

He falters.

After a few beats, with another bow that obscures his face from Yoshio's view, he continues, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have. It was rude of me to single Ootori-sama out. Please forgive me."

It's rather a relief to stay in this position, Kaoru discovers. Thank goodness for humble bowing; how do the Westerners deal without it? Without a polite way to avert his eyes, he'd have frozen over into a solid block of ice.

"You are certain that my son had nothing to do with your neglect?" Yoshio asks impassively. "That would mean you have failed at the outset of my appraisal, Hitachiin-kun, and that your measures have been entirely counterproductive."

Kaoru takes an inaudible breath – it burns down his lungs. "Yes, I know. I will improve."

The computer on the desk steals Yoshio's attention, and he pays Kaoru no more heed except to say, "I shall not keep you any longer, Hitachiin-kun."

Standing up and, yes, bowing lowly, Kaoru is craving freedom as he backs out of the office with his act still mostly together when Yoshio launches his parting shot.

"Lest Hitachiin-kun believe me to be a cruel man, I think there is no need for either of us to inform my son of what has happened here. Your oversights are matters of the past. I should not wish Hitachiin-kun to meet with trouble."

Upon processing those words and understanding their hidden implications, Kaoru thinks, _what bullshit_, sparing a moment to feel a flare of animosity and indignation that Yoshio should arrogate to himself the right to dictate Kaoru's relationship with Kyouya.

He does the prudent thing and flees.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"There you are, Kaoru-kun!" Ranka fusses worriedly. "Where have you been?"

Kaoru had dashed out of the hospital to where his chauffeur was waiting only to be accosted by Ranka. They'd agreed to meet here at 7:30 pm to allow Ranka to get to work at the okama bar.

"I'm sorry," he wheezes, checking his watch. The hands show that it is 7:39 pm. "My driver will drive faster; you'll get there on time, Papa-san!"

As he is speaking, he is pushing Ranka into the car and squashing himself in too.

"W – Wait, Kao – "

"Drive, drive!" Kaoru bellows at the Hitachiins' long-suffering driver, who scrambles behind the wheel and nearly drops his keys in his frenzy.

Ranka is thankfully dumbstruck at the sudden haste and offers up no more protestations nor puts up any more resistance. The car hurtles out into the main roads and speeds along to Tokyo's nightclub district.

Kaoru apologises to Ranka once more, abashed at his lateness.

"Stop, Kaoru-kun," Ranka interjects. "I know that 20 minutes is enough. Where were you? Driver-san told me that Hikaru-kun left a while ago."

"Ah, yeah, he went to Mori-senpai's house. I was somewhere else in the hospital, I lost track of time," Kaoru explains, stretching out his legs.

Ranka purses his rouge red lips in thought as he surveys Kaoru's ungainly sprawl.

Apparently having made up his mind about something, he winds down the coal-coloured screen separating the driver from the rest of the limo. "Stop the car."

"Eh?" Kaoru straightens.

"I said, stop the car."

The hapless chauffeur complies with Ranka's demand, turning into one of the more deserted residential streets.

"Ranka-papa, what – "

"Good boy, Driver-san," Ranka praises with a feminine giggle. "Now get out."

Horribly perplexed, the driver looks to Kaoru who really is in no better position.

"Driver-san, listen to me," Ranka says sweetly, gripping the driver's chin with manicured fingers, "I'm not kidnapping your master. We're just going to have a little chat. Privately."

Unceremoniously slipping back into his male voice, he finishes with, "So get out and stand at a distance until we call you."

Obediently, the cowed driver wobbles out on unsteady legs.

Ranka doesn't speak even after they are left alone.

_Bzzzt, bzzzt_, goes Kaoru's phone. He ignores it.

"What is it, Papa-san?"

Thick, unnaturally long eyelashes close over a pair of embellished eyes. Ranka's glittery silver eyeliner underscores a palette of peacock feather hues. He isn't wearing much blush today, opting instead to show off his excellent complexion which has been enhanced through judiciously applied foundation and concealer.

When Ranka opens his eyes, he asks a question that is both perceptive yet staggeringly blunt, proving in one fell swoop that he is truly Haruhi's father.

"Kaoru-kun, have you considered that you might be homosexual? Or at the very least considered that you are bisexual?"

_He did figure it out after all, the reason I wanted to visit Misuzu-chi's 'friend'. _Kaoru can't help but smile.

"Yeah, I've thought about it," he answers honestly. How can he not, being the uke in his feature attraction at the host club?

Something soft and sad creeps across Ranka's face.

"Mm," he breathes in patient understanding and impulsively pulls Kaoru into an embrace. It's a funny thing, the way Ranka is holding him – the unvoiced burden of the world and the shroud of perfume so distinctly like a mother; the low-pitched murmur and the bigger-sized hands so much like a father.

"Um, uh, Ranka-papa, it's not like – I mean, I'm not sure, I still don't know – "

Ranka's gaze seems to say: _I know_.

However, what Ranka verbalises is the history behind Misuzu's friend – ex-boyfriend, to be precise. The three of them met when they were younger, back when Misuzu was still in the closet, and Misuzu fell hard and fast for this guy who was lively and magnetic and the personification of everything Misuzu did not have and could not be in his respectable desk job. By Ranka's account, it was a great but ill-fated romance since the guy had issues (mainly related to substance abuse), and Misuzu left him when the guy took money out of the bank account that Misuzu had set aside for Mei's education without Misuzu's permission.

It hadn't been any sort of frightening sexually transmitted disease that hospitalised him. Kaoru knows that out gays in his home country are in less danger of homophobic violence than in some western countries since the Japanese typically employ ostracism; unlike many of his fellow countrymen, Kaoru also knows that sexually transmitted diseases aren't 'limited to westerners' – his mother has given them a fairly liberal education and extended stays in a number of European countries, particularly France, means that Kaoru hasn't been kept in a bubble of ignorance.

Ranka tells him that Misuzu has kept in contact with his ex out of concern that he might overdose on drugs – a valid fear, as it'd turned out.

"Will he be all right?"

"The doctors are trying," Ranka replies. "It doesn't look good. He hasn't regained consciousness. Misuzu-chi will be all right, of course. Maybe not now, but he will be. One day. Just like how I survived after I didn't have Kotoko around anymore."

Kaoru squeezes Ranka's hand encouragingly.

"I'm fine, Kaoru-kun," Ranka sighs faintly with the faraway glaze of remembered pain. "Only that in those months… I missed having someone's arms around me. I didn't want to move on and I didn't know if Haruhi would blame me for moving on… I hope you fall in love someday, Kaoru-kun, whether man or woman. I hope you never find yourself alone."

Ranka regards him seriously, more parental than Kaoru has ever known him before.

"And if you aren't that lucky, go and paste something to your forehead that announces to the world that you want to be held, to be kissed; that you want to know how that is like. You of all people weren't made to be on your own, Kaoru-kun."

Kaoru ducks his head and laughs diffidently. "I'm actually really choosy, Papa-san. I don't think it'll be easy for me. I won't settle for less – I _can't_."

"Kaoru-kun has to admire someone very much," Ranka surmises confidently, "in order to love that person, ne?"

_Of course_, Kaoru thinks to himself. Ranka is the same. Kotoko was the coolest, cleverest, most capable woman he'd ever met, and he worshipped the ground she walked on. Kaoru had fallen for those exact qualities in Haruhi, and he imagines that he will continue to fall for people who tick the boxes of cool, clever, capable.

The primary drawback of being attracted to these strong, independent types is that, "I'll be terrified."

Ranka identifies with him, as Kaoru now knows he would. "When Kotoko and I married, I worked till I dropped, I cooked and cleaned, I wish I could have carried Haruhi and done everything for my Kotoko; day after day I dreamt of her becoming the best lawyer in Japan. Kaoru-kun, the greatest proof of loving someone is to wish for their success. That was so hard, because I was always afraid that when it happened Kotoko would leave me… in the end, it's a risk you have to take."

_Okay_, Kaoru nods. _Okay._

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Ranka was late to work anyway.

Kaoru had checked his inbox while on his way home for a bath – Hikaru had sent word that he'd rather stay at Mori's overnight to cut down on travel time, which would allow him to wake at six instead of five thirty in the morning.

It seems that Hikaru's sleeping habits are increasingly healthy and regular while Kaoru is keeping later hours than usual – undoubtedly a byproduct of the company they've been with.

After firing off a brief email to Hacker-san, Kaoru heads over to Kyouya's as agreed and is notified by Tachibana that Kyouya has been delayed by an extension of the meeting, chiefly due to Yuuichi and Akito's unforeseen participation in it.

Kaoru feels a spike of trepidation. The show was meant to be run by Tamaki and Kyouya! It's _their_ team, and if Kyouya's brothers hijack it they will undermine the two project leaders whose young age already puts them at a disadvantage.

Vexed, he is pacing around Kyouya's spacious bedroom instead of focusing on the album of award-winning CG character designs like he'd originally intended. His laptop, left abandoned on the bed, displays the activities log on their club database. Stark blue highlights indicate the dates that Kyouya has absented himself and Tamaki – not as many as Kaoru had feared, and Tamaki's violet text inserts appear to compensate for it by arranging other sessions.

Kaoru's seniors' determination to fit their friends into their lives is… spine-tingling. Heaven knows it would cause Kaoru's ego to swell if he didn't watch himself. It must be a little dangerous to be so valuable to someone else.

It's past nine and Kaoru gets the impression that it won't be a short wait. Removing his cropped-sleeve blazer and hanging it up beside Kyouya's coats, he wanders down to the hi-fi home stereo to plug in his senior's iPod.

In his leisure time, Kyouya listens almost exclusively to classical or orchestral music and his preference for the Austro-German composers is pronounced, for his collection is comprised of operas from Mozart, Wagner, Richard Strauss, and further includes Bach, Händel and Mendelssohn; yet he displays his signature unwillingness to confine himself as well as that constant drive for personal enrichment, which is why there is always a playlist tucked away that's filled with recently released singles of very modern pop songs sung by crooning and rocking celebrities. Also, there are official soundtracks and theme songs of famous movies and games, which Kyouya claims assist him to polish his competence in hosting.

It's side-splittingly funny whenever one of those un-Kyouya songs starts playing.

Nobody ever laughs out loud, at least not in front of Kyouya.

Kaoru droops onto the fluffy bed in a loose curl to edit Friday's schedule of appointments and to mark on the roster Hikaru's unavailability by reason of his modelling commitments, and before he knows it, the day takes its toll and he succumbs to sleep.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) Big, big bonus points to whoever has figured out which popular character I've modelled Honey after. His darker side is simply delicious. I was thinking how to make Honey hot (please see Chapter 41, page 30; 'so manly' LOL) – you know, _kakkoi_ – and of course the answer is sleek fast cars! Dangerous speeds! Slinky metallic bodies! It goes without saying that Lamborghini makes everything sexier :D

(b) The racetrack is essentially Fuji Speedway, though I have chosen not to name it in the story proper.

(c) References:

Mori's short-sightedness: in the manga, Mori gives his extra contact lenses to Haruhi for her initial transformation into a host – Chapter 1, page 29.

School rule #9: Chapter 18, page 46.

Ranka and Kotoko's love story: omake Chapter 70.5.

Ranka and Kotoko really were pregnant with Haruhi before they married: Chapter 76, page 12 (Kousaka refers to their marriage as a shotgun marriage).

(d) I have searched for a suitable name for dear Mr Hitachiin _for ages and ages_. I love the twins' parents, can you tell? Here it is:

Hitachiin Yasuhiro (常陸院 · 泰裕): Yasuhiro can actually be written in one of 4 different kanji.

1 - 泰裕: "calm and leisurely"

2 - 泰弘: "most calm"

3 - 恭弘: "most respectful"

4 - 泰博: "abundant tranquillity"

Yes, the point is that he is an OASIS OF CALM. *cracks up*

Interestingly, many of the host club parents have canon first names starting from 'Y': Yuzuha, Yoshio, Yuzuru, Yorihisa.

(e) I seriously forgot about exams. I forgot that my characters, students in high school, have exams. OTL. That's why Kaoru is getting back his results so late hahahaa just pretend Kaoru's English teacher was sick. Usually midterms last only about 3 days, and fewer subjects are tested than during the finals.

Here is the Japanese exam timetable:

Midterms in first and second trimesters, but not the third which is shorter.  
>- First trimester midterms: late May.<br>- Second trimester midterms (Kaoru is now in the second trimester): late October.

Finals are at the end of all trimesters:  
>- First trimester finals: early in the month of July<br>- Second trimester finals: end of November-start December (Yes, Kyouya is one of those unfortunate kids whose birthdays generally land in the exam period/study week; the rest of them have birthdays that fall well clear of the exam timeframe)  
>- Third trimester finals: March<p>

(f) Many of Ranka's comments from the conversation in the car come from Jane Birkin, who says that she fell for people who were 'pretty damn wonderful' throughout her 65 years. I definitely believe that the more Kaoru and Ranka respect someone, the easier and harder they fall in love. That sort of love never leaves them either, because it is based on precisely that most unshakeable foundation of relationships.

In fact, here is someone who's put it in better words than I can, so I'm just going to cut and paste it. I hope you don't mind. You know who you are, you lovely person, thank you ;)

Underlining is mine:

_She [Haruhi] is his [Kaoru's] Most Important Person next to Hikaru, but maybe even a little more important because __Kaoru puts Haruhi on a pedestal__ (whereas his perceptions of his twin are much more realistic and honest) and __idolizes her__ in ways that he never really does with anyone else._

_[…]_

_And because Kaoru is someone who likes being stuck in moments, I don't think he'd ever let go of her because loving her, loving the club, makes him feel safe._

Where I'm coming from, I noticed that Ranka basically thinks of Kotoko the same way. Certainly I agree that there is a conviction in both Ranka and Kaoru that Kotoko/Haruhi is in some intrinsic, indefinable way a greater and better person.

The thing is, I also absolutely agree that Kaoru likes being stuck – he's a dreamer and he can afford the luxury of that dreaming because of his wealth and his chosen profession. But I also believe that Kaoru is surrounded by people who can help him come unstuck. That's actually the overarching goal of 1-7th, that the people who know Kaoru so well and love him so much will do it in a way that doesn't destroy him in the process.

These 7 people are so entangled that they can't exist separately any longer. That's why a lot of the two-people standalone couple relationships feel somewhat unbelievable except for the main Tamaki/Haruhi, and that's only because the mangaka directed her concerted efforts towards it.

In a way, Haruhi and Tamaki are the ones most protected by the rest of the club (I've alluded to this previously) – the rest have been known to keep their observations to themselves, and we don't get that much development in some relationships in the canon work, like Haruhi-Mori, Kyouya-Hikaru, etc, because they lack screen time.

Yet the point of the manga ending is: "host club forever". Don't you think it means something special that the rest of the club dropped everything to follow Haruhi and Tamaki to Boston in the manga? Side characters always suffer a little, this is true of all works. Simply by changing around the lead characters from H & T to K and K, suddenly so many behind-the-scenes possibilities open up – new ways for the characters to connect and new discoveries to be made.

If you make Hikaru and Mori the leads, once again you get another perspective, another branch of unexplored stories.

Turn that around in your minds for the moment, and we'll continue our analysis in the next chapters!

For now, when Kaoru is taught different ways to love, when Kaoru begins to change…

.

Acknowledgements

It occurs to me, with no small amount of pleasure, that I have captured exactly the sort of audience I wanted. The truth is, the OT7 is predicated upon a healthy liking and appreciation of ALL characters, even if a person may have favourites. It is rather hurtful to see character-bashing, since I feel that Hatori-sensei has gone to extensive lengths to show us aspects of each character that is worthy of admiration.

Without naming anyone, I have to publicly express my gratitude at the many supremely intelligent and insightful comments about the Ouran characters that I've received. They have helped me immensely while writing this. My debt to these people is vast. Sometimes I gasp in sheer amazement at how clearly all of you have understood Hatori-sensei's characters. For example, the rounding out of Mitsukuni and Takashi as more than just caricatures, I owe a lot to one person in particular. Thank you, sweetie, for horrifying me with your interpretation on Honey's dark side LOL.

In fact I am going to beg for more of those amazing analyses right now. Hahaha. For anyone who feels like sparing the time and effort to share your opinions, thoughts, beliefs, feelings about any of the characters or the plot, please please do drop me a private message. A few sentences is more than brilliant, and if it is essay length I will absolutely plough through it, and I will make this a better homage to the world of Ouran.

Thank you just for reading my fic. When I write this, I am always hoping it makes you smile and laugh.

17/02/2012

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

_Continued in Part C._


	11. Intermission: Kyouya

**INTERMISSION: KYOUYA**

**Opening: Queen on Colour**

.

When Kyouya comes home to find a wayward kouhai sound asleep in his bed, he sighs, smiles and shakes his head. After placing his briefcase on his desk, he goes to his wardrobe to fish out a pair of pyjamas.

Kaoru is drawn into a tight little ball as though trying to keep himself contained and protected. His things lie scattered on Kyouya's bed, and Kyouya gathers them up to put them away by his bag on the sofa at the lower level of the room. He catches a glimpse of what Kaoru had been doing on the laptop and feels a mix of emotions too soft and finespun to define with any precision.

Another sigh escapes him. Whatever will he do with this junior?

It is not that Kyouya doesn't understand _love_ and _attachment_ – it is that Kaoru hopes to survive the game without losing a single chess piece, and that, Kyouya knows, is _simply impossible_.

The other thing that Kyouya knows is this: for all that Haruhi is the commoner amongst them, she is not the pawn in the game – no, _Kaoru_ is, because he has never wanted to be anything else.

Kaoru only wants to do what pawns do, which is to provide a blockade that protects the rest of them and to be the one that is taken first by the enemy while the rest of them advance towards victory. If he could, he would make enough copies of himself to form a fence that safeguards them entirely, keeping them where harm cannot reach them, exactly like the starting position of chess. Even given a choice, this junior wouldn't pick to be one of the more valuable pieces because he wouldn't want his loss to negatively affect any of their prospects. He's an overworked piece, constantly trying to defend everything at once.

They all have their places. Kyouya himself is not spared, for which human no matter how clever can choose to only be a player and not a piece at the same time? Life itself is the board, to be alive is to play, and Kyouya wants to participate and to _win_.

Of course, this means that he will settle for nothing less than the most powerful position on offer. Kyouya can't stand being helpless and cosseted – that's Tamaki's job – and he must have the largest, longest and widest range, be the most functional, be able to move aggressively and decisively yet have such value that all other pieces should be surrendered to the opponent before he is.

Already in the structure of the club, Kyouya knows he is essential to the king's survival. However, built into the very source of his power is his weakness: the damnable dependence on his king, for without the king, _there is no game_. In the end, the highest value amongst the pieces is still less than the infinite value of the king; in the end, even if he has scrambled and fought for the duration of the match, even if he has risked his life out in the open, even if victory comes from the fruits of his labour, the empire belongs to the king.

Perhaps it is this reason that had caused his fight with Tamaki over their succession. After he'd made the appointment unilaterally, without seeking Tamaki's opinion (apparently he'd been prepared to shut down the club and encourage their juniors in the direction of other extra-curricular activities), Tamaki had been so upset that he'd actually raised his voice at him, not in his usual boisterous manner that Kyouya gets an earful of everyday anyway, but in the way he had reacted towards those unfortunate D-class students that had made Haruhi 'cry'.

In the past year, Kaoru has alternately been stuck where he is or quietly moving forward to make way for the others to move forward as well – demonstrating an impeccable self-awareness that in shielding his twin and Haruhi, he also hedges them in and inhibits their progress. Again, his movements reflect those of a pawn – how did Kyouya not realize what Kaoru is until that day?

That day when the queen was so occupied with other concerns that she had come under threat without knowing it… and found a pawn in front of her defending her resolutely.

Pawns aren't supposed to make bold, dangerous moves – pawns shouldn't even have such mobility!

Shocked by his own oversight, he'd vented his anger at the pawn. A part of it had been sheer hubris, he knows – _I am a queen, you are a pawn, how dare you move without my permission?_

Not only had the pawn not called him out on it, the pawn had run away, cried, accepted culpability that was not his to bear, apologised, and made up for it through a lovely scarf that cost time and effort; when the pawn discovered that it had been manoeuvred _as a pawn_ into the position that he now finds himself in, he'd _smiled_, with those eyes that apportioned no blame and brought Kyouya to the brink of guilt for foisting that responsibility off on him.

Why Tamaki had seen the need to enumerate the arguments against Kaoru becoming president is beyond Kyouya. The truth is that all four of them seniors know full well Kaoru's disposition and temperament – no, that's not right – Tamaki doesn't know what Kaoru went through, further weakening his ability to lecture Kyouya. He had not known that there was even a question to ask, much less what question to ask, whereas Kyouya had immediately extracted the whole story from Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai upon his return from the school trip to France.

Tamaki senses emotion but Kaoru cannot be understood by feeling alone because Kaoru is always compromising himself with his rationality – had Tamaki honestly thought that Kyouya would not give this matter the most thorough consideration? It is unlike Tamaki to underestimate him.

Obviously, then, it'd been _something else_ Tamaki had not understood. _Cannot_ understand, Kyouya would venture to say.

Tamaki is made for glory.

Since before they met properly, Kyouya has envied it. That emotion has been largely superseded and supplanted by others: respect, loyalty, fraternity. Vestiges of it remain, enough to spark a memory of how bitter it'd felt.

How can a born winner of the Actor in a Leading Role understand Kaoru, who is one of those people whose names are on the credits when most of the audience is leaving or have left the cinema? How can a king understand a pawn, especially one who moves like it has no idea that promotion is possible in the rules of the game?

Kyouya has witnessed it – Kaoru's willingness to accept the dregs if it means that those he loves get what they want. Ask him for the last sandwich when his stomach is empty and he'd say yes. Make him stay back to clean up while the rest are free to go and he'd say yes. Tell him to give up his exclusive tickets to the afterparty of a fashion magazine for the customers to bid on and he'd say yes.

Kyouya knows all of these for sure, for he'd been the person to make these demands.

So quite correctly he agrees with Tamaki: Hikaru could share the burden of host club leadership.

But.

Hikaru wouldn't be taking on half the burden. The actual proportion is probably something like a quarter or less. Better than nothing, right?

Wrong.

Looking at the redhead sleeping peacefully, definitely wrong.

Kyouya has a complete range of offense and defense – his contributions will not go without some form of accolade, like collecting Best Picture as a producer, or winning Best Director, or… both, really. Kaoru, on the other hand, will spend his life leading his loved ones to the red carpet and pushing them into the spotlight, allowing himself to shine if and only if they are also receiving commendation.

It boils down to this: there is no way that Kyouya will see Kaoru become queen to his brother in a new game, to let Kaoru's triumphs be fed to Hikaru, to take on that cursed fate of being the most powerful but still ultimately disposable in the scheme of things.

In this, he believes that he has his senpais' support though they have diplomatically refrained from taking either his or Tamaki's side explicitly. Certainly it must have caused them much inner conflict and grief for they both dote on Kaoru terribly, whether or not it is evident to other people or even to Kaoru himself. If anything happens to Kaoru as a result of this, will the three of them ever be able to forgive themselves, knowing that they set him on this path and knowing what this path may entail? Kaoru's intense devotion to them speaks for itself, for Kyouya isn't plagued by any doubt at all that Kaoru will forgive and excuse him.

Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai are so mighty that they cannot be contained in one piece each – they may not even be in the same game, or, as Kyouya suspects, like him they have surpassed the limitations of being a piece to become simultaneously piece and player, and while Kyouya is best employed where the action is at, they are better as observing players, intervening and not intervening as necessary.

Notwithstanding that, if Kyouya had to designate pieces to them, Honey-senpai would be bishop x 2 and Mori-senpai would be knight x 2.

… How curious. Kyouya may have just solved the mystery of why Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai appear to suffer from decreased effectiveness: ironically, because they make it their business to protect their juniors. As the sayings go, 'bad bishops protect good pawns', and 'a knight on the rim is dim'. Time and again Honey-senpai has moved to save Kaoru despite directly putting himself in disadvantageous positions, or he exerts control from afar to relieve the weight of Kaoru's responsibilities. Mori-senpai is always leaping to their rescue, literally and figuratively – a good chunk of that involves letting the juniors do as they wish, which means that Mori-senpai sidelines himself to give them space to learn their lessons and develop their relationships themselves. There's a secret there that no one apart from the two senpais and Kyouya know; maybe more accurately, Kyouya merely has an unproven theory of how much the seniors have willingly given up.

Someone must have done something to stop Hikaru from pestering Kaoru all this while… more challenging still, someone must have done something to stop Tamaki from hindering Kaoru's lessons. It wasn't Kyouya on either count and the process of elimination rapidly discloses the masterminds.

They must realise too that by virtue of age Kaoru is naturally subject to them, yet within his year level where it should have been a level playing ground, he picks to be the smallest, to rank behind his twin and Haruhi. By the very fact of being a pawn, his potential is the greatest.

This game is incredibly difficult because the other pieces on the same side have minds of their own. Regardless of how much they care for each other, they cannot help but have differing minor goals underneath their overarching main goal to stay together, and although they are all on the board and a few of them are capable of marshaling their combined firepower under a central command, none of them actually know what sort of chess this is going to be.

All they know is to be sharp, adaptable and fiercely protective. By himself Kyouya cannot succeed; he has accepted this, or Tamaki would have paid dearly for his interference. If this is the classic version, the three of them are long prepared and coordinated. They will strategically arrange the middlegame to set up a favourable endgame. A queen, two bishops and two knights far exceed the bare minimum material to force checkmate, especially as these minor pieces are probably super mutant pieces in a masquerade.

They will watch as Kaoru inches forward, step-by-step, accomplishing what sacrifice and determination can achieve. Who knows which point he will get to? Passed pawns often decide the game; outside passed pawns are positively deadly; reach the final rank and he may transform to tip the scales. Two queens are sufficient to force a checkmate _without_ backing the opponent into a corner – meaning that Kyouya will need only one other to bring about a win, that is how strong Kaoru can become. In some variants of chess, a pawn can even be promoted to king.

For this glimmer in the distance, for this one promise, Kyouya will personally escort this pawn to the square where it will earn its crown, if for nothing else than to show his kouhai what a game-changer a pawn can be.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Question

Just informally, can I know if all of you prefer (a) more frequent updates, or (b) longer chapters? I can split up each chapter into even smaller parts to churn them out more often. LOL it's a bit silly having like Chapter 5 a, b, c, d, e, f, g but to be honest I feel that my chapter lengths are getting a bit unwieldy and that the story suffers from the large gap in between chapter updates. :-/


	12. Chapter 5C

**CHAPTER FIVE(C)**

**White Team Fight!**

.

**C.**

This is Kyouya.

An Ootori, and everything that the family name entails.

The youngest, with all its privileges and burdens.

A chessmaster-businessman, and the strategic half.

Captain of the White Team.

"Kaoru. Kaoru," someone is calling softly, pulling Kaoru out from the depths of sleep.

The voice is moderated and restrained. The hand on his shoulder does not shake him; clearly, it belongs to a person who understands how much is precisely right and how much would be overkill.

Or maybe it just belongs to someone who understands how annoying it is to be woken up.

The hand slides down Kaoru's arm to pry his fingers open and press a bundle of soft material into his grip – the cool contact of skin instantly identifies the owner of the touch and orientates Kaoru in the present.

When Kaoru peers blearily at it, the bundle turns out to be a set of silk pyjamas.

"Change and go under the covers," Kyouya instructs, still maintaining his low tone. The bed is dipped on the side that he is sitting on, and Kaoru catches on at last.

_Kyouya-senpai is home!_

His laptop and album are gone, presumably removed to a safe place. In the background, the Rhinemaidens continue to sing ecstatically about the secret of the gold. Kaoru had been sleeping curled up on his side, as is his habit, and he lifts his head to see his senior haloed in the dim lights of the room.

For a long moment Kaoru is struck breathless.

He absolutely cannot tear his eyes away.

"I take it you approve," Kyouya says with a hint of smugness.

_This._

Radiating power and sophistication, this is Kaoru's ideal of how a man should look like in a business suit. The bespoke Savile Row, crisp collar and lapels, straight fold pocket square, exact crease down the trouser legs, the Hermes tie, the simple but obscenely expensive tie bar, and – yes, Kaoru spots a pair of Berluti's at the corner.

So they've seen each other in formal wear before, but not business, and not like this.

"Wow," Kaoru gasps, pushing his fringe up in disbelief. The ensemble is _divine_. "That's…"

"Your favourite tie?" his senior drawls, resembling a cat that's got the cream.

"Yes!" Kaoru nods vigorously. "I didn't know senpai owned it! I've never seen you wear it."

Meaningfully, Kyouya adjusts his glasses. A tiny speck of white gold shines in his French cuffs.

If Kyouya is trying to kill him by stopping his heart, he's succeeding beautifully.

"You – !"

Kaoru had not known that these cufflinks existed anywhere outside of the paper of his sketchbooks. Reverently, he takes hold of his senior's wrist and draws it to himself so that he may examine the physical manifestation of his own design. Kyouya lets him trace the web of criss-crossed lines that form a labyrinthine complexity – everything is as Kaoru had imagined the small piece of jewellery would be, from the choice of precious metal to the positioning of the brilliant cut diamonds.

It has been crafted to perfection.

At this distance, too, he can smell the scent on Kyouya.

_The scent_. God help him. Kaoru shares his mother's weakness for perfumery. It is lovely, but, hmm, maybe he should –

Kaoru comes to the only reasonable conclusion and bursts into laughter. "You've been snooping through my stuff!"

"You left them here. Did you expect me not to look? Really, Kaoru."

Honey is correct about Kyouya – he isn't that hard to read, mostly because he doesn't care to hide himself or deny responsibility when accused. He sells their things without their permission and whatnot, and it's just that… what _can_ they do to him? Who can touch him?

As Kyouya had been speaking, he'd removed the exquisite cufflinks and placed them in Kaoru's palm. "Here is your payment for being my unwitting personal stylist."

"No!" Kaoru disagrees vehemently, returning them to his senior. "No! I'm glad senpai liked them! Keep them, please."

"Are you certain? They're yours," Kyouya tells him.

Though Kyouya is too well-bred to show any signs of wistfulness, all the same Kaoru can read between the lines. Surely he must have liked them enough to have them custom made, and the attention to detail betrays Kyouya's attachment to them. He's even worn them to his first official meeting with his team!

Kaoru grins fondly at him. "Yes. Keep them, senpai. It's more valuable to us fashion designers for someone to wear our art."

"It _is_ art. They are wonderfully understated," Kyouya praises, appreciatively rubbing his thumb over the delicate mini maze, which looks fragile at the edges but harbours a strong core where the lines intersect.

Kaoru understands. Kyouya doesn't like his clothing to shout, especially not in the boardroom, though that is no excuse to abandon oneself to dullness.

After a while, Kyouya remarks, "This design is so very…"

He flicks his gaze upward to meet Kaoru's. It is like he can read the state of mind Kaoru was in when Kaoru drafted these seven interlocked lines with the hardest, most precious jewel binding them together.

"It is quintessentially you."

Unaccountably shy, Kaoru merely smiles in embarrassment. All of his designs are him – that is the problem of being creative, that anyone willing to spare the effort may clearly see his soul through his work.

Again Kyouya reaches for him. This time, Kaoru finds himself in possession of only one cufflink.

_Take it._

Shocked to the core, Kaoru seeks out an explanation with wide eyes. What would a respectable businessman such as Kyouya do with an incomplete pair? Or, could he possibly know what it means?

"I noticed you regularly walk around with mismatched cufflinks," Kyouya wryly answers his unasked question. "I had a chat with Yuzuha-san about it."

As Kaoru accepts the tiny treasure, he knows that he never, ever wants to get used to this feeling of amazement.

Since young, Kaoru has always liked the same things as Hikaru. The sole solution had been for them to share everything, or, if the item was divisible, to split it into half-and-half. When they were seven, one of their mother's peers, a world-renowned jeweller, gave the twins two pairs of cufflinks, each pair unique and one-of-its-kind in the world. Both of them preferred the purple mosaic pair that was given to Hikaru over the white pearl-pavé combination that Kaoru had received. Knowing that Hikaru loved his gift, Kaoru hadn't made a fuss; proving himself no less selfless a brother, Hikaru had swapped one of Kaoru's for one of his as a most solemn vow that "nothing will ever be more important to me than you, Kaoru."

The trend caught on with the rest of their family – Kaoru doesn't have a single matched pair, for one of the sets is always given to his mother, father or Hikaru as a promise.

"Flattering though it is to have you stare, go back to sleep. I know you're tired."

Kyouya starts shedding his suit jacket, tie and associated accessories on his way to the wardrobe.

"You're more tired than me," Kaoru says concernedly. "Why did today's meeting end late?"

"My brothers gave a report on the sales figures in their regions," Kyouya replies levelly, crouching over a drawer.

Kaoru immediately sees the dilemma. It is rather a roundabout method to set the minimum standard Kyouya must achieve in order to stand on equal footing, yet if Kyouya meets the target it will be as if he is challenging them directly. Tamaki could serve as a cover, that is, he could be credited with their accomplishments, but that ignores the long-term consideration of proving Kyouya to be the true candidate to the family business.

If Kyouya chooses to stay second in this, if he stands behind, he will always stay second. It will chart the course of his future in this arena.

Kaoru feels useless. It is an emotion he is unaccustomed to experiencing, at least, not until he'd joined the host club and encountered forces greater than him or his family. He's not arrogant enough to believe that he alone can solve all problems, though he wishes. Oh, how he wishes.

"It is not for you to worry about it." From his little business card case, Kyouya withdraws a patterned card. "This, however, is."

The patterned card lists one name and an address. There is no company attached to the name.

"This lady is a master of crocheting. She believes she will be able to realise your crocodile skin coat."

Kaoru inhales deeply and holds his breath.

There is a reason that particular design has remained a flat pattern for so long – because no one has the requisite skill to bring it to life. This, then, is why Kaoru cannot help but intensely admire his senior: because Kyouya solves his own problems and others', too. He is the sort of person who would go behind one's back to move the world for them, and then turn around to pretend that he doesn't care one way or another.

"Senpai…"

"I happened to know the right people," Kyouya replies carelessly. "At any rate, a 'thank you' will suffice. Now, bed."

"How would you know the right people when I don't?" Kaoru has to ask.

"You really are an inquisitive kouhai," Kyouya sighs. "She is a former surgeon who decided to pursue another calling in life."

"How can I repay you, senpai?"

"That is hardly necessary – it's a mere recommendation. I can't guarantee that she will do what she claims she can."

"Oh, okay, I guess. Thanks, senpai."

"Finally."

Kaoru snorts and slides off the bed. He is about to change into the pyjamas when something strikes him: "Um, Kyouya-senpai… is your entire family at home?"

"Now? Yes."

"Even your father?"

Kyouya stops everything he's doing to focus on Kaoru.

"Does that make you uncomfortable?"

"Ootori-sama wants me to update him about club. He was… displeased at being left out."

"He spoke to you?" Kyouya asks sharply. "When?"

"This evening." Kaoru recounts the incident in as much detail as he can, leaving out only the part where he'd more-or-less taken the rap for his senior. "I – I think, from the sounds of it, Ootori-sama has been waiting for you to appoint a successor for a while, because, you know, whatever information senpai gives to him is obviously glossed up and spun to fit your political needs – that is, if senpai even gave him any information at all."

"I kept it to a minimum," Kyouya confirms, looking unreasonably relieved.

Kaoru frowns, confused. "Shouldn't you be troubled by this? Of course from now on I'll ensure that I only tell your father what you want him to know, Kyouya-senpai."

An unexpected smile greets his statement – it quickly evolves into laughter.

"S-Senpai!" Kaoru exclaims, going to him anxiously. "Are you in shock?! Honestly, I didn't say anything to damage your father's opinion of you, I swear!"

Kyouya pats his head. "I know."

"Then – ?"

"Did he attempt to steer you into a position where you'd admit that it was my doing?"

"Uh – uhh – !"

"Did you subsequently make it seem like it was wholly your fault?"

"No!" Kaoru denies reflexively. "No, that wasn't – really, I mean, that's – "

"I thought you might have," Kyouya cuts him off, eyes glittering with something calculative. "I am sorry that you had to endure what you did; it was not my intention, though I see now that I always knew you'd react in such a manner to such a situation; therefore, you are the only one who should be placed in this scenario. Thank you."

"N-Nuh, it's not a big deal."

The smile doesn't fade from his senior's face – he appears to be smiling more to himself than at Kaoru.

"Regardless, it is all right for you to stay over. My family are more likely to summon me to another room if they have anything to discuss with me, and it is not unusual for me to have guests."

"Ah, yeah… I bet they're used to having Tono around." Kaoru nods.

"Not at all. When my father is present, I'm reluctant to let Tamaki loose in the house. My team is aware that Tamaki is strictly banned from staying overnight unless my father is overseas."

"Eh?!" Kaoru is astonished. "Really! I never knew! God, that's a bit sad, isn't it? But I guess it's risky to trust Tono around Ootori-sama."

"On the contrary, I don't trust my father around Tamaki."

"… That's even sadder," Kaoru says flatly.

"Hmm, well, perhaps it's a bit of both – I am also not keen on having Tamaki interact too much with my father. He may reveal things about me to him in a bid to soften my father's heart or some other goal like that, which would be nothing short of disastrous. Think about it: Tamaki has a compulsion to make other people happy. He clings to the higher ideals – love, hope, et cetera – and he believes that if he tries hard enough he will eventually be able to sway people to subscribe to these notions as well. The fact that he'd succeeded in gaining his grandmother's favour has served to reinforce this. I don't know if I want him to know that life doesn't always work out that way. Tamaki wields a formidable transformative power, but so does my father. Who knows who will end up being transformed in a battle between them?"

Kaoru grimaces in sympathy. "Tono."

Kyouya shoots a glance at him, amused.

"Tono," Kaoru repeats. "Ootori-sama will win."

"You think so?"

"Yeah," he says. "Kyouya-senpai obviously thinks so too, no? If Kyouya-senpai thought Tono would win, you would have let Tono influence Ootori-sama already. The fact that senpai doesn't means that senpai knows it will result in a complete loss – or at least, that the chances are slim."

"Why are the chances slim?"

"Huh? 'Cos – 'cos of Ootori-sama's sheer seniority, and Tono is kind of an idiot so Ootori-sama will outwit him easily."

Kyouya raises an eyebrow.

"Not that I think Kyouya-senpai isn't smart enough!" Kaoru stammers, horrified at the underlying suggestion. "It's because Ootori-sama's personality is strong to the point where it can overwhelm – "

He pauses, then gasps with increased trepidation. "Not that I think Kyouya-senpai has a flimsy – !"

"It's fine," Kyouya saves him from himself. "Calm down, say no more. I'm not offended."

Kaoru stares helplessly at him as he vanishes into the bathroom to run his bath. Yes, he's not offended but he's disappointed and Kaoru can't do anything to alleviate that feeling; Kyouya judges him by a higher standard because they are similar; when Kaoru's ability fails him there is nowhere to hide, no possibility of feigning overall ignorance and foolishness to cover up for the fact that he doesn't possess that sort of –

Kaoru can't figure it out, and it hurts more than he could have imagined. He knows the real question is: 'what makes me different from my father?' and that in itself is loaded with plenty of explosive associations like 'is my father's personality type suited to be number one while mine is not?' and 'is it difference or is it inadequacy?' and Kaoru is _just not good enough_ to meet it.

He reins himself in and goes to tell his senpai that he's going home anyway to spend time with his parents. Toothbrush in mouth, Kyouya eloquently sends a sceptical look his way. _I've told you that you may stay._

"Senpai, I'm curious, who have you been entertaining in your home if not Tono?" he asks, sly and teasing.

Kyouya snorts. "What a sordid tone. Honey-senpai likely appreciates it more than I do; try it on him instead."

"Honey-senpai? What're you doing with Honey-senpai?"

"I don't see why I can't spend time with Honey-senpai," Kyouya remarks archly.

"But what're you doing with Honey-senpai?"

"You spend time with Honey-senpai."

"But what does Honey-senpai do with you?"

"We should call him to let him hear this conversation, he'll be delighted at how possessive you sound."

"I don't!"

Kyouya shakes his head resignedly, laughing a little. "Honey-senpai and I have German and advanced English lessons together. Surely you didn't think we became fluent without practice?"

"Really!" Kaoru grins, surprised. "I had no clue! How long have you guys been doing this?"

"A while."

Kaoru crosses his arms and leans against the doorframe. "Why so cagey?"

Kyouya straightens from where he'd been leaned over the sink to regard Kaoru.

"It's not mine to tell."

"Language lessons?! What's there to – Oh. _Ohhh_." Kaoru feels his own eyes widen with comprehension. "German! Cars, isn't it? Does this have something to do with Honey-senpai's racing?"

It is Kyouya's turn to show surprise. "I see. He told you."

"Yeah, _unbelievable_. I didn't know Honey-senpai could be so…"

"Quite," Kyouya smirks. "It gets even better once you find out his shareholdings in the top German and Italian automotive companies."

"Woah! What?!"

"Volkswagen AG, for example. And let's not get started on the Japanese companies. I think I've supplied enough hints…?"

Kaoru rolls his eyes. "Yes, thank you very much. More homework, hooray."

"Knowledge is power, Kaoru."

"Okay then, how long have you and Honey-senpai been allowed to get away with your secret plotting sessions to take over the world?"

"Exactly as you say, it's a secret," Kyouya says with a straight face.

Kaoru huffs irritably. "How come there are all these things about you senpais that I don't know? Weren't we virtually glued to each other last year? And the year before?"

Kyouya keeps silent, fiddling with the taps.

"It's – it's not like I demand to know these things. I mean, it's just, it would have been nice if," Kaoru fumbles for words. "I guess, it's really disconcerting?"

The voice is so soft that he almost misses it. "Kaoru, _think_."

Kaoru does, and feels in his bones the reminder of how far ahead his seniors are. "I know that all of you are ambitious and driven, I _knew_. Even slow as I am, I wouldn't assume that you'd rest on your laurels."

"Not that. Think about the events of last year," Kyouya instructs. "Simply because something is hugely obvious doesn't mean you should overlook it. Now, what did the senpais and I use to our advantage?"

Kaoru racks his brains. What hugely obvious event happened last year? Lots of – oh, _fuck_.

"Genius," he breathes, reeling from it. "Genius!"

They used _Haruhi_.

While the rest of them were agonizing over her, they applied their time and attention to carving out their futures. Their involvement with the club meant that they could project an image of being with related members and dealing with related matters everyday – even in the club members' minds, in Kaoru's own mind, his memories automatically include them whether they were actually present or not – and to others such as their parents and schoolmates, their private activities must have completely flown under the radar.

Nobody noticed because the club members had no inclination to and the outsiders had no opportunity to.

Wait…

"Senpais? Plural? Where does Mori-senpai feature?"

Kyouya smiles at him and says nothing.

"Aw, come on, Kyouya-senpai! A tiny clue? Just one?"

"Such a troublesome kouhai," Kyouya says lightly, exiting the bathroom and descending the steps. "Are you certain you wish to go home?"

"Kyou – " Kaoru hurries behind.

"If you're worried, I can get you out of the house without encountering anyone from my family."

"You can? I know it's a big house, but your family is made up of night-prowlers."

Pressing the intercom on the wall, Kyouya orders his team to wait for them in the garage.

He gestures to Kaoru's things. "If you cooperate, I most certainly can."

Kaoru picks them up obediently and his senpai takes his hand.

"From the stories I've heard, you must have admirable talent in stealth," Kyouya says, alight with excitement. "Time to prove yourself to me."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

They sneak into the garage and Kaoru bursts into giddy, euphoric laughter.

On their way out they'd dodged a zombified Akito, who'd had a steaming mug of coffee in his hand and heavy purple bags under his eyes, as well as made their way through the main hall where Fuyumi had been talking with her father. The interior of the house is deathly quiet and their movements had to be equally so – Kaoru notes with great interest that Kyouya seems to know all of the good hiding places, the noiseless floor surfaces, the soundless doors, and all the ways to circumvent occupied areas.

That was super, super_ fun_.

For an instant, Kaoru had been graced with that rarest of sights – a flash of the past, the child that his senior used to be. All the signs are there, and to one such as Kaoru, who had been one of those misbehaving children perpetually out of bed and a seasoned navigator of houses at night, recognition comes easily.

"Well done indeed," Kyouya praises, eyes bright. "A deserved reputation."

"Hidden depths, senpai," Kaoru compliments back.

"My parents always thought it unhealthy for young children to stay up too late," Kyouya shrugs. "But so much happens at night."

Kaoru stares, impressed.

"Tachibana, send Kaoru home; the rest of you are dismissed for the day," Kyouya commands.

Hotta looks like he has something to say; in a different household, he may have been bouncing on the balls of his feet.

"See you tomorrow, senpai." Kaoru gets into the car when Tachibana opens the door for him.

Hotta twitches where he stands.

Tachibana starts the engine.

"Oh!" Kaoru winds down the window. "Senpai! I remembered – your scent."

"What about it?"

"It's wonderful, but it doesn't suit you."

"Really? It was profiled by Penhaligon's."

"You lied, didn't you?" Kaoru asks knowingly. "Either that or you must have given them a description of what you wanted the scent to say about you, and yeah, okay, it's perfect for the business occasion but it's totally wrong about _you_."

"Interesting." Kyouya's eyes are narrowed in amusement. "What's wrong about it?"

"It's _stuffy_ – you know, _bound by tradition_. Yours should have a fresh spark underneath the top notes, something daring and dangerous and elusive."

"Oh?" Kyouya's demeanour takes on those exact characteristics Kaoru had listed. "Perhaps you might care to lend your expertise to my next purchase?"

"No can do, sorry," Kaoru grins widely. "I subscribe to my mother's philosophy, so unless you're going to marry me…"

Kyouya laughs. "Will you honestly reject potential partners if they don't permit you to dictate their choice of perfume?"

"_Yes_," Kaoru answers immediately. "A person's image should invoke the use of all five senses – this is the most basic tenet of all. There's a reason my mother specially formulates my dad's scent for him; how can he hope to attract and seduce her if she doesn't like the way he smells? Besides, _we're_ the ones who're educated in these things."

"Surely then it's a waste of your skill to apply it only to one person?"

"Not really, after all I'm not a professional perfumer," he snorts. "_Never_ underestimate the power of a good scent on men. My mother utterly, utterly cannot resist my dad, you know – it's kind of traumatic, really – so it'd be stupid of me to make you smell like how I like and die trying to resist you."

Kyouya laughs again. "Fine. I will subject myself to other professionals."

"Do that," Kaoru approves. "Keep this current one, though – it rocks the boardroom. Next time, don't think about conveying a specific message, just let the perfumers do their work with your genuine personality. I suspect yours will have leather in it somewhere, and spice with a dash of citrus – you know what, I'm going to stop talking. Bye, Kyouya-senpai."

Chuckling as he obligingly raises a hand to wave goodbye, Kyouya steps back from the car.

Hotta is absolutely itching to speak, now.

Kyouya heaves a put-upon sigh. "You may accompany Kaoru home if it is of _such_ _importance_ to you."

Kaoru sniggers.

"Thank you, Kyouya-sama!" Hotta bows, getting into the front passenger seat.

"May I go too, Kyouya-sama?" Aijima requests.

Kyouya shakes his head in mild disbelief. "Do whatever you want; your working hours are technically over."

Tachibana switches to sit beside Kaoru and Aijima takes the wheel while Kaoru tries desperately to stifle his mirth.

"Have a good night, Kyouya-sama/senpai!" four voices chime in un-rehearsed unison, and Kaoru cracks up uncontrollably as he is driven away.

"Kaoru-sama, Kaoru-sama!" Hotta turns around partially. "Are you doing anything for Kyouya-sama's birthday?"

"Is _this _what you guys wanted to talk about?" Kaoru asks incredulously. "For this reason you dumped poor Kyouya-senpai there?"

"Technically," Aijima says sedately, "our working hours are over."

Kaoru chokes out another bout of laughter.

"I found a kitten that I want to give to Kyouya-sama!" Hotta says spiritedly.

"A _kitten_?"

"It's cute enough to melt hearts," Tachibana informs him in a voice that is impassive to the point of being screamingly hilarious.

"_Seriously? A kitten?"_

"Yes, Kaoru-sama. It resembles Kyouya-sama's favourite – only – stuffed toy when he was young."

His mind blanking out spontaneously, Kaoru blinks at Tachibana. He's hearing words in his mother tongue but they don't make sense. "… What?"

"Kyouya-sama didn't like many toys," Aijima recalls, deep in thought.

"No, he didn't," Tachibana agrees nostalgically. "He always preferred reading or art or puzzles. If he played any game at all, it was chess or one of those memory or strategic games."

"That sounds… horrifyingly like senpai, actually. How imbalanced! Did senpai have underdeveloped motor skills?"

"Ah, Kaoru-sama is astute. Yes, for a period of time until Kyouya-sama realised that he could get more if he chose to move around more – books from the higher shelves, Master's business periodicals, Mistress's art supplies. Kyouya-sama's enjoyment of learning pushed him to do the physical activities needed to collect and study things like plants, rocks, animals."

Hotta takes over. "Tachibana-san and Aijima-san say that once Kyouya-sama waded into the pond while trying to catch a dragonfly and almost drowned, so Fuyumi-sama gave him the kitten stuffed toy to remind him that curiosity can kill the cat if the cat is not careful."

"Morbid!" Kaoru exclaims. "What a morbid lesson! I didn't know Fuyumi-san was the type to stop kids from being curious!"

"You don't understand, Kaoru-sama," Tachibana says. "Kyouya-sama's curiosity was too strong, irrepressibly strong, and it was putting him in a lot of danger. Another time, Kyouya-sama went in search of a missing puzzle piece and he wandered into the banquet hall by accident on an evening when Master was hosting a business function – luckily Kyouya-sama was short and he darted under the dinner table before any of the adults saw him. But when we realised he wasn't sleeping in his room, all the servants searched the grounds for him and we were so close to panic when one of the maids caught sight of Kyouya-sama's little foot underneath the tablecloth. Kyouya-sama spent the whole dinner sitting quietly and listening to the adults' conversations, and it was only after Master had gone to bed at around 3 AM that we were able to smuggle Kyouya-sama back into his room. Yet another time Kyouya-sama wandered off on his own – when we were in St Petersburg, no less – because he said he saw an artwork in a gallery that he wanted to inspect; Aijima and I almost lost our jobs for it and that's when Yuuichi-sama made the decision to hire another bodyguard if we were to cover it up from Master."

"Wow. I thought you three are infallible."

"No," Aijima says. "Kyouya-sama was the one who made us the team we are today. He identified our strengths and weaknesses and taught us how to coordinate with each other and with him."

Kaoru laughs wistfully. "Yeah, I know senpai is phenomenal – I can't do what he can."

"Don't say that, Kaoru-sama. Kyouya-sama has confidence in you," Hotta says encouragingly.

_That confidence is misplaced_, Kaoru thinks. Aloud, "Anyway, Hotta, yes of course we're doing something for Kyouya-senpai's birthday. I can't give you any details because I myself don't know what it is – apparently it's 'crazy' – as soon as I find out I'll send the information your way for you to arrange any security matters."

"Yes, that'll be good. Thank you, Kaoru-sama."

"No sweat. After hearing your stories, I think the kitten is a fantastic idea too – by all means, give it to him. It might help to distract him from Ootori-sama's matchmaking."

The three of them fall silent, which in and of itself is nothing extraordinary.

"What?" Kaoru prompts. "I've been with Kyouya-senpai long enough to recognise that particular brand of silence. Out with it."

He sees Aijima flick his eyes to the rearview mirror to take his cues from Tachibana.

Cutting to the chase, Kaoru directly asks, "Tachibana-san, what?"

"We believe… we may know who Master will nominate."

Kaoru jolts upright. "Who?!"

"It's a mere speculation, Kaoru-sama. Nothing has been decided."

"I'll take your speculations over other people's certainties any day, Tachibana-san. Out with it, now."

"Princess Michelle from the Kingdom of Monale."

Kaoru flinches backwards. "Oh my god. I had a bad feeling about her. No, it can't be her! Why her?! Of all people, why her?! Do you know who she looks like?! Do you know how cruel it is to Kyouya-senpai to have to marry someone who looks like Tono but isn't Tono?!"

"Kaoru-sama has met her before, have you not? You know that her country is suffering from financial recession."

"Yeah, but so are plenty of other countries!"

"Princess Michelle is loyal to her brother, the King, and she is very patriotic. She will agree to a financially advantageous match in exchange for giving Kyouya-sama's family a foothold in Europe from which they can expand their business. Monale is part of the European Medicines Agency and though it is small, it borders many key European countries and has always maintained good ties with all of them. If Kyouya-sama is appointed as a representative to the Management Board or even as the Executive Director of the Board, it will be very beneficial to the family. She is also unmarried and close to Kyouya-sama's age, and it would be a genuine privilege to marry her – Monale is one of the oldest monarchies in the world and her family's dynasty is one of the longest. With such a distinguished position, it'll be easy for Kyouya-sama to liaise with all the neighbouring countries; for example, Kyouya-sama is not a citizen of either France or Germany and it will be an uphill battle for him to gain sufficient public acceptance to wield parliamentary power in their democratic systems, but as a member of the royal house of Monale he will automatically gain access to the upper echelons of the power structure in Europe."

"I can see that. Yeah, I can see that, but is Ootori-sama really just going to give Kyouya-senpai away? To a country that's halfway around the globe?" Kaoru knows his distress is bleeding into his voice.

Aijima pulls up at the red light. Turning to face Kaoru solemnly, he says candidly, "Kaoru-sama, in the end Kyouya-sama is neither the heir nor the spare, is he?"

It may be counterintuitive to have a servant define the boundaries of their social civility, but Kaoru likes this side of Aijima – maybe it's the disparity in status that makes it undeniably tasteless for Kaoru to say certain things even if he thinks it, whereas Aijima's readiness to broach the subject frees Kaoru to openly discuss the issues as well. "Isn't that what we're trying to change, Aijima-san? I don't like this – it locks Kyouya-senpai into a separate power structure, as Tachibana-san says, and the distance can only harm his ability to influence the centre of the action."

"There's a flip side to this, Kaoru-sama: playing in a different arena might give Kyouya-sama the prominence he needs. Tachibana overheard Fuyumi-sama say that Kyouya-sama will naturally receive a peerage; Kyouya-sama already has a base of support in Japan because of Kaoru-sama and your friends – with a base of support overseas, Kyouya-sama will be impossible to disregard. As well, Fuyumi-sama has found an ace in the hole: Princess Michelle's elder brother is carrying on a clandestine, long-term relationship with a common woman. Monale's constitution prevents their royal family from marrying commoners, and as Kyouya-sama's bloodline qualifies him as foreign nobility while Princess Michelle is second in line to the throne – "

"Oh my god. They're going to try to force the king to abdicate for love?"

"It would be a simple matter to leak it to the press when the time is right," Tachibana affirms.

Kaoru releases his breath in a whistle with grudging awe. "And you say Fuyumi-san did all this?"

Hotta grins, teeth gleaming in the murky night. "Fuyumi-sama is not an Ootori for nothing."

Kaoru grins back. "Neither are you lot, apparently. With underlings like you three, the miracle is that Kyouya-senpai hasn't already won."

"You flatter us, Kaoru-sama," Tachibana demurs. "Yuuichi-sama's personal team is not to be written off."

"That reminds me – I wanted to ask you how I should go about forming my own team but I guess, yeah, you guys were lucky to be assembled together. Weird. I always assumed that Kyouya-senpai handpicked his own people."

Hotta perks up. "Kaoru-sama wants a personal team? We can help Kaoru-sama to find out whatever you want!"

Kaoru laughs appreciatively. "Thanks, Hotta, but it's not like you guys can report to two masters, right? Sooner or later I'll end up asking something of you that conflicts with your duties to Kyouya-senpai."

Hotta droops a little and the corners of Tachibana's lips actually quirk slightly.

"We _were_ lucky, Kaoru-sama. It is true that Kyouya-sama is excellent at working with the resources at his disposal, though I believe affinity and chemistry had a role that cannot be discounted. However if Kaoru-sama is interested, we can offer you some advice based on our observations of the methods our masters use to recruit servants."

"Yeah?" Kaoru beams. "Fire away."

"First, Kaoru-sama will want people who have preferably been in a profession that has given them a skill set that you can draw upon. It might not seem like a major consideration at the beginning but it may prove to be an unexpectedly lucrative investment later on."

Kaoru nods firmly. "I wholeheartedly agree. What did the three of you work as before working for Kyouya-senpai?"

"I was a nurse!" Hotta volunteers. "I was going for a job interview at one of the hospitals owned by Kyouya-sama's family – it was less than a week after Kyouya-sama had returned from St Petersburg and Fuyumi-sama brought him along to wait for Yuuichi-sama to finish his work so they could go out for dinner. Kyouya-sama was a very cute child, you know, Kaoru-sama, and I was surprised that he was reading classic literature at that age. I chatted with Kyouya-sama without knowing who he was and managed to make him laugh."

"How many times do we have to tell you? He was laughing at you, not with you, Hotta," Aijima says blandly.

Kaoru presses his lips together to ram his laughter back down his throat.

"Anyway, Kaoru-sama," Hotta goes on with the practised ease of a sentimental story, "during that conversation I mentioned to Kyouya-sama that I did extreme sports in my spare time and had good skills relating to survival in the wild, rock-climbing, sea and jungle navigation and so on – when Yuuichi-sama came out of his office, Kyouya-sama told him that I was suitable to be a bodyguard and after the interview Yuuichi-sama made me a different type of job offer."

"Cool! That's brilliant, Hotta! I never pegged you for an adrenaline junkie! Or a nurse, actually."

"Hotta was an outstanding nurse," Tachibana acknowledges. "He had the muscle to support and shift the patients and his work was scrupulous and detailed."

"Hotta," Kaoru smiles proudly, making him rub his bald head and blink rapidly in embarrassment.

"I was a police instructor," Aijima says. "That's the second thing that might benefit Kaoru-sama to know: it's good to look in the teaching or nursing professions, or any of the sectors where the people are woefully underpaid."

"That is clever! I'll take note of that, thank you."

"Lastly," Tachibana concludes, "with each new member that Kaoru-sama accepts, the number of criteria you use to assess them should increase. This is because the desired end result is a team that functions flawlessly, and each member must augment other members' strengths and compensate for their shortcomings. For example, Aijima is all IQ and no EQ while Hotta is all EQ and no IQ."

Hotta laughs at the comment – it tapers off as he ponders over it properly and receives no indications from Tachibana's face about whether or not it is a jest.

Kaoru claps a hand over his mouth. No wonder Hotta is the butt monkey of the group. After all these years, he still can't unequivocally spot the times when the others are being facetious.

Tachibana says, "Therefore when Kaoru-sama recruits, you would judge your first member against yourself, and the second member against the first member _and_ yourself, and so on and so forth."

"Yup, duly noted. What did Tachibana-san do before Kyouya-senpai?"

"I was born to serve Kyouya-sama," Tachibana replies with utmost sobriety.

"… O-Okay. Hey, do you guys know who forms Yuuichi-san's team?"

"No."

"Woah, not a good answer. Why don't you know?"

"It's easier for Yuuichi-sama to smudge the lines between regular employees and his personal team, Kaoru-sama," Hotta says. "Yuuichi-sama is in contact with many, many people everyday, and that's not counting Kiyomi-sama's personnel. Of course we keep track of the people who are most often around Yuuichi-sama and Kiyomi-sama – even small things like Kiyomi-sama hiring a new attendant maid around a month ago, we know; the more their contact hours, the more attention we pay to them."

"But if Kaoru-sama were to ask us to state with any precision the members of Yuuichi-sama's team, we can't."

"Whereas we are well-known to the family," Tachibana says.

"What does Kyouya-senpai think about this?"

"Kyouya-sama's instructions are only to continue keeping watch."

Kaoru sighs. "I think sometimes I… fall into the trap of thinking that Kyouya-senpai is indisputably _better_ and more capable as a person simply because I know him better."

"Most understandable, Kaoru-sama," Tachibana says leniently. "For those of us who have extensively observed the rest of the family, that assumption is swiftly disproven and thrown out. Kyouya-sama's two elder siblings are very powerful."

"I know overconfidence is a recipe for failure, but really, if you guys can't beat Akito-san I'd be terribly disappointed."

Politely, Tachibana restates, "Kyouya-sama's two elder siblings, Kaoru-sama."

"What, Fuyumi-san? Fuyumi-san loves Kyouya-senpai!"

"She also loves Yuuichi-sama," Hotta points out, "and she will take his side all throughout until and unless Kyouya-sama wins."

"You sure?" Kaoru asks dubiously.

"Yes," all three men answer with absolute conviction.

"Ehh?! What? Why?"

"Because it rightfully belongs to Yuuichi-sama," Aijima explains, not mincing his words as usual. "Fuyumi-sama is also Yuuichi-sama's sister. All things being equal, Yuuichi-sama is first in line as the recognised heir and Fuyumi-sama will never join forces with Kyouya-sama to challenge him. After all, Kyouya-sama is starting with nothing to lose and everything to gain while Yuuichi-sama's position is exactly reversed – if that is the case, if it comes down to the shares held by Fuyumi-sama to decide the majority, she will definitely give them to Yuuichi-sama since it will hurt Kyouya-sama less than Yuuichi-sama. Fuyumi-sama's support will switch to Kyouya-sama if and only if he becomes heir; Kyouya-sama knows this and he accepts it, Kaoru-sama."

"Yes, Kaoru-sama," Tachibana adds. "Even though Fuyumi-sama may eventually decide the outcome, this is not her fight. She alone can remain impartial and retain the favour of all three of her brothers."

"What an _awful _place to be in." Kaoru feels a pang of compassion for Fuyumi. "I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I did something like that to Fuyumi-san."

"You are doing something like that to Fuyumi-sama, Kaoru-sama," Tachibana says quietly. "So are we."

Thunderstruck, Kaoru gapes at him. _"Excuse me?"_

Tachibana meets his eyes gravely. "By virtue of having taken Kyouya-sama's side, we are contributing to the problem."

"But we're trying to make it _less_ of a problem! To minimise the damage!" Kaoru cries, even as he knows his protests ring hollow. Wars cannot happen without people to wage them.

Hotta looks away, nervous and sad.

They cruise along in a charged atmosphere, and at last Aijima breaks it.

"Nonetheless, we have chosen a side, Kaoru-sama."

"And you'll see it to the bitter end, come what may?" Kaoru laughs like bubbling acid. "Why are the three of you telling me this? I don't think there's a universe out there in which you'd _unintentionally_ say these bold and risky things. I'm not Kyouya-senpai but I'm not completely dumb. What's your motive? Say it straight, come on. Aijima-san, spill."

Hotta quickly replies, "No! No, Kaoru-sama! If we thought you were unintelligent we _wouldn't_ have said anything!"

"Is that why you're not saying anything now?" Kaoru asks tartly.

"Kaoru-sama…"

"What do you want from me?" Kaoru utilises his Kyouya-voice on them and removes his phone from his pocket. "Speak, or I call Kyouya-senpai right this instant. Aijima!"

They are visibly taken aback. Apprehensively, Hotta and Aijima look to Tachibana for guidance.

It goes without saying that Kyouya is on Kaoru's speed dial – Kaoru chooses to punch in the numbers by memory to stall for time. To his knowledge, this household is incomparable at weighing up the factors and making up their minds in an extremely short time frame. _One, two –_

"Kaoru-sama reminds me of Kyouya-sama's mother," Tachibana confesses, as close to blurting as Kaoru has ever seen him.

– _Yes._

Deliberately, Kaoru stills his fingers and evenly scrutinises the three bodyguards, his lips pursed meditatively.

"Ootori Okiko-sama passed away before any of you joined the household."

"Yes, Kaoru-sama."

"As a matter of fact, wasn't that why Tachibana-san was brought in to care for Kyouya-senpai, famously trouncing hundreds of women to become Kyouya-senpai's kind-of 'nanny'?"

"Yes, Kaoru-sama."

"Then? How would you know how she's like?"

"Mistress also had an artistic soul – it was from her that Kyouya-sama inherited his proficiency in art."

"Tachibana-san, there are endless artistic souls out there. In my family alone there's my grandmother, my mother, my brother. Not to mention, I don't see the relevance."

"Kaoru-sama, these innumerable artistic souls have no involvement with the Ootori family."

It takes more than _a whole minute_ for understanding to dawn.

Stupefied, his jaw drops.

"Tachibana-san, that was courageous to the point of foolhardy."

Tachibana dips his head in concession.

Kaoru can't believe it. It's too preposterous – it's _unthinkable_, yet here they are. Kyouya would've had their heads for this and they know it.

"Okay. I see. Okay," Kaoru allows. "You've bet so much on this, we should check that I've received the correct message loud and clear. You want me to know that my nature makes me ill-equipped to handle prolonged exposure to Kyouya-senpai's family, that I'm way in over my head, and you think it'll ruin me like it did Okiko-sama, don't you?"

Before Tachibana can open his mouth, Kaoru presses on with, "I know you know the implications of what you said. _All _of them."

There are people who've always been suspicious of the circumstances of Okiko-sama's death; heck, Kaoru's own grandmother believes that to be the Ootoris' skeleton in the closet. Their dominance in the medical field didn't help them any, especially as Okiko-sama died young and suddenly and everything about the wretched affair was so hushed and dignified. Kaoru hadn't known that the Ootori servants thought these conspiracy theories held any water. Does this mean that the Ootori children also think their mother met her end at the hands of their grandparents? It is a topic _never_ to be raised with Kyouya; none of the club members would dare. Haruhi probably has no idea whatsoever if she hadn't even known the chairman of their school.

_Huh._ Kaoru reflects upon it idly. _So many of us have Mummy issues, no wonder we're a bunch of problem kids._

"Yes, Kaoru-sama," Aijima says.

"Aijima-san…!" Hotta shushes him, arms flailing somewhat in agitated dismay.

Kaoru barks out a laugh. "Don't worry about it, Hotta. Thank you for your frankness, Aijima-san."

"Kaoru-sama, it's not about your competence! It's – "

"It's fine, Hotta," Kaoru assures again. "I get it."

"When Master came home today," Tachibana says abruptly, "he asked the maids if Kyouya-sama had any guests over. It is not good for you to become a target, Kaoru-sama. I would not have risked saying anything unless I was convinced it was in Kaoru-sama's best interests."

"Right, so _that's_ why you three have been strangely forthcoming with your information!" Sincerely, Kaoru says, "Thank you, Tachibana-san, I know you mean well. I'll stay out of the way and reduce my visits to the house – you shouldn't have to protect me at the same time you're protecting Kyouya-senpai – it diminishes your effectiveness. In exchange, you are willing to keep me updated. That's essentially the trade you're proposing?"

Tachibana bows, curving his back as much as the seatbelt will let him. "Truly, Kaoru-sama, with your every action and reaction you validate Kyouya-sama's choice."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Kaoru?"

"Hey, Daddy," Kaoru says, crawling up the enormous bed to settle himself right smack in the middle of it. He wriggles under the covers. "Long day for you and Mum?"

"Like you wouldn't believe." Yasuhiro lies back down again and closes his eyes wearily.

Kaoru follows his father's lead. "Me too."

A chuckle. "Don't grow up too soon, my son."

"Can't," Kaoru sighs. "I don't want to be left behind."

Yasuhiro cracks an eye open. "Who's leaving you behind?"

Kaoru shrugs; two seconds later he smiles. "… No one."

"My Kaoru." Yasuhiro grabs him for a hug. "Why do you look so sad?"

"… Nothing, Dad. It's nothing."

"That doesn't sound like nothing. Silly child, you lie like your mother."

"Mum's a superb liar! I've seen her!"

"Not to me she isn't," Yasuhiro declares.

Yuzuha emerges from the bathroom in a nightrobe with a hairbrush in hand. "That's why I married you, darling."

She props a knee on the bed to enable her to drop a kiss on Kaoru's forehead. "We'd never leave you behind, sweetie. _Never_."

"I know," Kaoru answers. "Mum, what would you have done if Hikaru and I sucked at fashion?"

She blinks, startled. "What a question! Of course, I'd find out what you like and what you're good at and we'd proceed from there!"

"If we sucked at everything?"

"That's not likely, sweetie."

"If we were only average at everything?"

Both his parents stare at him.

"Kaoru, where are these questions coming from?"

"Nowhere," he says, bringing the blankets up to his chin. "Everyone's tired, let's sleep."

Yuzuha wrestles the blankets out of his grip and pulls them down before he manages to finish his sentence.

"… Look, Mum, Dad, don't read too much into it. I was just curious."

"Yes, you were just curious, but that sort of curiosity poisons your mind," Yuzuha tells him sternly. "You think Mummy doesn't understand insecurity? All true creatives are constantly battling with themselves, that is what makes their art great!"

"Mum…" Kaoru whines.

"Don't 'Mum' me with that adorable expression! I know your tricks, sweetie. Does this have something to do with your friends? Perhaps we shouldn't have consented to having you as our liaison with your club? You're always censoring yourself, sweetie, it's annoying. I think I'll ask Kyouya-kun to continue as our liaison."

"Wha – ?!" Kaoru sits up. "You can't, Mum! He's busy! And – what the hell, does senpai tell you everything? He was the one who said we have to choose _judiciously_ the information we give the parents!"

"Is it Haruhi-kun, then?"

"No! Where'd you get the idea?!"

"Tamaki-kun?"

"No! It has nothing to do with them!"

"Hmm, yes, you made up with Tamaki-kun, didn't you? It can't be Mitsukuni-kun or Takashi-kun, can it? I thought they're delightful children who never cause troub – "

"Mum, stop guessing! It's not them, it's me! I think stupid thoughts all the time, okay?! Hikaru always says – hold on, you know we had a fight? Who told you?"

"Don't say that about yourself, Kaoru," Yasuhiro chides.

"And how come you know we made up? That happened just this morning!"

"The phone was ringing off the hook yesterday. Tamaki-kun said he was trying to reach Hikaru because you'd argued, and before you came home earlier he rang again for Hikaru sounding much happier." Yuzuha clicks her tongue. "I do wish you wouldn't exclude us from your lives, Kaoru. Neither you nor Hikaru said a word."

"It was over something trivial, Mum. An idiotic misunderstanding," Kaoru laments. "I can't tell you _everything_."

"I see we have vastly differing interpretations of 'trivial', sweetie."

"Mother, you're being impossi – "

"What is trivial to you? Falling in love with the same girl as your brother, is that trivial?"

Kaoru's thoughts derail and crash spectacularly, leaving him dumbfounded.

"Yuzuha dear," Yasuhiro says soothingly, caressing her arm.

She snorts and goes to the bathroom to replace her brush.

Blankly, Kaoru turns to his father, who merely clasps his shoulder comfortingly.

Yuzuha appears again, emanating the stubborn vibe that Hikaru gets when he's pissed off. "You know what? No, darling, I won't let it go. I'm furious, Kaoru. Absolutely furious. Believe me, I had half a mind to demand that Yuzuru-san expel the girl."

Kaoru gasps in horror. "Mum, you didn't!"

"What reason do I have not to?"

"It wasn't her fault! That's – Mum, it's – don't – she didn't make us fall for her or anything like that!"

"And how was I to know?" Yuzuha's eyes shine with the satisfaction of having sprung a trap on her prey. "_How was I to know_, Kaoru? The both of you falling for the same person? I naturally feared that this girl must have played my sons – is that illogical? You're in the same class, same extra-curricular activity, her family is financially challenged – what was I to think? Without knowledge of the inside story, what should I have thought of this situation, you tell me."

"You've met her before! You met her! Haruhi isn't that sort of person!"

"I will make _no such assumption_ about anyone who wants to date my children," Yuzuha pronounces, parental and deadly. "Do you understand, Kaoru? Yasuhiro and I have given you and Hikaru the freedom to marry for love, but do not expect me to assume the best of anyone who is romantically associated with either of you, do not imagine that we won't test their characters, and most of all, do not assume that I will show any mercy to anyone who hurts either of you, _whether or not they are to blame for it_."

At this moment, his mother is the woman who'd climbed to the top of the savage fashion world, and Kaoru is really, really, pants-wettingly frightened.

"If it was not for the fact that Kyouya-kun is ridiculously good at implying things, your father and I wouldn't have heard a word of it. When I made inquiries and found out, within five minutes I had concocted about ten plans which would have destroyed that girl's future, and yes I knew Yuzuru-san's boy was in love with her as well but you'd better trust that every single one of my plans would have worked."

"Yes, Mother," Kaoru squeaks timidly. "I'm sorry, Mother."

"We are not attempting to interfere with your lives, Kaoru," Yasuhiro says gently. "You have not struck a proper balance about what matters are serious and what are not. Spare a thought for how we feel when we have to be told by other people that our children have fallen in love."

"I'm sorry." Kaoru hangs his head, fisting the sheets. "It was so hard to say… so painful."

Yuzuha exhales heavily. "I know you're a very indirect person, sweetie. It's precisely because you're so indirect that I find it hard to accept that you can't find oblique methods to tell us instead."

Kaoru apologises again and is gathered up in his mother's arms.

"I'm sorry too, my Kaoru. I'm so sorry it didn't work out for you or Hikaru, and I'm sorry I wasn't there to help you in any way at all."

"Don't… Don't, Mum. Don't feel guilty," Kaoru pleads in a strangled tone. Now he realises it must have killed his mother to learn of their heartbreak from second-hand sources, and with her overactive imagination – her most valuable gift to Kaoru, and he knows how it feels to think himself to madness – it must have been hell.

"How can I not?" she whispers.

"I've moved past it. It's history."

"Then who are you trying so hard to catch up to? Who are you trying to prove yourself to, if not her?"

Kaoru leans back to look her fully in the face, convulsing with laughter. "My senpais! Mother, I'm trying to catch up to my _senpais_, not a lost love! I think it might be more difficult to prove myself to them than to a potential love interest, because Kyouya-senpai's standards are sky high. _Stratospheric_, Mother. He's a punishing taskmaster."

"Isn't Kyouya-kun pleased with what you've done thus far? You're not giving yourself enough credit, Kaoru."

"I want to do more!" Kaoru admits. "Today I just discovered that Kyouya-senpai, Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai have already started to move! I don't even know _what_ they're doing or_ how_ they're doing it! Fine, Kyouya-senpai and Honey-senpai revealed a bit, though Kyouya-senpai won't say what Mori-senpai is doing! They took the opportunity when we were preoccupied with Haruhi, how ingenious is that! I know I can do more, Mother."

"Ah." Yuzuha nods knowingly. "Good. I'm glad you're inspired and challenged by the people who surround you."

"You can do it, Kaoru," Yasuhiro spurs him on, surreptitiously casting a glance at his wife.

Some form of mental correspondence is interchanged between his parents.

"Oh man, not you guys too," Kaoru groans. "Does _everyone_ know something I don't? Am I _that_ backward?"

"Kaoru, you know," Yasuhiro says, loving and kind, "you're making much more headway than you think. For those of us who can see the big picture, who have retained perspective about your progress, it is…"

"Marvellous, sweetie."

"Impressive, yes. That you've scratched the surface of it – in itself that is an accomplishment."

"Your organisational skills have improved tremendously, your attitude towards work is commendable, and your thirst to improve gratifies me the most."

"As a reward, your mother and I will provide some… 'arrows', shall we say? To point you in the right direction. You are aware that Takashi-kun is doing law in order to strengthen and supplement Mitsukuni-kun's business ability, don't you? And Kyouya-kun is also business-oriented. Law in itself can be a business; however, that is not Takashi-kun's goal. Therefore, if Takashi-kun is making any moves, then…?"

"Ehh…?"

"To become a lawyer, qualifications and traineeships are needed – Takashi-kun needs to follow the procedures and it can't be rushed. Again, Kaoru – therefore, if Takashi-kun is moving _now_, it must be for business, and if he is moving for business…?"

"It must be for somebody else's business!" Kaoru yelps. "Honey-senpai's, is it? But why the unnecessary secrecy? Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai are direct heirs, they have nothing to fear!"

Unless…

"Is Mori-senpai moving on behalf of Kyouya-senpai? That's too obvious, though! Totally different sectors! Everyone'd see through it in a flash if Mori-senpai starting buying shares in healthcare!"

"Are there no connections at all?"

"… Huh? This begs the question, Daddy, how do _you_ know? Shit, you mean everyone on earth knows that Kyouya-senpai wants to be heir? How – how come?! I thought we – "

_That's – ! That's an overt smirk!_

"No. _No_, Kaoru, take it easy. As far as I'm aware, no one outside of your circle of friends knows; no one would suspect such a daring action – you still have the element of surprise on your side."

"You and Mother know!" Kaoru wrings his hands, aggrieved.

"Only because Kyouya-kun believes that you and Hikaru will side with him, sweetie. Is he wrong?"

"That shouldn't even be in doubt, Mother! What does that have to do with – !"

_No. _

_No no no no no._

"_We're_ mixed up in this?! He actually approached you guys for help?!"

"Not quite… but like your mother said, the boy is absurd at the art of implication, enough for me to have a fair grasp on what your friends are planning."

"Daddy!" Kaoru yells, appalled.

"Don't shout, sweetie."

"You two have been giving me a hard time about not saying anything, and now I find out about _this_?!"

"We aren't going to _do_ anything. Kyouya-kun knows better than to expect us to. I'll spare you the anguish of having to unravel Kyouya-kun's double-talk and tell you the gist of it: his very persuasive sales pitch ran along the lines of how studies have shown that groups of friends, especially close-knit ones, have a high probability of enjoying the same level of success and contentment in life; the related benefits to you and Hikaru of having his family's might behind you; the odds of you and Hikaru rallying around him; the depth of your friendship – all this, in exchange for mere silence on our parts."

"Why would Kyouya-senpai need your silence?! He could have simply _not said anything_!"

"Exactly, sweetie. Why?" His mother's eyes glow at him devilishly.

"I have no intention of either supporting the status quo or in supporting Kyouya-kun if a coup occurs," Yasuhiro says. "I'm sitting on the fence, as I should – it's a good fence. Tall. Great view of the neighbours' backyards."

Kaoru's parents chortle away blithely.

"What is going on?!"

"Figure out the connection that links our family to Kyouya-kun's family to Mitsukuni-kun's dreams and you will know what Takashi-kun has been doing. That's all we're giving you, sweetie. Good night."

Nonchalantly, both his parents hem him in from the sides of the bed and flick the lamps off while Kaoru howls his objections.

He jumps on them and bothers them like he did once upon a decade. Eventually, when a yawn nearly unhinges his jaw, he reluctantly flops onto the pillow and tries to bore a hole through the back of his father's head.

His father pulls the blanket over his head.

Kaoru doesn't remember how his restlessness switched to fatigue. The next thing he knows he is drifting off with his thoughts jumbled up.

Racing. Fashion – haha! Honey-senpai wants cars, not horses… Though senpai is awesome at the equestrian arts…

Flowers. Resorts. Spa – maybe!

Martial arts. Fitness… Fitness Centre?

Toys. Software. Art? That might work! Designing electronic toys. Wait, Okiko-sama's family was –

Kaoru shoots upright wildly, his eyes fly open and he has to resist the urge to scream or laugh like a maniac. _YES!_

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><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) In case you haven't figured it out, Kyouya is cold-natured – that is why he constantly feels colder than the average person in a room of the same temperature, has cold hands, and wakes up feeling like crap. He gets cold shivers from sleep deprivation – there are people who have this problem in real life although there is no actual name for it: when they don't get enough sleep at night, they wake up freezing, with goosepimples and chills all day even in the height of summer. Now you know why his mood is so foul.

(b) The Rhinemaidens' song is from the opening of Das Rheingold, which is in turn the opening of Der Ring des Nibelungen, Wagner's Ring Cycle, an epic story that concludes with Götterdämmerung (or, Twilight of the Gods). The term 'Götterdämmerung' is occasionally used to refer to a disastrous conclusion of events. LOL… it was so subtle in the story but I've just made it an anvil-sized hint, haven't I? OTL

Kaoru is a Puccini boy, by the way; and Hikaru's favourite opera is Carmen. ^_^ But_ of course_.

(c) Kaoru's passion for perfumery and relevant character insights are contained in my other fic, 'Assorted Ouran Shorts', Chapter 6: Signature Scent. Of course, Kaoru's name means 'fragrance', or 'perfume'. It's a one-shot, gen, no pairing. It is not necessary for you to read it because I have ensured that 1-7th contains all that is needed for you to understand it, although I admit I'd like you to read it. Please? :D

(d) Baby!Kyouya, why are you so cute? For those of you who have read the manga and watched the anime – the artistic part of Kyouya obviously exists in the anime only. I know that I fluctuate between following strict manga canon and strict anime canon, but I hope you can see that I am trying to tie them into a coherent whole, as my goal is to use both to draw out a vivid Ouran world. Kyouya's artistic side is important because I have used it to flesh out the character of his mother.

(e) I have never liked underestimating Kyouya's siblings for 2 big reasons: 1) Kyouya himself mentions that they never fail to meet Yoshio's standards, and since we know Yoshio's standards are high, this must indicate that they are extremely competent people; 2) Villains make the story. Stupid villain = stupid story.

(f) If there is something I dislike more than underestimating Kyouya's siblings, it's underestimating the parental units of the Host Club. People don't get to where they are and manage to stay there without the killer instinct.

As well, although Kaoru's father told Haruhi that he and his wife kind of neglected the children, other scenes show that the twins love their parents very much – I've always thought that the reason underlying the twins' malicious behaviour towards others is because their parents spoilt them and not because of the neglect. That is, the parents felt guilty about not spending enough time with them, and consequently were too lax with discipline and let them get away with everything; parents who spoil children are actually more likely to cultivate mean-spirited children because the children don't know the boundaries. I think Yuzuha and Kazuha, although the type to tease their offspring endlessly, will _take down_ anyone who even thinks of messing with their babies – that sort of attitude where only _they_ are allowed to bully their progeny.

(g) I also dislike underestimating the servants. LOLOLOL can you see where this is going? Simply because people are domestic help does not make them unintelligent (Shima-san, I love you!). More often than not, humans are wise when they speak less (Mori-senpai, I love you!) – hence, who in a household has the most ample opportunities to observe the game as it is played out? You see, household staffs are the ones who wash the family linen, dirty or otherwise ;)

Further, TeamKO have demonstrated in canon their ability to see through their Kyouya-sama; see: manga Chapter 54 page 7, where TeamKO essentially indicated that they knew all along that Kyouya's aim in searching for Tamaki's mother was because he wanted to do something special for Tamaki, and that he was "showing his soft side".

(h) The name 'Okiko' is carefully chosen (just like 'Yasuhiro', the twins' father's name). I know some people don't like it when fanfic writers add in details of their own, but believe me that my attitude is one of indebtedness and gratitude towards the original work, and there is no way I could have written 1-7th without these details. Therefore I have endeavoured to add as much meaning to enrich it.

Kyouya's mother's name is Ichijo Okiko (一条 · 興子).

This surname is very prestigious – it is one of Japan's go-seike (五摂家), the five regent houses, which were the most politically powerful amongst the court officials of the Imperial Court. It is also the family name of the Uki-Doki Memorial character that Renge is in love with – Ichijo Miyabi. I thought it was a very funny aside and when combined with the honourable connotations and the pleasant tonal flow when read with the personal name, I decided on that maiden name for Kyouya's mother. In fact, I was totally going to include a scene in which Haruhi finds out that Kyouya's mother's name was Ichijo and she's like omg you really are Renge's Miyabi-kun and Kyouya's glasses flash at her threateningly and Haruhi shuts up while the twins try not to laugh.

'Okiko' was the personal name of Empress Meishō, one of eight women to ascend Japan's Chrysanthemum Throne in her own right. The kanji means 'merry, spirited child". Randomly, an analysis of the name says this –

The name of Okiko has given you an appreciation for many beautiful and refined aspects of life – music and art, literature, drama – and the outdoors, where you find much peace and relaxation, but it creates a far too sensitive nature. You sense and feel much that you do not understand, and sometimes you are alarmed at your thoughts and wonder about their origin. You rarely experience the tranquillity that comes with stability of thinking or emotional control. The name Okiko creates the urge to be self-expressive and philosophical, but we point out that it limits self-expression and friendly congeniality thereby creating loneliness. This name, when combined with the last name, can frustrate happiness, contentment, and success, as well as cause health weaknesses in the liver, bloodstream, heart, lungs and bronchial area.

– which is so immediately _perfect _for her that I had to use it. Seriously, I'd decided on that characterisation even before I chose the name and before I knew that the name had these associated meanings.

(i) I don't think it is far-fetched to have Haruhi be ignorant about lots of things about the others. It is from this angle that I include all of the details to further flesh out the Ouran world – because Kaoru is an insider, and Kaoru is a curious person who always wants to know more. As the manga and anime are from Haruhi's point of view, we are limited to what she knows, and my personal belief is that _she knows frightfully little_. Kyouya himself tells her this in Chapter 28, page 19: "Even the twins… not to mention Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai. We got together with the intent to make use of each other. Well… There are a lot of things you don't know about us."

Part of the issue, I think, is Haruhi's disinterest in learning more. She doesn't feel the need to pry into people's lives, she's not a gossip nor is she looking to gain leverage over other people; I don't think she understands just how much what she doesn't know can hurt her – annihilate her and her prospects, actually. She knows that she doesn't know, but that doesn't make her scramble to find out more. Of the club, the most naïve members are Haruhi and Tamaki, and Tamaki's innocence is eroded a little from his life events.

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Acknowledgements

Thank you to everyone who read this. Your voices have been heard – this will probably be the last long chapter. The only reason I'm posting it at this length is because I'd already written more than half of it when I asked the question last chapter, and I thought I'd just put it all up for you. I'll chop up 1-7th into smaller sections from here on out, and maybe the day might come where I can put it back together in its proper chapters and in a large file for your download.

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At long last, I can do this:

My Colours

**My Ouran kinks: **

(1) **General**: SENPAI POWERRR (Honey, Mori, Kyouya); lethal parents; funny servants; interesting side/minor characters; elderly persons power (Kazuha and Shizue, here's looking at you); unexpected dynamics rather than sticking to the tried and tested established relationships; white team versus red team dichotomy – see below: Manifesto for To Become One Seventh.

Senpai Power is too formidable and scary; when I see them having tea together (e.g. Chapter 44, page 105; Chapter 45, page 20) I just feel a cold chill. Who knows what sorts of things they discuss?

(2)** Kaoru**: lost in reverie, creative mode, business mode, a creature of imagination, thoughtful, scheming, insecure, manipulative, self-sacrificial, self-aware, filled with inner strength, flexible and adaptive therefore almost impossible to break although he looks soft and giving like an easy target.

I like a Kaoru that embodies the qualities that many creative spirits have: the distinctive vision, the uncompromising focus, plagued by insecurity, expects the impossible, lost in dreams, has a mercurial nature and a disarming fragility.

That fragility, _oh_. Just look at Kaoru when he smiles: Chapter 50, pages 25-27; Chapter 52, bottom of page 9, bottom of page 24, middle of page 26; Chapter 53, top of page 7, bottom of page 8, bottom of page 11, page 24, 25; and of course the classic ones where he gazes at Haruhi: Chapter 51, bottom of page 24, top of page 26.

(3)** Kyouya**: business mode, medical mode, blood type AB mode, move-the-world-for-you mode, protective, Machiavellian, intense, 'fiery guy', easy-going and obliging most of the time especially in his roles as club VP or senior to his juniors, strong to the point where he's almost impossible to break but brittle as a result and once broken stays broken.

(4)** Honey**: über powerful and dangerous, intense, unpredictable, ambitious, seeing and knowing everything, doing and saying things for the hell of it, doomed to his transcendent knowledge, sometimes crosses the line or goes overboard, deep, enigma, alienish super Honey, AB split personality mode.

(5)** Mori**: intelligent and wise, loyal, steady as a rock, seeing and knowing everything, suspecting things before the others but not saying anything, speaks when needed, soft and familial side, protective, blue-screen-of-death moments, connects well with everyone.

(6) I like my Haruhi blunt and snarky, pushed to the brink where she has to shout or hit the other club members like when the twins fought, and uncaring of material worldly things; and a Hikaru who swings from asshole to ideal brother to asshole to ideal brother constantly to annoy Kaoru, and can do the switch in one second flat. Of course when I say 'asshole', I don't mean that he is nasty to Kaoru, but that he does things that he knows will aggravate his brother because he thinks it's funny. Obviously, because Kaoru does the same thing to him too – twin banter and all that jazz. I also like a brave and protective Hikaru with a good, strong heart.

**My dislikes:**

(1) Shallow interpretations; character-warping behaviour without a sufficient basis to justify it.

(2) Self-pitying Kaoru: he knew that he did not feel as strongly towards Haruhi as Hikaru did because he could see that he did not get jealous of Tamaki. I think it should not be ignored that Kaoru was calm and accepting when Honey went to look for him after hearing the news – Honey had thought that Kaoru would be devastated, but Kaoru's reaction shows incredible maturity and self-knowledge. He's not making himself a martyr – he's coming to a decision after careful consideration. To make him pity himself or to make him fall into a great depression is not doing him credit.

Further, I have always thought of the notion of Kaoru giving up Haruhi to his brother a bit stupid – that is, choosing Hikaru over Haruhi. I feel that not enough emphasis is given to what Kaoru says in Chapter 53 pages 10-11, and I quote: "Hikaru, you know, concerning Haruhi, I wasn't as jealous of Tono as you. […] If I had been in your place at the amusement park, I don't think I would have been hurt. […] But, I am sure, I don't have such strong feelings that I want her all to myself."

These lines are hugely significant. Look at the drawings of Kaoru's face – he wasn't lying when he said them. This means that Kaoru acknowledges that although he loves Haruhi, there are people out there who feel more strongly for her than he does despite the fact that he was the one to take action to ask Haruhi out. It also means that Kaoru possesses the ability to identify love where it exists, and he knows that there are different _degrees_ of love. The day that Kaoru gets insanely jealous, the day that his heart breaks over someone, the day where he wants someone (or someones, as the case may be) all to himself – that's going to be it.

(3) Lack of understanding about Mori's silence: most of the time Mori _truly has no verbal response_. This is a _fact_. He is thinking over what other people have said and he has processed it in his mind – he listens, and then it's like… okay, full stop. When he thinks he needs to give some response like a human being, he makes those single sound responses. Most of the time it is because: 1) No response; 2) Doesn't think a response is needed; 3) Doesn't care. This is why Mori is always the listening figure – people know they can talk to him because he doesn't make the effort to give elaborate staged answers. In situations where people want a response or when they're seeking advice or if they're simply the sort who gains satisfaction from getting an answer, then refer to 2): when Mori types realise that the situation calls for a detailed response, _they do_. I cannot stress this enough. Mori types generally see right through people's social chatting and they understand a lot cerebrally, even if they may not possess the ability or inclination to put it in words.

(4) Lack of understanding and complete disregard for the twin relationship: in a choice between the twin and the love of one's life, any twin will always pick their twin. ALWAYS. Research studies conducted by National Geographic and other related science bodies have consistently received this feedback from twins: that they can always find another love, but they will only ever have this one twin. Partners of twins have also consistently reported that they are absolutely not able to criticise their partner's twin at all. This means that anyone who wants to date either Kaoru or Hikaru will have to gain the approval of the other twin, no matter what a hotshot character it is, no matter how smooth or slick, no matter how powerful – it means zilch to Hikaru unless Hikaru thinks this character loves Kaoru and is good for him. And don't think any character will be able to bypass that approval, either, because Kaoru _won't_ be saying to his brother 'deal with it, I'm sticking with this person whether or not you like it'. No. What Kaoru will be saying to _his potential partner_ is 'you've gotta find some way to make Hikaru like you, please, this is important to me'.

But, if the potential partner can't already tell, Kaoru likely wouldn't be with this person in the first place. Also, if Hikaru knows that Kaoru fancies that person, Hikaru will try to give way.

_Because Hikaru loves Kaoru AS MUCH AS Kaoru loves him._

My main problem with this is the character assassination of Hikaru, since he is canonically the less sensitive twin. There is no universe in which he will hurt Kaoru willingly. None. Not even once in any given universe. If it is inadvertent, the instant he finds out he will grovel and beg for Kaoru's forgiveness. This extends to and includes situations in which he feels angry with Kaoru – he will not ever, ever say words that are obviously hurtful and callous to his twin. Hikaru may shout at Kaoru for being stupid, but he will not _make_ him feel stupid and useless and unwanted. There is no universe in which Hikaru will neglect Kaoru willingly. There is no universe in which Hikaru will stop loving Kaoru. There is no universe in which Hikaru can live without Kaoru even if they have both found separate partners. It is canon that Hikaru knows when Kaoru is lying, and he doesn't let Kaoru get away with it (Chapter 45 page 28). The reason that Hikaru decided to pursue Haruhi in the manga is because Kaoru explained things to him and gave him the permission to do so, not because Hikaru prioritised Haruhi over Kaoru.

As such, stories that start off with one-sided Kaoru to Hikaru and proceed to Kaoru/someone else tend not to work for me. I don't think they are believable because they ignore this most basic, _basic_ aspect of being twins. Worse, when Kaoru finds a partner who reciprocates his feelings, it is like carte blanche to have Hikaru behave like a jerk to make this partner seem like the better person, to have this partner understand Kaoru better. To be honest, I have very strong opinions on these types of portrayals, and they just seem lazy to me. It makes me _rage_ at the injustice to the characters, and the fury is too much for me to contain in private, that is why I have to splash it out on this currently 100K+ words and counting fic.

Part of my motivation for writing 1-7th (and all my other fics, really) is to show that it is possible to have Kaoru fall in love without cheapening his relationship with either Hikaru or Haruhi. Indeed, because it is an OT7 fic, so Kaoru gets to love Hikaru and Haruhi as well – however, at this point in time Kaoru is well on his way to loving other people, yet he has managed to keep Hikaru and Haruhi at a foremost position in his life, and they don't need to abuse or neglect him for him to love someone else. Even if I change the pairing of this fic into Kaoru/someone else, the overall fic could still turn out right, I think. At every point of my writing I judge myself with this: are the people who are important to Kaoru still important to him? And, is Kaoru still important to the people who love him? I never let myself lose sight of this, and that is why I feel extremely validated and delighted if and when any of you readers think that this fic is 'believable' or 'canon' or 'in character'. It restores my faith to have people respect this relationship; it is an integral part of Kaoru and Hikaru – to respect the twin relationship is to respect them, to love them is to love the twin relationship.

(5) Hate sentiment or derogatory language towards the host club customers. I think the manga went out of its way to show us the good relationship between the hosts and their customers – look at how the customers rallied around Tamaki to get him to the airport on time. These princesses are powerful too, and yes, I know that not all of the hosts treat them with utmost sincerity (Kyouya and twins) though even those three are on friendly terms with the customers. I just don't get why so many people seem to feel the need to use condescending terms to describe them, which flies in the face of the original work since the customers have been nearly all well-behaved and lovely people. As most Ouran fic writers are female, it kills me, really. Ladies, why so much hate and contempt for your own kind?

I mention this specifically because I know that Princess Michelle drew a fair bit of hate in the original chapters (38-39). Trust me, please. I have this fic planned all the way out till the end, and I know who she's going to end up with. It's a little bit cute and a little bit silly and everything that a fluffy romance should be – I only hope you like it as much as I already do. I always thought Michelle was a hilarious character (Chapter 39, page 19 – her face omg hahaha), and I know which other (equally hilarious) character's life she can have a positive impact on.

Now, as promised:

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Manifesto for To Become One Seventh

**Kaoru as lead character**

Kaoru is – to me – undisputedly the best perspective from which to write a story. Honey, Mori and Kyouya already know everything, Hikaru may or may not care, Tamaki has very narrow concerns, Haruhi has the original work – while Kaoru is the scrambler, the worrier, with a large helping of shrewdness, consideration, empathy, insight, protectiveness, all coupled with the skill and ingenuity to research what he wants to know.

In the manga, Kaoru's world expanded hugely, but I feel like he mostly carried and supported himself through it with a little bit of help from Honey. In terms of direct contribution to Kaoru's growth, Honey is possibly the only person who intentionally assisted Kaoru. From the middle till the end of the manga, Kaoru was left to fend for himself a lot because he saw so much, and he tried to be strong and overly so – as such he is a chronic sufferer of the Do Too Much Syndrome. He became the one to support Hikaru through the process of muddling through his feelings, and Hikaru in turn supported Tamaki through it. This is why I have always felt that Kaoru has a great deal of dormant potential that should be explored.

If Kaoru were to exercise that power locked within himself, would he eventually be the person to hold the club together? He has all of the ingredients along with an insane level of devotion. For example, he never lied to himself about his feelings. He felt it early and he actually didn't run away from it, merely keeping it asleep and letting himself go along with the flow. However, all along he had been steadying himself for the day where he'd have to face them. This is in marked difference from the way that Tamaki, Haruhi and Hikaru reacted to their feelings.

Kaoru is also gentle with people (tactful, I mean), in a way that Tamaki is/can be but Hikaru, Kyouya and Haruhi aren't (the first two because they sometimes don't care to be gentle, and Haruhi because she's just so blunt sometimes); he is perceptive and patient like Honey and Mori, able to wait for things to run their course.

As an aside, the Kaoru that is seen in the Volume 18 extras was in my mind before I saw him drawn on the page. Honest to goodness, I'm not lying. 1-7th's Kaoru was always going to end this story with that almost shoulder-length, gracefully loose hairstyle to finish off his image. It's beautiful; it really fits him.

**Using Kyouya's story to form the backbone of 1-7th**

I understand why Hatori-sensei is reluctant to set Kyouya's future in concrete. It's much easier to talk about how the other club members will end up because their futures are clear and straightforward.

Kyouya is different. I think that the mangaka recognises that Kyouya's story is one in which people will inevitably get hurt. She has dropped several rather obvious hints about who will eventually inherit the Ootori zaibatsu, and we all know who she _wants_ to be heir – I think it is reasonable, this reluctance to come out and actually create that future for Kyouya since it is very complex and requires taking many factors into account. In the mangaka's vision of the future, she mostly provided us with things that we should already have known were going to take place – things we should have been able to predict from what we know of the characters with a few scattered surprises.

The resolution of Kyouya's story isn't going to be sunshine and rainbows like Tamaki's. It naturally veers off into things that will be sad and harsh, the way life can only be in such a family – the mangaka will have to go into shades and shadows that Ouran was never meant for in order to stay true to the foundation she'd laid out. This is a compelling argument against fleshing it out.

In 1-7th, since it is the whole point to draw out Kyouya's story, it will come to a definite end.

**Building on the White/Red dichotomy**

My favourite Ouran arc is the sports festival arc: Chapters 46-49 inclusive. It is the single arc that has inspired me the most and informs the entirety of 1-7th – in that arc, the established characterisation is glowing and the further development of the characters just leaves one gobsmacked.

Of particular relevance is splitting of the club members into two teams for the festival: White (Kaoru, Kyouya, Honey) and Red (Mori, Haruhi, Hikaru, Tamaki). I cannot know if the mangaka deliberately created such a dichotomy – the signs appear to point to it. Regardless, these observations hold true even if it was not premeditated.

'White Team, Fight!' means something like, 'Go, White Team!' It is a cheer, an expression of support and unity. They are not fighting in the sense of an argument like the original title 'The Twins Fight!' in the anime.

**White Team**

The White Team is 'white' on the surface but 'black' on the inside – they are the ones who are ruthless, manipulative and devious.

It is composed of the top students of the school (Chapter 47, page 4). They are obviously the schemers – their meeting consists of them sitting around conference tables 'studying data of both the Red and White Teams' members'. There is a cold efficiency and a concentrated effort towards the target of winning. They catalogue the discrete events to decide how to apply themselves to it and like all good tacticians they assess the Red Team's likely strategy (or lack thereof) as well. Knowing that the Red Team has the advantage in athletic power, they think up various plans to exploit their opponent's weaknesses. In the Festival itself, their strengths become evident; while Kyouya is directly responsible for these 'atrocious tactics' (Tamaki's words), the rest of the White Team supports it heartily and helps in the execution of these plans.

**Red Team**

In contrast, the Red Team's meeting is dominated by concepts such as 'spirit and teamwork', 'passion and a united power'. Their members are mentally and emotionally boosted by sincere, heartfelt encouragement – something that the White Team belittles and dismisses when they tell the Red Team to 'just do your best with your friendship and your vigorous power!' (Chapter 46, last page).

**Why it is significant**

The difference in approaches is critical because all of the club members are in precisely the team that suits their personality type. Although not fully accurate, one way to label this difference is: White Team is all mind, Red Team is all heart. Or, White Team is ruled by their heads, Red Team is ruled by their hearts.

The White Team is calculating – something that K, K and H are, unlike the other four. Purely in terms of academic rankings, K, K and H are higher-ranked than their Red Team counterparts. In terms of clarity of thought and overall perceptiveness, the White Team's members also outdo the Red with far greater frequency and speed (with the exception of Mori, but Mori is in Red partly because he doesn't possess the required evil edge to his character, and partly because Mori too is defined by strong emotions, e.g. loyalty).

For example, realise that while Kaoru figured out Tamaki's objectives himself, Hikaru and Haruhi need to be told by Tamaki. Hikaru and Haruhi were also spurred into action when they discovered the emotional basis of Tamaki's actions in pushing for the sports festival (i.e. that Tamaki was doing it for Kyouya and not for self-satisfaction). Kaoru's decision to stay in the White Team when Hikaru was trying to force a switch for Kaoru to be in the Red Team is another instance of Kaoru letting his head rein over his heart.

This split means that while the Red Team members are able to overwhelm the White Team members with feelings, generally the show is run by the White Team and K, K and H get their way most of the time.

**Similarities: Kaoru, Kyouya and Honey**

It is this connection that gives 1-7th its potential, the reason why I chose to specially capitalise on these relationships: Kaoru-Kyouya, Kaoru-Honey, Kyouya-Honey.

These three characters favour the passive-aggressive approach. They have fewer scruples than the other club members, with a more pronounced willingness to wade into morally ambiguous areas. They organise the circumstances in order to get what they want, and it is to their credit that they nearly always succeed. They have a tendency of crossing the line if left unchecked; hence, their Red counterparts serve the important function of holding them back. See:

Kaoru lets his thoughts run away from himself occasionally, and the most famous incident where Kaoru totally cut loose his manipulative side was when he brought Haruhi to the amusement park and in one fell swoop positioned everyone where he wanted them – Hikaru rightly gets angry that Kaoru 'abused and used people for his own convenience'. Earlier, Haruhi also calls Kaoru out on it by telling him that he was 'kind but also selfish', and that he would rapidly find himself alone if he 'plays with people's feelings'.

Kyouya going too far is a dime a dozen – the sports festival itself demonstrates this. Tamaki may not be able to stop him from doing it, but Tamaki always brings it up and confronts him. Alternatively, Tamaki is able to take it when Kyouya's actions are directed towards him.

Honey was taking his frustration out on things when he was banned from sweets – Mori has to be the restraining influence. Like Tamaki, Mori can take it when Honey's actions are directed towards him.

Additionally, the three of them have personalities that have a triple layer contradiction format. Like perfume, amusingly enough, with top notes, heart notes, and base notes. The top notes are what people perceive them to be immediately upon meeting, the heart notes are what their core personalities are truly like, and the base notes are what they genuinely desire to be (therefore, in a way, also what they genuinely become). The base notes actually echo the top notes more often than not; this repetition is the 'contradiction' mentioned in the format.

The remarkable thing about the White Team is that their heart notes are all 'dark', whereas the Red Team's heart notes are all 'light', i.e. Kaoru's, Kyouya's and Honey's natures have sinister facets (assuming that the Red Team characters have that many layers, I suspect they have only 2 layers each, but this is an argument for another time).

**Kaoru**

Top notes: the 'uke' persona to his brother, one of two identical twins – softer, gentler, more sensitive, easier to bully, more likely to give in, friendlier, kinder.

Heart notes: actually he is the slyer, more cunning twin of the pair, uses information to his advantage, more likely to discover your weak points and know where to hit to destroy you, more likely to manipulate your feelings (here we should bear in mind that emotional harm is typically more scarring and takes longer to heal than physical harm), sneakier and more secretive, able to take on a persona that will get you to spill what he wants to know from you.

Base notes: in truth, Kaoru _does_ want to be – and is – the sweeter twin. He wants to be gentler to others because he_ is_ more sensitive; he wants to be all of that to the people he loves. He will give in to them, he likes seeing them happy, he will give them anything they want from him because it is what he is.

**Kyouya**

Top notes: charming in manner, hospitable, cordial, achieves excellence at everything, accommodates your every request, uncomplaining, generous, capable of great kindness and unselfishness, brilliant and knowledgeable.

Heart notes: evil, cold, calculating, merit-focused, highly indifferent to most things, often contemptuous towards lesser beings, unfeeling, uses insidious ploys and gambits without compunction, constantly pursuing political agendas, primarily seeks benefits for himself.

Base notes: he_ is_ very hospitable and accommodating to the club members, whom he loves. He does not often get angry at them, if at all (that's why when he gets properly pissed off in the sports festival arc, everyone is a bit apprehensive), he lets them do whatever they want and he cleans up the mess they leave behind; he does want to have friends, and he cherishes them and is loyal to them; if his actions do not directly benefit them, at least he does not harm them.

Further analyses of Kyouya: one very critical point about Kyouya is that, like Mori, he is _okay with being alone_. Not 'alone' as in friendless, but 'alone' as in they can sit in silence and be very comfortable with themselves and others. It is only an intolerably _boring_ stereotype that characters such as these must be very lonely inside. If someone just spouts some supposedly deep words like "you feel lonely, don't you" to them, characters such as Kyouya and Mori aren't going to be in awe! Firstly that's not really what they're feeling, and secondly they don't care to be psychoanalysed. Kyouya would likely scoff in the person's face, smirking that smirk that he gets when someone has a fail moment, and Mori would have the '?' response.

That is because people who like other people for being lonely – that isn't love at all. It's not even proper liking. It is _narcissism_, because the lonely person makes them feel needed and wanted. They think that they can fill a gap in the lonely person's life, which in turn gives themselves value. Basically, then, what they like about the lonely person is the fact that the lonely person adds to their low self-value. It is a complex that they are able to see through, melt and therefore 'own' these characters.

Tamaki _is_ a narcissist. This is by the mangaka's own admission. A study of his actions shows that he does like to bug people who he thinks need assistance – make no mistake about it, _it is the self-love_ thing, albeit a foolish version. Remember what I said about Mori and Kyouya types? They aren't moved by these people. Remember also that at the start Kyouya did emotionally reject Tamaki even as he continued to entertain the Suou heir's whims.

This is the difference: Tamaki didn't employ the "you're lonely, aren't you" tactic. He employed the (extremely sincere) "I think you are interesting, let's be friends and do things together! Let's have fun!" approach. Then, he puts in a lot of effort and he doesn't give them the opportunity to reject him. Tamaki is not showing them pity, which is condescending. He is genuinely fascinated by them, he blows them away with his exuberance and he forcibly makes them take part; his goal is to get people involved, regardless of how terribly they treat him or whether they insult him or think poorly of him.

I am aware that I'm twisting canon a little bit with the content in the last chapter and this – however, I really do think that Honey and Mori have a better grasp of Kyouya as a person. That is, I am claiming that H&M understand Kyouya better than Tamaki does (blasphemy, I know). This is because they not only understand him, they understand Kyouya-and-Tamaki, and they understand Kyouya's position in the club relative to everyone. If we start from this premise, the only consistent explanation left is that Tamaki is closer to Kyouya because Tamaki knows how to reach him (seniority issues aside). The seniors win at knowledge, Tamaki wins at effort. It's just, when I think about it for too long and too hard, it's unbelievably stupid of Kyouya to be impressed with Tamaki because that person "sees through him"; more than once in the manga and anime we see plenty of other characters who see through Kyouya, too – Haruhi, for one, Kuze and his fiancée Mitsuyama also can to a certain extent yet he's not falling over himself to be their friend.

Hence: Kyouya's isolation was brought about because he didn't find anyone of his match. He enjoyed the fact that no one was his match more than being alone. So being able to find someone who could match him (annoy him to no end) is something that he would hold onto till the end. In that sense Tamaki is very precious to him, like a worthy rival/friend (keeping in mind that enemies of an equal standing tend to understand each other more than allies of different stations would). Kyouya finally found someone who wouldn't go away. Previously, people would just go away when he in effect tells them how inferior they are to him, and their going away is affirmation of Kyouya's thoughts. Kyouya has no desire to hang out with such people – he liked his superiority more than the loneliness, actually.

**Honey**

Top notes: cake-loving, sweet, smiley, harmless, going about his own life, cheerful and solicitous, easily underestimated, easily contented (just present him with cakes).

Heart notes: diabolical, dangerous, powerful, highly astute and usually understands everything that is going on, likes doing things his way, provocative, aware of his own superiority and unafraid to use it.

Base notes: still pleasant personality, sweet to Yasuchika and Kaoru and all those whom he prizes, wishes the best for them and their future, cheerful and content in life, and doesn't usually care to cause harm to anyone even if he derives joy from watching them wet themselves when he threatens them, wants to be happy and go about his merry way unhindered by anything.

Further analyses of Honey: I'd like to discuss 2 aspects.

(1) As alluded to in the last part of the chapter, my portrayal of Honey is based on another character from popular culture. Did you try to guess? The answer is the Joker, from The Dark Knight (Batman); the clues were the words 'anti-planner', 'agent of danger' ('chaos' for the Joker), and the best one of all, 'do I really look like a person with a plan?'

Honey (like Mori) is a difficult character to grasp, but once you get them, everything makes sense. At the start, I didn't understand Honey and his host type is not exactly my type, which contributed to a sense of detachment about him. That was until I began to delve into the character and pay close attention to certain sides of him that are sporadically revealed to us – and that was it, I was _sold_.

Essentially, Honey is the sort of person who has seen through life and is able to joke about it. He tends to get what he wants to say across in a bright manner, but when people don't listen or are in need of a more serious attitude, he turns into the Joker. Honey has a wonderfully effective killing aura and he knows it, knows the effect he can have on people (see for example Chapter 47, page 4). He wields it expertly and sparingly, enhancing its impact with each use.

Through scrutiny, I have discovered and realised that Honey likes reactions – he likes causing and getting reactions, and that's all he's really looking for. Sometimes he has an idea of how people are like, and he tests them to see if his theories are true. That is what the Joker does in The Dark Knight movie – the Joker did the things he did to see whether or not humanity is as he thought and Honey is sort of like that because he enjoys seeing how people respond. Another similarity is that Honey has such vastly different priorities than the average human – actually in Chapter 5B, he really did want Tamaki's power solely to convince Chika that it's okay to like cute things. This makes Honey alienish and gives him an incredible depth, a strangely irresistible allure. It is only people like the Joker, like Honey, who don't want what other normal people want, who think everything is good sport, that they can play outside of the rules and see everything with crystal clarity.

The label applied to this AB personality type is Honey/Joker. If you think it sounds deadly and that it's real bad news, you are _damn right_. Keep mulling on how scary that combination is, how much sheer effortless brilliance is contained in it… now do you like it? ;)

(2) Honey honestly loves going along with the others on their craziness because he's a _troll_. This is related to his love of doing or saying things to provoke a response, or sometimes, _just to say or do something for the heck of it_. He actually really actively enjoys being so silly with the rest; like Mori and Kyouya, he doesn't actually need the social company, unlike the twins who crave the company but pushed it away because they wanted it too much. Observe Honey's trollface in the commoner fair episode of the anime, where he goes all, "Kyou-chan is really scary when he's just woken up~" and Mori flatly tells him that he's in no position to say that, to which Honey replies with an absolutely faux-ignorant/innocent "Ehhh?" like he doesn't know what the hell Mori's talking about.

In the manga, also the commoner fair (Chapter 28), when Kyouya ties all the club members up in revenge, look at Honey's carefree joy even as he is trussed up like the rest. The guy knows he's powerful – this is simply undeniable. That knowledge of his easy superiority lets him troll other people with abandon, since he knows he can get out of basically any situation unscathed. He doesn't fear Kyouya _at all_, if anything Kyouya should be the one fearing him – I have acknowledged this when I got Kaoru to say that both he (Kaoru) and Kyouya took a long time to warm to Honey, because they could instinctively sense that he was dangerous.

Throughout the manga, Honey has a propensity to say fairly outrageous and absurd things to the rest – towards Tamaki, he'd ask questions such as "are you a stalker, Tama-chan?" in an innocuous tone, and the fact that he pretends to be a helpless child (being unable to find his slipper, etc.) most of the time should ring warning bells about his acting chops and his delight in baiting others.

The people that Honey loves to troll the most are Tamaki and Mori. Often it flies over Tamaki's head. Mori is used to it. Examples of him trolling Mori are in Chapter 71, page 30, where he knew what Mori wanted to say to him but didn't want to make it easy for him, and another one of my favourites is when he uses that candy-coated acid tone, like in Chapter 72, page 7 where he is talking to Mori about the martial arts challenge that they will fight on the grassy hills. Honey says, "Now that it has become this way, I can't take it lightly anymore, are you ok with this? You might not be able to attend both the graduation ceremony and the party after that." In the small side words, he tacks on, "You need to prebook a hospital?"

I _adore_ it. In that one exchange, Honey is unmasked because he is alone with Takashi, who is not only an equally magnificent judge of character (the one other person on par with him) but who knows him better than any other living soul. Several things can be extrapolated: Honey's absolute confidence in himself, his easy dominance over other people, his ability to threaten and menace others, his skill at blending seriousness into jokes – in that moment he is cool and lordly, someone who is at the apex, the top of the hierarchy, and he _bloody well knows it_.

Honey's blossoms are meant to complete the image. The twinkling dancing flowers are so expressive and trollish, I can't stand it. I do think that the just-woken-up Honey is the real him – it is Honey before he has a chance to consciously tone himself down to make it through the day without wreaking destruction and havoc everywhere he goes. But that is _a lot_ of raw power contained in a very small being day-in, day-out, day-after-day – hence I thought he would need an outlet (probably more than one) into which to channel these energies, and that activity must be something high octane, requiring massive concentration, skill and born talent to appease his darker side long enough for Honey to function as a relatively harmless human being. Kaoru's in-fic observations of him follow from this; and Honey naturally is shrewd enough to conceal this part of himself, that is why he has barely permitted anyone to join him on the racetrack, much less in the same car.

Silly Kaoru doesn't actually know the staggering significance of what Honey has given him, but it's okay. Honey knows, and now you know. :D

**Conclusions**

The manga was wrapped up in the Tamaki/Haruhi story – the main storyline of the canon work, so it can't be helped – and while it was a satisfying read, there are many areas left unexplored. Now that you have a clear picture of where I'm coming from, I can only hope that in this homage to the world of OSHSC, I can capture a portion of those unseen, unknown snapshots and with any luck, bring you along for an exciting journey that will display these characters in a new light that sparks a passion within you, the same passion that my version of Kaoru feels for the endless possibilities of pure imagination.

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* * *

><p>.<p>

_Continued in Part D._


	13. Retrospective: Mitsukuni

**RETROSPECTIVE: MITSUKUNI**

**Senpai Power**

.

_(sometime during the past year)_

Mitsukuni is having tea and cakes with two people.

At this table is enough power to conquer the world. This is not a figure of speech.

Consider this: biological warfare.

Two words to bring nations to their knees. To implant a contagious virus, or to incite to war – child's play to Mitsukuni. Generals salute him, access to international war chambers is granted to him, armed men and women worldwide have been trained by him and his family and are accustomed to taking his orders. In a situation of anarchy caused by mass panic from a pandemic plague, the promise of salvation is the oasis in the parched desert, at which point Kyou-chan can announce the triumph of a cure to the very strain of disease that they'd developed and long ago vaccinated themselves against. The alternating despair and hope will break most people's spirits – there will not even be a need to take power, no, because the people will beg the inventors of the cure to rule them.

Hence, it is a good thing that Mitsukuni cares only for his family, friends, Usa-chan, and sweets.

Life for him is about containing his power, not about gaining power. For this reason, he is not normal. At six years of age, Mitsukuni's favourite book was The Art of War – essential reading for all Haninozukas, Morinozukas and their disciples, though typically not at such an early age and ordinarily with less understanding and genuine appreciation. By seven, his aptitude in igo and chess had surpassed all of the martial arts students whether adult or adolescent, and by eight he'd defeated both his father and his mother for the first time. The one person who continued to rout him was his grandmother, the reigning master of igo in their family, and even till her death Mitsukuni had not achieved a win over her; she had not deigned to gift him a cheap victory.

Although all of Mitsukuni's closest friends play these games, he knows that the only worthy opponents are Takashi and Kyou-chan. Tama-chan, with his fascination for all things Japanese, had learnt the rules of go in France… and had been utterly vanquished at Kyou-chan's hands to the unending amusement of Hika-chan and Kao-chan. Tama-chan then challenged Kyou-chan to western-style chess and met with the same fate.

If Mitsukuni and Kyou-chan have been making progress at comparable speeds, Mitsukuni should still emerge the winner of a match between them; as it does not benefit him to confirm this theory, he does not ask for a game. Kyou-chan is prickly as a porcupine when his space is invaded and it is people who don't mind being punctured by his needle quills that charge forward stupidly.

Takashi _could_ connect with Kyou-chan were it not for his presence, Mitsukuni thinks, but as Takashi is so inextricably linked with him, they're all stuck in defined subsets within the group. There is a crucial difference between Mitsukuni's relationship with Takashi and Kyou-chan's relationship with Tama-chan – if Mitsukuni hadn't already known it, he would certainly have known after watching Kyou-chan play against Tama-chan – and that is: _knowledge_.

To everyone, it must seem like Mitsukuni is the ascendant in his relationship with Takashi. Yet the plainest truths are often hidden in equally plain sight: Takashi is stoic, non-talkative in the extreme, verbally stunted on occasion and inclined to unhealthy patterns of thought in which he thinks of himself in a particular way and subsequently disappoints himself when he doesn't fit the parameters he drew for himself.

Mitsukuni can look at all of Takashi's blank facial expressions and read different meanings in the _same_ blankness – fatigue, indifference, contemplation, vigilance – instead of the abstruse standoffishness and intimidating unapproachability that many other people see in Takashi. Mitsukuni is Takashi's voice – he frees Takashi from the need to talk because Takashi actually really doesn't care for talking. More importantly, Takashi almost never has to ask for what he wants or needs because Mitsukuni always arranges it for him. Takashi has frequent moments of breakdowns in communicative ability; he understands a lot cerebrally but he stumbles at conveying it in words. In terms of articulacy Mitsukuni is definitely the stronger, therefore he speaks as the representative of the both of them.

In other words, Mitsukuni _spoils _him. Just as he indulges Mitsukuni.

They make the best team because they rival each other in perceptiveness while differing in favoured roles. In social interactions, they grasp the dynamics of a situation with precision and speed. In business they are lethal, and that is itself a valid reason for them to behave inconspicuously. Because Takashi is silent, he is wise – his opportunities to observe are infinite, and observe he does.

Working in tandem, when with their business associates, Mitsukuni acts as the equivalent of – well, the Speaker in a British house of parliament, really: he appears to be a participant but he is in actuality presiding over the conversation, rotating the contributions of each person present and subtly inviting them to express their opinions on issues while managing to remain non-partisan and revealing virtually nothing of himself. Mitsukuni relies on Takashi to catalogue the sessions – not even he can constantly listen and talk simultaneously, and his mind has to be on the next question and next target while someone else is currently speaking – thus, Takashi does sometimes have the edge on observational skill, though Takashi only needs to prompt for Mitsukuni to harmonise with him instantly, like when Takashi thinks that an associate is untrustworthy without possessing the necessary oratory capability to explain it, Mitsukuni is the one to give coherent form to his mental deductions.

Mitsukuni knows that Takashi will play him to a draw, in chess and in life.

As it stands, this is not the case for Kyou-chan and Tama-chan, or Kao-chan and Hika-chan.

Mitsukuni and Takashi are positional players; Kyou-chan is an anticipatory player; Kao-chan is an undeveloped player – Mitsukuni and Takashi are grounded in the present, they do not lose sight of the big picture and the mutable web of relations; Kyou-chan looks ahead to the future to create his gameplan for the here and now; Kao-chan is languishing passively, letting the crisis approach when it will, whenever the club members start competing as men for a woman's love.

From Tama-chan's unforced errors, Kyou-chan could have mated in eight moves but he chose to drag it out to twenty – Tama-chan had been so pleased at being able to play with Kyou-chan, and _knowing that_, Kyou-chan had prolonged the game to prolong his joy. This is what Kyou-chan and Kao-chan don't quite understand: knowledge can be a _weakness_.

A willing, heartfelt weakness, but a weakness nonetheless.

Where the affection between the parties is the same, the person who sees more is the person who gives more – because that person is _better_ at giving more. In the years of their friendship, Kyou-chan and Kao-chan have consistently proved themselves to be the ones who give the best presents for birthdays and Christmases. Their gifts are thoughtful and suitable, specifically catered to the individual recipient. At the best of times, one gift from either of them is worth a million gifts from others.

Tama-chan does things that _he_ thinks will make people happy – as emotions stem from the common basis of humanity, Tama-chan is able to score a hit even when he has no idea whatsoever where the bull's eye is. He succeeds simply because he fires _so many shots_ without any sense of economy with his stash of bullets. This is also the reason that he had persistently failed to impress Haru-chan for such a long time; already Haru-chan is out of their sphere of experience, and for Tama-chan, a person for whom the word 'rationality' does not exist in the dictionary, Haru-chan may as well have been a member of another species. Tama-chan does not proceed from a careful analysis of people, Kyou-chan does; Tama-chan takes action, which is arguably better than no action – it is only by action that the world changes, not by unexpressed thought.

Yet, in the long run, the imbalance will become more pronounced and the ones who will take the brunt of it are Kyou-chan and Kao-chan. Some impediment to the progress of each of these juniors is inevitable.

After all, Mitsukuni and Takashi were the same terrible liability to each other in the days before the club, before they became seniors to a group of wayward juniors. Takashi was – is – Mitsukuni's rock and anchor; by virtue of that, he weighs Mitsukuni down and holds Mitsukuni back from exploring the unlimited horizon. Vice versa, of course.

Ironic, isn't it.

An anchor works precisely because it digs in and blocks a ship from drifting out and getting lost – its strength is its weakness and its weakness is its strength, blended indistinguishably into a singular utility. This invariably leads Mitsukuni to think about what will happen when he and Takashi head off to university – they've got themselves sorted, their applications will proceed without a glitch, that is the extent of their confidence in tackling the stages of growing up. These kouhais, though… three stuck in obliviousness, two stuck in inertia… it's one thing to have all the time in the world during club, another thing for that mentality to cross over into other aspects of life.

But Mitsukuni is no saviour.

Mitsukuni is: a boy who loves sweets and toys, with hobbies where a single mistake can be fatal and every move counts. He is educated in the combative arts and sleeps with a stuffed rabbit at night. He likes going along with stupid things that are pointless and fun, racing at breakneak speeds, and is a sniper of the highest calibre. His mathematical accuracy, range estimation and fieldcraft are the stuff of legend, his small size facilitating his concealment and camouflage.

His athleticism aside, he is eighteen years old and still can't reach the top shelf without jumping.

He honestly enjoys the finesse of battle, and that is what makes his restraint extraordinary. He has been to war-torn areas and seen with his own eyes the devastation and anguish of ordinary people – he wants to keep that sickening knowledge in him, he wants to have civilian friends like Kao-chan and commoner friends like Haru-chan to remember the feeling of defenselessness even though it does not apply to him.

Mitsukuni was a child who, when he was 14 or thereabouts, overheard his father say to his mother that he was born centuries too late for the glory of old, a power that will forever be leashed by the conventions of modernity.

What is a boy like that to do in this era?

… Have tea and cakes, of course.

Not many people know about their meetings – they are unplanned and spontaneous. Those who know are often too preoccupied to notice that the three of them aren't together simply because they don't feel like joining in with the activity of the day, or they lack the cognitive ability to deduce that they aren't simply sitting and eating.

Takashi is nursing a cup of gyokuro with all due consideration that should be afforded to a tea so fine and distinctive; occasionally he responds to Mitsukuni's stream of conversation about everything and nothing. Kyou-chan is drinking his espresso in silence, revising for the upcoming Physics final by doing practice papers that are two years above the required level. He has made a mistake in his calculations on question 11(b) – something that Mitsukuni will point out to him if and only if he does not realise it himself by the time they split up to return to their respective homes.

Generating topics of conversation that have no real substance is an acquired skill. While eating his 8 layer vanilla cake, Mitsukuni has discussed – amongst others – the layers of his cake (of course): vanilla crème chantilly, toasted vanilla brûlée, vanilla water gel, vanilla ganache, vanilla macaron, vanilla dacquoise, vanilla chiffon cake and vanilla almond crunch, as well as the ability of iPhones to resist water, the annoyingness of loose icing sugar dusted on mille-feuilles, the potential that Kao-chan has to become an expert pâtissier or perfumer, and whether Tama-chan should make a habit of wearing less lurid underwear if he knows that he falls down so often, to which Kyou-chan had held his breath to hold in his laughter.

Hika-chan hurtles by with Tama-chan in hot pursuit.

The three of them raise their heads to show that they are paying attention to the other club members, as though their own matters are nothing so important as to be wholly absorbed in.

Tama-chan appeals to Kyou-chan for help in garbled sentences; the picture of aloofness, Kyou-chan turns back to his exam preparation. In the distance, Hika-chan has captured Haru-chan and is taunting Tama-chan mercilessly – the whirlwind of noise blows out as quickly as it'd blown in.

_Poor Kyou-chan_ – "Ne, Takashi, has Chika been studying hard – " – _you're in an awful position, aren't you _– " – at your house lately, or is he playing with Satoshi-kun? " – _do you really get it or do you not know?_

"Satoshi makes sure they study," Takashi guarantees.

_This is not a world_ – "Oh, good! Last trimester, Chika's history results were – " – _in which wishes always come true –_ " – a bit lower than his usual average, and – "_ –_ _This is not a world –_ "Chika said that the exam was difficult but – " _– in which all hearts can be moved –_ " – if he'd studied properly, maybe he would have – "_ – This is not a world –_ " – known the answers." _where pure-hearted fools can climb to the top._

"Satoshi said the highest result was two marks above Yasuchika's."

"Ehhh?" Mitsukuni says in the voice of a person who had not known that. "Is the standard of their class so low? Is it the teacher?"

Takashi takes his _meaning_. "I will supervise them."

Like the recipient of a surprise windfall, Mitsukuni beams and starts in on another slice of cake with accompanying running commentary on its composite elements.

Halfway through, Mitsukuni randomly says, "Kyou-chan is so mean! He doesn't listen to me!"

Kyou-chan takes on his patented closed-eyed smile and as usual replies with something completely inane, "I am. I didn't realise that Honey-senpai was looking for my response."

"Of course I am, silly Kyou-chan." Mitsukuni shakes his head as his blossoms form a halo. "How else can I ask Kyou-chan – "

– _what you will do if ever a day comes where your wish clashes directly with Tama-chan's wish?_

" – if you want a slice of cake? This cake is primarily coffee and walnut, does Kyou-chan want some? It's not too sweet."

"If you say so, Honey-senpai," Kyou-chan accepts obligingly.

_I do say so. In the _real_ world, in the grand scheme of things outside the fantastic daydream of our school, is it possible for the current you to keep both yourself and your friends afloat? That crown that you did not seize for yourself, does it chafe? Or are you telling yourself that the day will come?_

"The walnut nougatine is wonderful! But maybe Kyou-chan – "

– _could take heed: watch your actions, for they become habits; watch your habits, for they become character; watch your character, for it becomes your destiny._

" – won't want so much of the apple raisin compote, so Kyou-chan can scoop some of it out and leave it to the side."

"I'll do that, thank you, Honey-senpai."

"Mitsukuni." Takashi refills his teacup for him.

There should have been no need to attract his attention for a task as that. A warning, then, to stop pushing.

"Takashi, don't you think the tea needs something more?" Mitsukuni asks meditatively.

Takashi looks at him evenly.

"Does it?" Kyou-chan murmurs absently, crossing out his answer to 11(b) and redoing the sums.

"Yes," Mitsukuni quips blithely. _Si vis pacem, para bellum, Kyou-chan._ "It's one-dimensional. It has depth but it lacks breadth."

"Mitsukuni." Takashi serves him another cup – tea from another teapot.

"Takashi, here." Mitsukuni shoves a plate of cake at him.

"Does the tea need breadth if it has such depth as you say, Honey-senpai?"

"It depends. Does the tea wish to be first flush? Whole leaf? Super fine and tippy? Or will it go to waste in a teabag despite having these natural qualities?"

Kyou-chan puts down his pen and ruler to smile fully at Mitsukuni. "If Honey-senpai is willing to educate me about tea, I am all ears."

Mitsukuni giggles. "Hee. Kyou-chan already knows about tea. Kyou-chan just isn't drinking the best he can have."

"Perhaps Honey-senpai will help me to buy the right tea?"

Mitsukuni stares into him piercingly. "Is Kyou-chan asking for my help?"

_I know you're wary of me and you prefer Takashi._

Clever Kyou-chan is carefully reviewing his decision again, if for nothing else than to demonstrate that it is an informed choice. "Yes, I am. As Mori-senpai is the tea connoisseur of our club, without a doubt Mori-senpai is the person most suitable to front our tea assignment, don't you agree, Honey-senpai?"

"Takashi is the most qualified," Mitsukuni concedes graciously. "If Takashi is amenable to helping Kyou-chan improve his tea knowledge, why not? Are you, Takashi?"

Takashi gives him a very stern look before he scrutinises Kyou-chan.

After a minute, he nods once firmly.

Kyou-chan smiles with a shadow of a secret and takes a forkful of cake.

A shock of red hair sticks itself through a gap in the door. Kao-chan glances around the room furtively and deftly makes his way over to them when he is satisfied that the coast is clear.

"Honey-senpai!" Kao-chan perches on one edge of Mitsukuni's chair.

Mitsukuni grins at him and offers some cake.

Kao-chan allows himself to be fed as he scans the table. "Oh? Are there no more jam cookies?"

"Takashi ate them all," Mitsukuni says promptly, and Takashi's jaw drops in shock.

There is a loud clatter and the rest of the club tumble in.

"There you are, you devil!" Tama-chan howls at Kao-chan, who springs up immediately to rescue Hika-chan for a counterattack.

Haru-chan sighs, looking incredibly beleaguered. "Why couldn't I have studied quietly like Kyouya-senpai?"

"Yes," Kyou-chan says smoothly, "we wouldn't want Haruhi to be in danger of losing her scholarship now, would we?"

Tama-chan shrieks; Hika-chan and Kao-chan turn bleach white.

Haru-chan is compelled to study, tutored by Tama-chan who is frankly doing more harm than good.

Mitsukuni notes that Kao-chan's eyes flicker to Haru-chan every now and then, and wonders if he should say something to Kao-chan. He's not the type of senior who has a compulsion to butt in on his juniors' problems and strong-arm them towards a solution that they are blind to… there are times, however, when he might have said something if not for the fact that whichever junior in question will never forgive him if he did.

For saying the _truth_, not for lying – there's another irony.

_Haru-chan is not good for you as a partner, Kao-chan._ "Kao-chan, open up!" Mitsukuni shares his raspberry chocolate ganache tart. "Aren't the berries fresh?"

_For someone as Kao-chan, who tends to lose out in relationships, it is not good for you to have an oblivious partner or you'll struggle alone all the time. At the bare minimum, your partner must continually match you in perceptiveness._

Kao-chan smiles sweetly, putting the cakes to shame. "Their tartness cuts into the richness of the chocolate amazingly; Honey-senpai has such flawless taste in cakes."

"How come only Kaoru gets cake?" Hika-chan demands with exaggerated petulance. "Honey-senpai, are you so easily taken in by Kaoru's flattery?"

"Yes, yes, Hika-chan gets some too!" _Haru-chan could be good for you, Hika-chan, but you're going about it the wrong way and I think by the time you realise it will be too late._

"Mitsukuni." Takashi tops up his cup again.

Mitsukuni turns to his cousin, ostensibly to smile in gratitude but in reality to extract Takashi's thoughts.

Kyou-chan tries to catch a glimpse of them discreetly.

_Yes, I suppose that makes sense. We'll let things flow their course and be around to pick up the pieces?_

_But you think it's okay to say something to Kao-chan?_

_I think so too, Takashi. Kyou-chan will be more comfortable if you work with him without reference to me – it might help to tell him that._

_Kao-chan. Definitely Kao-chan._

_Okay? Okay then. Do your best, Takashi._

"Ne, ne, everyone! Yesterday, Takashi's piyo-chan – "

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) This would have taken place after the school festival (Chapters 24-25) but before the love quadrilateral (Chapters 44-45).

(b) The vanilla cake that Mitsukuni is having is the V8 cake by Adriano Zumbo. Yes, it's crazy and delicious and amazing, the tempered white chocolate flower is beautiful and the sugar sphere water droplets are delicate and *rambles rambles rambles* and it actually exists, you can google for a photograph of it. There's a V8 Diesel too – an 8-ingredient chocolate cake. Yum. All of the cakes I describe actually exist, in fact – that was the point of writing The Cake Shop AU, to indulge my Honey-esque cake love shamelessly. V8 cake, V8 cake, how much do I love you, let me count the ways!

(c) I've always been curious about this: do you people actually like me to leave detailed notes? Or would you prefer googling for things yourselves? For example, 'si vis pacem, para bellum' means 'if you wish for peace, prepare for war' – stuff like this, would you prefer I set them all out for you so you can be lazy (that is, if such knowledge happened to not already be in your mind's inventory), or are you uninterested and/or think it's condescending? :-/


	14. Chapter 5D

**CHAPTER FIVE(D)**

**White Team Fight!**

.

**D.**

This is Kaoru, Mitsukuni, Kyouya.

The White Team.

Observant, calculating, patient, manipulative.

Masters of psychological tactics.

Contradictions in terms.

"Hello, Kaoru-san," Hacker-san's voice greets him amidst the crunch of ajitsuke-nori, eyes glued to the huge ass screen.

Kaoru pauses at the entrance of her apartment on this fine Wednesday after school, and _stares_.

An unknown contraption that resembles a short, tiny table with arms rolls by insouciantly.

He is silent for so long that she turns to investigate.

"Ah, you can sit there, Kaoru-san." She points to a plush armchair raised on a dais. "From there you will be able to see everything in the room. Sorry, it's still messy; please watch your step."

He makes an odd, choking sound that's somewhere between incredulity and horrified amusement.

About a week ago, he'd installed Hacker-san in this apartment along with two cheques: one for her salary for the first three months in advance for her to get herself settled in, as well as another to fix a budget for her to build their base of operations. At first she had been suspicious about it and tried to look for the catch, then as she began to construct her paradise in her head she became more and more rapturous about it, to the point where a silly cloud-nine grin is perpetually stuck on her face.

Their headquarters is also Hacker-san's new living space – during her employment with Kaoru's father, she had provided her real address and owing to her corporate theft, that flat had been seized to 'repay' the company. The top floor of the apartment is hers and the bottom floor is theirs.

This is the result: a wide expanse without dividing walls, save for the walls of the bathroom. Thick, western-style carpeting rather than tatami mats. Ample adjustable lighting to reduce eye strain. Three flat-screen high-definition plasma TVs mounted side-by-side with a good distance apart, each attached to a game console (PS3, Xbox 360 and Nintendo Wii) with a complete surround sound home theatre. A projector hanging from the ceiling. There is a mini studio that is obviously meant for him – a large worktable, empty bookshelves and a computer with 2 monitor screens and a customised CPU with no casing, revealing its glorious intricate innards. This studio is bordered by the dais – Kaoru lowers himself into the armchair and is promptly eaten up by the marshmallow-soft upholstery, yet it is curiously firm enough to support the spine.

Somewhat dazed, Kaoru studies the pièce de résistance situated beside his open-concept studio: a nine-screen behemoth that boggles his mind just to be in its shadow.

"Hot chocolate, Kaoru-san?" Hacker-san offers generously. The table with arms whizzes to him and holds out a mug.

Kaoru takes the commoners' beverage and sips it, still speechless.

Very enthusiastically, she says, "Doesn't it look awesome now? I made the workers do overtime to get most of it done so quickly! Do you think a snack bar will be useful? Work always makes me hungry – actually I wonder if we can get some daybeds too, Kaoru-san! We can put them against the – "

"Hacker-san," Kaoru interrupts, "where are the invoices?"

She fetches them, a clump of papers on the worktable. He peruses them, pleased to find that she keeps good records and that even though he had chosen not to expressly warn her against it just to give her some leeway, she'd had the integrity to use her own salary for her luxuries and her home.

"This is all?" Kaoru questions, only to find that she has vanished from his side to return to her PS3 game.

"Mmh," she mumbles distractedly as she picks the lock of a treasure chest to obtain a rune.

Uncertainly, Kaoru navigates around the various boxes scattered all over, peering into them to check out their contents – an obscene amount of gadgetry and hardware, sci-fi and fantasy books and movies, a shockingly large collection of graphic novels and manga, and an entire library of games.

With a droning hum, the table machine puts his mug on a stand with a tealight contained within in order to keep the beverage warm. Gingerly, Kaoru nudges the device with his toe.

"What is this thing?"

Hacker-san briefly glances at him. "It's my PAIS-LE bot."

"Paisley?"

"Personalised Artificial Intelligence Service dash Learned Efficiency. I designed the software for it as a pet project while I was working for Kaoru-san's father, but unfortunately poor PAIS-LE kind of sucks because I don't have the expert engineering skills to integrate my software into a proper mechanical household aide. I'm still tinkering with it."

"In other words, it does your chores for you? And I thought you couldn't get more sedentary, Hacker-san."

"Necessity is the mother of invention, Kaoru-san. The visual and voice recognition software I was creating for Kaoru-san's father was so good, I _had _to trial it in other fields. Version 1 of PAIS bots was rejected by that company anyway – they said it was an irrelevant invention. Kaoru-san can try ordering it to do something – it recognises your voice."

Kaoru bends over to poke at PAIS-LE. "What's Version 1? PAIS-LE, bring me my hot chocolate!"

"Dubbed 'Obtained Efficiency' post-mortem. That was a mistake because all the knowledge and commands had to be directly programmed into the bot, hence, 'obtained' from humans and it was very inflexible. 'Learned efficiency' operates more like children growing up – it tracks the instructions it is given and builds its database of knowledge from that, which means that it becomes more efficient with each repetition of the same task. For example, the first time Kaoru-san asks it to make tea, you have to stand beside it and guide it step-by-step – that is the equivalent of inputting your instructions. The next time, it will recall the information from its database when it hears Kaoru-san's voice, therefore Kaoru-san and I can issue the same set of instructions, "Make tea!" but it will make two different types of tea according to how we like it."

PAIS-LE retrieves the mug, scans the room for his location and zooms to him. Kaoru laughs in delight. "How is this irrelevant?! If I have my own PAIS-LE unit, I can teach it to assist me in the atelier!"

"To be frank, the prototypal PAIS model was awful," admits Hacker-san. "But who's a good bot now, who's a good bot?"

Kaoru watches as she coos over her mechanical pet. "Your seclusion is making you nutty as fruitcake, isn't it, Hacker-san? Wait, you were like that from the start. Please don't labour under any assumptions that I am imprisoning you here – I _encourage_ you to go out once in a while."

"You said, 'be on call 24/7' but what do you expect me to do when you don't have tasks for me? I'm a programmer, I live to create programs! Ars longa, vita brevis, Kaoru-san."

"Experimentum periculosum, Hacker-san," he ripostes.

She actually laughs, a creaky, cawing noise. "Excellent, Kaoru-san! Not to worry, I've resisted dismantling the hardware I bought with your money. In this house, that includes the TVs and some of the furniture – we agreed on that cutting-edge computer together, remember? The consoles and your computer are mine, so they're fair game."

Sure enough, when Kaoru examines 'his' computer closely, he notes that the keys on the keyboard have the sheen of prolonged use, though it appears remarkably well-cared for. Hacker-san drops her controller and joins him, switching the computer on.

"It's not new but it's really fast and the image resolution is very high," Hacker-san says hesitantly, loading the movie trailer of Inception to substantiate her claims. "If you don't mind using it, I can help you to fix up your graphics tablet. You use Wacom, right? Intuos or Cintiq?"

The resolution is, in fact, professional-grade and better than the one he has in the atelier at home, though he doesn't tell her that.

"I don't mind." He smiles. "I have both."

She snorts, like she should have guessed.

"You managed to do all of the renovations and get all of these on the existing budget?"

Instantly upset, she glares at him. "Are you implying that I got them using the proceeds of shady activities?!"

"What? No!"

"You know I'm poor! Where else would the money come from if not you?!"

"Hacker-san, it was an innocent question, honestly," Kaoru says, attempting to pacify her. "I'm just amazed at how you've stretched the budget. Is this a commoner's innate skill?"

"Well, the snack bar and the daybeds would have broken the budget, that's why I haven't ordered them," she explains sullenly. "Like I said, quite a lot of the stuff here was already mine, and the worktable and bookshelves are actually yours, or don't you recognise them?"

"What?!" Kaoru snaps his head to the mentioned objects.

"They're from your – "

"I know where they're from! The question is how you stole them from the fourth study!"

"Huh? All calls made to this place are automatically recorded," she notifies him belatedly, gesturing to the phone on the floor and the whirring machine beside it. "I thought obocchamas like to use their own things, so I cut up pieces of your dialogue and pasted them together to order your servants to send some of your furniture to this address."

When he doesn't reply, she adds helpfully, "They delivered them while you were at your friend's house."

Kaoru takes a deep, calming breath. "Don't do anything like this again without informing me."

"It was meant to be a surprise!"

"Oh, I am surprised," Kaoru mutters.

"You said '_our_ headquarters'! I thought you'd like to have your own territory!"

He blinks at her.

Her fists are clenched in frustration, spots of colour dotting the apples of her cheeks. She's more cantankerous than usual today, and that's really saying something.

_Right, of course._ Kaoru resists the urge to smack his forehead. _I'm an idiot._

She'd made a space for him, let him have her computer – probably her most precious thing –

"_You're welcome_, Hacker-san." He'd tried to restrain himself from sounding too compassionate, too understanding, but even to his ears he has not succeeded.

"Yeah, um, well." She looks away in embarrassment.

"Are we all set?" he continues, pretending not to notice.

She nods, starting to bubble with euphoria. "I _love_ this place, Kaoru-san! Living in the heart of Akiba is my _dream_! And the house is _massive_! _Enormous!_ I've never _seen_ a house this big before, much less _lived _in one!"

Kaoru has to laugh. "Actually, I worried the house might have been a bit small."

"Small?! _Small?!_" she shrieks, nearly biting his head off. "A two-storey apartment in Akihabara?! All to myself without needing to pay rent?!"

"It's not a big deal," Kaoru says offhandedly. "My grandmother randomly bought it one day as an investment, and we hardly use it."

She goggles at him, lower jaw almost detaching from her face.

"I want to see how much work still needs to be done," Kaoru requests, heading up the stairs to view the rest of the house. "Otherwise, great job, Hacker-san. Did you leave some money for yourself to _eat_? Or did you go on a spree and spent it all on your technology fetish?"

"Spent it all," she answers, trudging along behind him. "Who needs to eat when you have Demon's Souls and Guild Wars?"

"That's why you're a walking skeleton, Kanon-san," Kaoru sasses, and she freezes.

"You!" she accuses furiously when she recovers. "You stalker! You don't trust me at all! I can't believe you hunted me to such a degree that you have to get my father involved!"

"What?!" Kaoru whirls around. "It was a complete coincidence! I wasn't stalking you! I was visiting with a friend! And you're one to talk about trust, Sadamoto Akemi of the fake identities and the false information!"

She gasps. "_I_ trust _you_! How was I supposed to react when you were sitting beside my father like nothing could possibly be wrong?! Just because I don't want to give you my real name doesn't mean I will be disloyal!"

"It does," Kaoru counters flatly.

Hacker-san sucks in a breath to argue more, and Kaoru cuts her off. "It does mean you are that much more likely to be disloyal. In this case, it is less a reflection on your overall character and more a reflection of your fear. From that fear, you will run away or turn on me to protect yourself. It's not that you're treacherous, more that you're cowardly. Don't bother correcting me, I've been there, done that."

At a loss, she fumes silently.

"And because I've been that wounded coward before, I knew not to corner you or you'd feel threatened. Hacker-san, listen to me: I was as shocked as you were. Did you stop to consider that I had – have – reason to be afraid, especially since I found you in an Ootori hospital? If you happen to be one of Yuuichi-san's people, or maybe even Ootori-sama's underlings, do you know how much I stand to lose?"

"No!" she bursts out indignantly. "I'm not working for one of those Ootoris or any other person apart from you at this moment! That's not fair, Kaoru-san, why don't you think about it from my perspective?! Your family is so powerful while I'm basically alone in this world and I have only my skills to rely on if I need to escape! You, a Hitachiin, do you understand powerlessness? Does Kaoru-san know what it means to be only as good as what you can do, without connections and money and a hotshot name?!"

"No, I don't," Kaoru admits truthfully. "I _am_ talented in design, but I have never had to rely on myself and myself alone. A year ago, I made the first commoner friend of my life and discovered that she used to hide under tables or inside cupboards by herself whenever there was a thunderstorm because she was afraid and there was no one there for her."

Hacker-san gazes at him evenly, a frown across her brow.

"So, no, Hacker-san, I can't understand fully as I've never experienced it. I used to think I knew what it was to be alone… until I realised that I've always had my twin brother, which is one more than what a lot of other people have. Now, I have a lot more than Hikaru in my life. I'm trying desperately to protect them, and I'm learning what powerlessness really feels like," he chuckles sadly. "Although I didn't know it then, the person who initially reached out to me and changed me was hurting inside, too – but that's why his priorities were exactly right. You see, he was reaching out to people so that _everyone_ could stop being lonely, and that is what I'm trying to do for you, Hacker-san."

Her eyes are fixed on her makeshift pantry – a brown cardboard box resting on top of a low plastic stool that is filled with more ajitsuke-nori snacks. She swallows once, hard, and says nothing.

"I believe you?" Kaoru offers, heading back downstairs. "When you say you have no alliance with any Ootori, I believe you. I'm a very instinctual person, like my mother, and I can't put my finger on what makes me believe you, but I do. Perhaps because you're such a mess, Hacker-san."

"You are too!" she retorts defensively, without thinking.

He laughs and falls into his armchair. "_No_, it's not an insult; it's the reason I believe you! Because Ootoris cannot handle messes – they either have to clean it up or they avoid it zealously. There are some things I have to – actually, _a lot_ of things I have to discuss with you: firstly, how are you paying your father's hospital – "

Abruptly, and all in a rush, she states, "My real full name is Iseya Kanon. I'm 23 years old and my birthday is on 9 January. I attended Ryuri Academy and went to Todai for my degree. The degree type is right but the transcript is faked – I graduated as the top-ranking graduate of my class with an almost perfect score but because of my looks and my hatred for public speaking, I was not the valedictorian speaker of my year, which made it even easier to cover my tracks. My mother was a horrible, criminal woman who abandoned my father and I when I was eleven; my father was a pool cleaner in several of the Ootoris' health spas and recreation centres until he developed this incurable disease; I have an onee-chan who takes after my mother while I take after my father; there is a significant age gap between me and her and I don't like talking about her because she left us too."

Slightly taken aback, Kaoru takes his time to process her words.

Hacker-san sighs and sinks to the carpet to wait, slouching ungracefully.

"… Ryuri Academy is privately owned and rather prestigious," Kaoru remarks.

"I told you my mother was a criminal," Hacker-san says. "Onee-chan followed right in her footsteps."

"They stole money?" Kaoru asks. "Were they the ones who paid for your education?"

She nods. "Only for Ryuri – I paid my way through Todai myself. They did more than steal money – Mum and onee-chan were so skilled at being professional thieves and burglars – they stole art, antiques, jewels… anything valuable, and occasionally they became employees in companies to embezzle large funds."

"What? That's cool!" Kaoru grins. "I had an onee-chan – well, not biological – who was a master thief, too! She was so totally cool! I looked up to her so much!"

"It is not cool!" snaps Hacker-san, stewing in turmoil. "Thieves are _selfish_ people, Kaoru-san. Anyway, why would Kaoru-san like a thief? To a thief, Kaoru-san would be target number one!"

"Ah, yeah, heh heh… my onee-chan broke my heart."

Quietly, Hacker-san says, "So did mine."

They smile, feeling a great deal of affinity for each other.

"Where are they now, your mother and your onee-chan?"

Hacker-san's expression shutters close. "Dead."

"I'm sorry," Kaoru tells her.

"Don't be," she says emotionlessly. "My Mum died a long time ago and onee-chan had it coming. Last I heard, she stole too much and double-crossed the wrong sort of people – they caught up to her in Ukraine and killed her."

"I'm sorry," Kaoru repeats, mildly disturbed.

Hacker-san shakes her head dismissively. "Although my father's job didn't bring in as much money as my mother's and sister's activities, his work was decent and he's a good man and… I've still got him, so…"

"He worked for the Ootoris, huh? Interesting. I didn't think the Ootoris gave such good employee benefits – I thought Ootori Private would be out of your price range, especially with long-term stay. What's this disease?"

"No, no," she contradicts, "Ootori Group employees are only able to stay in the lowest level wards for a maximum of one week per year at subsidised rates if they need to be hospitalised. My father isn't even an employee anymore, but Ootori Medical is the leading authority on the disease that he suffers from and they have been trying to find a cure for it – when my father tendered his resignation, they invited him to join their research studies for Meoloitis-YPL, which would heavily discount his medical fees on the condition that we waive all of our rights."

"That's dangerous, Hacker-san!" Kaoru exclaims, appalled. "Essentially it means the doctors have zero liability and can experiment on your father however they like!"

"Win some, lose some, Kaoru-san," she smiles grimly. "Without treatment, my father wouldn't survive past a year and they know we know it. It's an acute form of Meoloitis that has progressed to the paralytic stage because the YPL virus has infected the central nervous system. Actually, it's almost a miracle already, the way the doctors have sustained my father in this relatively healthy state. That's why… that's why when Kaoru-san and I first met, remember that you asked me to track down Ootori Fuyumi? It made me want to help... I thought if I could find some Ootori family secrets, I could gain some leverage over them in case anything happens to my father."

"Oh!" he says, startled. "I see, I see!"

Slowly, he contemplates everything she has said, combining this new information with the questions he'd came here with.

"Okay… Yes, I do see," he says musingly. "Hacker-san, we have some very serious problems. I was worried that the Ootoris have power over someone so close to you – now it's worse, 'cos if they find out that you're with me, they can hold your father to ransom. Or, wait, we should start from the beginning – is there a possibility that they already know you're with me?"

She looks at him dubiously. "I joined Kaoru-san of my own free will."

"I think I hired you of my own free will, too, and I don't think you're a spy meant to infiltrate my ranks."

"It doesn't _seem_ possible… If anyone intended for us to meet, this person would have to know the both of us equally well, Kaoru-san – not many people know me and I am close to no one but my father. Even if they held my father hostage, and even though I love my father, if it comes down to that, I would pick Kaoru-san. Probably. Ninety-nine percent. That's also why I didn't say anything to Kaoru-san."

"… We have to get rid of that habit of yours of not telling me things."

She splutters. "But! I thought that way before today! If Kaoru-san is a good employer, it's not logical to pick my dad over you and I, is it? My dad is old and dying and there's no cure whereas we are young and gifted! In that sort of situation, Kaoru-san, my father definitely knows me well enough to know which I would pick. It's honouring his wishes at the same time, you know – he just wants me to succeed."

Kaoru whistles. "That's cold."

"It's not, really," she says, opening a packet of ajitsuke-nori. "My father would gladly exchange his life for me to be happy. If he were put in a situation where he is being used against me to stop me from moving forward, he'd likely commit suicide the first chance he gets. Knowing that, why would I waste his sacrifice? Therefore, I already knew that if they threatened to stop his treatment to make me stop working with Kaoru-san, the single logical choice is to pick Kaoru-san. Any other option would result in a complete loss – no more Kaoru-san, no job and no more Dad."

"I get it," he agrees. "If I were terminally ill and someone tried to use me to prevent Hikaru from a bright future, I'd kill myself, too; but if Hikaru was the one who was sick, I don't know if I'll have the strength to pick my future over his life."

"Even if Hikaru-san was terminally ill? Even if all Hikaru-san would like is for Kaoru-san to succeed?" Hacker-san says knowingly. "My father and I have lived with this for years, long enough to be rational about it. Anyway, I prefer to make reasoned choices, Kaoru-san. When I make emotional choices I always regret them – like what I did to your father's company – I panicked badly when the hospital told me that they were going to raise the fees and I thought the specs plus my skills could help me get a higher-paid job somewhere else, and I was sick of my colleagues acting like they were better because they've been doing it longer… so, you see, thankfully I don't make those often."

Kaoru sniggers. "Uh huh. Right, first things first: Hacker-san, _tell me things_. I don't care if you think they're unimportant or if you've made up your mind – _tell me_. Maybe one day you'll be able to differentiate between the things that I need to be informed about and the things that I don't, but today is not the day."

"Hey! I can exercise my judgement!"

Kaoru gives her a dull look. "Nah."

"It's not like Kaoru-san has that much free time to – "

"I'll make the time for you," he interjects. "Two: since Hacker-san is sure, and on your current salary you can afford the higher fees, right? Then I guess we don't need to change your father's hospital. Three: I need_ proper_ documents from you _this time_ and I can lock it up in the family safe if you're insecure about it – oh, this reminds me, how many languages do you know?"

"Eleven," she says. "I didn't lie about that, and I'm learning more each day!"

"_Really._" Kaoru arches an eyebrow.

She nods guilelessly.

"Which eleven?" he asks, still sceptical.

"Japanese, English, C, C#, C++, Python, Ruby on Rails, Lisp, Haskell, Java – "

"Stop!" Kaoru commands, rolling his eyes. "Actual human languages only!"

Blankly, she stares at him.

"Excluding programming languages," he sighs.

"Two. Japanese and English."

Kaoru buries his face in his hands and laughs.

"Fine," he wheezes. "Next: find out about Haninozuka Mitsukuni's shareholdings in foreign and local automotive companies. Start from Volkswagen AG – I don't know if he is operating under another name or if he is buying the shares through his parents or someone else."

"Got it."

"Four – no, Five: collect as much information on Princess Michelle of Monale as possible for me. Six: since you have a vested interest in the Ootoris, and also to consolidate your knowledge, see how much you can dig up about – "

"I already have, Kaoru-san."

Hacker-san rises to her feet to head over to a panel of buttons situated on the left arm of the desk that hosts her computer. When Kaoru attempts to tag along, she squawks excitedly, "Stay there, stay there!"

The projector flickers to life and displays a giant replica of her game on the wall that Kaoru's chair is facing.

"Ta-daa!"

"Wow. This makes me feel incredibly lazy," he drawls. "Is this how it feels like to be a boss? I could get used to it."

She gives him a dirty look, as he'd known she would. The impact is decreased by the pride that is oozing out of her. "And again, ta-daa!"

The game is swapped for the Inception video on YouTube.

Hacker-san lifts the panel from its groove in the table and brings it around to him, launching into teaching mode. "This is screen A. Kaoru-san's computer screens are recorded in the system as 'A' and 'B'. If Kaoru-san wants the projector to show both screens, you push button 'C', otherwise it will display only 'A' or 'B'."

Kaoru tests it out accordingly. "This must be your idea of heaven."

"It's useful!" she rambles on. "Suitable for group conferences! Ah, the numbered buttons are mine. The system reads my computer as '1', '2', '3' all the way up to '9'. To display all of my screens simultaneously, you press '10'. The coloured buttons are for the TV screens – red for PS3, yellow for Wii, blue for Xbox, green for all three. The small purple arrows control the volume; the white and black arrows are for the lights on the whole of this floor – white makes them brighter, black makes them dimmer."

"And so you decided to use your expensive, advanced equipment and technology to play games," he deadpans.

Pityingly, Hacker-san shakes her head. "Expensive equipment is to make and play games, Kaoru-san."

Kaoru snorts.

"Besides, the TVs have a purpose. I've hacked the broadcasters so we have cable TV and access to worldwide news channels. That way, we can watch any breaking news and find out about current affairs if we aren't fast enough to know about it before it happens."

"Great," he praises. "Meanwhile, I get to perch on a throne and supervise everything. How luxurious."

"Actually, it's so that Kaoru-san will not be annoying when I have to work. If you can see everything from there, you won't have to walk about or breathe down my neck," she rebuffs him dispassionately, walking back to her computer and running her hands along the edge of one of the nine screens, caressing it lovingly.

"You – it is like you pulled the rug out from under me."

Her eyes bug out. "That's – that's not what I – when I was working at Kaoru-san's father's company, the other people in the office wouldn't stop chatting and they always tried to peek at my work like they didn't think I could do it! I – I just need space, I'm not stopping Kaoru-san from moving around!"

"Yes, yes," he says. "Show me what you've got on the Ootoris."

She sits down and rapidly brings up a couple of files in a few clicks. Kaoru observes the screens she places the documents in and presses the corresponding buttons to read her research.

After ten minutes, he leans back, fingers tapping thoughtfully on his armrest.

"This is very well done," he says finally. "100% accuracy. Normally it is difficult enough to uncover substantial information about that family, much less get it right."

Hacker-san beams, displaying her crooked teeth.

"What do you think?" Kaoru turns to her.

"What 'what do I think'?" she replies, baffled.

"These are all facts or history. Our goal is to analyse their motivations and predict their movements. I'm on Kyouya-senpai's side, by now you should know this – his protection and progress is key. Have you extrapolated anything from these facts? Can we spot any weaknesses? What do they want?"

"How should I know?" Hacker-san asks sourly. "People want what they want."

"For example, there: the course of Akito-san's life is exactly identical to Yuuichi-san's. What does it mean to you?"

She thinks for several moments, then shrugs.

"Or, here: Kiyomi-san was originally engaged to marry someone else, and she broke it off to choose Yuuichi-san," he points. "What does that tell us about Kiyomi-san and Yuuichi-san?"

Hacker-san ponders over it… and shrugs. "That they fell in love?"

Amused, Kaoru frowns at her. "Hacker-san, you don't have much social awareness and interpersonal skill, do you?"

"Huh? You hired me for my technological genius! Why do I suddenly have to have EQ?!" she retorts, inordinately touchy – clearly a sore topic for her.

"Don't worry," he says soothingly, standing up. "I suspected I might have to find a Hotta for you."

From his schoolbag, he withdraws a folder and hands it to her. "This is one of two major things we have to discuss today – recruitment."

"Ugh," she partially stifles a groan. "What is a 'Hotta'? Ootori Kyouya's servant, that Hotta?"

"Yes. Someone who can interpret the facts that you gather – give it emotional context, cultural bases and social understanding."

Reluctantly, she flips through the papers. "Can't Kaoru-san be my Hotta? I thought Kaoru-san has high EQ."

He smiles. "Emotions are open to a range of interpretations, Hacker-san. I need someone to bounce off opinions with, and in an emergency I might need fully considered advice instead of filling in the gaps myself – it's easy to miss some critical dimensions under pressure."

Hacker-san closes the folder. "I could get the information to Kaoru-san in plenty of time."

"You can't guarantee that," he says. "It won't be terrible. It's lonely to work alone all the time."

"No it isn't," she insists. "I could… learn some social skill or… something."

"After twenty-three years? Come on, Hacker-san. Like you said, I hired you for a certain metiér – you don't have to do everything."

She switches her attention to the folder once more, radiating unwillingness.

"Is it because you don't want to share this house?" Kaoru asks dryly. "I'm sure other people have their own homes."

"I'll booby trap the staircase," she grouses.

"So, that's a list of some of the top psychologists and counsellors in the country. A few are doing very well for themselves, but others are earning a middling or average income despite their talent. I thought we could interview a handful of them that we both like – read their profiles and see if you have any preferences?"

She says nothing.

Kaoru suppresses a sigh. This is a classic illustration of how difficult prodigious people can be – his grandmother and his mother are like that, and many of the fashion designers who are at the pinnacle of their profession are way more diva than this, yet what can one –

Mentally berating himself, he says, "Hacker-san, if you don't work well with that person – whoever he or she is – then I drop that person, not you."

Hacker-san raises her head.

"Okay? I need a team – that's non-negotiable. You're part of it, they aren't; they have to fit you and not the other way round. I'm not going to kick you out of your beloved Akiba apartment, all right? So, give it a try," he nods at the document emphatically.

She does, which tells Kaoru that he'd hit the nail on its head.

Patiently, he wanders into the bathroom to inspect it. It's been left untouched – Hacker-san evidently doesn't much care for facilities to beautify herself.

A loud gasp is heard.

"What?" Kaoru asks anxiously, sticking his head out and nearly crashing straight into Hacker-san.

"_This one!_" she yells, brandishing a page at him. "This person! I want this person! Kaoru-san, we have to have this person!"

He rescues the paper from her haphazardly windmilling grip. "Associate Professor Yukina Yumeji?"

"Yes!" she roars rabidly.

"… Dare I ask why?"

"Yukina-sama is – "

"How come this person is a 'sama' while – "

" – one of the creators and Game Masters of – "

" – I, your employer, am not?"

" – Alchemy Academy!"

"Woah! Seriously?!" Kaoru looks at the profile like it should have revealed this to him. "I love that game!"

"Me too! It's super – "

" – Intelligent!" he finishes for her. "Difficult as hell to get the potions right, but sooooo _rewarding_."

"_Sooooo rewarding_," echoes Hacker-san with a drugged-out grin. "I didn't know Kaoru-san played."

"I should have known _you_ played," he snorts. "Which of the four houses are you in?"

"Veridier."

"No way! So am I! Is your level high enough to join the House Wars?"

"High _enough_?" she scoffs. "My username is 'airborne'."

"Oh god, that's _you_?! You're 'airborne'?"

"Yeah," she confirms smugly. "I can log in to prove it."

"Do that! I wanna try playing at that sort of level, god, you must be crazy powerful – the forums say that you solo tanked against 6 players to guard the Elixir of Life for twelve whole minutes before anyone else could regenerate and come to your help, is that true?"

"Yeah – it was a near thing, I barely kept my HP up; I never want to do that again," she shudders.

"Unbelievable!" Kaoru gapes. "But! Eh, wait wait wait! No, wait, we got sidetracked! Important business first! Are you sure Yukina Yumeji is a creator of that game? I didn't find anything like that."

"Yes. Yukina-sama is not officially credited but her husband is, and I follow their web presence. Yukina-sama's husband and brother are game developers and fanatics, and in one of the interviews, her husband said that she was a driving force in the creation of the complex player-to-player interactions of Alchemy Academy. Maybe I should just put it this way since Kaoru-san is familiar with the game: Yukina Yumeji-sama's username is 'Certifiable'."

"_No!_" he hoots. "Oh no! That sadistic GM is her?!"

"It's her," Hacker-san croaks a laugh. "She teaches psychology at the University of Tokyo, doesn't she? It's worse because she has GM powers, so she has special potions that no one else has and she drops them in the middle of the battlefields to see how gamers will react. Her husband says she can't help conducting psychological and sociological experiments on people, and games are a ready-made platform for her."

"And everyone slaughters everyone else, of course. You want someone like that in our team? You sure?"

"Now that Kaoru-san knows her in-game identity, what does Kaoru-san think of her understanding of human nature and behaviour?"

"… Insanely brilliant, obviously. No, brilliantly insane. Right, I take your point. Tomorrow after school, we'll crash one of her lectures at Todai and possibly talk to her later. I'll pick you up at 4-4:15 in a disguise."

"Okay," she says. "I'll prepare information on Yukina-sama for Kaoru-san."

"Great, thanks." Kaoru checks his watch – he's expected at Honey's in the evening for their scheduled Cake Night. "Second major thing I need from you today – wow, now I'm really grateful you read up on the Ootoris yourself – find out the new players to the Japanese technological sector in the past one year – something related to software, games and – "

"Kaoru-san, that's broad and generic and totally unhelpful."

"I can't provide any precision and I don't know what I'm looking for!" he huffs exasperatedly. "I only know I'll know it when I see it!"

Hacker-san scratches her scalp; a sprinkle of dry whitish flakes falls out.

"Let's try this," Kaoru suggests, "I'll give you the individual components to my deduction and you can see if that narrows it down for you. This new player came onto the scene somewhere during the past year or so. There will be something to do with electronic toys or computer and console games. Probably software too – the existence of this new player will not escape my father and his company. This new player has either made moves towards Ichijo Okiko-sama's family business or is manoeuvring into a position that will allow a takeover of – "

"Q.E.D., Inc.?"

"_Yes!_" he cries fervently, on tenterhooks. "What is this company? Show me, quickly! How do you know, Hacker-san?"

Obligingly, she opens her web browser and types in the search terms. "Of course I know, Kaoru-san. I have to keep track of news in this industry to know about the latest hardware and software – also, this is my profession and technology is the love of my life, or has Kaoru-san forgotten in his panic?"

"… Just call up the information."

"Can you go and sit in your chair?"

"Can't. Too jumpy."

"You're cramping me."

"I'll go away when I get my info."

"I can't work unless you goes away."

"Argh!" Kaoru stomps to his chair. "Not limiting my movement, my arse!"

"As soon as you went away, the page loaded," Hacker-san tells him.

"As soon as I go away, you're getting a pay cut."

"I have enough for one meal every two days, but if I receive a pay cut, it might become one meal per week."

"You _chose_ your games over food!"

"You don't want the neighbours to find a body in the house, Kaoru-san. Very bad publicity."

"You ingrate! Who gave you that computer, I ask you?"

"See, you could have waited, Kaoru-san – the information's on the wall now but you aren't paying any attention to it."

Kaoru inhales, counts to ten, and exhales. The murderous feeling does not pass. "You've just convinced me that I absolutely need more team members. Start talking about Q.E.D. before I decide to ring Hotta to dispose of you."

"It's all there," Hacker-san says, referring to the official website and other nerd blogs that she no doubt frequents. "Q.E.D. is an American company, incorporated within the time frame that Kaoru-san had set. Quite low profile but successful, they've taken over a few established smaller companies and mostly encouraged innovation for their marketable products. Importantly, they fulfil the other criteria of making moves towards Eon Corporation, or _I-on Kabushiki-Gaisha_."

"So, Eon is not theirs yet?"

"Q.E.D. has acquired a portion of Eon's shares, about 2%, that seems to be the extent of it. As I'm sure Kaoru-san already knows, Eon hasn't been doing very well even though it used to be such an electronics mega-giant – that move was puzzling, until Q.E.D. used it as a springboard to nab those smaller companies I mentioned earlier. It was cheaper and more convenient to buy Eon shares, I suppose, since it is listed on the stock exchange. Then, Q.E.D. apparently built connections with a number of subsidiaries and privately-owned businesses and either seized those shares or those personnel away from the main operating branch of Eon. It's clever in hindsight but people laughed at them at first, I think."

_This sounds more and more like them. Go in for Eon, pretend to go off and circle back again after amassing resources._

"I think that Q.E.D is run by three of my seniors, does Hacker-san have any way to verify that?"

"Which three?" She opens a number of other programs.

"Ootori Kyouya, Haninozuka Mitsukuni, Morinozuka Takashi. I especially want to know what Mori-senpai has been up to. It makes sense – they get themselves incorporated in the US to gain legal personality, which would allow them to transact in Japan in the name of the company despite none of them being of age. Hiding behind the corporate veil – totally Kyouya-senpai's style; he uses our club to get up to all sorts of things all the time. And that name! Quod erat demonstrandum! Hilarious!"

"The board of Q.E.D consists of three directors and shareholders," Hacker-san reports. "Western names, three males, the initials of their surnames form the company name."

"Is one of them the company secretary? Focus on him; that's probably Mori-senpai."

"There is, but there isn't much about him. Other officers of the company represent it – the directors and secretary themselves limit themselves to board duties. I have tagged the chief executive and will trace him as of now, Kaoru-san. His name is Harvey Atherton."

He gives her the thumbs-up.

"The guy is based in California, graduate of Caltech, CMS department, married to a Japanese woman, no kids, travels a fair bit – travels with her… she must be his translator! Wow, Kaoru-san, you'll like her, she knows about 6 or 7 actual human languages!"

"I can't figure out if that was meant to be sarcastic."

"Huh?"

"Never mind."

"… Ohh, no wonder. Harvey Atherton's wife is one of those privileged – you know, like you, Kaoru-san! Spent her childhood visiting foreign countries and learning their languages with her father and uncle when they were making deals for the importation of food into Japan – she was her uncle's favoured niece, her uncle is that guy who died from canc – hey!"

Kaoru had leapt up at 'importation of food' and raced to Hacker-san's side, crowding her in order to see the screen. "Tomimeshi! Is it Tomimeshi?!"

"You could have flicked to screen 4 if you wanted to – "

"Hacker-san, Hacker-san, it's them! It's them, what the hell, it really is them! Emily Atherton is Noda Emiri!"

"How does that – "

"Ahh! We did it! We did it!" Kaoru dances on the carpeted floor ecstatically.

Nonplussed, Hacker-san lets him work it out of his system.

"Hacker-san, I'll treat you to dinner tonight as a reward!"

"Really?" she goes with the flow. "There's this place I love – actually I love all of Akiba – but I usually can't afford to eat there!"

"Today you can," Kaoru declares happily. "This has given me a couple more ideas – you! You, Hacker-san, the consummate techie! I need some things from you, we'll hash them out over food! Let's go!"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Honey-senpai!" Kaoru chirps sweetly, wheeling his luggage in behind him.

"Kao-chan!" Honey adopts the same tone, blossoms twinkling.

"Honey-senpai, have I told you lately that you're brilliant?"

Genuinely caught off guard, Honey blinks once, that pair of pellucid caramel brown eyes going wide.

He giggles. "Kao-chan, have I told you lately that you're wonderful?"

Flat against the wall and sweating profusely, Yasuchika creeps by. He looks askance at Kaoru, unnerved by Kaoru's syrupy exchange with his alien elder brother and slinks off hurriedly.

Kaoru deposits his things in his senior's room and accompanies Honey to the main living hall, where the family is lounging before bedtime.

"Yorihisa-sama! Tsukishi-sama!"

"Ah, Kaoru-kun, you're here."

Kaoru bows. "Thank you for having me. I'm sorry for the inconvenience."

"Not at all, not at all," Honey's mother says hospitably. "Kaoru-kun has been working hard, updating my husband and I every week about the fun activities that you children are involved in – being able to chat face-to-face with Kaoru-kun is good."

"A glass of umeshu, Kaoru-kun?" Honey's father asks from behind a hefty tome of literature.

"Yes, please," Kaoru grins. To the servant, he says, "On the rocks."

Tsukishi-sama engages them in a low voice – it's warm and comfortable, almost like being home, and Kaoru reflects on the unending benefits of having strong ties with his friends' parents. Honey _never_ does any homework or readings past 7:30 PM because it affects his restful sleep, yet he invariably tops his class and level – the first time the club members were alerted to this fact, they'd reacted with uniform astonishment and admiration bordering on veneration. It's a struggle to finish their homework by a respectable time everyday – being the educational institution for the leaders of tomorrow and the children of the elite, Ouran inundates its students with a deluge of work to maintain its high academic standards. Everything else is negligible to the wealthy and powerful parents; this is the sole exception. Even Tamaki has had to push his bedtime to 11 PM every so often – most ordinary people are already in awe of his and Mori-senpai's ability to complete revision by 9 PM, and during exam periods it's customary for everyone to conclude only in the wee hours.

It's a feat of unimaginable proportions to accomplish Honey's results on such a study routine. Were it not for Kyouya's propensity to tend to his business affairs before homework, he might be able to match this record. It's another one of those things that Kaoru had known but not _truly known_ – how organised and outstanding his seniors have been for years.

When the Haninozuka parents decide to retire for the night, Honey takes one of Kaoru's hands and leads him to the side dining room that is suffused with candlelight, where cakes have been laid out for them.

Kaoru selects the chocolate rose cake and serves a slice for himself, prattling away with his senior about the daily trivialities in their lives. There's a sense of peace and intimacy in the air, a contentment that was once synonymous with Hikaru. Honey feeds him and he feeds Honey – in this place they are safe and free, and Kaoru reaches for his senior.

"Thank you," he whispers, not sure what he's referring to.

Honey knows. Softly, "You're welcome, Kao-chan."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"… Another minute… " Kaoru scrunches up underneath the blankets, clutching Usa-chan to himself.

"No, no more minutes! Kao-chan's going to be late for school!"

Someone squeezes into the space beside Kaoru.

"Kao-chan," Honey singsongs, wrapping himself around him and kissing his brow. "Good morning!"

"Uuuhhh… Alarm… hasn't…"

"There isn't going to be an alarm, Kao-chan. I don't need one to wake up, and I thought I would be Kao-chan's alarm."

Kaoru pries his eyes open and is confronted by strands of blond hair. Honey is fully dressed but back in his half of the bed, his head propped by an elbow that's prodding into Kaoru's pillow.

"Did you know you move quite a bit when you sleep, Kao-chan? I'm surprised Kyou-chan lets you sleep in his bed."

Kaoru gazes at him blearily.

"I fetched extra layers of blankets to weigh Kao-chan down, and it worked. Now, Kao-chan, up."

With a yawn, Kaoru sits up and moves no further, sagging like a rag doll. "Sorry, senpai. Maybe because senpai is a light sleeper, but, yeah, if something is pressing down on me, I stop. Kyouya-senpai sleeps under, what, four, five layers?"

"And Kyou-chan sleeps like the dead anyway," Honey concurs, tugging Kaoru to his feet and pushing him in the direction of the bathroom.

After his regular ablutions, Kaoru is halfway into his school uniform when he realises that Honey has woken him up at a much earlier time than he would have chosen himself. Argh, these healthy lifestyle people! Kyouya always lets him sleep till the last minute.

"Honey-senpai!" he wails, flinging open the door and marching into the bedroom while buttoning his shirt. "It's early!"

"Ehh? It's not early! It's just right for Kao-chan and I to have a nice breakfast!"

Aggrieved, Kaoru complains all the way to the main dining hall; Honey smiles wryly and doesn't register any of it.

"Any later and the servants will have cleared the table, Mitsukuni," Yorihisa says flippantly, exiting with his wife as Kaoru and Honey pass through the same entrance.

… The entire family is not only up and about, they're done with their morning meal. As usual for this household, then.

He folds into his chair, shaking his head. "From Kyouya-senpai's house to your house, Honey-senpai, the transition is too huge. I have culture shock."

"I have to remember to tell Kyou-chan's staff the night before that I require breakfast at an earlier hour," Honey discloses. "I think I scared them that first morning."

Kaoru laughs into his rice. "Poor things! Kyouya-senpai's people don't scare easily. Speaking of this subject, Honey-senpai, I didn't know you had German lessons with Kyouya-senpai! Can I join you for English next time?"

Honey jerks his head upwards, shrewdness in his eyes.

"Sure, Kao-chan."

"Really?" he cheers. "Yay!"

"Did Kyou-chan tell you?"

"Yeah," Kaoru replies unthinkingly and backtracks hastily. "Oh! Um, Kyouya-senpai was very secretive, Honey-senpai! I guessed part of it myself! He wouldn't have told me anything that Honey-senpai had entrusted to him in confidence!"

Honey beams brightly. "No, no, it's fine. I just thought it was intriguing that Kyou-chan brought it up with Kao-chan."

"… Why?" he asks tentatively.

"Hee hee. Don't know. Just… thought it was intriguing."

Irritably, Kaoru snags a piece of egg with his chopsticks. "Could you be any more vague, Honey-senpai?"

"Kao-chan, you know… when one sacrifices oneself to help another, it could actually be painful to the person being helped, especially when that sacrificed person is of importance to them."

"Wha – where is that coming from, senpai?"

"A reminder," Honey asserts, "that I'm afraid Kyou-chan won't know to say to you until it's too late."

"Huh? Honey-senpai?"

"The problem with intense concentration, Kao-chan, is that – Kao-chan is a photographer, yes? Which two factors determine depth of field?"

"The distance between the camera and the subject, and the speed of the lens taking the photo," Kaoru recites dutifully.

"Yes, and without adjusting the zoom, the closer you are to a subject…?"

"The less of the image will appear in focus."

Honey nods. "The mind of a person who is absorbed in his or her plans is as a camera that constantly captures selective focus bokeh images, where the subject is seen in detail but everything else surrounding it fades to a blur. The person may think of certain actions as being advantageous _at the time of the action_, a component of the overall strategy, only to realise in the future that the need to focus on one thing has come at the expense of something else, and in blurring the rims of the photograph, that 'something else' has slipped past the cracks."

Kaoru makes a sound at the back of his throat. "Honey-senpai, really, this – "

"Mere food for thought, Kao-chan."

Annoyed, Kaoru sets down his bowl on the table. "Why does _everyone_ seem to think I am or will be in danger?! How come Tono doesn't get this from all of you?! Am I that much weaker? Am I that defenceless?"

"No, Kao-chan! No! It's because Tama-chan wants everyone to be happy, Tama-chan wants everyone to be together! No matter how much Tama-chan loves Kyou-chan, he would prioritise our collective wellbeing over Kyou-chan's ambitions! He would never use himself as a bartering chip as though he's worthless, but Kao-chan would!"

Kaoru recoils a little, and Honey deflates.

"T-Tono traded himself in for his mother."

"Because that was the way for everyone to live."

"I don't get it, senpai! I also want everybody to be happy!" he cries, frustrated. "Why is it that when Tono does it, it's right, but when I do it, it's wrong?"

"Kao-chan!" snaps an authoritative voice.

Kaoru blanches and goes quiet.

"Stop comparing yourself to Tama-chan. You're different people."

"I'm not," Kaoru denies, thinking_ 'Different, or lesser?' _and feeling an ache that is threaded through with an almost intolerable _empathy_.

The irony does not escape him.

Kaoru hates irony.

"Different."

He looks at his senior.

"Different, not lesser," pronounces Honey.

"Why? How does Honey-senpai know? Is – is it the same for Kyouya-senpai and his father, too?"

"Kao-chan should not be concerned with that."

"I knew you'd know the answer!" Kaoru protests. "Honey-senpai, tell me!"

"No. Eat up, Kao-chan, we leave in ten minutes."

Kaoru calls his senior's name again and again, determinedly harassing him.

"You said!" he deplores. "Honey-senpai said that if I didn't understand things, I could list them out to you! You promised!"

Honey takes hold of his hand. "Not if I think it will harm you, Kao-chan. I do not think it is wise for Kao-chan to know so much about Ootori Yoshio-sama, and Kyou-chan is not ready for the answer."

The ramifications of those words – the overtones and undertones stored within them are bursting at the seams.

Kaoru can't help but push. "Why would – "

"There is something that neither Kao-chan nor Kyou-chan understands: knowing too much about other people puts you in their power, they have a claim on you, you are forced to understand their reasons for doing things and then you are weakened."

"Senpai, please – "

"Kao-chan, please."

Kaoru slumps in defeat.

Keeping the sulk at bay, he calls for his limousine, gathers his things and crawls in with Honey, who will be dropped off at the university after Ouran. His senior permits him to rest his head in his lap – Kaoru is experiencing that combination of fatigue and restlessness, thoughts churning away in spite of his efforts.

What does it mean, that Kyouya is not ready to hear it? Is it really that Ootori-sama is better? More steadfast than Kyouya? Kaoru knows that his inability to meet Kyouya's questions that day had been due to his lack of insight towards Ootori-sama as he has not had the opportunity to interact with him; for the duration of those lessons, Honey must have seen _something_ – grasped the complex nuances of this family. Why can't Kaoru know it too? His damnable 'artistic soul'? What's so harmful about having him understand Ootori-sama's reasons and motivations? Wouldn't it be nice for Ootori-sama to be human, or at least less inhuman than he is now? Who's to say Kaoru'll end up like Ootori Okiko? Having superior sensitivity doesn't mean that –

Kaoru gasps, mind blown.

"There is no difference," he breathes.

Honey's body goes rigid, proving him right.

Carefully, Kaoru levers himself into an upright position. "Isn't it? The only conclusion."

His senior responds with a deep sigh, letting his chin fall on Usa-chan's ears.

"Say something, senpai," Kaoru pleads. "Say something?"

"What led Kao-chan to this theory?" he asks calmly.

"If Kyouya-senpai shouldn't know it," Kaoru begins haltingly, his speculations in a jumble, "then the answer can't be good, that is, that Ootori-sama is the stronger businessman between them. But then I thought: apart from the natural differences from human to human, the Ootori kids are very similar to their father in terms of core personality… and children always say something about how the parents are like. I've never believed that Kyouya-senpai is deficient in any way – it's just that Kyouya-senpai's attachments are discernible while Ootori-sama's are not, and – and if Kyouya-senpai could be moved, if Yuuichi-san and Fuyumi-san sincerely love their spouses… Kyouya-senpai comes across as frightening to the people who don't know him, I wonder if that's why Ootori-sama feels so unapproachable to me? Something that Honey-senpai said really struck me – I mean, why is Honey-senpai unwilling to have me understand Ootori-sama? Is it _me_ in particular or it is everyone? Isn't it implicit in that statement that I will be able to understand Ootori-sama if I tried? I merged it with some other knowledge I already had – that, um, apparently my vision and aesthetic might have been shared by Okiko-sama and we know that those traits didn't serve her well in that household… If it is possible for me to understand Ootori-sama, it follows that it was possible for Okiko-sama to understand as well – further, Okiko-sama was in a position to observe him and connect with him! Well, Ootori-sama was young once, wasn't he? If he's anything like his children, he must have been emotionally susceptible to some degree at some point of his life… It was a shot in the dark – if Okiko-sama was Ootori-sama's special person, then Ootori-sama's coldness and detachment is not because he has never experienced happiness, but that he had _lost _that happiness, and that indicates that Ootori Yoshio-sama is the version of Kyouya-senpai that had failed to protect _his_ version of Tono, which translates to… there is no material difference in capability, only in their personal histories."

Honey gazes at him, eyes sparkling with mirth. "I don't know whether to be angry or proud, Kao-chan."

Stunned, Kaoru crashes back against the leather of his seat with an arm across his face. _My god. I'm correct, it's true!_

"Not a word to Kyou-chan, do you understand? I was careless, I didn't know Kao-chan had such knowledge of Okiko-sama. My mother says that Okiko-sama lived her life like a candle in the wind, and those who knew her also knew that she was too fragile to last under her parents-in-law. Regardless of whether any or all of the children know about how their father felt – feels – towards their mother, it remains unknown if Ootori Yoshio-sama let his wife down. They necessarily have a unique view of their parents, and it is not Kao-chan's place to interfere."

Dumbly, Kaoru nods his assent.

"Why was Kao-chan prying into the differences between Kyou-chan and his father?"

"Kyouya-senpai and I were talking about who would influence who in a match-up between Ootori-sama and Tono, and I picked Ootori-sama to win without a solid reason to back it up."

A tinkling, crystal-glass giggle. "I see, I see. My choice is the same as Kao-chan's. That's how I first formed my hypotheses about Kyou-chan's father – if nobody can touch his heart anymore, and he doesn't feel pride for anything except his _children's _accomplishments, it must mean his heart is gone. Given away to someone else. Kao-chan, you know, I think my parents love each other? I think Takashi's parents love each other too, but they only had two children. Kyou-chan's parents had four."

"Honey-senpai!" Kaoru screeches, scandalised and grossed out.

"On top of that, Kyou-chan's father has never remarried and never found anyone new, just buries himself in work all day long or devotes his effort to cultivating his children. That family is driven to succeed, but no one loves work this much. Has Kao-chan noticed that Akito-san's workload is crushing him?"

"Huh? Is it?"

"_Yes_, Kao-chan. As Kao-chan said, both parents and children are put on display through their bond – depend upon it that Kyou-chan and his siblings have inherited something of their mother. Akito-san is the only one without a pillar of strength, and already he's walking in his father's path."

Kaoru gawks at his senior. "I never thought of it that way!"

Honey smiles sadly at him.

"Now I feel doubly sorry for him! The odds are _stacked _against Akito-san, aren't they?"

"Akito-san will reject most – if not all – people who come to him, and he himself will never seek out other people. If it is to happen for him, it must be a bolt out of the blue, as it was for Kyou-chan. The greatest cunning is to have none at all."

Kaoru cackles. "I'd like front row seats for that!"

"Kao-chan," Honey warns sternly, "don't forget the advice I've given you today."

"But Honey-senpai still won't tell me why Tono is better," he says plaintively.

"Does Kao-chan think that I can be manipulated into continuing this damaging comparison exercise by your deliberate misunderstanding?"

He pouts, foiled by his senior's supremacy.

"If Kao-chan wants everyone to be happy, then in the forefront of your mind, always store a picture of that happiness. Everything else is extraneous."

"What, my own kotatsu dream?"

"If you like," Honey allows. "Describe it to me?"

"You can't be serious."

"It will put me at ease," cajoles Honey, using Usa-chan as a weapon of persuasion by making it dance around cutely in Kaoru's sphere of vision.

Feeling moderately silly, Kaoru hems and haws. "Um. My family and all of you. Uhh, yeah."

"Where is everyone seated? Is there food on the table?"

"Honey-sen – "

"Kao-chan."

Nettled, Kaoru demands, "You want me to say stuff like, 'We're going to have a hexagon kotatsu, blah blah, and I'm going to put food in my Haruhi's bowl, blah blah blah, and I'm going to tell jokes to my parents and listen to my grandmother's divine knowledge about historical dramas, blabbity blabbity blah'?"

"That was classic Hika-chan," Honey says with palpable humour, and Kaoru can't refrain from cracking up. "But I know that Kao-chan can be very mean with his words, too."

Somewhat abashed, Kaoru throws his hands up in surrender. "Uugh, fine! Honey-senpai is eating strawberry cheesecake with Usa-chan in your arms, Mori-senpai is reading a book and drinking tea, Kyouya- senpai is attempting world domination with his laptop, Haruhi is on her third helping of food, Hikaru is making Tono's life hell, my parents are making eyes at one another, both my grandfathers and one of my grandmothers are chatting like normal people, that flower-headed demon lady is being a nuisance to her new grandchild, who I kind of hope turns out to be a girl, and my sister will loudly announce to the table the ugliness of Grandmother's hairstyle. Ahh… that'll be the day; three versus one!"

The car comes to a pause in the designated student drop-off porch.

"Satisfied, Honey-senpai?" Kaoru asks with a mock-corny grin.

Honey's grin is the spitting image of his.

Kaoru leans over to peck his senior's cheek before scrambling out. "See you tomorrow at – "

Immediately, he is glomped without ceremony. "Kaoru, I missed you so much! The whole night, I tossed and turned, I – "

" – club! Yes, Hikaru, I was dying from my yearning for you – "

" – wondered if my Kaoru was awake and thinking of me or if you'd been seduced by Honey-senpai's wily charms – "

" – Uh huh."

"Is that so, Hika-chan? Yesterday when we rang Hika-chan, you seemed to be having lots of fun staying over at Tama-chan's house, so much so that you and Tama-chan were inseparable even during bathtime!"

A number of girls hanging around the porch to wait for their friends light up with something fiendish.

Kaoru shakes with inaudible laughter as Hikaru flushes pink.

"H-Honey-senpai! That was – ! It was easier that way!"

Honey assumes an aura of naïveté that never bodes well. He's going to say something along the lines of, "Easier to do what, Hika-chan?", Kaoru can just _tell_.

Dragging his brother into the school building and waving as he goes, he calls out, "Have a great day at uni, Honey-senpai!"

Honey waves back – Kaoru sees that.

What he doesn't see is a blond head drooping against the wound-down window with yet another sigh, deeper than the one earlier. "Like I thought… around Kao-chan's kotatsu, there is no Kao-chan."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) Ajitsuke-nori is a type of seaweed snack – flavoured and sold in little packets, eaten by themselves and curiously addictive. Nori by itself is the seaweed that is wrapped around sushi, usually less flavoured because the rice and ingredients of the sushi is enough.

(b) "Ars longa, vita brevis, occasio praeceps, experimentum periculosum, iudicium difficile." = "Life is short, the art (craft/skill) long, opportunity fleeting, experiment treacherous, judgement difficult."

A significant part of the programming community subscribes to the 'ars longa, vita brevis' philosophy – really, any skill that takes a long time to master will understand the meaning of those words and the dedication that goes into perfecting one's craft. Kaoru has isolated the 'experimentum periculosum' bit as a comeback – his own craft will also take a lifetime to master.

(c) Akihabara Electric Town (秋葉原電気街 Akihabara Denki Gai), also known as Akiba, is Tokyo's electronics district. Super otaku town.

(d) 'Todai' is the Japanese shorthand for the University of Tokyo – '**To**kyo **Dai**gaku'.

(e) Quod erat demonstrandum actually is quite funny (to me) in relation to Mitsukuni and Kyouya, especially – it means '(something) which was to be proved; which was to be demonstrated'. The phrase is traditionally placed in its abbreviated form (Q.E.D.) at the end of a mathematical proof or philosophical argument when what was specified in the enunciation — and in the setting-out — has been exactly restated as the conclusion of the demonstration. The abbreviation thus signals the completion of the proof.

Kyouya habitually does this – usually, the only time the rest finds out about his actions are at the conclusion, by which time there is nothing to be done. Mitsukuni and Takashi have done this at least once, too, when they prepared everything for university quietly and sprang it on the others suddenly, as well as preparing to come back to the club as alumni. So it's kind of like, their ability to do something will be proved in the doing itself, full stop.

Which is what is happening now – the company QED Inc is the completion of their proof that they are as amazing as they know they are. There's something very matter-of-fact in their certainty in themselves, and that's very, _very_ cool. Consistent with my interpretation of either of them, too.

(f) The corporate veil is this beautiful (evil) thing that many directors use to get away with personal liability. Companies have what is known as 'separate legal personality', which is why they can sue and be sued in their own name, as well as own property. This means that, unless exceptional circumstances exist, the debts of a company cannot be traced to the directors even though the directors are the ones who incurred the losses – directors and shareholders have limited personal liability for the debts of a company. It's the sort of thing that Kyouya loves – that is why my take on Kyouya in the previous chapters is that he views himself as an 'employee/officer' of the host club – he would never claim to _be the club_ nor does he want to be; the artificial distinction between the corporate entity and the officers who run it clearly benefits the officers.

(g) Haninozuka Tsukishi (埴之塚 · 月詩), first name meaning 'moon poem'.

(h) Yes, I know Yorihisa-sama just served alcohol to a minor, and said minor accepted the alcohol in an un-minorly way. Does it surprise you? No.

(i) This: "when one sacrifices oneself to help another, it could actually be painful to the person being helped [...]" comes from xxxHOLiC, from the supremely wise Ichihara Yuuko.

(j) This: "knowing too much about other people puts you in their power [...]" comes from Cat's Eye, by Margaret Atwood.

(k) The concept of parents and children revealing things about each other comes from general knowledge and Sherlock Holmes in The Adventure of the Copper Beeches: "My dear Watson, you as a medical man are continually gaining light as to the tendencies of a child by the study of the parents. Don't you see that the converse is equally valid? I have frequently gained my first real insight into the character of parents by studying their children."

(l) "The greatest cunning is to have none at all." – Carl Sandburg.

(m) Let's test your Honey-level knowledge – what makes Tamaki and Kaoru different, and why was Honey reluctant to say anything more about the topic to Kaoru?

Answer: Tamaki always thinks of himself at the centre of his kotatsu. When he pictures happiness, he puts himself at the centre of it – that is the great advantage of his narcissism, that he thinks of himself _as the source or an integral part of other people's happiness._ To Kaoru, however, happiness means having the people he loves be happy – so he imagines _them_ being happy from an angle of him sitting there observing them. It does not occur to him that part of their happiness is due to the fact that he is sitting there. Through his physical eyes, he cannot see himself when he sees that happiness, hence his mind eliminates himself from the picture.

As such, even though we see that Tamaki is capable of a great deal of sacrifice in canon, he wouldn't go to the extremes that Kaoru would. In this respect, he actually has way more self-awareness than Kaoru does – he wouldn't give more than what he can handle, and nothing that is devastatingly irreversible. Tamaki is the sort of fool – "fool" – who wants everyone to live and be together; Kaoru is the sort of fool – real fool, haha – who would give up everything for the people he loves to be happy, even at high personal cost, i.e. giving more than what he can handle.

Honey can't say anything more about it to Kaoru because it is a Catch-22 situation – to end the comparison (by telling his Kao-chan what makes him different from Tamaki), Honey would have to compare them... possibly opening cans and cans of worms, or worse, having Kaoru not believe him and reject it flat out. By which I mean, Kaoru will appear to consider it but his whole heart is basically rebelling against it. Have I mentioned that, of the twins, I think (have always thought) that Kaoru is the more, um, 'difficult' one? Kaoru brought it up with Honey at the end of Chapter 5A. Once Hikaru accepts people into his life, _he accepts people into his life_; there is a wonderful straightforwardness about it. He is honest with them and he stops testing them (he was forthright with Tamaki and Haruhi), whereas Kaoru is always testing people and is chronically dishonest.

I actually think a large part of the twins' self-contradictory nature is down to Kaoru's influence over their relationship, that's why my Kaoru is the one who imitates Hikaru and not the other way around, nor is it a mutual imitation thing. You know, 'which one is Hikaru-kun game' and all that jazz: look at the name of the game, it's as if Kaoru doesn't care to be found, but if a person knows who Hikaru is, then the person will also have found Kaoru isn't it? It's just, Kaoru can't admit to wanting to be found. He wants things but he wants to make you do it. He arranges it so that you can do it, then feels disappointed that you couldn't have done it on your own. Classic passive-aggression, and all signs of searching for someone to match him.

This is why the club is important: all of the club members except one person know (to different degrees) how to shut Kaoru down when he goes into one of those circular, nebulous spirals. Funnily enough, Hikaru is the only one who sucks at it. He can, sometimes, but rarely – in fact he often goes along with Kaoru's plans. Unsurprising, since Kaoru's technique was honed using him. It's very exhausting to be with people like that (passive-aggressive, indirect people) and Kaoru definitely knows it, knows that he's being unrealistically demanding, considering that he does indeed have very high emotional intelligence, that's why he backs off and thinks of himself as a burden, but at the same time he can't help himself and he wants and he hopes... he keeps testing people because he wants to stop testing them. For him to stop testing them, first they must pass all his tests. He really is kind of a mess, and somewhat sadistic-masochistic and his team is going to reflect the different facets of him just as Kyouya's represents him.


	15. Chapter 5E

**CHAPTER FIVE(E)**

**White Team Fight!**

.

"I have to say, I cannot even begin to describe how completely random this is," Kaoru remarks, inspecting his brother's new piercing.

The both of them have sequestered themselves in one of the school lavatories during recess, away from their classmates' eyes.

"Can you explain how I sent you away yesterday in an unspoiled condition only to get back a Hikaru with a navel piercing?" he demands. "Are you trying to up your bad boy allure? Is that it? What's next? Are you going to buy a Kawasaki and wear leather trousers that looks like it's been painted onto your butt?"

Hikaru rolls his eyes as he drops his shirt. "You know you only have to ask if you want to see me riding something in kinky clothing, Kaoru."

"Hikaru," he commands bossily, grabbing his brother's tie playfully and giving it a vampish tug to draw him close, "tell me what naughty things you and Tono were doing yesterday."

"Nothing! Honey-senpai is corrupting you," Hikaru snorts. "We said we'd get a second ear piercing together, didn't we? So I had to find somewhere else on my body – it's not like I could have gotten a nose or eyebrow piercing – remember how the school freaked out on us when we got our ears done until we brought in modeling as an excuse?"

"Why was there a need to find a different location on your body in the first place?" Kaoru smiles pleasantly.

Hikaru shudders. "It's not necessary to channel Kyouya-senpai – I'm not resisting your interrogation, okay? Tono and I were bored."

"Bored."

"Yeah, well, you and Kyouya-senpai were busy! I can't even remember what we were talking about, and one thing led to another, which led to… this," Hikaru says with a sheepish grin.

"This."

"This," Hikaru confirms. "I think – that's right! Tono was asking me why I have red hair again, why I decided to stop dyeing my hair black! I told him it was because you didn't want me to damage my hair – they take enough punishment as it is with the products and heat and constant styling – and we started to brainstorm about other methods to physically differentiate you from me, we came up with lots of ideas and to check things out, we decided to visit the salon."

"Salon."

"Yes, and I made Tono bathe me so that I wouldn't have to move much to prevent water from coming into contact with the piercing. Tono's actually quite competent when you just lie in the bathtub and let him do all the work."

"Work."

"You're sounding a bit retarded, Kaoru."

Kaoru hits him. "You and Tono can't be left alone together, I see that now. Stupid plus stupid equals super stupid – no voice of reason in this combination. You end up doing impulsive things. Next time it'll be something permanent and horrifying, like a tattoo."

"What? It was fun as hell! Besides," Hikaru says cheekily, jutting his hips out towards Kaoru suggestively, "you don't like it?"

Kaoru laughs dryly. "I'll save my response for club tomorrow – I bet we can make at least one girl faint. In fact, I'm going to alter your clothes to show off your belly button, mm, that'll be hot."

"Don't do that! I don't want the school to make me get rid of it! That reminds me – Kyouya-senpai's birthday is a go. Sleepover at our house, straight after club, non-stop till Monday."

"Honey-senpai told me about your idea. Inspired madness."

They exit the restroom to head back to class.

"Isn't it? Bunch of us are gonna set up after school today. You have anything on?"

"Yeah, sorry. Will rush home to help if I can."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

At the final bell, Kaoru and Hikaru quickly stuff their books into their bags, both in a rush to leave.

"Man, Kyouya-senpai's birthday seriously sucks," Hikaru complains. "If our birthday always lands during the exam period, I would have changed the date ages ago."

Before Kaoru can reply, Tamaki swooshes into their classroom dramatically. "Hikaru! Ready when you are!"

Immediately, the girls are a-twitter at the presence of the host club king, but Kaoru senses something different in the air today.

They're looking from Tamaki to Hikaru like they expect something.

… How fast does news travel through the fangirl network?

"What part of 'wait at the foyer' did you not understand, Tono?" Hikaru accepts the last revision worksheets of the day from their class president with a hurried word of thanks. "And how come your class ends earlier than ours? Did you sneak out?"

""What! You're confusing me with yourself, Hikaru! Don't just squish them into your bag like that!" Tamaki objects, taking over from Hikaru. He slots them neatly into Hikaru's file with pomp and circumstance, and Hikaru snaps, "Hey, we have to go to my house! No time to lose!"

"I know you're anxious, Hikaru," Tamaki says patiently, "but I'm staying the night, aren't I?"

Kaoru sees it.

He sees it _oh my god_ he can see the thoughts forming in the girls' heads.

"Yeah, be prepared to get no sleep, Tono."

"Fine, fine, you can order me to do whatever you want," Tamaki says, slinging an arm around Hikaru indulgently.

"Sure? Don't you regret it," Hikaru warns. "I'll make you do it over and over until I'm satisfied."

"Don't worry! I know how much effort you've put into organising this, I'll make sure everything happens the way you imagined it."

"Hikaru," Kaoru cuts in, trying not to implode from smothered laughter, "I'm done, let's go."

Without waiting, he snags his bag with one hand and his brother with the other to haul them along with him.

"Why're you walking so fast, Kaoru?!" Tamaki asks as they glide down the corridor. One of his arms is _still_ wrapped Hikaru, oh, it's migrated to Hikaru's _waist_ because of the speed at which Kaoru is pulling them and the mass of girls is increasing not decreasing at an alarming rate, Renge at the head of the horde.

"Yeah, Kaoru, oy! We don't have to _sprint_!"

"Kaoru, slow down! Hikaru's still sore from yesterday!"

Kaoru sucks in a sharp breath and grinds to a halt in the middle of the grand entrance hall.

Their riveted audience doesn't even try to hide behind walls and pillars any longer.

Hikaru's reaction makes it worse. "Shut up, idiot! Who asked you to shout it out in a public place like this! I told you it doesn't hurt anymore!"

Shiftily, he glances around – there are no teachers in sight, thank god. "I knew you couldn't keep a secret!"

"But!" Tamaki blubbers, peeking at his vast audience timorously, "Kaoru was walking too fast! And – and I thought you'd at least tell him about – you know."

"I give up," Kaoru announces, giving in to hysteria. _I tried to save you two, you don't want to be saved._

"Huh?!" Perplexed, Hikaru glowers at him. "Don't act weird, Kaoru! And you! As if Kaoru will think that he needs to slow down for something like this?! He's done it before, of course he knows it would've stopped hurting already! See what you've done? Everyone knows about it now, are you happy?!"

He stalks off.

Aghast at the unwitting insinuation levelled at him, Kaoru can only laugh heartily and laugh some more.

"K-Kaoru!" Tamaki cries apprehensively, alternately looking at him and Hikaru's retreating back.

"Go after him, Tamaki-sama!" one of their customers call out.

"H-Huh?" Tears pool in Tamaki's helpless eyes.

"You don't want Hikaru-kun to hold a grudge over something like this, Tamaki-sama! It's not worth it!"

"We'll keep it a secret, Tamaki-sama, we promise!"

Everyone eggs him onward. "Yes, Tamaki-sama! Go and apologise and everything will be fine!"

Too winded to talk, Kaoru waves one hand in the direction of the exit in agreement.

Tamaki tears off after Hikaru.

The entire group watches silently as the King flings himself into the Hitachiins' limousine mere seconds before it drives away.

"Kaoru-kun," one of his regulars ventures solicitously, "are you all right?"

He gestures vaguely, hopefully conveying to her an answer in the affirmative.

"I'm sure Hikaru-kun still loves you very much, Kaoru-kun. You have us, too! Please don't be too heartbroken."

Kaoru lapses into another bout of uncontrollable laughter, nods, then shakes his head.

"Poor Kaoru-kun," she says kindly, her hand grazing his arm for an instant before leaving with her friends.

_What the fuck just happened?_ Kaoru thinks dazedly, making his way to the smaller car he'd summoned for the day. _Honey-senpai, what have you done?_

"Hitachiin Kaoru-sama," says the voice of a stranger from a distressingly close distance.

Kaoru swivels around uneasily.

A pair of absurdly glossy opaque sunglasses confronts him, and he takes a step backwards. _Again?!_

"I mean you no harm, Hitachiin Kaoru-sama," intones Sunglasses. He spreads an arm to indicate the car behind him, where a glamorous woman is seated at the back. "Mistress requests that you join her."

Kiyomi gives him a slight smile.

_Shit. Help! Where's Kyouya-senpai when you need him?!_

Mustering his courage, Kaoru presents himself to her and bows. "I'm afraid I'll have to decline, Kiyomi-san. I have to – "

"Oh? Don't tell me Kaoru-kun has to go to the atelier? I rang them, and was informed that you and your brother have been granted leave of absence in view of the final exams," she pre-empts him placidly.

_She's tracking me_, Kaoru realises with dread. _There's no way I can go to Hacker-san's or proceed with today's plans. Kyouya-senpai, where are you?_

" – do my revision," he changes tack at the last minute. "There's plenty more to study, Kiyomi-san."

"Even better!"

Her servant opens the car door on the other side as if to say that he's going with them whether or not he likes it.

"Kaoru-kun is comparatively weaker in the science subjects than the humanities, aren't you? My best subjects at school were chemistry and biology – I always came first in my level. Yuuichi sometimes says that it's a good thing I was in the year beneath him, or he might have disappointed Father! If Kaoru-kun will provide me with expert advice on my dress, I will tutor Kaoru-kun this evening and you can have dinner with us – yes, that sounds lovely."

_No, it sounds fucking terrible. Hotta, where are all of you? Help me!_

"I couldn't possibly take up Kiyomi-san's time," Kaoru says politely. "Surely Kiyomi-san has people who are far more experienced than I am at selecting and creating a dress."

"Your taste is impeccable, Kaoru-kun, do give yourself more credit. You seem jittery, are you looking for Kyouya?" she asks lightly.

"No," Kaoru lies, "it's cold standing here."

"Come into the car, then."

Quashing any sign of reluctance, he complies.

"Turn up the heat," Kiyomi instructs her driver. "I'm glad I happened to catch you before I left, Kaoru-kun. I was here to register my twins for kindergarten for the following year – it's such an exciting time for us at the moment; with any luck, there might be two marriages in the family soon! All four siblings have been summoned back home – Kyouya left as soon as school let out, in case you were wondering where he went."

Her tone is friendly and fluid, yet Kaoru gets a distinct vibe of _'You didn't really think we'd be so careless as to put you in a situation where Kyouya could save you, did you?'_ – that she'd brought it up at all is clearly to show him that he's outmatched.

Resigned to it, Kaoru lets her bring him where she will.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The vendeuse recognises him as a matter of course.

Kaoru doesn't know her personally, only her role – she will be assisting Kiyomi through the couture process. He wriggles his fingers in greeting and sits beside his friend's sister-in-law, thrilled despite himself. He _loves _this collection from Dior.

"You'll be drop-dead gorgeous in this, Kiyomi-san!" he gasps when he sees the gown she has chosen. It's incomplete but he knows what it will be, and she's a really beautiful woman. "Wow!"

Immersing him in fashion is a clever tactic to lower his defences, he knows, and he can feel himself falling for it anyway.

"Thank you," she says delicately, and draws him in further by discussing accessories and shoes and whatnot.

At no point does she raise any topic to cause bells to go off in Kaoru's head, and it's one of the best days he has had in recent times. After the fitting, they end up at a charming little café for tea before going to her house where, true to her word, she proves herself to be a top-notch tutor.

"It's all about the foundation," Kiyomi asserts, annotating his study notes with a green pen. "If you have time, if you can, Kaoru-kun, you'll have to go back and revise the older material. Your foundation for the sciences is quite shaky, piling more new knowledge on is very counterproductive. Do you have someone to work with you one-on-one for these specific areas?"

He nods. "Hikaru and Kyouya-senpai, mostly. Haruhi used to, but she's not here."

"How often?"

"Whenever they're free, I guess."

"That's not enough!" she says, a uniquely Ootori-esque disapproval _dripping_ from her voice. "How will you top your class at this rate?"

"Huh? I don't need to top my class, Kiyomi-san." Kaoru lifts both hands placatingly.

From her expression, there isn't an answer in the universe more wrong than the one he'd given.

"Nonsense."

_Damn Ootoris, why are all of them so competitive?_

"Does Kaoru-kun like being an underachiever? Your humanities and languages are at such a high standard; if you would only brush up on your mathematics and sciences, it is within your reach. Do you lack a quality teacher, is that the reason? In that case, I volunteer."

"No!" Kaoru drops his pen, barely managing to refrain from shouting. _No no no._ "No, thank you, Kiyomi-san. I will – "

"Is it the commoner?" she questions, handing his notebook back to him. "You want to keep her in the school, therefore you refuse to do well?"

"What? No!" he exclaims, offended.

"Wouldn't that mean that right now is the perfect time to strike? The commoner is overseas and will be keeping her scholarship regardless of your results."

Kaoru gawks at her. "It's not like I'm second in class! My class president and vice-president aren't walkovers either!"

"Yet you outrank or match the both of them in English, Japanese, literature and history," she states from memory. "That's half the total number of subjects."

Coldly, Kaoru tells her, "I don't appreciate Kiyomi-san nosing into my affairs."

"It wasn't me, it was Father," she replies casually. "Are you honestly surprised at his interest in your progress? Father places a premium on academic success, this is not news to you, Kaoru-kun. After all, every single one of his four children, his daughter-in-law and his son-in-law all topped their – our – levels."

_You've_ got _to be kidding me._

"Pardon me," he grits out, "I hadn't known Ootori-sama was in the market for a son-in-law for his unmarried _sons_, much less that I am listed as a candidate."

"Don't be silly, Kaoru-kun," she smiles in amusement. "The ludicrousness of Father countenancing a male partner for Kyouya aside, Tamaki-kun is a better choice than you."

Oh, _bitch_.

"Then I confess I can't see the relevance of my marks to your family."

"We are who we spend time with, Kaoru-kun," Kiyomi explains, "and so long as there is a modicum of choice in the decision about who to spend that time with, that will necessarily reveal something about the person who made the choice. Although our marriages were arranged, Yuuichi had a hand in making me his wife, and Fuyumi picked her husband out of a couple of men that Father deemed to be suitable, valuable partners – you see, then, that because Kyouya's future wife is a foreigner, the accurate criteria with which to judge her is that of a foreign system. As such, you and your friends – people in the _same_ system – form the primary guide to Kyouya's choices."

She taps his textbook with an immaculately manicured hand. "Leadership, Kaoru-kun, is about people management. It is about the ability to identify and groom the right people for the right task; it is about self-awareness and delegation. As humans, when we select companions, romantic or subordinate or otherwise, we often base our choices on several factors: one, similarity to ourselves – it is easier to get along with people who subscribe to the same ideals or methods of doing things. Two, _dis_similarity to ourselves – in order to compensate for our shortcomings, we gravitate towards those who have qualities that we admire but we ourselves do not possess, for them to do what we cannot do. In Kyouya's life, you are the first and only person that he has picked entirely by himself – not even Tamaki-kun shares this distinction – can you not understand why Father would focus on you?"

Kaoru stares at her with wide eyes; inside, he is freaking out – she is right about everything, how did he never see it from this perspective?

"Taking that train of thought to its conclusion, what do you think Father will infer from the fact that you do not top your class in a school system that has been thoroughly conquered by all of his children? What should he think about your lack of urgency to excel? How should he regard Kyouya's investment in you?"

"I – I don't – !"

He can't even finish, gripping the table tightly to arrest his downward slide into panic.

She sighs, maternal and benevolent.

"Let me help you, Kaoru-kun, all right?" she requests, replacing the pen in his white-knuckled hand and patting his head compassionately. "Come on, question 15 – is this a covalent bond or an ionic bond?"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The children run to their father when he steps through the front door.

Yuuichi gathers his daughter into his arms and permits his son to cling to his leg as he strides forward to where Kaoru is seated with his wife, with books and papers scattered all around them.

"Hello, darling!" Kiyomi makes room for him to sit. "I was just going through practice papers with Kaoru-kun. Kaoru-kun's literature essays are marvellous, do you want to read them? So detailed and insightful!"

"Ah, it – it's nothing much!"

Kaoru attempts to get them back, and Yuuichi says, "Don't be shy, Kaoru-kun. In our family, we're always fascinated by other people's opinions, especially well-considered ones."

That came across in a manner too ominous for comfort. Yuuichi settles down to read the contents of the folder and Kiyomi recaptures his attention with the chemistry paper. "Check this equation again, Kaoru-kun."

They spare him for another half an hour, then Yuuichi calls his name, holding out the folder.

"There was no new interpretation in that essay, was there?" he says ponderously. "I was more intrigued by the stance adopted by Tamaki-kun in relation to the main character's motivations. His essay last year was eye-opening."

_Don't think I don't know what you're doing, jerkass._

"Tono can't help but transfer some of his wackiness into his work," Kaoru says dully, not rising to the bait.

Slowly, Yuuichi blinks once at him with a hint of a smile. "Are you hungry, Kaoru-kun?"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

" – trying for a child," Yuuichi says conversationally, in between bites of food, "and I said to her that Kiyomi and I are still occasionally caught off guard by the amount of work that goes into child-rearing. Good nannies are hard to find – even harder when we have twins who refuse to have separate nannies. Did you insist on having the same nanny as your brother, too?"

Kaoru grins. "Yes, actually. Have your children made any of their nannies cry or run away partially crazed? If not, Yuuichi-san and Kiyomi-san, count your blessings."

"They haven't, thank goodness," Kiyomi chuckles, "unlike the legendary twin terrors of the Hitachiins. Who knows how many people have been permanently scarred by the experience, Kaoru-kun? Perhaps_ you _are the root cause behind the dearth of nannies willing to accept a commission of caring for twins!"

"Maybe," Kaoru snorts. "I'm sorry for the inconvenience caused, I guess."

"Fuyumi is unlikely to have twins," Kiyomi observes. Half-jokingly, she adds, "Lucky her."

"Yeah, my mother says that, in hindsight, having twins as her 'first child' was too much of a crash course – it's bad enough having to learn to care for one baby, and all that," Kaoru says. "It might be fun for your children to have cousins."

"Yes, but I can tell that Fuyumi is feeling conflicted – she wants to look beautiful in Akito's and Kyouya's wedding photos."

Both Kiyomi and Kaoru laugh at that; Kaoru's is a tad strained.

"Has it all been decided, darling?"

Yuuichi cuts a glance towards Kaoru before answering his wife. "Yes."

Composedly, Kaoru continues eating his dinner.

"And you, dear? Have you arranged everything with the school?"

"Yes," Kiyomi says, pleased. "Don't you want to know who it is, Kaoru-kun?"

… They're going to make him ask. Why must they be cruel over something so small?

"I suppose," Kaoru replies with a broad smile.

"Akito will be marrying an Australian mining heiress," Yuuichi informs him, "and Kyouya will be marrying someone with whom you are also acquainted, Kaoru-kun."

"Really? Who?" Kaoru plays along.

"Princess Michelle," Kiyomi fills in, and Kaoru reacts with the requisite shock and et cetera, et cetera. "The brave child made up her mind to commit herself to her elder brother's policy – for the sake of her country, she was prepared to cease her schooling at the Institut Le Rosey at the end of this year to attend a lesser local school."

"Which simply won't do for a person of her status," Yuuichi tuts, shaking his head. "Her education and safety would be compromised at these commoners' schools. That's why, Kaoru-kun, you will be reunited with an old friend before long."

It takes minutes for Kaoru to grasp the implications of what they're saying.

"You – you mean… she's coming here?" he gasps. "Ouran?"

"Yes, and we will undertake to pay the costs of her education as she is now one of us. Darling, tell Father that I will finalise her enrolment tomorrow – the academy has expressed their delight at having her as a student, and she will be placed in Kaoru-kun's class as she was the previous time."

"Of course, I expected no less of the school," Yuuichi says. "It's twice as fortunate that Kyouya has unequivocally nominated you as president, Kaoru-kun; when Princess Michelle arrives and we announce the engagement, Kyouya will be severing all ties with your club."

_What?_

"Indeed, it would be grossly inappropriate for Kyouya to flirt with his schoolmates! I can't believe Father hasn't asked him to quit immediately – oh, darling, Father does spoil Kyouya, doesn't he? The youngest of a family always enjoys certain privileges."

"Isn't it? Father has been most soft-hearted. Kaoru-kun is the youngest, too – tell us, Kaoru-kun, as we are both the oldest of our siblings, what is the secret to gaining parental favour?"

Stupefied and uncomprehending, Kaoru looks at them mutely.

"Kaoru-kun?" Kiyomi prompts, bewildered on the surface and sly at the core.

"U-Uhm, there is no secret," he manages.

They laugh. "Oh no! Yuuichi, darling, it must be something that defies imitation!"

"Part of their biological makeup, no doubt."

"Yes! To think, we had to wait a year to be married!"

"No, we aren't favoured by our parents!" Kaoru corrects, finding his tongue. "There is no secret, parents just do what they like! Isn't Ootori-sama a fair man?"

"He dotes on Kyouya," Yuuichi asserts impassively.

"R-Really…?"

"Yes, and so did my mother," Yuuichi says, humour in his tone.

Kaoru feels a spike of gut-churning fear, instinctively sensing that he is stepping into very dangerous waters, with an undercurrent that is scalding hot and lethally fast to drag him out and drown him – he's completely out of his depth, they wield all of the power, and nobody knows he's here.

His hands have gone numb and icy; he's actually scared.

At a loss, he keeps his gaze down and says no more.

Yuuichi and Kiyomi torment him with the absolute silence, clearing their plates nonchalantly.

Kaoru breaks.

He'd known he would, and they'd known, too.

"I'm sorry," he stammers, scarcely above a whisper. "I-I don't know anything about Yuuichi-san's family and I can't say anything about it, not even to contradict you or make you feel better, but I genuinely liked Yuuichi-san and Kiyomi-san, and – and I still do, just now, when you were helping me with my studies, I… I really liked that… I'm grateful."

Despite Kiyomi being the one to tutor him, Yuuichi is the one who speaks. "Is that so."

And Kaoru gets it.

He _gets it_. "Yes. Maturity allows a person to see and understand more… _remember_ more. There must be countless things that Yuuichi-san as the elder brother saw and understood that your younger siblings could not, and carrying the weight of those memories alone must be unbearable. Even now, Yuuichi-san, Kiyomi-san and Fuyumi-san are still doing things for your younger siblings… I'm sorry, so sorry – "

– _that your father is encouraging this competition and forcing you into a game that you didn't want to play – _

– _that Kyouya-senpai wants to take your inheritance away from you, it must be like throwing your kindness back in your face – _

– _that I'm helping Kyouya-senpai even though I have no fucking right to do this to your family – _

– _that no one sees you as human beings who have feelings – _

" – that Yuuichi-san has to bear this burden, but maybe this is the privilege of being the oldest? Maybe it is the opportunity to store precious memories in your heart that other people don't have and can't have. Maybe it is that knowledge, that _certain truth_ that your siblings once loved you, wholehearted, uncomplicated and unconditional, even if you can't remember a time when you loved them the same way. Maybe it is the frozen image of the radiance in their cute kiddy faces when they saw you, even as your heart plummeted at the thought of what your kinship would become as they grew up. Maybe this is the payment for your pains, Yuuichi-san?"

Astonished, the two Ootoris bore a hole in him with their penetrating eyes.

Kaoru smiles for real. "For what it's worth, I like you, Yuuichi-san, and you too, Kiyomi-san. To me, Yuuichi-san is an outstanding Ootori heir, and you would make a phenomenal head of your household."

_I think you needed to hear that, I think you needed someone on Kyouya-senpai's side to acknowledge that irrespective of the outcome._

The dining hall is suspended in noiselessness again.

Yuuichi and Kiyomi exchange a look – one of those confidential spousal communications.

"Hmm," Yuuichi says mildly.

"Would you care for dessert, Kaoru-kun?" Kiyomi asks, equally mildly.

"No, thank you… I told my brother I'd lend a hand for some things tonight, and it's quite late already," he turns them down courteously.

"Is it for Kyouya's birthday party?"

"Ah… yeah."

Kiyomi cocks an elegant eyebrow. "I hope you've planned something exceptional, Kaoru-kun. There's only so much time left for you and your friends to be young and irresponsible."

'I'll keep that in mind, Kiyomi-san," Kaoru assures her, "but not to worry – when Princess Michelle comes here, she will find a fiancé with his reputation intact."

"When she comes here?" Kiyomi asks quizzically. "No, I was not referring to that. Kyouya has a few months before he is officially spoken for."

Horrified, Kaoru repeats, "_Months?_"

"My little brother is going to America for university and Princess Michelle has long targeted the Ivies as well – they will be married before he leaves and she will join him after she graduates from Ouran. We can't let him run wild in a foreign country alone, now, can we? As a Duke and a member of the Royal Family of Monale, their citizens and the European or even the global media will keep an eye on him, keep him in line, which my brother can convert to his advantage by doing all the right things."

"Why – when is the wedding?!"

"In approximately five or six months."

_No._

_No…!_

"Why are you so shocked, Kaoru-kun? You've lost all colour."

"I'm fine!" Kaoru denies. "I'm fine."

"Has it been a long day? Shall we postpone our revision to a later date?"

"That's not – "

"Now, Kaoru-kun," Kiyomi urges him to his feet and steers him out, "don't forget what I said. Really, it's such a boost to your self-esteem to do well in exams, my only concern is that you will become addicted to that feeling! Let's schedule more lessons after Kyouya's birthday, yes?"

"Kiyomi-san, I – "

He is pushed into the car and the door is shut on him.

Kaoru growls quietly in angst, stabbing the button to bring the window down. "Kiyomi-san, there's no need!"

"Kaoru-kun," she says, leaning into the car with an arm resting on the bottom of the window frame, "thank you for saying what you did to my darling. Your tuition is a small expression of my thanks, please don't refuse me."

He knows better than to trust her.

"… Okay."

"Excellent!" She steps back from the vehicle and collects her daughter, who waves primly at Kaoru at the behest of her mother.

"We'll see you then, Kaoru-kun," Yuuichi says in farewell, carrying his sleepy son into the house.

The car rolls out of the grounds, disappearing into the black of the night.

Amidst the encroaching chill as autumn dies, the lady of the mansion watches as the taillights fade in the distance. Several strands of lustrous hair swish in the wind, having escaped the confines of a sophisticated French twist; as with everything about this woman, all the flaws merely add up to a total of perfection.

"Kiyomi."

She ascends the stairs, heeding her husband's call. The heavy double doors close behind her, enveloping her in warmth.

"How was it?" She passes her child to her new servant, a 'personal attendant' waiting in the wings – how she'd combed the world for a nanny with prior experience caring for twins. "Is he as you remember him?"

"So this is Kaoru-chan," the nanny replies nostalgically. "He's grown up! I thought he'd stay the same as Hikaru-chan forever, but the differences are so pronounced I can hardly believe it."

"Will that hamper your ability to size him up and anticipate his movements?"

"Yuuichi-sama," the nanny says with a note of characteristic irreverence, "I told you he'd hire my sister if you could only bring her to his attention, didn't I? Looking at him just now, he's still the child who likes listening to stories and loves too intensely for his own good."

"Ensure that you come to grips with Kaoru-kun's development over the past decade," Kiyomi reminds her with a glimmer of steel. "There is no room for negligent errors, unless you wish to find yourself back in Ukraine."

Almost imperceptibly, the nanny swallows once as though to moisten her throat. "Yes, Kiyomi-sama. With their combined skill and innate curiosity, plus the position of trust that Kaoru-chan is in, he and my sister will definitely be able to dredge up Yuuichi-sama's brother's hidden activities, and at that point Yuuichi-sama and Kiyomi-sama can play your trump card to secure my sister's defection."

"All right, we'll see how it unfolds," Yuuichi nods. "You are to be ever vigilant – neither your sister nor Kaoru-kun can know about you until such time as is right."

"Yes, Yuuichi-sama."

Kiyomi leaves with her husband, away from the bowing servants. When they are alone, she slips her hand in his.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

At the gate, Kaoru says to the driver, "Here will do."

His head is pounding; for the first time in his life, he doesn't want to go to Hikaru.

Sticking to the shadows of the big trees in the front garden, he strolls to the rose trellis and crouches down to sit on the grass underneath the starry skies, inhaling deeply to ease the aching buzz.

His breath mists into cloudlike puffs when he laughs to himself.

_God, I can hear them. How loud are they?_

" – ruuuuuuuu!"

It's not a full moon – that must have been Tamaki and not a werewolf.

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

"Takashi, Tama-chan's falling off the ladder!"

"Tonooooo!"

An almighty crash is heard.

Kaoru drops his head atop his knees and absorbs the sounds of their joy, engraving them into his heart.

In a while, he will go in.

Just a while more.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) While I definitely think that the twins are very very very pretty with their fashion sense and their talent for accessorising, Hikaru and Kaoru do actually have piercings in canon, and they do wear earrings (Volume 18 extras, the picture with Ageha). They are drawn as university/college age in those extras, so perhaps they obtained their ear piercings when they went off to art school – because Japanese primary, secondary and high schools are quite strict about uniforms (especially the prestigious ones) so they may not have had them in Ouran. At any rate, it feels like something that a Hitachiin would normally have, and it would come in handy for their modelling too.

(b) The job of a 'vendeuse' in haute couture is a very important one – she is the person who assists the client all throughout the couture process, from initial to final fitting. The level of attention and personal service is second to none, as can be expected when the client is going to spend a mini fortune on the clothing. Haute couture averages from the lower-mid range of 5 digits for something like a (comparatively) simple blouse; usually it falls within high 5 digit all the way to the entire spectrum of 6 digits, and complex gowns go into the 7 digits. US dollars or Euro, not Yen. The vendeuse has to tackle any difficulties that arise, such as another client requesting the same dress (in case two women wear the same garment to the same event – _disaster_, obviously), and she is also the one who liaises between the stockroom, embroiderers, furriers and client. The male version is "vendeur", but to be honest it's always a vendeuse – the vendeuse is present for all fittings and adjustments, and you understand that having a man paw these rich women is gonna cause some problems.

The fact the the vendeuse comes to Kiyomi indicates that she is a regular, long-standing "serious" purchaser.

(c) Kaoru is canonically ranked 4th in his class, behind 1) Fujioka Haruhi, 2) Soga Kazukiyo (class president), 3) Kurakano Momoka (vice-class president). Hikaru is ranked 5th. See: Chapter 17 and Chapter 25 page 19.

(d) Kiyomi is calling Yoshio 'Father' because in Asian cultures, the parents of one's spouse becomes one's parents and are addressed as such. You see this in the Hitachiin Family Precepts chapter as well, that the twins' father calls Yuzuha's parents 'Mum' and 'Dad'. They are never addressed by name (the horror), and rarely they may be called by 'father-in-law'/'mother-in-law'. The spouses of one's elder siblings also becomes one's elder siblings – hence Kyouya will address Kiyomi as Kiyomi-neesan as well, or he will use the term 'sister-in-law'. Asian languages are fun like that.

(e) The Institut Le Rosey, or the 'School of Kings' is located in Switzerland and used to be the most expensive school in the world until it was overtaken by the Collège Alpin International Beau Soleil (also in Switzerland) as of 2011, however its heritage still distinguishes it from other schools. Many monarchies and the super rich and famous send their children and heirs there. Its annual tuition fee is about US$106,000 excluding miscellaneous costs and services both mandatory and optional, with a waiting list that makes entrance super difficult (minimum of 2 years) and an alumni list that reads like Who's Who.

In other words, Rosey is the European Ouran. Damn, should have just explained it like this from the start.

(f) Sorry about the messiness of the recent chapters. I'm trialling the new shorter chapters = more updates thing, and I'm having a hard time working it out. Sorry, it's terrible I know. The website won't let me use the same name for different chapters, otherwise I'd just name them all "Chapter 5" and be done with it.

.

_Next Chapter:_

_6. The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!_


	16. Chapter 6A

**CHAPTER SIX**

**The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!**

.

Kaoru sits on the parapet with a physics textbook in his lap, swinging his legs idly.

Every now and then, a classmate or customer will call out to him, Hikaru and/or Tamaki on their way to their classrooms to begin the new school day. The three of them are loitering in the vicinity of the car porch before roll call – Hikaru and Tamaki are occupying each other's attention wonderfully, teasing and fighting like they've been doing the whole night.

They slept in the same bed.

They insisted.

It's not like anyone objected, you know. He and Honey wanted to share a bed, and Mori would have been happy anywhere.

How should Kaoru utilise this knowledge? How wrong would it be for him to fan the flames of moe for kicks?

What the hell, but Kaoru thinks he's being warped by the fangirls. Why else is his brain plying him with subtext and innuendo? Yesterday, _the way they behaved_! After their bath, the twins attempted to trick Tamaki by switching identities, and Tamaki correctly seized Hikaru and was all smooth like, "I'm a lot better at differentiating between you two devils than you think, Hikaru! If I slip up sometimes, it's only because you do in fact have moments where you _are_ alike!" and Hikaru had wriggled out of his embrace and Tamaki had given chase and they'd laughed and laughed.

Oh, perhaps Kaoru should have mentioned that he'd returned home to find Tamaki carrying Hikaru. Apparently Hikaru had thought that Tamaki should be compelled to piggyback him around as penance, or at least to prop Hikaru up in order for him to reach the higher areas. Somewhere around midnight, Tamaki had crawled under the covers for his beauty sleep and Hikaru had pounced on him to rib him about his lack of stamina, for which Tamaki had wrestled Hikaru to the sheets and bundled him up in the blankets to launch a sustained tickle attack, and Hikaru had gasped and squealed breathlessly and –

Anyway, they'd woken Honey up, and proceeded to spend the next hour shivering in each other's arms as a result of that traumatic incident. Needless to say, Mori and Kaoru finished up and went to bed, and with them acting as buffers against the low blood pressure occupant on the far right, Hikaru and Tamaki had crept back into the room to squeeze themselves in at Mori's left – the beds had been pushed together.

How will they survive having Kyouya and Honey in the same room for three nights, Kaoru has to wonder. He himself is practically a seasoned veteran by now – fine, not quite, but he understands the basic principle of sleeping with either of them: don't. be. annoying.

"Kaoru, why're you so quiet?" Tamaki plops himself down beside him, ruffling his hair.

"Jealous," Kaoru tells him, "of the way you've been lavishing all your love on Hikaru."

It produces the most spectacular reaction.

"Whaaaat!"

"No, I love you too, Kaoru!" Tamaki crushes him to himself. "Have I been ignoring you?! I'm so sorry! How could I?! What can I do to make up for it?!"

"Oof! Tono, you're killing me!" Kaoru yells.

"Kaoru! Tono, you monster, let go!"

"No! I've let Kaoru down! Hikaru, we've been neglecting Kaoru! We should have asked him if he wanted to sleep with us last night!" Tamaki wails. "This is unforgivable!"

"As if! You take up so much space, we wouldn't manage to fit – you see this purple patch here? You kicked me and I just didn't say anything out of the goodness of my heart!"

"Ahhh! What!" Tamaki grabs Hikaru to peer at his torso. "You also moved around a lot!"

"Not as much as you!"

"You kept stealing the blankets! I was freezing!"

"Hah?! You woke me up at some ungodly hour!"

"That's the normal time I wake up!"

… And off they go again. I love you, I hate you, I love that I hate you, I hate that I love you. It's like a French movie.

There's something seriously wrong with Kaoru, or something's changed between his brother and Tamaki. Their relationship seems to have deepened – there's a camaraderie there based on their feelings for Haruhi, of all things, like they've both come to accept that the other person would be the best partner for Haruhi if for some reason either of them could not be with her.

Hikaru had to accept that, of course, but Tamaki didn't have to – maybe it is that concession that struck the right chord with Hikaru? They really are coping miraculously; there is so much generosity of spirit, care and respect; their bickering is at once superficial and not – the words have no sting, and are nothing less than a proud declaration of familiarity and affection.

"Of all the sights I could have encountered upon stepping foot into the school building," says a cool voice, "it is the two of you squabbling like pre-schoolers."

"Kyouya-senpai!" Hikaru appeals to him, deliberately pathetic, "look what Tono did to me!"

"That wasn't me!" Tamaki cries. "Kyouya, it wasn't me! Hikaru knocked into a table when he lost his balance!"

"Tono almost squashed me in my sleep, Kyouya-senpai!"

"Hikaru snatched all the pillows!"

"Tono tried to drown me in the bath!"

"Hikaru's been bullying me since yesterday afternoon!"

Kyouya sighs. "Tamaki, do you recall your decree regarding the conduct of club members outside of club times? Championing the club, not being a disgrace and so on and so forth?"

"But," Tamaki weeps, "Hikaru is mean and Kaoru is sad!"

Kyouya looks over at Kaoru.

"Aside from being blatantly untrue," Kaoru says, standing up and going to their despondent president, "that made no sense at all, Tono, even if Hikaru is mean."

Hikaru makes to thwack him with a bag; Kaoru ducks, and the blow lands on Tamaki.

Tamaki springs up at once. "Hikaru!"

"You should have dodged, idiot!" Hikaru shouts as he flees.

"Come back here!"

They flirt all the way to the – sorry, they race all the way to the clubroom with Kyouya and Kaoru bringing up the rear leisurely, the bag (weapon) in Kaoru's hands. Its contents – accessories for today's cosplay – are thankfully unharmed.

"This is such an amazing cosplay," Hikaru breathes when they are ensconced within. "Kaoru, you are a _genius_."

Kaoru smiles, laying out the outfits by person to avoid confusion later on.

_Goggles, check. Waistcoats, check. Top hats, belts, chains…_

"How come Mori-senpai gets the hottest outfit?" Hikaru uses a cloth to polish the metal timepieces and decorative gears.

Nonplussed, Kaoru says, "I asked you who has the fittest body out of all of us, and you said Mori-senpai."

"So much skin," Kyouya remarks. "You want the girls to expire on the spot?"

"It's not that much once it all layers on! Besides, Mori-senpai's _arms_."

"Shouldn't be covered up," Hikaru agrees. "And senpai has the height. Yeah, it has to be him – Tono has chicken arms."

"Huh?!" Tamaki demands indignantly, head snapping up from his inspection of the machinery that forms the set. "I can pull this off too!"

"Nuh."

"What! I'll show you!"

"Touch my costumes and you die!" Kaoru threatens. "If you want Hikaru to admire your body, do it elsewhere!"

"Who wants to admire something like that?!"

"What do you mean, 'something like that'?! I could've been crafted by Michelangelo!"

Kaoru claps his hands over his ears to block out the sounds of Round… 26? 27?

"That looks like a long-suffering expression," Kyouya chuckles, shutting the door to the side room behind him.

"Senpai!" Kaoru exclaims, horrified. "Keep the door open! If they're going to wreck the main room, I want to know about it!"

"If they're going to wreck the main room," Kyouya says reasonably, "nothing you can do will stop them. Kaoru, I have something to discuss with you."

_Oh, no._

"Yeah?" Kaoru turns his back on his senior to rifle in the wardrobe, keeping his posture relaxed.

"Yes. This December I intend to go to the US, spanning the seasonal holidays from Christmas to the New Year, returning only a day before the beginning of the third trimester," Kyouya says without preamble. "You wanted to come along, didn't you? Can you arrange for all of us to go together and to meet up with Haruhi? It will be her school vacation, too."

Surprised, Kaoru blinks at him. "Eh?"

_Aren't you going to tell me you're quitting the club?_

Then it hits him: Kyouya's asking to spend time with them.

"Sure," Kaoru says, relieved that his voice doesn't tremble. "Leave it to me."

… Wow, he'd thought it couldn't hurt more. His heart feels cracked into itty-bitty pieces.

"Good," Kyouya smiles faintly. "Don't make it a club event – we're going as friends on holidays, like the Karuizawa trip, understand? Considering that we haven't seen Haruhi in a while, we don't want the customers to get in the way, however well-intentioned they might be."

"Yeah," Kaoru struggles to say, and quickly buries his head in the cabinet that stores the hair accessories and products. He closes his eyes briefly, and continues, "Senpai, the second year school trip…"

_And Princess Michelle will be in my class…_

"Yes, that. Haruhi's popularity means that the outcome of the vote is a foregone conclusion. We should be home by the second week of January and the second year trip typically occurs in late January, no?"

"No," Kaoru corrects him regretfully, clutching a box of pins, "a significant proportion of my year level is pushing for the trip to be brought forward, sacrificing their school vacation for the opportunity to spend New Year's Day with Haruhi – they don't want her to be lonely."

Kyouya goes silent.

_Why? Why has everything turned out this way?_

"Could you work your way around that? Make it so that our itinerary allows us to evade our schoolmates?"

"I – I could try," Kaoru replies doubtfully, even as he knows it can't be done. The second years are going to the US precisely to meet with Haruhi, and Kyouya needs to stop over at Massachusetts and Connecticut and whatever – "A few days might be possible, probably one or two days tops."

Kyouya nods. "Do it."

Suddenly, Kaoru feels like he just wants Kyouya to come out with the truth, because it is _awful_ to watch him do this.

He doesn't want to hear it but he has to ask, "Anything else, Kyouya-senpai?"

"No." Kyouya flips through his black notebook, peeling off a post-it and throwing it in the bin. "You've been doing well, Kaoru, keep it up. At this rate, I can hand the club over to you far earlier than expected."

"I don't want it!"

Taken aback, Kyouya stares at him.

"Not yet," Kaoru qualifies. "I don't – "

The door is flung open and two concerned faces peek in.

"What's up? Why were you shouting, Kaoru?"

"Why are the both of you sneaking around in here like you're having an illicit affair?"

Kaoru waits for Kyouya to make a tart response…

… and Kyouya had been waiting for him to rebut his brother.

Neither of them says a word. _Shit._

"You're one to talk, Hikaru!" Kaoru snaps with more heat than is warranted, unable to regulate it due to his worry. "You've been groping Tono all day!"

"What's got you in a twist?" Hikaru comes right back at him, and Tamaki restrains him.

"Don't fight," he orders in his kingliest voice. "What's going on, Kyouya?"

In turn, Kyouya directs a questioning gaze to Kaoru.

"Nothing," Kaoru says, placing each shoebox underneath its corresponding outfit. "Nothing, I'm not feeling well. I'm sorry for being rude, Kyouya-senpai. Sorry, Hikaru."

Somebody grasps his wrist.

"Look at me."

Those eyes, they are so much like Ootori-sama's and Yuuichi's.

Tamaki's musician fingers brush back Kaoru's fringe; his palm presses against Kaoru's forehead. "Do you need to go to the infirmary?"

Kaoru shakes his head.

"Don't be like that," Hikaru says flatly.

"I'm fine, just tired," Kaoru grins, "but that's not going to be a problem for long, is it?"

Hikaru snorts.

Tamaki and Kyouya don't let it go as easily.

"You know what would be cool, Kyouya-senpai? A visual kei cosplay," Kaoru says whimsically, giving his hand an experimental tug; Kyouya does not release him. "The bands suck but the costuming is gorgeous. I can really flex my skills and Tono can be even flashier than usual."

"Kaoru – "

"Can you guys help, please? Tono, get that box of gloves for me – I have to get this done now, 'cos I have food to sort out before we open our doors. The themed cake's going to be awesome, I hope Honey-senpai likes it."

Obligingly, Tamaki reaches for the box and goes straight back to cornering him.

"Oh, yeah, what're we going to do about the email yesterday?" Kaoru asks. "I know you both received it as well – hey, Tono, did you check your inbox last night?"

"What email?"

_Thank god for Hikaru._

"From the Department Head of Clubs and Societies. She said we have less than the bare minimum number of members needed for a club and students have filed complaints against us for being too exclusive and elitist."

"What, are you serious? _Elitist? _Can any Ouran student accuse someone of being that without coming across as a total dickhead? They just wanna force us to recruit so they can be part of us, don't they?"

"Don't we have five members?" Tamaki inquires.

"As Haruhi's membership is suspended during her stay in Boston, she isn't an active member," Kyouya explains, still persisting in his determination to cross-examine Kaoru. "The rules specify five active members per club – to be frank, I'm surprised we've gotten away with it thus far… and that in itself may have contributed to the envy felt towards the club."

Hikaru puts up his hand. "I nominate Morinozuka Satoshi and Haninozuka Yasuchika. All in favour?"

Kaoru cheers, and Kyouya smirks a little.

"We will ask Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai to persuade their brothers!" Tamaki declares.

"There's a _slight_ complication," Kyouya cautions. "As a penalty for breaching the rules, we are now required to hold open interviews."

Appalled, Hikaru yelps, "No way!"

"Yes, I remember reading something like that when we signed it," says Tamaki. "Isn't it because clubs generally have insufficient members due to a lack of interest? Open interviews is beneficial to them and might actually save their clubs."

"I don't want to deal with sleazy riffraff! What a nightmare!"

"Kyouya, you let it get to this stage?"

Frostily, Kyouya says, "_You're_ the president."

"But! You knew!"

"It was obvious that nobody was keen on new members," Kyouya says wryly, "and I knew your father was consciously shelving the issue in board and staff meetings in a bid to delay any debate about it. I should warn you, Yasuchika is immensely opposed to the idea."

"Get Satoshi to change his mind," Hikaru suggests.

Kaoru frowns. "That's barbaric, Hikaru. What do you want Satoshi to do, pummel Chika into submission? Honey-senpai cries everytime Chika gets beaten up – can you bear to make Honey-senpai cry?"

"Then what?" Hikaru huffs. "Build a guinea pig pen? Mori-senpai says that Yasuchika only has a weakness for cute animals, not cakes or stuffed toys or female attention. Anyway, what the hell is he supposed to be?"

Kaoru shrugs. "Tono?"

"… Gothic Loli?"

The three of them conjure up the image in their heads – and burst into laughter.

"Regardless," Kyouya interrupts amusedly, "we should aim to enlist more members, preferably more than two – there's no need for us to hover at the borderline, and Tamaki and I may become unavailable. This decision should be largely left to Kaoru and Hikaru, do you think, Tamaki?"

Kaoru catches the reference and in Tamaki's spirited nod, he deduces that Tamaki is unaware – it all clicks: Kyouya can't bring himself to smash their happiness, so he does what he's best at, manoeuvring them into a position where he believes they can better fend for themselves. If the Chairman had been assisting their cause in keeping their numbers small, then why the email at this point of time? Kyouya must have conferenced with Tamaki's father, requested that he conceal the news of Princess Michelle's enrolment from his son and proposed that this method be used to mobilise the club into beginning the drafting process.

Meanwhile, with them in the dark, Kyouya carries on as usual.

_This guy… _

It makes Kaoru so _angry_.

For this one birthday, at least, Kaoru wants to make it special if he can't stop Kyouya from leaving the host club.

The bell rings, signalling to them that they should be heading for their morning class meetings to mark their attendance before lessons start.

"Kaoru," Kyouya says sternly, latching onto his arm to prevent his escape.

"Senpai," Kaoru answers, with a sweetness that is guaranteed effective against Honey.

"That doesn't work on me."

Kaoru smiles at him, feeling warm and melty. _Can you really afford to care about me when you have so many things on your mind?_

"Are you having problems? Tell me."

_Oh, I –_

Carefully, almost uncertainly, Kaoru takes a nimble step forward and wraps his arms around Kyouya's neck.

His senior goes taut with shock.

There's something indefinably pure about this hug, gentle and childlike with the floaty lightness of fresh fallen snow.

Kaoru forgets how to pull away. He himself is shocked; he's never actually purposefully hugged Kyouya before – searching his memory, there isn't a time where Kyouya has ever held someone or been held so closely – Tamaki, maybe?

"Wha – " Hikaru trails off.

Feeling an indistinguishable blend of peace and terror, Kaoru untangles himself and draws back. For a fleeting moment, Kyouya's eyes are completely unguarded and Kaoru gazes back, transfixed.

_It will be fine_, he wishes.

With another irrepressibly soft smile, he swipes his bag off the table and exits with Hikaru.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Somewhere behind Kaoru, Hikaru is giving off that vibe whereby he desperately wants to say something but doesn't know what to say.

"Kaoru-sama!"

Even though they have to get to their classroom, many girls are still stopping him along the way – since he became president apparent, half of them have upgraded him to a '-sama' and it's like everyone takes it for granted that he will do these collateral duties that Tamaki enjoys and Kyouya performs in the name of customer relations.

"Hi, see you in club this afternoon!"

"Kaoru-sama, better hurry to class!"

"Yes, you too!"

One of his patrons runs up to him. "Kaoru-kun, will there be any events during the school holidays?"

"I'm sorry, I'm afraid not. Another time?"

"Pity! My childhood friend is visiting from Belgium, and I wanted to bring her along – in our letters, she always asks me what a 'host club' is, and I describe all of our activities to her but it's so difficult to explain – when I told her about our singing competition, she thought we were a choir!"

"Is that so," Kaoru laughs. "With the broad range of things we do, we're a club of clubs. The name is – "

_Misleading._

_Just a name._

_Oh my god. _

"What, what?" Hikaru demands anxiously.

"Kaoru-kun?"

He can't stop Kyouya from leaving the _host_ club, but he might be able to stop Kyouya from leaving _their club_.

"Oi Kaoru are you okay don't scare me!"

"Go to class, Hikaru." Kaoru pushes his bag into Hikaru's arms unceremoniously. "I'll catch up with you, go!"

He flies off in the opposite direction.

"Kaoru!" Hikaru tries to follow.

"_No!_" Kaoru yells, not slowing down. "I'm all right! Trust me, please! See you in class!"


	17. Chapter 6B

**CHAPTER SIX**

**The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!**

.

Down three flights of stairs and into a secluded room, Kaoru whips his phone out to make three calls in succession.

"Mother? Yeah, it's Kaoru. I need help! Could you…"

"Anne-Sophie-sama? Yes, this is Kaoru. I wonder if I could ask you for a favour…"

"Tsukishi-sama? Yes, this is Kaoru, how do you do? Is this a convenient time…? Well, you see…"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"You shouldn't be out of class, Hitachiin-kun; the first lesson has already begun."

"Please, it's a crisis!" Kaoru pleads with the Chairman's secretary.

"You don't have an appointment; the Chairman is a very busy man."

"Tono says that – "

The door opens. "Who's making all that noise?"

"Yuzuru-sama!" Kaoru goes out on a limb and opts for the term of address when they're speaking informally, as friend to parent. "May I have five minutes of your time, please?"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Blazing across the wide expanse of the South lawn to return to class, Kaoru speed-dials a number.

"Hacker-san!" he pants, "Get me Princess Michelle on the phone right now! Yes, use my real name, she knows who I am! Then, I need you to send something to the school pronto…"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The instant the bell goes off for recess, Kaoru dashes out to collect a miniature package from the school office.

"Kaoru!" Hikaru dogs his heels. "Stop! You're scaring me!"

"No time!" Kaoru hurls at him, taking the final four steps at a go and slamming into Class 1-A.

"Chika!" he says frighteningly, looming over him.

"W-What?" Yasuchika stammers – Kaoru can only imagine how crazed he looks and how the first-years must feel.

He drags Yasuchika out. "Come with me! The rest of you, breathe a word about this to any living soul and you'll discover how I earned my reputation."

In a suitably empty classroom, Kaoru commands, "Sit."

Defiantly, Yasuchika says, "Huh?!"

A wicked grin spreads across Kaoru's face as he removes the lid from the box package with a sense of theatrical drama.

Yasuchika squeaks.

With his thumb and index finger, Kaoru pinches the tiny tail of the fluffy yellow toy chick and brings it to the tip of Yasuchika's nose, wielding it like Honey wields Usa-chan.

His junior's pupils dilate and go glassy.

_Tono, lend me your strength._

"Chika," Kaoru says temptingly, caressing his cheek with the fur of the toy chick, "Would you be interested in joining my club?"

"You – you – "

"In my club, there will be dozens of suuuuuuper cuuuuuute animals!" Kaoru proclaims. "Baby chicks, baby guinea pigs, baby rabbits, baby ducklings!"

The poor boy is on the verge of psychological breakdown.

"Everyday you can see them, everyday they will call out to you, Chika!" To lure him, Kaoru takes one of his hands and guides him to stroke the back of the toy chick. "Without anyone to care for them, what will happen to these helpless little creatures? How will they survive without your kindness, Chika? Will you pass up the opportunity for you to look, to touch, to_ feed_, to _carry_?"

Yasuchika whimpers sadly.

"Have a think about it." Kaoru kisses his temple tenderly, closing his junior's fingers over the fluffball.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"… That was fucking terrifying!" Hikaru gasps, awed. "It was like Tono's charm mixed with Kyouya-senpai's evilness!"

Huddled behind a pillar, Kaoru tracks a carefree teenager who is in the midst of demolishing a plate of sashimi.

"I need to convince Satoshi – ideas?"

Hikaru makes a scoffing sound and cracks his knuckles.

"In the bag," he says confidently, breezing past Kaoru. "Watch and learn, amateur."

"Satoshi, yo!"

The black-haired teen brightens. "Hika-nii!"

"So, because of the gaping hole that Mori-senpai left in our club, we've kinda fallen foul of the school rules," Hikaru says, "and now we're running a recruitment drive. Join us?"

"Yasuchika isn't keen on it because of Mitsukuni-san, Hika-nii – you know Yasuchika's bad attitude."

"Kaoru's gotten Yasuchika to consider it properly – after karate today, Yasuchika might come along. You don't have to quit kendo or karate either, Satoshi. It's just," Hikaru gulps, full of emotion, "our club cannot do without a Morinozuka! Last year, we owed so much to Mori-senpai – the tea, the seriousness, the _strength_! Whenever any of us got into trouble, when Haruhi was kidnapped, when Tono was trapped in the Suou mansion, Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai were there to bail us out – I ask you, Satoshi, we have no member who is as skilled in martial arts as Mori-senpai – don't you want to protect Mori-senpai's legacy?!"

Satoshi sparkles. "Wow! Taka-nii is incredible!"

"Isn't he?!" Hikaru trumpets, all raging blood and samurai loyalty. "Your Taka-nii, our Takashi-senpai, it is like he is superhuman! He is always there for us, and although we want you to find your own path in life, we want to be there to walk with you, as your Taka-nii has walked with us!"

Kaoru is _dying_, he can't get enough air into his lungs and there's a stitch in his side, his hands are applauding Hikaru of their own volition.

"And if you come to club today," Hikaru leans over the table, "you can see the jaw-dropping costume that my brother made for yours – you can appreciate how, by his looks alone, our Takashi-senpai is upholding your Morinozuka name."

"Deal!" Satoshi says. "I'll head over with Yasuchika, Hika-nii! I can't wait to see Taka-nii and Mitsukuni-san, too!"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Hikaru, words fail me – that is how brilliant you are."

Hikaru smiles smugly, leaning backwards with his chair teetering on two legs. "Easy as pie. When I genuinely like Satoshi and respect Mori-senpai, there's no need to act, is there?"

"You can become a Morinozuka," Kaoru says, taking out the chemistry practice paper for the next class. "You'd pass all the tests."

"Nowhere near! I'd get thrashed by the small fry in their dojo – no need even to mention me in the same breath as the actual Morinozukas."

Kaoru's phone beeps.

"_Should be OK, sweetie. Preparing preliminary notice, hopefully ready by 5 latest 6. Study hard. Love you and Hikaru."_

"Who's that?"

Kaoru grins stupidly and cradles his phone, weak from the relish of his accomplishment.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

At the lunch bell, Hikaru questions, "Again?"

"Yes. Eat without me, I won't be long."

Swiftly, Kaoru makes his way to the third music room, unlocking the door and slipping inside.

In his bundle of keys, there is a new key ring – when he'd arrived home after dinner with Yuuichi and Kiyomi, the servants had given him a parcel. Inside were instructions and a key ring: a four-leaf clover with a GPS embedded in it that feeds continually into the computer at their HQ – each of the four leaves can be displaced to reveal a button underneath, one to send an SOS signal to Hacker-san, another to produce an ear-splitting sound, another to illuminate the entire four-leaf clover for it to function as a torch, and lastly, to record sounds at Kaoru's location for live transmission to Hacker-san.

Kaoru presses the fourth button.

"Hacker-san, sorry I couldn't try this out yesterday – my friends were at my house, but you already knew that. Confirm that it's you: what was the first thing you ordered PAIS-LE to give me?"

In couple of minutes, an alert pops up on Kaoru's laptop: _"Hot chocolate."_

"What is the colour of the buttons that adjust volume?"

Another alert: _"Purple, small."_

"Okay. Kiyomi-san ambushed me at school and I had dinner with them. You know my timetable; we can't go to Todai until Monday at the earliest. The key ring is ingenious, thanks for your initiative. I was worried that nobody knew I was at their house."

Alert: _"Not as worried as I was, Kaoru-san. Thought of telling Hikaru-san that you'd disappeared."_

"I'm glad now you didn't," Kaoru says, and brings her up to date. "That's why we're going to celebrate Kyouya-senpai's birthday with him first and foremost, and I suspect he also doesn't want the others to be dwelling on this during the weekend. Great job connecting me to Princess Michelle. If I press the SOS button or if my location indicates that I'm in danger, what is your plan of action?"

Alert: _"Kaoru-san's Hotta."_

Kaoru laughs. "He's Kyouya-senpai's Hotta, but good idea. That's perfect, it'll get me the help I need. So the clover is a one-way transmission only, and I can only get your responses through phone or computer? How are you sending these alerts?"

Alert: _"You call me Hacker-san, Kaoru-san."_

Kaoru rolls his eyes though she's not here to see it. "Specificity."

Alert: _"GPS + Time of day means Kaoru-san is in school. Remotely hacked school's intranet and isolated Kaoru-san's userID."_

"You're plenty useful, aren't you. The projects that I set for you, are they ready? Are they done?"

Alert: _"Shares are yours, poised to buy more. Programs not done, best estimate is Sunday delivery, will rush to complete before your Kyouya-senpai's birthday."_

"Right, see you then. It's nice having someone on standby for me."

Alert: _"Sure, Kaoru-san. Have fun."_

Kaoru jabs the button again and slides the leaf close.

He goes to the club restroom to splash cold water on his face, and braces himself to make this last call.

"Hello? Ootori-sama, how do you do? This is Kaoru; if I've intruded on your lunchtime, I'm sorry. Yes. Yes, I'm calling about Kyouya-senpai's resignation. I'd like to propose an alternative…"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

All that dashing around has left him ragged.

He collapses onto his desk at 3:30 pm. "I have no energy for club, Hikaru."

"Who asked you to drain yourself?" Hikaru says, nonetheless curling his arm around Kaoru consolingly. "Come on, president, we need you to tell us what to wear."

"Carry me," Kaoru asks, unmoving.

"You really think I'm a Morinozuka?"

"Oh! Go find Mori-senpai to carry me! He's here by now, I bet."

"He is here. Kyouya has let Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai into the clubroom," Tamaki attests to it. "Slacking off, Kaoru? How can the president be the last to show up?"

"Hey," Hikaru says in vexation, "is the clock in your classroom fast or something? Did someone wind it so that you guys can finish before everyone else?"

"Tono, carry me."

"My back's still hurting," Tamaki says, picking up Kaoru's bag for him instead. "Hikaru was very rough with me."

"What!"

"Tono only loves you, Hikaru," Kaoru sniffs. "He refuses to do things for me but he does everything for you."

"Noo!" Tamaki sheds bitter tears. "Okay, I'll carry you, Kaoru!"

"No thanks. You dropped Hikaru."

"Why do the two of you complain just to complain?!"

In unison, the twins reply, "Because we like to hear each other's voices."

"Let's do that in the clubroom." Tamaki hauls Kaoru to his feet. "We have good acoustics in there."

"Duh, it's a music room?"

"I want Mori-senpai."

"Ah," says a deep voice from around the door.

"Mori-senpai!" Hikaru greets, a bit of Satoshi in his demeanour.

Mori pats his head. "Kyouya says not to dally."

They troop to their destination, Kaoru yawning all the while.

"Man, you need Kyouya-senpai's present," Hikaru remarks. "Didn't sleep well last night?"

"So-so. Ugh, my battery's almost flat – if Mum calls you, Hikaru, tell me immediately."

"You want me to use my phone during club? Do you know what Kyouya-senpai will do to me?"

"Hand it over; I'll switch the SIM card."

"What, are you abusing your privileges? Do you even have this privilege? Kyouya-senpai himself never uses the phone during club except for club matters."

Kaoru waves his phone in front of Hikaru. "Today, this takes precedence over _everything_."

Without pause, he sweeps into the room. "Honey-senpai!"

"Kao-chan, I love the cake! The tempered chocolate gears are so finely detailed!"

"I ordered it for you and you alone, Honey-senpai."

"Honey-senpai," Hikaru butts in, "I can't believe you always fall for such shameless bootlicking."

"That's because Honey-senpai is mine," Kaoru says, distributing the outfits to everyone. "Put on the basic pieces – whatever you can figure out, you can wear yourself. For the complicated accessories and anything else that bamboozles you entirely, call me."

"Honey-senpai is not yours!"

"Yes, I am! And Kao-chan is mine," Honey giggles.

Hikaru clears his throat. "Excuse me, Honey-senpai, Kaoru is _mine_."

The most innocent of expressions is three times more potent when painted onto Honey's features. Cunningly, Honey doesn't engage Hikaru, letting Kaoru's silence speak for itself.

Chaos breaks out.

"Kaoru!" Hikaru rounds on him. "How can you give yourself away to someone else?!"

"Ehh? Ehhh?!" Tamaki clutches his head, thoroughly confused.

Hikaru doesn't get any reaction from Kaoru save an infuriatingly enigmatic smile. "Mori-senpai! How could you allow this to happen?!"

"Ah," is Mori's opinion on the matter.

Kaoru is admiring his handiwork when, out of the corner of his eye, he sees Kyouya.

Kyouya, who isn't engrossed in work or using his laptop.

Kyouya, who is standing quietly by the windowsill observing all of them – another form of note-taking, one that will preserve this moment in a place infinitely more precious than bound paper.

There is a simmering rage that's consuming Kaoru. If he hadn't been told by another source, Kyouya would be enduring this all by himself.

The thought burns in his chest, making him want to rail at Kyouya or hug him again.

Mostly, hug him again.

"Come here, Kyouya-senpai," Kaoru requests, stretching a hand in his direction.

Kyouya blinks, uncrosses his arms and strides over.

_It will be all right_, Kaoru thinks, and he doesn't say it only because Kyouya doesn't set store by such platitudes. _Give me a few more hours to prove it to you._

"… Yes?"

"What?" Kaoru ties a neckerchief around Honey.

"You asked me to come here."

"Nothing, I just don't like you standing so far away."

Kyouya arches an eyebrow; the others look at him strangely.

"Change, please? I have to do your hair," Kaoru tells him. "Honey-senpai, your goggles. Do you want to wear it on your head or around your neck? If on your head, I'll style your hair too. Hikaru, could you help Tono with his corset? Sorry, Tono, it's restrictive, but the femininity balances out the masculinity of your top hat and everything else very well, and you have a nice waist."

They're short on time – Kaoru's fault. He attaches various cables to Mori's belt and loops them casually halfway around his body to be fastened on another location on the same belt.

"Waistcoat, Kyouya-senpai! Honey-senpai, help Kyou – yeah, all three brass buckles have to be – Kyouya-senpai, stand up straight – if you buckle all three, there'll be a defined shape."

Hikaru snags the heated styling iron.

"Kaoru, Kyouya-senpai's hair is what – "

"Goggles tilted to one side, volume at root, spiked at ends! Mori-senpai, I've to tie your shoelaces, could you – ? Great, thanks. Tono, stop messing with your clockwork!"

"Kao-chan, you aren't dressed at all!"

"I can get myself done in five minutes!"

"There is only five minutes!" Tamaki and Hikaru exclaim together.

"Don't panic!" Kaoru says, panicking. He gives the five of them a once-over to ensure that all the components are there, and retreats to the side room to change in case he's not in time.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Noise explodes from Hikaru's and Tamaki's corner.

The majority of customers have clumped around them today, doubtless to catch a glimpse of whatever saucy rumour happens to be going round. Kaoru has no desire to be in the thick of it, especially when half his mind is on his phone.

Mori, Honey and Kyouya are all rather nonplussed at the rise of this new pairing, not being present during the, uh, 'blossoming stage of the relationship' – by itself, a change of popular opinion is not anything extraordinary. Not everyone likes the established pairings; that's how Renge's doujinshi have been making a roaring trade in the student market, and Kaoru has been paired together with virtually every other host and more.

No, what makes this unprecedented is the degree of avidity. As a witness, Kaoru understands that the girls have honestly come to accept that Tamaki and Hikaru are romantically involved, and everyone is interested because people either like it, dislike it or are opening their eyes to new dimensions – all three options lead to the same result: they have to watch the boys in action.

Kaoru is hosting with Mori and Honey, chatting with the customers.

"Kaoru-kun, I can't take my eyes off your gorgeous boots!"

"They're my mother's, but we can more-or-less wear each other's shoes."

"I love the Plato's Atlantis collection!" one of the princesses says eagerly. "This pair is so beautiful, the oil slick is mesmerising! My mother won't let me wear any of the McQueen heels, she says they're too high."

"They _are_ high." Kaoru sticks a leg out. "Does anyone want to measure the height of the heel?"

"Kaoru-sama's designs are lovely," says a new first-year customer who'd designated Mori. "I especially like the way Kaoru-sama plays around with gender and androgyny. Who knew Tamaki-sama's shoulders would look so manly with a cinched waist?"

Laughing, Kaoru tells her, "Well, as Vivienne Westwood says, it is not possible for a man to be elegant without a touch of femininity. If you notice Kyouya-senpai's collar, it's shaped to lie open – more like a woman's blouse – and senpai has a slender neck and very attractive collarbones."

"Oh, it's true!" they gasp.

"Kao-chan is detail-oriented." Honey exhibits his steampunk cake to them. "It's so pretty that it's hard to eat it."

"I can have more of them made for you anytime you want them, Honey-senpai," Kaoru promises in a tone saturated with more sugar than any dessert in existence.

Hikaru crows in victory as Tamaki's dominoes – gears lined up on their sides – come crashing down; the rest of the girls stop assembling their mechanical contraptions to offer their condolences to Tamaki.

"I win! You have to serve me and call me Hikaru-sama for a week!"

"You cheated!" Tamaki screeches. "I saw you push it!"

"Did not!"

"Kaoru," Kyouya says lowly, having come up behind them. _Why are you sitting here, and what possessed you to leave those two together?_

"You're very welcome to correct my mistake, Kyouya-senpai," Kaoru quips impudently, leaning against Mori like a deflated soufflé. His senior shifts to accommodate him at a more comfortable angle.

Kyouya perches on the armrest. "How did this…_ fascination_ with them arise?"

Kaoru lets his head loll to the side, fixing his gaze on Honey pointedly.

"Ehh?" Honey's rosy flowers are freewheeling aerially. "Me?"

"And a series of double entendres sealed their fate," sighs Kaoru. For someone who is all hard planes and solid muscle, Mori is a superb pillow – and that _body heat_! Sheer bliss, like Kaoru is snuggled up in blankets beside a fireplace.

_Are you certain?_ Kyouya asks, bringing about a harshly acrid sense of déjà vu. _Is there a chance that Hikaru might fall for Tamaki?_

Kaoru stares at him, feeling gutted like a fish. How unimaginable the torture – to love two people who love each other!

The words feed a high voltage current into his veins; better safe than sorry, he jolts upwards to reclaim Hikaru. This time, he won't be stupid about it anymore. This time, he won't risk Hikaru's heart on a no-hope scenario.

A hand shoots out, catches him and pulls him back down.

_Mori-senpai?_

Reassuringly, Mori squeezes his arm. _I'll monitor it._

Honey hasn't faltered once in leading a merry conversation about the best stuffing for plush toys, yet there is a hyperawareness in his aura that the girls don't have – he's listening in while deflecting attention, and Mori motions to the half-concealed pot of brown sugar as though Kaoru had been searching for it, using the tongs to drop a cube into Kaoru's tea. Tuned in to both spoken and unspoken dialogues, Kyouya chips in with his opinions about the varying weights of different stuffings and the possible health dangers to newborn infants before circling off to supervise the other cluster of hosts.

… Barely a ripple made for all the swirling torrents. Utterly ridiculous.

Daggers in his smile, Kyouya says, "Instead of that intricate arm prosthesis, Kaoru would have been better off fashioning a new brain for either of you, preferably with cogs that actually mesh together."

Tamaki and Hikaru shrivel up as the girls twitter away.

"Don't lump me in the same category as Tono, Kyouya-senpai!"

"Hikaru! You always throw me under the bus at the first sign of trouble!"

"That's because I'm too valuable! The world is waiting for me to revolutionise the way they dress!"

Kyouya pushes his glasses up with a finger. "Is there a reason you are subjecting your customers to further idiocy?"

They shudder, the teapots rattling in their hands as they top up their customers' cups.

Kaoru laughs to himself, getting up to resume his own duties.

"Kao-chan?"

"Oh, nothing, senpai," he says, stacking up the used plates. "It's just, when Kyouya-senpai is terrorising people, he enjoys it so much that it's kinda…"

Mori's mouth curves upwards ever so slightly.

"Cute," Kaoru decides.

"Hee. Kao-chan is cuter!"

Extremely sappily, Kaoru says, "Honey-senpai is _cutest_."

Overhearing the last part, Hikaru pretends to gag as he tows Kaoru away. "Let's go, Kaoru, I'm rescuing you from yourself. Matsushita-san saw your gallery on pixiv, she wants to ask if you're willing to share your brushes."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

At 5:32 pm, twenty-eight minutes before the close of club, Kaoru receives a text message.

He excuses himself to read it, and accordingly switches to his laptop to open the new email in his inbox. Up pops a CG image of a secret fantasy garden from Kaoru's private portfolio, modified to have calligraphy imprinted upon it to extend an invitation that will unquestionably become the most sought-after privilege amongst his peers.

Triumph ignites at his core, flooding his body with adrenaline.

_"Mother, how are you so perfect? Please send out the invitations whenever you're ready. I love you, thank you so much."_

Snapping his phone shut, Kaoru glances around to see if anyone is looking at him. Kyouya is, his eyebrows raised at the breach of the club's phone policy during session.

Discreetly pressing a button on the clover in his pocket, Kaoru murmurs, "Fax it."

Then, he picks up one of the glasses and taps on it with a silver knife. Everyone turns to him, falling into a hush.

"To all of the princesses, thank you for your honoured patronage – not only for today but for every time that you have bestowed your affections on us," Kaoru says appreciatively. "For years, you – not us – have been the backbone of this club, and we would be nothing without you. I admit that I never thought I would form such attachments in this place, but I've never been happier to be proved wrong."

Many of the girls grace him with a smile.

"As you know, this is the last host club session before we pause for exams."

They nod, as mystified as the hosts.

Kaoru takes in a controlled breath, feeling oddly constricted. Who could have foreseen that the deathblow would come from him?

Meeting the current president's eyes squarely, followed individually by those of his beloved friends and finally holding the vice-president's gaze, he says, "I regret to announce that this will also be the last ever host club session."


	18. Chapter 6C

**CHAPTER SIX**

**The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!**

.

The shockwave surges through the clubroom.

A riot erupts.

"EHHHH?! WHAT?!"

Tamaki and Hikaru had shot up from the sofa. "Kaoru?!"

"Kao-chan?!" Honey cries, fork clattering onto the plate. Mori and Kyouya are rooted to the spot, dark eyes blown wide.

Everyone keeps shouting his name and demanding explanations, making it impossible for him to actually clarify things for them. Kaoru's not going to say a word until he has their undivided, rapt attention – to talk when nobody is listening is the surest sign of poor leadership, competing against the volume of the majority is an unwinnable war.

When they figure that out, the girls shush each other and manage to subdue Tamaki and Hikaru.

"Thank you," Kaoru acknowledges, noting that Yasuchika and Satoshi are crossing the courtyard and will probably be up in the clubroom in about five minutes. "Ordinarily there would have been a party to mark the occasion, but I can't see any reason for celebration in the end of a club as glorious as – "

"Then what the hell do you think you're doing, Kaoru?!"

Ah, damn, Hikaru's taking it really badly. Without the relevant facts, Kaoru would've been furious, too.

But this is the way for everyone to live.

"Why do we have to shut down the club?" Tamaki demands. "What's wrong? You said we only needed to hire more members!"

It sets off another round of complaints and laments, worse than the previous one.

_Come on, guys_, Kaoru sighs mentally. _Ugh._

Being unable to assert himself is probably the larger stumbling block for Kaoru in terms of efficient leadership, really. He has the patience to outwait an unruly crowd – what he lacks is the lordly authority, the chutzpah.

"Is that it? Is that there some problem you aren't telling us? Tono, let's go talk to your father!"

_I'm trying to tell you!_

"Excuse me, ladies," Kyouya cuts in smoothly, effortlessly becoming the axis of the universe, "I apologise for the undue distress – we will sort out this internal matter with the greatest of urgency. I'm sure there must be some terrible misunderstanding."

He strides to the doors and opens them, making his meaning unambiguous. "Please expect a notification from us that will rectify this situation in a manner that will be most satisfactory – "

"No!" Kaoru objects, zipping to the door and attempting to wrestle it from Kyouya's grip. "No, the customers – "

Unobtrusively, Kyouya _glares_.

Chilled to the bone, Kaoru nonetheless persists. "The customers have to stay! They will – "

"Kaoru-senpai? What's going on?" Satoshi asks upon seeing the commotion.

"Satoshi! Wait in the clubroom with Chika! I have to – "

"Ladies, please," Kyouya smiles.

All of them make to comply, astutely deducing that Kyouya and Tamaki are the ones who will put a stop to Kaoru's madness and restore their cherished host club.

"No! Kyouya-senpai, I'm – !"

Kyouya grabs him by the waist, partly to remove him from blocking the exit and partly to draw him close. That pair of cold eyes looks like it will never forgive him. _Silence. Yourself._

Kaoru doesn't have enough to counter Kyouya's dominance and they all know it.

Good thing that his power has always come from a distinctly different source, in a form that is _made_ to neutralise forcefulness instead of trying foolishly to top it with more aggression.

He relaxes his body, which loosens Kyouya's hold – though he is genuinely frightened by the inhuman depths of iciness that his friend is capable of, he reaches up to place a hand around Kyouya's neck and whispers directly in his ear, "I won't allow you to quit."

It defuses the hostility between them instantly, replacing it with a tension that is far more pleasant and highly agreeable to Kaoru. He loves surprising people, even if Kyouya isn't so fond of being sprung upon.

He grins in the face of his senior's complete astonishment; unhindered, he wades through the raucous sea of customers who are bustling around to gather whatever things belong to them and climbs onto the coffee table.

Any and all movement ceases at the blare of the alarm siren – less than a day, and already his clover is indispensable.

"Let me finish," he says. "Sit down, please, everyone. Hosts _and_ customers."

"Kaoru, why are you – ?!"

"Hikaru, Tamaki," Kyouya quells them. He exchanges a look with Mori, and the both of them find a chair each.

"Mori-senpai!" Hikaru snaps.

The girls see fit to follow Mori and Kyouya's example.

"Kyouya!"

Honey studies Kaoru for a moment and nods. "Sit down, Tama-chan and Hika-chan."

Stubbornly, Hikaru says, "Are you guys just going to let Kaoru – "

Thankfully, Mori had chosen a chair that'd been altered for today's theme – he wheels over and tugs Hikaru down to sit on his lap, using his arms as a cage to trap him.

Absently, Kaoru reflects on how much more work he needs to put into his management skills… Better start learning the secrets from his mother and Kyouya ASAP.

"It has come to my attention," Kaoru begins, fabricating lies to weave into the fabric of truth in order to have an impervious explanation, "that we are perceived as a club of ill repute."

"Like that's ever bothered us?!"

Inaudible to the rest of them, Mori says something to Hikaru. Frustrated, Hikaru exhales – the gust of air blowing his fringe upwards – and slumps against Mori irritably.

"It has become relevant _now_," Kaoru says, "because there is a sufficient number of students who are associated with our club who have graduated from high school, enough for some unexpected adverse effects to make themselves known. I have received complaints from parents and students – who shall remain anonymous, naturally – that the name of our club is a detriment not just to their daughters' marriage prospects, but of course to the prospects of all of us present in this room. This is an extremely valid concern as we are all individuals with more than our own reputations to protect – we either have a high media profile, or we can be thrust into the spotlight overnight in the event of a scandal. For those of us who wish to form matrimonial alliances with foreigners or even with Japanese people from other schools, how will we explain what it is we do in the club? Word has travelled to the parents that I will be succeeding our dear Tono as president, and many of them have approached me to discuss this issue with utmost seriousness. Please understand that I am obliged to react to this."

He goes over to his table and picks up a thick, A4-sized brown envelope.

"Therefore, when I said that today is the last day of the_ host_ club, it's true. We will be reforming our club under a changed name and with different objectives – no longer will it operate in a structure where a group of boys provides entertainment to female customers. Instead, this will become a club for the pursuit of all-rounded excellence. As I mentioned to my princess earlier – "

Kaoru waves at his regular, and she beams brightly.

" – we are essentially a club of clubs, are we not? In the past couple of years, we have dabbled in activities that are the specific focus of other clubs in the school. The potential for personal development and growth has been and will be a service offered by this club – only, this time, it will become its main objective. Members will interact often to gain practice in social situations and enhance their interpersonal etiquette – "

Kyouya hides a smile – he's caught on.

Same in subject matter but under a different title; a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. They aren't changing the substance of their club at all, merely the way it will be received by the masses. Euphemisms, legalese, figures of speech, turns of phrase – Kyouya's favourites.

" – as part of a compulsory education program that will stand us in good stead when we step out into society. We will develop a solid grounding in all areas comprising the arts, sports, general knowledge. The Chairman has agreed that it is quite acceptable for us to be a 'nomadic club' – that is, we have permission to join other school clubs for a period of time to become temporary or honorary members. In this manner, both ex-customers and ex-hosts will be free to date other people without the shadow of a host club hanging over their heads, and all of you princesses will be able to get engaged without having to contend with disapproving parents or a fiancé who wants you to leave the club out of a misguided idea of how it will damage your image."

Deliberately, Kaoru opens the envelope and takes out a pile of white paper. Time to kill two birds with one stone.

"Hence, we will be needing new members."

It sends them into an insane flurry.

This time, Kaoru activates his clover-alarm immediately, not letting them hit their stride.

"QUIET!" He fans out the papers and displays it to them. "Yes, you've guessed correctly – as we are not hosting anymore, the membership is open to anyone who wants to join without restrictions of gender, subject only to the approval of the executive council of the new club. Satoshi and Yasuchika have signed up already. As a teaser of what will be on offer, Yasuchika has undertaken to head the 'Animal Education' branch of the club – the club will have official guardianship over a group of animals, and members will have to learn the appropriate ways of caring for these vulnerable creatures. Satoshi has undertaken to head the 'Physical Education' branch, which will see him liaising with the sports clubs and organisations for members to gain insight into various sports and experience playing a game that they may perhaps not have been inclined to try on their own."

Honey's eyes are sparkling, Mori's lips are twitching, and Tamaki and Hikaru are gobsmacked.

"Hence, even though there is no cause for celebration in the end of the host club, there will be a party for the opening of the new club for all members. At the moment, we have decided upon an initial membership pool of 50 members – "

Kyouya's head is lowered; tremors of laughter are discernible in his shoulders.

Exactly as Tamaki had pointed out, the open interviews clause is mostly for the purposes of recruitment and not for punishment – therefore it is nullified once a club manages to hit 50 members.

" – for the pilot run of the new club. As an expression of our gratitude to you, our long-term supporters, we are giving you the first opportunity to sign up for – "

His voice is drowned by an upheaval of noise. "YES! YES, WE'LL JOIN! GIVE US THE FORMS, KAORU-KUN/SAMA!"

Euphoric, Kaoru claps purposefully. "Okay, okay! Queue up, please! Don't push! It's likely that everyone will get one, so there's no – "

Somebody takes the entire stack from him.

"Yes," Kyouya agrees, withholding the forms from the horde, "there's no hurry. Ladies, I am certain that everyone will get their hands on a form. Now, please queue up; let's do this in an orderly fashion or we may _lose_ one of your forms, which would result in a failure to register you and an allocation of your spot to someone else – how regrettable will that be?"

Kaoru almost – _almost_ – laughs at Kyouya's threat. That would be forgetting himself, since the girls are still customers at this point in time.

"Tamaki, could you fetch the pens? Satoshi, Yasuchika, Hikaru, come here." Kyouya splits the stack into three and directs each of them to go to a corner of the room for the girls to line up and fill in their details _in an orderly fashion_.

Meanwhile, Kaoru is more than happy to relinquish all authority to Kyouya. He wanders over to Honey with what he knows is a toothache-inducing smile plastered on, bends over to bring himself level with his senior, and says softly, "Chika's going to take care of baby chicks around the clock, and maybe they will wear him down. One day, Honey-senpai, Chika will know it's okay to like cute things."

Honey chokes up with tears. "Kao-chan!"

Kaoru giggles impishly, his heart about to rupture from emotion. "I love you too, Honey-senpai."

They cuddle each other tightly as a soothing hand ruffles Kaoru's hair. Mori's eyes are knowing and intense with amusement – he must have connected the dots as to Kaoru's agenda.

"I wondered if Kyouya would be made to resign. It's clever," he praises, and like lightning, Kaoru suddenly, painfully understands the hero worship for the amazing Taka-nii.

Aglow, Kaoru has a total Satoshi moment when he trills, "Mori-senpai!"

Mori actually smiles, and Kaoru fairly combusts.

"Kyou-chan's coming." Honey's tone is way too slick.

Kaoru tries to wipe the jubilant expression off his face. Really, he tries, but he knows he's only succeeding in looking coy.

"Mori-senpai, can you see to it that the forms are collected and the customers are dismissed without any more fuss? Honey-senpai, I'm counting on you to oversee the clean-up. I will be going to the office to obtain the requisite forms to change the status of our club. Kaoru, come with me."

Obediently, Kaoru traipses along as they slip out of the room, unnoticed.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Kaoru will answer all of Kyouya's questions without him asking.

His fingers are clasped around his phone, a number logged in it in preparation for when they are alone.

As predicted, Kyouya makes for the second music room instead of the stairs that would take them out of the building to the main office. Expectantly, he holds the door open, and Kaoru presses 'call' as he passes through.

By the time Kyouya locks the door and turns around, the recipient of Kaoru's call has picked up.

This time, Kaoru does erase any trace of elation or pride from his voice.

"Hello? Ootori-sama? Yes, this is Kaoru."

Stunned, Kyouya stares.

It is _very_ daring, he knows. God, he hopes it pays off and Kyouya doesn't kill him or push him away.

_One: I presume that was done for my sake?_

"I have upheld my side of the agreement, Ootori-sama. Yes, it's been announced – I can't take it back. The existing club members have consented to it and our schoolmates are exceedingly enthusiastic at the idea. We will retain the commendable elements of our old club but eliminate the hosting component or any other component that would have us accused of impropriety – yes. Yes… Yes, I will take charge of the PR aspect. I have contacted some parents who I knew were concerned about this issue, and they have been and will continue to ensure that the media cannot smear the names of anyone associated with the club. Yuzuru-sama himself has been diligently preserving our reputations."

Kyouya's hand falls from the doorknob; he comes over and props himself against the piano.

_Two: How much do you know?_

"About half an hour ago, I faxed a number of documents to Hotta with instructions to either leave them on your desk or hand them to you when you return home, Ootori-sama. Princess Michelle – "

Were Kyouya a lesser human being, he'd have jumped in shock. As it is, those intelligent eyes go round.

Kaoru smiles, feeling so much adoration that it hurts a little.

" – was delighted to sign up to our club! She remembers us very fondly and considers herself in our debt; in fact, she says that she would have done anything to help save the club and was most pleased to be of assistance. A copy of her membership application has been forwarded to you, along with a written promise by Yuzuru-sama that he will expel me from the club if I do not nominate Princess Michelle as my vice-president. Yes – ah, right, if the Constitution of the new club provides for elected leadership, I am to cede to Princess Michelle any leadership post that I am elected to, unless she herself gains a post in the executive council… Yes, I accept responsibility for cultivating a positive image for the club and its leaders, such that it will reflect very well on Kyouya-senpai and Princess Michelle to have been a part of it… Yuzuru-sama has been made aware of… Yes, Ootori-sama, she will be in my class… I see… oh, I see – of course I will."

Ootori-sama asks if Kyouya is there.

"Yes, he is," Kaoru says, looking at his senior. "Please hold on for a moment, Ootori-sama, he's with the customers; I'll get him."

Kaoru doesn't surrender the phone, not yet. He covers the mouthpiece.

_Three: Who else knows?_

"The others don't know anything except that Ootori-sama is searching for a fiancée for Kyouya-senpai," Kaoru replies concisely. "Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai definitely know that the proposed change was for you, so they've guessed that Ootori-sama wanted you to quit, although nobody knows anything about the identity of the fiancée or that any decision has been made at all."

_Four: What do you intend to do?_

And,_ Five: What arrangements have you made?_

Kaoru chooses to answer question five first. "Kyouya-senpai has probably surmised that I have all the necessary paperwork to give effect to the change, and I will manage the reorganisation process; I won't saddle you with any additional burden."

At last, he places the small device in Kyouya's palm, still careful that they are not overheard.

Four: "I won't say a word, I know it's not my place. They'll find out whenever you want them to. Let's celebrate your birthday to the fullest this weekend, Kyouya-senpai."

As he finishes speaking, he lets his hands drop from where they'd been holding Kyouya's, smiles again and spins on his heel to head towards the exit.

"Yes, Father?" Kyouya doesn't make Ootori-sama wait any longer, though he hasn't taken his eyes off Kaoru, not once.

_Please don't be angry, Kyouya-senpai_, Kaoru thinks, unable to read his senior and feeling a stab of insecurity. _This is only the first of the presents that I've got lined up for you, and I don't know what I'll do with myself if you hate them._

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The shutter clicks once, capturing the image of the club members in the midst of changing out of their cosplay outfits.

"Kaoru!"

"Don't worry, Tono. I'll make sure there's no nudity," he sniggers. Being the first day of their long-awaited sleepover, Kaoru had readied his camera to record the event – that it happens to coincide with the last day of the host club is an accident, one that makes it all the more fortunate that someone has a camera on hand.

"Or we'll keep the nude photos as blackmail," Hikaru says, and Tamaki topples over with one leg in his trousers and one leg out.

"You're just a pervert if you like to keep that type of photographs!"

"You're one to talk! Who knows what sort of films have been playing in your inner mind theatre?!"

Click. Honey beside his cupboard of sweets, filching a few for his own consumption later on.

"Do you want some, Kao-chan?"

Click. Mori pushing the furniture back into place.

"Kaoru, your foot."

Kaoru steps out of the way and goes into the side rooms.

He wants to apologise to Tamaki for wrecking his club, but he's at a loss – Tamaki can be and is very sharp regarding Kyouya, and apologising might mean having the whole story tumble out despite Kaoru's best intentions. What should Kaoru say when Tamaki asks why he's the only one who knows of Kyouya's impending resignation? Will it drive a wedge between the pair of best friends? What if Tamaki decides to pursue the line of inquiry that leads to the question of why Kyouya has to quit in the first place?

After the fact, worry sets in.

Kaoru had known that his actions are reckless and presumptuous, and his upcoming plans might be more impulsive still. There's no way for him to disguise the mastermind behind the reconstruction of the host club – if Kiyomi and Yuuichi thought that Ootori-sama was being 'soft', what would they think now that Kaoru has (probably) secured not only Kyouya's but Princess Michelle's involvement in the club?

Actually, Kaoru really is capable of a great deal of stupidity, isn't he?

Troubled, he brings up the sample invitation in his inbox.

_Will this make it up to Tono? At the same time that it grants Kyouya-senpai's wish, will it make Tono happy?_

He sends a copy to Princess Michelle, not wanting to explain to his mother or his friends' mothers why she should be included.

Damn it, there's so much to do and he has to study, too. The one thing that Kiyomi had definitely been right about is his grades, and Kaoru's going to at least try – it's not going to kill him to work hard but it might harm his friends if he doesn't. He can't afford to think about things like whether he's good enough… he does anyway.

Maybe for people who've never had anyone to confide in, it's only natural to feel a roller coaster of emotions yet go nowhere on the ride; basically, emotions that are completely overwhelming and completely useless. Over the past two years, it seems like the things that Kaoru cannot tell Hikaru have been increasing; correspondingly, these moments of paralysis have also multiplied.

He can't say what it is that – no, he can't say what it is _at all_. It's similar to staring into an abyss, and Kaoru knows something is staring back.

Since being summoned into Ootori-sama's office, since dinner with Yuuichi and Kiyomi, his spectatorship has officially ended. Perhaps it'd ended even before then, and it'd taken him so long to realise it.

"Where's Kaoru?"

Kaoru hastily stashes his laptop and runs out into the main room. After the shortest of delays, enough to avoid suspicion, he says, "Thank god you have my phone, Kyouya-senpai! I thought I'd lost it – it's really Hikaru's 'cos we switched, and he'd never let me forget it!"

He gets it back and replaces the SIM cards, uncomfortable at Kyouya's scrutiny. "These smartphones drain the battery like mad; it's great you had the foresight to put a charger in the clubroom. There you go, Hikaru – thanks."

"Why're you always hiding in the side rooms? Are you okay?" Hikaru asks as he accepts. "Kyouya-senpai, did you scold him or something? Look, Kaoru's an idiot, we all know that – he should have said something to us, but don't be so hard on him please?"

_Of all the times you could have been perceptive, moron!_

"It's called stocktaking and tidying, Hikaru!" Kaoru says, horrified. "Nobody's said anything to me about it! And even if they did, I'd deserve it, okay?!"

Mori claps a hand onto Kyouya's shoulder.

"No, Mori-senpai! Kyouya-senpai didn't say anything, honest! Can all of you just – "

"It would have been good for you to say something, Kaoru," Tamaki agrees with Hikaru. "Why don't you tell us when you're having problems? We could've solved it together."

Kaoru feels himself go deathly pale.

"Hey! Woah, it's okay, okay? Sit down!"

He flits away when his brother makes to grab him.

"Nobody's angry, Kaoru," Tamaki tries in a gentler voice. "Don't look so awful, it's all right."

"No, I – I know," Kaoru says desperately, "Tono, I'm _sorry_ – it's your club and I totally bypassed you and I – "

"Kyou-chan," an unmistakeable command.

The phone saves Kaoru.

"I'm sorry – I really – I have to take this," he says, backing away for some privacy. "Hello?"

"Hello, Kaoru-kun? I received the invitation! I'm so excited!"

_Oh god. No no no._

"Did you? That's wonderful," Kaoru tells Princess Michelle. "Uh, now is not a good time, can I call you back?"

"Ah," she says, and he can almost see her nodding her head, "Is Kaoru-kun not alone at the moment? Of course. I wanted to know if Kyouya-san's father was willing to let us keep the club – talk to you later, Kaoru-kun."

"Yeah, thanks. Sorry, I've caused you so much inconvenience." Due to the time difference, when he'd rung her, it was during the wee hours of the night, and she'd had to humour him by filling in forms while half-asleep.

"Not as much as what I've caused you and your friends!" she laughs. "Bye!"

He hangs up, unreasonably afraid at having to face the music. The doubt and second-guessing is driving him round the bend.

Kyouya walks briskly to the room that functions as their wardrobe. "Kaoru, help me to change."

"Kyouya/-senpai!" Tamaki and Hikaru surge forward.

"It's fine, I'm not angry. If you're not, why would I be, Tamaki? I merely wanted to speak with Kaoru."

Kaoru winces slightly. He says he's not angry, but his tone is impossibly detached and inscrutable.

_Ootori-sama didn't say anything terrible, did he? Was it really too bold? Should I have kept out of other people's business? Is it not what Kyouya-senpai wanted? Does it not help at all? Not even the tiniest bit?_

Kyouya sighs deeply. "You're overthinking it, silly."

"When does he not," Hikaru mutters.

_Everyone _takes on an expression that shows their wholehearted endorsement of Hikaru's statement.

Kaoru glowers at them.

"Come here," orders Kyouya.

Before Kaoru takes all of five steps, the door to the clubroom opens and the Chairman strolls in. "Why are you boys still here? Can't bear to leave?"

"Otousan!" Tamaki's jaw drops. "What're you doing here?!"

"What, is there anywhere in this school off-limits to me?" He seats himself like he owns the place. "I thought I'd come along to see if my crybaby son is in need of parental comfort at the closing down of his club."

"You!" Tamaki growls, remarkably like the twins when confronted by their grandmother. "I'm not going to cry! We aren't closing down, we're restructuring!"

Yuzuru takes on a happy-go-lucky grin to piss his son off. "Then why aren't all of you off celebrating Kyouya-kun's birthday? Did you forget to prepare a gift, Tamaki, so you thought you'd pretend to forget the birthday?"

"Kyouya's my best friend, of course I remembered!" Tamaki yells at his dad. "I've been planning for _months_! Why're you making a nuisance of yourself, Otousan?! You're the worst!"

"There, there, Tono." Hikaru pats him in commiseration. "Adults are horrible people, I know."

"Are we, Hikaru-kun? Kaoru-kun seems to like us."

_That's 'cos Kaoru is a real suck-up_, Kaoru knows his brother wants to say, and he mirrors the Chairman's grin to direct at Hikaru. _See how he goes '-sama-sama' with all of you and acts like an angel?_

Hikaru rolls his eyes at his twin and says to the Chairman, "That's because he wants you to like him back. He's not content with having us love him – he's greedy, he wants you parents to also think that he's the bestest person to ever walk the earth."

"Is that so, Kaoru-kun?"

"Not at all, Yuzuru-sama," Kaoru replies, his entire countenance contradicting his words. "If I enjoy talking to Yuzuru-sama and the rest of the parents, it's only because all of you are such interesting people. You broaden my horizons and teach me so much in just one conversation."

Hikaru shakes his head in disbelief.

Yuzuru laughs and stands up. "I see, I see. Let's go and have a conversation, then, Kaoru-kun."

Kaoru dips his head and follows him out.

"Wait!" Tamaki yelps, intercepting them. "Huh?! Why do you want to talk to Kaoru, Otousan?"

"Why, to broaden Kaoru-kun's horizons," the Chairman answers as though it's self-evident.

"Now?!"

"What does that even mean?" Hikaru asks the more pertinent question.

Mori, Honey and Kyouya are silent, their brains going at the speed of light.

"Tamaki, you've wasted enough time already – shouldn't you allow Kyouya-kun to change and proceed to have fun? There are some files in my office that Kaoru-kun will need if you are to modify your club – see what a doting father I am, I've arranged it all with the Department of Clubs and Societies for you. The faster we go, the faster Kaoru-kun will come back."

He grasps the handle and abruptly reconsiders. "In fact, why don't you boys head onwards to your sleepover first? Don't you have a surprise waiting for Kyouya-kun?"

"Otousan!" Tamaki censures. "Don't ruin it!"

Taking the hint, Kaoru retrieves his belongings – these days, he has many potentially compromising things that make him nervous just to be separated from them.

"Surprises! I hope you like yours. Kaoru-kun will be along shortly," he says airily, disappearing from view.

Kaoru gives Tamaki a hug. "Tono, I swear, about the club – I'll make it up to you."

He scuttles after the Chairman without a backward glance.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) Yes, I do actually realise that I am writing host club fic and getting rid of the host in the club.

(b) But, canonically speaking, the nature of the club changes when it passes into Yasuchika's and Satoshi's hands anyway (an animal care and petting club).

(c) Host Club = engaged Kyouya = Yoshio says no. (It's fun saying it in Little Britain style: Computer says noooo.)

(d) I am really liking this frequent chapters business. It's almost a chapter a day, or one chapter every two days. I feel like I can actually see the fic going somewhere, haha.


	19. Chapter 6D

**CHAPTER SIX**

**The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!**

.

"Earlier, you made no reference to this at all," Yuruzu says, thoughtful and amused, resting his chin on knitted fingers.

"I didn't know if it could be done, Yuzuru-sama, even if the likelihood was very high."

"Certainly," he smiles. "For as long as I have known Yuzuha-san, I have not encountered much that she cannot do."

Kaoru smiles back, pleased at the compliment.

The Chairman looks at him keenly. "I suppose, instead of you thanking me, I may be the one who has to offer my thanks to you, Kaoru-kun."

_Ah._

Comprehension dawns as to what Yuzuru is getting at.

"Not at all, Yuzuru-sama, no thanks are needed," he says, feeling the sincerity all the way down to his toes and hoping that Yuzuru will know it too. He didn't do any of these things to gain the favour of the Suou family, or to have them in his debt; there was no ulterior motive. "Since Yuzuru-sama is aware of Kyouya-senpai's situation, I will be frank. I did it for Kyouya-senpai, for Tono, for my friends – if it benefits Anne-Sophie-sama greatly, that is just a hugely advantageous side effect. Really, it's a matter of using only one move to achieve more than one goal, and Kyouya-senpai values this type of efficiency."

"He does," Yuzuru laughs, "and you've been doing that all day, haven't you, Kaoru-kun?"

"I… don't want to disappoint my friends."

Light-heartedly, the world-weary head of the Suou family asks, "Is there a reason you use that honorific for Anne-Sophie?"

Again, Kaoru understands. "Does Yuzuru-sama remember the first few times we talked? To establish a rapport, I asked for permission to call you by name and I asked all of the other parents too. I didn't like the underlying implications of addressing some of my friends' parents as '-san' and some as '-sama', thus I made the decision to… standardise it, you could say."

Yuzuru's eyebrows go up slightly. "And what of the implications of standardisation, Kaoru-kun?"

Kaoru gazes back, probing. He thinks he knows what the Chairman wants, but that's no reason for his mouth to bypass his brain – the person he is speaking to _isn't_ Tamaki. "May I be blunt, Yuzuru-sama?"

He nods, gesturing his assent with a wave of his hand.

"I'm aware that the custom is for us to address the higher-ranked families by '-sama'," Kaoru coughs diplomatically, leaving the other side of the coin unsaid: that, by reference to their own family's rank, they address the lower-ranked by '-san', even if they are junior in age to the parents – "but I thought that would be unnecessarily hurtful to a person who has already suffered enough. I guess… it's my way of… of taking away a bit of the insult. I think – I hope it reflects more on me than it reflects my family? I don't think of my family as lesser, and I don't want to be rude to my friends by drawing this type of distinction – I myself don't mind being lesser to Anne-Sophie-sama… after all, Yuzuru-sama, even if I happen to be one of the first to call her by that honorific, I definitely won't be the last, will I? Not when Yuzuru-sama yourself is working so hard to redress the wrong done to Anne-Sophie-sama and Tono."

Kaoru hadn't attributed the cause of the grievance to anyone. The Chairman questions, "Are you lecturing me?"

"No," Kaoru says, though he doesn't include 'I wouldn't dare'. "As Yuzuru-sama is going to propose to Anne-Sophie-sama, it is clear that you want her to enjoy the prestige and power of your name and resources."

Caught off guard, Yuzuru blinks and draws back. "Whoever told you that?"

"I recognise wedding plans when I see them, Yuzuru-sama, no matter how initiatory." The piece of paper had been lying innocuously on the Chairman's desk when he'd gone pleading for help – as one with ample experience in event planning and whose family is inextricably linked with ultra glamorous festive occasions, he has an unerring eye for these things.

"Hitachiins!" Yuzuru exclaims, equal parts mirth and admiration. "Truly, Kaoru-kun, I see why your family is second to none at organising parties! Such attention to detail, such familiarity with the building blocks of these events that you can construct the big picture despite being uninformed of the situation! It would be good if you would refrain from mentioning it to Tamaki."

"Of course, Yuzuru-sama. Anyway, for it to be newsworthy, first Yuzuru-sama has to actually propose."

"What makes you so sure that I haven't?"

After a pause, Kaoru answers, "Intuition."

"Intuition?"

"That you and Anne-Sophie-sama would want to plan your wedding together after the trials you've endured. Given that the outline was sparse and one-sided, the reason for her lack of input must be that she doesn't yet know to contribute. Anne-Sophie-sama is a lot like Tono – there's no way she can keep her hands off wedding plans, they are attracted to happiness like there's a magnetic force compelling them to be in the centre of it… and from Yuzuru-sama's expression, that's precisely what captivates you about their personalities."

The Chairman is closed-eyed and grinning.

"Therefore, one day, Anne-Sophie-sama will only ever be a '-sama' – why shouldn't I refer to her as such? But maybe Yuzuru-sama might not want to propose to Anne-Sophie-sama this weekend or this coming Monday even though we will be keeping Tono out of your hair, or Tono would hail Kyouya-senpai as his lucky star or something, for being born on a day on which his parents' love story is rewarded for its perseverance."

"No, I won't steal Kyouya-kun's thunder, not to worry," he chortles gustily. "Although your idea was developed before you knew about my intention to propose, it is no less favourable to Anne-Sophie. I have no doubt that Kaoru-kun realises that, as a consequence of this, you will not be able to visit Fujioka Haruhi-kun in America?"

"Yes," Kaoru says, feeling a pang in the region of his heart. "It's all right, it can't be helped. Haruhi's school term finishes in June, Kyouya-senpai graduates in March – who knows if Ootori-sama will arrange for a wedding for Kyouya-senpai that lands in between March to June? Since we don't know if Haruhi will be able to attend, I think it's important for Kyouya-senpai to spend the holidays with his friends, including Haruhi. This is a surefire way to have the second year trip take place during its regular time slot of late January."

"Yes, it will ensure that at least half of your year level will refuse to vote to go during the actual New Year's period, however, is there a need for you to host the party in person? Its success is predicated upon a Hitachiin at the helm – we've known this for hundreds of years – if you asked Yuzuha-san – she loves you so very much, Kaoru-kun, and your grandmother has long assigned the New Year's Gala to her – I believe Yuzuha-san would agree to do it in your place, freeing you to go with your friends. I know Tamaki would want you there in America."

"Would you have me do that to my mother, Yuzuru-sama? The sheer amount of work that goes into organising this party is beyond what most people can imagine – to make her organise_ two_ of them is… heinous. It was my request, and I must take responsibility for it," Kaoru says sensibly. "Besides, it's too late for me to swap out now – I've consented to have my name billed last. This event is traditionally my family's pride and joy – Yuzuru-sama has alluded to the impact it will have upon Anne-Sophie-sama's reputation, upon her reception by our level of society; this party sets the tone for the upcoming year, it is the single event that any and all of my schoolmates will kill for a chance just to glimpse the activities – can its significance be overstated? My family name has headlined the invitation for centuries – how can I have my mother submit to the indignity of having her name pushed to the back like an afterthought? It's different for me, because I'm a generation younger and subordinate to my elders. Putting everything else aside, my mother will always be number one to me. In the end, Haruhi will come back to Japan and we'll be as close as ever, but she might have said goodbye to a Kyouya-senpai who's a bachelor and come back to one who's married… this is what I have said to Anne-Sophie-sama and Tsukishi-sama, this is how I have arranged my priorities – I will stand by them."

"… I see. Then, likewise, I will not disturb your conviction; the idea itself is extraordinary, the determination even more so – all the best, Kaoru-kun. You've made very good use of your parental contacts, haven't you?"

Kaoru suppresses a snort. "Again to be blunt, Yuzuru-sama, all of you parents are huge softies when it comes to your children. Out of your love for them, out of your intense wish for their health and welfare, there's very little that you will not agree to. That's hardly something that I can be credited with."

"Is that so? It seems to me that we have agreed to _you_," Yuzuru states incisively.

Dryly, Kaoru assures him that, "I'm not trying to profit from any of you."

"Hmm, no," Yuzuru hums cheerfully. "I must say: your approach to us is vastly different from Kyouya-kun's. Your brother was telling the truth, was he not? I recall that my son brought it up in passing that he wants to protect you so much precisely because you're constantly trying to protect others."

"H-Huh?" Kaoru stammers.

"Ahh, my son really is the most flawless judge of character!"

Kaoru says nothing, not knowing what tangent the Chairman has gone off on or the right reaction to it.

"Well," Yuzuru declares, gathering some files and depositing them in Kaoru's hands, "as I said to my son, I have in fact sorted things out for you – these should be helpful, Kaoru-kun. Let's go, I will drop you off at the Hitachiin mansion."

"There's no need for you to inconvenience yourself, Yuzuru-sama."

"Not at all. Anne-Sophie and I are going out for dinner tonight, and she is at your house right now."

_She… is?_

"Yes, so is Haninozuka-san. Of course the three of them would like to see their children's reactions to their gift – I can't wait to see, too!"


	20. Chapter 6E

**CHAPTER SIX**

**The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!**

.

"Otousan?!"

Kaoru steps out of the car – they've pulled into the Hitachiin front porch at the same time as the limousine that Hikaru and the rest of the club had taken. The Chairman had egged his driver on to drive faster, and due to the after-club clean-up, they appear to have arrived together.

"What are you doing here?! Are you getting in the way of our sleepover again?!"

Yuzuru breezes into the house. "Can't I visit Yuzuha-san? Is it a crime for me to meet my friends?"

"Huh?!" Tamaki splutters, charging in behind his father. "Why do you have to visit Yuzuha-san now?!"

"Kaoru!" Hikaru yells from where he is assembled with the others. "What the hell's going on?!"

Kaoru grins and shrugs, making his way inside eagerly.

At the entrance hall, Tamaki screeches to a halt, bottlenecking the route to the drawing room. "Kotatsu!"

Delighted, he turns around to face his assemblage of friends. "Did you prepare this for me, Kaoru?"

Yuzuru seats himself at the unoccupied kotatsu and comments, "Do you use your eyes, Tamaki? These cups have been drunk from, and there are lipstick stains at their rims."

Tamaki gasps. "Did you invite the customers to celebrate Kyouya's birthday with us?"

"Ara? Even I know that Kyouya-kun prefers small, intimate events," says a melodic, teasing voice.

"Maman?!"

"Mother?"

"Mother?! Wha – ? Dad!"

Three absurdly beautiful women enter the room from the door at the opposite end, rosy smiles on their faces. Behind them, the twins' father is carrying a laptop and an elegant metallic envelope. Unperturbed, the adults return to their kotatsu and exchange greetings with Yuzuru.

Mori and Kyouya are basically attempting to extract information straight out of Kaoru's head, and Hikaru, Honey and Tamaki have gone to join their parents to pester them instead.

"Dear, did you know that Yuzuha and I have the same favourite pâtisserie-café in Paris? We can't believe we've never met there before!" Anne-Sophie says excitedly, a fine-boned hand on her partner's forearm.

Dazed, Tamaki and Hikaru repeat, "Yuzuha…?"

"We even like the exact same thing! We always order the macarons! Oh, I go there so often, and Yuzuha says that she goes there to people-watch or get out of the atelier for some fresh air – I'm so glad we've met now, mon amie!"

"… Mon… amie…?"

Kaoru stifles a shocked laugh. He hadn't foreseen this progression either, but if their mothers are going to be great friends, who are they to interfere?

"Isn't it?" Yuzuha says happily. "To think I'm working just two streets away! We simply have to have coffee together when we're both back in Paris, Anne-Sophie!"

"And shopping!"

"And shopping! My goodness, I cannot _believe_ we have never met at any of the Sunday markets! I love the artisan craftsmanship – you have to show me your collection – I'm so thrilled – "

"No, your collection blew me away! That _lace_, heavens above, I cannot believe such – "

In harmony, Tamaki and Hikaru shout, "Believe us, we're the ones who can't believe it!"

After a beat, the parents laugh uproariously.

Kaoru slinks away, infected by their laugh but not wanting to look like he's in cahoots with them. Honestly, he has no clue as to why parents love behaving in an aggravating manner – yes, he knows part of that headiness is the pleasure of designing and executing a conspiracy, but everything else is as incomprehensible to him as it is to his friends.

Distantly, he hears Tsukishi inviting them to sit. "I've brought pastries for all of you, Mitsukuni."

In the hall, a line of servants is hauling his friends' luggage into his room. Kaoru gives them his bag, retaining his phone and clover on his person. After composing himself, he is heading back into the drawing room when a servant notifies him that another package has been delivered to the house for him.

Curious, Kaoru opens it, wondering why Hacker-san hadn't said a word about this throughout the day.

It's a massive compilation of practice exam papers for maths and science – no letter or instructions attached, nothing to identify the sender of the parcel. Lugging it into his study, he shuts the door and summons a servant to verify that the package has been thoroughly scanned – it has, and raised no warning flags unlike Hacker-san's gift – not that Kaoru thinks any Ootori would be stupid enough to send bugged mail to his residence.

He sighs heavily, flipping through the biology paper on the top of the pile. Every single set of papers is stamped with a date on the upper right-hand corner of the first page; the deeper he delves into the compilation, the later the date – the commonality is that these dates are all in the future. Obviously, these are the deadlines by which he must complete the homework fixed for him by Kiyomi. She wants him to do at least two maths and three science papers _each day_; she's crazy.

Upon closer inspection, he finds that the papers gradate in difficulty – the starting papers are meant to reconsolidate his foundation and those at the bottom of the box are the sorts that were probably done by Kyouya when he was in second year.

The staggering thoughtfulness scares him.

Kiyomi and Yuuichi defy black-and-white reasoning – or they are fantastically skilled at keeping within the murky grey areas to wrongfoot other people. Everything about them is so inexplicable; it makes Kaoru dreadfully nervous. To make matters worse, he doesn't want to bother Kyouya with these niggling concerns this weekend. He _will_ tell him… just not now.

Wearily, he punches in a number on his phone.

"Princess Michelle? It's Kaoru; sorry about just now. Yes, I think it went well with Ootori-sama – I owe you big time – you want another elephant parade when you come here?"

"No!" she nearly screams, so vehement is her protest. "No, Kaoru-kun, I should be the one promising you that I will serve as an excellent vice-president, or that I will work hard to gain sufficient votes in order that Kaoru-kun will not be ousted from your beloved club."

He chuckles. "I know: how about I repay you with food? You thought our food was divine, didn't you?"

"Kaoru-kun," she says seriously, "you've done more than enough – you've been very graceful under pressure. Kyouya-san really is blessed to have such great friends."

Her tone is… off. "What? I heard something there."

"Nothing," she hedges.

"Come on, say it, Princess Michelle. It's okay? I'm not easily offended."

She tries to divert him, and he randomly guesses, "It's fine to be anxious about your marriage? We love Kyouya-senpai, yes, but it's not like we're going to bully you by being cliquish or – "

"No, no, Kaoru-kun," she denies. "I'm not worried about that at all. I remember my time at Ouran very clearly – I have no doubt that all of you have good hearts even if I caused some friction between us last time. Um, it's just… eh, how do I put this… do you know if Kyouya-san's family is…"

He reads between the lines. "Ah. Right. Okay. Now it's my turn to be stumped at how I should put this… they can be quite… clinical, let's say? Formal and efficient."

"Do… do they love each other?"

"Woah. I… don't know? I don't think I can answer that. I _shouldn't_ answer that." Kaoru chews on his bottom lip.

"Oh. Uh. But would they… seek to harm each other? Sabotage each other?"

"You know," Kaoru tells her blandly, "I _really_ don't know this one. I'd like to know, too."

"Then, um, do you know if Kyouya-san's brother has supportive friends, too?"

Bewildered, he asks, "Which one? Why do you want to know?"

"The unmarried one."

"Akito-san? Heh. Uhhh, that guy is friendless, I think, mostly of his own doing. Has an array of complexes, in my opinion. Wait, why do you ask?"

"Kaoru-kun, is it true that Akito-san is also engaged to marry? Is his fiancée an Australian called Terri Hanigan?"

"Now I'm completely interested as to why you're interested," Kaoru says plainly. "Yes, that's right – what about it?"

Princess Michelle clears her throat. "Terri Hanigan was also at Rosey, did you know? When she graduated from secondary school, I was still in primary school, but our school's so small and… anyway, I knew who she was, and, um, she… well, she, uh… she's… not nice."

_Not nice._

_Not nice?_

"Princess Michelle, that's vague to the point of ominous. Could you, you know, be less politic?"

"I don't know!" Her voice sounds as though she's flapping her arms around in agitation. "I don't want to be bitchy if Fuyumi-san or Akito-san likes her! But – but I really don't want to be in the same family as that person! Is it possible that Fuyumi-san is sabotaging her brother by choosing this fiancée?"

"None. Zero," Kaoru answers promptly. "At least, I'm certain that Fuyumi-san loves her brothers."

"So I wondered if Akito-san has any good friends – whether Kaoru-kun can drop a hint to those friends to help Akito-san investigate Terri Hanigan properly!" There is a 'fwump' noise, like her body falling onto a bed. Her speech is muffled when she continues, "Then again, wouldn't Fuyumi-san have done her research? I thought Fuyumi-san would have; she was frighteningly perfect when she visited our palace – on the other hand, it's not like this information is in the public domain, and maybe it's not a big deal? Am I making a mountain out of a molehill, Kaoru-kun? What if Akito-san ends up hating her and their horrible relationship pollutes the peace of the entire family? No, worse! What if Akito-san is the sort of person who _likes_ her?!"

"Stop – stop freaking out, Princess Michelle," Kaoru calms her. "Akito-san is the sort of person who likes nobody. He probably – scratch that, he_ definitely_ doesn't care about getting married one way or the other. He's married to his work."

She doesn't take his advice. "That's terrible, Kaoru-kun! Terrible! People who are married to their work are all deeply unhappy people! Poor Akito-san! They are the most susceptible to people like – like – "

"Hanigan? How are people like Hanigan like, Princess Michelle? You won't tell me," Kaoru says flatly, with an edge of jest.

"Like Tamaki-san."

"What? How's that bad? Tono is awes – "

"On the outside only. Like Tamaki-san on the outside only."

It doesn't even concern him personally, yet Kaoru's heart stops at the thought of such a thing. "…What do you mean?"

"You know how when Tamaki-san says he doesn't mind, he genuinely truly really doesn't mind? Terri Hanigan _says_ she doesn't mind, and she's – "

A knock on the door interrupts them. "Kaoru?"

Jumpily and way too suspiciously, Kaoru lowers the phone when his father enters the study.

"Yeah, Daddy?"

"What're you doing in here? Everyone is downstairs; since it was your effort, we want you to be present when we announce the surprise."

"Coming, I'm coming straightaway!"

Keeping his fluster in check, Kaoru replaces the lid on his practice papers and shelves the box. When he lifts his phone to make his excuses to Princess Michelle, she's already a step ahead – she'd hung up and sent a text message that essentially boils down to, "I understand. Talk next time."

He shakes his head – he's chatting to his friend's fiancée covertly _because_ it is unknown that they are affianced, and who knew they'd actually get along when she's not being a pest and he's not being childish?

With a crease in his forehead, Yasuhiro inquires, "Are you all right, Kaoru?"

"Yup, why wouldn't I be?" Kaoru smiles reassuringly.

He troops back down with his father. Around the kotatsu, both tea and conversation are flowing liberally.

"Kaoru! Where were you?"

He accepts a cup from Mori. "Just reviewing the stuff we have to do this weekend, of course. I missed you so much, Hikaru, the minutes passed like hours!"

His friends absolutely have a gruelling interrogation in store for him, he knows it.

Tsukishi nods approvingly. "It's wonderful that Kaoru-kun has such a loving relationship with his brother. Our Yasuchika is also very attached to Mitsukuni, how he looks up to his older brother!"

All of the hosts except Honey discolour to white at the manifestly untrue assertion. Honey's expression is spirited and jaunty, resembling his mother's – Kaoru can't decide if they're being trolled.

The parents begin murmuring about their various appointments, rising from the table as the servants automatically fetch the coats. Respectfully, their children rise with them to escort them out.

Quietly, Kaoru poaches Usa-chan from Honey. He is the only person left sitting, with his knees drawn to himself and Usa-chan tucked in the gap between his torso and thighs, its pink ears protruding out to make a pillow for Kaoru's head.

"Oh! We almost forgot," Yuzuha says as if it just occurred to her, "we have a surprise for you children."

Kyouya, Honey, Mori, Hikaru and Tamaki all look in Kaoru's direction. Innocent and puzzled, Kaoru looks back. He's a far better actor than these parents – their sly smiles are such a dead giveaway.

"Oh yes," Anne-Sophie tacks on unconvincingly.

"It's for all of you, but seeing as it is Kyouya-kun's birthday on Monday, he can receive the surprise as your representative," Tsukishi calls the shots, bringing about the situation that Kaoru had hoped would happen – that Kyouya gets to open the gift.

She holds out the strikingly sleek envelope.

"Happy birthday, Kyouya-kun," the parents chorus, extremely satisfied with themselves.

With only the faintest tinge of wariness, Kyouya thanks them and reaches for it.

The three mothers bid him to, "Open it!"

Tamaki, Hikaru and Honey surround Kyouya; Mori's height advantage allows him to peek over Kyouya's shoulder. Usa-chan assists Kaoru to stay put despite his overwhelming urge to lean forward – his friends are obstructing his view.

Behind a pair of spectacles, black-grey eyes go large.

Beside Kyouya, Tamaki gasps.

Hikaru gapes. "Mother, you – !"

It's a printed copy of the first round of electronic invitations that had gone out this evening for the most exclusive party of every calendar year: the New Year's Gala. Centuries ago, it was hosted on a rotational basis by the most influential and elite families in Japan until it landed in the hands of one of the earliest Hitachiins – ever since, no other family has been able to hold a candle to the Hitachiins and eventually the party was wholly entrusted to them. This responsibility forms part of their heritage and inheritance; it is handed down linearly through the main branch of the family and is the source of the immense social power of the Hitachiins. There are families who've spent generations working towards one of these invitations to no avail, and invited families _always_ turn up – to them, this gathering fosters a sense of kinship and it is well-known that this circle of families invariably help each other before they turn to any family external to them.

This is the reason that everybody knows the Hitachiins even if the Hitachiins don't know (and don't care) about everybody. It is The Party, the one that has the first and final say regarding who's in and who's out. The incredible power wielded by the hostess is such that she is practically designing the upper-class landscape – legacy businesses have been known to fail because their current head of house offended the head of the Hitachiin family, upstart businesses have been known to succeed overnight because the owners captured the attention of the Hitachiins – it is empire games at its best… mainly because Kaoru's family is the one in charge.

Thinking about it, it'd been probably the most critical factor in Kyouya's willingness to make their acquaintance – macro-scale societal considerations come into play of course, but if the day should come where any Hitachiin should prove courageous enough to invite Kyouya without inviting his brothers, it'll have the practical effect of clinching victory for Kyouya, albeit at great cost to the Hitachiin. Organising this party amounts to servant leadership – this is the trade-off: the Hitachiins get to dictate the families in whose hands power will be concentrated in, and if any Hitachiin wants to change the status quo, she (or rarely he) is at liberty to do so by staking everything that she's got on that one bold decision. From there, one of a handful of outcomes will take place: (a) the Hitachiin gets her way if the decision is accepted, (b) it hangs in limbo, neither accepted nor rejected, and will either gain momentum or die a natural death, or (c) it is the cause of some of the most horrific murders and tragedies inflicted on Kaoru's ancestral line.

As the decision originates from a specific Hitachiin, to depose the reigning Hitachiin is to reverse the decision – there is no other involuntary method of reversal. Such is the influence of the party that decisions made about the invitees and non-invitees will stand regardless of the level of acceptance within the upper class, and vengeful families have devised numerous creative ways to get the hosting Hitachiin to recant her decision, failing which, death and a new head of the family will reset the status quo. The historical records in their family library contain some of the most epic tales around, and these biographies of important people through the ages means their collection has infinite anthropological value.

Children and youngsters below twenty are never allowed in as guests are judged purely according to their individual status, and such people tend not to have accumulated sufficient might or wealth on their own. The only exception is granted to children bearing the Hitachiin surname by birth – they are permitted to attend the party every year; this functions as their education for the day when they will take over.

And take over Kaoru will.

Neither he nor his mother is at the stage where her abdication is on the cards. What Kaoru had begged for is the opportunity to _begin_. For the coming year, they've stretched the event to cover two days: the official one on 1 January, and an ancillary one on 2 January. He recognises that he has no right to intrude upon the official adults' night – he has a long way until he can co-host with his mother, and even longer still before he can succeed her.

Therefore, the ancillary party is the decision that he's risked everything for. This inaugural event will cater to the outstanding members in his age range – no self-respecting parent will ever condone their children attending a school trip over this party, and at any rate Kaoru's peers themselves will want to attend – even the uninvited ones will languish in the hope of a last-minute invitation rather than vote for the New Year's period. If Kaoru invites his friends, they have to come; if he doesn't invite them, it's a snub of the highest degree. To avoid prejudicing his male friends, he'd designed this party as a girls-only event, getting Anne-Sophie and Tsukishi on board so that it will be one of those passing the baton and sharing wisdom type of thing. Goodness only knows how many girls and their parents are salivating at the thought of associating with the Hitachiin, Haninozuka and (for practical purposes) Suou women, and splitting a portion of the hosting power to Anne-Sophie and Tsukishi is an honour that not even Suous dare dream of.

Kaoru won't tax his mother with an encumbrance born out of something that he wants, but he's a boy and his suitability to headline a party for girls is dubious; plus, Anne-Sophie and Tsukishi will be doing the bulk of the work so he can't make them settle for less than star billing for the 'SHH… IT'S A SECRET' party: 'Suou-Haninozuka-Hitachiin', and the 'secret' is not only the contents of the ladies' discussion, but the fact that the Hitachiin in question is actually Kaoru and not his mother.

With this, they can counteract the irritating adverse effects of Haruhi's popularity and have her all to themselves for the duration of the seasonal holidays.

Having figured it out, Hikaru says slowly, "Hey… Doesn't this mean that the second year school trip…? I mean, it's mostly the girls who were pushing for the…"

Mildly, Yasuhiro informs them that, "Thirty invitations have gone out, with thirty more to go. Within an hour, the girls from Class 2-A who were invited have all RSVPed with a 'yes'."

Although it fulfils Kyouya's wish, Tamaki has the most to gain out of it. He races up to Yuzuha to grab her hands in gratitude. "Yuzuha-san, thank you! Thank you thank you thank you! Yuzuha-san really is my maman's friend!"

Both mothers laugh fondly. "But we have sons, and you can't attend the party… hmm, I wonder what you boys should do during the New Year holidays?"

"Wellll…" Tsukishi ponders, indicating the envelope, "Poor substitute for the party it may be, that's why we've had to arrange other forms of entertainment for you!"

Kyouya had been staring at Kaoru, and at Tsukishi's words, he fishes out another piece of paper.

"Mother!" Hikaru cries upon reading it. "You mean the Rhodes-Rutherfords are Haruhi's guardians?!"

Kaoru droops onto Usa-chan. He also hadn't known till this morning – small wonder that Haruhi has been getting personal makeovers. With the dates of the vacation fixed, the accommodation and other details of their trip to the US had been sorted out very quickly and a preliminary itinerary drafted.

Yuzuha sighs serenely. "Hikaru dear, given how much all of you care for Haruhi-kun, Yuzuru-san and I had to place her with locals that we have strong ties with."

"Yuzuha-san rang me to nominate her friends as soon as she found out about Haruhi-kun's scholarship," Yuzuru says with humour.

"And you didn't say anything for months?!"

More than one parent reacts with, "Ehh? It was funny!"

Anne-Sophie pats her son, who is sobbing openly. "When the boarding house closes for Christmas, Haruhi-kun and all of you will be using the Rhodes-Rutherford mansion as a home base."

"Yuzuha-saaaaan! Thank you so much! I get to see my Haruhi and my maman gets to celebrate a special New Year's Day!"

"Yes, yes," Yuzuha says graciously. "You're welcome, Tamaki-kun. Right, us adults have taken up enough of your time – we'll leave you to it now. Have fun, children!"

She kisses Hikaru, then comes up to Kaoru to kiss him. In a voice loaded with emotion, she whispers, "Sweetie."

Kaoru conveys all his thanks with his eyes.

The other parents bustle around their respective offspring as well; they exit in a hurricane of noise and activity with a dose of nagging about taking care of themselves. Their children shoo them out, waving goodbye to them at the car porch. Kaoru waits in the entrance hall, one of Usa-chan's paws in his left hand.

When they are too far away to hear him, he flicks a leaf on his clover and says, "Investigate Akito-san's fiancée."

"Remember to study! Don't distract your friends, Tamaki, you always like to play."

"Otousan! When have I not been hardworking?! Can you go, please? I'm sure Maman is hungry!"

The parents zoom off merrily.

Tamaki storms back in and sweeps Kaoru off his feet, twirling him around in a crushing hug.

"Tono! I'm not Haruhi!" Kaoru squeals, his feet back on firm ground. Tamaki does not release him. "Hey... it's okay… You won't be thanking me in a while when you realise how much grief this party is going to cause Anne-Sophie-sama. She's doing most of the work, you know, yet it's still a Hitachiin event."

"Nonsense, Kao-chan." Honey embraces him from the back. "My mother doesn't need it and she would gladly suffer for it – this will change everything for Tama-chan's mother."

"Only because Tsukishi-sama has thrown her weight behind this project as well, Honey-senpai," Kaoru mumbles against Tamaki's shirt. "When did you get so strong, Tono? I didn't think a couple of days of training with Mori-senpai could build Superman muscles."

Tamaki pulls away and looks into his eyes. "I think you've lost weight, Kaoru."

Kaoru laughs incredulously. "I don't think so! I can go on the scales to show you!"

"You probably lost all that weight running around today," Hikaru says sardonically. "Was that what you were doing, idiot? I can't believe you actually managed to set all the – heh – gears in motion in the span of an afternoon!"

"Wow, Mori-senpai, I think you have to teach Hikaru about metabolism and stuff."

Kaoru dodges his brother and hides behind Tamaki.

"Sleepover!" he cheers, darting upstairs before anyone can catch him. Apart from the fact that they outnumber him greatly, he's the youngest and the weakest, and any _one_ of them is typically sufficient to override him completely. Kaoru doesn't really want to be made to confess.

"Kaoru! Hey!"

"Aren't we behind schedule?"

In the bedroom, he rifles through the bags that the servants have placed neatly by the twins' enormous walk-in-wardrobe, unpacking the accessories that belong to him which had been loaned out for the cosplay and sorting the remainder according to where he'd gotten them from – his mother, the office, his mother's friends…

"Hikaru, where's the neckerchief?" he asks his brother when the rest of them file in. "O-Ren-san will inflict cruel and unusual punishment on me if I don't return it."

His twin kneels beside him. "Isn't it there? Try the other bag?"

"I have it, Kao-chan." Honey settles himself on the bed.

Kaoru searches in his senior's overnight bag, studiously avoiding Kyouya and Mori. The former has his arms crossed and is sitting beside Honey, the latter is leaning against a chest of drawers, and Tamaki is helping Kaoru to hang the belts on the rack.

"Have we told Kyouya-senpai what his surprise is?"

"I've been surprised enough, thank you," Kyouya replies lightly.

Kaoru falters in the act of untangling the chains.

"No, we haven't." Hikaru rolls his eyes. "Too much happened."

"Kyouya's probably guessed from the coverings on the windows," Tamaki grins.

"I have an inkling, though I cannot see how you will pull it off."

"Underestimating us, Kyouya-senpai?" Hikaru also grins – it's much more nefarious than Tamaki's.

Kyouya smirks but holds his peace.

"So Honey-senpai and I were thinking, what should we give a person like Kyouya-senpai, who has everything or knows how to obtain everything he wants? Is there anything in the world that Kyouya-senpai lacks?" Hikaru enlightens the birthday boy gleefully. "Inconceivably, there is! What do you think it is, senpai?"

Kyouya snorts derisively. With some reluctance, he says, "Sleep."

"Right you are!" Hikaru cackles. "This is going to be the tamest birthday that senpai has ever had! From now until Monday, Kyouya-senpai is only allowed to do the things that are daily necessities, and we will be studying together and going to sleep at a healthy hour everyday!"

"No."

Tamaki glides to him and says virtuously, "This is a present from the bottom of our hearts, Kyouya! Rejection is not an option!"

"I reject it entirely."

Tamaki keeps smiling goofily.

Honey, Hikaru and Kaoru are sporting identical expressions, and Mori's eyes are bright.

A minute trace of apprehension creeps into Kyouya's posture.

"…Where is my laptop?"

"In the family safe," Hikaru chirps.

"I need it for my revision," Kyouya says sharply.

None of them are fazed by it. "Doesn't Kyou-chan always print his notes out?"

"Waaaay before the exams?"

"'Cos Kyouya-senpai has long perfected them?"

"Isn't that the case? Kyouya's the most organised student in our class, that's why he tops it."

"You've brought your notes."

"Exactly, Mori-senpai. We emphasised that we will be _studying_, Kyouya-senpai. Tono and Kaoru confirmed with Tachibana-san that you've got everything you usually need to revise."

Once more, the four of them grin at him like saints.

Kyouya switches tactics. "I have business commitments that I must keep track of. Don't – "

"Isn't it wonderful that Kyouya-senpai has got Tono to handle half the responsibility for Ootori Pharmaceuticals?"

"And Tono can be so responsible when he has to be."

"I have more than the Slez Syndrome medicine on my plate!" Kyouya glares at the twins.

"Ne, Kyou-chan, Takashi and I will manage and oversee your investments – it's only a few days, isn't it, Takashi?"

Peeved, Kyouya smiles tightly at his seniors. "I wouldn't dare to bother Honey-senpai and – "

"It's no bother," Mori shuts him down.

Kaoru uses Usa-chan as a shield, pressing his almost uncontrollable laughter into those bunny ears. Kyouya is becoming increasingly alarmed as they lay out their plan – really, he's outmatched and it's just a matter of getting him to recognise it.

Kyouya takes a breath and exhales deliberately. "The aim of the blacked-out windows is…?"

"To mess up Kyouya-senpai's sense of night and day," Hikaru answers dutifully. "We'll use artificial lighting all throughout and we've removed any and all clocks in the house."

"You believe that I can be disorientated in this manner?" Kyouya demands with a strain of condescension.

Before Hikaru can say anything, Mori interjects with unshakeable confidence, "Yes."

Disbelieving, Kyouya stares at him.

The others also turn to Mori – Kaoru is intrigued; he doesn't know the finer details and it appears that Mori's guidance had been fundamental to Hikaru's scheme.

Honey elucidates on behalf of his cousin. "Unlike Takashi, Tama-chan and I, Kyou-chan cannot tell the time of the day by his level of fatigue. Years of disrupted sleep cycles means that Kyou-chan is dependent on the clock because Kyou-chan's body has lost the ability to regulate itself."

"We'd have preferred to do this over a longer period of time – it would have been more effective," Tamaki says, "but we've only got a few nights."

Mori nods solemnly. "Even so, it's enough."

"To show Kyouya-senpai that even though your mind is superb, your body is crying out for mercy," Hikaru concludes, "and that, since Kyouya-senpai is descended from a family of doctors, you should know that your health is paramount and no amount of achievement or glory will change that. This is my present to you, Kyouya-senpai: restful sleep and a taste of good health. Once the licence is approved by the EMA, your life will only get more hectic – so this is a respite, the calm before the storm, and maybe you and Tono will hold on to the memory of this weekend and remember that you'll always have us to come back to."

Kaoru gazes at his brother worshipfully. _Hikaru, you're amazing!_

Kyouya has just lost spectacularly and he knows it – he pinches the bridge of his nose and shakes his head in resignation. "Fine."

Leaping onto his brother's back, Kaoru wraps his arms around Hikaru and kisses him fervently.

"Oof! Ugh, Kaoru!"

Tamaki launches himself at the twins. "Hikaru!"

"Mori-senpai, save me!"

Mori chooses not to intervene; Kyouya goes to them and runs his fingers through Hikaru's hair. "All right, thank you. I suppose you are quarantining my phones as well? My tablet? What else?"

"Done and done. We stole your stuff when you left the clubroom – nothing that will let you do non-school-related work and nothing that will tell you the time."

Kyouya arches a devastating eyebrow and extends his left wrist.

Hikaru freezes. "Mori-senpai! You were meant to take it from Kyouya-senpai's bag!"

They'd insisted on Kaoru incorporating a steampunk watch into Kyouya's cosplay to force him to remove this item in particular – he would not have willingly given it up otherwise.

Mori pushes off from the chest of drawers.

"It's important to Kyouya," he says by way of explanation and puts out a hand, palm up. "It wouldn't have been right to take it, and you would have persuaded him."

He quirks his lips at Hikaru, a glimmer of pride in the smile. Totally awestruck, Hikaru clutches at Mori's arm exuberantly.

"Kyouya." There is no obligation in Mori's tone, only a request.

It's the correct move, Kaoru can tell – of course Mori is the person to pick up on it. Kaoru had known that Kyouya treasures the watch, and snitching it from his bag could have had any number of unfortunate repercussions. This is much better; there is no erosion of trust between them and Kyouya, and the trust might even be fortified. For all his impressive physicality, Mori is not rough – no, he is careful with people, animals, things – if there is a treasure that requires safekeeping, he is the most reliable candidate.

Kyouya blinks, mindful as always.

After several seconds, he removes his watch and hands it over.

Sword-calloused fingers close over it with a remarkable delicacy.

"Dinner!" Honey proclaims, dragging Tamaki and Hikaru with him on his way out. "We must eat now so that we will have enough time for the food to digest, then we can have a hot bath before bed! That'll keep Kyou-chan warm."

Kaoru is feeling plenty warm already. Experimentally, he sends to his senior, _What would we do without you, Mori-senpai?_

Mori does hear him!

Pleased, Kaoru plucks Usa-chan off a shelf in the walk-in-wardrobe and joins his friends in the dining hall.


	21. Chapter 6F

**CHAPTER SIX**

**The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!**

.

Flat on his stomach and in his pyjamas, Kaoru ties a black-and-gold sunflower accessory on one of Usa-chan's ears.

One metre away from him, Hikaru and Tamaki are tumbling around on the other bed.

"Aren't they suggestive?" Kaoru whispers furtively. "They bathed together again. In the same tub, 'cos when Honey-senpai and I went in, only one tub was wet and the other was dry. Do you think it's right for Hikaru to lie on Tono like that, Usa-chan?"

Beady black eyes gaze back at him.

"Well, don't look at me like that! I don't have a problem with physical intimacy! On the contrary, I love the people I touch, and touch the people I love! That's why I'm worried about Hikaru falling for Tono."

Drowsily, Kaoru rests his head on Usa-chan's belly. "Is it hypocritical of me to do this? Or is it different because you are inanimate? Maybe Usa-chan doesn't find such behaviour abnormal because you've only ever slept on people or been slept on?"

Hikaru lifts himself from where he'd been draped on Tamaki. "Oi, Kaoru, are you talking to someone?! Why're you rambling to yourself?"

"Huh? Nothing."

Honey sets the camera down on the sidetable and slides into the spot beside Kaoru with a terribly knowing air about him.

It's 9:19 pm. The four of them are lounging around, waiting for the other two of their party to come out of their baths before lights out. The twins' massive ensuite has double of everything, the halves of the bathroom mirroring the other, and they've gone through their daily ablutions two-by-two. Kyouya had gone last to retain the heat of the water for longer, and Mori had generously let the rest of them go first.

At the click of the bathroom lock, Hikaru scrambles off the bed.

By the time Mori emerges, rubbing a towel over his head amidst a cloud of humidity and fresh soap scent, Hikaru is wielding the hairdryer and comb, gesturing for him to sit at the dresser.

Kyouya strolls to the bed, his towel looped over his shoulders. "Why don't I get such service?"

"Do you _want_ such service, Kyouya-senpai?" Hikaru asks. "I do it for Mori-senpai because it makes me cry to see him use a hairdryer."

Kaoru descends into a laughing fit as Mori tilts his face upwards to give Hikaru a dull stare.

"Takashi doesn't have Hika-chan's or Kao-chan's expertise," Honey giggles. "Kyou-chan probably doesn't either."

"Completely wrong direction of airflow," Hikaru shudders. "It needs to be directed down the hair shaft from the roots to the ends! Luckily Mori-senpai usually lets his hair dry naturally and gives it lots of time to actually do that – Haruhi is the worst, I tell you, she goes to sleep even when her hair's still wet! The horror! You have to make sure she doesn't do that, Tono!"

Tamaki nods resolutely at the ceiling. "That girl – no regard for these things at all. What if she catches a cold?"

"A cold is a viral infection," Kyouya lectures, "and it cannot be contracted unless Haruhi has had contact with the virus."

Kaoru opens his mouth to say something and Kyouya gives him the evil eye. He snickers, having had this exchange with Kyouya before – and of course Kyouya has a comeback at the ready because he has been known to fall asleep with damp hair once or twice, often from sheer exhaustion, and he wakes up with headaches that behooves everyone around him to tread carefully.

"It's not right," Hikaru insists. "Hair must be diligently cared for! It's the crowning glory of a person's appearance!"

"Quite. So why don't I get such service?"

"Say 'please'."

"It's my birthday."

"Kyouya-senpai, you can be such a…" Hikaru hunts around for a less insulting word.

With a tolerant sigh, Kaoru crawls out of bed, snags his hairdryer and starts on Kyouya's hair.

"Kaoru! You totally spoil him!"

Kyouya smiles smugly.

"It_ is_ his birthday," Kaoru says placatingly. Anyway, he'd had to dry his senior's hair during the times he passed out; it's not like this is new to him.

Tamaki sits up. "Kaoru, it's not good to spoil Kyouya. Give him an inch and he'll take a yard."

"You have me confused with yourself, Tamaki," Kyouya parries pleasantly.

"Tama-chan and Kyou-chan are always pushing the boundaries."

"Are you in a position to say that, Mitsukuni?"

Kaoru cracks up helplessly – after a moment, his friends chime in.

"It's just hair, guys."

Purple eyes like transparent tinted glass, Tamaki asks, "Is it? How much have you spoilt Kyouya today, Kaoru, I wonder."

_Damn it. _Kaoru almost drops the hairbrush; Tamaki always takes him by surprise – _always_, after all these years.

Hikaru flicks off his hairdryer.

"Do you have something you want to say to us, Kyouya? Like why Kaoru suddenly reorganised the club?"

Refusing to remove the sound of his own hairdryer from the equation, Kaoru cries, "Everything that I have done, I did because _I_ wanted to, okay? I admit I should have discussed it with all of you, but, look, I found a way to solve the problem of the open interviews and I wanted to strike before news could travel and the exam hiatus was upon us so there was no time to – "

"Quiet, Kao-chan."

Kyouya reaches over and switches off the appliance at the main socket, plunging them into charged silence.

"I can show you! I have the emails from concerned parents and students who want us to reform the club under a less contentious name!" Kaoru says edgily, thankful that he had gotten Hacker-san to forge some emails as a precaution.

"Suuuure, Kaoru, it all makes sense now!" Hikaru says sarcastically. "I can't believe we didn't buy it before!"

"Hikaru, don't be a jerk," Kaoru warns. "I wanted those parents to think well of me, okay? Like you said, I'm such a suck-up, why wouldn't I make use of this opport – "

"Kao-chan, _quiet_. Out with it, Kyou-chan."

"Honey-senpai, it's true!" Kaoru asserts. "See how I got your mother and Tono's mother to benefit my family? Who knows what I can get from these – "

"Kao-chan/Kaoru!" Honey, Tamaki and Hikaru snap simultaneously.

"No!" Kaoru stands his ground even as he shrinks back. His friends are too shrewd by half – obviously they can't be fooled and Kyouya knew it, that's why he chose not to act and Kaoru is the one who put that in jeopardy yet he promised his senior that it's his secret to reveal in his own time – "No! I did it for selfish reasons and I don't want you to pry! If you don't like it you can take back the club but stop asking!"

Slightly breathless from his outburst, Kaoru stares at the carpet with his fists clenched by his sides. Morosely, he mourns, "Wasn't the point of this party for us to take things easy? How're we going to sleep now?"

"How can I take things easy when you're acting like this?" Hikaru counters. "Do you even realise you just said a bunch of crazy things?"

Tamaki targets his best friend. "Kyouya, are you really going to let Kaoru take the rap for this?"

Kyouya had been watching the confrontation, absorbing everything attentively.

"It has _nothing _to do with Kyouya-senpai!" Kaoru yells, frustrated. "Tono, will you just – "

A hand seizes his wrist. _Enough, Kaoru._

Enviably self-possessed, Kyouya returns to the task of polishing his spectacles with a corner of his towel.

"I'm sorry," Kaoru gasps, pained. "This is all my fault, isn't it? I shouldn't have – I – I panicked and I couldn't let you – this was the way that occurred to – "

"Enough," Kyouya repeats.

It is the gentleness and not the word that stuns Kaoru.

A flash of a tiny smile. "Ah, finally."

Kyouya pops his glasses back onto his face and sweeps a glance over the occupants of the room. "It was to be my last host club session today. My father thought it inappropriate for me to continue my membership in light of his ongoing matchmaking efforts and ordered me to quit. I could have concealed this from you all the way up till the beginning of the third trimester and was prepared to do so, but it seems that I no longer need to."

From their expressions, the four of them had guessed as much.

"Ootori-san no longer requires you to quit?" Tamaki double-checks.

"Yes, I can serve out my time until graduation under the new club."

_It worked!_

Kaoru wants to dissolve; he's so relieved. He should call Ootori-sama to thank him.

"And Kao-chan introduced the new club because he knew about it?"

"Apparently," Kyouya says meaningfully, scrutinising Kaoru with that invasive Ootori technique.

"Yeah, Kyouya-senpai was as shocked as the rest of us," Hikaru observes. "Meaning you didn't find out from him, Kaoru. What's going on?"

"I have no right to talk about it," Kaoru says shortly.

"Okay," Hikaru says sceptically, "I can't even describe how much I refuse to accept that, but putting it aside for now, dare I ask why Mother randomly decided to host two parties?"

"I requested; to repay Tono for destroying his club," Kaoru replies.

Annoyed, Hikaru lashes out, "That's overkill!"

_Oh_, Kaoru thinks, _of course. Shit._

To his brother he says, _Later, Hikaru. I'm sorry, trust me._

Hikaru signals his agreement using their private twin bond. Out loud, he says, "Not that I don't want to spend the holidays with Haruhi, but they just sprung the trip on us! Did you or did you not make it happen, Kaoru?"

"I did," Kaoru confirms. "I thought it would be nice?"

"_Nice_? Such extreme lengths for something 'nice'?"

"Yes! Yes, okay?" Kaoru throws his hands up in the air, spins on his heel and heads towards the door.

The five of them call his name.

"I'm going to study," Kaoru says, "since no one is interested in sleeping."

"Don't run away!" shouts Hikaru, thoroughly pissed off.

By virtue of height, Mori's strides are longer than Kaoru's – he overtakes him and stations himself at the exit, bottom pressing against the door to keep it shut and arms crossed grimly.

Levelly, Kaoru closes his eyes and becomes hollow and still like the dead, asking, "You really want to fight?"

It sparks Hikaru's ire instantly. "I hate it when you do that!"

Tamaki goes to him to soothe him, attempting to arrest any escalation in the rising antagonism.

"He does that, Tono! Like he's not to blame when he's all, 'if you want a fight I'll give you one' and he goes all silent and sad like it's my fucking problem and I should just fucking deal with it! It drives me mad!"

Hurt and anger are plain in Hikaru's voice – it causes an agonising twinge in Kaoru's heart and makes him want to relent. He can feel himself softening towards his brother, and he turns around to go to him, to apologise. To his surprise, Kyouya is there too, brushing Hikaru's fringe back and whispering something to him to ameliorate his tempestuous emotions.

Kaoru doesn't want to analyse that very real flare of jealousy at the sight. Of who, for what, he doesn't know. His unstyled hair cascades around his face loosely when he lowers his head, obscuring him from the world.

"Shh… I asked for the holidays with Haruhi, Hikaru," Kyouya confesses lowly – it carries through the noiseless room. "All right? As I thought I'd have to leave the club, I wanted to go on vacation with all of you and the second-year trip would have interfered with that. I had no idea that Kaoru knew about the other relevant details and he must have deduced my true motives, resulting in this current situation."

Kaoru senses his brother's eyes on him but he doesn't raise his head.

"Kyouya-senpai stood there all day today, knowing it was your last day, and you didn't say anything?" Hikaru calls him out on it. "If it wasn't for Kaoru, you would have left us and we would be completely unaware. Why are the both of you such idiots?"

Kyouya looks at Hikaru, amused by the insolence.

"Exactly," Mori seconds the sentiment.

"Yes," Tamaki concurs exasperatedly. "If you'd only said it, we would've understood. We understand _now_. Isn't it because you want us to enjoy this weekend, that's why neither of you brought it up?"

"And even when the game was up, Kyou-chan and Kao-chan kept resisting?"

Kyouya sighs. "Like Hikaru, I was trying to create a perfect memory."

"Unlike Hikaru," Mori dissents.

"Isn't it, Takashi? Kyou-chan's memory comes at the expense of your pain now and our guilt later."

Kyouya never wastes his energy on battles that will end in certain defeat. "I'm sorry. There's still time for it to be perfect?"

Soberly, Tamaki says, "Kyouya, look at Kaoru."

Somewhat irked by that doggedness, Kaoru says with a hint of brazen pizzazz, "What? You lot have given Kyouya-senpai a slap on the wrist and he's apologised, so isn't everything fine? Now that the story's come out, can we go to bed?"

The amusement is back in full force – this time shared by all five of them.

"… What?" Kaoru asks cautiously, backing away a little.

Instead of answering him, Kyouya marches up to him and takes his hand. "Whatever the time is, I suspect Honey-senpai must be tired. Go to sleep, all of you. Kaoru and I are going to have a quick chat about how he found out – he's probably afraid to publicly admit that he's been snooping through my affairs – no, Hikaru, nothing untoward will happen to him – and we will return after he has given me a full account. Please don't make me sleep beside Tamaki or Hikaru; I'd like to wake up without bruises. Otherwise, goodnight, everyone."

Kaoru is led out of the bedroom amidst a cheery symphony of, "Goodnight!"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

In the corridor en route to wherever Kyouya is bringing them to, Kaoru digs his heels in.

Kyouya tightens his grip.

"Please don't make me tell you," Kaoru pleads. "I'd fully intended to, and I _will_, but not this weekend."

Kyouya pulls him along adamantly. "Did you hear nothing of what Honey-senpai said? I don't want to be blissfully ignorant only to regret it subsequently."

"I want you to be happy!"

Abruptly pausing, Kyouya smiles with a rare warmth. "You've made that abundantly clear today. Unfortunately, this implies that I will be made unhappy by the truth, making it more imperative than ever that I know it."

Kaoru curses at himself mentally. _Careless, too careless._

"Don't do that," he admonishes. "You've been tormenting yourself since club."

"I was worried you'd be angry," Kaoru says despairingly.

"Angry?" Kyouya questions, rich and velveteen. "Are you looking at me properly?"

Kaoru actually ducks his head instinctively. "More like I can't bear to look."

"… In case I happen to be angry?" Kyouya laughs, and Kaoru scowls at him.

Very seriously, Kyouya forces him to meet his gaze. "I _was_, I'm sorry, and thank you. You and Hikaru have given me priceless gifts."

Kaoru smiles tentatively. "Really?"

"Really."

A lovely feeling unfurls in the pit of Kaoru's stomach. He has the strangest urge to giggle like someone with an adolescent crush.

"Now, oblige me further?"

Kaoru huffs. "You, Kyouya-senpai, are a conniving, villainous lowlife."

"Am I? I like the two adjectives, however I cannot see how the noun is applicable to me."

With mild incredulity, Kaoru stares at him before deciding it's not worth it to argue. Their roles reversed, Kaoru steers them to the study and fetches the box.

"Kiyomi-san gave these to me."

Kyouya immediately goes on high alert. "Why? When? Tell me everything."

He does, relating the events in as much detail as he can. When he finishes his tale, he can tell that he's essentially smashed his senior's sense of peace despite the lack of outward reaction.

Deep in thought, Kyouya rifles through the practice papers.

On impulse, Kaoru reaches out miserably to smooth his frown. "I regret telling you already."

Kyouya catches his hand. "Next time, tell me without delay. Understand? _Without delay_. Pick up the phone, send an email, come to my class – whatever works."

"Okay."

"Do you want to be tutored by Kiyomi-neesan?"

"No!" Kaoru hurriedly denies. "It's… excruciating. Like walking on eggshells. Knife-edged eggshells. Barefooted."

Kyouya arches an eyebrow. "That bad? You did say that she refined your understanding of the scientific and mathematical concepts."

"Yeah, um," Kaoru winces.

"Say it."

"Kiyomi-san is brilliant, but, you know, at the same time she works on my weaker subjects, she and Yuuichi-san kind of – well, tear down my stronger subjects. It doesn't matter though, it's probably just a strategy."

Kyouya's eyes widen. "How?"

"It's nothing, Kyouya-senpai. I know better than to internalise it, so – "

"Kaoru, what did I say not five seconds ago? _Tell me_."

"They just, I guess, dissect all of my work in the languages and humanities, and… compare me to Tono for every single assignment."

It's not quite alarm reflected back at Kaoru, but there's definitely unease.

"Presumably arriving at the opinion that Tamaki is superior?"

Kaoru nods. "More or less."

Kyouya is rather pale – originally Kaoru assumes it is due to this disquieting news, and it is only when he sees his senior's white-knuckled hands that he realises it is fury.

"It's really okay, Kyouya-senpai," he says consolingly.

"It is _not_ okay," Kyouya replies curtly. "You outscored me in English; how dare they devalue your work to get to me."

Kaoru grins. "Don't let it get to you, senpai."

Dourly, Kyouya tosses the papers back into the box. "Do them anyway, they're good for you. I'll find a way to remove you from their clutches."

"Yes, Kyouya-senpai," Kaoru says like marshmallow coated in sticky candy, trying to appease him. "I suppose I must be extremely special if an attack on me can incur Kyouya-senpai's wrath."

He chuckles. "That tone is still ineffective."

"Really?" Kaoru asks teasingly.

"Really."

"You're awful to me," Kaoru says bluntly. "I don't know why I bother. At least Honey-senpai pretends to fall for it."

Kyouya's eyes darken with mischief. "It's because I'm _extremely special_."

Affronted, Kaoru stalks back to their bedroom with their resident evil overlord trailing behind him, emanating an aura of schadenfreude.

Stealthily entering the room, they find Honey snug under the blankets on Kaoru's bed, Mori slumbering like a plank of wood beside him, and Tamaki and Hikaru in a contented sprawl across the remaining space.

"My, my," Kyouya sighs.

"It's possible to arrange Hikaru's limbs without waking him," Kaoru whispers, climbing up where the two beds meet and squeezing himself into the small void between Mori and Hikaru to demonstrate the veracity of his claims. He straightens Hikaru out and heaves him closer to Tamaki, hoping that Tamaki doesn't get kicked off in the middle of the night by Hikaru like Kaoru was.

"Not so much Tamaki." Despite that, Kyouya proceeds to make his best friend less of a starfish. Tamaki does rouse marginally, regains a decent degree of consciousness to haul Hikaru in his direction and knocks himself out again, mumbling something incomprehensible about homemade onigiri to Kyouya.

Kyouya circles around to place his spectacles on the table beside Honey instead of the one beside Tamaki. They wriggle under the covers, Kaoru taking Hikaru's other side as Mori is the ideal bed companion for people with low blood pressure.

Excessively thrilled, Kaoru fends off the approach of sleep to savour the experience of being cocooned with five of the most precious people to him, his high spirits dampened only when Hikaru drops/smacks an arm on his abdomen.

Kaoru twitches and squeaks, biting back a yelp.

In the dim light, he can see Kyouya smirking insufferably. In response, he scrunches his features into a sad pout.

With a rustle, Kyouya lifts the blankets in invitation.

"Really?" Kaoru mouths.

_Really._

He worms his way in beside Kyouya, joining his seniors in their safe harbour. Even overpopulated, it's likely he'll sleep better in this bed. Lying on his right, he studies Kyouya until Kyouya brushes a hand over his eyelids to compel him to close them.

There is a moment right before Kaoru drifts off where he thinks he must have hallucinated cool fingers skimming across his cheek.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

The hosts are very unashamed about sharing a bath, room, etc. because of several reasons: (a) as they do cosplays regularly, I assume they change together very often and would have seen everything there is to see already; (b) they are all extremely attractive individuals with very high self-esteem and confidence in their physical appearances; (c) the onsen/hot springs culture in Japan is very strong even to modern day, and members of the same biological sex often soak in the same onsen together – clothing is typically not allowed _at all _(meaning nude), and people have only a small handkerchief-sized washcloth with them. Of course modesty and shyness exists everywhere even for countries with a communal bath culture, but – come on, the _hosts_?

:D

So close. So, so close...


	22. Correspondence: Haruhi

**CORRESPONDENCE: HARUHI**

**No Remedy for Love**

.

_(New England, United States of America)_

Along with three other people – Gale is her senior, Caius is her classmate and Felicity is her junior – Haruhi climbs out of the chauffeured car to be enthusiastically greeted by a woman who _really _resembles her best friends' mother in mannerisms.

"Thank you for having me over, Mrs Rhodes-Rutherford," she politely thanks the lady of the house, her official listed guardian for the duration of her exchange and the person who totes her around like a personal Barbie doll.

"You Japanese," tuts Blythe Rutherford, shaking her head kindly at Haruhi before kissing her children. "How many times have I said it's okay to call me 'Blythe'? It makes me wonder if you secretly take offence when I call you 'Haruhi'."

"No, no," Haruhi denies quickly, following her into the mansion. "I understand that this is how it is done in America, Mrs Rhodes-Rutherford, even if I'm unused to calling people so familiarly."

The porter brings her overnight bag in and hands it to a servant who will place it in the room that has been designated as hers during the weekends that she joins her guardian family in their home. It's Friday after school, meaning that they'd typically have a sumptuous dinner before truckloads of clothing are unloaded on Haruhi for her to try on. As this happens after food, when she is on a full stomach, her objections are not as vigorous as they could have been.

After the meal, Blythe Rutherford wipes her mouth on the napkin daintily. "Today, Haruhi, we're changing things up a little."

She has this… gleam in her eyes that reminds Haruhi of a Hitachiin.

"Is… is that so, Mrs Rhodes-Rutherford?" Haruhi asks weakly, accustomed to the peculiarities of her hostess.

"Yes," answers Asher Rhodes, getting up from the table and bringing Haruhi to the study. He glances at the clock on the wall – 8:02 pm – and boots up the computer. "Sit down, child, sit."

After a few clicks, Haruhi hears a voice that brings a lump to her throat.

"Asher! Thanks for letting us do this!"

With a giant smile, Asher Rhodes says, "You're welcome – is this Hikaru or Kaoru?"

"Hikaru," Haruhi says at the same time as her friend.

"Haruhi!" he shouts as Mr Rhodes-Rutherford turns the screen to her.

_That face. _

Haruhi misses them so much, it is a hole in her heart.

"Hikaru will tell you the surprise that we've got for you," says her host, clasping her shoulder genially. "I'll leave you to it."

"Haruhi! We're going there this December and spending Christmas and New Year with you so you won't feel lonely we miss you so much how are you doing my god that dress you're wearing is awesome why don't you wear this stuff in front of us we're having a sleepover 'cos it's Kyouya-senpai's birthday even though exams are next week and it sucks but WE'RE GOING OVER SOON TO MEET YOU!" Hikaru babbles in a chain of rapidfire Japanese.

Before Haruhi can respond, a blond-haired blast of energy bounds onto the screen. "Haru-chan, Haru-chan, we miss you so much!"

Another blond takes over. "HAAAARUUUUUHIIIIIIIII MY HARUHI HOW ARE YOU I LOVE YOU I MISS YOU I – "

Suddenly, her eagerness to see them is significantly less than it was.

"Quiet!" she yells, twisting the volume knob on the speaker system in order not to disturb the neighbourhood.

They obey.

"I'm happy to see all of you, too," she says sincerely. "Is it morning there?"

Three heads bob up and down frantically; another head crams itself into the frame.

"Hello, Mori-senpai."

"Gaaaahn! Why does my Haruhi only – "

The taciturn senior smiles at her; it never fails to make her happy. "Ranka-san is doing well."

"Thank you, Mori-senpai," she says gratefully. "I hope you're all having fun on your sleepover – is Kyouya-senpai still asleep?"

"Duh," Hikaru says, swatting Tamaki for wailing loudly, "but it's only 9 and the point is to let him sleep his fill, so."

"We're also in the study, Haru-chan!" Honey quips, plastering his rabbit against the webcam such that Haruhi is treated to a view of limitless pink. "Did you know that Yuzuha-san is friends with Haru-chan's guardian family? That's why we're all going to stay at their mansion! Usa-chan is so excited!"

"Haruhi!" Tamaki dominates the screen next, leaning in close enough that she can see his pores. "How have you – "

"I'm doing well too, Tamaki-senpai," she cuts him off before he goes on a roll. "Everyone has been incredibly friendly to me; the school is great and living in this culture is a whole new experience! My classmates have brought me around the city and I have a list of favourite food places that I want to bring you to. How are you, Tamaki-senpai? All of you? Hikaru, study hard for your exams, okay?"

Three of them start talking over each other to give her an answer – she deciphers most of it nonetheless.

"Yes, I see. I'm glad to hear that. Where's Kaoru?"

To her surprise, the four of them exchange muted looks of concern.

"What? What's happened to Kaoru?" she asks with a spike of worry.

"Nah, nothing's _happened_," Hikaru says, not dismissive enough to allay her fears, "and nothing'd better happen."

Honey sighs. "Kao-chan's still asleep too."

"He's trying too hard, Haruhi," Tamaki confides, and Mori nods.

"That's Kaoru though, isn't it?"

"It's worse now," Hikaru snorts. "Hard to believe, I know."

"Are – " Haruhi muses, "Are we helping him? Is there a way I can help?"

"Tell Kao-chan that Haru-chan is thinking of him!" Honey grins.

"I am," she says honestly. "I have been thinking of all of you. I'll send more emails?"

Plaintively, Tamaki begs, "Send more emails to me too, Haruhi!"

"Yes, yes," she acquiesces easily. "I've been busy with a debate competition, Tamaki-senpai; sorry for neglecting your calls."

"Debate?!" three voices demand.

"Mr and Mrs Rhodes-Rutherford recommended that I should become involved with debating when they found out that I wanted to do law," Haruhi informs them. "They said that the lessons would help me to improve my English and oratory skills. I'm still not very good and I get extremely nervous, but I'm really enjoying it! Some of these people are so amazingly eloquent – even when I didn't think I'd agree with them, by the end of their argument I was swayed. I had no idea that speech could be so powerful; no wonder why my father always went on and on about my mother's way with words. I think the Rhodes-Rutherfords are right, Tamaki-senpai – I want to improve my ability to express myself so that I can be more professional in my communication with the court or with clients."

Tamaki looks at her tenderly, brimming with pride. "I'll support you in anything, Haruhi."

"Yay, Haru-chan!"

"Go, Haruhi! There've been some major changes at our end, too! Listen, our club's gonna – "

.

Notes

There is no remedy for love but to love more. – Henry David Thoreau


	23. Chapter 6G

**CHAPTER SIX**

**The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!**

.

Like a balmy spring breeze, someone murmurs against his ear, "Kao-chan."

Kaoru crumples in on himself, making contact with a warm… body?

Gently easing away, he ends up touching another body.

When he remembers the identities of his bedmates, his eyes fly open.

Usa-chan stares back.

Over the top of those rabbit ears, Honey is beaming at him, a finger on his lips to signal that Kaoru should scrupulously regulate his actions and sounds.

… Meaning that the person pressed up against his back is none other than the Low Blood Pressure Evil Lord.

Kaoru winces, inching forward with the feline grace that he and his brother are famous for. He clears the obstacles and manages to get himself standing on the thick carpet before relaxing his coiled muscles. Honey grasps the headboard with one hand and backflips off the bed in one clean movement, without jarring the occupant at all and landing beside Kaoru as noiselessly as though the floor is made out of cotton wool.

Highly impressed, Kaoru blows a kiss at him before going to the bathroom.

After a light breakfast, he lazes around with his friends in one of the private, family-use lounge rooms. Textbooks and papers spread out around them, they begin revising their own schoolwork with occasional queries directed at their respective older seniors. Tamaki and Kaoru have the same strengths and weaknesses, making them at once useful and useless to each other – they correct each other's work in the languages and humanities, adding their literary flair on top of the other person's while keeping their hands off the other person's maths and science entirely.

Hikaru gloats at being able to mark Tamaki's mathematics paper for him and they squall at each other to their hearts' content, during which Kaoru consults Mori on his geography notes – before the sleepover, he'd compiled them and requested that Mori go through them to ensure that he hasn't made any errors. Unselfish as always, Mori had pasted post-it notes with additional information at the lacking areas, and Kaoru wants to clarify that he has made the right amendments.

With an intense focus that blocks out the world, Honey is blazing through his notes for university with his trusty set of highlighters. Kaoru has always loved observing Honey when Honey is studying – there is an undeniably captivating cleverness that surfaces in these moments. His senior doesn't take well to being disturbed – about as well as he handles being awoken, actually – which is really all that needs to be said about the depth of his concentration. It's fine for people to buzz around him but not to intrude on his bubble, which is why Honey has a coffee table all to himself.

Mori is sharing with Hikaru and Kaoru is sharing with Tamaki – they scratch away at their papers industriously for a couple of hours before the first stirrings of hunger make them drop their pens. Kaoru hadn't eaten much and the other four had risen early; Tamaki wants them to picnic out in the lawns under the sun and the plan had been to wait for Kyouya to wake naturally, but… Kyouya's sleep debt is so huge that he is basically bankrupt.

They sneak a peek at the watch that Hikaru has stashed away in his pocket – it is a quarter to one and perfect for lunch. Bracing themselves for an encounter with a member of the netherworld, they poke their heads back into the dark bedroom, Kaoru switches on a dim lamp in the far corner that they'd prepared for this purpose and they crawl onto the bed in a formation that surrounds its lone occupant.

"Kyouya," Tamaki calls brightly, rumpling his best friend's hair.

Lying by the foot of the bed, Hikaru snakes his arms under the blanket to massage Kyouya's legs. "Wake up, Kyouya-senpai."

Honey rests on the lump that is Kyouya, putting Usa-chan on him.

"Nngh," Kyouya says unwillingly, threateningly.

Mori settles himself beside Honey, patting Kyouya with one large hand. "Kyouya."

Kyouya pulls the covers over his head. "Early."

Kaoru crosses his legs underneath him, grinning.

"It's not, Kyouya," Tamaki wheedles, trying to squirm into the blankets himself to extract his friend.

"Yes, Kyou-chan, time to wake up."

"We promise you'll get to sleep early tonight," Hikaru cajoles him.

Eventually, Kyouya opens his eyes to glower at them. "What's the time?"

Nobody tells him.

Kyouya harrumphs and plonks back onto his pillow.

Tamaki smiles indulgently. "Kyouyaaaa."

"Wake up, senpai." Hikaru scrambles up to shake the bundle of fabric that Kyouya is swaddled in. "Come on, we've already refrained from waking you in an annoying way."

"The very act of waking me is annoying," Kyouya snipes. He's less barbed than he could have been, which probably indicates his awareness that they've let him sleep in.

After a good fifteen to twenty minutes, they close the bathroom door on a still-out-of-it Kyouya, and after an additional ten to fifteen minutes, they are dashing and bouncing out into the gardens for their midday meal.

It's French-style today, courtesy of Tamaki's influence: bread, sandwiches, cold meats, fruit, wine.

When Tamaki passes the cheese board to Kaoru, Kaoru asks curiously, "Hey, Tono, how did you not get booted off the bed by Hikaru?"

Tamaki slants his head to the left. "Wasn't there enough space?"

"No, your position was fairly precarious." Kyouya accepts a glass of red from Hikaru.

"Huh? Hikaru and I were very comfortable, weren't we?"

Hikaru nods.

"Oh, I get it," Kaoru says flatly. "So it's just me you don't want to share a bed with."

"What?!"

"Tama-chan and Hika-chan were hugging each other!" Honey tosses in blithely. "Maybe that's why?"

"So you don't want to hug me." Kaoru collapses on Mori woefully.

Outraged, Hikaru says, "Why're you complaining, you had Kyouya-senpai!"

"I want my Kao-chan," Honey wails as Mori offers a piece of cheese to him. "Why does Kyou-chan get Kao-chan?"

"I don't know what everyone's talking about," Kyouya says, selecting a sandwich. "It's too early for this nonsense."

The sun is hanging in the middle of the sky and Kyouya is definitely passable in basic astronomy; the rest of them pay no heed to his grumpiness.

"We got the servants to put twelve blankets on the beds 'cos Tono thinks I'm a blanket-hogger? Two per person? Why was Kaoru with you?"

"Because I needed four layers."

"Hah?! Isn't that suffocating? They were duvets!"

"Kao-chan goes motionless under four layers," Honey says approvingly. "It's very nice, Hika-chan."

"Poor Kaoru!" Tamaki exclaims. "Kyouya, you made him sleep under that crushing weight so that you would be warm?! You could've taken one of mine!"

"It's not crushing."

"It's not, really," Kaoru agrees. "Ah, I see – Hikaru, you were hugging Tono because Tono produces a lot of heat, right? Like Mori-senpai."

"I don't even know if I was hugging him!"

"You were," Tamaki tells him. "It was cute."

Hikaru splutters wordlessly.

Urgently, Kaoru turns away and finds something to discuss with Honey. Poker-faced, Mori and Kyouya watch as Hikaru recovers and attempts to make Tamaki pay for his remark. Over the sounds of a gruesome slaughter, Kaoru asks Honey what sort of toys he would like to see or would like to have a hand in their creation in order to make his dreams reality.

His senior has evidently ruminated long and hard on this topic, and they have a discourse about it with contributions from Mori and Kyouya – that those other two seniors know quite so much about Honey's vision for a toys and games empire reveals more to Kaoru than they are aware, but Kaoru is ill-inclined to let the cat out of the bag until tomorrow. As there is school on Monday, the actual day of Kyouya's birthday, and they would have a limited amount of time to ready themselves in the morning, they've decided that Sunday will be the substitute for the celebration.

Speaking of cats, Team Kyouya has requested – and Kaoru has agreed – that they should also present their gifts to their master on Sunday; they will be coming along in the afternoon and Kaoru's camera is poised to immortalise the scene of Kyouya-meeting-kitten for posterity's sake.

"Kaoru!" Hikaru rushes back from where he'd been chasing Tamaki and grabs his arm. "Tono's a pervert!"

"Is that news?" Kaoru says together with Kyouya.

"Just now! He told me he imagines Haruhi's sleep habits!" Hikaru alleges. "No wonder he was molesting me all night! We can't let him go to America, he's thinking about _that_ – "

Overwrought, Tamaki hurtles back onto the picnic mat and flips out at Hikaru. "NO! I wasn't! Stop twisting my words! I said it's interesting how much we learnt about each other from last night alone!"

Totally blasé, Kaoru asks, "Was Tono molesting you?"

"Did Hika-chan like it?" Honey just_ has_ to chuck in for good measure. Too late to be preventive, Mori says, "Mitsukuni."

Hikaru and Tamaki go ballistic on their diminutive senior.

"Hush, hush." Kaoru slings an arm around each of the two loose cannons. "Honey-senpai likes asking questions because he has an unquenchable thirst for knowledge. Don't begrudge him that."

"Kaoru," Hikaru sobs, batting away one of Honey's flowers.

"Don't cry, Tama-chan," Honey says, feeding some fruit to him.

_Honey-senpai, stop baiting them._ Kaoru rolls his eyes pointedly.

Honey grins widely. "There, there, Hika-chan."

"Yes, Hika-chan," Kaoru echoes, hoisting his brother up. "Let's go get dessert? Ice cream makes everything better."

"Ice cream!" Honey cheers.

Stretched out in the shade and sipping his wine languidly, Kyouya shakes his head at their antics as Kaoru slips into the house after his brother.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

In the dining hall after issuing instructions to the servants, Kaoru steps into Hikaru's arms and holds him dearly.

"I get it, Hikaru," he says lovingly. "Okay? I get it, I'm sorry."

Hikaru exhales heavily and wilts against him.

"It – it's not that I don't love Tono or Kyouya-senpai," Hikaru says into Kaoru's shoulder. "I just – _god_ – it – "

"Rankles," Kaoru supplies understandingly. "_I know_, Hikaru."

"Then?!" Hikaru demands. "The party, Kaoru! _The_ party! How could you?"

"It's still ours," Kaoru assures him despite the roiling in his gut. "I made sure it's still ours, Mother made sure it's still ours – it's a Hitachiin event through and through. No doubt Anne-Sophie-sama will discover that if she doesn't already know it, and Tsukishi-sama is… Tsukishi-sama. A Haninozuka. She'll never assume we're sharing the party permanently and she knows better than to try to take it. Tsukishi-sama is like Honey-senpai, she just likes tagging along for the hell of it, and to be honest, she won't let the party fall into the hands of a Suou because they wield enough power as it is."

"Was that why you got Haninozuka-sama on the bandwagon?" Hikaru asks, eyes downcast.

"No," Kaoru laughs, "I'm not nearly canny enough to think of all of that. Mother did – I called her first, and she told me to get Tsukishi-sama as a safeguard."

"Are you trying to kill Mother? _Two_ parties?" Hikaru says with conspicuous temper. "You know, that's what really rubs me the wrong way – I love our friends, true, but I love Mother too! It's great for Grantaine-san to gain more recognition in our society, but putting her before Mother? Really? I can't see why her name should go first; if it's Haninozuka-sama I might swallow it – damn, does Grandmother agree to this?! She was close to Honey-senpai's grandmother and even then they never encroached on each other's territory! Kaoru, this is – is – _psychotic_! It's completely unreasonable!"

"Hikaru," Kaoru says, and kisses him silent.

Hikaru's hand comes up to his jaw, tilting his head so that their mouths fit better.

They stay there, fused into one person and breathing the same air. Kaoru's skin tingles with the proximity of his twin, knowing that his body will convey his apology far better than any verbal expression can.

Hikaru buries his face in Kaoru's neck. "I don't want Mother to go last. I don't want people to think that Grantaine-san is more outstanding than Mother, or that Mother has to give way to them. I know Mother would say yes because she loves us, and that only makes me hate it more."

_I know that too, Hikaru, that's why…_

"Grandmother knows, all right? We'll work it out somehow," Kaoru vows. "I'm so sorry. I've overlooked how horrible it is to, um – you know, you in particular… How it would seem to have Tono and his family come first in everything – "

Very cynically, Hikaru laughs. The sound is grating.

"Don't beat the hornet's nest, Kaoru. I'm still human, unlike Mori-senpai," he says self-deprecatingly. "Unlike you as well, you're amazing. Anyway, I'm happy now and that's enough. Hey, actually, why don't I stay behind and host the second party instead?"

Shocked, Kaoru grabs his brother and pushes him back to stare into his eyes.

"I mean, why not?" Hikaru shrugs. "Then Mother doesn't have to put up with it."

"You – you can't!"

"Why not?" Hikaru says again. "Kyouya-senpai doesn't have to quit anymore, right? No need for a 'host club forever' trip. Tono's probably busy with business and he'll want to spend that time with Haruhi – no point fighting with him for it."

"Oh, Hikaru," Kaoru gasps. He's miscalculated on a monumental scale.

"Don't do that," Hikaru says, cozying up to him. "It's not what you think; I'm not going to be depressed from seeing them together. Relationships need time and effort – look, Kaoru, if it were you and Haruhi or you and anyone else, I'd also back off so you can have those coupley-coupley moments, no?"

"But you have to go! The others will be there; it makes no difference!"

"Kyouya-senpai surely wants to tour the universities and Mori-senpai and Honey-senpai can do whatever it is they do – other than hanging out with you, I'll just get in the way. Yeah! I should host the party! This is beginning to sound more and more – "

Hikaru stops abruptly.

He narrows his eyes.

"The '_others_'?"

_Shit._

"_You're_ the Hitachiin," he breathes, thunderstruck. "On the invitation, that's _you_."

Kaoru covers his face with his hands.

"I _thought_ it was weird!" Hikaru rages, gripping Kaoru's arms and rattling him. "You're more considerate than me; you'd never do this to Mother! Kaoru, you _idiot_! You – you are the _king_ of idiots! The Emperor!"

"Don't tell them!" Kaoru begs. "Please, _please_ don't tell them, Hikaru! Please! Everyone has to go on this trip! It's – "

"Everyone?! _Everyone?!_" Hikaru tears into him. "What are you, a ghost?! Furniture?! Some kind of non-entity?! What. The. Fuck. Kaoru."

Kaoru opens his mouth; his brother drops him and strides away.

"I can't even." Hikaru leaves the hall.

Kaoru panics badly, running out to stop him.

Hikaru struggles away from him. "Don't. _Don't_, Kaoru. I can't remember the last time I was so furious."

"Hikaru, please!" Kaoru repeats that one word over and over, stubbornly clinging onto his twin. "Please. Please."

"Why? Give me one good reason. One."

Kaoru shakes his head hopelessly. "Please."

"No deal." Hikaru brushes him aside, heading towards the gardens.

"Stay with me!" Kaoru throws himself at his brother. "Forget it – forget what I said – you can stay and host the party with me. Just let the rest go, please."

Hikaru had caught him automatically, unable to let him fall to the ground.

"Remember?" Kaoru clutches his lapels. "Remember how we always said we'd host this party together? Remember how we looked forward to it as children? I broke my promise, I'm despicable and I know it. Please, Hikaru. I want this – let me have it?"

"You – why the hell do you look like you're going to cry? Huh? Kaoru, why?!"

Kaoru hugs him stupidly.

"You're scaring me," Hikaru says shakily. "You've been scaring me for a while."

"Host the New Year's party with me, okay? I'm sorry I didn't think of how you'd feel about the Suous and stuff – if it sucks for you to go to America and – yeah we can't do that to Mother and I was never going to, so please, host the party with me."

"Fine, I will," Hikaru gives his assent immediately. "It's our family's business and I'd already wanted to. Now will you tell me what's going on?"

"It's not mine to tell."

"Believe me, I understand that," Hikaru says grimly, "because I also have secrets that I haven't been telling you. How does it feel on the other side?"

Stung, Kaoru reels back.

Hikaru lets out a bark of corrosive laughter.

"Not nice, huh." Hikaru shepherds him into the nearest room and pushes him down onto whatever available seat before turning away, ostensibly to continue walking back to their friends.

"Hika – !"

"Sit there," he commands. "No, I won't tell the others. Yet. Sit there and trust me."

_Trust me like I trust you._

Feeling like a bomb has detonated inside him, Kaoru lowers himself onto the lounge chair and waits.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Hikaru returns with Kyouya.

Without further ado, he seizes one of Kaoru's wrists and takes hold of Kyouya with his other hand. They navigate the house and come to the twins' old hideout, where Hikaru ushers them both in. The place is notoriously difficult to find and they haven't permitted many people to enter over the years – Hikaru fastens the lock and they are alone.

"I told Tono we're playing hide-and-seek. Mori-senpai will know to stop him from freaking out when he can't find us."

Once more, Hikaru pushes Kaoru to sit, this time on the bed.

"Kyouya-senpai, I'm asking you to please tell me what Kaoru isn't telling me," Hikaru requests without beating around the bush.

With raised eyebrows, Kyouya sits down beside Kaoru and crosses his legs.

"Hikaru – "

"Shut up, Kaoru," he says brusquely.

To their senior, he elaborates, "Yesterday night, Kyouya-senpai, you actually came up to me to tell me the reason for that New Year's party. I wondered why senpai was being, for lack of a better word, _nice_ – it was obvious, really – Kyouya-senpai is smart as a tack, you of all people understand what Kaoru did by enlisting Grantaine-san and Haninozuka-sama to organise the party, you of all people picked up on the fact that I was upset, and since it was done for senpai, you thought I – a Hitachiin – deserved an explanation, didn't you?"

Faintly amused, Kyouya nods.

"If that's the case, will Kyouya-senpai tell me why Kaoru thinks it's so important for all of us to holiday with Haruhi? You aren't quitting the club anymore, why is it a big deal? It is your secret he's keeping, isn't it? I haven't guessed wrongly?"

"You haven't," Kyouya concedes.

"Okay," Hikaru heaves a sigh. "Even though I recognise Kyouya-senpai's right to choose who to tell your problems to, would you be willing to tell me this time? Kaoru is scaring me."

Kyouya cuts a glance at Kaoru. "I can only speculate, but I surmise it is because my father is marrying me off at the end of the school year."

Kaoru gawks at him – he'd come out with it like water from a tap!

Hikaru inhales sharply. "You mean it's decided?"

"Yes," Kyouya admits easily. "Princess Michelle. The ceremony will take place before I go off to university."

Staggered and struck dumb, Hikaru bends down to sit on the floor.

"No," Kyouya pre-empts Kaoru, "I don't need your apology. Whatever will we do with you, Kaoru? In these circumstances, not telling Hikaru will make it an oppressive weight on his mind, and I did say I wanted an enjoyable weekend."

"… Her?" Hikaru says distantly. "The one with the brother complex?"

"Hark who's talking," Kyouya says loftily.

Hikaru chokes out a disbelieving laugh before hopping up and embracing their vice-president like Kaoru had, except with a lot more energy. Kyouya blinks, bewildered.

"No wonder. _No wonder_ – everything makes sense now."

Awkwardly, Kyouya pats Hikaru; Kaoru ensures that he snuffs out the giggle that is rising within him.

"Everything's moving so fast," Hikaru laments. "How are we going to share Kyouya-senpai?"

Drier than a desert, Kyouya asks, "Am I a toy?"

"That's why Princess Michelle is going to join the club," Kaoru says, ignoring their senior. "She's going to be in our class, Hikaru. Rather than excluding her, which I think is a shortsighted tactic, we can simply drag her along. Think about it: it'll look good, like Kyouya-senpai and Princess Michelle are getting to know each other while the truth is that we get Kyouya-senpai all to ourselves."

"Yeah, great idea!" Hikaru says, coming round to his point of view. "Let's do that. Is she gonna be irritating though?"

"Don't think so. She was okay once her Tono brought her brother here, wasn't she?"

"Excuse me," Kyouya interjects.

"No, you don't get a say, Kyouya-senpai," they inform him in stereo.

"Is that so?"

Elbows propped on Kyouya's knees, Hikaru grins. "Yes. It's a forfeit because senpai hid it from us."

"Untrustworthy," Kaoru says sanctimoniously.

"Besides, we were always going to have to befriend each other's spouses."

"Unless Kyouya-senpai wants to go to the effort of putting up an aloof front like you don't care about us?"

They bat their eyelashes at him maddeningly.

A slow smile spreads across Kyouya's face.

"As Kaoru has been in my company, it stands to reason that his development is a thing to be marvelled at," – the twins snort impertinently – "but Mori-senpai is indeed a miracle worker."

"Why are your compliments so backhanded?" they grumble.

Kyouya chuckles smarmily and lays a hand on Kaoru's head. "It's extraordinary how much less tense you are now that Hikaru knows."

"Isn't it," Hikaru scoffs. "Thank god we're awful at keeping secrets from each other."

He takes a cleansing breath.

"That's why I've got something to tell you too, Kaoru."

Spooked, Kaoru allows his brother to speak at his convenience.

"Technically, it's not my secret to tell either, but I figured it out on my own and I did want to say something…"

"Do you need me to leave?"

"No, stay, Kyouya-senpai. You can probably confirm it, and nobody beats senpai in discretion." Hikaru wrings his hands, working himself into a tizzy. "Ugh! Half of us should have been female, then we can marry each other and be done with it!"

Kaoru laughs waveringly.

"If only," Kyouya says wryly.

Hesitantly, Hikaru spills, "I – I think… Mori-senpai loves Haruhi."


	24. Chapter 6H

**CHAPTER SIX**

**The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!**

.

Spontaneously blanking out, Kaoru stares at Hikaru mutely.

Hikaru grimaces.

As one, they turn to Kyouya. He has an '_ah, it's true_' expression on his face that makes Kaoru slap a hand over his own mouth in wretched stupefaction.

_How can this be? How can it?_

"What – what – " Kaoru can't even articulate the question.

Hikaru closes his eyes in defeat.

Seeing the state they're in, Kyouya volunteers the information. "I'd suspected? It was the little things that added up," – Hikaru nods fervently – "to form the whole. I knew that Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai have always regarded their responsibility as our seniors with utmost gravity and earnestness even if they've never been loud about it, and Mori-senpai has been sidelining himself for a long, long time. However, I do not believe you two should take this news so hard – Mori-senpai willingly gave up the chance to court Haruhi, and it is only one amongst many sacrifices he has made."

"Is that meant to be comforting?" Kaoru asks him, distraught.

"_Yes_," Kyouya replies. "You too, Hikaru – be comforted. From the changes that have occurred in you since you began spending more time with Mori-senpai, I believe you understand what happened."

Numbly, Hikaru nods again, resting his forehead against Kyouya's knee.

Kyouya sighs, threading his fingers through Hikaru's hair. "Of all the seniors you could have been stuck with, it's the least compassionate one. Just your luck. I suppose I'd better do my best, lest I disappoint Mori-senpai or Honey-senpai. Right, how much do you know, Hikaru?"

Hikaru shrugs forlornly. "… The strawberry."

It shocks a stint of truncated laughter out of Kyouya. "I see."

Kaoru clasps Kyouya's forearm disconsolately.

"Where do I begin?" Kyouya wonders. "Firstly, because Mori-senpai is so extremely inclined to silence, you must understand that he is correspondingly cerebral in the extreme. Therefore, for you to appreciate this – it can't even be termed a romance, can it – one-sided relationship, you will have to rely on your mental acuity and emotional intelligence to fit the puzzle pieces yourself. Which you have plenty of, Kaoru; but here, I'll demonstrate: Hikaru, why did Haruhi appeal to Mori-senpai romantically?"

Mori couldn't have specifically apprised Hikaru in person, yet Hikaru says promptly, "Haruhi is genuinely kind and she never looks down on people – tick. Haruhi is hardworking – tick. Haruhi doesn't put up with crap but she is insightful enough to tell when people are just hurting or when they're being nasty for nasty's sake – tick. Haruhi is reasonable and practical – tick. Haruhi is loyal and brave – tick. Need I go on?"

"Yes," Kyouya says, nodding approvingly. "Haruhi is a combination of traits that Mori-senpai _personally_ values. Hence, the fundamental characteristics from which romance could blossom are present; it is true that there are other people who likely possess similar combinations, but proximity is the biggest predictor of love, after all. Hikaru is right – the gender balance in our group of friends is terrible. Day after day we are together – naturally, we have increased opportunities to observe and acknowledge each other – meaning that as the lone female of our group, Haruhi was always going to be a possible spousal candidate for each of us, if for no other reason than because it is always better for us to marry a friend than someone we neither know nor love."

"Exactly!" Hikaru agrees fervently. "So, Kaoru, each of us react to Haruhi in our own ways – we can't judge Mori-senpai by the same gauge as – Tono, for example. Where Tono is concerned, to say 'I love you' might mean no less than shouting it through the public announcement system in the school; it might mean a million bouquets of roses or a 30-carat diamond; it might mean flying non-stop between Tokyo and Boston. But Mori-senpai might be saying the same thing with a different action, don't you see? Mori-senpai is no fan of – of _speech_ – of oral communication! So he _does_ things! You know how Tono and I never seem to be able to give Haruhi a present that she likes? Well, Haruhi likes Mori-senpai's gifts, doesn't she?"

Comprehension dawning on him, Kaoru cries, "Meaning that Mori-senpai _paid attention_! Haruhi likes Mori-senpai's gifts because they are what she wants – "

" – or whatever will be useful to her – "

" – or what she likes," Kaoru finishes his brother's sentiment. "Oh my god."

"Yeah. Even that strawberry. Remember? At Haruhi's house for the first time. Even back then, Mori-senpai knew to offer the strawberry to Haruhi. It's in Mori-senpai's nature to be gallant and gentlemanly and all that, so maybe in and of itself that's not a big deal, but it makes Mori-senpai _happy_ to behave this way towards Haruhi."

"Yes, he does smile at Haruhi rather frequently, doesn't he," Kyouya states. "It's all relative, and the presence of Tamaki and such is precisely what makes it difficult to pick up on Mori-senpai's affections."

"He picked law! Law of all things!" Hikaru waves his arms around agitatedly. "So many ways to support Honey-senpai's business, and he picks law. Even if Mori-senpai is also a humanities guy like you and Tono, don't you think there's something in it?"

"That does indeed put him in a position to assist Haruhi should she require assistance during her college years, or even professional guidance," Kyouya says thoughtfully, tapping his chin. "At the same time, it plays to his strengths. How marvellous – indeed, I've always had a healthy respect for Mori-senpai."

Hikaru rolls his eyes. "You would, Kyouya-senpai. In some ways you're quite similar to Mori-senpai, except Mori-senpai is a man of integrity."

Purely reflexively, Kaoru lets out a huff of laughter before he manages to check himself.

Kyouya's eyes go dark. "If you think that Kaoru can save you in the event that I take action against you, you are terribly mistaken."

"Yes," Hikaru says tolerantly with a cheeky grin, "whatever Kyouya-senpai wants, Kyouya-senpai gets, huh? But it's okay. Honey-senpai says that the eviller you get, the more you're expressing your love."

"You know that Honey-senpai enjoys saying a whole lot of crap, right?" Kaoru says at the same time that Kyouya lifts his eyebrows with mild incredulity and asks, "Then how shall you like to be subjected to maximum evilness from now onwards?"

"No need, no need." Hikaru raises his hands defensively. "Kaoru is the one who needs it."

Outraged, Kaoru stabs his brother with his foot.

"To stay on topic," Kyouya continues flatly, utilising his trademark forbearing attitude to bring them to heel, "Mori-senpai knew to how to attack Haruhi's weak spots – he was the one who suggested that we use ootoro to secure Haruhi's cooperation for the physical examination incident. Although, I believe the absolute clincher is," – he directs a meaningful look at Kaoru – "Mori-senpai has been visiting Ranka-san on his own initiative. _Unfailingly_."

Kaoru squeezes his eyes shut and scrubs his face in distress. _Of course. The cups, the ironing board, the familiarity!_

Hikaru restrains him from destroying his genetically blessed visage, further saying, "Mori-senpai is a practical man, he foresees other people's needs and tries to meet them – that's how you know he cares, isn't it? Besides, Kaoru – why have _you _been visiting Ranka-san? Sorry to poke an old wound, but isn't it partly because it's a way of caring for Haruhi by extension? You see how Mori-senpai's brain works?"

"But," Kyouya swiftly qualifies, "Mori-senpai chose not to court Haruhi. I must emphasise this."

"What difference does that make, Kyouya-senpai?" Kaoru asks regretfully. "Doesn't all this indicate that Mori-senpai could have been the first person to make a move? They would have been awesome for each other."

Kyouya's eyes widen. "Are you asking me that? _You_, Kaoru? Are you really asking me what difference it makes?"

"Why…" Kaoru trails off, perplexed at that reaction.

Placing his hands on Kaoru's cheeks, Hikaru leans in closer. "Let's put it this way: Mori-senpai is able to love with an open heart. Senpai has learnt how to love someone without needing to possess that person and he can feel all of those emotions without letting them get out of control – without letting them turn bitter or letting them rule his life. At a time when we were still so stupid, Mori-senpai already saw all of this. He knew he had to give us juniors the space to learn our lessons and develop our relationships ourselves. Who does he remind you of, my idiot brother?"

"Yes, I distinctly recall a certain person who engineered a date in Karuizawa in order to help other people grow out of their shells," Kyouya adds in a tone as slippery as butter.

"And I distinctly recall a certain person who actually moved first but backed out anyway," Hikaru gibes. "Tell us, then, Kaoru – what difference does it make?"

_Ah._ Kaoru grins sheepishly at them.

"When we went to the Ootori hospital with Ranka-san, Kaoru, I told you that Honey-senpai has been saying things to me – dropping hints here and there… we never got to have that chat but I think Honey-senpai wanted me to know about Mori-senpai's feelings. It's just – if I can relate to Mori-senpai, it's beneficial to our training, you know? It really helped to get rid of that sort of angry frustration – I don't know if either you or Kyouya-senpai have ever experienced it – it's like an aimless burning in your chest that can't be extinguished. You just feel annoyed at anyone who's never been through what you have, or who aren't facing the unsolvable problem that you are, and to everyone you think, 'how can you understand?' even if it's unfair to them. When I look at Mori-senpai now, I understand courage and maturity and… self-control, I guess. It makes it inexcusable for me to behave in a childish manner, so I stop. It's amazing, Kaoru," Hikaru says with a _childlike_, not _childish_ joy, proving that he can walk the talk. "Because Mori-senpai can let go, I feel like I can, too. I'm sorry you couldn't have taught me the same lesson, brilliant though you are, 'cos the truth is that you deprive yourself of something so I can have it whereas Mori-senpai is not depriving himself or anyone else at all, and it hurts me when you do that, okay?"

Stricken, Kaoru doesn't manage to stop the tears from welling up. "I – I'm sorry. I'm _sorry_, Hikaru."

Hikaru gazes back, pained at having to say what he did. "And you're doing that again, right now, right this instant. Do you get it? You're depriving yourself of something for Kyouya-senpai and I know it's going to hurt everyone, that's why I'm going to tell them no matter how hard you beg."

With a note of displeasure, Kyouya demands, "What has he done?"

Kaoru begs still, clawing at Hikaru's sleeve, because he can't _not_. Hikaru holds fast to his proclamation. "Kaoru is the Hitachiin listed for the SHH… IT'S A SECRET party, Kyouya-senpai. He was going to stay behind while the rest of us meet up with Haruhi."

Silence falls, protracted and stifling – Kaoru focuses on not flinching, unable even to lift his head, much less look his senior in the eyes.

Finally, in a completely neutral voice, Kyouya says, "Well, it's done."

Kaoru doesn't know what he was expecting, but it surely wasn't this. There is no yelling and no trace of anger, and somehow that makes it all worse.

"H-Huh?" Hikaru asks the question on the twins' minds. Clearly they had both been bracing themselves for Kaoru to be flayed, and Hikaru is evidently of the opinion that Kaoru would have deserved it.

"It's done, isn't it?" Kyouya stands, entirely rational and level-headed. "There is no likelihood of withdrawing."

"… No," admits Hikaru.

Barely a whisper, "I'm sorry, senpai."

At those words, Kyouya flicks a glance his way. "Let's rejoin the others. Honey-senpai doesn't like dessert time to be interrupted."

Despondently, Kaoru traipses out behind his brother and senior.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

In the garden, Tamaki starts to rail at them for taking the game too far. "Where were you? I searched for ages!"

Content to follow Kyouya's pace, Hikaru doesn't say anything about Kaoru's… transgression, merely laughs and engages in his favourite pastime of winding up their club president. He ribs Tamaki about being a poor seeker and Tamaki retaliates by saying that Hikaru had the home ground advantage; in the end, Tamaki demands to be 'inducted into the club' and Hikaru leads him away to show him a few of their hideouts.

Kyouya is seemingly unconcerned, tucking himself back in the same lounge chair and waiting for the ice cream to be served, while Honey is too absorbed by the prospect of sweet treats to bother with exploring the mansion.

So Kaoru also pretends that nothing had happened, even though he is sensing this awful frigidity from Kyouya. Anyway, couldn't it be a product of his paranoia, since Kyouya never wastes effort on things that cannot be changed?

_Right_, he reminds himself firmly, _didn't Kyouya-senpai immediately accept that there is no way out? Kyouya-senpai is a born problem-solver and a subscriber to simplicity and non-wastage – he can be incredibly streamlined and minimalist in terms of the things that he can be arsed to do, and he'll never make a fuss. Maybe he won't even tell the others, 'cos there's no point?_

Hope reignited, Kaoru kneels on the mat and begins to distribute the glasses of dessert prepared by the servants. One by one, he hands out the silver ice cream forks to his friends; Kyouya takes his without change in facial expression.

Mori's eyes linger on Kaoru for several seconds longer than necessary; it's not possible that Mori would know that they've been discussing him… is it so noticeable that Kaoru's relationship with Kyouya is a bit strained now?

He had been about to smile inquiringly, _harmlessly_, until he sees –

He_ sees_ his senior for the person that he is and experiences an epiphany about the meaning of true greatness and feels his heart expand with limitless respect and love as everything before catches up with him, too much to handle or to hide –

Kaoru flings himself at Mori and hugs him for all he's worth.

"Thank you, thank you, _thank you_," he croaks repeatedly, tapering off only when he knows he can't speak anymore unless he wants to cry on the spot. The garden is curiously quiet, as though the birds and bugs are reluctant to intrude on something so hugely significant – an admission by a Hitachiin twin that he _isn't_ the world's foremost authority on the other Hitachiin twin, and the final irrevocable acknowledgement that each of them need more than just their twin to be happy and _whole_.

Mori's gentle hands had come up to support Kaoru's back and nape, and _how on earth can anyone have such miraculous, stabilising hands? How can anyone be so staggeringly dependable?_

"I – I just… Hikaru's still retained all of his loveable traits and he's still carefree and playful," Kaoru says, muffled and small, "but there are these moments of startling, wondrous – _change_. It's so sophisticated, the way he can do the things he did before, except with a newfound… awareness? that makes his actions kind instead of spiteful."

He pulls back a little, fingers lightly curled around Mori's head – "I didn't realise I couldn't do that for him. Thank you, senpai, I'm infinitely grateful." – and lets Mori have a part of himself and of his twin, pressing a kiss to the corner of those lips that curve upwards ever so slightly.

In return, Kaoru grins broadly and scoops a strawberry from his glass to transfer to Mori's glass.

Mori blinks at the ripe, red fruit.

_Thank you for being there for us_, or _I'm sorry we weren't there for you_, or _I'll try my hardest to be a better friend to you_, or maybe it really just is:

_We're all okay now._

Tamaki and Hikaru crash back in rowdily and nobody has the chance to say anything further, not that there is anything more that requires saying.

To Kaoru's unending relief, the rest of the day is gloriously uneventful. Neither Kyouya nor the twins makes any reference to the New Year's Day party – the issue appears to be shelved for the moment. He isn't certain how Kyouya feels about it, and in all honesty, Kyouya isn't giving him the cold shoulder nor are his actions any cooler than they usually are. Damn, he can be so hard to read. It makes Kaoru nervous; he can't shake the feeling that his senior is more upset than circumstances would indicate.

They revise their brains to exhaustion, manage to have a swim in the indoor heated pool in the late afternoon, and retire to bed at a time that Kyouya claims is 'early' – apparently because he has decided that in the absence of a clock, it is always too early to stop working, too early to sleep and definitely too early to wake up.

For once, however, he's right – every one of them is asleep by eight thirty.

If Kaoru had known that _'we're all okay'_ will last only till tomorrow, perhaps he would not have been able to sleep at all.


	25. Chapter 6I

**CHAPTER SIX**

**The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!**

.

Despite the lack of clocks, Kaoru deduces that it is sometime past 8 but not yet past 9 in the morning when he first wakes up. This is because a glance around the beds reveals that the occupants are himself, Kyouya and Hikaru – since Mori traditionally wakes at 5:30 am, Tamaki at 6, Haruhi and Honey at 7-8, Hikaru and Kaoru at 9-10, it stands to reason that the time can be estimated fairly accurately from their habits.

Mori is also with them, albeit awake and leaning against the headboard, the fingers of his left hand tangled in a messy spill of red hair belonging to the head that is comfortably using his thigh as a pillow. Kaoru feels a grin deep within himself at his senior's consideration. It's obvious to him that Mori had decided to climb back in between Hikaru and Kyouya, as the consequences of hitting Kyouya in his sleep do not bear thinking about. He has a little booklight clipped onto his novel – Kaoru notes with awe that his senior is reading A Tale of Two Cities in the original English – and all in all he is as silent and unobtrusive as a statue save the occasional flipping of a page.

Kaoru closes his eyes, exhales, and opens them again.

He wriggles across the distance where Honey had lain and pauses several inches away from Kyouya, feeling utterly dismal about yesterday's events. He can understand if Kyouya is angry, and he accepts that it was his fault, it's just… he hopes that he hasn't alienated his senior, he doesn't know how to make things better and he's afraid to find out how long Kyouya can keep this up; his senior has an incredible stamina that outlasts most common mortals.

Tentatively, he reaches up to touch Kyouya's face. He looks incredibly defenceless when asleep, which amplifies the protective ache in Kaoru's heart.

Inquiringly, Mori turns to him and raises his eyebrows.

Kaoru smiles weakly in response and resolves to get up to start his day. No point lying down and brooding – with his overactive imagination, nothing good can come of it.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Oh, Kao-chan," Honey lifts his head from his notes, "You're up early!"

"I couldn't sleep without you by my side, Honey-senpai," Kaoru replies cheekily, sitting down beside him. Switching on his laptop, he checks the club email before checking his own inbox. There's a message from Haruhi that he reads eagerly – she tells him how glad she is that they will be spending Christmas together and the guilt just about obliterates him. Since the rest do not yet know about it, he marks the email as unread and leaves it for the time being. He can always compose a suitable reply later.

Pushing it out of his mind, he pulls out a couple of the mock exam papers from Kiyomi and they refocus on their studying. The weekend so far has been gratifyingly _domestic_, and Kaoru almost cannot believe how much he's loved it. The idea of doing nothing together sounds terrific. He has no need to find activities to engage in or topics to talk about – it's just about being in each other's company, and in their company he is content to remain forever.

Hours later, Tamaki asks in confirmation, "We're going out for dinner tonight, right? When are we going to give Kyouya his presents? Before or after?"

A bit nervous, Kaoru frowns worriedly. "I dunno, Tono – I don't actually physically have Kyouya-senpai's presents with me yet."

Tamaki goggles at him. "Kaoru!"

"I know, I know!" Kaoru flails back at him. "It's under control, okay?!"

"Why aren't they here yet?! Are your tailors having trouble? Even Haruhi's gift has arrived!"

Distracted, Kaoru asks, "Oooh let me see!" Tamaki hands a wrapped package to him, and he checks it out like a child on Christmas Eve. "What's inside!"

"Haruhi didn't say," Mori answers as he comes through the door with Hikaru.

Astutely, Hikaru probes, "But do you actually know what's inside, Mori-senpai? You do, don't you?" He flops onto the sofa and gazes at Mori expectantly.

"Not fair!" Tamaki wails in distress.

"Ah," Mori says, waiting for rescue.

"Takashi guessed!" Honey beats Kaoru to it. "Takashi is a very good guesser, and that's why Chika-chan never likes to play against Takashi."

He nods, and hauls Hikaru up to tutor him. Hikaru sighs heavily for a reason known only to a few of them, and Kaoru adds with sympathetic amusement, "Poor Chika sounds like he's never won a game in his life."

"Honey-senpai," Tamaki, defender of the underdogs, predictably launches in, "Wouldn't it be okay for you to let Yasuchika win sometimes?!"

"Ehhh? But Chika-chan always knows it when we let him win, and he gets angry!"

"Isn't it so," Kaoru drawls. "You don't know Chika's personality at all, Tono." From the corner of his eye, he sees Hikaru and Mori conduct a mental conversation. Hikaru gives a small shrug in apology, and everything blows over in an instant.

Kaoru lets out a not-quite-stifled snort. _This is crazy._

Then, an alert pings on his desktop and he fights the instinctive urge to jump up excitedly.

Calmly, he locks his laptop and excuses himself, goes down a flight of stairs and heads to the entrance to wait. The servants are surprised to see him there. Due to the precision of his information source, he is right on time – Hacker-san informs him that she had embedded another GPS device into the parcel now resting in the back of the delivery truck that is pulling into the massive driveway of the Hitachiin mansion. Accordingly, Kaoru personally signs for it, dispenses with the usual security checks and carries it into a room in order to examine it in private.

And he laughs in delight. Everything is perfect.

Ironically, the only glitch left in this situation is his newfound hesitance to give these presents to Kyouya. Nonetheless he takes out a gift box, ribbons and decorative tissue that he'd prepared beforehand and begins to finish the project at last, arranging them carefully for strategic purposes.

"… Hnn."

Kaoru whirls around in fright. "Mori-senpai!" he gasps, arm-deep in wrapping paper and entirely horrified to see his way-too-ninja senior standing behind him with one of the presents – a file – in his hands, reading through its contents. That pair of deep, dark eyes are widened with shocked understanding, and the last shadow of doubt falls away for Kaoru is able to perceive clearly that Mori has connected all the dots and he is indeed part of Q.E.D., validating every single one of Kaoru's guesses.

Mori's lips go thin with displeasure. He replaces the file on the table and stalks to the exit.

_Oh god, he's seriously angry._

Panicked, Kaoru runs after him and barely manages to grasp his sleeve. _I knew it, I knew I shouldn't have!_ "Mori-senpai!" he pleads, close to cracking. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I shouldn't have meddled, I'm sorry! I'll make amends for it!"

Mori looks at him with an expression that would have been wooden on anyone else but passes as confused astonishment for him. "You aren't the one who has to apologise."

"W-What?" Kaoru stutters, equally lost. "But, but you – !"

"Kyouya promised me he wouldn't involve you or Hikaru," Mori says shortly, still advancing towards the door. Kaoru's grip slackens and he lets him go… until he processes those words and realises the full implications – _oh, no!_

"Gah!" He throws himself after his senior. "No! Mori-senpai, Kyouya-senpai didn't say anything about this to me! I found out myself!" Mori is dragged to a halt. "Kyouya-senpai doesn't even know that I know – all of this, I did out of my own initiative. Kyouya-senpai is not to blame!"

Kaoru submits himself to be stared at for Mori to ascertain the truth. "I found out myself," he repeats. "And why… Mori-senpai, why shouldn't Hikaru or I be involved? Because of Dad, we're the best placed to buy shares in electronics companies; it doesn't make sense for senpais to discount the benefits of such a hugely convenient avenue? Aren't we friends? Why didn't you approach us for help? Why can't _I_ help?"

A large hand lands on his head, at once silencing and comforting him. "We are not just your friends, Kaoru."

"Then, it was deliberate?" Kaoru questions, annoyed. "You, Honey-senpai and Kyouya-senpai deliberately left us out? _Why?_"

Mori simply studies him neutrally.

"… We wouldn't be a burden," Kaoru ventures falteringly.

Immediately, Mori gathers him close. "And that's why."

Caught off guard, Kaoru blinks rapidly and shifts a little in the embrace. "I don't need to be protected, Mori-senpai. I can hold my own, really. We could make really valuable contributions, and Mori-senpai wouldn't have to – "

"No."

"Senpai!" Kaoru protests. "I know you must be working yourself to death!"

"You have enough on your plate."

"But Kyouya-senpai's hands are tied, so Mori-senpai basically has to take over Eon Corporation yourself, don't you?"

"I'm fine with it."

"Of course you are, senpai, but I – "

"No."

"Wait, let me – "

"No."

"Why?!" Kaoru exclaims agitatedly. "_Why?!_ I said, I don't need to be protected, senpai! Why won't you believe me?"

Mori makes this gruff noise and covers the top half of his face with his palm. He stays like that for one whole minute, and finally says, "Kaoru, you aren't stupid." Clasping Kaoru's shoulders firmly, he continues with utmost seriousness, "You must know what it means that Kyouya is targeting his mother's company. You must know what it may possibly lead to."

"Yeah, I know," Kaoru says quietly. "No matter what, Eon is half of Kyouya-senpai's heritage even if it is often overshadowed by the enormity of Ootori Group. However, in light of the Slez Syndrome Ootori Pharmaceuticals affair, and after the marriage announcements, don't they all lead to the same conclusion anyway? Whether or not we like it, it's game on."

"Exactly." Mori releases him. "It is not your game, and it is not Hikaru's."

"It wasn't Mori-senpai's or Honey-senpai's either, not until you chose to make it your business! Isn't it that Honey-senpai and Kyouya-senpai agreed to rebuild and probably co-own Eon? Am I right? Honey-senpai wants to manufacture games and toys, and with the resources and old prestige of Eon electronics, you would definitely be able to create something great together?"

"_We_ are Kyouya's senpais," Mori says in a tone that suffers no opposition.

"Being a kouhai doesn't make me useless!" Kaoru retorts heatedly.

"It doesn't." Mori nods. "It only means we want to protect you. Shouldn't Mitsukuni already have taught you that we do it because we love you? It is not a bad thing, Kaoru."

Temporarily stunned at that amazing directness, Kaoru's unexpected temper abates. Why had it flared so suddenly, with such vehemence? Was this how Hikaru had been conquered? Feeling every inch the junior that he is, Kaoru lowers his eyes to the floor sadly. "Then… should I still give these presents to Kyouya-senpai? Or does Mori-senpai want to take them now and deal with them without my interference?"

Mori ponders over it. He goes to crouch over the items and sifts through them, and actually smiles a bit. "It's your effort, your choice."

"Um, well," Kaoru mumbles, "I think Kyouya-senpai won't want to receive them from me, since, you know. And, uh," _– he's unhappy with me at the moment –_ "maybe it's not such a good idea after all."

"Aaa," Mori remarks.

Alerted by the tone, Kaoru asks, "… What, senpai?"

"Don't you know why Kyouya has been trying to distance himself from you since he discovered yesterday that you aren't going to America?"

Gaping and spluttering are the sole options available to him, _damn it_. He had not known that Mori already knew about New Year's.

"You," he attempts, and it comes out as a squeak instead. Abandoning his faculties of speech, he shakes his head.

Mori nods again, decisively. "Give them to him. He may tell you the reason why."

"O-Okay."

Kaoru rushes to fix them up, and Mori kindly lends his assistance for the rest of the way – even though Kaoru vigorously projects at him: _how did you find out_, and _are you angry_, Mori only supplies an answer when they are done and about to depart. "Bath."

_Oh, _he thinks weakly, _Mori-senpai interrogated Kyouya-senpai when they were bathing last night? Unbelievable._

"Come along, Kaoru."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

After, Mori appears to have hit his quota for the day, which leaves Kaoru to formulate excuses about their disappearance.

The Shadow King is resurrected at two in the afternoon, and his team arrives at three thirty.

When the servants surreptitiously summon Kaoru to the waiting room, Kaoru dances in with his digital camera dangling from a strap around his wrist, making some not wholly voluntary "kya, kyaa" noises before he asks, "Where's it where's it where's it!"

"Kaoru-sama!" Hotta greets him enthusiastically, cradling a tiny cloth bundle to himself. At his side, there is a bag of kitten care necessities. Tachibana and Aijima bow politely.

Kaoru gasps anxiously – the cloth bundle and therefore the kitten is way smaller than he'd imagined, and he says it out loud. "Is it the runt of the pack or something?"

"It is an infant, Kaoru-sama," Tachibana explains, "although we cannot exclude that possibility too."

_An infant?! _"Oh," he breathes in wonder. Whipping himself into a frenzy, he sprints off. "I'll fetch Kyouya-senpai rightaway!"

Returning to the lounge room, he tells Kyouya that his team is here. Mildly bewildered, Kyouya rises to his feet compliantly – Mori also gets up, seemingly determined to monitor Kaoru and/or Kyouya. Given that Mori is the undisputed master at all things pets and animals, Kaoru does not object.

On their journey downstairs, Kyouya eyes his camera suspiciously.

The whole time since waking up, Kyouya has practically been ignoring Kaoru and treating him coldly, except – he _isn't_. That is, Kaoru knows for sure that Kyouya is shutting him out, although Kyouya is so masterful as to appear as though he is treating Kaoru no differently than before.

There is no warmth from him whatsoever, and Kaoru can only sense its absence because he has become accustomed to it. It's agonising.

"What's the matter?" he demands of Tachibana as soon as they enter.

"Happy birthday, Kyouya-sama," the three men say in unison as Kaoru shivers with anticipation on the sidelines, camera at the ready.

Kyouya frowns at him briefly, and returns his attention to his team. He clears his throat. "Thank you. Would it not have been better to leave this to Monday for you to enjoy your days off?"

"Hotta was too excited," Tachibana and Aijima say flatly, and Kaoru stifles his laughter while Hotta reacts with an odd strangled burp.

"I should have known," Kyouya says in the flattest voice of all.

"K-Kyouya-sama!" Poor bullied Hotta presents the bundle, lifting away the cloth. There, curled within the size of only one of Hotta's hands, lies a ball of grey fur.

Everyone stares at it, unmoving.

It wakes up from the jostling, barely able to raise its head before flopping back down helplessly. Its eyes are still shut and its ears are two somewhat-flattened miniature triangles, and Kaoru is speechless from an overload of cuteness.

The two seniors are rooted to the spot – Kyouya is quite unreadable, and Mori is melting.

Cautiously, Kaoru ventures closer for a better view. That's when the kitten's frail body trembles and it emits a sound – a soft squealing squeak that slams directly through the walls of Kaoru's heart, utterly demolishing him and apparently the rest of his fellow human beings. They stood no chance.

Yet another plaintive squeak, and Kyouya tilts his head slightly to the right.

Thus was the battle _won_.

Never, ever, ever again will Kaoru experience the immense privilege of seeing both Kyouya and Mori simultaneously succumb to any one thing with such dizzying rapidity.

Curious and gentle, Kyouya accepts the bundle from Hotta and spreads out the cloth on the nearby coffee table. The creature is unbearably fragile – its paws are only a fraction bigger than the fingernail of Kyouya's thumb, and there is next to no strength in its limbs at all. When Kyouya strokes its back, it responds and becomes more active, tumbling around within the dimensions of the cloth clumsily and making more and more squeaky squealing noises.

A smile is lurking around Kyouya's lips without his permission… he slides the padded portion of three fingers beneath the kitten's face and props it up, and like a miracle or perhaps it's just destiny, the kitten cracks open one of its eyes for the first time in its young life.

Kaoru senses that: a) this kitten will completely ruin Kyouya's image, and b) Kyouya is dying inside. _Of course_ he would be a cat person. His whole personality points to it, he could never have been a dog person like Tamaki and other pets aren't fitting either.

"8-10 days?" Mori asks the age of the kitten, soothing it with a warm hand.

"Yes, Takashi-sama," Hotta says with an undertone of admiration.

"It's a boy," Mori notes, conducting an inspection. "It's skinny. Food, warmth, waste, vet?"

Hotta snaps to attention, dutifully reporting that, "I found it in a box near a garbage bin, there was no sign of any of its relatives. It was almost dead and I rushed it to the vet; it almost didn't survive but the vet managed to stabilise it and it still needs intensive care. I have been feeding it regularly with cat formula," – he indicates the other presents – "and there is also an electric blanket that we've been using to keep it warm although we used a hot water bottle during the ride here. I've been using a damp towel to help it to relieve its waste so there are no problems with toxicity."

Mori's approval is evident in his body language. "We can handle it from here."

"Waaa, Hotta! You must have been an awesome nurse!" Kaoru cheers, and misses the fleeting shock from Kyouya. At the compliment, Hotta does that embarrassed gesture of rubbing his bald head. "And Mori-senpai, you're a genius! How many species of animals do you know how to care for, senpai? Will you be teaching Kyouya-senpai how to care for the kitten? Can I learn too?"

Tucking the baby kitten back into the cloth snugly, Kyouya stands. "I am aware of how to care for a kitten. Presumably you brought all the supplies I will need?"

"Yes, Kyouya-sama," they chorus.

"Well done," Kyouya says. "However, I'm afraid that you are not yet free from your responsibilities as we will be heading out for dinner tonight."

"Kaoru-sama has arranged for me to remain until you return, Kyouya-sama," Hotta says, "and tomorrow morning we will be here to remove the kitten safely to your home."

Kyouya nods, satisfied. "Tachibana, Aijima, you're dismissed." Hugging the bundle, he turns and walks off. "Hotta, prepare the formula and bring it up along with your records of his feeding journal."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

As the rest crowd over the tiny new addition to their host club family, Kaoru sits himself down in a nice corner to flick through the photos that he'd managed to capture, feeling mightily proud of himself. If he was Kyouya, an announcement for an upcoming auction would already have gone out on the club website.

But, Kaoru thinks he wants to hoard these pictures for himself, especially when Kyouya is showing some adorable signs of overprotectiveness by refusing to let anybody else handle the little cloth bundle. The Hitachiin twins have never been good at sharing, anyway.

Hotta brings the bottle of lukewarm milk, and without needing to be instructed, Kyouya is able to feed the kitten in the correct position, which is to have it resting on its stomach. Tamaki and Hikaru had thought that the kitten should be lying down on its back, and Mori had explained that it's dangerous because the kitten might inhale rather than swallow the formula that way.

"Okaaay," Hikaru says slowly with a cocked eyebrow, "it makes sense that Mori-senpai will know lots of stuff about animal care, but why does _Kyouya-senpai_ know so much?"

"Kyouya knows everything," Tamaki provides the easy answer, burbling and aww-ing at the kitten together with Honey. Mori is off installing the heated pad and setting up a suitable nesting box.

A vaguely evil grin spreads across Hikaru's face at the sight of Kyouya holding the kitten upright with its tummy against his shoulder to pat it gently until it burps. "Looks more like Renge was right about senpai."

Too conspicuously, everyone sucks in a breath and holds it, and Kyouya automatically glares at them. "It is only _appropriate_ that I properly care for gifts that have been given to me as a consequence of affection and concern from other people. Or would you like me to tell my servants that it is all right to have your previous presents thrown in the washing machine for tumble drying?"

Hikaru whimpers in horror and excuses himself to where Mori is.

"Kyouya," Tamaki says with disapproving amusement and trails after Hikaru, evidently of the opinion that his presence will help to improve Hikaru's mood.

"Is Kyou-chan really going to adopt this kitten?" Honey chirps, retrieving a stuffed toy from the bag and waggling it in front of the still-blind creature. It seems that there is a bell embedded inside the toy, as a soft clinking ring is heard. "Maybe Kyou-chan should think about getting another kitten to keep this one company? Takashi told me that some animals, like kittens and puppies, have so much energy that it is difficult for us humans to keep up with them sometimes, and Kyou-chan is so busy."

Kyouya ponders over it for a while. "That will double the work, though."

_I'll help_, Kaoru thinks immediately, but before he can volunteer, Kyouya makes up his mind. "No, I will make time for it. Besides, I have experience caring for hyperactive inquisitive creatures who require plenty of attention, constantly poke around my things and play too much until they collapse onto my bed in exhaustion."

_Really? Since when?_ Kaoru wants to ask, but Honey smiles knowingly and Kyouya nods matter-of-factly and it appears that this is yet another situation where he is left out of the loop. Determined not to cause a fuss, he obediently rises to his feet to fetch a supply of cotton balls and napkins for his senior when asked.

Then, he watches as Kyouya helps the kitten to eliminate, and finally he _has_ to comment, "Hikaru's right – this level of knowledge isn't exactly common or incidental, Kyouya-senpai."

Kyouya stills his hands for a few seconds. "I read a wide variety of books."

_You wanted one as a child, didn't you? What happened to your toy?_ Kaoru almost asks, and thankfully does not. Instead he says, "I've always wanted one as a kid." When the seniors look at him, he shrugs. "Our aunt thought that Hikaru and I shouldn't be trusted with pets."

Without pausing in his task, Kyouya hums in agreement.

They descend into awkward silence again, and now it's frankly obvious that something went wrong between the two of them. Honey gets this sharp, unhappy glint in his caramel eyes, and Kaoru quickly says, "Honey-senpai, just because Kyouya-senpai has decided to follow Renge's description doesn't mean you have to as well."

Naturally, Honey takes on a '_Nothing's funny about this, Kao-chan_' aura, and Kaoru scrambles up to make his escape. He feels like he has done nothing but apologise for the weekend thus far, and he has no idea what he's doing that's pissing them off to such an extent. Sacrifices have to be made – it's not like they don't know this – so why is it only ever a problem when the sacrifice comes from him? He won't demand some form of repayment from them years down the track, and this isn't some favour that is meant to put them in his debt or whatever. He will never hold it against them!

"Stay where you are, Kao-chan."

He winces, and rubs a hand over his eyes. Then he turns around and says conversationally, "Actually, I guess Renge's characterisations aren't correct after all, you know. I mean," – he scoffs – "she portrayed me as the seme! Oh, and Haruhi was a poor bullied honours student, but we all know that Haruhi doesn't put up with shit from anyone, right? Remember how she – "

"Kao-chan – "

" – pinched Tono's cheeks when Tono was trying to – "

"I said, Kao-chan – "

" – be a heroic fool instead of going to see Anne-Sophie-sama? And anyone who can treat a Suou like that must be a force to be reckoned with – "

"_Kao_ – "

"Anyway Hikaru's calling me probably cos Tono's being a pain again, so I'll go and help him 'kay senpai?"

He makes it out with a speed that he had not known himself capable of, and closes the door on them before running away to a place where he can hopefully escape that trapped, claustrophobic feeling in his chest.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Kaoru knows where and how to hide so that even Hikaru will not be able to find him, but…

Now what?

His worst nightmare is to have the five of them gather in one room and discuss him and the wrong things he's done. As such, he really wants to go back, if only to plant himself in the middle as a deterrent. At the same time he's terrified about returning, and his anxiety is snowballing into something huge and unmanageable.

He crumples to the floor and hugs his knees.

It could have been so _simple_. It should have been that uncomplicated. They were never meant to know about it until the day that they were to leave for America. He should have been more careful with his words. He should have been better at showing them that everything was fine and is fine and will remain just _fine_.

"Now what." Kaoru mutters to himself miserably. Honey won't have spared Kyouya the questioning, which means that everybody except Tamaki now knows about it. If the other four then decide to tell him, everything will have been for nothing.

_Ugh_, he reaches out a hand and strokes the sheer fabric of the ribbon atop the giftbox, _if only Mori-senpai had not discovered the gifts, then I could have chosen not to give them and continue working on them in secret instead._

Kaoru needs to learn how to be subtler. In the future, he promises himself, he will fully consider the consequences before taking action. He will say nothing at all, and he will endeavour to always be perfectly fine. No more will he increase their worries.

With his newfound resolve, he decides to go back to stop them from telling the last person who is still unaware.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

And he makes it just in time.

Kaoru squeezes himself in between Tamaki, Hikaru and Mori, who have taken all of one step into their designated study room. Instantly he senses that Honey is extremely upset, which is why he had brought along a handful of servants with him, including Hotta, ostensibly for the purpose of cleaning up the room and bringing in afternoon tea but whose real purpose is to act as Kaoru's shield.

It doesn't take long for Honey and Kyouya to figure out that he is trying to stop them from telling Tamaki, and Mori predictably observes everything, and Hikaru eventually picks up on it.

Of course Kaoru had known that he's running the risk of making everything worse. He's not trying to be difficult at all; he only intends to prevent their informing Tamaki. It had been important to him that they not know, and so long as there is at least one person who still doesn't know, Kaoru will cling to it till the end.

"All of you can go," Hikaru dismisses the servants, overriding Kaoru's orders.

"Wait," he contradicts his twin. "The tea is too bland; redo it."

Hikaru stares at him, and suffers the servant to do as Kaoru had commanded. Again he tries to send them away, and again Kaoru calls them back. "It's too rich now; brew it again."

_Are you mad?_ Hikaru yells at him mentally.

_I just don't like the tea_, Kaoru tells him, keeping his gaze down.

Sufficiently weirded out, Tamaki asks, "Wh-What's going on?"

Frustrated, Hikaru exhales violently. "Kaoru is – "

"Hotta, make tea for me."

Hikaru laughs and apparently chooses to withdraw, shaking his head as he throws himself onto the sofa. He is clearly waiting for one of the seniors to engage Kaoru.

Slightly nervously, Hotta does as requested, and Kaoru makes him rearrange the sweets as well.

"Kaoru!" Tamaki scolds. "Stop bullying the servants!"

Nobody else intervenes, and Kaoru continues to get his way. He'd known, from what Mori had said earlier, that Kyouya is attempting to distance himself – as usual, Mori's information proves to be accurate, and if Tamaki had been hoping for Kyouya to stop Kaoru from ordering Hotta around, he is sorely mistaken. The people who are most likely to end this farce are the two oldest seniors, and it will take them a while to get around to it because they will want Kyouya to do it first.

Kyouya is tending to his baby pet, Kaoru is tending to his tea, and neither of them is acknowledging the other.

Tamaki is absolutely apoplectic. "What's going on?! Explain yourself, Kaoru!"

"Sit down and have some food, Tono." He pats the ground beside him.

"Enough," Mori and Honey say simultaneously. _Aha_, Kaoru thinks ruefully. "Thank you, you may go now," Mori tells the servants, who look incredibly relieved to be able to leave. Hotta turns around one last time at the door, casting a worried glance Kaoru's way.

"Finally," Hikaru grumbles, straightening up. "For fuck's sake, Kaoru, you – "

"So," Kaoru interrupts brightly, "I think we should present our gifts now! This will ensure that we've got time to dress up before dinner, and we all know how long Hikaru and I typically take."

At this, Kyouya flicks his gaze to him dispassionately. "Fine by me."

… It hurt.

It really hurt.

Abruptly, Kaoru realises that somewhere along the way he'd become furious himself despite his best intentions, and he doesn't know why. He's not sure he has the right to. Maybe it's because no matter what, he would prefer to have Kyouya feel something towards him than to feel nothing at all, and if he was to be honest with himself, he too was hoping that Kyouya would get fed up and rebuke him for trying to use such a tactic against them, or to at least _react_ in some way, and –

Kaoru is _scared_.

_Oh, oh no_, he reels in sudden awareness, appalled at himself. He totally acted out just now even though it is somebody else's special day, even though that somebody is the person that he had most wanted to protect and to make happy.

Tamaki and Hikaru are in the process of voicing their protests loudly, both of them insisting that everybody needs to stop being stupid and be friends once more.

"N-No," Kaoru stammers blankly, causing them to go quiet. "No, you're right. I'm sorry. Honey-senpai, I'm sorry I walked out on you just now. You – you can tell him if you want. All of you can get angry if you want. I won't – I won't anymore." He gasps painfully, shocked at his irrationality in trying to provoke Kyouya. Why did he behave that way? Why had he so needed a response? "Please forgive me; I shouldn't have."

Just what had he wanted from Kyouya?

They blink at him.

"Thank god," Hikaru wails with great relief. "I thought you'd lost your mind!"

_I – I did_, Kaoru admits to himself. "I'm sorry."

Honey sighs, and brushes Kaoru's cheek. "Kao-chan, you've been so silly."

"Somebody tell me what's going on!" Tamaki clamours. "Why is everyone being so secretive?! Hikaru, you never tell me things!"

"I was waiting for Kyouya-senpai to tell you!" Hikaru rails back.

"Actually," Mori interjects gravely, causing everyone to focus on him, "I agree that we should present our gifts now."

"Eh?"

He directs a thoughtful look at Kyouya. "Yes, we should."

Uncomfortably put on guard, Kyouya scrutinises the taciturn senior for additional hints.

Faithfully trusting Mori's judgement, Honey and Hikaru second the motion without delay. "Yay! Presents, presents!"

"Hey, wait!" Tamaki rushes out after them, engulfed in more confusion than ever before.

Mori tucks an arm around Kaoru to guide him out. "Let's go and fetch yours, Kaoru."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Halfway, Kaoru swivels around uneasily. "Mori-senpai, I really think I shouldn't – "

"You should." Mori is giving off the impression that he will watch Kaoru like a hawk to ensure that Kaoru does not swap the contents of the gift.

"Mori-senpai!" Kaoru objects desperately. "Why? Wouldn't it be the same if you take it and use it for that business? You saw him just now, he hates me – he's going to kill me if he knows what I've done."

"He does not hate you; you hurt him," Mori explains patiently, steering Kaoru firmly. "Like he hurt you."

"H-Huh?" Kaoru resists his senior, fingers clasping his muscular arms.

"It was his intention to distance himself from you, although he was so angry at what you did that I suspect a part of him ended up trying to punish you for it – the same way it was your intention to stop us from telling Tamaki, but a part of you was so hurt by Kyouya that you ended up lashing out at him."

"Are you omniscient?!" Kaoru cries, letting Mori march him forward. His senior is emitting some hn-hn-hn sounds of amusement.

When they arrive at the room containing the present, Mori sets him down gently. Kaoru picks up the box, gazing at it sadly.

"Listen, Kaoru," Mori advises, placing his hands on Kaoru's shoulders, "It will be all right to give it to Kyouya. Your gift will show him that it is impossible for him to distance himself from you, and once he understands this, he will also know what is the right thing to do."

"… The right thing?"

"Yes."

"What if he – "

"Kyouya is very smart," Mori asserts with a shadow of a smile. "He will understand."

Reluctantly, Kaoru says, "He didn't understand before."

"He understood," Mori replies confidently. "He was simply afraid of what it would mean for him, and so he tried to undo it."

Kaoru shakes his head. "I don't want to. Please just take it, Mori-senpai."

Benignly, Mori ignores him.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) Baby kittens are extremely fragile. Orphaned kittens may not survive even when given the best care possible. There are many things contributing to this: infant kittens cannot produce/regulate their own heat, so they require an external heat source to keep them warm. This is usually the mother cat, although humans generally keep the kittens warm using electric blankets and hot water bottles. Therefore, when rescuing abandoned or orphaned newborn kittens, they must **not** be fed until their body temperature has been brought up to a suitable degree (often the abandoned/orphaned kittens will already be in the process of freezing to death).

Baby kittens are also born blind and deaf. Their eyes are jammed shut, and their little ears are folded down. They truly are incredibly helpless. Their umbilical cords also should not be messed with – these will fall off on their own after a couple of days. They all have blue eyes as kittens, and the colour of the eyes will change to their adult colour as they grow. Because of these many indicators, it is possible to determine the age of an abandoned or orphaned kitten with fairly close precision.

If you want to get a proper idea of how Kyouya's kitten is like, you may view some YouTube videos. Be warned, however, that the kitten videos section of YouTube is like a merciless black hole that will suck you in and destroy your soul.

Here are my personal favourites, made better by the fact that the kitten in question is grey like Kyouya's Noel _(the title between the inverted commas is the title of the actual youtube video, so you can search if the links provided are less than ideal) _:

1. A two day old tabby kitten: "Tabby Kitten 2 Days old" watch?v=Snk6oGAfcp8

2. Same tabby kitten, 1 week old: "Tabby Kitten 1 Week Old" watch?v=0RIJ49lbd4I

3. Given that Kyouya's Noel is around 9 days old now, this video shows you the size/mobility/state of 9-day-old kittens: "9-day-old kittens" watch?v=UslE99fhZ1E

4. Have a glimpse into Noel's future; at 4 weeks, it will be as irresistibly cute as this: "4 week old kitten learns how to walk!" watch?v=P1UTWgRFfxg

5. Watch the entire playlist from kootra, who documented the growth of his cats' 2 newborn kittens until the kittens head off to a new home. DEVASTATINGLY CUTE. A good place to start watching is from the video titled "Newborn Kittehs! :)" playlist?list=PL766A145C810D8619&feature=view_all

(b) Honey is correct when he said that it is better for kittens to have a sibling/friend. However the special chapter shows that Kyouya only has one, so.


	26. Chapter 6J

**CHAPTER SIX**

**The High School Hosts are the Exclusive Type!**

.

Hikaru lights up with an exclamatory hoot. "Haha! What a gift!"

Dangling from his fingers is half a collection of keyrings, each one of them bearing the official crest of an Ivy League University. The other half is in Kyouya's palm, and he is studying them with a faint smile. Haruhi had apparently gone to all of these universities to personally pick up something from their merchandise store – the gift is somehow very her: it is not expensive, it is rather thoughtful, and although it is not the most practical thing ever, it is right for the situation because trying to buy practical things for someone as well-prepared and self-sufficient as Kyouya is next to impossible.

While Tamaki fawns and gushes over the shiny trinkets, Kyouya moves on to Hikaru's offering and finds a brand new sharply tailored one-of-a-kind business suit that is oozing taste and luxury. Kaoru gasps in awe at his brother's handiwork – the seams reveal that Hikaru hand stitched at least some parts of this by himself. The shirt is crisp and smooth, the fabric of the suit jacket and trousers is simply marvellous, and… the silk tie. Hikaru obviously made the entire tie from scratch, and the soft feel of it when Kaoru knots it up is slightly addictive.

"Wow, Hika-chan!" Honey praises him. Hikaru doesn't even bother to look modest. "Takashi's gift and your gift go perfectly well together, don't they?"

"Do they?" Kaoru asks curiously. "I thought you were coordinating with me."

Hikaru grins. "Yeah. Three-way coordination – who said I can't organise stuff?"

Turns out, Mori's gifts complete the high-flying businessman image: a stunning pair of John Lobb, a number of handcrafted belts, and no less than _three_ pens from Caran d'Ache, Kyouya's (and the twins') favourite company for writing instruments.

Kaoru lets out a noise that is disturbingly reminiscent of the kitten and leans in closer to examine the pens. They are so beautiful; truly they are works of art in their own right. Both of the twins own a Modernista each, given to them by today's birthday boy – Kyouya has an impeccable eye for these things, and he thanks Mori for the exquisite gifts.

Tamaki presents something so baffling that Kaoru doesn't even want to try to describe, and Honey gives Kyouya a piece of notepaper.

Weeping with the force of a hailstorm, Tamaki laments the reception to his gift. "It's a coffee machine, a coffee machine!" he asserts vehemently. "The advertisement said it can produce top quality coffee at just the push of a button!"

Hikaru opens his mouth and makes everything worse. "Are you dumb, Tono? Kyouya-senpai is barely conscious in the mornings; you want him to have to make his own coffee?"

"Kyouya! Why do you prefer Honey-senpai's scrap paper to my magic coffee machine?!"

Kyouya sighs tolerantly. "Thank you, everyone. I appreciate it very much."

"Wait!" Hikaru calls a halt to the proceedings, amazed. "Honey-senpai, is that seriously your gift?"

Honey bobs his head several times, rapidly demolishing the plate of sweets while everyone is otherwise occupied.

"Let's see," Tamaki says, snatching the bit of paper and smoothing it out to read. "It's a promise note – 'to buy Kyou-chan a car for his personal use while he is studying in America'. Eh? Is Kyouya going to learn how to drive?"

"It would be interesting," Kyouya affirms, tucking the note in his pocket.

"Tachibana-san would have a heart attack! He wants to drive you around for the rest of your life!"

"Or his," Kaoru corrects.

"Or his!" Tamaki agrees.

"I didn't know Tachibana dictated what I can and can't learn," Kyouya remarks archly. "Besides, I've said it already – my team have established lives here in Japan, I do not expect them to relocate to a foreign country at my whim, thus I can no longer be wholly dependent on them for my mobility."

Hikaru whistles in admiration. "I swear I can sense Tachibana-san crying somewhere."

Kyouya rolls his eyes with an attitude that would have accompanied the words, "Can we move on, please?" – except that the only gift left is Kaoru's and Mori's meaningful look had clearly spooked him to some extent. He is apparently as unenthusiastic as Kaoru is about dealing with the elephant in the room.

_Let's get it over with, then._

Kaoru pushes the big box in the direction of his senior.

"Hey, this is way too hefty for a co – " Hikaru begins, and Kaoru shushes him. Sheepishly, Hikaru blinks apologetically. "Right. Wait for him to open it first. Got it."

_Honestly, though, how massive did you make the coat and briefcase?! Must be gigantic!_

Kaoru stares his twin down.

_Okay, okay. _Hikaru flashes him a lopsided smile. _Sheesh._

"Ooooh!" Tamaki helps Kyouya to fish out the double-breasted outercoat. "What a handsome coat!"

"You're gonna look so underdressed beside Kyouya-senpai, Tono," Hikaru comments out of the blue.

"I know," Tamaki sobs a bit, and runs his hands over the expensive material. "Kaoru, you've really outdone yourself!"

Kaoru forces a smile, feeling so tense with nervousness that it's a miracle he hasn't passed out. He had positioned himself behind the fortress that is Mori, partially concealing himself in the event that he needs saving. Kyouya's features haven't once changed away from the placid, controlled expression that he has plastered on.

"And look!" Honey chirps, reaching into the box to extract the stylish luxury briefcase. "It's – "

He pauses, puzzled. Kaoru knows it's because the briefcase is far heavier than Honey had expected it to be… and that, in turn, is because the briefcase is not empty. "Araa…?" Their senior's small hands grip the silky-soft calf leather to heave it out of the box and plunk it into Kyouya's lap.

Intrigued yet still wary, Kyouya unbuckles the case. Inside is four large ring binder files and three external hard drives.

Kyouya looks at Kaoru briefly before opening the first file. His eyes go huge and he cannot refrain from a surprised exhale.

Then descends the same sort of dreadful silence that Kaoru had endured at Yuuichi's and Kiyomi's house – the stark, absolute, bated breath type that makes his innards shrivel. Honey is reading over Kyouya's shoulder, and all the cards are on the table. Kaoru had used his connections to round up and capture companies and/or shares that will be useful for their business, but stopped just shy of buying them all out in order not to garner any unwanted attention – some of these companies have been absorbed into Kaoru's father's business as "part of normal operations", and others are floating around waiting to be claimed by the seniors' business.

Two of the files contain detailed share information and insider knowledge of the industry in which they are trying to make a breakthrough, one file contains a rather comprehensive library of programs that Hacker-san has either created or hacked into, and the remaining file contains the specs and programming for PAIS-LE. The external hard drives contain the programs themselves.

In short, it is everything a budding electronics and games company needs to make their initial mark on the world.

Kaoru has provided the technological innovation and genius because the spark of creativity is nearly always his family's domain, and they are just so damn excellent at it. The other three will definitely find it much easier to build on this instead of having to concern themselves with the minutiae of design, something that really isn't exactly their forte.

The silence wears on long enough that Hikaru and Tamaki, who had been digging in the remainder of the box, decide to lift their heads to check it out. "… What?"

It jerks Kyouya out of his trance-like staring at the contents of the folders, and he snaps all of the files shut a tad too protectively after exchanging a quick glance with Honey.

"Oy, what's the big secret?" Hikaru complains. He returns his attention to the box, knocking on the base. "There's something here, but I can't open it. See? From the outside of the box, there must be a compartment in here," – he raises it up – "and it's heavy, but there doesn't seem to be a way for us to get to it. What the hell, Kaoru? Kyouya-senpai, do you mind if I saw through the box? Why would anyone do something like glue a present in?!"

'_Cos PAIS-LE's hiding in there, and if you lot see it before Q.E.D. can launch it, that's equivalent to telling you who the owners of Q.E.D. are, isn't it?_ Kaoru thinks wryly, leaning backwards in alarm when Hikaru picks up and wields a destructive cutting tool.

"Put that down at once," Kyouya orders. "There shall be no physical injury or accidental manslaughter on my birthday." He gathers up the folders and quickly replaces them inside the briefcase, then tips the briefcase back into the box. "I'm sure there is nothing left in it," he declares in a tone that practically dares someone to challenge him.

"There _is_ something there in it!" cries his best friend.

"Highly unlikely," Kyouya counters eloquently. "After all, it is ridiculous to make a gift inaccessible to the recipient. Kaoru must have wanted to construct a sturdy base."

It is only by chance that Kaoru was uptight to the point where he chokes on his laughter instead of having it explode out of him. God, the kind of rubbish that Kyouya can say with a straight face!

Without allowing any of them to recover or to protest further, Kyouya bids Hotta to remove all of the presents to somewhere unknown and proceeds to intimidate and coerce all of them into preparing for dinner.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Naturally, Kyouya manufactures an opportunity to accost him – and with Honey's assistance, no less.

"I'm sorry," Kaoru says automatically. He is freshly showered, dressed in lovely clothing and halfway through accessorising when he had been cruelly interrupted.

"What are you apologising for?" Kyouya asks, exasperated.

Kaoru shrugs timidly, unable to meet their eyes.

"Who told you, Kao-chan?" Honey questions gently.

He shrugs again, rifling through a study room drawer. "I figured it out myself."

"You figured it out yourself," Kyouya repeats sceptically.

"Don't worry," Kaoru tells them, thoroughly defeated. Snagging a penknife, he slices PAIS-LE out of its confines. "I won't do anymore than this, and I can keep a secret," he says reassuringly, holding out the shiny chromium-plated little bot. It had received a makeover, courtesy of Kaoru's design skills and some proper engineering – the sleek silver-coloured outer casing is easy to wipe clean, which makes much more sense now given that it is meant to be a household aid, and it has wheels that will not catch on the edges of carpets as well as opposable thumbs that are actually functioning.

"Waah, cute!" Honey exclaims, carefully accepting the bot.

"All of the instructions and relevant information are in those files. Please do with them as you see fit; I only really have one request – if it's possible, after senpais have developed your own prototype, may I have this particular bot back? It has special value."

"I want answers," Kyouya demands brusquely.

"My parents dropped enough hints for me to pursue the correct path of inquiry," Kaoru replies compliantly. "The rest was easy enough to accomplish because of my dad's personnel and the nature of his business, as I'm sure Kyouya-senpai and Honey-senpai always knew would be a real asset, but Mori-senpai already told me that all of you don't want me involved, so I guess this is as far as I go. I really am sorry," _– I honestly thought it'd make you happy –_ "and I will stop interfering."

Honey turns the bot around in his hands, sighs heavily, and passes it over to Kyouya who had gone completely quiet. "Kyou-chan has something he wants to say to you," he announces blithely, and leaves promptly.

… But Honey must be mistaken, as Kyouya does not speak for the longest time.

Despite his growing desire to escape, Kaoru compels himself to sit and wait.

Finally, Kyouya looks up from his inspection of the bot. "We will spend the seasonal holidays together with Haruhi," he informs Kaoru in a steely tone of command.

Kaoru blinks. _'We' including me?_ Shifting uncomfortably, he hedges, "Ah, senpai, you know as well as I do – "

"I don't care," Kyouya cuts him off. He bends over to put PAIS-LE on the floor. "Be there."

Flustered, Kaoru scratches the back of his neck, thinking of how to phrase his next sentence. "Kyouya-senpai, this – "

The person in question straightens up and fixes him with an intense stare. "If you want to give me what I want, then give me what I want. _Be there._"

"I can't! The invitations have – "

"So you're only willing to give me what you _think_ I want, instead of what I am telling you I want?"

"No!" Kaoru yells, annoyed at how difficult Kyouya insists on being and sensing a looming argument. "I'm saying that it can't be done now! You know this!"

"I know no such thing," Kyouya says in a forbidding voice. "What I know is that I _specifically_ asked you to arrange for all of us to be there, and you have treated my wishes with cavalier disregard!"

"Cavalier disregard?!" Kaoru echoes, unreasonably outraged. "What if I didn't want to be there?!"

"Do you not want to be there?" Kyouya challenges bitingly, with a dangerous edge to him that warns Kaoru that his next words had better properly go through his brain first.

Kaoru deflates. "I just… I just think… it will be really good if senpai can have some carefree time with the rest of the club before senpai gets married, okay?"

With a touch of sarcasm that really brings the depth of his anger home to Kaoru, Kyouya says, "I must not have been thinking along the same lines, considering that I'd included you in the club."

"We'll still be in contact," Kaoru argues, suddenly tired.

Kyouya gives him a pointed look generally calculated to make the recipient feel extremely foolish. "And I suppose until you intervened, Haruhi and I were going to break off our friendship at a moment's notice?"

Kaoru doesn't respond.

"Yes, I see now," Kyouya continues, simmering away. "My friendship with Haruhi was unfortunately nearing its end, hence it was critical that we spend time together to celebrate its last moments even at the expense of leaving you behind."

Again Kaoru doesn't know what to do. He says nothing.

Mori sticks his head in briefly. "Kyouya, bathroom's free."

Kyouya signals his acknowledgement, and Mori shuts the door behind him while he, in all likelihood, goes off to aforementioned bathroom to ready himself.

"Kaoru," Kyouya starts, and seems to think better of it. He follows it up with a sigh so deep that it makes Kaoru feel a little bad.

"I'm really sorry," Kaoru says meekly, spurred to apology.

Disbelieving snort of laughter. "No you aren't." Kyouya pinches the bridge of his nose. "You regret nothing and you wouldn't change anything. If it were possible for you to relive the past few days, you would make exactly the same decisions as you have, except perhaps this time you would try even harder to conceal the relevant facts from us."

He's a hundred percent right, of course. Kaoru has enough self-awareness to know it.

"Do you want to know why Mori-senpai utterly refuses to have you involved in Q.E.D.?" Kyouya says conversationally. He lets out a low chuckle. "For a few seconds I thought Mori-senpai would think that _I _was the one who told you, and take me to task over it."

Kaoru winces.

"It's because you do this," Kyouya explains, broadly indicating Kaoru's person. "You habitually do this – you forget that we care for you as much as you care for us. From that moment that the three of us decided to take action, we were prepared to use each other as necessary. This means that each of us are wholly responsible for managing ourselves and our own affairs well – each of us will be pulling our own weight, and none of us should have to cover for another. Ironically, because you are always trying to help other people bear their burdens, it means that we have to ensure that you can actually bear the burden that you choose to take on. Do you see? Tell me, Kaoru, has it never occurred to you that when we exclude you, it is because we are worried about your welfare rather than unconvinced about your competence?"

"I… I know," Kaoru mutters.

"Do you really?" Kyouya asks, amused now.

"Yeah. Sorry for getting in the way."

Kyouya goggles at him.

"… What?"

"How swiftly you prove that you don't really know after all. When Hikaru first informed me about what you'd done, I instantly knew the right thing to say to you to make you understand. But it is fraught with far more difficulty to make you understand than it is to simply pull away from you and hope that the decreased affection will mean that you will no longer be inclined to give things up for me." He turns to Kaoru. "Really, I should have known better than that. In fact, I knew, but I was furious at you."

"That's what Mori-senpai said," Kaoru mumbles.

"I'm not surprised," Kyouya says dryly. "He was quite vocal about the way I was handling you."

"Vocal? Mori-senpai?" Kaoru laughs feebly.

Kyouya nods. "That he said anything at all. Ordinarily he would have let us quarrel it out in due course, therefore he must have thought it was very wrong."

"Mori-senpai's probably right. I don't understand what I'm supposed to understand."

"This," Kyouya sighs yet again. With both hands he clasps Kaoru's face with extraordinary tenderness, and with his characteristic confidence he says something hugely uncharacteristic. _"You are important to me."_

Kaoru freezes, his heart stopping before resuming an erratic skip.

After what must have been an eternity, he finds his tongue. "Huh?"

"I know you heard me the first time," Kyouya says with a small teasing smile. "Making me repeat it would just be playing annoyingly hard to get."

Horribly confused, Kaoru gibbers nonsensically, "Wait! Huh? _Huh?!_"

"That was what I should have said to you straightaway, wasn't it? It was what you needed to hear – you, Kaoru, who for reasons beyond me persists in thinking of yourself as dispensable. Now will you ensure that you are in the States over the vacation?"

"But," Kaoru splutters, inexplicably flushed and a bit too warm. "But...! _What?!_ I said, that's not the point, the point is that I am committed to my family's – "

"And you will make both happen," Kyouya concludes with finality.

Kaoru gawks at him, mind and pulse racing. _What is wrong with me?_

"Make both happen. I accept that you cannot be there for the entire duration – that can't be helped. But you can find a way to be there for at least a part of it. Surely you can accommodate this request?"

"But I – " He isn't really thinking; he's replying – contradicting – on autopilot.

"This is what _I want_. Are you refusing me?" Kyouya uses the ultimatum.

With great hesitance, Kaoru says, "No."

"Excellent," Kyouya says with a tinge of triumph. "I will expect you there. Keep me updated on the dates on which you will join us."

Speechless, Kaoru watches his senior exit the room with a vaguely familiar, way too fluttery feeling in his stomach. Valiantly he tells himself that it is an aftereffect of being shell-shocked, except that Kyouya turns around at the door to smile at him – a mixture of captivatingly smooth arrogance and the sheer pleasure of victory – a smile to infuse such radiance in those beautiful eyes the colour of mercury, and Kaoru…

Kaoru can't pretend that he has no idea what this feeling is.


	27. Chronicle: Takashi

**CHRONICLE: TAKASHI**

**The Champion and The Child**

.

Yes! where is he, the champion and the child  
>Of all that's great or little, wise or wild?<br>Whose game was empires, and whose stakes were thrones;  
>Whose table, earth – whose dice were human bones?<br>― Lord Byron, _The Age of Bronze_, Stanza III

.

Morinozuka Takashi is a guy who has never made his mother worry.

He is one of only a handful of people worldwide who can swear to this in a court of law or before the gods without perjuring himself or being struck by divine lightning. This alone makes him a prince among men.

Yet, such a singularly phenomenal fact is but the tip of the iceberg in any examination of the Morinozuka heir.

For every human being on earth, the entire matter of birth and family is a giant, unpredictable cosmic lottery. Nobody gets to choose their family members, and everybody wants and needs different things from their loved ones anyway. However, every once in a long, long, _long_ while, all the stars will align to produce something uniquely perfect.

Here are a few things that all the Morinozukas and their disciples know:

1) In every way, manner and form, Takashi is the child his parents wanted.  
>2) In every way, manner and form, he is the sibling Satoshi wanted.<br>3) In every way, manner and form, he is the Master that all the disciples wanted.

This is no mean feat.

To understand Takashi, it is first necessary to understand his parents and his heritage. It is not possible to speak of his parents and his heritage in isolation from the Haninozuka clan. Takashi himself has a very strong grasp of the ancestry of his own family and those of his pedigreed friends, because he has a lifelong love of history. Those who don't know history are doomed to repeat it, after all.

Takashi knows that he and his friends are products of their upbringing and lineage, and several aspects of their relationships contain echoes of the past in the most fascinating ways possible. Their surnames are loaded with the force of history, and the burden of heritage can be crushing.

The Morinozuka name is long associated with honourable servitude, unmatched loyalty and unflinching integrity. These are not just words – they are concepts to be meditated on and reinforced with daily discipline. It is not in the nature of Morinozukas to thirst for power – they neither desire the amassing of more material goods, nor do they boast about their accomplishments. This is the root source of their unimpeachable characters: because they do not crave for more, they do not feel the need to resort to underhanded means, and because they are unafraid to lose what they have, they always retain the ability to speak up for what is right. Making peace with the self is highly regarded in the family code.

The historical formation of the original Haninozuka-Morinozuka alliance had been all about this, back when the head of the Haninozuka shogunate was a supreme warlord and the head of the Morinozuka family but a tiny speck of a lowly soldier in the vast dominion of Haninozuka lands. The question of who will guard the guardians was answered one day, when Haninozukas and Morinozukas found themselves able to restrain the other from their worst impulses, thereby proving themselves wonderfully compatible with each other.

Haninozukas are cunning tacticians; this was true then and remains true now. They tend to radiate such invincibility that it is hard for everyone, including themselves, to remember that they are still just mortal, and to them, all is fair in love and war. Such a stance means that the Haninozukas are capable of shocking cruelty, and have been responsible for a good number of truly horrible acts in the name of conquest; at the height of their military campaigns, their army was slaughtering tens of thousands per day. For this reason, Takashi had been immensely relieved that Mitsukuni was never in the running for Haruhi's heart, as it would have been nothing short of disastrous if he were really serious about her. Mitsukuni doesn't lose well because he almost never loses, and the famed Haninozuka 'Anything Goes' style is just a nicer way of saying 'we play dirty when we have to'.

Yet for all the darkness in Mitsukuni, for the most part Takashi is certain that the average Haninozuka wields power better than the average Suou or Ootori.

The critical difference lies in the way that Haninzozukas ordinarily come to power, versus the way that Suous or Ootoris reach the same position. Haninozukas are often on the throne by virtue of their own might – they like to be present in battle to secure victory themselves, hence they will always direct their own troops from the frontline. It follows that the masses usually have an idea of how much power they have earned and how they earned it, and they cannot exercise that power away from the public eye. Over the years, the Haninozuka clan has become accustomed to being both the face of power as well as its wielder, unlike the Suous and Ootoris, who are more comfortable with wielding power while being in a position where they will not have to account for its use – that is, they enjoy being the power behind the throne. The masses don't know much about the political machinations behind the scenes, and so those two families frequently get away with far too much by arranging for someone else to take the fall – the crimes of Tamaki's and Kyouya's ancestors are almost definitely as terrible as those of Mitsukuni's, except that Mitsukuni's family has to face up to it.

The point is: if there _had_ to be a complex web of love relationships in their club, the scenario that they'd found themselves in was actually the best they could have hoped for. For this Suou is anything but average, and there had been no Haninozuka, no Ootori, and no Morinozuka tossed into the mix.

Nothing inspires more dread in Takashi than the idea of Mitsukuni and Kyouya fighting over someone or something – that Takashi doesn't include himself as a competitor is not a matter of arrogance. Indeed it is a matter of individual taste: because Mitsukuni and Kyouya share a number of core personality traits, the things that they need, want, value and respect in other people are also rather similar. For example, they both need partners who are able to hold them back when they go too far, they both want absolute devotion and someone who is willing to let them take charge for the majority of the time, they both value a degree of deviousness and unconventionality in their closest associates, and they both respect quiet strength and – surprising though it is to many – a person with a truly good heart.

Takashi prefers someone who is honest, unmotivated by greed, with the clarity and bravery needed to function as the voice of reason amidst chaos. He loves Haruhi, and it would be a blatant lie to claim that he hadn't experienced the agonising apprehension of knowing he would see the day when she would be somebody else's, or that he hadn't deeply wished she was his to protect for the rest of their lives. Truth be told, Mitsukuni probably knows better than Takashi himself about why Takashi hadn't acted on his feelings. Ultimately, Takashi would only have failed Haruhi if she had ended up with a lesser man, and since she has not, Takashi is content with how everything has turned out. Contentment is also highly regarded in their family.

Apart from Mitsukuni, the one other who had noticed Takashi's confusion and struggle is his mother. At first glance, Takashi frequently appears to be very much his father's son, and given that Morinozuka Akira has a propensity to talk a fair bit (especially around Yorihisa-ojisama), it causes people to wonder about Takashi's overall stoicism and disinterest towards social discourse. Some of them even speculate that Takashi must secretly be very chatty when alone with Mitsukuni.

And then, they meet his mother.

The clever ones will immediately realise that Takashi is, in fact, very much his mother's baby. Morinozuka Shizuka is a mystery to all but her own family and the Haninozuka family. She is the lone bastion of femininity in their intensely masculine household, and she copes with all the silliness around her with the admirable composure of a Zen master. Such mystery and composure conspire to give her a mystical aura, especially as she is often found meditating or studying in the spacious hall containing the family shrine. On account of her observational and analytical skill Shizuka is very rarely wrong about anything, and this has led to a belief that Takashi's mother possesses magical powers, especially in the realm of divination. For these reasons she is nicknamed 'Miko-san' by Tsukishi-obsama and Yuzuha-san, a nickname that Shizuka accepts quite reluctantly and grudgingly.

Like mother like son, she is prone to monosyllabic answers and muted reactions, and her capacity to mind her own business is beyond human. This makes her the confidante of choice for many, as one does not feel judged or insecure when entrusting secrets to her – as a result, the Morinozuka home receives far more guests than would normally be expected of a family with more taciturn members than most, and they have cemented their reputation as providers of a patient listening ear and wise counsel.

Takashi had thought himself quite lacking in this department as he continually attempts to emulate his mother, until that night Hikaru had shown up at his door with enough luggage to store all of Takashi's wardrobe and more. After Hikaru had gotten settled in, Akira had clapped Takashi on one shoulder with the weighty pride of a satisfied father, and Shizuka had smiled at him and touched her hand briefly to his cheek with a softly spoken, "Oh, Takashi," and Takashi couldn't sleep a wink from his overwhelming awe at the faith his parents show in him.

Later, when his mother found out that Hikaru's problem was related to his feelings for Haruhi, she had looked at Takashi with such compassion that it hurt and soothed him all at once. Because months ago when she'd met Haruhi, she had glanced at the girl and turned towards her son, and shown that same understanding conveyed through the motherly caress of hair and a light breath of, "Oh, _Takashi_," and Takashi can't remember any time in the last decade when he'd wanted to cry as much as that.

Takashi's personal definition of success is to become a man who embodies the best of his father and mother. Akira is a family man from top to toe, slow to anger yet quick to discipline, and he takes his responsibilities as a husband and father extremely seriously. Yorihisa-ojisama tells Takashi that his father used to open doors and carry things for his mother long before this type of western gentlemanly behaviour was introduced into their society, and that his father would take his mother's advice over that of Yorihisa-ojisama's in a heartbeat. Because Yorihisa-ojisama had mentioned it with a hint of grumpy, teasing jealousy, Takashi had not needed to question the veracity of these statements. As a father, Akira keeps a sharp eye on Takashi's and Satoshi's grades and school activities, as well as their daily mental and physical training. He spars with his sons on a regular basis, and springs pop quizzes on the topics that they are currently studying.

In Takashi's estimation, his mother is the wisest person on earth. She can unerringly discern when to speak and when not to, when to act and when not to – in battle she has been known to take out her opponents with one precisely aimed attack, and she was still thrashing Takashi for about a year even after he finally surpassed her height at age fourteen. Not that Takashi thinks size means anything given the regularity with which Mitsukuni debunks that myth, but his mother is very tall and imposing, unlike Tsukishi-obasama, who is short and fair. These two ladies' personalities are like night and day – whereas Tsukishi-obasama generally leaps into the fray with somewhat unholy delight whenever his father and Yorihisa-ojisama start to trash talk each other about who has the better son, his mother nearly always avoids such banter by a blank, resigned acknowledgement along the lines of, "Ah."

Then, she always arranges for a plate of some traditional Japanese food to be prepared, and this invariably distracts the men sufficiently to bring the unwinnable argument to a swift end. His mother loves food, which makes this a win-win scenario for her; Tsukishi-obasama is lean to the point of twiggish for a reason, and will generally send a number of censorious looks in Shizuka's direction for spoiling her fun throughout the duration of the impromptu meal. Like their men, they occasionally take to the dojo to settle their (infrequent) arguments, and like all great warriors, their souls are laid bare in their fighting styles: Tsukishi-obasama is all about speed, evasive dodging, feints and pre-emptive strikes, Shizuka is about impenetrable defence, core strength, clean movements and decisive blows.

It is their families' custom that the winner of Haninozuka versus Morinozuka fights will have the right to follow his/her way. Yorihisa-ojisama then habitually cracks his joke about how the only way to matchmake a Haninozuka or a Morinozuka is to have them duel their future spouse, followed by a suggestion that Mitsukuni or Takashi might be interested in fighting this girl or that girl.

… But what if the girl Takashi loves has no athleticism to speak of at all?

Yasuchika once asked this pertinent question of what would happen should they fall for someone who simply is not made to take up arms, or who can only do so minimally like Mitsukuni's and Yasuchika's beloved grandmother, the revered Haninozuka Mitsue. Filial as always, Yorihisa-ojisama had decreed that clearly women like his mother belong to another league entirely, and their keen insight is an asset that well benefits all men.

Unable to help it, Takashi had thought about Haruhi. That had earned him a knowing smile from his mother before she had to turn away to calm his father and brother, who had worked themselves into a grand mood by proudly telling Yorihisa-ojisama and Yasuchika about their powerful _and_ intelligent wife/mother, as if Yorihisa-ojisama hadn't also managed to find a wife with such qualities.

However, it's not that Takashi found it silly. On the contrary. If, like Satoshi, he shares his father's disposition, he would have been right there with them.

For a woman who doesn't talk much, Shizuka is regarded by all to be a lady of letters. She reads voraciously, and keeps a large number of chests filled with her forays into the world of the written word. As such she has a broad range of reference and knowledge, with the capacity to provide sound analysis on nearly every current affair and global or national issue. Her poetry and stories should have seen her published and wildly successful had she created her works for commercial purposes; when Takashi and Satoshi were children, she was the author of their bedtime stories and fables, and Akira would read it to them nightly. Yuzuha-san is a huge fan, and naturally she has been gunning for Shizuka's works for as long as they have existed. Hitachiins can be very persuasive, and they have edited so many quality publications that Takashi finds he is inclined to approve should such a venture ever happen, even though there are consequences of handing over these things to them.

"… ne, Mori-senpai?" Hikaru smirks unpleasantly at Tamaki as he leans on Takashi ingratiatingly.

"No!" Tamaki howls shrilly, pitching himself across the interior of the limousine to get at Hikaru. Mitsukuni laughs, because Mitsukuni is happy and because Mitsukuni thinks almost everything is funny.

Takashi catches Tamaki so that his juniors won't smash together and give each other a nosebleed. "Be careful," he says, placing Tamaki on Hikaru's lap because there's nowhere else to put him safely.

Predictably, Hikaru wriggles away with such haste that he crashes into Kaoru on the other side. "Mori-senpai!" he protests accusingly, before apologising profusely to poor Kaoru when he gasps sharply from the pain of being slammed with such force.

It was not Takashi's intention to cause such a hard collision, but he is nonetheless eased when Kaoru seems to snap out of the daze he's been in since they left the mansion. He looks troubled, but Kyouya looks pleased, and Takashi is worried.

"Oww…" Kaoru mewls, the first sound he's made in a while.

"Sorry, I'm sorry!" Hikaru wails. "Tono, damn it, this is your fault!"

"Wha – but – !" Tamaki reacts instinctually, and segues into his deep love for all of them just as automatically. "I'm sorry, Kaoru!" He crouches down and inches over to where Kaoru is, squeezing one of Kaoru's knees. "Sorry."

Kaoru smiles weakly, distractedly. "It's nothing."

Mitsukuni's eyebrows go up by half a centimetre.

_I don't know_, Takashi tells him, feeling most disappointed in himself for not questioning Kyouya in the bath. Kyouya had given off the distinct impression that everything was now fine, a conclusion that Kaoru evidently disagrees with.

This is bad. At least one of them should know.

This is why Takashi hadn't wanted to involve the twins or Tamaki with QED. Mitsukuni is able to help Kyouya without much guilt or sadness though it may tear the Ootori family apart; Takashi feels guilty about it, and he knows that the juniors would, too – all the time.

Mitsukuni emits a sympathetic, amused noise, and asks, "So Kao-chan has the same opinion as Hika-chan?"

Complete bewilderment. What's more, a significantly sluggish reply. "… Eh?"

Deliberately, Mitsukuni refuses to clarify. "You know, about what Hika-chan and Tama-chan were talking about earlier."

Kaoru blinks in rapid succession, discomfited. "Uh, heh," he laughs nervously, and recovers fluidly with, "I have no idea, really; I wasn't listening. These days I have to tune them out because they're always flirting." He grins at Hikaru. "Too much lovey-dovey stuff."

"What lovey-dovey stuff?!" Hikaru demands indignantly, but neither he nor Tamaki are sidetracked like Kaoru had wished. He huffs, a sound of impatience and stress, and turns to Kyouya with pleading eyes. "What's going on again, Kyouya-senpai?"

Placidly, Kyouya regards Kaoru. "Do you want to tell them, or shall I?"

Kaoru obscures most of his face with his fringe and hands. In a small voice, he says, "Senpai can do it."

So Kyouya does, and Tamaki is aghast.

"… therefore, I have informed our kouhai that his presence in America is not optional, and he has agreed to be there," Kyouya finishes with a satisfied, catlike smile.

Faintly enough to be easily missed, Mitsukuni favours Kyouya with a smile in return – finally they have sorted this out and gotten Kaoru where they want him. Tamaki is at a bit of a loss; before he had time to be properly angry, the event had already passed and he can't find an outlet for his feelings, leaving him spluttering. Hikaru simply looks relieved.

Kaoru lifts his head at last, his features exactly reflecting that of his twin's. "Yeah… Yeah. It's okay, everything's okay. It'll all work out. If you wanna join them for the whole trip, you can, Hikaru. I'll talk to Mother and everything's gonna be fine."

Relief, _relief_. The relief is palpable. The entire limo is thrumming with relief, and Kaoru is most relieved of all. There is a general feeling of resolution. As Kyouya was speaking, the tension gradually left Kaoru's body because he is no longer pressured by the weight of secrets. That makes sense, right?

But his expression disturbs Takashi, and Takashi can't put his finger on it. His heart clenches uncomfortably at the sight of those softly smiling amber eyes hooded by glamorously long eyelashes. _Where_ has he seen that expression before, and what does it _mean_? Takashi glances at Mitsukuni, and Mitsukuni doesn't seem to think anything's wrong. That's good. That's excellent.

"I'm sorry for being stupid," Kaoru says with all the rueful sweetness he alone of the club members is capable of, sheepishly resting his head on Hikaru's shoulder in an subconscious gesture for support and comfort, and it is horribly, horribly _cute_.

Something in Takashi lurches in nausea and warning, and it is not due to the movement of the car. Takashi has long noticed that when Kaoru is around those he loves, he has a tendency to default to adorableness to divert other people's attention like Mitsukuni, to induce affection in others such as to make it absolutely criminal to harm either of them. Unfortunately even though Mitsukuni uses it himself, this is one of the few moves that works back on him too, as Mitsukuni is highly susceptible to sweet and cute things. Additionally Kaoru is not actually faking it, further compromising Mitsukuni's ability to grasp that occasionally Kaoru uses the sweetness as a coping mechanism, an honest mask for his less palatable emotions.

Worst of all, however, must be that Kaoru is the one who possesses the most and strongest traditionally feminine traits of their group. Yes, their entire group _including_ Haruhi. This is significant on so many levels, not least of which because Kaoru descends from a long line of women who have flourished against tremendous odds. Those of them who know that Haruhi is biologically female seem to have difficulty picking this out – almost as if they've been compromised by their knowledge – but their customers certainly have no problems distinguishing the truth.

Takashi had needed his mother to point this out to him, and he has since realised that whenever threatened, apart from the adorableness Kaoru also often manages to slip into a manner that is subtly and somehow inexplicably more female – like the Jungian anima flaring to life – especially in situations when he is alone with the five of them, five _male_ members of the host club. He does it when he wants them to listen to him, when he wants to win them over, when he wants them to turn this way or turn that way… in other words, when he wants to hold sway over them.

And what it does is, of course – Takashi briefly glimpses his friends, and yes – Tamaki and Hikaru cave to Kaoru and forgive him instantly, and Mitsukuni and Kyouya follow shortly. Takashi himself balks at upsetting his beloved friend and junior at the best of times, and when Kaoru looks as gentle and defenceless as this Takashi would just feel like a monstrous man to treat him poorly at all.

Thus before has Takashi confided in his mother. He is far from the only person to have unwittingly opened doors and pulled out chairs for Kaoru. Yuzuha-san's foreign friends and contacts typically greet Kaoru with kisses, as they'd greet Yuzuha-san herself… yet kiss Hikaru only when he expresses willingness. With the light of amusement glittering in her eyes like a mischievous secret, his mother's sole remark had been, _"Oh, Takashi."_

A few minutes later she'd added, "That child is a Hitachiin."

Yes, the family that has produced more great beauties than any other family, women who could and did give Cleopatra a run for her money with their luxurious living and the number of influential men they have seduced and enslaved. Hitachiins are renowned as people to be pampered, protected, cherished, _loved_ – people on whom the finest things of life and immense wealth should be lavished. One does not keep a Hitachiin unless one has means, and even then they may not stay.

The power they wield is in a different arena compared to most of the brood of students who have ever populated the halls of Ouran – Hitachiins control those who control power. Men have worshipped them, and men have done everything out of love for them. Of their schoolmates, how many of them can safely claim that their forefathers have escaped the lure of a Hitachiin? The one time a Morinozuka ever defied and abandoned his Haninozuka was to elope with a Hitachiin – although he came back voluntarily to regain his honour via seppuku, and she too committed ritual suicide when she realised what he'd done.

But just as they have had men at their mercy, they have also been at the mercy of men – the Hitachiin family history is filled with passion, ambition, blood and tragedy, as is only to be expected when they have been fiercely desired from beginning to end, from their princess-like coquettishness until their inevitable maturation into queenly resplendence. Using only the surnames that exist in their club is sufficient to illustrate the violent injustice that awaits them should their luck fail them: in the Edo period, the Hitachiin from whom Takashi's friends are descended was an imperial concubine to a figurehead emperor who held virtually no power in a court dominated by shogun, daimyo and officials who formed the ruling class. She caught the amorous attention of the eldest Haninozuka and the eldest Suou, both youths who were already heading their respective families, and because those families were powerful the two of them took to visiting her and wilfully consorting with her – they'd successfully gotten away with it even after she fell pregnant, but catastrophe struck when she gave birth to a boy. They both wanted her for their own, and each believed the child was his, each of them needed an heir and so did the emperor, this child would have been the oldest son of any of these three men; the humiliation dealt to the emperor was unspeakable, and the other jealous concubines and court officials had crept out of their murky caves shrieking and braying about the disgrace, the _shame_.

Somebody had to pay.

And even though the problem arose because the men lacked control over their sexual appetites for her, it was easier to condemn someone without a voice, without defences, with the guilt of adultery stamped all over her once swollen abdomen. Whoever the father of the child was, the child could not be killed outright, and this also saved his mother from being paraded around town prior to execution as nobody wanted her crimes to be publicly aired. He could not, however, save her from death, and she was duly beheaded. As for the child, his official paternity was stated to be the emperor, but "by reason of a harsh winter, the child became terribly ill and died". The Hitachiin legacy lived on by virtue of the head of the Haninozukas stealthily rescuing his deceased lover's first child, a daughter, and squirreling her away until such time as she could emerge again. What a legacy it is, too, for there are records even from the Heian period of unnamed ladies of court to whom the modern Hitachiins can trace their ancestry. Their dynasty is very, very old, but they do not peak; they never reach the heights of glory attained by their male counterparts, but they also do not diminish – they are always there, and they have always survived.

_All Hitachiins_, his mother once said, _are survivors. Do not let their manner and splendour fool you. They were women who managed to carve out a place for themselves even amidst extreme patriarchy, and see how tall they stand today still. We Morinozuka are conquerors, Takashi, but you will do well to remember that survivors often outlast conquerors._

Such tales are the tip of the iceberg regarding Hitachiin love affairs. They have plenty of them, whether they or their lovers happen to be married or not, and whether the relationship is heterosexual or homosexual or not. Apparently a handful of Hitachiin males used to be involved with the warrior classes, the daimyo and samurai, which obviously potentially include Mitsukuni's family and Takashi's own family.

This abundance of affairs leads directly to the creation of the Hitachiins' ultimate treasure, the key source of their power alongside their parties. They have been showered in jewellery, antiques, art, tokens of ardour, but the prize above all is: stories. Life stories told through daily conversations or condensed into snippets of everyday interaction. Men told them things they wouldn't tell their wives, women told them things they wouldn't tell their husbands, emperors and nobility whispered secrets to them in the privacy between two sheets. Literacy accompanied their privilege, and they soon established a tradition of recording _everything_ – as the years passed, their archive grew…

Hikaru and Kaoru call it a library, though Takashi suspects it's really more of a vault. The 'library' in their mansion is a collection of books like everybody else's libraries – this vault, this distinctive Library, no one knows where it is. People speculate, and people search. They aren't even sure which Hitachiins are permitted to know – the incumbent head definitely knows; Hikaru and Kaoru might know it now, or it may be revealed to them only when they come of age. In all likelihood, only Hitachiins by birth will know of its location. They've been hurt by their lovers and they've hurt their lovers enough to refrain from entrusting this to foreign hands. It is a mark of their persuasion that they can tempt a person into divulging information even when it is known that they will record it. Maybe it's because those people wanted to be truly known in a way, to be properly remembered for who they are. This theory suggests that they considered their Hitachiin lover to be the one who truly knew them – and _that_, Takashi knows, is a weapon like a sword is a weapon, is a shield like an armour is a shield.

This is why Takashi's mother will not (yet?) give Yuzuha-san her writings – because the accounts in Yuzuha-san's vault are personal, honest and gaping, and giving your work to them is equivalent to giving yourself. It affords a curious sense of validation and eternity – immortality through the ceaselessness of a Hitachiin's dedication – and word has it that the Hitachiins give their solemn honour in exchange. They will deal with your work as per your instructions, or do with it as they see fit if none are issued, and thus their family has published posthumously autobiographies and diaries of various important figures on their behalf. Takashi dabbles in writing too, courtesy of his mother's guidance, and being someone who has actually produced work, he is able to understand how daunting this prospect is.

Sure enough, now…

Takashi finds he cannot bring himself to push the matter in the face of Kaoru's apology. Sometimes, Takashi almost thinks if Haruhi were male and the rest of them were female, either Kaoru or Hikaru would have won. Sometimes, Takashi thinks that Kaoru has a much higher mastery over his ancestral power than he is willing to display, something beyond the falsified version he employs in club, and wonders how devastating he would be if he let himself embrace it.

After all it is not boasting for Takashi to say that he and his host club mates are all accomplished at attracting girls, but out of the biological males only one of them also actively knows how to attract boys, and unwittingly _does_ – Hikaru is bound to throw a fit and a flurry of punches if he knows the way a good portion of the school sports jocks view his twin. Apart from the ogling by the martial artists and the footballers/baseball players' murmurs along the lines of 'I'd hit _that_' in the bathrooms when they think Takashi has left after practice, they are rude but haven't entirely crossed the line into crude, and they know better than to behave like hormonally charged cavemen before Mitsukuni unless they want to have broken limbs. This doesn't mean they would shy away from making advances towards Kaoru and/or Haruhi if an opening presents itself, and Kyouya would never admit it to their juniors even though part of the reason for his tight controls over host club recruitment is to protect not just the girls but _them_ as well from the unwanted attentions of people who would seek to abuse their membership.

The school population seems to acknowledge that Haruhi and Kaoru have the most, well, feminine looks or qualities in their club, which makes them appealing to people of either gender. It's curious how the male half shows more sexual interest in Kaoru than Haruhi and the female half has it reversed. Haruhi is quite a fantastic prospect for the girls – as a commoner "he" would marry into their families, and "he" is natural, resolute and practical, with a strong work ethic and a bright future in the learned profession of law. But the girls weren't brought up to be pushy, so they're really hoping that Haruhi would notice and take action first "like a real man". For the guys, logically it would be easier to lead Haruhi on because "he" is a commoner and has next to no power beside anyone in their school, thus when they have to marry or when they want to dump "him", it will be a fuss-free process – Takashi (and Mitsukuni) suspect they prefer Kaoru because Kaoru has a feisty quality, adventurous and rebellious and extravagant, and as a Hitachiin he is always an indulgence… that is why those boys want to take the risk and fool around with him rather than Haruhi, who is studious, hardworking, intelligent, unassuming and reasonable, the sort of grounded qualities that their future wives would have anyway.

There is no quicker way than this to make Mitsukuni _fume_. In a nanosecond he snaps into his demon mode if he overhears any such comments about their juniors – he puts up with the lecherous, privileged idiots who think this way only because he can't beat people up for no visible reason. The guys watch themselves around Kaoru and Haruhi when the rest of the club is present, especially if Hikaru is there for either of them – in fact, Hikaru is their most effective protection, more so than Tamaki and Kyouya, because everyone knows Hikaru has no qualms about pummelling them to a pulp on the spot. Whenever Kaoru comes to the school dojo it is with Hikaru, whenever Haruhi drops by it is with at least someone else (again, usually Hikaru), so probably none of the others know about this. Except Kyouya, who may not always have known but certainly discovered it for himself that time when they stumbled across the hot springs. Despite repeated refusals, a group of guys persistently extended invitations to Haruhi to join them for a soak in the water; Takashi and Mitsukuni kept trying discreetly to put themselves between Kaoru and the other guys – it was clear that Kyouya had caught on when he too positioned himself strategically around their oblivious junior, who'd had his head in the clouds worrying about Hikaru's and Tamaki's absence.

With his chameleon-ish versatility, Kaoru does have a fair share of girls who like him in spite of his divergent hosting style, but among the hosts he rates lowest for marriageability. Takashi knows this because he assists Kyouya during busy periods and he's been though Kyouya's records. The girls think of Kaoru as a pretty boy and they adore him, but they keep their hands off him and have their crushes on Haruhi, which drives Tamaki absolutely insane. Kyouya is of the opinion that they don't register Kaoru as much because they would like to_ be_ Kaoru rather than to have him, and also because Hikaru is explicit and uninhibited in expressing his possessiveness of the younger twin – Kaoru has to be shared with Hikaru, and the complication is that the elder brother is rather stubborn, oft insensitive and swift to interfere. Takashi may never have been in a romance, but he knows that people in relationships need time and space to work things out between themselves and the presence of third parties generally exacerbates the problem… especially if someone has no clue that he is a third party, nor is he willing to accept that he is one.

Takashi cannot protect Mitsukuni from all harm and hurt; Mitsukuni can give his heart to whoever he wants to, and if this person should choose to fling it at the ground and stomp brutally on it, that does not give Takashi the right to go after her and exact revenge. Samurai may have been authorised by law to wipe out entire enemy families to restore honour, but in truth it was barbaric then and barbaric now. Many a time when meeting the new girlfriend or boyfriend of a friend, Takashi has seen his classmates and associates issuing threats like, "Don't you dare hurt him/her, or else!" and such – but what purpose does it serve? It is presumptuous and invasive, and the harsh truth of life is: two people together are bound to hurt each other sooner or later, whether accidental or not. It _will_ happen, and it doesn't even need to be caused by an action. Takashi's father once had to adjudicate a difficult quarrel between two disciples in their dojo, and he wanted Takashi's mother to positively state her support for his decision – Takashi's mother hadn't known that her husband wanted that reinforcement from her and she kept silent all throughout. It hurt him that she hadn't backed up her man, and later that night they had a heated discussion (by Morinozuka standards) about it; Takashi only found out because he'd woken up to go to the toilet.

That's why the only thing that Takashi can and will say to Mitsukuni's future spouse is, "Mitsukuni is important to me. Please treat him well." He would stay out of Mitsukuni's marriage and vice versa – Takashi and his wife will not have to obtain Mitsukuni's approval for everything – but nobody can say that for sure about Hikaru and Kaoru.

The twins differ from the rest of them as they host in a pair, though the contrast runs deeper than that – Hikaru performs the same role as them and Kaoru usually doesn't. Mitsukuni once noted that while all of them, the individual hosts, engage their customers, speaking to them, creating opportunities to exhibit the characteristics of their host type, Kaoru really only needs to engage Hikaru. Hikaru has to talk to the customers, crack jokes, entertain, be naughty, daring, bold. He constructs situations where he can say something salacious to Kaoru, then Kaoru reacts. Same for the rest of them – they need to ask questions of their customers, reply, be charming, et cetera. Even Takashi, Mitsukuni says, is engaging them by his silence – the message is: I am here to listen, I will be your rock. Kaoru can stare lovingly at Hikaru for the whole two hours and he would have done his job. He has done so in the past.

This is because Kaoru's role is to be a representation of the customer – he is a recipient of romantic feelings from another, and he plies his trade as an object of desire. The rest of them court their customers; Kaoru is courted in front of the customers. During hours, Kaoru actually spends much of that time sitting there passively, made up and gorgeous like a model, smiling, pouting, blushing, batting his eyelashes, giggling, a dash of the occasional flirtatious whine – he acts more like the customers than like them, the hosts. He is not meant to pay attention to the customers. He is meant to be lovestruck, as lovestruck as the customers are, and following this reasoning he should not long turn away from Hikaru. Kaoru is not meant to look like he has space for anyone else in his world because the customers _don't want_ that.

See, Kaoru is beautiful in a way that some customers can only dream of being. Of course Takashi thinks his other friends are beautiful too, though it is quite rational that their customers, females, would use only Kaoru or Haruhi as a comparison yardstick as they have no wish to be male – they want to _receive_ male attention, and really only those two receive the type of male attention they want. All of them in Ouran may have won the familial lottery in terms of wealth and name, but not all of them have won in terms of genetics... The customers who do not feel comfortable in their own skin, who have low self-esteem, are prone to a number of habits – they overspend, using money to compensate for their perceived lack of attractiveness, and they project their princess fantasy on somebody who they think deserves to live out the life that they want; they project it on someone who they think doesn't need the validation that they need because he is so outwardly perfect.

And the pronoun is 'he', because they often choose Kaoru. It's terribly ironic, as Kaoru is capable of exemplifying this ideal because he himself shares their fear and their worthlessness; he would never believe himself to be a specimen of perfection especially if he judges himself against his seniors, readily though he believes perfection of others, and he is the club member who most needs validation – it may be that they recognise this in him and want to be reassured like he does? Haruhi is blessed in the realm of genetics but she does not come across as princessy – if anything she is the pauper girl who meets the rich prince charming who falls for her and changes her life, which is a fantasy that is undeniably intriguing but not one that the customers would honestly like to have as their reality.

In this manner, Kaoru plays the part of the girl they want to be. Like them, Princess Kaoru has no great worries or burdens; like them, Princess Kaoru was born into privilege and leads an opulent, enviable life. Like them, Princess Kaoru is filled with extraordinary dreams and a need to love and be loved wholeheartedly. _Unlike_ them, she is the epitome of their ideal, part ingénue, part vamp and all enchanting. Unlike them, she is cared for by a steadfast elder brother who can barely resist her despite their blood relation, along with a circle of male friends who constitute some of the best marriage prospects for their generation. Unlike them, this Princess is a Hitachiin, and Hitachiin women decide their own destiny.

Takashi knows that Kaoru is fully aware of this based on the way he modifies his host personality ever so slightly depending on the particular group of customers – aligning himself closer to them so they can paint onto him as a blank canvas.

For the customers who are genuinely interested in incest, who enjoy the brothers together, they too cannot escape the allure of that representation, as they want to have Kaoru's perceived security, his protection, his peace. They imagine what it is like to have a person who is their other half, and they dream of what it is like to have such ever-present support and love. They think of the times when they are lonely or anxious, and hunger for the infallible (to them) pillar of twinship.

It is all about need and the satiation of that need. They simultaneously want Kaoru and want to be Kaoru, and stimulating such feelings in others is so very trademark Hitachiin.

Renge-kun thinks that it is symmetry that gives the twins their pull – in truth Kaoru would be as potent hosting with any one of them except Tamaki and Haruhi. Tamaki is unsuitable because Tamaki has the innate ability to make the customer feel like the heroine and Kaoru's presence would detract from the fairy tale that the princess is immersed into, and Haruhi is unsuitable because she wouldn't see the point of Kaoru being there, and might think it silly, which also breaks the spell.

But Mitsukuni is right: beside Kyouya, or Takashi, or Mitsukuni himself, Kaoru would serve the same purpose that he does with Hikaru, albeit with variations on the theme that might even make it new, fresh and exciting.

A lot of girls find it intimidating to designate Kyouya. Kyouya likely cultivates some of it himself in order to increase the amount of time he can spend on other tasks by decreasing his number of customers. It is a rather Ootori trait to instil inadequacy in others whether deliberate or not. To have Kaoru there is to radically change the experience – instead of feeling as though they are being assessed and found wanting, the customers will be able to see that rare side of Kyouya, the hidden kindness under the cool exterior that the girls really want from him. For them it will be like reading a first-person story of how "I" managed to do the impossible by winning Ootori Kyouya.

With Takashi, Mitsukuni opines, it will be a routine highly reminiscent of Yuzuha-san and her husband. Kaoru can be flighty, artistic, demanding, and Takashi can be the calm, quiet, selflessly serving man. Mitsukuni thinks it will be funny for Takashi to be called 'darling', 'dahhling', and to be engulfed with kisses while embroiled in a hurricane of creative activity.

Mitsukuni wants to treat Kaoru like a stuffed toy. At this point, Takashi finally figured out the crux of their bizarre conversation and his cousin's self-serving motive. Mitsukuni is a Haninozuka, and when Haninozukas like things, they are used to making it theirs. Their routine involves Kao-chan being a stuffed toy that comes to life after years of desperate wishing by Mitsukuni, almost like a Pinocchio story with elements of Peter Pan, with emphasis on Kao-chan being innocent, clumsy, inquisitive and easily delighted. Apparently because Kyou-chan had acquired a pet kitten in the form of Kao-chan, Mitsukuni needs to obtain a soft toy… similarly in the form of Kao-chan.

Don't ask, is Takashi's advice.

Maybe now that Kyouya has a real kitten, Mitsukuni will banish the thought.

Anyway, the girls like to hear Mitsukuni's tales of the personal histories and backgrounds that he has meticulously given each plush toy, and they would love to see him teach and spoil a favoured living doll. To his credit, Takashi admits that the routine is inventive and cute, except Mitsukuni got annoyed at him for raising the question of whether Kaoru would be willing to do any of these routines in the first place. Or whether Hikaru is willing. Or whether the vice-president is willing. Or whether the president is willing to let them.

Because, Takashi had explained, Hikaru is good at couching their routine in ambiguous terms that cause it to remain under the umbrella of brotherly love, but if Kaoru acts like that with either he or Kyouya, it'll probably be classified straight under boys' love and what of the considerations, such as the impact on reputation, how people will view Kaoru, what will happen to Hikaru's hosting, and so on and so forth.

Mitsukuni had frowned and left it.

"We're here!" the twins cheer.

As soon as Kaoru exits the vehicle, Mitsukuni takes hold of his wrist like second nature.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

As usual, the six of them make rather an entrance when they arrive.

It is Kyouya's birthday, and Kyouya doesn't enjoy entertaining for nothing, so Tamaki tones it down and they flee to the interior of the restaurant swiftly enough to avoid the clusters of girls and onlookers that had been forming steadily.

They can't avoid the waitstaff, though true to the quality of this establishment, the staff hold fast to their professionalism despite several of them letting their gazes linger on Takashi's friends. One waitress seems especially taken with Tamaki, and her colleagues seem to know it too.

Takashi has arranged everything beforehand, hence they have no need to place any order. Organising the club's birthday dinners is a responsibility he assigned to himself very early on, because like his mother, Takashi is good at observing and deducing a person's tastes in food. Contrary to popular opinion, this has never been Kyouya's job. Kyouya takes over only when it is Takashi's birthday. Otherwise, Takashi prepares the meal and Mitsukuni prepares the cake, and needless to say their teamwork is flawless.

"… has been annoyingly secretive lately!" Tamaki laments. "Maman says he's acting weird when he's with her too. He bursts into fits of giggles for no reason, and he keeps pinching and poking me!"

"He's _your_ father, what do you expect?" Hikaru mutters.

"I don't have anything to do with that," Kaoru disclaims at once, hands up in surrender. "That whole thing about restructuring the club was spontaneous and recent, and I'm not to blame for the genetic defects of your family, Tono."

Tamaki grabs him by cuffing him around the neck with an arm. "What's that supposed to mean!"

Kaoru laughs with impish delight, and everything inside Takashi relaxes.

"I hope it has nothing to do with the Slez medicine project," Kyouya says in an undertone laced with woe. Tamaki swivels in his direction. "Is that so! Ohhh, maybe Otousan has a surprise for us!"

Ignoring the fleeting look of abject horror in his best friend's eyes, Tamaki enthusiastically cries, "Yes, maybe when we head over to France there will be something special waiting for us! What do you think, Kyouya? How exciting!"

Mitsukuni opens his mouth to offer his suggestion for the Chairman's behaviour, and Kaoru shakes his head minutely, effectively silencing him.

_Ah._

The blossoms around Mitsukuni sparkle and gleam. _I see, Kao-chan._

… _But how is it that you know, Kaoru?_

"Hey, Tono, stop torturing Kyouya-senpai," Kaoru snickers along with Hikaru. "And stop wishing for people to do your work for you; weren't_ you_ appointed to this task?" Hikaru clicks his tongue. "This person hasn't even started and already he's trying to take it easy. Stop bumming around, Tono." "Yeah, Tono, shame on you!"

Tamaki yells at them.

They chortle and hoot and jeer, and Kyouya sighs wryly. "You guys…"

The waitress who fancies Tamaki peers in timidly to see what the commotion is about, and Takashi waves to her to indicate that this is business as normal for them.

"… I always do my best!" Tamaki bellows. "I always give it my all!"

"Sometimes that's the problem, you know, Tono," Hikaru gibes.

"All right, stop," Kyouya orders. "My eardrums are hurting."

Tamaki crawls to him pitifully and sobs on his shoulder. "Kaa-san… Okaaaaa-saaaan…"

Opaque and unreadable, Kaoru stares at them while Hikaru rolls around with leftover laughter. After a moment, Kaoru goes to Tamaki to pat him on the head like a puppy. "Come on, Tono, we were just kidding. You know everyone has so much faith in you, and Yuzuru-sama thinks you're perfect."

_There it is again._ Takashi hadn't misheard in the clubroom on Friday.

Tamaki revives in a split second. "Really!"

'_Yuzuru-sama'._

"Come and eat, Tama-chan," Mitsukuni says kindly.

"I don't understand why it is necessary for you two to cause him to cry before every meal."

"Can't help it, Kyouya-senpai." "It's fun, senpai. Even Yuzuru-sama and Shizue-sama can't help it."

_What?_ Takashi frowns to himself. Mitsukuni tightens his grip on Usa-chan.

"It's because of all of you that Obaasama has developed this habit!" Tamaki roars in outrage. "Obaasama wouldn't think it's okay if it weren't for Otousan and you two devils!"

"I very much doubt that the mighty Suou Shizue needs other people to help her identify a gullible idiot," Kyouya drawls, picking up a piece of nigiri sushi with his chopsticks.

"Ehh? Have Kao-chan and Hika-chan been setting an example for the President?" Mitsukuni questions innocuously. Everyone continues to address Suou Shizue as the President despite the fact that she is now the Advisor of the Suou Corporation… except, apparently, Kaoru.

"I haven't!" Hikaru refutes it. "Don't pin this on me; I don't speak to the President!"

"I haven't either!" Kaoru echoes. "Shizue-sama makes all these scathing comments of her own free will!"

"Liar! You corrupted Obaasama! She's much meaner to me now that she chats with you, Kaoru!"

"I assure you, Tamaki, in my conversations with the President she already held her current opinions of you."

"Waaaaahh!"

"Yeah, Tono, can't believe you're repaying kindness with injury – you know Kyouya-senpai and I have done nothing but try to elevate your standing with Shizue-sama. You're the one who goes around lowering it when you talk to her at home!"

Tamaki collapses. "Why does Obaasama insist on talking to you anyway? Why does Obaasama distrust what I tell her? Isn't it bad enough that you and Kaoru tell Otousan all sorts of funny things behind my back?"

Sympathetically, Hikaru lifts Tamaki up to a sitting position and braces him on one side. "I feel you, Tono."

"For the last time, Tamaki, she doesn't distrust you – she merely wants to listen to other perspectives as well. Your grandmother has spent the past decade grooming the best Suou heir to take over, you can hardly fault her for her keen interest in your progress. Especially now that you have convinced her of your worth, she actively wants to see you inherit and do well."

_So the President had approached Kyouya for updates, and is now in frequent contact with Kaoru?_

The sounds of eating and one person's weeping fill the room for a couple of minutes, until Kyouya breaks the silence by saying, "Although it's true the President likes Kaoru better."

"What!" Kaoru squawks, jerking rather violently. "No she doesn't! That's crazy, Kyouya-senpai! She specifically told me she enjoys talking to you too!"

"She does!" Tamaki barges in. "Last week during dinnertimes she kept telling us the stories you told her! You know, the one about the wine and the sewing machine!"

"Ah, heh." Kaoru scratches his neck, keeping his attention fixed on his plate. "But that doesn't mean anything."

"Her conversations with you are _very_ long," Kyouya says pointedly.

"She – she hasn't had much chance to rest or be frivolous for too many years, I guess," Kaoru stammers, clearly unhappy to have the focus on him. "We really aren't talking about anything serious or important; I just tell her about the drama and histrionics that have happened in any social events she may have missed, is all."

Hikaru snorts. "Isn't it about _that_?"

"What? What?" Tamaki clamours.

"Well, Kyouya-senpai's father did help your father take her down," Hikaru answers bluntly.

The atmosphere turns awkward, and Hikaru appears to realise belatedly that he shouldn't have said that.

"Uh, uhhh, oh god, I mean – "

"It's not," Kaoru cuts in firmly, with an assertiveness that he does not ordinarily adopt in front of his seniors. "It's not about that." He meets Kyouya's eyes squarely. "Shizue-sama doesn't hold a grudge. It's because I attend more parties, and I'm better at gossiping, and Shizue-sama hasn't had the freedom to do idle things like gossip for such a long time. It's why she loves it when she gets to watch drama serials with Tono, and why she likes sitting around listening to Tono play the piano." _Next time just ask me directly, Kyouya-senpai._

Kyouya breaks into an actual warm smile, and Kaoru ducks his head promptly.

"In any case, Kyouya, I don't think Obaasama will attribute Ootori-san's actions to you?" Tamaki offers. Hikaru nods.

"I'm sure," Kaoru agrees quietly. "Shizue-sama speaks of senpai and Ootori-sama as different people."

_Ootori-sama._ Thank god.

_Thank god._

If it had been 'Yoshio-sama', Takashi would have missed too many beats in the middle and utterly failed in his duty as a senior.

It is definitely not that Takashi thinks Kaoru is unlikeable, but he had not thought Kaoru would earn the friendship of their parents quite so quickly. Again this is characteristic of Hitachiins, and again it is significant on many levels.

All of the families invited to the Hitachiins' New Year's Gala are entitled to call the current host, Yuzuha-san, by name rather than surname, since these families will have to be sufficiently familiar with Yuzuha-san to score an invitation in the first place. The host does not elevate herself beyond her guests, hence Yuzuha-san is uniformly a '-san' to everyone in their circle. Retired hosts are addressed by name still, with '-sama' to recognise their past contributions, therefore even Suou Yuzuru addresses Hitachiin Kazuha as 'Kazuha-sama'. The exception is if a person belongs to the same generation as the Hitachiin, so Takashi's grandparents will continue to call her 'Kazuha-san' for life.

This means that everyone customarily calls the Hitachiins by name… and, more often than not, the Hitachiins call everyone else by name. Their society more commonly sticks to family names than personal names, and this is just another rule that is beneath the Hitachiins.

To illuminate this through an example, Ootori Yoshio and Suou Yuzuru are 'Ootori-san' and 'Suou-san' to each other respectively. But they are 'Yoshio-san' and 'Yuzuru-san' to Yuzuha-san, and Takashi's father is 'Akira-san' – when it comes to strictly traditional families like these, the impact of this privilege is deeply felt. Depending on the circumstances, Yuzuha-san may even be the only person on earth with permission to call someone by their personal name. People like Ootori Yoshio fall in this category – both his parents have passed on, his spouse has passed on, and he has no siblings. The name that belongs to him and him alone, and not to his family as a whole – that name will now only be heard from Yuzuha-san, and Takashi _understands_.

Takashi was not 'Mori-senpai' until he had these precious people in his life, and he knows how it feels to be called a different name, a _special _name. Takashi is 'Taka-nii' to only two people, Satoshi and Yasuchika, and by the calling of that name they bind him to them. Of their club Takashi is the only one who calls every single other club member by their full first names, and that means something.

It means that they recognise him and he recognises them, and they are connected.

Kaoru, then, has established his connections, and he is _recognised_. These parents are acknowledging Kaoru for the Hitachiin that he is, and these parents are not people who are easily impressed.

It does not surprise Takashi that Kaoru instinctively built his bridges this way while Kyouya still addresses many of their parents formally. That the parents have not allowed Kyouya to address them by name does not mean that they do not recognise him – indeed, Ootoris are regularly marked by the distance they maintain, so it's plain that Kyouya did not ask and Kaoru did. To cross the distance to reach an Ootori is to disrespect the boundaries set by that Ootori, and it is a venture that is fraught with much danger and unpredictability. All of this adds up to the truth that, strangely and interestingly, Kyouya has also received the _same_ recognition that Kaoru has achieved: Kyouya is the Ootori that he is.

"… should we stay out of Kyouya-senpai's way?"

"_Obviously._ You think I went to the trouble of ensuring that you guys have loads of free time together only to have you and Tono mess it all up for Kyouya-senpai?! No. Everybody backs off Kyouya-senpai while he does his thing; there's plenty more opportunity for us to play during the trip. If you and Tono can't behave, Hikaru, you're better off harassing Haruhi. At least there are no long-term repercussions there."

"Waaaaiii! I can't wait to see Haru-chan again!"

"You say it like you're an angel, Kaoru, but half the time you're the one who comes up with the plan that gets Hikaru and me in hot water!"

"I would never, Tono!" Kaoru denies in a voice close to sainthood. "I'm obedient and well-behaved, aren't I, Honey-senpai?"

"Mm!" Mitsukuni concurs brightly, knowing it would set Hikaru and Tamaki off. They pounce on Kaoru, and Kaoru laughs and laughs.

"Did I not protest on behalf of my eardrums earlier?" Kyouya asks nobody in particular, drowned out by the din.

When the juniors cool down at last, Hikaru recommends that they all plan for the trip collectively, in order to let everyone have a say. It's a good idea. "'Cos, who knows how busy Tono and Kyouya-senpai will be by then."

"I'll always make time for Haruhi!" Tamaki declares mushily.

"Yeah, yeah, what about Kyouya-senpai? Fuyumi-san has returned, hasn't she?" Hikaru says the last part a bit too lightly, in a way that maybe makes Takashi think he knows more than he's letting on. Mitsukuni catches it too.

Kaoru excuses himself to go to the restroom.

Without any visible reaction, Kyouya says, "Yes, oneesan is back. Whatever will happen will happen; there's no need to make this the topic for today. Are you doubting my ability to manage my calendar?"

"O-okay. Great! We can meet up at Mori-senpai's house after the exams!"

"Should _you_ be volunteering Mori-senpai's house, Hikaru?"

Hikaru winces, one hand flopping back and forth rapidly. "Mori-senpai is probably fine with it. Right, senpai?" He looks at Takashi expectantly.

"Aa," Takashi consents, nodding.

"And Mori-senpai's parents have been asking after you, Kyouya. They haven't seen you or Kaoru in quite a while," Tamaki adds helpfully.

"Ah, of course. I have been remiss." Kyouya bows his head a fraction in Takashi's direction. "Yes, let's do that."

Takashi knows that it is a matter of great importance to his father to know that he remains among good company, hence Takashi makes sure to bring his friends back home to meet his parents at least once each month – a task which isn't particularly difficult, considering they drop in randomly about once every week.

While Tsukishi-obasama had been most amused at the birth of their little club, the original response of Takashi's parents had been alarm. Takashi appreciates their concern, because his friends have reputations that precede them… reputations which do not necessarily cast them in a positive light. Despite being personally acquainted with Yuzuha-san and the rest of the parents, Takashi's parents did not know the children of their friends, same as Takashi did not know his friends' parents.

It had occurred to Takashi and his parents, just as it must have occurred to Kyouya, to Mitsukuni, to the twins, that a gathering of the most aristocratic names in their society could well have been the furthering of some sly scheme of a Suou; and at any rate this sort of conspicuous elitism is slightly distasteful at best or a form of utterly crass snobbery at worst.

Accompanied by the unfortunate facts that the then-Mitsukuni was trying desperately to be manly to please his own father against the better advice of Takashi's parents, and the then-Kyouya was a defeated child with no personality to speak of, and the then-Hikaru-and-Kaoru were callous, selfish, abusive little terrors, Takashi admits that his parents were quite right to be worried. Even though the club would allow Mitsukuni to be the person that he truly is, there is ever an ingrained hesitance for them to throw their support behind something that directly contradicts the expressed wishes of the head of the Haninozuka clan. Mitsukuni had explained things to his father, though that didn't magically change everything overnight.

But Shizuka thought Takashi should have the right to choose his own friends, and Akira agreed that they should not prejudge this group of children who they do not know to any meaningful degree. Takashi believed in Tamaki's words, and he wanted Mitsukuni to be free – thus he made his choice.

… Of course, his parents' initial meeting with his friends was a comedy of errors that can only be scripted by real life, and it felt like everything had conspired to construct the worst possible impression of the club members. It was early stages still, and Hikaru and Kaoru had been testing out an assortment of names with which to address Tamaki – Takashi had overheard one of them tell the other that he would never be able to bring himself to call an idiot their 'senpai', making an alternative absolutely essential. They'd zeroed in on Tamaki's kingly air and variously attempted 'Ō-sama' or 'Oujisama', 'Heika', 'Tenno' and 'No Kimi' – the more exalted the term, the more sarcastic and insulting it sounded – making it look like the Suou heir had a such a grandiose view of himself that he required his peers to treat him as royalty.

Further, Tamaki's Japanese was insufficiently advanced and he had a tendency to lapse back into French when he did not know the correct word or phrase to describe something – this by itself was fine, except that in these situations Tamaki directed his speech to the twins because Hikaru and Kaoru were fully fluent in French thanks to Yuzuha-san, and, proving themselves to be as unhelpful and mean-spirited as the rumours say, the both of them consistently pretended not to understand Tamaki, making the poor foreigner flap about in disruptive distress… thereby causing the sort of loud disturbance that is very much frowned upon in their culture, showing Tamaki to be well and truly the ill-mannered and poorly brought up child implied by his scandalous conception.

To add fuel to the fire, Mitsukuni had let himself go entirely to become an uncontrollable cake-eating machine, and Kyouya was neither accustomed to this level of insanity nor had he yet mastered how to govern this unruly bunch. Worst, Mitsukuni and Kyouya were feeling their way around the power dynamics of the club – Mitsukuni was senior, but Kyouya was one of the founders and higher ranked in the executive hierarchy. They were the counterpart of each other in their respective year levels – both at the very top, and both vastly overachieving individuals certain of their superiority. There's a reason that club committees are nearly always composed of third-year seniors, the oldest members, and as it stood Mitsukuni was interested in knowing how much Kyouya would defer to them, and Kyouya was interested in knowing how much they would interfere with his and Tamaki's management of the club…

Every time Mitsukuni said 'Kyou-chan', Kyouya would twitch involuntarily at the cutesy nickname that Takashi is sure nobody has ever dared to use on him; it didn't help that Kyouya-of-the-past often seemed like he had a "stick up his arse", as Hikaru put it, and Mitsukuni so enjoyed getting a rise out of people…

It had given Takashi a stomachache.

_Oh, Takashi,_ his mother had sighed.

Mitsukuni had pushed until one fine day Kyouya had retaliated with 'Honey-senpai' – their junior hadn't dropped the respectful honorific ("I remember my place and I regard yours with due esteem"), nor had he gone the full measure with something like 'Mitsu-senpai' or whatever ("I will seek your opinion on what you like"), he had cleverly selected something affectionate ("As friends we'll be formidable together") but he'd spoken up when he'd had enough ("This far and no further").

Suitably impressed, Mitsukuni instantaneously developed an incredible fondness for Kyouya and a soft spot for all of his less-than-ethical ways, occasionally even lending himself as an accomplice. The terms of address stuck, and Takashi became 'Mori-senpai' in the course of time – the rest of Mitsukuni's endearments for the juniors were easily accepted considering that Hikaru wasn't bothered anyhow, and Tamaki was thrilled at receiving special names that signalled his closeness to the rest of them. Kaoru was a tricky one; he seemed to be vaguely cognizant that power could be contained within a name even though Mitsukuni genuinely had no ulterior motive where the twins and Tamaki were concerned – later on as they grew more familiar with each other, Takashi would conclude that Kaoru's need for intimacy greatly and constantly overwhelms whatever reservations big or small he may have, and that Kaoru has a deep-seated wish to be loved that definitely rivals Tamaki's, that made them very similar people at heart. Perhaps the singular difference is that Tamaki's craving manifests itself very openly, while Kaoru is always running away from his need and occupying himself with other things to distract himself from its squalling.

After his friends had filed into their cars and left, his father had had no comment. Takashi had hung his head in misery.

"_Oh_, Akira," his mother had coaxed. "It isn't that bad. Children need time and experience to grow."

"That boy," his father had replied with a tinge of astonished disbelief. "He is like a perfectly programmed robot. Where is his personality? His individuality? The Suou boy is noisy, but he has spirit and charisma. Is this how Ootori-san has been raising his children since his wife's death?"

"Akira, it is not for us to critique other people's parenting."

"Tell me what you think of them, son."

"I think that they need friends, Otousama. Okaasama says that the only way people improve is by learning, and the only way to learn is by exposing ourselves to new things. Having real, dependable, accepting friends is new to these juniors."

Akira had studied him intently. "And you wish to be that friend?"

"Yes. I think they will teach me, too."

"Hmm." A grave pause. "Now listen to what your mother thinks of them."

"Me? It is too early to pass sentence."

"All right. As and when your mother has something to say about them, you will listen, Takashi."

"Yes."

"Oh, _Takashi_," his mother had laughed dotingly.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"Cake! Caaaaake!"

"Cake! Cake! Cake!" chant the twins, joining Mitsukuni in his euphoria.

Takashi manoeuvres the cake out of the box, and Kaoru turns down the offers of assistance from the waitstaff to set up the candles for lighting. The confection has layers of vanilla and lime mousse between pistachio sponge, with strawberry jelly and lime glaze. There is tartness to balance out the sweetness, and Kyouya isn't much of a chocolate fan, which makes this an outstanding selection.

_Mitsukuni-kun is eating rather a lot of cake these days, isn't he? Watch that he maintains proper dental health, Takashi, my child. His weight may not suffer but his teeth certainly will._

"Soooo preeeettyyyy!" Mitsukuni glows like a firework, barely holding back from drooling.

_But Mitsukuni-kun does seem more self-possessed in a way, doesn't he? I can feel his tranquillity. He's found balance._

Hikaru raises the camera. "Smile, everyone! One, two – _cheese_!"

_My, Hikaru-kun is extremely lively. Do you sense that his underlying energy is very different from Kaoru-kun's? I'm astounded that they are apparently frequently mistaken for the other. I hope you do not make such an error, Takashi. Humans may be alike, but they are never the same. You know, I feel that Hikaru-kun more closely resembles Yuzuha, while Kaoru-kun takes after Kazuha-sama more._

"Wait! No! I wasn't ready!" Tamaki objects. "It's 'one, two, _three_, then cheese, Hikaru!"

"Fine, fine!" Hikaru grumbles. "Again. One, two, three – fromage, Tono!" He checks the photograph and readjusts the lens. "Ugh, the angle. Kaoru, could you," – his brother is on the same page as he is, already in the process of shepherding the rest into position – "brilliant, thanks."

_So much raw talent, these Hitachiins. I heard that Kazuha-sama used to write essays and poetry that could make her schoolteachers cry. They're always immaculately dressed, too – clothes, accessories, grooming, everything. It must be unimaginably time-consuming. Hikaru-kun and Kaoru-kun sometimes wear makeup, don't they? Of course Tsukishi-san thinks they simply wake up chic._

"Here." Kaoru sticks out his hand, palm up. Adorning his wrist is an intricate Van Cleef & Arpels platinum-and-diamond bracelet that was given to him by Hikaru for Christmas last year; the white and silver shades accentuate his sky blue turquoise outfit beautifully. Somehow, Takashi doesn't know how, when Kaoru is beside Kyouya, who's wearing purple, it's like a switch flicks on to spotlight on the birthday boy. The colours absolutely pop. "Swap."

Hikaru stands up and, without thought, scoots to Tamaki. Takashi really has to monitor this situation – it's unlikely that Tamaki has any room in his mind for anyone except Haruhi, and Tamaki is the kind of person who will never betray his girlfriend. Just because Tamaki is closed to romantic options, though, doesn't mean that Hikaru is – and Hikaru is the kind to fall in love without being aware of it. If it gets to the stage where he figures it out, it's far too late. Hikaru's black leather jacket and cotton candy pink striped trousers is quirky and fresh, complementing Tamaki's classic deep red and champagne silks; he looks stunning beside Kaoru as well, and Takashi, who's in pale jade and dark brown.

_People who are in love dress very carefully, but it's really impossible to tell with a Hitachiin. Not only do they perpetually look good, they also know how to make those around them look good, especially if they like you. Probably the greatest challenge is that Hitachiins as a whole have unorthodox sexuality. Yuzuha once openly expressed to me that they love who they love, and everything else doesn't matter. 'Why should it?', she demanded, more like a child than an adult. Haha! What a liberal family; no wonder our history is littered with endless stories of their love affairs. Ah, why am I telling you this, silly me. You already know it from your club._

"Let's send the pictures to Haruhi when we get home!"

_Oh, _Takashi_. Is that the reason Hikaru-kun was here last week? Dear me, Haruhi-kun is not very mindful of these boys, is she? But, you, child, in attending to Hikaru-kun you should also be careful that he doesn't fall for you if you are unable to reciprocate. In the name of loyalty, in the name of war, for centuries we Morinozukas and Haninozukas have traded body, heart and soul. Hitachiins make that same sacrifice in the name of love, for they are fundamentally emotional beings. Once you understand this, you should also understand that the cruellest thing to do to a Hitachiin is to trample on their feelings, or use their feelings against them._

… _and I know that should Hikaru-kun or Kaoru-kun love any of you, whether male or commoner, Yuzuha would let you have them. She knows she needs an heir, but yes…_

_She would let you have them._

Months later at Yuzuha-san's mansion, Hikaru had decided to hold back on a nasty comment meant for a fashion editor of a certain magazine when Takashi raised his eyebrows slightly in gentle reminder, and afterwards Takashi had heard Yuzuha-san muttering about having a son to spare, and _of course _it takes someone with Takashi's self-command to conquer her strong-willed child, and by the time she got to the musings on how to convince Miko-san, Takashi had done what any guy would have done in that situation: flee. With difficulty, because Yuzuha-san always knows when and where Takashi is in a room. She is highly attuned to ninja-like presences due to her husband.

"Ahhhh! Then show me, show me! Do I look handsome in the photos?!" Tamaki grabs the camera anxiously. "AHHHHHHH! Look at my face in this one! Hikaru! What is this?!"

"Huh, that's the photo that I definitely absolutely totally sure as hell am gonna send to Haruhi," Hikaru leers. "'Cos it's Kyouya-senpai's birthday, and _Kyouya-senpai_ looks the handsomest in this photo!"

"WAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH! But my mouth is open, and I'm shouting at you, and I'm halfway standing up and halfway sitting down and what if Haruhi wants to display this photo?! What if she only has a weird photograph of her boyfriend?! What if her friends think that Kyouya's her boyfriend?!"

"That's not likely," Kyouya says dryly. "And at any rate I'm sure Haruhi will set the record straight with these friends."

"And then her friends will wonder why she didn't pick Kyouya-senpai," Hikaru explodes with mocking laughter.

Kaoru rescues the camera from the ensuing melee just in time, but he blinks vacantly before slipping into a similar cackle. Something about it sounds a little off, almost forced, and typically he would be right there with Hikaru carrying out the joke and tussling with Tamaki. Mitsukuni turns to him with enormous inquiring eyes, and Kaoru says, "We're going to have a problem on our hands when we go there for our second-year school trip. Over there they know Haruhi's a girl, over here they think she's a boy. I don't know if Yuzuru-sama thought about that, or if he expects me to deal with it."

"Don't worry about it, Kao-chan," Mitsukuni advises sagely. "There's cake."

Now Kaoru chuckles again with the ring of authenticity, and everybody assembles for a group shot. In his eagerness to extend his arms to the furthest they can go in order to embrace everyone, Tamaki overbalances and topples over into Kyouya's lap, taking Mitsukuni with him.

_Tamaki-kun has a very pure soul. He gives so much of himself that it's otherworldly. There is much wisdom in the way he has chosen to lead his life. _

"Just stay there," Kyouya sighs in exasperation, clasping Tamaki's chin and forcing him to face front. Mitsukuni plasters up against them, and…

"…Kao-chan/Kaoru?"

Opposite them, Kaoru shakes himself out of watching their antics in a stupor. "H-Huh? Um, yeah, right." He presses the button and dashes into place.

_Most people are their own worst enemy, constantly bringing themselves down with negativity and reminding themselves to be cynical – but Tamaki-kun is his own best ally, and everybody else's too. He's trusting, forgiving, breathtakingly sincere. The whole of him is a revolution._

_I'm glad you are friends with him, Takashi._

One of the waitresses appears to be nudging her friend into helping them to take more group photographs. Her friend is attempting to shrink away bashfully, embarrassed by the inappropriate urging to make herself more noticeable to Tamaki. Hikaru knows Kyouya doesn't like having an audience at personal functions, therefore he throws an irritated glance their way as he goes to fiddle with the camera again in his photographer's quest for artistic excellence. The waitstaff understand the dismissal and remove themselves respectfully.

"The candles are melting, Hikaru. A couple more shots will do," Kyouya tells him. "Kaoru, I haven't had a photograph with you yet."

Kaoru acquiesces, all docile smiles and lowered lids.

"Hurry hurry, Hika-chan!"

"I get it, I get it! Cooperate for a bit longer, senpais!"

"Caaaaaaaaake!"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Takashi is the lone ranger left in the restaurant to settle the bill. He'd asked for it at the table but brought it out of Kyouya's sight to pay for it, and in the meantime his cousin and juniors have tumbled out of the place like a band of happy drunks.

Hikaru had detoured around to inform him that they are going to troop to the nearby city park for a nice after-dinner stroll before going home, and Takashi had nodded for them to go on ahead first.

"Your card, Okyaku-sama." The item is held out to him with both hands. Takashi slides it back into his wallet and pockets it, prepared to leave.

Again there is nudging amongst the three waitresses frozen in their polite bows, and this time, she musters her courage. Takashi can't say that it's completely unexpected, especially as she has withheld from any sign of bad form all evening despite her friends' encouragement.

"U-Um…! Umm, Okyaku-sama," she manages meekly, and stops, fumbling for words. She may be calling him 'Customer-sama', but surely she knows his family name from the reservation he made. It must be hard, knowing that she would barely stand a chance with any of Takashi's friends yet being able to stand there and try nonetheless. Tamaki would have admired it.

It's just her luck that she had to pick the one of them who isn't single. Takashi feels sorry for her. "He has a girlfriend," he says as considerately and humanely as he can. "He loves her very much."

Her face falls and crumples into a smile, and suddenly –

Takashi is able to place Kaoru's expression, and he knows what it means, and he has made a _colossal mistake_. In the end Kurt Vonnegut turns out to be right; maybe we're doomed to repeat the past no matter what because that's what it is to be alive.

It's not relief.

It's resignation. Wistfulness. _Hopelessness._

He's seen it on the girls in school before, the fatalism of the words "Not again" resounding in their heads after a failed confession, or the mute anguish of _that_ emotion, intense and excruciating and _unrequited_…

In fact he has seen it on Kaoru before, and it's inexcusable that they all let it happen again. How is it that they knew to be vigilant for Hikaru but not Kaoru?

_Oh, Takashi._

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) I have received some beautiful, amazing, wondrous fanart! Here is the link to the OT7 art, or please click on the link provided in my profile! yuufee . deviantart art/Ouran-Highschool-Host-Club-OT7-321980464

(b) Here are some more new, lovely names:

**Morinozuka Shizuka **(銛之塚 · 静) – her first name means quiet/calm. Takashi's mother is named 'quiet and calm', so you see how she produced him. Just don't ask what happened with Satoshi, heh. 'Shizuka' is a unisex name, like 'Kaoru', though both are more commonly used for females. It was a conscious decision to select a unisex name for Takashi's mother – in this chapter we discuss how Kaoru is a blend of male and female, with an androgynous or feminine-leaning underlying energy whereas Hikaru's energy is rather more identifiably masculine. Shizuka is also meant to have that element of androgyny about her; she is tall, mighty and physically strong, with a masculine-leaning underlying energy. Takashi mentions that she is the femininity present in their family, which is true… but in any other family Shizuka would really be a portrayal of masculinity.

Her counterpart, I guess, would be Tsukishi, who is unabashedly extremely feminine and one of those short and slender Asian women who can be seen tottering about in delicate heels and wearing soft fabrics like silk and chiffon with ruffles and ribbons and fine jewellery and skilfully applied makeup. That's because Tsukishi and Mitsukuni are good at subverting expectations – it's not that they are putting on a false persona to trap you. It is that they really _are_ cutesy little things who adore other cutesy little things. They aren't secretly manly and gruff or whatever and pretending to be harmless. No. They are great warriors who _happen_ to like sweet and cute. And who said sweet and cute can't beat you up?

This runs in with the theme of Haninozukas that I've been trying to establish: they challenge stereotypes and make you rethink what you thought of them. You think Yasuchika is serious and gloomy? Put a baby chick in front of him and watch him go nuts. You think Yorihisa must be a stern, robust and strong man? Well, he isn't above trolling Akira (Chapter 72, page 1 & 2) and he isn't above trash-talking Akira or Takashi (page 24), and he's a bit of a foolish doting father too (page 24 when he's moved that Mitsukuni has grown, _hilarious_).

The Morinozuka theme is: What you see is what you get. The main inspiration for Shizuka is actually Galadriel from the Lord of the Rings, except Asian and obviously with Japanese colouring – ink-black hair and eyes. In Tolkien's legendarium Galadriel is described as an eager participant and leader in battle but also a match for the loremasters and their knowledge/wisdom, and, I quote, "blessed with the ability to peer into the minds of others and she judged them so fairly". One of her names in Quenya was 'Nerwen', 'ner'=man and 'wen'=maiden, hence 'manly maiden' to refer to her height and strength. I thought it would be amusing to have every single Morinozuka tower over the Haninozukas, and possibly even lord their height over their traditional masters sometimes… just because if you look at Chapter 72, page 24, Akira directly shoots down Yorihisa's remark that Mitsukuni has grown, and Yorihisa reacts immediately and defensively with, "I was talking to myself. Stupid."

Oh god, I love these two families so much. I imagine that Akira is 185 cm or 6 feet 1 inch, and Shizuka is 183 cm or 6 feet. Takashi is 192 cm. Lastly, of the mothers, Yuzuha and Tsukishi are high-maintenance women while Shizuka, Anne-Sophie and Kotoko are not. As for Okiko, well…

**Haninozuka Mitsue** (埴之塚 · 光枝), née Saionji – Mitsukuni and Yasuchika's paternal grandmother, and the goddess who made Usa-chan. Mitsue is the person for whom Mitsukuni was named. Her surname, Saionji (西園寺), points to her nobility, and her given name is 光枝, which means 'branch of light'. This is the kanji of Mitsukuni's name: 光邦. Notice the first kanji character, the 'mitsu' part of their names is the same.

By the way, since we are speaking of underlying energies – it's not that I don't recognise Tamaki is beautiful. Tamaki is the poster boy for beauty; he is The Bishonen.

The thing is, he doesn't quite have the androgyny that Haruhi and Kaoru have got going on. To me, at least. I just think that Tamaki's underlying energy is masculine. If you see him in the sports arc, or the way his male schoolmates treat him in either that sports festival arc or the hot springs chapter, they address him like, "Suou!" in a very bro-style, man-to-man kind of familiarity and boisterousness. Also, Tamaki is the epitome of a ladies' man, and look at his sexual assertiveness in the January 2011 special chapter of the manga, page 16. I'm not saying that only men can be sexually assertive – I'm saying that male sexual assertiveness usually differs from female sexual assertiveness, and Tamaki does regard himself being as very manly, _whereas Kaoru does not_.

What is the basis for this claim? First, before anything else, it is necessary to state that Kaoru does know he is male. The difference here is he does not think of himself as a very 'manly' creature.

Now, there is no way to make that claim with the force of law, obviously. I can only submit some considerations: 1) Kaoru only ever calls himself 'boku' (僕), whereas all the other male club members use 'ore' (俺). Except for Mitsukuni who also uses 'boku', but then Mitsukuni's underlying energy is alien, so can we leave him out of the debate? Some fans have pointed out that one way of differentiating between the twins is that one twin occasionally uses 'ore', and that would be Hikaru. In the early part of Ouran both anime and manga, Tamaki strongly objected to Haruhi referring to herself as 'ore' because 'ore' is a very masculine pronoun. Note that Haruhi was quite excited about the thought of using 'ore'. 'Boku' is politer, less aggressive, and more often used by younger males.

2) Kaoru automatically and habitually positions his body such that it takes on a conventionally female pose or image. Don't think that this is insignificant, because Kaoru is the son of a fashion designer and a part time model. If anyone understands poses and images, it's this family. To understand what I'm talking about, look at the way he stands and sits and behaves during his club routines – his body language is dependent, pliant and delicate, fitting the ideal of the 'perfect Japanese woman'. And don't think that this is only an act – Kaoru takes on the uke role _because he is more suited to it_, he did not 'become more uke' because he took on that role. For examples of his real life body language, see: Chapter 53 page 8 middle panel, and January 2011 special chapter page 8. Note also his final styling in the Volume 18 Omake and in the July 2011 special chapter, pages 13-14 – he grew his hair out. Now, again, I'm not saying that guys can't have long hair. However, it is true that longer hair in modern society is associated with femininity, and anyway the relevant comparison for Kaoru is that particular niche of models, the androgynous models. In high fashion there are these gorgeous female-looking male models, and they grow out their hair to smudge their gender in the photoshoots – conversely, when they retire, they often cut it back.

In contrast, Tamaki's body language swings between manly or childish. He doesn't have any of that… how do I even describe it… fluttering? Swishyness? He stands his ground with legs apart and back straight, and when he walks he does so with one hand casually tucked in a pocket like some dashing prince, or like a hot Hollywood leading actor in an expensive suit.

In a nutshell, I sense from Tamaki that his underlying energy is masculine. Just because he bears resemblance to Fai D. Fluorite from Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle doesn't mean automatic relegation to the category of 'men who are probably on the bottom during sex'. Fai's underlying energy is female, and anyway it is a terrible heterosexual stereotype that the more feminine man should be on the bottom. A good portion of the toppest gay men around are flamingly feminine and fine with it. But I know that in the Japanese culture and therefore in animanga there are still all these 'indicators' and a fixed seme-uke paradigm, as if the men can't switch it up in bed – so let's talk about the indicators. Ordinarily, they are: age, height, colouring, hobbies/behaviour. We've already established that Tamaki doesn't lean towards "typical" feminine behaviour (e.g. cooking like Fai, sewing like Kaoru), and he is the second tallest in club and third oldest in age. For some reason the characters with fairer colouring tend to be regarded as being on the bottom, so maybe that's the only thing we can 'fault' him with.

(c) The host club, their schoolmates, and other clubs like the sports club and Kasanoda's gardening club found mysterious hot springs in the school grounds in manga Chapter 59. The chapter is occupied with a treasure map and the hunt for treasure, and the relevant hot springs page is 31.

(d) After Suou Yuzuru's coup, and after the Suous all received a much-needed tongue lashing from Haruhi, the family reconciled and Suou Shizue was instated as the Advisor of the Suou Corporation board: Chapter 82, page 22 of the manga.

(e) By the way, Takashi does not get reimbursed by club funds for these dinners. That'll feel like a boss treating his subordinates on some company dinner, and he's a senior who is treating his juniors, his close friends. What a senpai, right?

If it interests you, their birthday dinners (on the occasions where a party is _not_ held, like this particular occasion) cost around several hundred per person, approximately $450-$600. Yes, that's in dollars (USD or AUD) and not yen for your easy reference. Let's say this dinner cost $500pp, and $500 x 6 = $3000, and Takashi treats 6 people per calendar year, amounting to 5 times because the twins share a birthday – $3000 x 5 = ?

So Takashi doesn't just pay for everyone, but he mentions in this chapter that very early on he actually put his hand up for this job. I mean, _what a senpai!_ Well, Kyouya did tell you that he loves them.

(f) However, Kyouya does use club funds to pay for Takashi's birthday. Kyouya can be a bit miserly with money, it's true, but in this instance it doesn't have anything to do with stinginess.

School clubs or university clubs ordinarily obtain their money from these sources: contribution from members, budget from the school, sponsors who have a stake in the students of the club. Right? And sometimes fundraising events, though those are mostly for charitable purposes.

The reason why I say that Kyouya is the sort of guy who will stick to these sources is because it is stupid to use your own money, and so much of it, on a school activity. Have you ever known a treasurer of, say, the drama club in your school to fork out all the expenses out of pocket for the club? So, what, whenever this drama club runs low on money and can't afford new costumes and props, or whenever the club needs to travel to someplace to stage a performance, this treasurer just fills in the gap with his/her_ own_ money?!

Of course not, and that's why Kyouya sticks to official channels to derive his funds, which is why he is always aggrieved when Tamaki overspends – each of them have immense _private_ wealth, but the club coffers are not quite as plentiful as their bank accounts. So it's not that Kyouya or any of them can't afford it – it's that _the club_ can't afford it, which means Kyouya the vice-president needs to scramble to raise finance. It is not as simple as Kyouya using his own money to top up for the shortfall. Why, you ask.

It is important to think of the club as separate from its members. Remember when I talked about companies having separate legal personality? The club has its own cash inflow and outflow, the club has its own accounts and its own spending power. This is a primary tenet of business, for even if you own a business, even if you are a director with power to sign off on behalf of the business, you should not be confusing the business with yourself. If you decide to help the business bear a debt, or if you decide to use your money to purchase something for the business, that is you making an investment in the business. Do you see? There is a critical difference between using something of yours for the business, and using something of the business for the business.

This is how I deeply know Kyouya will be (or already is) a superlative businessman. He is absolutely splendid at donning different hats as the situation requires – his ability to make the distinction is peerless, and he juggles his multiple roles competently. I will illustrate. Let's say, hypothetically, that the club contribution is ¥1000 per month (that's just $10 Australian dollars, haha). Kyouya is the sort of guy who will:

1. Take ¥1000 out of his own wallet  
>2. Record an outgoing of that sum in his personal accounts<br>3. Put that ¥1000 in whatever he stores the club funds in  
>4. Record a cash inflow of ¥1000 in the club accounts.<p>

Which means:

Scenario 1. Kyouya is meeting Tamaki for coffee. Tamaki wants a commoner sweet. The money comes out of his personal accounts because right now he is Tamaki's friend.  
>Scenario 2. Tamaki wants to introduce the commoner sweet to their customers during club this week. The money comes out of the club accounts because right now he is Tamaki's vice-president.<p>

He may be the one holding the purse strings to both accounts, but just because he controls both doesn't mean that he should haphazardly mix them around when spending.

Anyway, Kyouya mentions in Chapter 2 of 1-7th that the host club receives a Tier 1 budget, which is the highest budget the academy provides and it usually goes to the biggest clubs. I imagine also that Kyouya would have judiciously sourced for some good sponsors in the past when necessary – he is careful not to make their hosting an advertising exercise, so clearly anything involving big and blatant logos is out. Too vulgar for their atmosphere.

This is neither canon, nor have I managed to squeeze it into the fic (yet), but the way the host club first started up was all six of them contributed a large, equal sum towards the opening float and initial club overheads, plus they had the club-starting allowance from the academy. Originally they were going to fix a monthly contribution depending on the figures from the first few months, but then their vice-president consistently miraculously generates enough revenue to cover their costs and even turn a profit, however minimal.

Which brings us back to the main point about Kyouya using the funds/profits to pay for Takashi's birthday. It is because the small leftover profits are skimmed off little by little at the end of each month to coagulate into a reasonable sum of money – this sum constitutes everybody's "wages" (minus Takashi's share, which is deducted by Kyouya and allocated to other club things). Except, instead of distributing the wages or carrying it forward to the future, Kyouya uses the results of their hard work to celebrate Takashi's special day, so everyone is in effect treating Takashi. Clever vice president.

(g) I keep forgetting to mention this – the exact birthdates for these characters are posted on my profile page, with explanations. To save you the effort, I will cut and paste it:

**Ouran Birthdates**

In the Ouran canon, the specific year of birth of all the characters are never stated, only their birth days and months. In this vacuum, I have worked out the most plausible and fitting timeline based on the Japanese education system.

In Japan, children start elementary school the April after their sixth birthday. The first day of the new school year is always in April. This means that within a year level, there will be students of two ages co-existing, and it is possible to be a 'senpai' to someone else despite being born in the same year.

These are the most sensible and canon-accurate years of birth for the Ouran characters, in descending order of age:

# Mori: 5 May 1991

# Honey: 29 February 1992*

# Tamaki: 8 April 1992

# Kyouya: 22 November 1992

# Hikaru: 9 June 1993

# Kaoru: 9 June 1993

# Haruhi: 4 February 1994

_* 1992 is a leap year._

All of them are very clear in which cohort they will belong in, save Tamaki because Tamaki's birthday falls in April. Depending on the date of the first day of school - if the first day of the new academic year is before April 8, then Tamaki will fall into Kyouya's cohort. If the first day of that particular academic year is after April 8, then Tamaki will have enrolled into Mori and Honey's cohort as he would have attained six years of age. Only the first option follows canon, which makes Tamaki one of the oldest students in his year level.

(h) Given that all of you are animanga fans, I'm fairly certain we all know what a miko is.

From Wikipedia: "Manga and anime typically portray a miko as a heroine who fights evil spirits or demons. Miko are frequently ascribed with magical or supernatural powers, especially divination, and are skilled in the Japanese martial arts."

So you see why Tsukishi and Yuzuha find it really funny to call Shizuka a miko. That's obviously not Shizuka's actual profession, though.

(i) Takashi's best at history, so why not let's go the whole hog and have a history lesson in his special chapter! *lethargic school student groan* Come on, summon some excitement! From Classical Japan onwards, the bare bones of the Japanese historical timeline goes like this:

**Classical Japan**: Asuka ― Nara ― Heian

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**Feudal Japan**: Kamakura ― Kenmu Restoration ― Muromachi ― Azuchi-Momoyama

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**Early modern Japan**: Edo/Tokugawa

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**Empire of Japan/Modern Japan**: Prewar (Meiji Restoration)

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**Contemporary Japan**: Postwar

This is useful in understanding how I have characterised their families and where they get their prestige. Let's begin with the **Hitachiins**.

We aren't told much about the Hitachiin family history, unlike the Suou and Ootori families where we are at least told that they are descended from dukes, etc. There are times where we see the Hitachiin dynasty but they are dressing Haruhi up like one of those anime fillers dedicated to put the kawaii lead female into clothes they wouldn't usually wear, including but not limited to maid clothes, sexy animal-inspired clothes and generally revealing stuff.

So. The following is a fan-created take on it. The Heian period is very Hitachiin – it is considered the peak of the Japanese imperial court and noted for its art, especially poetry and literature. It is also the period in which Murasaki Shikibu wrote The Tale of Genji; the lead character's name is Hikaru. In the Uji Chapters, the story follows a character named Kaoru. Hatori Bisco has stated that she did not name the twins after The Tale of Genji.

This is the life that the Hitachiin ancestors had: "Heian culture and court life reached a peak early in the 11th century. Courtiers became overly refined with little to do, insulated from reality, preoccupied with the minutiae of court life, turning to artistic endeavors. Emotions were commonly expressed through the artistic use of textiles, fragrances, calligraphy, colored paper, poetry, and layering of clothing in pleasing color combinations – according to mood and season. Those who showed an inability to follow conventional aesthetics quickly lost popularity, particularly at court. Popular pastimes for Heian noblewomen – who adhered to rigid fashions of floor-length hair, whitened skin and blackened teeth – included having love affairs, writing poetry and keeping diaries. The literature that Heian court women wrote is recognized as some of the earliest and among the best literature written in the Japanese canon."

From that description, in a way it is like the Hitachiins have never left that period, as their refinement and creativity (and love affairs, hah) continue to present day. Further, "Heian Imperial court life was immensely fashionable, but also dissolute. Court women lived in seclusion, were known by nicknames and, through strategic marriages, were used to gain political power. Despite their seclusion, some women wielded considerable influence, often achieved through competitive salons, dependent on the quality of the attendants." The concept of salons is very much something that falls within a Hitachiin's domain, doesn't it? It just sounds like something a Hitachiin woman would automatically enjoy – discussing their works, absorbing other people's works, etc.

I imagine that the early Hitachiins (they would not yet have adopted this family name, but I will use it for the sake of convenience and clarity) hovered around the status of court ladies and minor nobility. They were talented, and chose to devote themselves to improving their art. Rank meant nearly everything then, and they were never part of the high ranks. The women who would have belonged to these lofty places are the ancestors of Kyouya's mother, Ichijo Okiko, and Mitsukuni's grandmother, Saionji Mitsue. Those two surnames are descended from the powerful Fujiwara clan, who controlled the court at that time.

The rise of the samurai class occurred near the later part of Heian, and they would eventually take power and start the feudal period of Japan.

The Hitachiins have always been predominantly civilians, so they would have struggled through the wars and savagery of feudalism. As the shoguns took power, the richer and more well-established Hitachiins would have remained in the powerless imperial court, keeping their heads down to remain safe. Some Hitachiins definitely seduced the warlords and came under their aegis, and in the Kamakura period the male-male wakashudō love affairs would have saved some of them as well. Others definitely became Shirabyōshi, skilled dancer/performers, to entertain nobles and high-ranking samurai, or perhaps a handful of poor ones would begin to use their skill at sewing and such to make a living, and these lesser Hitachiins would have faded into the masses and their lines would vanish from the influence held by the central branches of their dynasty.

By the Edo period, which is a period of peace that came about after the Tokugawa shogunate seized control, they would have regained their footing. They never quite left the top of the social pyramid, and at some point a woman would have been granted their matrilineal surname by the Emperor. In that era, commoners could not have surnames, and names were only given in recognition of a great achievement and contribution. This means that the granted name, Hitachiin, is too honourable to be extinguished by marriage, and from then onwards their husbands and children took this name. Because their daughters are the primary heirs, the family would have become accustomed to marrying their sons into other powerful families.

In practical terms, what this means for Hikaru and Kaoru is that with their sister's birth, their lines will cease to be the main branch of the family. The majority of the heirlooms and ancestral property and prestige will pass to Ageha. It almost makes you wonder why Kaoru wishes for a sister, but the twins have never been small-minded that way. Also, it means that Hikaru and Kaoru were raised in an environment where they've never felt entitled to keep their surnames, whereas clearly their clubmates don't even question the "right" that their children will take their surname. It works this way: if they marry a lower-ranked person, the person obviously takes their family name. But, if they marry a higher-ranked person, they marry into that family as well, e.g. if Tamaki were female and Hikaru fell in love with "her", Hikaru joins the Suou family and takes that name. This is part of why the twins are highly popular with the handful of customers who hail from great families, as the girls don't really want to have to leave their legacy behind. Not many families are definitively greater than the Hitachiins, though, and if there is a dispute about which is the more precious family name, bet upon it that Yuzuha will win that argument.

**Haninozuka**

Quite self-evidently, the Haninozuka clan peaked in the feudal warring era. We are also not told much about them, but the nature of this family and the Morinozuka family makes it easy to know where to trace their ancestry. Bear in mind that just because they flourished in the feudal era doesn't mean they didn't exist before that.

Somewhere in their timeline, the Haninozuka Daimyo, or leading figure of the clan, would have been awarded the title of Sei-i Taishōgun by the Emperor. Shōgun literally means 'military commander' or in modern usage it encompasses 'general' as well. Sei-i Taishōgun definitely means top-ranking general, or Generalissimo to be exact (historically the rank of Generalissimo was given to a military officer leading an entire army or the entire armed forces of a nation, usually only subordinate to the sovereign). At various times in the history of Japan, the Sei-i Taishōgun was really the governing individual of the empire. Daimyo often hired samurai to guard their land and they paid the samurai in land or food. Relatively few daimyo could afford to pay samurai in money. With the dominance of the warrior class, the male-line Haninozuka clan would have sought out opportunities to intermingle more with aristocratic women, and this would help give rise to the modern-day prestige of the name. Also, during the Meiji Restoration in the period of the Empire of Japan, those old aristocratic families from the Heian period (kuge) would combine with the daimyo to form the Kazoku (華族), which is a new aristocracy, a hereditary peerage that existed between 1869 and 1947.

1. Prince or Duke (公爵 kōshaku)  
>2. Marquess (侯爵 kōshaku)<br>3. Earl or Count (伯爵 hakushaku)  
>4. Viscount (子爵 shishaku)<br>5. Baron (男爵 danshaku)

The Haninozuka family definitely received a peerage – the head of the family became a Marquess (侯爵 _kōshaku_), the second highest rank.

A graph of their fortunes would include plenty of crests and troughs. Mitsukuni and Yasuchika are blue-blooded through both their paternal and maternal lines, and their parents and grandparents themselves are blue-blooded on both sides as well.

**Morinozuka**

Closely linked to the Haninozuka clan, the Morinozuka family history runs in parallel to theirs in terms of fortunes – since they owe their rise to prominence to the Haninozukas, they naturally fall with it. They began as samurai that were employed by the Haninozuka Daimyo, and ever have they followed in the way of the bushi. The path of the warrior was one of honor, emphasizing duty to one's master, and loyalty unto death. They've always been a family with notable onna-bugeisha, female warriors, due to the stature and skill of their women.

Over time, powerful samurai clans like the Morinozuka family became warrior nobility, or _buke_ (武家 – a martial house or member of such house), who were only nominally under the court aristocracy. As _de facto_ aristocrats for centuries, samurai developed their own cultures that influenced Japanese culture as a whole. The culture associated with the samurai such as the tea ceremony, monochrome ink painting, rock gardens and poetry were adopted by warrior patrons throughout the centuries 1200–1600.

At the formation of Kazoku, the Morinozuka clan was classified as Shizoku (士族 _Shizoku_, lit. "warrior families"), a different class entirely.

**Suou**

These are the descriptions in the manga: (of Suou Yuzuru) "His lineage is of royal blood. In an age past, he would have ruled from behind a folding screen" – Chapter 25, page 10. Another description of the family in Chapter 63, page 6: "The Suou family have royal lineage and Genji Clan blood flowing through their veins – they are a distinguished family in Japan. Awoken from the Meiō era [this is during the Muromachi period], they handle finance, business as well as education-related industries and service-related industries. The name 'Suou' is well-known throughout the world. Since her husband's death, the current chairwoman has shown her excellent skills in planning and management. Even at 70 years of age, she remains on top."

This family would have been among the crème de la crème of Heian court, and they would probably have descended from one of the minor princes – imperial blood. Their past would be rather similar to the Hitachiins in that they would have tried their hardest to remain in the relative safety of court, biding their time until the warriors exhausted themselves or until a clear winner emerged in order for them to throw their support behind said winner and reform a new court.

After all, they have always been part of the aristocracy, and despite being weakened by a lack of military might they still retain their prestige. Also, they would have engaged with the Haninozuka-level shoguns and daimyo in order to guarantee their future.

The graph of their fortunes is long and lasting like the Hitachiins, really. No violent ups and downs until they came to the Prewar period of the Meiji Restoration. They are an old kuge family, so at Kazoku the head of the family obviously became a prince/duke (公爵 _kōshaku_) and they held that title until the system was abolished. Meanwhile, they finally found the opportunity they needed to make a comeback by throwing themselves headfirst into the industrial revolution that began around 1870.

Then, because of the World Wars, again they made themselves lie low as it wasn't their scene… finally, during the Postwar period, they _pounced_. Centuries of aptitude at politicking, leading, manipulating all came to the fore as they jumped straight onto the capitalist train and scattered themselves all across the economy to boost it and milk it for all it's worth.

They played an integral role in rebuilding Japan and liaising with the Americans. It's inconceivable that they'd managed to climb higher than they ever were, and right now they are at the very top of their society.

I would just like to say: given Shizue's age, it's likely that she was born around the end of World War II in 1945, at the collapse of the Empire of Japan. She had to live through one of the hardest and most challenging historical periods possible, and she triumphed above it. The canonicity of this created version doesn't matter, because we know for a fact that she carried the Suou empire on her shoulders sometime during her birth to present day, which _is_ the postwar period. I confess I have little patience for people who cannot see her greatness. Her son disappointed her so bitterly, and let's face it, everyone – in real life, as an outsider, you would judge Anne-Sophie for carrying on with a married man, wouldn't you? You sure you won't think of Yuzuru as a typical sleazy rich womanizer? All that stuff about "because he is the person I chose for myself" – let's see you in real life if your spouse/partner/girlfriend/boyfriend dares to say that to you when you find out s/he has been cheating on you, then we talk. Or even better, since Anne-Sophie was the one who said it – let's see the third party say that to you after s/he cheats with _your_ partner, and then we'll see who's side you're on.

The thing is, Shizue has led a life of duty. She did everything she had to, and did it perfectly. She did it without complaint. SHE DID IT. Can you really not see from her perspective? Can you really not understand why Yuzuru was a disappointing son? She wanted him to be perfect, and to that end she arranged a marriage and arranged an empire for him to take over. Is she to be blamed for arranging a marriage when it is the norm for them, when her own marriage was arranged? She did what she thought was best, and the only thing she required of him was to be a competent heir in whose reliable hands she can pass on her _entire life's work_! That Shizue's marriage worked out well is a matter of luck, and even then she lost her pillar of support when her husband died early. She may be privileged, but her life has been _hard_. Why can't people recognise this in her?! Just because Anne-Sophie is lying in a bed and she isn't? In truth if you look at Shizue's personality, she would have grit her teeth and persevered even if her marriage happened to be absolutely awful. Yuzuru didn't have that mettle. He ran off and caused scandals, and he never managed to get her to have faith in him – he never managed to get her to change her mind, which itself already tells you that she has got the stronger character by far.

And, she wouldn't have been that disappointed and angry with Yuzuru if she hadn't loved him. This is another truth. There is no disappointment without expectation, and there is no betrayal without love. Loads of fans love Tamaki, right? Many treat Tamaki like their baby, the emotional attachment is mad because he's so perfect. Okay, so let's imagine a situation in which a decade and a half later, Tamaki encounters someone who he decides he truly loves. This new woman is The One for him. He starts something with her because apparently this love is so great that neither of them can control themselves. Do you feel disappointed and angry? Will you ever be able to forgive this purely as a fan who adores a fictional character?

But wait, you say! Tamaki would NEVER do that. Well, guess what – Shizue believed that of her son too. She was obviously accustomed to being obeyed by Yuzuru, which means that Yuzuru was probably an obedient child who likely fulfilled as many of her expectations as he could. Thus, she had reason to believe that her son is honourable, hardworking, capable, _good_. She was a mother, she believed in the goodness of her only child. To her, it felt like Yuzuru threw all of her love and kindness back in her face, and that's why from then onwards she refused to hand over her empire to him or Tamaki.

And wait, you say! But Tamaki loves Haruhi, while Yuzuru never loved his wife! – So? You see, Yuzuru owed a duty to his wife. He mentioned his wife was also cheating on him, in which case wouldn't it be better to bring this to his mother's attention as the _best reason to obtain a divorce_ of all?! If Yuzuru's wife was cheating on him, then she is shaming the Suou name, and Shizue has every reason to be furious at this insult. That would solve his problem and wouldn't cause him to be estranged from his mother. But really the reason why it makes no difference is because many people claim to still love their spouse when they cheat. It was a loss of control, I just feel more strongly for him/her, etc. etc. It is not a matter of love. It is a matter of duty and self-control, two concepts that meant the world to Shizue. She had led her life by those concepts, she has endured and sacrificed in their name. By having an illegitimate child, Yuzuru proved to her that he lacks a sense of duty and self-control. All right, we'll cover our bases, improbable though they are: what if Shizue asks him to put up with his wife's infidelity? At that stage, it seems like a great solution to _directly ask her_ what she expects him to do! Does this mean he's got permission now to go out and find his own lover? Does this mean she wants him to stop the wife? How does she think he can stop the wife? Does this mean she doesn't care if the wife _ends up carrying a baby that isn't a Suou heir_?!

Wait, you still say! Tamaki is an innocent! If she wants to be angry, she should just take it out on Yuzuru, who is the true culprit in the wrong. Yes. Have you ever lashed out at someone else because another person had upset you? Would you like to experience the feeling of looking at a person who represents everything that went wrong and all the disgusted rage that resulted from that dirty, guilty offence? For many, just the knowledge of the person's existence is enough to chafe at them for a lifetime. Reacting kindly and generously to Tamaki would make you a saint, but reacting poorly and bitterly towards Tamaki _wouldn't_ make you a devil. It simply makes you _human_.

Ugh. Haters gonna hate, but I'll defend her to the death. They've got no idea what she's made of.

**Ootori**

Here is the description we get in the manga, Chapter 33 page 3: "The Ootori family name is a venerable one, descended from a noble ducal bloodline. Long before the conglomerate was established, we were making our mark in the medical field. At present, we're involved in hospital management and are at the forefront of the health services industry."

So as mentioned, Kyouya's mother would have descended from one of the most aristocratic families since Heian times. Again, same as the Suous and Hitachiins, this family would have stayed at court for the continued prestige. All of these noble courtier families are rather useless after the heyday of their political power, and the major significance that they have is to impart cultural and scholarly learning to the rest of society as time went on. They still occupied important positions, of course – they would have been politicians and such, but during the Great Depression as Japan became increasingly militarized and fascist military leaders came to power again, they wouldn't have been in the driving seat for modern history.

For the Ootori male-line side, they are one of those 'affluent pedigree families' that rose to rival the Haninozukas' esteemed position after the Haninozukas had land and wealth stripped from them (Chapter 5B, this fic). Like the Suous, they would have jumped during the Meiji Restoration and involved themselves with the rapid industrialization especially in the realm of medical treatment and western medicine. This is important because it is the means by which the Ootori family surpassed the Haninozukas and how they brought themselves on level with the Suous – through the Kazoku.

The initial rank distribution for Kazoku houses of kuge descent depended on the highest possible office to which its ancestors had been entitled in the imperial court. Thus, the heirs of the five regent houses (go-seike) of the Fujiwara dynasty (Konoe, Takatsukasa, Kujō, Ichijō, and Nijō) all became princes. The heads of other kuge houses (including Daigo, Hamuro, Kumamoto, Hirohata, Kazan'in, Kikutei, Koga, Nakamikado, Nakayama, Oinomikado, Saga, Sanjo, Saionji, Shijō, and Tokudaiji) became marquesses.

Can you spot Okiko's and Mitsue's bloodlines in there? Well, the head of the Ootori kuge house became a marquesse, because he didn't previously occupy as exalted a position as the Suous in the imperial court. However, some clans were promoted to the rank of prince/duke for their role in the Meiji Restoration, and the Ootori family would have been one of those because of outstanding contributions in the medical and pharmaceutical field. From there, it fulfils the "descended from a noble ducal bloodline" bit, and also you can see that they have gone one rank ahead of the Haninozuka family relatively recently, but despite now occupying the same duke rank as the Suou family, they are newer… and as we know, when it comes to blood, old trumps nouveau any time.

Hence why in the fic, both Kyouya and Mitsukuni refer to the other's parents as '-sama'. Because there has been a sort of equalization of their families, and they both choose to err on the side of too much courtesy by using the more respectful honorific. (As a correction: Kyouya does occasionally refer to his friends' parents by name. He calls the twins' mother 'Yuzuha-san', and although he refers to Suou Yuzuru as 'Chairman' both when speaking to him and when Yuzuru is not present, in the manga he has also been known to use 'Yuzuru-shi' when he is speaking of Yuzuru in Yuzuru's absence.)

(j) Okay, that's enough. Gosh, so much to absorb. This is a special chapter; special chapters should be short, and I have no idea why this is so lengthy. It is compensation for not updating for so long, I guess. Maybe it's because Takashi is such a joy to write – currently he knows the most out of all of them, therefore his perspective is the best to use to dump information on the readers. Imagine if I ever did a special chapter from _Kazuha's_ point of view. _Unthinkable_. It'll probably be 100,000 words long or something, and then we're all gonna beg for mercy 'cos we wouldn't even make it halfway through before our brains explode.

Oh, _Takashi_. :'D

(k) Oh, this reminds me! I have wanted to tell this to you, the readers, for a while now, but again I keep forgetting because really there are tons of information and I have _files_ of notes related to this fic. It gets overwhelming, I'm sorry. Anyway, the point is:

**I solemnly promise to tell you the end of this story. **

Yes, I do. But this is not the same as a promise to finish this fic. I love this story, and thus I have stuck with it and I am always burning with the desire to tell it. However, I recognise that real life may get in the way. So what you, the reader, get from me is a promise that I will try my best, but more importantly, **if**** ever I decide that it is no longer feasible for me to continue writing this story, I will post a final chapter that is a blow-by-blow account of the entire story narrative.**

Because I recognise that one of the most frustrating things about reading fic, and one of the main reasons some people refuse to read works-in-progress is that they may never find out what happens in the end. I AGREE. I feel you. I get it.

Meaning, if I become aware that I cannot continue this story, a blow-by-blow account will be something like:

"_Continuing from the last chapter, what happens from here on out is that this event takes place, that event takes place, we have a crisis on our hands!_

_Details, details, Kyouya does this, details, event, Yuuichi does that, event, event – _

_Kaoru loses against Kiyomi and dies, Akito becomes heir. The end!"_

See? So at least the story will be finished in your head even if it wasn't told in complete prose. Also, haha, don't worry, none of the stuff used in the fake example will happen. Oop, spoiler!

We shall call this last resort chapter the Kazuha Chapter. Okay? This is my way of honouring all of you, who have stayed with me for years already. I promise, so please read this fic in peace.

.

_Next Chapter:_

_7. Corporate World OMG!_


	28. Chapter 7A

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

**Corporate World OMG!**

.

"See you later, senpais!" the four of them say in a dissonant chorus as they crawl out of the limousine through all of its available doors. "Have a great day at uni!"

Though the early morning fog, some of their female schoolmates milling around the drop-off point erupt into delighted squeals of, "Kyaaa! It's Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai!" as they hurry over to speak to the seniors.

Kyouya smoothly places himself in front of them to block their way, cutting them off with a suave smile. "Ladies, our seniors are late; let's not hold them up."

It's rubbish. Right now it's only slightly past 8, and neither of their seniors have any lectures that begin before 9:30 am any day of the week. Kyouya doesn't want anyone anywhere near the seniors because of the little furry bundle resting in Mori's lap, the tiny treasure that he's willing to entrust only to Mori.

The girls twitter disappointedly, but suddenly remember that today is Kyouya's birthday and launch into a barrage of well wishes as Kyouya leads them into the school building where they will be far, far, far, _far_ away from his kitten.

"Wait up, Kyouya!" Tamaki seizes his bag and flings himself after the crowd.

Shaking his head, Hikaru remarks incredulously, "Kyouya-senpai is obsessed, he is."

Kaoru snorts in agreement.

"Agh, but senpai is finally gone now," Hikaru smiles fiendishly, crouching over to peer at the kitten. It is butting its head against Mori's palm in its wobbly efforts to turn around. "So I can finally pat this thing. Ooooh! Oh my god, it's so soft! So _cuuuteee_!"

A chilly breeze picks up behind them, and Hikaru whirls around in fright. Kaoru catches sight of his expression and laughs so hard he thinks he might die.

"What!" Hikaru protests, embarrassed and relieved. His hand is clapped over his heart, and his breath is coming out in short gasps. "God, I thought he came back!"

"Then don't touch something that belongs to Kyouya-senpai," Kaoru chokes out, still crying with laughter. Honey kindly hands him a tissue, and he dabs at the edges of his eyes.

"But it's so unfair! How come only Mori-senpai gets to handle it?! Mori-senpai even has to help Kyouya-senpai bring it home!"

"I don't mind," Mori says, looking at Kaoru intently. Kaoru gazes back at him questioningly, feeling quite uncomfortable. Since late yesterday evening Mori has been doing this, and there is a sinking weight in his stomach that makes Kaoru think he has done something horribly wrong. "What are the both of you doing after school?"

"Going to your house, senpai," Hikaru replies in a 'duh' tone, trying to grab the kitten's twitching tail. "Didn't you say you'd tutor me for exams? It's not like you to forget!"

"I need to study as well," Kaoru answers. "But, uh, I thought I'd stay at the library." Actually he needs to go off with Hacker-san to recruit more people to their team, but it's not like he wants people to find out about it.

"Eh? Library?" Hikaru asks, surprised. "I thought you'd get Kyouya-senpai to help you."

"N-Naah. He's busy. I'll study on my own." Kaoru takes hold of Hikaru's arm. "Come on, let's go in."

"Kaoru." Mori stops them.

"Does Kao-chan want to come along with Hika-chan for Takashi to teach the both of you?" Honey pipes up. "Both Takashi and I will be there to help."

"It's fine, senpais." Kaoru forces an unforced smile. "I need to study by myself first before I know which areas I'll need additional assistance for. Thanks anyway!"

He closes the car door on them and raps his knuckles on the shiny black finish to signal the chauffeur, and promptly drags Hikaru in.

"Oy! Slow down!" Hikaru grumbles. "What's up with you?"

"I need to submit some forms to the school office!" he lies. Grinning, he continues, "It's a concept called responsibility, Hikaru. Here, I'll spell it for you so you can take proper notes for your learning: R – E – S – P – "

He darts away just as his twin makes to thwack him, flitting in the direction of the Administrative building trailing an evil cackle behind him.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Frantically, Kaoru paces up and down inside the restroom, wringing his hands and glancing out of the window every few seconds. Down on the ground floor and in the distance beyond the courtyard is a cluster of boys that constitute his best and closest friends, and they are showing no signs of _leaving_.

Despite the fact that the end-of-school bell rang more than fifteen minutes ago, despite the fact that they all have plenty of things to do, despite the fact that exams are next week and everyone needs to be studying till they drop.

The university seniors had come to pick Hikaru up, and Kaoru can't help but feel that Mori is there to make sure that he goes with them. Which is mad, of course. Just paranoia.

_What did I do wrong?!_

Nothing makes sense anymore. It was difficult enough inventing an excuse to switch his position in the bed last night so that he wouldn't spend it beside Kyouya. Even then he hadn't been able to fall asleep from the stuffy pressure in his chest and racing thoughts in his head. What did he do wrong? What a stupid question! _Everything_, obviously. Everything is wrong now because Kaoru was and is stupid. Why does he always seem to create problems instead of solving them?

_Oh. Oh god._ He stops abruptly.

_Mori-senpai doesn't know, does he? _His body starts to shake with dread, his fingernails carving into his palm. _He can't know!_

Clutching at the windowsill, he searches the grounds for his friends again. _They're still here._

He removes himself from view just in case. Someone makes a whimpering sound of despair, and it takes him half a minute to realise it was him. _No. No, Mori-senpai can't have found out that fast. He's brilliant, but he's not god. Not even Mori-senpai can figure out something that quickly without help._

Utilising Honey's techniques, he compels his breathing to slow. _Yes. Focus, Kaoru, damn it. You can keep a secret._

_You have to be better at hiding it this time round._

A vibrating buzz in his blazer causes him to jump out of his skin. He fishes it out and nearly drops it when he sees who's calling. Luckily his cover story places him in the library, therefore he lets it ring on without picking it up, knowing that he would be able to tell Kyouya and the rest of his friends that he had put his phone on silent. Usually, at least 95% of the time, he is the type to keep his mobile close enough for him to almost always answer a call, especially since he had begun taking over management of the club. He will say that he didn't want anything to distract from his studying, and hopefully that will be plausible enough.

Cautiously, Kaoru allows himself to sneak another peek outside. He can't see any details, and he can only identify them by hair colour and by height. A redhead is standing with two other people with jet-black hair and two other people with golden blond hair.

The phone stops ringing.

Mere seconds later, it beeps with a message:_ Who said I'm too busy? Come down now; we're waiting for you._

Kaoru stares at the screen. Something hurts really badly, and inexplicably he really wants to cry.

But they're running out of time. Snatching his keyring out of his pocket, he jabs a button almost viciously and barks out, "Hacker-san, I'm stuck at school because my friends won't leave. Get me out of here."

For the next two minutes he stands there fretting, and when he sees a redhead start to walk towards the building where the senior library is located he _really_ begins to panic –

And without warning, the entire school loses power.

Halfway through the garden, the redhead pauses in his tracks and looks around in puzzlement. He retraces his steps to the group of people in periwinkle blue blazers waiting beside two cars, and apparently after a short discussion decides to pursue his previous course of action.

_Come on, Hacker-san!_

Something rumbles ominously inside the walls. Vaguely alarmed, Kaoru turns in the direction of the sound, not knowing what he's looking for.

At this point, shouts and screams from the courtyard recapture his attention. Gallons and gallons of water are gushing out from the fancy fountains, exploding upwards and outwards to cause damage over a large radius, and all of the pools and ponds have flooded with a frightful speed and relentlessness, making students scramble everywhere in absolute pandemonium.

His friends have retreated too, either ducking inside the cars or behind the cars on the far side.

Soon, Kaoru becomes aware that the screams are coming from inside the building as well –and because he understands what's going on, he grabs his bag off the floor and runs. The instant he exits the restroom he was in, he hears the unmistakeable roar of water spraying out from the taps. Across the corridor, he sees the girls fleeing from their own restroom with wet hair and dresses and distressed faces.

Without a moment to lose, he weaves his way through the confused throng of students and races to the other side of the sprawling grounds where he throws himself inside the getaway car waiting for him in a side road outside the school gate.

"Go," Hacker-san orders the driver.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

"I wouldn't have, Kaoru-san," Hacker-san insists sullenly from the other side of the changing curtain. "I knew exactly which toilet you were in. You're completely dry, aren't you?"

"Hur," Kaoru tells her, still winded. They are at a small, currently deserted fashion workshop near Tokyo University for Kaoru to change into a disguise – they'd agreed that they mustn't be careless when approaching new people. "And, you wrecked one of the top schools of this country."

He unzips the bag and takes out the clothes he'd prepared beforehand. As he slips the dress over his head, he hears a crunching that sounds very much like, "Seaweed snack _again_, Hacker-san? Do you ever eat anything else?"

Sweeping the curtain aside, he steps out and heads to the lighted mirror where he drops his things on the counter. Stuffing his school uniform inside his bag, he begins to wad up balls of tissue paper that he can use as padding for his non-existent breasts. Then he styles his wig and does a bit of makeup, and finally finishes off with suitable accessories.

A girl inside the mirror blinks back at him.

Kaoru smiles approvingly at his own skill, clicking his makeup case shut. He's virtually unrecognisable like this and he knows it. "Let's go."

"You're really vain, Kaoru-san," Hacker-san says as they leave the workshop.

"Huh?!" Kaoru screeches at her, insulted. "It's not so much that I'm vain than it is that you don't have any personal grooming at all! When was the last time you washed your hair?! Or exfoliated your skin?!"

"It's a waste of time and money to do all that," Hacker-san says matter-of-factly as they walk down the pavement. "Only rich girls can manage it."

"Not true!" Kaoru disagrees heatedly. "There're so many products aimed at commoners in every single drugstore and department store! The cosmetics market is so saturated!"

They pass several young men, all of whom turn to gawk at Kaoru when he strides by in his heels. "Yes, Kaoru-san, but you know, no commoner woman looks like you. You look like the sort who will bleed a man dry."

"Not everyone can afford a Hitachiin," Kaoru informs her in a superior undertone.

"So I don't know why Kaoru-san thinks it is believable for you to pose as my girlfriend," she complains.

"Well it's more believable than _you_ pretending to be my girlfriend," Kaoru shoots back cattily.

They cross the last street and reach their destination.

"Right." Kaoru puts his hand in hers for her to lead because she once attended this university and knows it far better than he does. "Oh god, remind me to buy you a hand cream."

She rolls her eyes and sets off purposefully. "You're so _vain_, Kaoru-san. Maybe you should think about marrying one of your rich club friends rather than end up with a woman who will compete with you."

Caught off guard by her statement, Kaoru nearly misses a step. He lets Hacker-san think that it is because of the height of his shoes even though any self-respecting Hitachiin should be able to jog in heels, and she takes it as proof that vanity is not only pointless but also harmful.

"Ah! There she is!" Hacker-san points, and through the glass Kaoru spots Yukina Yumeji in front of a class of students who are gathering up their notebooks and pens and clearly preparing to leave at the end of their lesson.

"Damn," Kaoru murmurs. "We were meant to crash the lecture so it wouldn't be too suspicious when we go up to her."

Hacker-san tugs on his hand. "I have another idea, Kaoru-san."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

In the computer lab, Hacker-san accesses the online learning system to download the materials from Yukina Yumeji's other subjects. "Yukina-sama specialises in cognitive psychology and social psychology, as Kaoru-san knows. But Yukina-sama is also teaching the first year experimental psychology unit this semester because one of her colleagues has gone on maternity leave."

The printer heats up and spits out a couple of pages.

Kaoru nods. "She would be least likely to recognise first year students, so with any luck she might not be able to say for sure if we are meant to be there or not."

"Yes." Hacker-san gives him the notes. "This was the assigned reading for today."

"Good. I'll find something I don't understand so well and get her to explain it." Kaoru settles himself in a chair to begin reading.

Hacker-san smiles toothily at him.

"… What?"

"Kaoru-san is a hardworking boss."

"… So?"

"I approve."

Kaoru glares at her. "No. I approve you. You don't approve me. You have no idea how this works, do you?"

She slumps dejectedly. "But I work hard for you. I gave PAIS-LE to you."

The guilt lands on him in a crushing and unexpected blow. "I'm sorry," he apologises gently. "I know you do. I practically asked for your firstborn child, didn't I?"

Hacker-san doesn't respond. She has an unfortunate tendency of sulking, yet she has the temerity to say 'like master, like servant'. Just from his dealings with her alone, Kaoru must have accumulated sufficient good karma to atone for all his past misdeeds.

"You know," Kaoru tells her compassionately, "if anyone can make a worldwide success of your PAIS-LE, it would be Kyouya-senpai. And I did ask for your bot back after they have their own prototype – Kyouya-senpai is not one to forget his friends' requests, so it will come back to you. Okay? Really." He forces her to meet his eyes. "I get it, okay? In my father's company, you felt that you always worked really hard and your superiors didn't and yet they ordered you around and took credit for your work. This isn't a corporate environment. I won't do that, all right?"

She smiles again. "Well, every parent wants their child to become an icon."

"Exactly," Kaoru laughs.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

The door of the office marked 'Associate Professor Yukina Yumeji' is slightly ajar when they arrive at the right place after a fair bit of hunting. These academics are always tucked away in difficult-to-reach places, like individual insects in a colony hard at work in their respective cells.

Gingerly, Kaoru knocks with the timorousness of a student. "Yukina-junkyōju?" He pushes the door lightly and pokes his head in.

There is a boy propped up against the side of the teacher's desk, messenger bag slung over one shoulder and across his chest. His arms are folded and he looks bored; Kaoru estimates his age to be around that of Hacker-san's. Another student, then? Somehow he looks familiar to Kaoru, and Kaoru ransacks his mind for the missing puzzle piece.

"Come in," drawls the boy lazily, giving off an annoying air of presumptuousness.

Kaoru enters the room as per his invitation. The boy's dark eyes land on him and he suddenly straightens himself up from his too-cool-for-school slouch, becoming more alert as his mouth curves into a smile.

When he greets Kaoru with a low, suggestive, "_Hello_", Kaoru barely refrains from a facepalm and a shriek of hysterical laughter.

Not wanting to break character, Kaoru is on the verge of returning a shy "Hello" when Hacker-san decides that she doesn't want to hang about outside to wait after all. "Hey, you," she snaps, using the rudest form of 'you' possible and actually acting like a decent boyfriend, "Keep it in your pants, asshole."

By this stage Kaoru is desperately suppressing laughter and his cheeks are going pink from the effort. It passes for a blush, and he prays to whatever deity that this boy and Hacker-san do not continue their argument.

The boy rolls his eyes and jerks his head to indicate some chairs, letting out a calculated yawn. "Yukina-sensei will be back in a couple of minutes."

Hacker-san pulls out a chair for Kaoru but refuses to sit herself, choosing instead to stand there and fume. Nonplussed at her protectiveness, Kaoru crosses his legs in a ladylike manner and sets his papers and file down at a small corner of the desk.

"Oh?" the guy speaks up, deliberately charming, "You know, I can tutor you if you want." He leans closer to Kaoru than necessary. "I'm always happy to help any juniors."

Kaoru is struck by an awful feeling that this dude is just trying to piss off Hacker-san now. It's worse because, objectively speaking, the boy is handsome and it's obvious from his body language that he knows it.

"Hah!" Hacker-san stares him down, full of contempt and derision. "You're only a second year! Aren't you ashamed by your lack of accomplishment at this age? Don't make me laugh."

_Oh god._ No, in fact it is the worst because objectively speaking, Hacker-san is extremely intelligent and she never hesitates to lord it over others.

From the boy's expression, Kaoru knows that Hacker-san has just pushed a hot button of his regardless of whether it was an accident or not.

He stalks over to her and grabs the front of her shirt. "What do _you_ know about it, scumbag? We're probably the same age and it's not like you're some bigshot yourself, don't talk so big just because you've got a hot girlfriend!"

Kaoru had risen up off his chair. "H-Hey! Don't fight!"

"I don't _need_ to be a bigshot to be _better_ than you," Hacker-san ripostes, smacking his hand away with a strength Kaoru had not known she possessed. "You're right, we would have been in the same year level at school but you're _one year older than me_ and I've already graduated with top honours, so I guess you've inherited none of your father's and your aunt's genius, eh?"

_That's right! _Hacker-san's words prompt Kaoru's memory – she had done comprehensive research into the associate professor's background, and that included checking out her family members and compiling basic profiles complete with photographs for Kaoru. _That's who he is – he's Yukina Yumeji's nephew!_

"Stop!" Kaoru commands, inserting himself between the two of them to defuse the situation. "I'm sorry, Mitsuya-san. It is Mitsuya Masanori-san, isn't it? I apologise."

The boy's eyes widen even further in shock, and after a tense moment, he nods tightly and backs down.

Kaoru whirls around to rebuke his own employee. She has subsided, but they have already given enough away. _What do you think you were doing?!_

_He started it._ The sentiment is painted all over her features along with the first creeping hints of remorse. With her head she makes these twitchy movements like she wants Kaoru to leave with her now, and Kaoru bites back a sigh as he tries to convey his refusal with a pointed stare. She keeps twitching.

…Wait, does she want to confer with him privately? Or what?

Crap, they've still got a ton of communication issues to work on.

Apparently concluding that what she's got to say is too important to wait, Hacker-san takes hold of his wrist to drag him out. Kaoru follows compliantly, having had enough drama for the day – before they get to the door, however, the Associate Professor comes through it briskly with a towering stack of photocopied material, heading to her cluttered desk with an equally no-nonsense, "Ask your questions, quickly. You'd better have done your readings beforehand and tried to solve it yourself, otherwise I suggest you leave now before I remember your face and unload the full force of my wrath on you next lecture."

With a loud whumping sound, she dumps the stuff down and glances up with a thoroughly frightening and entirely wicked grin.

For a moment Kaoru swears he sees that fabled monster – The Hitachiin Woman – in front of him. Hacker-san lets out an involuntary, "Eek," and shuffles behind Kaoru for protection.

"Too late!" the associate professor announces in a voice that generally accompanies the gleeful rubbing of hands and peals of triumphant villainous laughter. "If your question is stupid, be prepared to gratefully and obediently receive your deserved whipping in class!"

Yes, Kaoru is terrified, but he is also _thrilled_.

His mouth pulls into a smile that cannot be stifled, for he recognises this as the phenomenon that his mother is always talking about: meeting a person who you know deep within is a perfect fit, a person who is meant for you and you for this person, a kindred spirit, an inevitable meeting of fate. Sometimes the feeling strikes like a thunderbolt, and sometimes it is like the formation of star systems, where all the bits and pieces come together only with the progression of time – where the people involved have been revolving around each other for a while before everything coagulates together to reveal a big, breath-taking picture of that same inevitability.

All Hitachiin employees, students and servants – whether atelier, ikebana school, household or administrative and professional staff – are hired this way, first by instinct, then by qualifications. Their family accepts and embraces the fact that some people are naturally connected in ways that transcend the realm of the explainable; it is true that they especially select their lovers as such, but it is not just lovers who are graced by destiny. Friends and all other close associates too are either meant to be, or not meant to be… Hitachiins are unhindered by silly mortal things like rationality and traditions (except those that they create and bind themselves with), and Kaoru feels that he has just encountered his very own Tachibana-san.

Associate Professor of Psychology at University of Tokyo, Yukina Yumeji, née Mitsuya, age 31, birthday April 30, wife or sister to game developers Yukina Izumi (31 years old) and only brother Mitsuya Ryouta (45 years old), aunt to Mitsuya Masanori (24 years old) with no kids of her own and clearly as attractive as her nephew, raises an eyebrow. "Well? Speak."

"So _cool_," Hacker-san mumbles faintly behind Kaoru, evidently starstruck.

"U-Um," Kaoru proceeds tentatively, "I'm in the first-year Experimental Psychology… About the use of placebos when conducting research – the text says that the effect of placebo is very different in different diseases, and the listed articles in our readings include those that are for and against its use – which means that is it all right if in our exams we – "

"Yumeji-bachan, I'm happy to teach her if you want." The boy is observing them too keenly, and Kaoru doesn't like it. Hacker-san doesn't react due to Yukina's presence.

Yukina looks more taken aback than is warranted. _Maybe this guy never ever makes such generous offers_, Kaoru thinks, and resolves not to allow himself to go off with a shady guy like that. He hopes to goodness that the associate professor is of the same mind.

"Is that so?" She turns back to Kaoru, unexpectedly guarded and shrewd. "Would you like my nephew to help you instead?"

Something about her manner throws Kaoru, and his brain races to find the trap in her inquiry. "No," he replies as calmly as he can. "It's only the one question, sensei."

"Do you know each other?" she probes, now curious. "In that case, shouldn't you already have helped her rather than bothering me, Masanori."

Her nephew remains infuriatingly silent, and in the end Kaoru is compelled to answer. "No, sensei, Mitsuya-san and I met mere minutes ago."

Immediately Yukina takes on her slasher grin again, except it's far more malicious this time and Kaoru cannot help taking a step back. "Who are you?" she demands as her nephew goes to the door and closes it, closes them in. Kaoru tries not to let his trepidation show. "Are you even my student?"

Genuinely confused, Kaoru stammers with wide-eyed girlish innocence, harmless as a baby lamb, "W-What?"

Hacker-san pulls him back to her, activating her boyfriend mode again. She really is shockingly protective of him – how had he not realised before today? "Okay, game is up. Yukina-sensei, actually, we are here with a job offer for you. Don't panic, we won't tell anyone about him." She thrusts her chin in the boy's direction dismissively. "Would you be willing to hear us out?"

"What job offer?" Yukina crosses her arms apprehensively.

Kaoru lowers himself onto the chair, taking himself out of the equation as a key player. Hacker-san has authority to negotiate for him, and the card up their sleeve, the card that should be played last, is Kaoru's identity. He'd told Hacker-san that he would do this as a contingency, and Hacker-san demonstrates her understanding by helping to seat him, as though she wants him out of the way because she's the one in the rightful position to talk. Kaoru surreptitiously tightens his grip on her forearm. _Where did we slip up?_

In answer, Hacker-san rolls her eyes at the guy blocking the exit. _Him._

"We have been sent here to inquire about your amenability to act as a personal consultant, Yukina-sensei. This job will not require you to quit your career as an academic – it has irregular, non-office hours, and it is very challenging and exciting. Does that sound like it is worth considering, sensei, or should we save our breath?"

"Don't be fooled, Yumeji-bachan," the boy chips in almost before Hacker-san finishes her sales pitch. "The girl's the boss here, not that asshole."

_Sharp._ Kaoru is grudgingly impressed that the guy sussed out that much from the singular, spur-of-the-moment, power-reversing act of reeling Hacker-san back in, although he waits until he ascertains that Yukina trusts her nephew's judgement implicitly, then he stands back up. In concession, he dips his head mildly. "Very good, Mitsuya-san."

"Igarashi," Hacker-san corrects him apologetically. "He was born Mitsuya Masanori, but after his time in juvenile institutions he became Igarashi Masanori, taking on his mother's maiden name when their whole family petitioned to have their surname changed with the stated reason being to give this guy a fresh chance at life. Nobody on campus knows him as Mitsuya, and nobody knows he is Yukina Yumeji's nephew either, especially because they are only aged 7 years apart. His father, Igarashi Ryouta, and Yukina-sensei's husband Yukina Izumi, both used their skills to remove as many digital traces of this guy's previous life as possible."

_In other words,_ Kaoru thinks irritably at his employee, _everything is your fault, Hacker-san. You let him provoke you, and everything came out!_

"You!" Igarashi growls. "What the hell is this?! Who are you?!"

While Hacker-san hopefully has the grace to wallow in guilt and self-blame, Kaoru takes charge at last. "The job description is that of a personal consultant, though the role itself is more dynamic and difficult to quantify than that. The things you will do include but are not limited to: research, analysis, occasional spying, helping to devise strategies and plans of action. You will be well compensated, and your expertise is very much valued, or we wouldn't be here. If it matters, sensei, you are also the first choice for this role. The one thing we need in return, apart from your skills, is undivided and unwavering loyalty. Are you interested, Yukina-junkyōju?"

"You don't care to introduce yourself first?" she asks, amused and angry at once.

Without aggression or antagonism, but with no intention to relent either, Kaoru tells her simply, "No."

She lets out a bark of laughter. "Fine. I'll play. I'm interested. So?"

"Ba-chan!" Igarashi protests, storming to her side. "At least we need to know their names!" He glares at Hacker-san.

"This is Horiuchi Yoshi and I am Sadamoto Akemi." _If you haven't removed your _own_ previous lives from the net, Hacker-san, I'm going to kill you._

"Yeah _right_," Igarashi scoffs. "And I'm Smiley Face."

Without skipping a beat, Kaoru greets him back. "Nice to meet you, Smiley-san."

"Don't fuck with me; I know for sure they aren't your real names."

"Oh? How do you know, Igarashi-san?" Kaoru says, intrigued.

"Don't use my real name if you won't deign to use your own! You haven't worn these names for long enough!" he snaps. "They feel like ill-fitting clothing on you!"

After frowning contemplatively at 'Smiley-san' for a few moments, Kaoru comments, "You know, Smiley-san, you're not bad yourself."

"Huh? I'm studying psychology too, aren't I?!" he exclaims impatiently. "And that aside, I'll have you know I'm _brilliant_. I have a flair for human relations. A paper doesn't prove anything." He sneers at Hacker-san.

Before Hacker-san can insult him further with something disastrous like, "It proved you were in _jail_," Kaoru hastily intervenes with, "Can you drive?", because Hacker-san can't and he can't and they really need a more reliable driver than the one she engaged for today.

"NO!" Hacker-san objects in an ear-splitting screech. "NOOOO!"

Smiley-san claps his hands over his ears. "What the?! Stop it!"

Kaoru threatens her with a stern glare. "What are Smiley-san's qualifications?"

Oh, _now_ she shuts up with an unconvincing shrug.

When Kaoru keeps glaring, she shrugs harder. "I don't know!"

"If you don't tell me," Kaoru says to her sweetly, "_he_ gets to tell me."

Bitterly, she recites, "Igarashi Masanori, age 24, born 21 July, second year student of Psychology at Todai, is a complete idiot."

Smiley-san takes offence, and the both of them descend into a vitriolic argument with each other. Kaoru sighs deeply, feeling the beginnings of a headache start to pound at the back of his head.

"Long day?" Yukina asks amiably, grabbing a nearby water jug to pour a glass of water for him.

"Quite." Kaoru nods, accepting it appreciatively. "You?"

"Ugh," she agrees, so eloquent in just one expressive groan. "Students piss me off."

"And yet you teach," Kaoru says dryly.

"Because I want them to learn," she explains. "But god knows that most students are inattentive in class, and they really just don't care. They would rather be anywhere than here, in the premier institution of learning in all of Japan, to educate themselves and improve their minds."

"I get it," Kaoru sympathises. "It's annoying when you're seriously passionate about something, and other people aren't. If you didn't have to bother with them, it's fine, but it's just wasting your time if you have to be responsible for them."

"Isn't it,"Yukina laments, sipping at her own glass. "So if you can offer me something exhilarating, I'll take it."

"I don't know about 'exhilarating'," Kaoru admits, "but it will definitely be suspenseful, at least. In fact I prefer for it not to get too exciting, because our opponent is strong."

"Wouldn't excitement benefit you, then? Unpredictability favours no one, which means that it actually favours those in a weaker position, those who cannot win conventionally."

"No, thank you," Kaoru rejects it, shuddering at the thought of an 'exciting' battle with Yuuichi and Kiyomi. "Shall we talk business, then?"

"Sure," she acquiesces easily. "As soon as you tell me what this is really all about."

"Forming a team," Kaoru tells her succinctly. "Like bodyguards, except not physical. I need backup in my life that I can call for."

"Ahh. So you are the boss of everything, not just the boss in relation to her." Yukina gestures vaguely at Hacker-san.

"Yes."

"Who is she to you?"

"My source of information. My hacker," Kaoru says with the weariness of a parent. "When did you realise she's female?"

"Seconds ago," Yukina replies casually. "When I postulated my speculation and you didn't contradict me. But perhaps it was the scream. It was unnervingly high-pitched. I'd seen grown men scream like that before, of course, much as they try to pretend only women scream that way – but I suppose your hacker's facial features do look a bit girlish. Well, it was worth a shot, right?"

"Right," Kaoru confirms convivially.

She smirks at the shouting couple. "Can't wait for Masanori to figure it out."

" – but what your parents really should have changed is your STUPID _NAME_!" Hacker-san rails, the apples of her cheeks red with fury. "Masanori, my arse! Which part of you is a model of justice?! YOU are the problem, you should – "

" – go hang yourself!" Smiley-san rants at her, eyes popping out of their sockets. "How do you live under the weight of your _HUMONGOUS_ EGO?! You aren't even the most highly educated person in this room, much less the whole fucking world! If you're so great then why aren't you – "

" – still languishing in school?! Because you think you're so _cool_," Hacker-san taunts, "you thought a criminal life would make you _all that _– I bet your life dream is really just to target some rich lady with your cool charm and your imagined sexiness and live off her money like some _despicable_ – "

" – insufferable, unbelievable _bastard_! God!" Smiley-san lets fly the curses. "I have never encountered anyone like you! You think with your shitty personality that you are going to go far in life?! Because let me tell you something, people _love_ me! They do things for me because I know how to make them feel special! Can you even – "

Yukina accepts the file that Kaoru passes to her. "You came prepared."

"Just a little test," Kaoru says politely. "Please tell me what you think of the people described in that short story. Their motivations, their fears, their desires – anything that strikes you."

The story is a page plus two paragraphs long, quite sparse and almost in the style of children's bedtime stories, but with sufficient action within the narrative for a judicious reader to begin fleshing out the characters. It tells a small quirky tale of a pair of brothers, one older and one younger, who fall for a girl who enrols into their school. The younger brother discovers his crush first, and accidentally reveals both his heart and his older brother's heart to said oblivious older brother. The younger brother chooses not to contend, and the story ends with the girl wanting neither of them anyway.

Yukina reads it and processes the information at the marvellous speed of a professional. When she opens her mouth to deliver her preliminary analysis, she tells him of an older brother filled to the brim with protective instincts, who feels too much but lacks the skills and outlets to express them constructively, who always wants to redraw boundaries but doesn't quite know how to and never wants to give up any of his territory.

She talks about the girl who anchored the pair of brothers, who forced them to grow up and look beyond their own self-centredness and learn the size of the world. Yukina says that the girl is goal-focused from the way she prioritises her schoolwork, and self-reliant from the way she doesn't take advantage of the brothers' comparative wealth. The girl is oblivious too, but not because she doesn't care or because she is dumb – no, the girl is oblivious because the events that took place were out of her sphere of life experience – and if only she had had more experiences out of her comfort zone, she would understand the situation much better, and she would care so very much…

The brothers could not teach her the kind of things that would allow her to grow as a person – things like taking a chance, and throwing yourself wide open, and surrendering logic to the madness of human emotion… Despite coming across superficially as adventurous and daring people, the brothers are actually conservative, preservative, paralysed by fear – like children hiding under their blankets. The brothers failed to teach her while she succeeded in teaching them, which is why they fell for her and she didn't for them – and even though Kaoru hadn't written Tamaki into the story for fear of divulging too much, Yukina guesses that the girl too is likely to fall in love with the person who_ could_ teach her those things.

When she speaks of the younger, she speaks Kaoru's heart back to him, and everything aches.

"Would you join me?" Kaoru manages to request, humbled and affected at her unwitting assessment of him. "I cannot even describe how much I want you in my team."

She cocks her head to one side to study him. "This story hurts you. Why?"

Kaoru shakes his head. "Never mind that. Please do consider my offer; you may of course have some time to think about it."

Hacker-san and Smiley-san have taken a break out of necessity, both breathing heavily from their exertions and liable to be set off once more with the tiniest of sparks. Feeling that today's negotiations have gone as far as they should, Kaoru rises to his feet and goes over to collect his employee, ready to leave.

"Wait!" Yukina stops them, startled. "Is this it?"

"Yes," Kaoru says lightly. "That's it."

"Well, how long do I have to consider? How should I contact you? When do I start if I decide to agree? What happens if I turn you down?"

"Who _are_ you?" Smiley-san adds, still incensed.

"As long as you need, I will contact you when your mind is made up, you start immediately upon agreement, if you refuse we will have no further contact and part ways, your knowledge of my identity is contingent upon agreement." Kaoru smiles, secretly pleased at the smoothness of his delivery.

When he has one foot out the office, Smiley-san bursts out with the last question. "How will you even know when our minds are made up?!"

Hacker-san doesn't appear to have registered the word 'our' – so concerned is she that Kaoru doesn't trip over his 'neck-breaking heels' on his way out – something for which he sends a quiet word of thanks heavenward, and he swivels partly around to look Yukina straight in the eye. _Because in fact your mind is already made up._

And the extra time is just reassurance that they aren't being cheated or pressured.

He smiles again, this time at Smiley-san – who isn't showing much of a smiley face indeed – and Hacker-san shuts the door behind them.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Back at headquarters, Kaoru deliberately lets Hacker-san stew in aforementioned guilt and self-blame for at least an hour before he finally has mercy on her and tells her that he isn't upset at all. Not about anything that took place, and not about the way things developed. At any rate they achieved their objectives for going to Todai.

He wants to know about Hacker-san's violent and hypocritical objection to Smiley-san – it can't be that she detests him only for an unfortunate pick up attempt on the wrong person, can it? Hacker-san herself falls within the spectrum of grey to black hat hacker, she would freely admit that herself, and she's no stranger to criminality so why disparage and belittle Smiley-san to such an extent –

Oh.

_Oh._ Kaoru sneaks a glance at his employee. There is one category of crimes that she has expressly stated her revulsion for. _Was Smiley-san arrested for theft?_

He has enough sense to refrain from asking her to delve into Smiley-san even though it is among the top items of his list of things-to-do, but he does demand dinner from her. This results in the discovery that Hacker-san cannot cook to save her life, and Kaoru is appalled at himself for ever expecting otherwise. He points to the lovely kitchen of her Akihabara apartment and threatens to downsize their headquarters if she does not do some serious self-reflection.

Naturally and calamitously, he has to treat her to dinner again – during which he does his best to continue terrorising her with talk of pay cuts while fervently wishing that Yukina (or Smiley-san, shhh) knows how to cook. He'd also toyed with the idea of terrorising her with talk of Smiley-san in their team, but like Yukina said – long day.

After dinner, she makes it up to him by tutoring him in mathematics whenever he gets stuck. She is freakishly good at it herself though she quite frankly sucks at teaching it to someone else. The best she can do is solve the questions first – it's a piece of cake to her and she's _so_ fast – and then Kaoru has to look through her workings to understand it himself because she has no idea how to walk him through the steps. Unless he gets it, he doesn't allow himself to fill it in as his own answer, and even then he writes it down without reference to her solution. Using this method they toil through Kiyomi's two maths papers assigned for today.

At 12:14 am when the last algebraic equation is solved, Kaoru collapses onto his desk. "Enough," he wails pitifully, feeling like death. "Spare meeeee."

As these practice papers are replicas of real exams, the official time allocated to each of them is anywhere from 2 hours, 2 and a half hours, or 3 hours – and most students would need the _entirety_ of that timeframe. Kaoru has heard that Honey and Kyouya are generally at liberty to spend the remaining half an hour or forty-five minutes just daydreaming or idly counting down the seconds (Haruhi too ordinarily manages to finish with a minimum of fifteen minutes to spare), and this thought induces such despair in him.

Of Kiyomi's designated homework, there are two more untouched science papers that need to be completed – Kaoru had spent his recess and lunch on one science paper at least, or he would be in even more dire straits than he is now. It's terribly late, and anyway Hacker-san isn't fantastic at any science that isn't computer science – and high school science is composed of the three main categories of Chemistry, Biology and Physics. Hacker-san had made it abundantly clear that she only enjoys Physics, and she's so much like him in that she only does what she likes.

Despondently, Kaoru flicks though the two science papers and mourns at the sheer amount of white space. "Kiyomi-san is the devil."

Hacker-san takes her attention off her 9-screen computer. "Kaoru-san, that stuff is totally elementary, you know."

"I hate you," Kaoru informs her resentfully. "Pack up my things and get me home."

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Because this unknown driver cannot be trusted, Kaoru is dropped off at a distance and through the GPS Hacker-san is monitoring his walk home to the Hitachiin mansion to ensure his safety. _That's why I tell you we need a driver_, Kaoru wants to say to her.

The servants let him in through the front gate and later, the front door, and Kaoru enters his home fully braced in case Hikaru is waiting in ambush like an enraged sabre-toothed tiger.

It's quiet and dark, and there aren't any people visibly waiting up for him, yet somehow that doesn't help Kaoru to ease up. He hadn't ignored his brother's messages, of course not – letting Hikaru get into a frantic state is always a mistake, and Kaoru had dashed off a couple of "I'm fine, I'm studying, don't worry, see you at home" messages back.

Removing his blue school blazer and rolling his shoulders tiredly as he ascends the stairs, he detours into the main atelier on the second floor when he sees light spilling out from underneath the doors.

"Eh? Mother?" There is a curious smell of herbs in the air instead of the usual fabrics-and-art-materials smell.

"Sweetie!" Yuzuha exclaims, looking up from the sketch that she is poring over with her husband. "When did you get home? We didn't hear any car coming up the driveway!"

"Only just," Kaoru says diffidently, going to sit across from her. "What're you doing?"

"Hikaru was worried about you," Yasuhiro says. "He said that the school's water system malfunctioned today, and they couldn't find you afterwards."

"Heheh. Really?" Kaoru asks evasively, filching the drawing from his mother. "Ooooohhh!" he squeals nostalgically, "Is this for the baby?"

"Yes," his father replies sappily, fingering the pendant hanging from a chain around his neck. "It was the happiest day of my life when Yuzuha gave this to me."

She smiles back at him with such tenderness even after nineteen years of marriage that it still makes Kaoru want to look away and blush and die of envy and be at a loss. "I thought you said the happiest day of your life was when we married, darling."

"I thought," Kaoru interjects cheekily before his father can formulate a response, "that you said the happiest day of your life was when you and Mother had us, Daddy."

Yasuhiro kisses his wife, then drops one on Kaoru's forehead. "I have a lot of happy days."

Everyone chuckles. "What a cop out, Dad."

"A diplomatic answer from a diplomatic man," Yuzuha says admiringly. "Well, sweetie? What do you think of the design for the baby's pendant? Let's hear your opinions."

Kaoru scrutinises his mother's drawing of the letter 'A' decorated with beautiful, mysterious curved lines, almost like the petals of a flower or the edge of a leaf – it has a distinctively 'plant-y' sort of feel, of being immersed in foliage. "This is the design if she turns out to be a girl, right? Another one named for something leafy again, Mother?"

"Heheh," Yuzuha grins, and her sheepish laugh is uncannily like Kaoru's. For a number of generations now, their females have been given names ending with '-ha', or '葉', which means 'leaf', to reflect their venerable ikebana heritage. Hence, their females have had pendants that resemble flowers or plants for a long time – the coin-sized pendants are always created before the birth of the child, and its design is based on the meaning of the name given. It is a matter of utmost importance in their family as it is the family's first gift to the newborn child: a personalised piece from Hitachiin haute joaillerie.

Really, being a member of this family is awesome. They have many esoteric traditions, some more peculiar than others, and most are known only internally to family members despite the huge number of absurd rumours circulating about them. Kaoru's grandmother's personal favourite is the one where people think that in the event of there being no Hitachiin heiress, the family has to choose one of their sons for castration. It's untrue, of course, and unbelievably _imbecilic _not to mention nonsensical, because how then will the heir reproduce? All it proves is that their grandmother is the demon incarnate.

Kaoru's own pendant is a 'K' of swirly wisps and ethereal indefinability to capture the meaning of his name, 'fragrance' or 'perfume' – the intangibility of smell and its lingering nature. Hikaru's 'H' is surrounded by strong, straight shining lines, like the rays of light he was named for. Not even they would exchange their pendants for the other to wear, as this is an heirloom of their family and uniquely represents them alone. They have no need to take their twin-swapping so far – doing that would probably only result in some catastrophic loss of identity and blurring of lines.

Right now the pendant that once belonged to Yuzuha – a citrusy, jewel-studded, yellow-orange themed treelike 'Y' – now belongs to Yasuhiro. She chose to give it to him, and Kaoru believes his father when he said that receiving such a token from a Hitachiin meant more to him than Yuzuha's acceptance of formal marriage. It's true that Kaoru's grandparents are blissfully married, too, but their grandfather isn't in possession of Kazuha's pendant. Nobody knows where it is, and out of respect to their grandfather it's better not to pry.

"What about if it's a boy?"

"Something ending with '-ru', I suppose," Yuzuha says offhandedly. "Single kanji only, like you and Hikaru. Endless variety. Toru, Minoru, Satoru, Mitsuru, Shigeru, Mamoru… Too many to count."

"Noboru?" Yasuhiro tacks on randomly.

"Ugh!" Kaoru makes his opposition known. "What hideous names! Hitachiin names need to have finesse! Elegance!"

His parents glance at each other amusedly. "Then, Hotaru?"

Kaoru opens his mouth, closes it and presses his lips together to review the suggestion before opening it again. "I guess naming someone 'firefly' is less clunky than the others. I don't want a blockhead brother who is blockheaded because he was given a blockhead name."

They laugh in his face.

"What! Don't tell me you ran out of boys' names after Hikaru and me?!"

"We did, actually," Yuzuha says seriously. "For you and Hikaru, we couldn't even really think of boys' names and girls' names per se – we had just the one name for each of you. If you'd been girls, you would have been Hikari and Kaori. Exact same kanji."

Kaoru goggles at them. "What."

"We were really young," Yuzuha says defensively, "and this whole business of naming is harder than you'd think, my baby."

"Well, couldn't you have thought of ikebana associated girls' names for us or something?!" Kaoru yelps. "Why don't Hikaru and I have names ending with -ha?"

"Your names_ are_ associated with ikebana! Flowers have fragrance and plants need light to grow!"

Very, very flatly, Kaoru says, "You just made that up on the spot, Mother."

"I most certainly did not," she refutes indignantly.

"There, there," Yasuhiro mediates between them. "We like the names we gave you, and you like the names you received. Everything is as it should be."

As per custom in their family, Daddy knows best and Daddy's always right. Kaoru loves his name. He _is_ his name. He can't imagine being truly not-Kaoru.

"Where's the design for the back? Are you leaving it till later?" The kanji of their names is etched onto the backside such that the pendant could almost be said to be double-sided.

Yuzuha snags another sheet off the table and brandishes it at him. "It's incomplete; I've only recently started on it. It took me months to refine yours and Hikaru's."

Only the character '葉' is on it, as well as a cute little butterfly perched on it like collecting pollen – Kaoru would have thought his parents still in the process of brainstorming if it were not for the letter 'A'. Then again, that letter might have been used simply as a placeholder. "Are you going to tell us the names you have in mind, Mother, or are you superstitious?"

"I don't know," she says honestly, appealing to her husband for help. "Should I be superstitious?"

"We discussed Hikaru's and Kaoru's names with their grandparents, didn't we?" Yasuhiro muses. "I think it's fine."

"Oh, well," Yuzuha capitulates instantly, obviously eager to share, "Our options are Sachiha, Mayuha – or actually Midoriha is better, you think?, and 'Ageha'."

"Ahh, that's why there's a butterfly." Kaoru nods. 'Ageha', in katakana, means swallowtail butterfly. "With what kanji? Or are we going with kana? Wait, forget I asked that last bit – Grandmother always insists on kanji."

"Yes. We're undecided on the kanji." Yasuhiro writes them on a bit of paper in neat penmanship: Sachiha 幸葉, Mayuha 真葉.

Upon seeing the kanji for Mayuha, Kaoru vetoes it straightaway. "Agreed, Mother – Mayuha is awful. No Hitachiin should be tied to reality or forced to be true. But Sachiha is adorable, and it actually means something cool."

"Kaoru, your taste is impeccable as always," she praises. "Yes, Sachiha would mean 'luck leaf', and I was intending to sketch a four leaf clover design for it." She crosses out 'Mayuha'. "Your grandmother was equally horrified at this."

Yasuhiro finishes writing the two variations for Midoriha: 緑葉 and 翠葉, and three for Ageha: 揚葉, 朱葉 and 紅葉.

"Both kanji of Midoriha essentially mean green, don't they? I prefer the second one, it has the meaning of emerald or jade leaf instead of just plain green. The first variation of Ageha doesn't make sense – lift? Raise? Lift leaf…? But the second and third ones mean red, right? Scarlet?"

Yasuhiro smiles fondly. "Yes, my dear child. Well done."

"And if it's green leaf versus red leaf," Kaoru continues, leaning forward to carefully take hold of a portion of his mother's fiery hair, "we're a family of redheads. We should be blazing, and passionate, and scandalous. I'd always pick scarlet, Mother." His point made, he settles back and twirls a lock of his hair playfully.

"My, you are your grandmother's heir. She also narrowed it down to Sachiha and Ageha." Yuzuha takes the pen. "You know, sweetie, 'Ageha' can also be written like this." She scribbles the character 鳳.

Kaoru fights a flinch. "If that wasn't Kyouya-senpai's surname, I'd be all for it, Mother."

She laughs cheerfully, reaching for a pot of… herbal brew? to replenish her teacup. "Aw, sadly, yes. It looks amazing, though. See?"

常陸院 鳳.

Glazed, gutted and speechless, Kaoru stares at it. It reads as Hitachiin-Ootori to him rather than Hitachiin Ageha. The universe is conspiring against him.

"So regal, right? Such a powerful name! I wouldn't mind a daughter as capable as Kyouya-kun. He brought this for me today, you know – " she pours the hot liquid out; it has a strong but not unpleasant scent – "it's from Yoshio-san. Apparently it's wonderful for pregnant women and their family monitors its specialised production in small, controlled quantities only."

"How – how considerate," Kaoru stutters in bewilderment. "U-Um, Kyouya-senpai dropped by?"

His mother looks at him strangely. "He's still here, sweetie."

"Eeh?!" Kaoru squeaks, too astonished to regulate his voice. Hastily bringing it down from its piercing shrill, he seeks confirmation. "Kyouya-senpai's here?"

"Mm hmm. They're with Hikaru."

_They. Oh god. _The sleepover hasn't ended.

"I should – I should go upstairs now," Kaoru babbles, seizing his bag while scampering out. "Goodnight!"

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Too preoccupied with racing to his room, Kaoru hurtles past the lighted study on the third level before his mind catches up, causing him to grind to a halt comically and backtrack rapidly.

Framed in the archway and out of breath from the ridiculous size of their mansion, Kaoru takes in the tableau in front of him: a small blond figure with a pink rabbit cuddled against another blond and a tall brunet on a long sofa – all three appear to be fast asleep. On the other side of the brunet is a redhead leaning spinelessly into him, messy soft spill of bright hair covering the shoulder on which he is resting. Across from them at the coffee table, one black-haired bespectacled head is bowed over revision notes.

"Ah," Kyouya says upon sighting him.

The redhead stirs at once, not as asleep as Kaoru had thought. He leaps up, mobile phone clenched in a hand. "Kaoru! You're home at last! Where have you been?! What time is it now?!"

"Almost one." Kyouya gestures with one hand for Hikaru to lower his voice.

Hikaru obliges. "Where _were_ you?" he whispers fiercely.

"S-Studying." Kaoru can barely stand to look at his brother – there is a painful lump in his throat from the image of them all waiting for him. He is so deeply moved. _Why are they doing this?_

Hikaru gawks at him. "Then why didn't you just come home and study with us?!"

"I didn't know everyone – " Honey twitches, and turns around in his sleep – "was here!" Kaoru finishes mutedly.

Mori cracks an eye open. He blinks away the remnants of sleep and gently shakes Tamaki awake before getting up to carry his cousin like his cousin is a feather instead of 145 cm of pure solid muscle. Shifting most of Honey's weight to one arm, Mori takes the hand of a very dazed Tamaki to lead him away to the bedroom.

Hikaru shows every sign of interrogating Kaoru further until he scans Kaoru from top-to-toe – still clad in school uniform. _Thank god I changed back instead of coming home as a girl._ With an exasperated harrumph, he says, "Go and bathe."

When Kaoru dumbly remains there, unmoving, his twin repeats, "Go on? It's really late."

Obeying wordlessly, Kaoru wanders off down the corridor after his seniors.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

After his bath, he comes out to a darkened bedroom.

Determined that he should try to do everything that Kiyomi had set for him, he fetches his schoolbag from where he'd left it and slips out unnoticed by the occupants of the bed. He'd counted five lumps under the blankets, so he should be all right to continue his work alone.

Padding softly to the nearest study, he is flabbergasted and slightly traumatised to find Kyouya there. There were five lumps! Five!

"Oh, good." The final year student begins to gather up his notes and stationery. "I was just about done for tonight."

After arranging his things properly, Kyouya circles around the table and comes to where Kaoru is. "Let's – "

He pauses, perplexed at the bag. "Were you going to study more?" he questions, a tinge of something mystified in his tone.

Kaoru unfreezes himself. "U-Uh, I guess?"

Kyouya regards him with a searching, even gaze. "Is there something I should know?"

"What? No!"

Damn his seniors' prescience. What is up with him and Mori? Is Kaoru so very odd?

"You're hiding something from me," he sighs.

"Nothing!" Kaoru contradicts him vehemently. "I just thought I should do more revision! Is it weird that I'm studying when exams are next week? Do I look like the sort who only knows how to play and not work? That's really insulting, you know."

A moment passes.

"Fine," Kyouya says, heading back to where he had been seated. "Let's start."

"W-What?" Kaoru snatches one of his wrists to stop him. "No, no you don't have to, senpai. Seriously, um – you need your rest! You've got so many responsibilities, and January isn't that far away!"

"I have a meeting that I need to prepare for anyway."

"No, really, just – "

"You wouldn't need me for every question, would you?"

"No I don't think – listen, I can – "

"We should aim to sleep before three nonetheless."

"Liar!" Kaoru cries, the accusation erupting out of him.

Kyouya stares.

"If – If Kyouya-senpai had a meeting, you would already have prepared yourself for it," Kaoru mumbles contritely, regretting his outburst.

"Not," Kyouya says, "if the meeting is in the far future."

"Is it in the far future?" Kaoru doesn't know where he found the gall to ask. "If it's not, Kyouya-senpai is definitely prepared. If it is, Kyouya-senpai should go to sleep."

"It depends on which meeting you are referring to. I have many meetings," Kyouya says noncommittally.

"Which specific meeting was senpai talking about?" Kaoru holds steady. "When is it?"

Kyouya presses his lips together in displeasure. "And I suppose you have the right to call me a liar because you haven't lied at all today, have you?"

It is at the tip of Kaoru's tongue, the words: _I haven't! _

And that in itself wouldn't be a lie, because everything he'd said he'd done today, he has in fact done. Studying, not knowing they were here, etc.

… Wait. _Shit. _He denied hiding something from Kyouya when he actually is.

"The meeting is this Thursday, isn't it?" Kaoru forges on suicidally. "Is it the one where you and Tono are going to speak to representatives from France's top hospitals to negotiate a contract for rolling out the Slez medicine?"

"Yes, and as you can see," Kyouya tells him tersely, "the importance of this meeting is such that no amount of preparation can be said to be enough. Am I expected to be blasé about it? A certain amount of butterflies in the stomach is necessary for any big project – if a person doesn't have it, that person should be going straight home to summon the degree of pressure and nervousness that will give rise to the crucial adrenaline and heightened awareness that is indispensable for success. Is it weird that I am concerned about my performance this Thursday? Does being competent mean I have to pretend to be dead and unresponsive? That's really insulting – " he stresses his words by compelling Kaoru to meet his eyes, " – you know."

The thoughts crammed in Kaoru's head are suffocating him. He is ashamed of always burdening his senior with his own inaptitude at schoolwork, embarrassed at his inability to finish a workload that is child's play to all of his friends, envious of how Haruhi never needs help from any of their seniors, worried for his seniors' health and fortunes especially those two in their final year, petrified of anyone finding out his secret foolish feelings, touched that they are here, that they waited for him, touched that Hikaru cared more for him than about getting the answers he wants, amazed that Kyouya is here, accompanying him, listening to him, when there is a world out there to conquer.

Kaoru is awed by their perfection.

He empathises so much with his senior's anxiousness to do well, to show that he is a clincher of deals instead of a deal-breaker in a series of contracts that his brothers have already secured. He is unreasonably elated that his senior had not seen the need to fudge it in front of him or continue his misdirection when unequivocally asked about the issue, and – and there are terrible, _terrible_ butterflies in his own stomach.

These butterflies make him want to do idiotic things like move closer to Kyouya, tell him he's going to be extraordinary, and kiss him.

_Oh god._ He is so incredibly, utterly, horribly in trouble.

But also, apart from the reckless impulses of his body, he actually cannot do anything concrete to help Kyouya. It is paltry and sickening that his feelings are constantly only able to manifest themselves through inappropriate and futile wishes, and he thinks that this is so because he is useless in practical terms. He is not the sort of person with the courage to go to the head of a megacorporation to demand explanations, nor is he able to be candid with an opponent and tell them to stay away if they are only in the market for a daughter, nor is he possessed of the willpower and confidence to go to a powerful man to extract the truth and flay him for betraying his son. He is not Tamaki, who can and will be at the meeting, and can and will make a difference.

The sort of person that Kaoru is, even though he would like to be able to move mountains, is to be the one who lingers behind to dispense kisses and hugs and comforting words.

He balls his free hand into a fist.

For now that will have to be enough.

Promptly dropping his bag on the ground, he tugs on the wrist that he hadn't let go of and marches out purposefully.

"Where – " Kyouya is pulled along, too composed to stumble but not quite keeping pace. "Where are you going?"

"To sleep," Kaoru says, brief and to the point, doggedly plodding towards their bedroom. When he feels a build-up of resistance from Kyouya, he stops voluntarily, because he has no strength to fight any club member head-on. "Let's go to sleep, Kyouya-senpai."

Despite the peril to himself, he moves closer to his senior, and adds, "You were right. We should be done for tonight. We _are _done for tonight. Let's go, please, senpai?"

And he takes off again with Kyouya in tow.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Kyouya lets him, and that's why they are currently in bed with the rest. Kaoru labours under no delusions that he could have prevailed if his senior hadn't obliged.

The misleading lump had turned out to be Kyouya's extra blankets, folded up and obscured under Tamaki's duvet.

Lying on his side, Kaoru tries not to brood any further as it does him no favours. Tamaki's hair is fascinating and gorgeous, so he inspects the lovely blond tresses and their natural waviness and wonders whether Tamaki will react if he plucks out a strand.

It doesn't manage to fully distract him from Kyouya's presence at his back, yet somehow when a pair of ice-cold legs twines around his own, he spasms in shock and audibly goes, "Eep!"

Kyouya is laughing so hard, albeit silently, that Kaoru can feel the tremors through the mattress.

"Kyouya-senpai!" he hisses, feeling a shiver rack his body just from the unimaginable frostiness of those cruel, cruel limbs. _Who the hell has legs like that?!_ "Are you even warm-blooded?!"

"I'm cold," Kyouya says brazenly. "I had my bath too early, while you just had yours."

Kaoru props himself up on his elbows, gaping in disbelief.

"There really is a significant difference between sleeping in the middle and sleeping at the edge," Kyouya ruminates. "If only we could turn on the electric blanket."

"Why doesn't senpai use Tono or Mori-senpai as your heater instead?!" Kaoru complains. "They're the ones who say that the electric blanket makes them too hot! I'm all too happy to switch places if you want! And if you'd just gone to sleep earlier you wouldn't have gotten so cold!"

Kyouya allows him to finish his tirade. "And have Tamaki kick me? No thank you."

"Mori-senpai produces more heat than I do and he's easily accessible on the other side! Go squeeze in with him!"

With a tired yawn, Kyouya wriggles himself even more snugly under the covers. "But I can't bully Mori-senpai."

Kaoru splutters in outrage.

Kyouya smirks in self-satisfaction. "Do you know your protests ring hollow when you haven't moved away at all?" When Kaoru automatically fidgets, he immediately receives a, "Don't you dare."

Glowering heartily at his too-smug senior, Kaoru adjusts himself so that he can lean over Kyouya in preferably a menacing manner. "You know, Kyouya-senpai… in some other life I bet I am your Kaoru-senpai, and I'm sure I enjoy making your life very difficult."

A short exhalation of scoffing laughter emanates from beneath the layers. "Well then," the voice says darkly, "there's no reason for me to hold back, is there?"

Grinning uncontrollably, Kaoru resettles himself for the sleep that he knows will not come. He extends his legs out for Kyouya to wrap around and leech the warmth he needs.

This person makes him smile so much and so often, with such mastery and such effortlessness. Kaoru is not in the habit of lying to himself even though he has been told that he lies to other people rather frequently. As the minutes tick by, he feels something settle into his bones with an inescapable finality – a weight, a certainty – gradually and delicately immersing itself into his being. It is changing him. He will never be free of it.

He does not struggle against it now, as he hadn't struggled against it previously. It is not the nature of a Hitachiin to shut the door on this old friend or to deny its existence; it is not for a Hitachiin to argue with it, or misinterpret it, or repudiate it.

A Hitachiin is only to surrender to it, and embrace it.

It came to him, and it is his. It may never be reciprocated, and to be honest it probably shouldn't be.

The first slivers of dawn light shine through a miniscule gap in the thick velvet curtains. Kaoru keeps his eyes closed and body relaxed when Mori gets up for his morning training, and Hikaru and Honey go with him – then Tamaki soon after. When it's about time for him to prepare for school, he reaches out gently, so gently, and draws down Kyouya's blankets by a couple of inches. He lets himself look because he wants to, he lets himself mouth the words, "You're going to be extraordinary," because he wants to, and he just barely skims those cheekbones with his lips because he wants to.

He lets himself admit that _he wants to_.

For himself, at least, he has cast off his doubt and fear and excuses. This is what he feels, and he accepts it. He still doesn't accept anyone else knowing about it, and anything beyond this internal acknowledgement is still impossible.

Seconds before his alarm is set to blare, Kaoru flicks it off and untangles himself from Kyouya with an acute sense of loss. His legs are his own again, their heat slowly regained through the night – but his heart is no longer his.

He takes a deep breath past the emptiness in his chest, and stands to face another day.

.

* * *

><p>.<p>

Notes

(a) Here are the kanji of the relevant names:

**Hacker-san **– Iseya Kanon (伊勢谷 · 花音). Her name means 'the sound of flowers'. As a tidbit, Yuzuha mentions up there that Kaoru was named for the fragrance of flowers, and no, for the purposes of in-fic consistency, she didn't just make that up on the spot. Or, what Kaoru calls her: ハッカーさん

**Smiley-san** – Igarashi Masanori (五十嵐 · 正則), previously Mitsuya (三津谷). His surname Igarashi means 'fifty storms', and his name means 'model of justice', hence Hacker-san's insult. Hence also his explosive introduction, I suppose. Or, what Kaoru calls him: スマイリーさん

**Yukina Yumeji** (née Mitsuya 三津谷): 雪名 · 夢二 As stated up there, she has only one brother, an older brother named Ryouta, who is Smiley-san's father. When she is addressed as junkyōju, it means Associate Professor (准教授).

(b) References to manga:

Haruhi is the sort of person with the courage to go to the head of a megacorporation to demand explanations: Chapter 75, page 20

Hikaru is the sort of person who is able to be candid with an opponent and tell them to stay away if they are only in the market for a daughter: Chapter 59, pages 32-35

Kyouya is the sort of person possessed of the willpower and confidence to go to a powerful man to extract the truth and flay him for betraying his son: Chapter 78, pages 22-29, especially 28-29. Kyouya further demonstrates his patience and acuity at being able to first extract the whole truth before delivering judgement.

Kaoru and his kisses/hugs: Chapter 52, page 25; Chapter 53, page 7 + others elsewhere

(c) I hope the in-fic sequence relating to Ageha's name was explained in a way that you could understand. I was able to do that – explore the kanji – because we are actually _not_ provided with Ageha's name in canon. Ageha is mentioned only in the Volume 18 extras, and only using hiragana: あげは. However, the hiragana usage is probably to reflect the way the twins drag her name out when calling her, like so: 'Aaaa-ge-ha-chan!'

The name Ageha is also stated to be 仮, which means 'assumed name/informal'. I guess for English speakers it does not make much of a difference, but clearly you see how it is important for the Japanese.

Names in kana, for example, Haruhi's name (ハルヒ), are noticeably simpler and do not have meanings attached to them. It is literally composed of syllables – Haruhi's name is ha + ru + hi. This may be important to some parents because they might not want to give a meaning that their daughters then have to live up to. On the flip side, some parents find it critical to give the child a name with a great meaning, hoping that it will augur well for the child. Hatori Bisco herself mentioned that she thought it fitting for Haruhi to have a name in kana after the – and I quote – "bombastic" names of the guys. (Esp. because they have very complex and uncommon surnames as well)

I am almost 100% certain that Ageha will have a proper name in kanji, because the rest of her family has that precedent. Also, the upper classes are more likely to choose names in kanji for the added sophistication as well. If you have ever seen the raws of the Ouran manga, you will swiftly realise that just about every single character has got names in kanji, because just about every single character in Ouran comes from a powerful rich upper class family.

(d) You may have noticed that I have an interest in names. (Understatement alert)

Part of why I am obsessed with names is because I subscribe to the philosophy that what we call a thing or person is inherent important and inherently says something about the thing or person. The name defines the thing/person. Many cultures regard this as vital, hence the endless agonising over the bestowal of names to newborn children.

So, our topic for this chapter is – you may have guessed it from the Hitachiin parents – **NAMES**!

The following are all canon, by the way. Their actual names in the manga.

**Host club**

We have established that Haruhi's name is made up of syllabary.

Kaoru's name means 'fragrance': 馨

Hikaru's name means 'light': 光

Kyouya's name is composed of two kanji: 鏡 (mirror/glass) and 夜 (night)

Tamaki's name means 'ring': 環

Mitsukuni's name is composed of two kanji: 光 (light) and 邦 (clan/country)

Takashi's name means 'reverence': 崇

**Relatives**

Hitachiin:

Kazuha: 和葉 – harmony/peace leaf

Yuzuha: 柚葉 – citrus fruit leaf

.

Ootori:

Yoshio: 敬雄 – respected/venerated/esteemed male (haha you can see that Yoshio's name is serious business. I mean, honestly. It is so macho! The kanji is just pulsating with masculinity, and there is this absolute – almost forceful – demand for respect)

In fact, Yoshio's name reflects his function very well (Ugh, what an Ootori trait – form following function). He is this father figure, you know – _very_ patriarchal – wielding great power and exercising absolute authority over all of the people in his life. He regards his family as belonging to him, as _his_, and he controls them. Yoshio honestly believes he has the_ right_ to control them. The extent of his power over his family is such that he is a spectre hanging over their lives and informing many of their decisions even when he is not directly present – his word is law, and god help you if you fall foul of it. He is demanding, hard, strong, unyielding, and he has this enormous sense of entitlement arising out of his position as head of the family.

He is one of those parents who will always have difficulty seeing his children as separate from himself, as _individuals_ with their _own lives_, and he expects them to obey him until his death regardless of the fact that they are growing into adults.

Actually, in truth, he is not so very different from Suou Shizue at all. He exerts so much pressure on his children that he, like Shizue, will always run the risk of having the children throw their hands in the air and decide to rebel by _taking him down_. The two children most likely to do this are Yuuichi and Kyouya.

**Yuuichi**, because he is the eldest and has probably taken the most crap from his father. At some stage it must be exhausting to keep proving yourself over and over and over to one man. The same man who should have loved him and accepted him rather than dangle the inheritance over his head like a carrot and simultaneously constantly beat him with the stick of the other available and competent heirs. When children get to the point where they feel like nothing is ever going to be enough for this parent, _they stop playing the game entirely_. That's dangerous. It was what Yuzuru did to Shizue – he felt that nothing could please her, and therefore invented his own game to topple her regime. In addition, such children tend to feel very, _very_ hard done by, which means that they will dethrone their parents in the most cruel way possible to avenge themselves and the pain they suffered. It will almost inevitably be a smackdown of epic proportions.

This excerpt from the manga, for example, perfectly captures what Yuzuru did: "Your father left your grandmother completely alone and helpless, then he fired her in front of everyone. Your father completely outmaneuvered his own mother!" (From Kousaka to Tamaki, Chapter 78, page 8, underlining mine). Publicly humiliating Shizue was not necessary – it was done to appease the rage that Yuzuru felt towards his own mother, rage that had been building up and simmering away for years and years.

**Kyouya**, because Kyouya is the youngest and is crushed under a different type of pressure. Everything that he does will never feel enough because _it has been done before_. When he ranks the highest in his class, it is not something to be celebrated – it is a mere meeting of standards that have been already been established. The type of pain that we are talking about here runs along the lines of: when Yuuichi first came in top of his class, Yoshio probably nodded and perhaps even smiled a little. But by Kyouya's time, Yoshio has become _desensitized_ to the extraordinary achievements of his children, such that all Kyouya will get is probably a quick glance at the exam paper and a nod of satisfaction. Full stop. This is a very hurtful reaction for a child to receive from the parent. It's lacklustre, and it feels like neglect.

Also, Yoshio actively fans the flames of Kyouya's ambition. He sparks it, and he keeps it alive. See: Chapter 25, page 29 – "I advocate meritocracy. If he [Kyouya] has the talent, well… I don't mind naming my third son heir to the family business." He says it in front of Kyouya, though it is said as an answer to another parent. Do you see that he maintains Kyouya in a perpetual state of non-fulfillment, keeping him dissatisfied and making him crave more? He gives him just enough to make him _hope_, and hope can be a deadly weapon. What do you know about desire, and what do you think suppression and delay does to the strength of desire? Well, let Kaoru answer this for you, because he is a Hitachiin and Hitachiins know how to drive other people insane with want – deliberately putting something just out of reach is tantamount to goading a person, and it has the same effect of pushing the person closer and closer to losing his or her self-control. It makes the person _snap_. This is very dangerous, because emotion then overrides rationality and causes people to become impulsive, reckless, coercive and aggressive in a way that they most likely would not normally be.

All of this is compounded by the several terrible facts, chief among which is that: Yuuichi and Kyouya have been raised by Yoshio to show no mercy, and hence it is very likely that _they will show none to him as well_. (From Juvenal's Satires, _Satire XIV: Avarice is not a Family Virtue_ – The greatest danger to the morals of children comes from the vices of their parents. People should restrain themselves from vice for the sake of their children. It is unjust for a father to criticize and punish a son who takes after himself. The greedy son will surpass his father as much as Achilles did Peleus. Instilling avarice is the same as teaching a child every form of crime. A son whom you have taught to have no mercy will have no mercy on you either.)

The second terrible fact is that Yoshio also raised the two of them to be cunning, underhanded, manipulative, and prone to making decisions that will allow them to win at all costs. Actually, he raised all of his children that way, but the reason why I use "the two of them" is because these ruthless business ideologies have particular effect on these two. This is because of their natural personalities. Humans are all a combination of nature and nurture – and Yuuichi's and Kyouya's natures are such that they were already inclined towards power-play, competitiveness, and immense egoism (the habit of valuing everything only by reference to one's personal interest).

Fuyumi and Akito are not handicapped with these inborn inclinations. My characterisation of Fuyumi is, using the good ol' Hogwarts analogies, that she is a person with a Hufflepuff demeanour but a Slytherin core. In this sense, while she does have a side to her that is quite sly, her default mode is someone who is kind, cheerful, hardworking, dutiful and generally pleasant and lovely to be around. It is necessary to piss her off or, if you can actually manage it, to bully any of her younger siblings to draw out the true blue Ootori that she is – and then you will realise too late that she is a woman you never want to trifle with. Yuuichi, you see, is grounded and confident – he gives off the impression of cold, calculating detachment that Yoshio and Kyouya have in different degrees, although Fuyumi and Akito almost entirely lack it. In fact, I personally believe that Fuyumi is capable of more of that cold calculating thing than Akito. Because, you know, when Yoshio scolds her, she drops her head a little like, "Aww, Daddy's angry," (Chapter 23, page 4) but you notice she flagrantly disobeys his instructions anyway – she happily announces to Kyouya that Yoshio is overseas so she can openly be at the house (Chapter 81, page 41). She also really takes pleasure in sticking her nose in Kyouya's business and teasing him, and she can mess up his room and his things at will… Assuming that she isn't one of those people who play favouritism, she almost certainly does this to Akito as well. What I am saying is: Fuyumi is genuinely gracious and wonderful, but she has also developed _a lifetime's worth_ of _thick armour _against the scary ways of Ootori men, you know?

Building on that, Akito is her reverse – he tries to appear Slytherin so that he will fit into the family culture, but really he has the heart of a Hufflepuff. He's hardworking, loyal as hell, eager to please his father and older siblings, and I think that if push comes to shove, he still won't double cross his family or sell them out. His own family environment is very bad for his health and wellbeing. I have never liked genuinely mean and/or vicious Akito because I think his behaviour stems from insecurity rather than any ingrained antagonism towards his little brother. Also, I admit that I don't think Akito is capable of true viciousness, although I think Yuuichi is. In the Barcelona extra chapter, for example, Akito was so clueless and cute and an obedient son – he's trying his best, he really really is, but there is a sneaking suspicion within him that he isn't good enough, or that he can't match his brothers. That's why he always reacts with annoyance at Kyouya's arrogance, and why he is prickly and unapproachable like a porcupine. He is the worst of his siblings at being sociable (again talking about the Barcelona chapter, he was really,_ really_ uncomfortable and stiff when, to his knowledge, he was meeting a fiancée and thus needed to be at his best), and he suffers a lot of the classic middle child syndrome – being sandwiched between an over-achieving, responsible elder sibling and an indulged youngest child, and seemingly doomed to failure, angst and being misunderstood. To me, Akito is probably the squishiest Ootori of the lot, and he's kind of marshmallowy inside and just _needs more love_.

Oh, I must confess that I have thought of the Ootori family in obscene depth for 1-7th, and that is why I have a grounded characterization of them (and all the other characters) across all of my stories if you happen to read the rest as well. Their family dynamics are fascinating, and as Kaoru gets to know all of them better, I hope that your love for them will increase as well!

Anyway, the third terrible fact is that Yoshio actually views his sons as competition, and that means he was never able to form truly meaningful relationships with them from the start. Yes, I do mean that he views them as _his own competition_, not just as competitors against their siblings.

I will explain.

Yoshio subscribes to very antiquated concepts of gender. He believes that men and women have their functions and should fulfill their roles accordingly. He has spent his life in the position of alpha male, the guy who needs to protect his territory and his family and the guy who is undisputedly the leader of the pack. What this means is that his behaviour very closely resembles that of the basic male in the animal kingdom – for many species of animals, males have their own clearly demarcated territory and they do not interact with other males except to fight for food and mates. If they meet another male, they challenge each other and they fight. Lots of us humans know that, where certain species of pets are concerned, it is a bad idea to put two males together because again they just end up fighting, sometimes to the death.

As such, Yoshio's core beliefs are really based on animal kingdom behaviour, and so he naturally treats all other males as competition. Although his sons are members of his pack, they will one day take his place, i.e. his power will diminish and pass on to them. His human intellect understands this, but his fundamental beliefs do not like this. Yoshio is a control freak. He is a lot harsher on his sons than his daughter, and he would have been an incredibly domineering husband. Yet, because he does regard himself as the protector of his family, if he liked his wife at all then he will almost definitely have developed a deep-rooted sense of chivalry towards her. That is to say, if he didn't like her then he would just take a completely clinical and result-oriented view to their marital relationship – the production of heirs. But if he so much as felt warmly towards her, if her personality was the sort that gelled with his and managed to induce those feelings of protection and possession, he would take on his duties as a husband with the sort of extreme fanaticism that only an Ootori is capable of. Additionally, he would feel that he owes a strong duty to his daughter to make sure that she marries well and is provided for, because that is the way his mind works.

The end result is this: he expects his sons to be self-sufficient, and he expects them to weather whatever storms come their way. They are supposed to "man up" and not just complain about whatever shit they have to deal with, because Yoshio himself handled his own problems in his life. However, he does _not_ expect the same of his daughter, nor did he expect it of his wife, which means that if they voice their concerns or worries or fears, _he actually listens_. This is absolutely critical. Yes, it is terribly sexist that he thinks that men can solve their own problems while women need to bring their problems to the nearest man for that man to solve it for them. What it also means, though, is that he holds himself responsible for Fuyumi's (and Okiko's) problems. Therefore, when they speak to him, he listens. Not about things like business and finance and whatever, since he doesn't even expect them to be involved with those matters. I am talking about all of the other things that life is composed of. In order to sway their father, Yuuichi, Akito and Kyouya need to present strong arguments to sway him through intellect. Fuyumi, on the other hand, can sway him through emotion – the things that she needs, wants, feels.

Therefore, the fact that Yoshio could not protect his wife, that he failed to protect his woman, actually strikes at the heart of his self-identity and his masculinity.

The other consequence of holding such beliefs is that Yoshio has very few friends. The men in his life are either colleagues or enemies. It's very rigid. He has no need to associate with women as they would not usually be in contact except at parties where he will either let his wife lead the social interaction with them, or (after she died) he will be mingling around with too many people to establish any solid friendship anyway. Yoshio has his own wife, and again if he so much as liked her, he would not betray her. He is a guy with highly developed 'us-and-them' sensibilities (something that Kyouya clearly shares) – that is how he knows who he has to protect and who he owes familial duties to – and so he will not permit himself to hurt his wife (us) for the sake of someone else (them). This concept is known as uchi-soto (内外), which literally means 'inside-outside', and yes the Japanese actually have a word for it and it is a central concept of their culture. You can see that it is very prominent in Kyouya as well – Kyouya doesn't much give a damn about other people (his out-group), but try hurting a club member (his in-group) and he will make you wish you'd never been born.

Thus, it is interesting that the only person left on earth who is familiar enough with Yoshio to address him by name is Yuzuha. After careful consideration, I determined that Yuzuha is a great friend for him and she is quite possibly the only one who ticks the necessary boxes to be considered Ootori Yoshio's friend. This is because Yuzuha registers as a female (non-threat), who is fully versed in business and in complete control of her finance and affairs (an equal), in a vastly different industry from him (not a competitor), and is known to be devoted to her spouse (not a romantic risk). Actually, from Yoshio's point of view, Yuzuha is the man in her relationship. Once more you see his fixed gender beliefs and that inflexibility coming to the fore – Yoshio doesn't see her as _the woman_ who _is the ascendant_ in her marriage. Precisely because she is the more powerful half, he thinks of her as the man and Yasuhiro as the woman in the Hitachiin relationship. He thinks of power as a male trait – he equates power with masculinity. So powerful women invariably feel manly to him; Suou Shizue is powerful and manly, instead of powerful and _womanly_, a woman.

This makes him an extremely negative influence around feminine energies. Yoshio doesn't really _get it_. (Fuyumi does, and Fuyumi understands both her father and flexibility, that's why she holds up perfectly under the pressure of his iron fist.) He has this structured worldview that incorporates only traditional gender roles, and when Kaoru took the blame for Kyouya, he'd already subconsciously mentally classified Kaoru as being unsuited for power.

Of course Tachibana was always right – the Ootori family as a whole is catastrophic for those with softer core energies. Note that I don't mean 'feminine energies' here (feminine =/= soft, they are not interchangeable), as it is equally terrible for someone like Akito, who has an undisputedly male energy but who simply wasn't made to withstand such an unrelenting, testosterone-fuelled, steely atmosphere. Fuyumi has a feminine core energy, and she thrives because she is hardy.

Oh, wow, I cannot wait to get to the stage where Kaoru and Yoshio are interacting regularly. It's going to be a blast!

Yuuichi: 悠一 – the first kanji means permanence, and the second kanji, 'ichi' is often given to eldest sons and it really just means oldest son

Fuyumi: 芙裕美 (Shido 矢道) – the first kanji is lotus, the second kanji is abundant/affluent/opulent, and the third kanji is beauty

Akito: 秋人 – the first kanji is autumn, the second kanji is person.

The Ootori children are all rather oddly named. You would think for such a fanatic father as Yoshio, he would insist on naming his children something not only deep and meaningful, but set a terrible benchmark that they will have to live up to for the rest of their lives. Instead, they received cute names. Very puzzling.

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Haninozuka:

Yorihisa: 頼久 – the first kanji means trust, and the second kanji means 'for a long time'

Yasuchika: 靖睦 – the first kanji means peaceful, and the second means friendly/harmonious. Oh my god, the irony.

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Morinozuka:

Akira: 彰 – clear. As in the meaning of 'plain' or 'obvious'. See why I wanted to establish the theme of "what you see is what you get" for the Morinozuka family? So his wife is 'quiet' and he is 'clear'. So pleasing in its straightforwardness.

Satoshi: 悟 – I LOVE Satoshi's name. It means discernment/understanding/_enlightenment_, and it is related to the Zen Buddhist concept of being spiritually awakened and having attained higher perception. Thankfully the new Hitachiin kid is not male, because then I would have wanted him to be a 'Satoru', same kanji. Both Yasuchika and Satoshi's names are so hilariously ironic. It is highly debatable as to how much discernment Satoshi has.

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Suou:

Shizue: 静江 – first kanji quiet, second kanji river. I think it is beautifully named, as it conveys the meaning of longevity. Long-lasting, quiet, powerful like a river – much like the reign of the woman herself.

Yuzuru: 譲 – his name means deference. Oh, Shizue. HAHAHAHAHA. If she named him, she truly is a master. If her husband named him, clearly neither of them intended to have a son who would have his own mind.

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Fujioka:

Ryoji: 涼二 (Ranka 蘭花) – first kanji means nice and cool/refreshing, and second kanji means 'two'. Yes, just the number two.

Kotoko: 琴子 – the first kanji is a musical instrument, the harp, and the second literally means 'child', and is very common in feminine Japanese names.

(d) The reason why Kaoru shows anxiety for Kyouya about the impending month of January is because January is the month of make-or-break for a lot of Japanese students. It is their month of hell and agony to cap off their previous months of studying hell and agony. It is the month of the Center Test, which is the standardized examinations that just about every Japanese student must take to qualify for university. The pressure is immense and it is the main cause for all the cram schools (juku) out there.

As January (in the fic) gets closer, I will explain more and more about the madness that is Center Test. For now, just believe me when I say that it is Serious Business. Also, just note that Kyouya is willingly engulfed in the double madness of SAT as well as Center. Crazy boy.

(e) I just wanted to say, if there is anything in the fic you need clarification for, please feel very free to leave a review or if you are shy you can send a private message. I am very happy to clear things up or explain more concepts, or explain in more detail. In fact, I occasionally go back and update my notes for the previous chapters to make them more complete.

What usually happens after you ask a question is that in a couple of days' time, I will add a note to the bottom of the chapter in question. However if you want it to be answered only through private message, I can do that – and if you don't want me to specifically direct my answer to you in the note in the fic, I can do that too.


	29. Chapter 7B incomplete

**CHAPTER SEVEN**

**Corporate World OMG!**

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To the best of his ability, Kaoru refrains from 'acting weird' for the following days.

Such a feat is quite simple when he has nothing scheduled, because it almost wholly consists of staying with his friends at nearly all hours of the day and doing what they want to do. Kaoru has always been quite comfortable with letting other people take the lead, and it's not as if he has some major objection to spending time with them. In fact, given the choice he would spend his entire life with them very willingly. It's only really when he has private activities that it becomes inconvenient since they like to keep an eye on him. When he thinks about it, it's almost insulting – they can go off to do their own secret things, but if he so much as tries to do the same, they immediately want to sit him down for an interrogation.

Kaoru is quite certain that it is because Haruhi isn't here. It used to be that when it was just the six of them, they would mind their own business. They were friends and clubmates, of course, but they weren't close and they didn't spend their waking hours glued to each other. Then Haruhi came along, and they spent more and more _and more_ time together – except that they also spent that time generally harassing and bothering Haruhi, focusing all the group's attention on her. Kaoru would never ever wish to return to that time before the club and before Haruhi, but he feels a bit sorry now towards her – they must have made things extremely troublesome for her, and it is a mark of how competent and level-headed she is that she has taken it all in stride.

He's the baby of the group now, so they've all decided to baby him or something. Why else would they be so insistent on watching out for him and knowing what he's doing? They think he can't take care of himself, and it makes him cringe with his own uselessness. He needs to do more; the inactivity is driving him insane. His mother would never forbid them from pursuing creative endeavours, but she would and has banned them temporarily from the Hitachiin offices and workshops because of their exams. They are high school students, after all.

Remaining within their sight appears to soothe the minds of all those around him, although Kaoru himself is disappointed at his apparent inability to be natural, and also he hates the way he keeps making everyone else worry. His Mori-senpai has been periodically asking him if he is all right, and to be honest Kaoru is feeling less and less all right with each question. He wants to ask the wise senior about what exactly is the problem, except he is too afraid to voice it because then he may end up _creating_ a problem.

No. Better to err on the side of caution.

If only Haruhi could be here with them right now. If only she could occupy everybody's attention as effortlessly as she always does, and then Kaoru could get back on his feet in no time at all. He did it once before, he can do it again.

Amidst the noise of the fancy school cafeteria of the high school building, Kaoru looks down at his food and bites back a sigh. The plate is practically untouched, and he doesn't want anyone to notice – skilfully, he messes up the food by cutting it up into smaller pieces and shifts them around, scattering them and creating gaps to reveal the expensive bone china underneath. Hikaru and Renge, bless them, are distracting the crowd of girls at their table with amazing efficiency, and Kaoru has begun to try to imitate Honey in the art of capturing people with conversation while simultaneously accomplishing another more vital task. Everyone has been talking non-stop about the major overhaul of the Host Club, and his brother and the self-appointed manager are engaged in boisterous discussions with various schoolmates about the sheer excitement of, well, _everything_.

By the end of lunch, having carefully limited his input to the group discussion, Kaoru has managed to succeed in more-or-less 'finishing his meal' without actually having eaten a single bite. He would have failed if Kyouya (or Haruhi, since Kaoru makes it a point to share his food with her) had been with them, so thankfully the two third-year seniors have cloistered themselves away in the clubroom for some much needed peace and quiet. Today is a big day for them.

The brothers beg off their customers and duck into the loo to ensure that they cannot follow – eventually, they poke their heads out to sneak a peek, and when they see that there are much fewer people in the corridor, they set off for the clubroom as inconspicuously as possible.

Kaoru uses his key to gain access, and the two of them ease themselves gently into the room before swiftly locking it again.

On the ornate sofa near the enormous windows, there are two figures in the shadow of the partially drawn curtains. Everything feels hushed and special within these four walls.

"Heh." Hikaru smiles wryly and _tenderly_ at them. Beside him, Kaoru too allows himself to just stand there and gaze despite feeling like a horrid intruder.

Their exhausted seniors are asleep. Kyouya is sitting upright – albeit tilted to one side and angled to accommodate Tamaki – with his legs extended and ankles crossed. His spectacles are still perched on his nose and there are papers on his lap, and somehow the image he presents makes it seem like he dropped off into the nap unwillingly. Tamaki, on the other hand, has his shoes off and his feet resting on the length of the sofa; he'd also removed his blazer and is using it as a blanket. His head is pillowed on his best friend's shoulder; in turn, Kyouya's tilt has caused him to use the top of Tamaki's head as his own pillow.

Regulating his footfalls scrupulously, Hikaru pads over to them and lowers himself to the edge of the coffee table in front of the sofa, pushing some of the files away before wriggling his bum onto the low table proper. He leans forward to bring his face closer to Tamaki's, stretches out a hand and touches his palm to Tamaki's cheek in a way that makes Kaoru's chest tighten with unnamed emotion. "Tono," Hikaru whispers with a grin, entirely cheeky and sly. But his fingers have slid to Tamaki's jawline and his mouth is hovering dangerously close, and his body language is saying something that his tone and words are not.

Fear, maybe. That unnamed emotion. It is something raw and… covetous. Kaoru is scared of such gestures because he doesn't know what they mean anymore. In a world that he once knew, it would have meant love, amorous or possibly parental. It did not mean platonic, not in Japan at least. In another world that Kaoru also grew up in, in the western parts of the globe where his mother emphasised the opening of the mind, it was an act of human relations falling anywhere in the spectrum from friendship upwards. These types of gestures are commonplace in the world of a Hitachiin, they are the mother tongue, the primary means of communication… but they are scarce and heavily restricted by propriety in the realms of a Suou, a Haninozuka, a Morinozuka, an Ootori. They've gotten too intimate with each other in this club, all the lines have been redrawn, all the boundaries have been crushed, and Kaoru kisses his Honey-senpai on the lips and is in love with his Kyouya-senpai.

_What does Hikaru do with Tono?_ Kaoru asks himself only now, the question freshly blooming in his consciousness like a terrible revelation. _What does Hikaru do with Mori-senpai?_

And, _why didn't I have the sense to ask this earlier?_

Mori promised Kaoru that he would keep watch. Mori said he would keep a handle on this situation, and Kaoru holds fast to that promise.

Hikaru lets out an indulgent exhale and starts to gather up Kyouya's papers. He looks at each sheet to check that he is arranging them by page number before putting them in a neat pile on the coffee table; then, he picks up a silver tray to clear away the half-eaten plates of food, the cutlery and the half-full glasses of water. Ordinarily the tray would go onto the trolley that would be removed by the cleaning staff at the end of the day, but they have no listed activities today and therefore their room would be left off the roster – only classrooms are cleaned and tidied everyday – so, when he is done, Hikaru lifts the tray and points to the door, indicating to Kaoru that he will take it down to the nearest cafeteria and will be back soon.

Kaoru nods his understanding, zipping to the door lithely to hold it open and glowing at his brother for his thoughtfulness as he sees him out.

And then it is just Kaoru. Just him and the silence of the room.

He settles himself into a lone armchair perpendicular to them, keeping his head down.

He looks at them, and he looks down again.

He thinks of everything that Tamaki has done for him, for Hikaru, for them as twins, and he remembers the radiant greatness of his friend, his inherent and incomparable goodness of heart. He reminds himself of how much he loves Tamaki, and he looks at them again.

This time, there isn't something awful lacerating the insides of his gut.

Yes.

_Yes._ He stares himself down, and this greedy selfish ferocious thing abates and slinks away.

Tamaki saved his life. He owes so much of what he is to Tamaki. He would be adrift and lost without Tamaki. He has no right to be jealous of anything that Tamaki has earned. Tamaki has suffered much, so he deserves much in return.

Kaoru looks once more, and finally he recognises himself in the warm adoring way he feels towards the both of the sleeping seniors. He creeps forward to the coffee table, bending over slightly to read the material – it is all related to the hugely significant meeting that they will conduct after school this very day.

Tamaki will attend as the Grantaine representative, and Kyouya as the Ootori representative. The contract in question is worth hundreds of millions of dollars, possibly even billions. This is the real corporate world.

_[To be continued]_

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><p>.<p>

Notes

First off, an apology. No, this is not the complete Chapter 7B. It's just, I needed to post a notice and standalone notices are not really allowed, and also it is bad to get readers' hopes up only to confront them with a disappointing chunk of non-story text.

The passages above _are_ the actual start of Chapter 7B, but the reason why I am not able to go on is because I have become aware of a terrible mistake in a fairly major plot point of the story. Please let me explain.

I have been relying on English fansubbed digitised versions of the manga while writing this story, and in Chapter 77 page 30 of the manga, it is mentioned that: "Of course, about the distribution of the new medication [slez medicine], the Ootori Group will take care of it."

Unfortunately, this is not quite right. I have recently obtained the complete set of RAWS for the Ouran manga (I don't know why I didn't do this earlier, damn it), and the correct translation of what Yoshio says to Yuzuru should be that **the Ootori Group will have full rights of distribution over the Slez medication IN JAPAN**.

This may sound like a small error, but it is actually significant enough for me to need to go back and change several large chunks of the story. The reason is because I have misinterpreted it as being that the Ootori Group is in control of the distribution of the medicine _worldwide_, and therefore why I have written it such that Yuuichi is in charge of the Japan + wider Asian release and Akito is in charge of the Oceania release. Kyouya, of course, is managing the European release with Tamaki. But all of this is wrong. Now I _finally_ understand what Kyouya was trying to explain in those darned chapters, and why Yuzuru's plan is able to help the Grantaines. I always thought it didn't make sense because the development of new medicines is regarded to be a hugely expensive and high-risk venture, but now I see what he was doing.

You see, pharmaceutical research and development usually costs a hell of a lot (we're talking billions here), and because it is so expensive to develop new medicines, this is used as the justification for the high costs of medicines as sold to the public. Some people dispute that pharmaceutical research and development actually really costs so much because the data that we have are only those voluntarily released by pharmaceutical companies, of course. All the debate about the costs of creating new medicines aside, the critical point I am trying to show here is that companies have gone bust from trying to develop new medicines. It is the sort of thing with a high failure rate, not to mention it is not the sort of thing that can be done casually. I have no idea how Suou Yuzuru even managed to develop such a medicine or whatever, because the amount of resources and expertise is massive. I believe it if you tell me that the Ootoris did it, but not if any Suou did it since this is not at all their industry.

Therefore, I read the fansubbed version as correct – that Yoshio has such a huge hand in the development of the medicine that the medicine essentially was created by their doctors and partially belongs to them, the Ootori Group.

Tragically, this is apparently incorrect.

The manga actually means that the medicine belongs to the Grantaine company, and the Ootori Group has merely secured the exclusive rights to distribute the medicine in Japan. This means that the Ootori Group has no power to manage the medicine outside of Japan unless authorised by Grantaine company to do so. Further, it seems that the reason why Yuzuru is indebted to Yoshio is _not_ because Yoshio had a hand in developing the medicine, but because Yoshio helped to keep the development of the medicine strictly confidential such that Shizue wouldn't find out.

I seriously, seriously have no idea why this medicine is developed by a Suou instead of an Ootori. I understand that it is terrible to be indebted to Ootori Yoshio, but what is the point of making a family the experts in medicine and then letting the Suous be the one to make medical breakthroughs? My god, the mangaka really does love her Suous, doesn't she?

Anyway, Yoshio would be quite pleased about securing the rights because of the large profits involved. And Kyouya mentioned in page 30 that "The Chairman is trying to make the Grantaine family earn enormous profits thanks to the development of this new medicine." Doesn't make sense, right? Because drug creation is very much like a losing business and this should be common enough knowledge, so I always wondered about how they even expect to recoup the money to break even in the first place, much less talk about profits.

But in this case it is different. Why? Because the money poured into the drug development was Suou money. Do you see? Yuzuru used Suou money to invest in Anneau Laboratory, and then the Laboratory became a joint stock company owned by the Grantaines, which means that _all the revenue_ goes to the Grantaine family. In other words, all the expenses were borne by the Suou family, and they get _none of the money back_ because it all goes to the Grantaines. So Yuzuru didn't just screw his mother over, but he literally _gave away several billions of the family wealth_ to another family.

In this type of situation, Yoshio is bound to pounce. He will happily accept the distribution rights in Japan alone because then he also gets a generous share of the profit without needing to have invested in the first place. No loss, all profit. For the Ootoris and the Grantaines, this example essentially illustrates the advantage they will gain:

You want to start a small business selling beaded jewellery. You first need to invest in it by buying the thread and the beads and other assorted parts. Let's say the raw materials of one necklace costs $20, and you decide to sell each necklace for $30. Hence, your profit margin is $30 - $20 = $10 per necklace only, because you have to take into account your initial expenditure.

However, if someone else is bearing the costs of buying the raw materials, your profit for each necklace is basically the full $30! That is what Yuzuru did, and the Grantaines and Ootoris are the ones benefitting from it. As such, the Grantaines really will earn enormous profits because they didn't spend anything in the first place!

Which means, omg, that Yuuichi and Akito have no rights releasing the medicine elsewhere, and Kyouya was only allowed to take part in the European release because Tamaki persuaded his parents to authorise it.

This in turn means that Kyouya's position in the meetings is almost completely dependent on Tamaki's, and _ohhhhh boy_. It's _his_ field, his family's territory, _he_ knows what he's talking about, _this is his world_. Yet despite all of that, and despite the fact that Kyouya is undisputedly better at business and everything involving finance and politics, Tamaki is the boss. Tamaki is the Grantaine representative, and what he says, goes. He is the only one with the right to make this decision because the medicine belongs to the Grantaines, and in fact I think even this chapter may be wrong because there is no position for an Ootori representative to be there at all.

Ahhhh, poor Kyouya. Poor poor Kyouya. The Queen to the King on the chessboard, indeed.

Um, so. I am actually really quite pissed off at making this careless mistake, and I am on the verge of the horizon of despair that would lead to the Kazuha Chapter. It's not that I don't know what corrections I need to make, but the thought of having to rework these thousand-word chapters makes me want to cry and give up. Nonetheless, this weekend is the Good Friday-Easter long weekend, so I will be going back to the previous chapters to do my best and change it as necessary. This also means that the next chapter will take very long to be sorted out, and... I don't know. I really don't know. TnT

If I fail, I guess you'll know it by the Kazuha Chapter ;_;

**YES, I AM STILL ALIVE. Yes, I still care about this fic. I'm going through the chapters slowly to do the edit, as a result there are now inconsistencies within the story. Every time I think I want to let it go, I discover that I can't. I still want Kaoru to get to know Okiko and Kiyomi and Yuuichi and Akito. I still want Kaoru to get in too deep with the Ootori family. I still want to tell you all the secrets Kazuha has been keeping. I still want to delve into Hitachiin family history. I still want Kaoru to have a future. _I still want these stupid characters to fall in love._ – 16 February 2014.**


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